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Giulietta

Hello Sunny,

 

Thank you for stopping by with the kind message. I just visited your thread and looks like we are doing much the same. ;)

 

9 hours ago, sunnysideup69 said:

Hope you are doing okay in these challenging times.

 

I'm trying to keep calm and adjust in a constantly changing world. Every time there is a new 'expectation' set - and I to some extent  compensate in acceptance - something new happens.  It seems like all of these happenings are not small - but big.

 

I am self-isolating and we have been told to do so for weeks.  The roads here are empty. Like you, I have been able to get outside. It is so important!

 

9 hours ago, sunnysideup69 said:

I have a bit of an uptick in anxiety symptoms, noticing I'm a bit shaky generally, to be honest....you know , those odd body twitches and jerks? Ugh.

 

I have been having a lot of muscle spasms, particularly blephorasms.  Do you have them?  Sleep has been improving except for 2 bad nights.

 

9 hours ago, sunnysideup69 said:

to look after the most vulnerable kids who are still coming to school.Don't quite know how that will pan out, which is also anxiety-provoking.

 

I thought all the schools were closed down? Behind aroundn others - esp. kids is anxiety provoking. I you don't have to go to work. I feel bad for all the health care workers and say a special prayer for them.

 

9 hours ago, sunnysideup69 said:

I'm watching the news but also setting limits as to how much of it I watch.

 

The virus and WD are  temporary.  I am thinking positively and see as little of the news as possible.   Chloroquine and azyrothmycin  is being used in NYC and shown to be effective. So this is a positive.

 

Hugs to you and hope things going OK with your family.

 

G.

 

 

 

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Giulietta

Hello all -

 

Just a quick post with something I found in today's NY Times (my free article this month!) about tips for coping with isolation.  See below.

 

I Spent a Year in Space, and I Have Tips on Isolation to Share

Take it from someone who couldn’t: Go outside.

By Scott Kelly

Mr. Kelly is a retired NASA astronaut who spent nearly a year on the International Space Station.

March 21, 2020; New York Times

Scott Kelly inside a Soyuz simulator at the Gagarin Cosmonaut Training Center in Star City, Russia, in preparation for travel to the International Space Station.Credit...Bill Ingalls/NASA

Being stuck at home can be challenging. When I lived on the International Space Station for nearly a year, it wasn’t easy. When I went to sleep, I was at work. When I woke up, I was still at work. Flying in space is probably the only job you absolutely cannot quit.

But I learned some things during my time up there that I’d like to share — because they are about to come in handy again, as we all confine ourselves at home to help stop the spread of the coronavirus. Here are a few tips on living in isolation, from someone who has been there.

Follow a schedule

On the space station, my time was scheduled tightly, from the moment I woke up to when I went to sleep. Sometimes this involved a spacewalk that could last up to eight hours; other times, it involved a five-minute task, like checking on the experimental flowers I was growing in space. You will find maintaining a plan will help you and your family adjust to a different work and home life environment. When I returned to Earth, I missed the structure it provided and found it hard to live without.

But pace yourself

When you are living and working in the same place for days on end, work can have a way of taking over everything if you let it. Living in space, I deliberately paced myself because I knew I was in it for the long haul — just like we all are today. Take time for fun activities: I met up with crewmates for movie nights, complete with snacks, and binge-watched all of “Game of Thrones” — twice.

And don’t forget to include in your schedule a consistent bedtime. NASA scientists closely study astronauts’ sleep when we are in space, and they have found that quality of sleep relates to cognition, mood, and interpersonal relations — all essential to getting through a mission in space or a quarantine at home.

Go outside

One of the things I missed most while living in space was being able to go outside and experience nature. After being confined to a small space for months, I actually started to crave nature — the color green, the smell of fresh dirt, and the feel of warm sun on my face. That flower experiment became more important to me than I could have ever imagined. My colleagues liked to play a recording of Earth sounds, like birds and rustling trees, and even mosquitoes, over and over. It brought me back to earth. (Although occasionally I found myself swatting my ears at the mosquitoes. )

For an astronaut, going outside is a dangerous undertaking that requires days of preparation, so I appreciate that in our current predicament, I can step outside any time I want for a walk or a hike — no spacesuit needed. Research has shown that spending time in nature is beneficial for our mental and physical health, as is exercise. You don’t need to work out two and a half hours a day, as astronauts on the space station do, but getting moving once a day should be part of your quarantine schedule (just stay at least six feet away from others).

