Bigbird: Paxil / paroxetine withdrawal

[Gridley]

Just now, Bigbird said:

How do I cope?

 

You'll make it through this.  I know it's hard to focus on self-soothing when you feel bad, but that's really the best thing to do.  Take a look at those links I gave you a while back.  They can really help.  And don't forget prayer to ask for strength.  

 

Things always look worse after a bad night's sleep.  It seems like forever when you're in the middle it, but you will feel better.

It's going to be up and down for a while.  As you begin to stabilize on the reinstatement, symptoms will be less intense.  

 

Distractions are very important to divert your attention from yourself.  Youtubes, TV, whatever you can manage.  

 

You will make it.

[Bigbird]

Thank you so much for your support, it means so much. I’ll go check out those links. 🤗 

[Bigbird]

Gridley, sorry to bother you again. My son says that I’m talking in a self defeatist attitude. What are some things that I can say to myself to get through my bad days? Also should I force myself to be more busy? I’m sorry, I’m just feeling so low and exhausted it’s hard to think of ways to get through these difficult days. Thanks again for taking your time to help me.

[ChessieCat]

Gridley (twice) and I (so 3 times in all) have both given you links to non drug coping techniques.  We provide these links because it important for members to learn and use non drug coping to get through the discomfort.

[Bigbird]

Thanks Chessiecat, I’m sorry, it’s just been a difficult day, thanks again.

[Cocopuffz17]

2 hours ago, Bigbird said:

Gridley, sorry to bother you again. My son says that I’m talking in a self defeatist attitude. What are some things that I can say to myself to get through my bad days? Also should I force myself to be more busy? I’m sorry, I’m just feeling so low and exhausted it’s hard to think of ways to get through these difficult days. Thanks again for taking your time to help me.

For me personally, I would of gave up as I did before without this site. I find success stories very comforting and positive, give them a read! Especially when their dose/length on drug are longer than mine. You will get through this. Mindset helps a lot! I know how it feels to be beaten down and have literally no energy! You got this! 

[Bigbird]

2 minutes ago, Cocopuffz17 said:

For me personally, I would of gave up as I did before without this site. I find success stories very comforting and positive, give them a read! Especially when their dose/length on drug are longer than mine. You will get through this. Mindset helps a lot! I know how it feels to be beaten down and have literally no energy! You got this! 

Thank you so much Cocopuffz17,  It’s exhausting and I know I get myself all worked up, I need to work on my mindset. Thank you for your encouragement, I’m so grateful.😊

[Cocopuffz17]

22 minutes ago, Bigbird said:

Thank you so much Cocopuffz17,  It’s exhausting and I know I get myself all worked up, I need to work on my mindset. Thank you for your encouragement, I’m so grateful.😊

You are welcome! It’s very easy to get yourself all worked up, you need to recognize it and work through it. You got it and you are welcome! 

[Bigbird]

Good morning Gridley I hope that your well, 

i had a better day yesterday trying to keep myself busy and stay positive. My sleep still isn’t great, I awakened anxious during the night and slept very lightly after the awakening. I have a counselling appointment this afternoon and I have anxiety about driving on the highway so my daughter will drive me.  The thought of leaving my house to do normal things is causing me anxiety. Driving on the large highway, grocery store, going to a dentist appointment etc. is really creating anxiety. Those things just feel too much for me at the moment. I don’t want to become agoraphobic, but isn’t what I’m feeling just from a frazzled nervous system? So wouldn’t forcing myself to do things just make things worse? I looked on the site to find any information and didn’t find much on advice on what to do. What do you suggest I do , I find your advice very helpful. Thank you.

[Gridley]

1 hour ago, Bigbird said:

What do you suggest I do

 

I've always been a bit agoraphobic and withdrawal has definitely heightened that.  WD does that, takes existing tendencies and exacerbates them.

 

I find that when I have to do something (even drive down to the little village from the mountain where I live) can ramp up my anxiety.   I really don't push myself too hard or force myself to do things, but I do try to do a few things.  I try to find a balance.   I'd suggest to find a balance, staying home when you need to and want to (always being kind to yourself) but still doing a few things that aren't too anxiety-producing, if you can. 

[Bigbird]

Hi Gridley, I just came back from a walk with my dogs. My legs feel like jelly and I’m exhausted.

