Giulietta

[Giulietta]

Hello AuntiBea,

 

Thank you for stopping by my thread for a visit!  I am grateful for your thinking of me and appreciating the unique (somewhat unique) situation I am in. I may be one of the only people on this website who has taken liquid cymbalta before and who has shaky hands and poor control with my hands. 🤣  Words cannot describe my gratitude for all the mods and contributors on this site. @Gridley has been with me since my first visit.

 

3 hours ago, AuntieBea said:

I don’t understand most of it, but I do understand it enough to appreciate how knowledgeable the moderators (and lots of other folks as well) are on this forum. It’s a wonder, really!

 

This is well said. I don't undestand most of it either though I try to - and in time I may become more knowledgeable to pass what I know onto others. They should be teaching at medical schools...

 

3 hours ago, AuntieBea said:

I was reading Brassmonkey’s long post explaining everything to you.

 

I am thinking I should paste BrassMonkey's @brassmonkey  messsages to me so others can easily find it. He spent a lot of time writing it and the information is indispensable.

 

Everyone's situation here is difficult and in unique ways. Yours is no less challenging. The WD is such an imposition of the lives of us all. i am glad I was able to get to church this morning. I rewwally look forward to going.

 

Be well and a big hug

Giuilietta

[Gridley]

37 minutes ago, Guilietta said:

Did some more research

Good work, G.

 

I don't know if this little tool would be helpful in loading the beads in the capsule (or whether it would be more trouble).

Anyway, you can check it out on Amazon.  It's a Chemglass brand 6.5" stainless steel spatula, spoon style, made by cglifesciences.com.  The spatula is about 2" long X 3/4" wide with a long handle.  

[Giulietta]

10 minutes ago, Gridley said:

Anyway, you can check it out on Amazon.  It's a Chemglass brand 6.5" stainless steel spatula, spoon style, made by cglifesciences.com.  The spatula is about 2" long X 3/4" wide with a long handle.  

 

Thanks, Gridley.  I will look this up later today.

 

I have to run to the grocery store for apple sauce. In the pouring rain. 

 

I so appreciate your help.

 

 

[Gridley]

1 minute ago, Guilietta said:

apple sauce

I thought you weren't going to do the applesauce.

[Giulietta]

59 minutes ago, Gridley said:

I thought you weren't going to do the applesauce.

 

Until my capsules arrive I have to do applesauce. They shoud arrive on Wednesday.   I don't particularly like applesauce so I will do my best with the capsules.

[sunnysideup69]

Hey Guilietta, 

Dropping by to see how you are. I was going to say good morning, but then realised for you, it isn't...it's 530am here in London, clocks went back an hour on Saturday and it's cold and dark.

Pumpkin season is here. Last night, there were fireworks going off as it's the Hindu festival of Diwali. I love fireworks, they really cheer me up.

 

Have read a little of your thread and see you are also on an SNRI.... following with interest.It looks like you are taking 0.4mg worth of beads...is that right? Must be really fiddly to have to faff around with all those beads ( wondering about this as Venlafaxine bead wrestling beckons in the future for me 🙄) I guess you also have to get the same brand of your antidepressant every time, how does that work? Here in the UK, with electronic prescriptions, we call through to the GP or the prescribing chemist....I guess I could request a particular brand. 

Sending love from cold, dark London.

[Giulietta]

Hello Sunnyside @sunnysideup69 !

 

How did you do managing the time change with your meds?

 

There's a move afood (again) to eliminate this twice a year imposition on Americans (and their pets - who have to adjust to eating schedules!).

 

It's dark and cold here by 6 p.m. After daylight (savings?) it will be more darker earlier at night and we get a very little extra daylight in the morning. Weather is cloudy and damp here today.  We've had a run of sunny days so I"m not complaining - although I never take sunny weather for granted. I lived in Southern California and I never tired of the sun and warm weather.