You need a hobby

When you are confined in a small space you need an outlet that isn’t work or maintaining your environment.

Some people are surprised to learn I brought books with me to space. The quiet and absorption you can find in a physical book — one that doesn’t ping you with notifications or tempt you to open a new tab — is priceless. Many small bookstores are currently offering curbside pickup or home delivery service, which means you can support a local business while also cultivating some much-needed unplugged time.

You can also practice an instrument (I just bought a digital guitar trainer online), try a craft, or make some art. Astronauts take time for all of these while in space. (Remember Canadian astronaut Chris Hadfield’s famous cover of David Bowie’s Space Oddity?)

Keep a journal

NASA has been studying the effects of isolation on humans for decades, and one surprising finding they have made is the value of keeping a journal. Throughout my yearlong mission, I took the time to write about my experiences almost every day. If you find yourself just chronicling the days’ events (which, under the circumstances, might get repetitive) instead try describing what you are experiencing through your five senses or write about memories. Even if you don’t wind up writing a book based on your journal like I did, writing about your days will help put your experiences in perspective and let you look back later on what this unique time in history has meant.

Take time to connect

Even with all the responsibilities of serving as commander of a space station, I never missed the chance to have a videoconference with family and friends. Scientists have found that isolation is damaging not only to our mental health, but to our physical health as well, especially our immune systems. Technology makes it easier than ever to keep in touch, so it’s worth making time to connect with someone every day — it might actually help you fight off viruses.

Listen to experts

I’ve found that most problems aren’t rocket science, but when they are rocket science, you should ask a rocket scientist. Living in space taught me a lot about the importance of trusting the advice of people who knew more than I did about their subjects, whether it was science, engineering, medicine, or the design of the incredibly complex space station that was keeping me alive.

Especially in a challenging moment like the one we are living through now, we have to seek out knowledge from those who know the most about it and listen to them. Social media and other poorly vetted sources can be transmitters of misinformation just as handshakes transmit viruses, so we have to make a point of seeking out reputable sources of facts, like the World Health Organization and the Johns Hopkins Coronavirus Resource Center.

We are all connected

Seen from space, the Earth has no borders. The spread of the coronavirus is showing us that what we share is much more powerful than what keeps us apart, for better or for worse. All people are inescapably interconnected, and the more we can come together to solve our problems, the better off we will all be.

One of the side effects of seeing Earth from a the perspective of space, at least for me, is feeling more compassion for others. As helpless as we may feel stuck inside our homes, there are always things we can do — I’ve seen people reading to children via videoconference, donating their time and dollars to charities online, and running errands for elderly or immuno-compromised neighbors. The benefits for the volunteer are just as great as for those helped.

I’ve seen humans work together to prevail over some of the toughest challenges imaginable, and I know we can prevail over this one if we all do our part and work together as a team.

Oh, and wash your hands — often.

Scott Kelly is a retired NASA astronaut who spent nearly a year on the International Space Station.

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Frogie
3 hours ago, Giulietta said:

Chloroquine and azyrothmycin  is being used in NYC and shown to be effective. So this is a positive.

I don’t want to burst your bubble, but my daughter in law and a very good friend of mine are both nurses. They have been testing it for months and it is not working like they had hoped. This is a virus and antibiotics don’t treat viruses 😢
 

I limit myself to looking online at the news for my state (no tv news) to once a day. In the evening, when they post the most recent news.
 

Hopefully they will find something soon😊 In the meantime, wash your hands and stay calm. It’s going to work out❤️

 

Take care,

 Frogie xx

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Giulietta

Hello all,

I am still hopping along on my 1 bead of duloxetine (11 weeks).  See below the symptom synopsis for more...

The gemini scale, etc. arrived! @Gridley I posted thoughts/questions about my bead beneath....

Symptom synopsis

The past 2 weeks physical WD profile has improved, particularly  the muscle pain/cramping/weakness and imbalance. Continuing: muscle twitching, blepharospasm, chest pounding, intermittent anxiety and insomnia, word recall and memory. Same with vision acuity which is intermittently bad (i..e, struggling to read esp. the computer screen).  Blood pressure has increased so I have re-instituted lisinopril.

