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anytriptiline: my 12 year journey with amitriptyline / Elavil


anytriptaline

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5 minutes ago, Gridley said:

 

It really depends on whether you want to be off the drugs or not.  Some people do, some don't.  It's a deeply personal decision that you''ll have to make for yourself.  

 

I'm not able to pick up the link but there's a SA thread, "Has anyone decided it was best to stay on meds indefinitely?"  Google 

"SurvivingAntidepressants.org has anyone decided it was best to stay on meds"  There's a lengthy discussion with many members giving their rationales, and it may help you with your decision

 

If you do decide to taper, you haven't been on the nortriptyline long, so you could just switch back to your previous dose of amitriptyline, hold until you stabilize from this latest drug switch, then taper according to the guidelines I've given you previous.

 

Oh no, I want to be off drugs right now, the problem is that I can't sleep without them, I already tried and I feel great without them, the problem is that everything starts to fall apart after the 4th day of no sleep

 

I got back to the same amitriptyline dose yesterday, I got KO'd pretty terribly. I'm an hour into deciding if I should go to work the afternoon, it already sucks and I'm just lying in front of the computer trying to get some work done.

 

I really wish I could find something to make the day go easier, I'm about to just quitting again

 

My plan for this weekend is to fill 2 weeks worth of pills at this same dose (37.5mg) to "stabilize" and see if the change to grounded pills doesn't do anything funny, then start the BrassMonkey style taper

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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  • Moderator Emeritus
17 minutes ago, anytriptaline said:

I really wish I could find something to make the day go easier,

 

I previously suggested magnesium and omegas to you.  Many members find them calming and helpful.

 

 

 

Please research all supplements first and only add in one at a time and at a low dose in case you do experience problems.
 
Here are some sleep aid techniques that might work for you:
 
Tips to help sleep - so many of us have that awful withdrawal insomnia
 
 
Trick and tips to fall asleep faster
 
This link contains helpful information, including insomnia and also non-drug coping skills.  
 
 
Some members have found Melatonin helpful with insomnia.   
See Melatonin for sleep   It's best to start at a very low dosage, such as .25mg, and gradually increase if needed to the lowest effective dose.  
l
 
 

Gridley Introduction

 

Lexapro 20 mg since 2004.  Begin Brassmonkey Slide Taper Jan. 2017.   

End 2017 year 1 of taper at 9.25mg 

End 2018 year 2 of taper at 4.1mg

End 2019 year 3 of taper at 1.0mg  

Oct. 30, 2020  Jump to zero from 0.025mg.  Current dose: 0.000mg

3 year, 10 month taper is 100% complete.

 

Ativan 1 mg to 1.875mg 1986-2020, two CT's and reinstatements

Nov. 2020, 7-week Ativan-Valium crossover to 18.75mg Valium

Feb. 2021, begin 10%/4 week taper of 18.75mg Valium 

End 2021  year 1 of Valium taper at 6mg

End 2022 year 2 of Valium taper at 2.75mg 

End 2023 year 3 of Valium taper at 1mg

Jan. 24, 2024: Hold at 1mg and shift to Imipramine taper.

Taper is 95% complete.

 

Imipramine 75 mg daily since 1986.  Jan.-Sept. 2016 tapered to 14.4mg  

March 22, 2022: Begin 10%/4 week taper

Aug. 5, 2022: hold at 9.5mg and shift to Valium taper

Jan. 24, 2024: Resume Imipramine taper.  Current dose as of Feb. 22: 7.6mg

Taper is 90% complete.  

  

Supplements: multiple, quercetin, omega-3, vitamins C, E and D3, magnesium glycinate, probiotics, zinc, melatonin .3mg, anti-candida, iron, serrapeptase, nattokinase


I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice but simply information based on my own experience, as well as other members who have survived these drugs.

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Sadly my problem right now is not being lucid enough during the day, I sleep like a log thanks to the pills, but I will keep track of your suggestions if I get insomnia during the taper

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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  • ChessieCat changed the title to anytriptiline: my 12 year journey with amitriptyline / Elavil
  • 1 month later...

OK, so maybe an update.

 

I returned to the old meds and gave them a couple of weeks to set in before finally starting the amitriptyline taper 3 weeks ago, everything has been going fine, which means the same set of symptoms as always (always tired, sleep a lot, depersonalization, dizziness, brain fog), the last three days have been an exceptions because I had some intermittent sleep, but nothing extreme

 

But I had to quit my job, I reached a point when I was starting to get real anxiety attacks from the thought of going to the office in this state and I just stayed home. At least they let me "rest" this week being fully remote, next week I need to go to the office part time and I'm done.