 

11 hours ago, sunnysideup69 said:

Pumpkin season is here. Last night, there were fireworks going off as it's the Hindu festival of Diwali. I love fireworks,

 

can you pick your own pumpkins? We have foliage and pumpkins here now too - and pumpkin fields that advertise 'PYOP' (pick your own pumpkin) and we can purchase by weight.  I wonder if you like Indian food. I like their bread but not keen on most of the rest.

 

About beads - well - Sunday was my first experience with this. From a 20 mg capsule - .4 mg = 2 beads. There are an average of 100 beads in my manufacturers capsule. It is a squirrley thing to do.  Getting the capsule open and keeping the beads from movingall over was difficult. I used a black t-shirt to put them on and @brassmonkey gave me some excellent suggestions. Until my big gelatin capsules arrive - I will put them in applesauce which lilly says is OK. Still - I don't think it is the best option.

 

11 hours ago, sunnysideup69 said:

I guess you also have to get the same brand of your antidepressant every time, how does that work?

 

In my state - it varies by the state you live in - the MD can check off to keep the generic brand. If the pharmacy can obtain it - that is wonderful. Otherwise you have to accept waht they give you.

 

I haven't been to London in a while. I know it's changed since I was last there (I think 2013?).

 

Giulietta

 

 

[Giulietta]

Logs

October 24

4 a.m. Awaken with tinnitus. Bad leg cramp. Restless sleep until getting up.

5.45 a.m. Get up. Leg still sore.

7 a.m. Breakfasted and meds (dulox liquid, gaba 300 mg, clonaz .5 mg, crestor 10 mg, lisinopril 2.5 mg) & supplements

7 a.m. Anehedonia and fatigue. Dizziness. Changed plans not to go out.

8.15 a.m. Pushed myself to walk on the treadmill.

10 a.m. Anhedonia lingering.

10 a.m. Snack with sugar and decaf. No improvement.

11.30 a.m. - Despair and anger and sad.

12 lunch

1 gabapentin 300 mg

2.30 dulox

4.00 Anhedonia and emotions some relief

6 dinner and lamotrigine 600 ER

7 tinnitis – rest of evening.

9 gabapentin 400 mg, clonazepam 1.5 mg
10p.m.  bed

 

Sun Oct 27 - first day on .4 mg ER - beads

7.00 a.m. Breakfasted and meds (gaba 300 mg, clonaz .5 mg, crestor 10 mg, lisinopril 2.5 mg) & supplement

7.00 a.m. Anxiety – maybe around first day on beads

8.00 a.m. Dulox .4 mg (2 beads)

8.30 a.m. Legs weak, stiff, imbalance. Light headed. 9,30 church in jeopardy if symptoms snot resolved

12 Lunch

1 p.m. gabapentin 300 mg

2 p.m. auras

4.00 p.m.  Anxiety

6 p.m. dinner and lamotrigine

7 p.m. brain zaps. tinnitis – rest of evening.

7 p.m. lots of energy this evening until bed

9 p.m.  gabapentin 400 mg, clonazepam 1.5 mg
12 a.m. bed.
3 a.m. Awaken & back to sleep
4 a.m. Awaken & back to sleep
5.30 a.m. awaken to alarm. Up at 6

Hope I sleep much better tonight.

[AuntieBea]

Good morning Guilietta!

 

I’m thinking of you...wondering how you are doing today. Also wondering about your appointment yesterday with the MD.

My fingers are crossed hoping you got supported the way that you need....

 

Just a quick hello for now. 

Be well, Guilietta! ❤️AuntieBea

 

 

 

 

[Gridley]

21 hours ago, Guilietta said:

Sun Oct 27 - first day on .4 mg ER - beads

 

How is it going so far?

[Giulietta]

Hello Gridley @Gridley

 

Thank you for checking in on me. I have been thinking of how to post an update.

 

Here is an update:

 

Today is day 3 of .4 mg (2 beads). I am still using applesauce as capsule arrival is not until Thursday or Friday. I am still taking my meds in the morning.