The final bead - revisited

I would really like to stop the duloxetine  bead. Tried this last Monday and multiple WD seemed to return around 1.  I restarted the bead and began to feel better.  Seems it could have been the bead.

My body was looking for the duloxetine. Even .2 mg. ??

At some point I will have to get off the last bead. I read the 'when to jump to 0' and there is no good answer unless I missed something (always possible!).

Does one experience intense WD symptoms (as I did one week ago) when jumping to 0?  How long do such symptoms last? Does one grin and bear it?

I wonder if I stop the bead after tapering off clonazepam (or during the taper) I will be in a worse position. I think my body will still be looking for .2 mg of this compound.

Hugs to you all

G
 

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Giulietta
1 hour ago, Frogie said:

They have been testing it for months and it is not working like they had hoped. This is a virus and antibiotics don’t treat viruses 😢

 

Hi Frogie,

 

What disappointing news they have not seen more positive outcomes.  Even if it is not a magic bullet I hope it can help some people.  And a better solution will be found.  You are right - things will work out. Until then, we keep washing.

 

Chloroquine I undertood to be an antimalarial (treats parasites?) and not an anti-biotic per se.

 

big hugs,

G.

 

 

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Altostrata

Giuletta, looks like you might as well hop along on one bead for a while.

 

1 hour ago, Giulietta said:

The past 2 weeks physical WD profile has improved, particularly  the muscle pain/cramping/weakness and imbalance.

 

This is good. Can we work on improving your sleep? You've done the blackout windows, sleep mask, etc.?

 

Frogie, please take discussion about coronavirus to Off-Topic or the topic that's in Symptoms and Self-Care, leave the Introduction topics for tracking progress in tapering and withdrawal syndrome.

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Giulietta
9 hours ago, Altostrata said:

This is good. Can we work on improving your sleep? You've done the blackout windows, sleep mask, etc.?

 

Hello Alto

 

Thank you for your comments. Been doing the sleep mask, could do better on the meditation and relaxation. I will document nightly hours.

 

For hopping along - am I better off to not to start the clonazepam taper - even though I have a supply potentially limited to 6 mos?

 

[I have to go from 1 mg to 0 mg after several  years].

 

Thanks - and haven't stopped thinking about your offer/request.

 

With thanks & kind regards,

G.

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Gridley
Posted (edited)
15 hours ago, Giulietta said:

The final bead - revisited

 

I would really like to stop the duloxetine  bead. Tried this last Monday and multiple WD seemed to return around 1.  I restarted the bead and began to feel better.  Seems it could have been the bead.

 

My body was looking for the duloxetine. Even .2 mg. ??

 

At some point I will have to get off the last bead. I read the 'when to jump to 0' and there is no good answer unless I missed something (always possible!).

 

Does one experience intense WD symptoms (as I did one week ago) when jumping to 0?  How long do such symptoms last? Does one grin and bear it?

 

I wonder if I stop the bead after tapering off clonazepam (or during the taper) I will be in a worse position. I think my body will still be looking for .2 mg of this compound.

 

Hugs to you all

 

G
 

 

G.,

 

I do think your body was looking for the Duloxetine, even the 0.2mg.  Your system had a rough go with the Duloxetine taper/CT with the liquid and the guesswork required to approximate a dose with the beads.  

 

There's no real answer for you in the "when to jump to zero" because you really have very little choice.  It's either a 100% drop to zero or the possibility of skipping days.  My reason for advising to stay on the Duloxetine was that (maybe) if you stayed on it through your benzo taper, you might give your system time to stabilize on it.  Of course, it's also possible you'll in less good shape than now after the benzo taper if you're limited to a 6-month taper.

 

To me the strongest argument for staying on the Duloxetine while you do your benzo taper is that you have a very limited supply of Clonazepam (and lots, I assume, of Duloxetine).  Your doctor may very well give you another benzo prescription but we don't don't know if the drug will be available.  If you go off the Duloxetine now and have the same reaction you did before--and there's every reason to think you will--you would likely want to stabilize before starting the benzo taper, using up precious time (and drugs).

 

As so often, it's a rock and a hard place situation, but those are my thoughts.

Edited by Gridley
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Gridley
31 minutes ago, Gridley said:

Does one experience intense WD symptoms (as I did one week ago) when jumping to 0?  How long do such symptoms last? Does one grin and bear it?