 

The future looks really bleak, there is no way I can hold an office job anymore and I'm even wondering if a fully remote is even an option, right now I just set all my alarms off and sleep as much as I want to, the last two days I've been awaken by people at the office sending me messages

 

I do believe the slow taper is the only way of getting out of this but I hate it took me so long until I was at my lowest to start it. It is going to take years until I get rid of this poison and money is going to become an issue sooner or later

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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  • Moderator Emeritus
19 hours ago, anytriptaline said:

It is going to take years until I get rid of this poison

 

It's great that you're on your way with your taper.   Yes, it takes years but you're on your way and that's a big accomplishment.

Gridley Introduction

 

Lexapro 20 mg since 2004.  Begin Brassmonkey Slide Taper Jan. 2017.   

End 2017 year 1 of taper at 9.25mg 

End 2018 year 2 of taper at 4.1mg

End 2019 year 3 of taper at 1.0mg  

Oct. 30, 2020  Jump to zero from 0.025mg.  Current dose: 0.000mg

3 year, 10 month taper is 100% complete.

 

Ativan 1 mg to 1.875mg 1986-2020, two CT's and reinstatements

Nov. 2020, 7-week Ativan-Valium crossover to 18.75mg Valium

Feb. 2021, begin 10%/4 week taper of 18.75mg Valium 

End 2021  year 1 of Valium taper at 6mg

End 2022 year 2 of Valium taper at 2.75mg 

End 2023 year 3 of Valium taper at 1mg

Jan. 24, 2024: Hold at 1mg and shift to Imipramine taper.

Taper is 95% complete.

 

Imipramine 75 mg daily since 1986.  Jan.-Sept. 2016 tapered to 14.4mg  

March 22, 2022: Begin 10%/4 week taper

Aug. 5, 2022: hold at 9.5mg and shift to Valium taper

Jan. 24, 2024: Resume Imipramine taper.  Current dose as of Feb. 22: 7.6mg

Taper is 90% complete.  

  

Supplements: multiple, quercetin, omega-3, vitamins C, E and D3, magnesium glycinate, probiotics, zinc, melatonin .3mg, anti-candida, iron, serrapeptase, nattokinase


I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice but simply information based on my own experience, as well as other members who have survived these drugs.

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  • 2 months later...

Another update, since I don't know what to do with the taper

 

This has been my taper so far, starting from 37.5 mg amitriptyline

Sept. 5 - 33.75 mg (4 weeks)

Oct. 3 - 30.375 mg (4 weeks)

Oct. 31 - 27.34 mg (3 weeks)

Nov. 21- 24.60 mg (starting third week today)

 

Symptoms haven't changed, still unable to wake up on time, tired all day, depersonalization, etc. Since everything looked the same I decided to make the 27,34mg taper just three weeks. 

 

Everything looked the same but the last few days of that taper I started two things. I took Acetyl l-carnitine, first 500mg but later 1g, usually accompanied with choline. I also started a homemade ZMA since I used it successfully before, it's just Zinc, Magnesium and Vitamin B6, I had been using Zinc and Magnesium intermittently the last few months without issues

 

It took like 4 days to kick in but I felt amazing for a week, tired but I was able to think clearly and the depersonalization was gone. However it started to mess with my sleep and decided to quit the two just to see who was the culprit.

 

I waited 5 days and reintroduced just the ZMA, the first night (this sunday) I was unable to sleep at all, second night I slept 4 hours (I also included 30mg of hydroxyzine), third night quit the ZMA but had to repeat the hydroxyzine since I couldn't sleep, overslept as usual. Yesterday, the fourth night also dropped the hydroxyzine and slept as usual, but have terrible depersonalization and tiredness, coupled with a case of IBS that rivals the crap I had to deal with last year

 

It's pretty obvious I'm in no condition to taper next week. So what should I do? Go back to the previous dose, or let's say, hold on this dose for at least 2-3 weeks?

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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  • 2 months later...

Next update I guess

December wasn't really kind, but I went through it

 

I noticed I was reacting badly to melatonin and valerian, for year those were my mild/don't do anything treatments

 

I decided not to take anything new for the remainder of the year

 

First weeks of January were really good, I barely suffered any depersonalization problems. Never had troubles taking the car, slept well. In a scale from 1 to 5 I usually rate my days from 0 to 2. There was a week when I felt "Damn, I guess this feels like a 3". I was tired as usual but was able to think clearly for the first time in years while taking the meds

 

But things went back to normal the last few days of January and all of February has been awful. My insomnia is OK right now, but I'm again tired all day, physically and mentally, today I wasn't able to pick the car to an appointment due to terrible depersonalization. I feel these episodes are shorter than usual, but anything less than perfect doesn't work for me

 

To make things worse, I got a job offer to a very prestigious company, if I play right I could make up to 3 times the best salary I ever had. They contacted me in January and I felt I was very lucky, but in my current state I couldn't accept any offer. To make things worse my family knows about it, if they know I couldn't accept the offer they are going to push me into taking more meds blindly in order to "fix" this. And I don't know how I'll react either. Save your optimism, this is truly the opportunity of a lifetime, all chances point to never get an opportunity like this ever again

 

I should have started the taper years ago when I was still able to function normally :(

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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  • 3 months later...