So I find driving to my counselling appointments too much at the moment, so should I only do bare bones necessary things? I don’t feel capable to drive on the freeway, just too stressful. I feel like I need someone to be with me when I go to the store, it’s all overwhelming. Is this normal, will it ease up. I actually feel like I’m never going to get off this drug. I don’t want to be on it, my family says that I’m not myself . I’m so emotional and the lack of sleep I’m sure is contributing to it. I just feel desperate at times. My husband finds it all confusing on how I can be almost fine then not so good. I’m sorry I’m trying to be strong it’s really difficult. So if I’m not up to counselling and anything else, I shouldn’t do it, just make myself do some basic things until this calms down, it should calm down correct? Thanks for your support, I depend on it,  your  really helping me.

[Gridley]

4 minutes ago, Bigbird said:

Is this normal, will it ease up. I actually feel like I’m never going to get off this drug. I don’t want to be on it, my family says that I’m not myself . I’m so emotional and the lack of sleep I’m sure is contributing to it. I just feel desperate at times. My husband finds it all confusing on how I can be almost fine then not so good.

 

Do what you can do.  I wouldn't force myself.  I don't push myself.  Just do the basic things you can do without pressuring yourself.  

 

You could tell your husband that feeling good sometimes, then bad is totally normal in withdrawal.  We call it windows and waves--windows being the good periods, waves the bad.  It can switch back and forth several times a day.

 

 

[Bigbird]

Thanks Gridley, not forcing myself feels relieving. I really appreciate you helping me, I don’t think that I could get through this without support from yourself and others. I love animals and I have two dogs that depend on me for a walk daily. We found a small kitten about two months ago left outside, so now we have one adult cat and now this kitten we’ve named George. He is a handful at times,  and a little too much for me some moments. Too difficult to turn him away.  My young adult children are taking on more responsibility for him because I’m not my normal self.  I’ve read that your a dog lover also. I lost my dog Princess last October,  she almost made it to 15 years old. I miss her so much every day. She was always by my side. Thank you again, your helping me stay strong and I really appreciate it. Hugs 🤗 

[Gridley]

 

25 minutes ago, Bigbird said:

I love animals and I have two dogs that depend on me for a walk daily. We found a small kitten about two months ago

 

Happy to help.

 

I'm glad you've got your little ones to give you comfort and companionship.  

 

Sorry about Princess.  I know you miss her.  

[Bigbird]

Thanks Gridley, I’m sorry that you lost one of your dogs as well. Have a great day, appreciate your support .😊

[Bigbird]

Gridley one last question and I’ll leave you be. My sleep issues are not falling asleep but staying asleep. I’ve read the links about insomnia. Besides melatonin do you recommend any supplements that may help with not being able to stay asleep. I believe that the lack of sleep is really making me feel terrible. My legs and feet ache, just generally feeling exhausted. Any ideas on how to stay asleep. Thanks for your help Gridley. 

[Gridley]

51 minutes ago, Bigbird said:

Besides melatonin do you recommend any supplements that may help with not being able to stay asleep.

 

This is a common problem.  The only other suggestion I have except for the melatonin is that you could try a small dose of magnesium when you wake up.  It does have a calming effect and could help.  I do this some nights.  Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.  Keep the dose by your bedside so it's convenient.

[Cocopuffz17]

55 minutes ago, Bigbird said:

Gridley one last question and I’ll leave you be. My sleep issues are not falling asleep but staying asleep. I’ve read the links about insomnia. Besides melatonin do you recommend any supplements that may help with not being able to stay asleep. I believe that the lack of sleep is really making me feel terrible. My legs and feet ache, just generally feeling exhausted. Any ideas on how to stay asleep. Thanks for your help Gridley. 

I also found eating pitaschios helps a lot. They are melatonin rich. I tried it out for myself and found take 6-8 before bed helped me fall asleep easier. 

[Bigbird]

Ok thanks, I take some before I  sleep now, I’ll try a small dose if I can’t go back to sleep. 😊 thanks

[Bigbird]

3 minutes ago, Cocopuffz17 said:

I also found eating pitaschios helps a lot. They are melatonin rich. I tried it out for myself and found take 6-8 before bed helped me fall asleep easier. 

Thanks for the tips cocopuffz17, I appreciate it.

[Bigbird]

Good afternoon Gridley, just and update. I have a good day then a bad day usually, it seems to be the pattern at the moment. I think the bad days are from the nights when I sleep poorly. I wish that I had a better update and that I felt more positive. I’m just not sure that I should feel this terrible. Would an up dose be of any help? Or do I just do my best to get through this time? It’s really difficult on these bad days. Thanks is for your support.