 

In addition to the usual later day/evening tinnitis and anxiety - I have experienced:

• Being more 'energized',energetic and alert particularly in the evening (after dinner and until 10 or 11). This is not too dissimlar from when I started duloxetine. This is new.
• What I believe may be cortisol spikes (awakening at 3.30-4 with palpitations, jitters). Is this a cortisol spike?
• Awakening with tinnitis and having in morning. Awakening with tinnitus is more unsual.
• Increased frequency of palpitations - and related 'something' I can't put my finger on. This may have started prior to the .4 mg dose.
• Couldn't get to sleep on Sunday night (about 4.5 hours)  and had it interrupted 2x. This hasn'th appened in a while.
• Hard to walk. Legs stiff (have had this symptoms before) -but twice since dose increase.
• In fact I am experiencing palpitations while writing this but not as bad as in MD's office. No reason to have them or be anxious.

Despair in general about all of this. Will post separately.

 

22 hours ago, Guilietta said:

9 p.m.  gabapentin 400 mg, clonazepam 1.5 mg
12 a.m. bed.
3 a.m. Awaken & back to sleep
4 a.m. Awaken & back to sleep
5.30 a.m. awaken to alarm. Up at 6

 

A social phobia thing or anhedonia? been emergig since the weekend. Even though I have something I have been looking forwrd  to - lurking in the back of my mind is concern about going to an event omorrow where I don't know anyone (but most of them know each other and are subject matters in this field - so I am an outsider, not university faculty, etc.) a drive to get there and cost to park, an unfamiliar commute in the city or subway (I don't know which is worse), etc. I was excited about it at the time - but sometimes as the date nears - I start to conjure reasons not to go. 

 

Palpitations in the MD office awaiting appointment for the duloxetine issue. This is highly  irregular for me. I have been to the hospital many times. I am more sensitive to palpitations because they have been much more frequent and are uncomfortable.

 

Sorry this is so long, Gridley.

 

Thanks,

Giulietta

[Giulietta]

Hello AuntieBea @AuntieBea

 

Thank you for visiting me! As you can see from my thread I have been having more symptoms than I would like.

 

MD appointment went OK. MD was supportive. Beads are going OK. Having a bit of despair and anhedonia today. Eating tnoo many sweets.  I feel depressed this afternoon and very fatigued. Having auras now. Felt OK this morning but things ahve gone down hill. At least I managed to get my dog groomed a bit this morning.

 

@Gridley

 

I will post today's symptoms later today. Want to go tomorrow if I am feeling OK. I honestly would feel embarrassed / ashamed if I could not make it. One of the persons I know I have told I would attend.

 

So feeling crummy. Would help if the sun ncame out.

 

Hugs and hope all is well with you. Don't mean to complain.

 

Giulietta

 

 

 

[Gridley]

13 minutes ago, Guilietta said:

Beads are going OK.

That is fantastic.  It's also great the the doctor is supportive.

 

I'm sure your dog is looking very spiffy.

 

I guess you know that sugar ramps up anxiety.

 

 

[Gridley]

23 minutes ago, Guilietta said:

Is this a cortisol spike?

Very likely so.

 

I'm very happy you've made the jump to beads and that things are going well.  

[Rhiannon]

Hello G, just checking in. Looks like you've started on the beads, good job! Hang in there. Don't be too worried about ups and downs in symptoms at this point, you were already up and down before. It can be easy to get too laser-focused on little wobbles that don't really mean anything.

 

Probably good to keep up with your daily symptom log, but don't overanalyze it, give it a week or two to see if any new patterns are emerging and whether you are overall doing better.

 

Hugs to you!

[Giulietta]

2 hours ago, Gridley said:

It's also great the the doctor is supportive.

 

I'm sure your dog is looking very spiffy.

 

I guess you know that sugar ramps up anxiety.