How are you doing now @anytriptaline?

Early September 2019 - One 25mg dose of Sertraline taken.

Early October 2019 - Five 25mg doses (pills) of Sertraline taken for five consecutive days.

Withdrawal/reaction happened on the 27th of October (2019) in the evening.

Symptoms that have gone: Joint and muscle pain/weakness in my legs, phantom senses, chemical dread, chemical fear, DP/DR has gotten a lot lot better than what it is now, it was one of my worst and all-encompassing symptoms when it started, awful aphasia, parkinsonism, head pressure, pressure in my frontal lobe when trying to think/work out something, inability to plan or execute anything//feelings of being literally scatterbrained, inability to think in my head other than slight acknowledgements - the voice in my head sounded weak and 'small' like it was restrained to a much smaller area of my brain, constant fatigue, emotional numbness, constant eyestrain, and changes in perception of colour/contrast in sight.

Main remaining symptoms: Visual Snow/HPPD, derealisation, tinnitus, and brain/cog fog.

Drug free.

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36 minutes ago, Icip said:

How are you doing now @anytriptaline?

 

Much better, thank you for asking

I was going to write an update next week, I've been busy with work and personal projects

 

"Much better" is relative, just the situation changed thanks to the COVID lockdown. I still have my main issues, depersonalization, tiredness, dizziness, reduced to a degree but not to my complete liking, however, they are way way easier to manage when people expect you to be at home all day long.

 

I dread the day when I'll be expected to function like a normal people should, right now I'm enjoying the 100% remote work

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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@anytriptaline,

 

Do you not find that keeping busy makes your symptoms more tolerable? I have a 50/50 experience with it, sometimes being active reminds me of what it used to feel like, then others not so much.

What is your experience of depersonalisation like? Does it increase when you’re outside?

Any decrease in symptoms though is amazing! Is life feeling a little easier?

Early September 2019 - One 25mg dose of Sertraline taken.

Early October 2019 - Five 25mg doses (pills) of Sertraline taken for five consecutive days.

Withdrawal/reaction happened on the 27th of October (2019) in the evening.

Symptoms that have gone: Joint and muscle pain/weakness in my legs, phantom senses, chemical dread, chemical fear, DP/DR has gotten a lot lot better than what it is now, it was one of my worst and all-encompassing symptoms when it started, awful aphasia, parkinsonism, head pressure, pressure in my frontal lobe when trying to think/work out something, inability to plan or execute anything//feelings of being literally scatterbrained, inability to think in my head other than slight acknowledgements - the voice in my head sounded weak and 'small' like it was restrained to a much smaller area of my brain, constant fatigue, emotional numbness, constant eyestrain, and changes in perception of colour/contrast in sight.

Main remaining symptoms: Visual Snow/HPPD, derealisation, tinnitus, and brain/cog fog.

Drug free.

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Quote

Do you not find that keeping busy makes your symptoms more tolerable?

Not really, there are days, not so common, where I can be really productive. Others the depersonalization hits and the only thing that works is to lay down for a while, a couple of minutes when I'm really lost helps.. Pushing through it usually makes things worse

 

Quote

What is your experience of depersonalisation like? Does it increase when you’re outside?

It feels like being drunk without the fun, trouble connecting thoughts, extreme clumsiness, diziness, pinhole vision, a sense of everything being "off". It doesn't really increases outside or indoors, I just try to stay indoors as much as possible for safety. Sometimes driving a car helps (if I feel good enough to drive), but it usually comes with a huge crash as soon as I park. It's like my brain understands it's a life-or-death situation and tries to keep me alive with whatever energies it has

 

When I get depersonalization and I am outside (or someone needs me outside) I sometimes get anxiety and in the last year panic attacks, but it is more the pressure of having to function properly 

 

Quote

Any decrease in symptoms though is amazing! Is life feeling a little easier?

 

Not really, life is feeling a little easier because no one expects me at the moment to do the things I can't do, as soon as they are expected from me (driving for hours and being on time, spending hours sitting working with no chance of laying down), then things will get complicated again

 

I wish I could be more optimistic but I can't see the tapering having noticeable results for at least a year, I'm barely reaching the "normal" dose for insomnia

 

Talking about my insomnia, that is getting controlled, at least I have that. It's been two months since I started 300mcg of melatonin and I think that is the secret, never thought so little melatonin could do so much good.

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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@anytriptaline,

 

Could that depersonalisation be something to do with your heart? I feel a little spaced out upon standing; my heart rate jumps when I do. Not sure if it qualifies for POTS, but I know a few members who share that, may be worth checking that one out with your GP if you haven’t already?