 

I forgot to answer this one.

 

Generally, if the taper has been smooth and the jumping off point low enough, the WD symptoms shouldn't be intense like yours were.  As far as how long they last, there's no way to say.  Re grin and bear it, that's the old question: you can reinstate, as you did or you can tough it out.  Then you're back to question #1 about how long does it last, which we just don't know.

 

Rhiannon fairly recently jumped off one of her drugs (I forgot which one) I think at a pretty low dose, experienced some bad WD, and reinstated at lower than her jump-off point and got relief.  

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Altostrata

Some people go off one bead by taking the larger beads first, then the medium-size, then the smallest. Will this work for you?

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Giulietta
3 hours ago, Gridley said:

If you go off the Duloxetine now and have the same reaction you did before--and there's every reason to think you will--you would likely want to stabilize before starting the benzo taper, using up precious time (and drugs).

 

I may have a strong reaction when dropping the bead again and lose time to restabilize before starting a clonazepam taper.  I will proceed with Altostrata's suggestion below and see how I do. 

 

I still have to start the benzo taper at the same time so I will see how it goes.

 

3 hours ago, Altostrata said:

Some people go off one bead by taking the larger beads first, then the medium-size, then the smallest. Will this work for you?

 

Thank you. This is a great idea. Amongst a few capsules there must be some variation in bead size.

 

5 hours ago, Gridley said:

Of course, it's also possible you'll in less good shape than now after the benzo taper if you're limited to a 6-month taper.

 

A 6 month taper (1 to 0 mgs) would require a 16.7% monthly  decrease -  (4.2, 4.2, 4.2 and 4.1 percent a week....and no holds) - so I think I may be in less good shape as you nicely put it.  🤕 

 

2 hours ago, Gridley said:

Re grin and bear it, that's the old question: you can reinstate, as you did or you can tough it out.  Then you're back to question #1 about how long does it last, which we just don't know.

 

Thank you - so there is no way of knowing. It seems my best hope for a smoother exit to 0 is to find smaller size beads.

 

This really is a vile drug - or maybe insidious is a better descriptor.

 

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Giulietta

 

On 3/23/2020 at 1:52 PM, Gridley said:

Generally, if the taper has been smooth and the jumping off point low enough, the WD symptoms shouldn't be intense like yours were.

 

Hi Gridley,

 

I think I would like to give another try to getting off duloxetine (again). Per Alto's great idea, I did a search for smaller sized beads.

 

The manufacturer had pretty good QC - so the beads are homogeneous. I didn't find many smaller beads - whether what one might consider medium or small.  I hope I have enough without cracking more capsules. Based on what I found in 3 capsules (300 beads)  -

  • 12-14  'medium' sized beads
  • 3 small beads
  • 2 specs/chips

I have had few symptoms to complain of. ;) Thankfully. I seem 'stable.' I believe I have been taking 'normal' / 'standard' sized beads since they are 90% of a capsule.

 

I am planning to start the 'medium' sized beads tomorrow. I had been planning to hold this for 7 days before the final 5.  I wonder if I should try to find more small beads.

 

Thanks

Hug,

G

 

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Gridley
1 hour ago, Giulietta said:

  I wonder if I should try to find more small beads.

I think it would be worthwhile to crack a few more capsules to try to find some smaller beads.  It would be good if you could have an intermediate stage (if possible).  You could hold off a day for this determination  before beginning the taper.

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ShiningLight

Glad you are stable! You are getting sooo close!!! Super exciting!

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Erell

hello dear, 

 

quickly stopping by to give you hugs ❤️

 

Wow, you are getting so close ! Congratulations ! 

 

Don't know if you've seen this, may be interesting for you : It does'nt end at "0"

 

 

 

Take care ❤️

 

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Giulietta
12 hours ago, Gridley said:

try to find some smaller beads.  It would be good if you could have an intermediate stage (if possible).  You could hold off a day for this determination  before beginning the taper.

 

Hi Gridley.

 

Thanks.

 

I don't understand what size bead I should be looking for - perhaps my details below could help clarify?

 

Best I could do are have a total of 4 sizes including what I have been on.

 

I started today what is may be a comparatively smaller size bead.