 

Hello Gridley @Gridley

 

I am glad I am on beads at last.

 

That the MD is supportive is something for which I am very thankful. He has expressed an interest (maybe knows this already)  understanding all of this as well - which I am particularly grateful for. I am having my RX refilled - and pharmacy can order the same generic. I hope it is a tier 1 or 2 so it doesn't impact coverage for lamotrigine ER 😕 Gotta love big pharma and insurance companies.

 

My little chum is looking smart - and can now see better.

 

2 hours ago, Gridley said:

I guess you know that sugar ramps up anxiety.

 

Thank you for reminding me of this. I will redouble my efforts to minimize added sugar.  🥐

 

Hello Rhiannon @Rhiannon

 

2 hours ago, Rhiannon said:

Don't be too worried about ups and downs in symptoms at this point, you were already up and down before.

 

Thank you for the reminder. I am trying not to be distracted by symptoms. Even though they may be 'new' as WD symptoms- and even though I know this - it is not easy to roll with them and brush them aside. 

 

2 hours ago, Rhiannon said:

Probably good to keep up with your daily symptom log, but don't overanalyze it, give it a week or two to see if any new patterns are emerging and whether you are overall doing better.

 

Agree. I would like at some point to stop doing logging symptoms. Do SA members (whether veterans or newbies like me) continue to log unless they are changing doses?

 

 

Thanks to you both,

 

Hugs and best wishes 🌹

 

Giuilietta

 

 

[Giulietta]

3 hours ago, Gridley said:

I guess you know that sugar ramps up anxiety.

 

I rethought this while I was exercising - which is a daily activity.

 

I usually have 1 tsp added sugar (other than fruits for example) a day total (in coffee or decaf). 

 

Would this affect anxiety? 

 

I know that low blood sugar can.

 

Thanks,

G

 

 

[Gridley]

21 minutes ago, Guilietta said:

Would this affect anxiety? 

It very well could.  Some of us, myself included, can't even have orange juice because of the high sugar content.

[Giulietta]

4 minutes ago, Gridley said:

Some of us, myself included, can't even have orange juice because of the high sugar content.

 

Interesting!

 

This is a bummer if you like oranges. Most fruits have a lot of sugar in them.

[Gridley]

51 minutes ago, Guilietta said:

fruits

 

Don't shoot the messenger, but grapefruit is also a food to be wary of.  I'm thinking in particular of your Clonazepam.

 

http://www.antidepressantsfacts.com/grapefruit-juice-and-drugs-dont-mix.htm

 

[Giulietta]

1 hour ago, Gridley said:

but grapefruit is also a food to be wary of.  I

 

I hadn't been aware of grapefruit and clonazepam. Thank you - I will read the article. Although I don't care for grapefruit - I am aware that it interacts with a wide variety of medications including meds to treat cardiac disease.

 

I hope there are no contraindications with avocados.

 

I hope you have a good night, thanks again.

[Gridley]

35 minutes ago, Guilietta said:

avocados.

I am an avocado fiend.  

[Cocopuffz17]

3 minutes ago, Gridley said:

I am an avocado fiend.  

soooo good. No sugar and tons of healthy fats!

[Giulietta]

I eat them plain they are so good. 1/4 a day...

 

They make every sandwich more interesting

 

[AuntieBea]

Hi Guilietta,

 

Glad to hear your doctor was supportive. That’s  a relief and really good news. Not to be expected either!

 

Any increase in symptoms is always so discouraging. I really appreciate what Rhiannon said about the little “wobbles”. Sometimes the symptoms feel so intense and disturbing though that it’s hard to know if this is in fact a wobble...or what...yeah,

that’s when it goes into despair and hopelessness for me. So I think I’ll just try to stay focused on the wobbles.😋

 

20 hours ago, Rhiannon said:

Don't be too worried about ups and downs in symptoms at this point, you were already up and down before. It can be easy to get too laser-focused on little wobbles that don't really mean anything.