 

I have all of that too (depersonalisation), mine is always worse outdoors - everything looks quite alien and wrong, trouble with thoughts too. Would you say that’s brain fog, or connected to derealisation? That can be anxiety causing both of those for you, or overstimulation.

 

I didn’t taper, but I think not noticing results during a taper is a good thing. You certainly don’t want to feel worse - the results will happen once off the drug.

 

The brain doesn’t need much does it, two carrots provide enough calories to walk two miles. Makes the doses of ADs we’re given seem like quite a lot.

 

Icip.

Early September 2019 - One 25mg dose of Sertraline taken.

Early October 2019 - Five 25mg doses (pills) of Sertraline taken for five consecutive days.

Withdrawal/reaction happened on the 27th of October (2019) in the evening.

Symptoms that have gone: Joint and muscle pain/weakness in my legs, phantom senses, chemical dread, chemical fear, DP/DR has gotten a lot lot better than what it is now, it was one of my worst and all-encompassing symptoms when it started, awful aphasia, parkinsonism, head pressure, pressure in my frontal lobe when trying to think/work out something, inability to plan or execute anything//feelings of being literally scatterbrained, inability to think in my head other than slight acknowledgements - the voice in my head sounded weak and 'small' like it was restrained to a much smaller area of my brain, constant fatigue, emotional numbness, constant eyestrain, and changes in perception of colour/contrast in sight.

Main remaining symptoms: Visual Snow/HPPD, derealisation, tinnitus, and brain/cog fog.

Drug free.

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That was my feeling, that there might be something wrong with my heart. I used to measure my HRV and it came up pretty damn bad, to the point people claim I was doing something wrong (I used two apps) or the pills were doing something to my heart

 

Did a checkup recently and everything came out fine, I wasn't checked for POTS, but the doctor there told me I probably had low testosterone (also checked that)

 

I think I define brain fog and depersonalization as two different things that sound quite the same. The pill always gave me brain fog, but that didn't stopped me from being able to function, depersonalization does

 

Anyway, I just got laid off from my "part time" job yesterday due to the effects of the lockdowns. It sucks because it will be nearly impossible to find a company that will give the concessions this guy was giving me

 

Can't say I'm too stressed about it, let's see what happens. At least it is giving me plenty of time to work in a personal project that might turn lucrative in the future

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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  • 1 month later...

Well, most of June sucked pretty bad, had terrible depersonalization most of the month, one week I wasn't able to drive the car and that worried my family. It was a great time to be laid off, it is hundreds of times less stressful when you aren't supposed to function properly and have the option to just lay down on the couch all day

 

Things have been going pretty well since the last week of June, to the point that again I'm looking for another job, but want to take a rest at least until next year. Rates are down and don't want to let anyone down if I can't work properly after being hired, plus I'm enjoying my personal projects a lot, being my own boss and creating my own products have brought a joy to my career that I wasn't feeling since college

 

I filled another month of pills today, I keep at least 3 weeks worth of pills right now since I'm worried I could get hospitalized from Covid and the doctors would throw all the progress down the toilet if I'm not prepared. In two weeks I'll be down to 30% of the pill weight already. I'm actually surprised how well I'm sleeping these days, way better than a year ago, brings me hope at what lies ahead, I feel if the next six months go "smooth" then it will be an indication I could finally get rid of this poison sometime in 2022

 

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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Well, this week wasn't as good as the other one. Had more tiredness and dizziness than depersonalization, what I hate is how they force me to take some rest. Not that I hate that, but I know the labor world can't expect someone to take 1-2 hour rests so often, I wish I could be fully functional again

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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  • 2 weeks later...

Another update

 

Last two weeks have been fairly OK. I've had depersonalization as always but less severe attacks, I've been able to take the car any time I've wanted (although in the middle of the pandemic it gets little use). I've also been taking home made ZMA (zinc, magnesium and vitamin B6). I don't know how much is that responsible for this well being

 

I've been worrying about money, hopefully I can take a full time office job after the virus settles down

 

Anyway, a pretty destructive hurricane is about to arrive. Wish me luck, it is a pain to deal with something like that, thankfully I am thinking pretty clearly today, just dealing with the anxiety of having to try to save my stuff

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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  • 2 weeks later...

Update

 

The hurricane was BAD, I'm still dealing with the damage it caused. The day it arrived I stayed awake until 4am. The only thing I was grateful was that the side effects of the drugs have started to improve and was able to pull it off

 

These two weeks have been OK, but depersonalization has happened again, two days I had severe episodes, but they only lasted around an hour

 

Really want to find a job right now, the few people hiring are asking for remote work, when the pandemic settles down it will get more difficult to find such arrangement 

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hey there! We’re tapering the same drug. I’m at 5.4 mg and started tapering from 11 mg in Apr 2019. I’m surprised you made it to 7.5 mg so quickly! Were you sticking with the 10% per month rule?