  • Previous  11 weeks - taking the largest bead size (i.e, unwittingly)  on all days (size D)
  • Last week tried no beads from size D - failed attempt. WD returns in all its @#$$* and decided not to go down that road. Maybe I should have held for 3 days but didn't want to make overall situation worse given need to start 2nd taper drug and maybe starting to stabilize. It was a hard decision. ;)
  • Today (after 12 weeks) - started what I think are the next smaller size beads. (size D - hold for 7 days)
  • Targeted date 12 days from now  - what I think are next size smaller beads (size B)- - hold for 5 days - note this is a suble diifference from size B but best I could do in size reduction
  • Targeted date 17 days from now: 3 or 4 tiniest beads I could find - including 2  chips (size A) - note that this the biggest drop in dose as the 'beads' are really, really small but these are lucky finds
  • Targeted stop  20-21 days if the above goes well (size 0)

Hold for as few weeks as I need to stabilize.

 

Last week and this morning feeling anxious an dhaving auras. Could be general anxiety - which makes everything worse but life can't come to a half because of it. It just makes everything worse.

 

Let me know if my explanation helps and what your thoughts are.

 

After learning more about clonanz/klono I need to be off this first - as you suggrsted - I may likely be in worse shape afer that than I am now.

 

Thanks and hugs,

G.

 

 

 

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Giulietta
8 hours ago, ShiningLight said:

You are getting sooo close!!! Super exciting!

 

4 hours ago, Erell said:

you are getting so close ! Congratulations ! 

 

Don't know if you've seen this, may be interesting for you : It does'nt end at "0"

 

 

Hello both lovelies,

 

thank you for visiting and encouraging. Making any drop is exciting AND scary at the same time (duh ;) ). I read BrassMonkey's article - and with the bead formula - it's more difficult.

 

I hope you are both well and WD and anxiety is not making lives much more difficult. I need to meditate and color more. ;)

 

Hugs to you both,

G

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Gridley
Posted (edited)
36 minutes ago, Giulietta said:

he next smaller size beads. (size D - hold for 7 days)

I thought D was the largest size. 

 

Other than that, this looks like a good plan except that you might hold a little longer in each stage.

Edited by Gridley

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Giulietta
23 hours ago, Giulietta said:
  • Previous  11 weeks - taking the largest bead size (i.e, unwittingly)  on all days (size D)
  • Last week tried no beads from size D - failed attempt. WD returns in all its @#$$* and decided not to go down that road. Maybe I should have held for 3 days but didn't want to make overall situation worse given need to start 2nd taper drug and maybe starting to stabilize. It was a hard decision. ;)
  • Today (after 12 weeks) - started what I think are the next smaller size beads. (size D - hold for 7 days)
  • Targeted date 12 days from now  - what I think are next size smaller beads (size B)- - hold for 5 days - note this is a suble diifference from size B but best I could do in size reduction
  • Targeted date 17 days from now: 3 or 4 tiniest beads I could find - including 2  chips (size A) - note that this the biggest drop in dose as the 'beads' are really, really small but these are lucky finds
  • Targeted stop  20-21 days if the above goes well (size 0)

 

This was meant to be posted yesterday and I forget to press send.

 

 

Apologies for my error and confusion. Math and logic weren't too good.  ;) Holding longer would be nice - esp at the lowest size. I will see how I feel. If after 7 days at the lowest dose I can still updse at that or a lower dose

 

Even these 3 size drops mean relatively big % each time. I will try to find a few more of this size before my 19 day discontinuation. 

 

Today I started size C (medium) and will hold for 7 days - depending on how I feel.

After those 7-12  days  - I start size B (small) and hold about 7 days

Finally - in 14-16 days  I start the 5 smallest (tiny) beads (size A) - 3 small and 2 chips.

 

So this looks like a total of 19 days. Then stabilize. I am trying nto set expectations but I need to get off this poison at some point. 

 

I really don't want to taper off this after I've tapered klonpin - which looks like one of the most difficult drugs to get off of.

 

Thanks for your support and advice through all of this.

 

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Giulietta

Hello everyone,

 

Morning off to a rock start, starting while I was lying in bed before I even got up.  I am trying to get off one damned bead.

 

That being said - here is a recent update -  Comments and advice welcome.

 

I re-read @brassmonkey's informative work on jumping to 0 as well as @Altostrata's work on you can't taper to 0 (if I have the title right).