 

I’m enjoying all the conversation on your thread about grapefruit, avocados, oranges, etc. I dearly love avocados...grew up with them in my Northern California childhood. I find it hard to get a good one here in Upstate New York. Maybe you have a good way of picking them out??? 

13 hours ago, Gridley said:

I am an avocado fiend.  

Gridley is so fortunate to live close to the source. I have to confess to being quite envious....😋

 

I hope you have a decrease in symptoms today Guilietta. I am thinking of you.

—AuntieBea

[Giulietta]

Hello Gridley  @Gridley

 

Hope you are well today and not consumed too many avocados. When you have a moment -

 

Would you advise in simple terms where / how I can share a 14 page document on Executive Function and related issues and coping with deficts in this area. I went through a workshop on this and documented it carefully. I'd like to share with others - @Emma75 -new to SA also faces this thorny issue. I would like it to be easy to find for SA members. 

 

(As a personal aside - EF deficits are one of the causes of my trouble with beads.   Even if people do not have all EF issues per se - bits of it may apply to them. I really hate to use it as an 'excuse' but it is the cause of a lot of grief.)

 

No rush. You are so busy helping others with high priorities.

 

Thanks, Gridly, as always.

 

 

[Erell]

Hi sweet Friend !

I didn't know you had a dog ! So Nice! Would love To live with a dog 🤗

 

Well, as always,  Rhiannon's wisdom is Nice To read, right ?

 

I think of you ❤

[sunnysideup69]

On 10/28/2019 at 5:03 PM, Guilietta said:

 

I haven't been to London in a while. I know it's changed since I was last there (I think 2013?).

 

Wow yes, it is constantly changing. There's a lot of 'gentrification' of certain areas going on, which is a bit sad really as then everywhere becomes very bland and boring.

There are places where you can pick your own pumpkins...but I'm lazy, and just go select from the Supermarket....Also cold/dark here, I also wish we could abolish the silly 'time change' thing....

 

How are you doing? Been reading about your taper xxx

[Giulietta]

Coucou Erell,

 

My dog is a good little companion.  Taking proper care of them - and giving them plenty of love and attention - is a big responsibility! They depend on us for everything so think about what that means for you and your life before givng one a home.   Be prepared to share your meals wtih them. They are accomplished beggars. 🤣

 

Rhiannon makess thoughtful points about life - the ups and downs - and how they affected her life. Life is rarely fair (I don't know who that is attributed to) and she has had her share of that and more - I'm so sorry for her. She is a gem.

 

Hope you are having a good day my dear friend.

 

Hugs,

Giuilietta🤗

[Giulietta]

19 minutes ago, sunnysideup69 said:

There's a lot of 'gentrification' of certain areas going on, which is a bit sad really as then everywhere becomes very bland and boring.

 

And completely unaffordable. I remember when Hammersmith was up and coming and last I knew it was becoming out of reach unless you had a lot of money.  I love Paul Lewis (is that the name?) store- it's amazing - everything from window dressings to clothing to furniture. Bit pricey of course but it is top notch and amazing to walk through.

 

22 minutes ago, sunnysideup69 said:

just go select from the Supermarket....Also cold/dark here, I also wish we could abolish the silly 'time change' thing....

 

 

Same here. If someone else hadn't picked one up - there wouldn't be one in the house. Long gone are the days of making jack o'lanterns. Doyou do those?

 

Same weather here. I have a sun lamp so I will plug that in for a while this afternoon. I need to get a better one when I can afford. To help with sleep - and make the environment 'warmer' I have replaced my traditional soft white bulbs with amber ones. They are not very bright but make it easier to rest at night.

 

24 minutes ago, sunnysideup69 said:

How are you doing? Been reading about your taper xxx

 

I'm doing OK (touch wood) - anedonia goes up and down within anhour - it's really quite amazing. It's like night and day. 