 

Sorry about the hurricane damage and your job situation. Hope you find something that can fit your preferences!

 

As you taper I find it’s best to hold if you experience an increase in symptoms. This is what Brassmonkey and so many others recommend. Best to let your system settle and recalibrate before plowing ahead with the next cut. There’s no rush with this and it’s better to reduce safely and slowly than to cause more issues on the way down. Food for thought. 

Apr 2018: Began 10 mg Amitriptyline (for headaches & insomnia from concussion).

Jul - Aug 2018: Fast taper to 5 mg and then 2.5 mg (too fast, hellish withdrawal at 2.5 mg). Sept 2018: Reinstated 10 mg (many symptoms improved). Oct 2018 - Apr 2019: Updosed & stabilized on 11 mg (2 waves at 3 and 5 months post-withdrawal). Apr 2019 - Apr 2020: Tapered 0.5-0.25 mg per month using compounded pills: 11 mg —> 6 mg. (2 waves at 12 and 16 months post-withdrawal.) Apr 2020 - present: Switched to a liquid taper at rate of 0.1 mg per month. Currently: 1.1 mg. No more waves. 

 

Supplements: Omega-3 fish oil, Vit B12, coenzyme Q10, Hawthorn extract (for tachycardia) Tools for insomnia/waves (as needed): Epsom salt foot soaks, 0.5 mg Melatonin, quality time, waves WILL PASS. Lifestyle: Eat real foods, mostly plants; sunlight, walking, yoga; symptom tracking on adapted Glenmullen chart.

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No, I did shorter tapers and sometimes decreased more than 10%, plan to upload my schedule in September when I'm a year into the process. But that is over, I don't plan to cut more than 10% every four weeks, probably will be more conservative if needed

 

I know it's better if there is no rush, but I haven't been able to hold a proper job since November 2018. I knew I had to taper sooner or later, it is a shame I had to start when there was no other alternative

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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  • 2 weeks later...

Well, the streak was broken

 

I lowered the dose on the 13th, was starting to have more depersonalization the days before. That weekend and the start of this week were a mess, I had depersonalization big time again, the crippling one, plus had serious bouts of insomnia, I slept so little in three days that I took some hydroxizine as a precaution one night

It only started to improve this Thursday, right now I'm feeling fine, starting to catch up with work from personal projects that were left untouched due to this. It was demotivating since I had a long streak feeling OK, trying to take a remote job like this would be a pain, downright impossible if I had to be in an office

 

I'm probably getting scolded but I was cleaning my room and found I had a bottle of niacinamide close to expiration. Can't remember why I bought it but I read it might be good for insomnia, been taking 1.5 grams since Monday and maybe it works? I have slept way better, but who knows

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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  • 2 weeks later...

Can't say the last two weeks have been great. Still dealing with the depersonalization episodes. Plus, been having some insomnia problems. I can sleep fine for two days at most and the next one I would sleep little. Also feeling extremely sedated and my appetite and food intake capacity has taken a hit, I always gravitated to the skinny side until I took amitriptyline, now I'm taking so little I'm probably gravitating to it again

 

Anyway, it's been a year since I started this journey, this has been my schedule so far. Only writing it for information purposes, I don't claim this is a healthy schedule to use

Start Date -From (mg) - To (mg) - % drop - duration (weeks) - notes

9/5/19    -   37.5  - 33.75 - 10% - 4 weeks

10/3/19  -  33.75 - 30.38 - 10% - 4 weeks

10/31/19 - 30.38 - 27.34 - 10% - 3 weeks

11/21/19 - 27.34 - 24.6 - 10% - 4 weeks

12/19/19 - 24.6 - 22.14 - 10% - 3 weeks

1/9/20 -    22.14 - 19.93 - 10% - 3 weeks

1/30/20 - 19.93 - 17.94 - 10% - 3 weeks

2/20/20 - 17.94 - 16.14 - 6 weeks (Brass monkey method)

4/2/20 -   16.14 - 14.53 - 10% - 3 weeks

4/23/20 - 14.53 - 11.62 - 20% - 4 weeks

5/21/20 - 11.62 - 9.30 - 20% - 4 weeks

6/18/20 - 9.30 - 8.37 - 10% - 4 weeks

7/16/20 - 8.37 - 7.53 - 10% - 4 weeks

8/13/20 - 7.53 - 6.78 - 10% - 4 weeks

 

As you can see, I tended to rush at parts, specially when the pandemic started. Now I came to a point I don't feel as confident anymore. Next week I'm starting a 6 week taper to test and have promised to not make a less than 4 week taper anymore

 

 

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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  • 1 month later...