 

On 3/23/2020 at 2:18 PM, Altostrata said:

Some people go off one bead by taking the larger beads first, then the medium-size, then the smallest. Will this work for you?

 

Excellent one, which I tried to implement yesterday. I thought I was trying  right thing but maybe I implemented it improperly.

 

3/15:

  • Stopped my 1 bead after 8 week. WD returns at noonish. Take 1 bead ~ 1 and feel better.

3/26:

  • Took a smaller bead (next smallest to the normal size bead).  Note that finding medium, smaller and tiniest / specs was really difficult - even hard to tell the difference bet. sizes even with a magnifying glass.
  • Tinnitus in evening. Ruminating during day about beads. Memory worse (moreso than usual).  Wondering what the tinnitus is about as it is worse (sometimes the case).

3/27:

  • Before getting up @ 6.45 a.m. (this is less than 24 hours after 3/26's bead) - feeling dizzy/HA abruptlky. Get up and imbalance, stiff knees, sore thighs, HA. T
    • Dystonia. Headturns, tinnitus and dry mouth. Auras. Feeling depressed about this. Will I get off this without more acute WD?
  • Took same size bead as 3/26.  about 7.30. Start to feel better about 8.30. Legs still bit sore and tinnitus.
    • As I mentioned above - wondering if I will hve to suffer at some point with the bead  the start of the August '2019 problems that lasted about 6 mos?).
    • Why  would holding longer at the 'normal' or 'larger' size bead help? Will I suffer at every drop? Won't my body be looking for the rest of the mgai at some point?
    •  As this stuff is dynamite I don't want to mess around.
1 minute ago, Giulietta said:
18 hours ago, brassmonkey said:

Symptoms are triggered by fluctuations in the blood serum concentration of the drug.  Because of the drugs, the body has been modified to require their presence at a certain level to function "correctly". If the concentration drops below that level the body reacts badly in the form of symptoms.

 

 

One thought I had is alternating days with 'regular' size beads, 'medium' size, 'regular size', etc.

 

What else can I do? Do I repeat this until tomorrow?

 

Thanks everyone and sorry to revisit this. I know everyone's busy.

 

Big hug to everyone who is suffering and /or advising...

 

Giuilietta

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Gridley
1 hour ago, Giulietta said:

 

One thought I had is alternating days with 'regular' size beads, 'medium' size, 'regular size', etc.

G.,

Your system is obviously very sensitized.  I think going down larger to medium to small is better than alternating regular to medium.  Holds would be good if you have enough same-sized beads to make holds practicable.

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Altostrata

Take the largest beads until you run out, then the medium beads, etc. It's okay to take just one bead for a good while.

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Rosetta

Thinking of you, Giulietta!  All my love, Rosetta

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Giulietta
21 hours ago, Gridley said:

I think going down larger to medium to small is better than alternating regular to medium.  Holds would be good if you have enough same-sized beads to make holds practicable.

 

20 hours ago, Altostrata said:

Take the largest beads until you run out, then the medium beads, etc. It's okay to take just one bead for a good while.

 

Thanks Gridley and Alto. I went back to the usual (biggest) bead size this morning.

 

I have been  trying to understand  why/how such an apparently minute change in physical  bead size would apparently increase WD symptoms (and what this may may mean for dose and thus evenually leaping to 0).

 

I finally have some thoughts and wonder if I am correct. If someone could respond when they have a chance I would appreciate it. 

 

Does the physical size of the bead correlate to the dose? 

  • The image (footer)  shows the smaller bead  on the left (next size down from the size of most of the beads in the capsule - on the right)  to be about 25% smaller.
  • If physical size translates into dosage, might a 25%  smaller bead be about .15 mg (.2 - 25%)? 
    • If all this is true - then getting to the smallest bead is about -25%  (.11 mg). From my smallest bead to 0 is a decrease of 100%.  
    • Given the huge % of these jumps and leap to 0 it may hurt every step of the way. ☹️

Sorry for the dumb question(s) and again thank you.

 

G.

______________________

 

My beads  - smaller on left is what I took previous 2 days.

 

921602205_ScreenShot2020-03-28at8_04_24AM.png.8ef0af050b660118b44ec952e2e2b74c.png


 

 

 

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Giulietta
11 hours ago, Rosetta said:

Thinking of you, Giulietta!  All my love, Rosetta

 

Hello Rosetta - than you for remembering me. I hope you are feeling well, family and everyone are fine.  Hugs. G.