 

Today I pick up my 00 capsules so I don't have to use applesauce to swallow the beads.

 

Thanks for popping by my thread sunnysideup!

 

Hugs,

Giuilietta🤗

 

 

[Giulietta]

Hello AuntieBea,

 

Thank you for stopping by. Funny you ask about obtaining avocados. They are usually hard as rocks at the grocery store - but cheapest price there. Picking up to find the softest one is the challenge - but generally - we buy in anticipation of eating in a 2-3 days - we leave them at room temperture until they ripen.

 

2 hours ago, AuntieBea said:

Sometimes the symptoms feel so intense and disturbing though that it’s hard to know if this is in fact a wobble...or what...yeah,

 

Well put. You are such an adroit writer - you and Rhiannon. Sometimes the symptoms are so intense and some incapacitating- they are disturbing and extended that it is hard to accept they are wobbles.

 

How are you doing, AuntieBea? Has your stability increased and medication dosages settled for the moment?

 

Giulietta

[Rosetta]

Hang in there Guiletta.  I'll be off line mostly or completely for two months starting tonight.  You can do this! Never give up!

[Giulietta]

Happy Halloween to all of you Trick or Treaters 🎃

 

By way of a brief update for the past two days (this is my 4th day on .4 mg beads).

 

For today I have an update on symtoms and also mention an issue that causes me a lot of anxiety: food.

 

5.30 a.m. Awoke to alarm after sleeping through the night (7 hours of sleep. hip hip hooray!)

6 a.m. Breakfast and meds (.4 mg, dulox, 300 mg gabapentin, 2.5 mg lisinopril, .5 mg clonazepam, crestor)

6.30 - 9 a.m. Feeling fine.

 

Note re: 6-9: In spite of an arduous and lengthy commute, difficulty parking, etc. - I managed to get to an event full of strangers on time and without having considerable anxiety, heart palpitations, and GI problems. Why was this? I would have expected this.

 

1.30 pm - anxiety and auras (mostly driven I think by finding a place to grab a bite so I could take medication

2 p.m. Lunch and 300 mg gabapentin

3.30 Back home.

4 pm Anxiety,  heart palpitations, IBD & Ruminations.  Trigger issues  associated with this below are recurring. need help please. Telling myself not to be'thinky' and practice CBD

5.45 p.m. Dinner and 600 mg lamotrigine ER

6.30 p.m. Anxiety and palpitations continues but not like 4 pm - 5.30 pm.

6.45 p.m. Tinnitis added.

Rest of night TBD.

 

Trouble with short term memory and foggy thinking throughout the day.

 

Trigger issues for this afternoon from 4-6ish are recurrent triggers and as follows:

• Dinner. When to eat and what to eat. Diet and exercise for weight management/BG, etc. cause anxiety.
• Entering my living space/bedroom
• I had missed my morning exercise since I wasn't at home - and don't exercise later because it interferes with sleep.

I don't know how to resolve them ☹️ and would appreciate very much advice.  Will make a separate post about these. 

 

Thanks,

Giuilietta

 

[Giulietta]

3 hours ago, Rosetta said:

Hang in there Guiletta.  I'll be off line mostly or completely for two months starting tonight.  You can do this! Never give up!

 

Hello Rosetta,

 

Thank you for stopping by my thread and the words of encouragement.

 

I hope you are very well.

 

G.

[Giulietta]

Just posted an interesting article about actions people can take to improve cognitive functioning. Note that most if not all are already posted on SA.

 

I posted this article as the research it is based on indicates success stories of the positive impact of these actions to help with memory, for example.

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/21747-the-link-between-diet-exercise-and-alzheimer’s/

 

[Giulietta]

Why would I be having more chest pain? This may feel like heart burn or a dull ache?

 

This is different that palpitations which I have experienced much more frequently in the past 2 weeks. I understand that the palpitations are associated with anxiety and WD.

 

Thanks,

G.