I guess a follow up is needed

 

I been feeling particularly well since I wrote the last entry. Not great at the moment but not so bad as this year's baseline. I had like a couple of weeks were I had ZERO depersonalization episodes, and it kinda frighten me. They have come back but at reduced severity

 

I'm starting a remote job this Monday, so financial problems will calm down, although I still dread not being ready when offices open again. I'm pausing the tapering just in case, this taper is going to last 8 weeks

 

Been really busy with my personal projects, I'm going to miss not having the time to work on them as much as I did these last months

Edited by anytriptaline
missed the tapering pause

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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  • 2 months later...

Has been a while since I was here

 

The job start turned out to be a nightmare due to circumstances. New very noisy neighbors moved in September, it didn't bother me that much until I started working and couldn't concentrate. I politely asked them if they could keep the noise down during working hours, then it turned into arguments where they told me to build a wall and informed me the construction I was living in was illegal. I feared I was going to lose this job so in a matter of 15 days I found another place. I had been living in that apartment for the last eight years, it was a hit of nostalgia I didn't need. Plus, the place I found is not of my liking, so I hope to move again once the pandemic calms

 

I still have this job, but I hate it, 12 hour workdays, people sending mails until I go to bed, practically no lunch break. Remote jobs in Mexico sucks. And I hate I had to sacrifice so much due to it

 

On the bright side (and what brings you here) the tapering is going great. Since October I have done 8-weeks and 6-weeks taperings. Moving to 4 weeks again this Thursday

 

Depersonalization has improved dramatically, there was a period in November-December where I had zero depersonalization. Thankfully it coincided with the place hunt, otherwise I wouldn't had been able to do it. I was able to drive late at night without a feeling of dread since who knows when

 

It came back strong for a few days around Christmas but it has since calmed down

 

I'm sleeping great, I don't get the big depersonalization after taking the pills and have been able to move my pill taking from 7pm to 9pm, which is helping me work on my personal projects (who have been going great lately)

 

Other aspect that shows me my body is adapting well is that I can't eat what I used to and returning to my former skinny self, something I don't particularly like

 

I'm already at 4.4mg, so the scary drop isn't that far on the horizon

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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  • Administrator

Good to hear the tapering is going well. You still have a number of steps before you go off amitriptyline completely. No rush.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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  • 1 month later...

I’m also tapering Amitriptyline, down to 6mg from 50. How are you doing? Do you feel dizzy and fatigued still? Those are my biggest issues to date but manageable.

Completely drug free 11/26/22 🎉

 

Supplements: Magnesium citrate: 250 mg; Fish oil: 1200 mg

 

“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” - Victor Frankl

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21 hours ago, Mia1 said:

I’m also tapering Amitriptyline, down to 6mg from 50. How are you doing? Do you feel dizzy and fatigued still? Those are my biggest issues to date but manageable.

Dizziness and what I call "depersonalization" have improved a lot since November, I still get bad episodes from time to time but nothing dramatic

Fatigue is still an issue. It started to get bad again this year. It feels horrible to wake up for work after 8-9 hours of sleep, I try to handle it by sleeping 10-12 hours on weekends if job doesn't interfere 

 

Thankfully my insomnia is still manageable at this dose, hope it continues that way until I drop off from amitriptyline

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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  • 2 months later...

Time for an update I guess

 

Things have gone fine, not great as they were in December, but fine

 

The first few months of the new job were a nightmare, 16 hour work days weren't rare, 12 hours was the norm. February I was about to quit because my boss complained people at the team "were going to bed too early". He knows about my insomnia issues and feel the comment was directed towards me. It pissed many people on the team as well

 

Things have improved and I can disconnect after 10-11 hours most of the days (not that bad for a Mexican office job). My side hustle is going great, to the point I feel miserable sometimes knowing many brighter people don't have it as good as me 

 

Depersonalization has come and go, right now I've been suffering from bad bouts, starting a 8-week taper to see if it helps

 

I'm searching for a new place since I don't feel comfortable where I'm renting. No luck so far. Plus, crashed my car today so I will be slowed down for a while when I send it for repairs

 

There's currently a shortage of 4mg perphenazine in my city and it has lasted two months, my reserves are empty. Could only find 10mg, so I'm going to need to cut the pill, I start tonight so wish me luck

 

You'll say, well, you have an analytical balance and are already tapering the other pill? Yes, but with the US border closed I'm rationing the empty capsules I have, if I had to fill two pills they would end faster. Plus, I don't fear perphenazine, doctors over the years reduced or increased the dose dramatically because they believed it was the source of my problems. It felt like placebo, nothing really changed

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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  • 1 month later...

Just an update, the half 10mg perphenazine change went great. It's been a great month considering I haven't gotten bad depersonalization episodes

 

There's a huge shortage of psychiatric pills in the country, my doctor told me to better stock up on perphenazine

 

My biggest worry right now is that the apartment I'm renting gets really hot. The old one never reached over 92F, I have reached it here and the summer hasn't even started. Would it be a good idea to store my meds in the fridge to avoid some sort of heat damage? Temperatures around here can reach around 110F

 

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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  • 2 months later...