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Giulietta

Quick update on how I am doing

 

  • Tried the 'regular' sized bead yesterday morning hoping to experience relief. Experienced a lot of anxiety, a panic attack, auras, tingling on head, and I don't know what else - GI, issues, derealization. Body tremors.
  • Awoke this morning with tremors and body shaking about 4. Lasted about 1.5 hours.
  • This morning experienced derealization, anxiety, chest pounding. Took a bead (not sure of size). Symptoms a bit better after taking the bead or if it is the placebo effect.
  • Sleep has been poor the past 5 days.
  • Going to start a resarch/writing project - or do my best. Maybe help keep me focusd on something that is uplifting. 

 

Question to visitors...

When people reinstate - whether a 'small' dose or not - does the brain get reinforced/ reconditioned to fight WD more every time you try to stop to quit? As the braink / body re- learns it needs the drug? And then stopping the drug is more difficult? 

 

Hugs andhope you are all managing.  Will pop on a few threads later. Been on already 2 hours...where does the time fly....

 

G. :)

 

 

 

 

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Altostrata
On 3/28/2020 at 7:59 AM, Giulietta said:

I have been  trying to understand  why/how such an apparently minute change in physical  bead size would apparently increase WD symptoms (and what this may may mean for dose and thus evenually leaping to 0).

 

We don't know the answer. All we know is that some people have been successful with this method. The logical conclusion is that the larger beads contain more active ingredient.

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Giulietta
4 hours ago, Altostrata said:

All we know is that some people have been successful with this method. The logical conclusion is that the larger beads contain more active ingredient.

 

Thank you, Alto. I am trying this method and I am counting on it working for me too.

 

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Giulietta

Hello all,

 

I am hopping along on my bead and had 2 relatively good days until a panic attack last night. I think it was an external trigger. I had been busy working on a project  - trying to fix a shelf (low chance of success but I did it!) - got lightheaded, weak in the thighs, light headed, locked knees,etc., etc. Even getting under the weighted blanked, etc. the tremors would not abate. Put the dog on the bed and hoped he would be more comfort and not piddle. ;) Finally fell asleep. Awoke at 4.  Poor sleep every night and tinnitus every night - in part stress related.

 

That being said I did some organization in my living quarters yesterday and have more to do. Organizing anything seems like a waste of time but without it I really spin wheels looking for stuff. Organizing makes it a tad easier and less frustrating. So if anyone has any tips send them my way. ;) If you need any ideas with anything let me know and I'll see how I can help.

 

I have to today look at my scale to plan a clon taper. I wish I could have started this last year even though I was in a more acute state of PWD.

 

Glad it's a sunny day here but cold. I hope everyone has a nice day.  

 

Enjoy this beautiful day and be kind to everyone!

 

Big hugs to everyone.

 

g

 

 

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Giulietta

Hello all - and update on Sat a.m. 4/4/2020

 

I have spent little time on SA as I am completely distracted by the world situation and safety of my family (and me). 

 

All in all since Sun 3/29 there has been a lot of anxiety, cortisol spikes, awakening about 4 a.m., body tremors and jitteryness, tinnitus and one night with additional symptoms and trying to resist a panic attack earlier this week. 

 

I believe these WD symptoms may be triggered by the external, extraordinary  and prolonged situation and related thoughts and feelings about the future and safety.

 

3/31: AM: Anxiety; PM: Feel awful. Tinnitys and L ear pain/TMJ, Tremors, jittery, dizziness, lightheadness, dystonia, bloat, I feel completely out of place. A lot of anxiety. Really feel awful. Awakened once.

4/1: Awake at 4. Generally OK until 4. Physical symptoms from 4-6.30: nausea, dystonia, muscle tension, weak legs.  Then after 7: tinnitis, body tremors, despair. Tremors lasted most of the evening until bed at 9-9.30.

4/2: Awaken @ 4.30. PM: Jitters and tremors intermittet from 8 until bed.. Tinnitis Chest pressure

4/3: Awaken @ 5. PM: Body tremors, and jitteryness. Tinnitis.Chest pressure

 

I found it hard to think positively - even though the driving emotions did not serve me. At least I was cognizant of that.  I also hae trouble meditating, etc.

 

 

 

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