Not been doing great.

 

I changed apartments again (the one I was renting ended up having serious leaks issues), the one I ended up renting isn't that great either, I've already dumped a bunch of money just to make it habitable

 

The move coincided with a dose reduction. I'm not sure that was the reason but I haven't slept well in a month, plus depersonalization has returned hard probably due to it

 

I don't know if I should keep my schedule of reducing 10% again in September or keeps things where they are at for a while

 

I hate this, I really benefited from the stability of the apartment I had in November. At this point I will probably just move for while with my parents next year while I look for a place with no rush, and I also hate the idea

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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  • 5 weeks later...

Been sleeping better, although I still have more depersonalization episodes than I which I had

 

Saturday I filled more pills, first time in the new apartment. Last ones were done in the Spring, holy crap, it is a pain to do it in the middle of the Summer while turning off the AC due to the analytical balance. 

 

I was amazed at how little it is. 2.3 mg. I'm considering dropping it completely in the next 6 months. Filling the pills is getting increasingly difficult, and judging by other things, it seems amitriptyline at this dose is doing very little for my insomnia, plus, I haven't had bad insomnia episode in over a year

 

Wonder if there are resources on the site on how to tackle the complete removal of a pill

 

After doing it, I plan to take a "vacation" of a couple months before starting the perphenazine tapering

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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  • 3 weeks later...

I don't know what is happening but I don't like it.

I've been beyond sedated the last three weeks, last Thursday was a holiday and I spent 13 hours in bed. This feels as bad as the times I was taking up to 75mg of amitriptyline but now I'm just at 2.36mg. One day I "worked" half of the day in bed due to tiredness and muscle/skeletal pain

 

I don't know if I should "rush" the taper, last 4-5 months I've been taking 6-9 weeks of 10% taperings. Maybe it's necessary to shorten them to 4 or do bigger jumps?

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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  • 3 weeks later...

Hello. It looks like we are tapering off the same drug, namely amitriptyline, though I am way behind you: currently at 10.5mg. It would appear I am very sensitive to any small decreases (due to an attempted cold turkey 2 years ago) so I am now using a very conservative/slow taper of approximately 0.5mg per month for the time being. I wish I could go faster but I need to remain functional for work. 🧠

 

I am thrilled and excited by the fact your symptoms are progressively reducing. This is great and it gives me hope. 🌈

Diazepam: Prescribed for 1 month; CT by GP; free since 2019-12. 

Zopiclone: Prescribed for 6 weeks; very fast taper over 6 weeks; free since 2020-01. 

Amitriptyline: Prescribed 10mg from 2004 to 2012(?); 25mg from 2012(?) to 2019-10; 50mg in 2019 November; attempted CT (very fast taper) in December 2019, reinstated within 2 weeks at 20mg;  Start slow taper in June 2020: 2020-06: 18mg; 2020-08: 16.6mg; 2020-10: 15.9mg; 2020-10: 15.45mg; 2020-10: 15mg; 2020-11:15.45mg; 2020-11: 15mg; 2020-11: 14.5mg; 2020-12: 13.7mg; 2021-02-12: 13mg; 2021-03-05: 12.5mg; 2021-03-11: 12mg; 2021-04-16: 11.5mg; 2021-06-06: 11mg; 2021-10-03: 10.5mg; 2021-11-24: 10mg; 2021-12-23: 9.5mg; 2022-01-19: 9mg; 2022-03-08: 8.5mg; 2022-03-29: 8mg; 2022-05-16: 7.5mg; 2022-06-14: 7mg; 2022-07-13: 6.5mg; 2022-08-21: 6mg; 2022-10-29: 6.3mg; 2022-11-29: 6mg; 2022-12-11: 5.5mg; 2022-12-18: 5mg; 2023-01-21: 4.5mg; 2023-02-17: 4mg; 2023-04-23: 3.5mg; 2023-08-27: 3.3mg; 2023-09-20: 3.1mg; 2023-10-15: 2.9mg; 2023-11-11: 2.7mg; 2023-12-04: 2.5mg; 2024-01-04: 2.3mg

Supplements: Fish oil (1g)

Discontinued supplements: Vitamin C (1.25g); D3 (4000IU); zinc (15mg); boron (3mg); magnesium glycinate (800mg); melatonin (0.3mg, reduced from 0.6mg in 2022-06) discontinued on 2023-12-08

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  • 4 months later...

Long time not here

Currently at 1.62mgs of amitryptiline. Still 4mgs of perphenazine

 

While I'm miles ahead of where I was, I'm still not where I want to be. My insomnia has greatly improved but I still have bouts and need hydroxizine to get out of. Depersonalization, dizziness, tiredness, are still big issues

 

I'm really anxious lately. All Covid restrictions in my state seems to be lift off this Sunday. My boss despises remote work, so he'll soon have legal reasons to want us in the office again. There is no way I can function in an office in the +12 hours workdays plus commute that are common around here

 

And while my side gig has improved a lot, it's still nowhere to being comparable to my salary. I fear my independence is soon coming to an end

 

Anyway, whatever happens I'm planning to make the jump from amitryptiline around August-September and see how it goes. I don't know what I should expect...

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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Great news about your insomnia having improved! It gives me hope. Mine is particularly bad at the moment. Other symptoms are not so bad. It's like my poor body has allocated all of my down-regulated neurotransmitter receptors to the function of sleep... Best of luck for the jump! (I'm jealous - I still have some way to go).

Diazepam: Prescribed for 1 month; CT by GP; free since 2019-12. 

Zopiclone: Prescribed for 6 weeks; very fast taper over 6 weeks; free since 2020-01. 

Amitriptyline: Prescribed 10mg from 2004 to 2012(?); 25mg from 2012(?) to 2019-10; 50mg in 2019 November; attempted CT (very fast taper) in December 2019, reinstated within 2 weeks at 20mg;  Start slow taper in June 2020: 2020-06: 18mg; 2020-08: 16.6mg; 2020-10: 15.9mg; 2020-10: 15.45mg; 2020-10: 15mg; 2020-11:15.45mg; 2020-11: 15mg; 2020-11: 14.5mg; 2020-12: 13.7mg; 2021-02-12: 13mg; 2021-03-05: 12.5mg; 2021-03-11: 12mg; 2021-04-16: 11.5mg; 2021-06-06: 11mg; 2021-10-03: 10.5mg; 2021-11-24: 10mg; 2021-12-23: 9.5mg; 2022-01-19: 9mg; 2022-03-08: 8.5mg; 2022-03-29: 8mg; 2022-05-16: 7.5mg; 2022-06-14: 7mg; 2022-07-13: 6.5mg; 2022-08-21: 6mg; 2022-10-29: 6.3mg; 2022-11-29: 6mg; 2022-12-11: 5.5mg; 2022-12-18: 5mg; 2023-01-21: 4.5mg; 2023-02-17: 4mg; 2023-04-23: 3.5mg; 2023-08-27: 3.3mg; 2023-09-20: 3.1mg; 2023-10-15: 2.9mg; 2023-11-11: 2.7mg; 2023-12-04: 2.5mg; 2024-01-04: 2.3mg

Supplements: Fish oil (1g)

Discontinued supplements: Vitamin C (1.25g); D3 (4000IU); zinc (15mg); boron (3mg); magnesium glycinate (800mg); melatonin (0.3mg, reduced from 0.6mg in 2022-06) discontinued on 2023-12-08

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  • 3 months later...

So I'm finally at <1mg of amitriptyline. Feels like I'm filling the capsules with dust, but in reality, this is a powerful med. 

Being honest, I did a 3-day experiment of not taking it recently, and while I was able to sleep I'm scared of what is going to happen after I quit entirely

 

Plan right now is to do at least two more tapers until coming off completely, I'm waiting until the winter so I don't have to deal with the extreme weather around here in case of an emergency

 

Things aren't going well really. Still deal with depersonalization, fatigue. I'm starting to believe others that perphenazine is the culprit. That one I plan to make a two year taper tops 

 

I had to return to the office, wasn't able to handle it, I also blame myself for trying to lift weights again, pretty sure that fried my energies.

Found a remote job (with a pay cut). People at my job panicked, offered me more, with remote most of the time, and I took it.

I feel like crap for doing it, but I was also anxious I wouldn't be able to perform at the other one. Things are extremely easy at my current job due to the decade of experience I have

 

But with the recession looming, I guess this is the best option

 

If the amitriptyline drop doesn't works, I'm willing to throw the towel and move with my parents to take an extended vacation to see if that might help

 

2007-2018 25mg-50mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, 500mg Valproic Acid

Nov 2018-February 2019 quetiapine, mirtazapine, pregabaline, estazolam, agomelatine, levomepromazine, trazodone, sulpiride

March 2019 - 37.5mg Amitriptyline, 4mg Perphenazine, waiting to tapper off slowly

February 2023 - Finished taper

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  • Moderator Emeritus
13 hours ago, anytriptaline said:

I also blame myself for trying to lift weights again, pretty sure that fried my energies.

 

Other members say that when they do too much exercise it makes their symptoms worse.

 

exercise-do-more-do-less-do-nothing-what-worked-for-you

 

 

* NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA *

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED:  (6 year taper)      0mg Pristiq  on 13th November 2021

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021   LAST DOSE 0.0025mg

Post 0 updates start here    My tapering program     My Intro (goes to tapering graph)

 VIDEO:   Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management

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