 

[Gridley]

3 hours ago, Bigbird said:

Would an up dose be of any help

 

Since you are having good days and bad days, it seems to be that the current updose is working, and I would be hesitant to risk the gains you've made.  It is normal to feel bad on days after a bad night's sleep.  What you're doing now is stabilizing, which will take some time.  It's important to remember that the goal of updosing isn't to eliminate withdrawal symptoms but rather to make them tolerable,  From what you've written today and in earlier posts, things seem to be going well.  I know you'd like to feel better, but really you're doing great--an updose success story.

 

If ever things take a turn for the worse, we can always talking a small increase, but as I said, my advice would be to hold where you are.

 

You sound so much better than a while back--and that's very encouraging..

[Bigbird]

Thanks Gridley, I’m just feeling really terrible today, yesterday was good. It’s like every other day of good and bad. Probably best to just stick with the same dose. I guess I’m just looking for a quick fix to feel better. It’s hard feeling like I can’t do anything but just get through the day.  Thanks again

[Bigbird]

Hi Gridley, had a not bad day yesterday, last night I tried .5 mg of melatonin and it seemed to help a bit. I have a question. I had to go out alone today and drive in my town and get a haircut. I found it really difficult. I feel so strange in my body and it’s a little unnerving. Will I eventually stabilize at this dose? I’m concerned because I guess my taper was considered too fast, has this messed me up for the long term? Will I stabilize enough that feel like I can do normal activities before I can taper again. Tapering is not even on my mind,  I just want to feel functional. I’ve read other people’s  experiences and of course the negative ones create anxiety, I’m not reading anymore of them, it was from past reading and they have stuck in my mind. Just feeling a little fearful and coping the best that I can. Any words of hope that you can offer me.  Thanks and wishing you a great rest of the day.

[Gridley]

11 minutes ago, Bigbird said:

Any words of hope that you can offer me.

 

I'm glad the melatonin helped.  I'd stick with the 0.5 and see how it does over the next few nights.

 

You did do a rapid taper, which destabilized you.  But you have not messed yourself up for the long term.  You updosed in time and the updose is working, which is great.  It can take several months, sometimes six or more, to stabilize after an updose.  When you do stabilize--which you will--you will be able to do normal things and function.  

 

Don't even worry about tapering at this point.  Let's just get you stabilized on your current Paxil dose.  You're doing great.  It may not sound great, good days interspersed with bad days, but you're doing very well.

[Bigbird]

Thanks Gridley, no I’m not even considering tapering at the moment. I just want to feel functional. So may people must end up in my situation when you think that you are tapering slowly and then you realize you aren’t.  So frustrating, I know that I’m healing  and that I will stabilize on this dose. I just need to be patient and do my best with the not so good days. Thanks for your support, it’s so helpful. Hope that your well yourself. Wishing you healing and happiness.

[Bigbird]

Hi Gridley, just letting you know things are pretty much the same, good days and bad days. My lack of sleep is stressing me out the most. I fall asleep but then awaken and can’t fall back to sleep. I lay awake the rest of the time feeling upset and anxious and my mind going on and on about things. I’ve checked the site for information on insomnia, but I don’t know how to stop myself from fearing dealing with insomnia and it creates a vicious cycle. Do you have any suggestions on how I can calm my mind, so I feel less anxious about the insomnia. I hope your doing well yourself. Thanks 

[Gridley]

 

1 hour ago, Bigbird said:

Do you have any suggestions on how I can calm my mind, so I feel less anxious about the insomnia.

 

I'm sorry you're suffering with this.  You're right, it is a vicious circle.  You might go back through this Claire Weekes link.  She's really the gold standard on dealing with anxiety and fear.

 

Audio:  How to Recover from Anxiety - Dr Claire Weekes

 

Here are some other techniques that other members have found helpful in dealing with anxiety.

 

 

Ways to cope with daily anxiety
 
Rebuilding self-confidence, accepting anxiety

 

Dealing With Emotional Spirals 

 

Withdrawal causing intrusive or repetitive thoughts, rumination, and increased panic?

Easing your way into meditation for a stressed-out nervous system
 
Good links for anxiety/worry

Pranayama Breathing for Anxiety and Depression
 

Take some time and look through these suggestions and see which you think might help.  One technique that worked for me is the legs-on-wall yoga pose.  If you can't get your legs up on the wall, you can put them in a chair.

 

10 minute Restorative Yoga for Relaxation | Up the wall

 

I'm guessing this is a longtime symptom for you, and learning to use some of these techniques could mark a real change in your life.  

 

Also, are you taking magnesium?  It's calming and has helped many members.  Just start at a low dose to see how it works for you.  Magnesium glycerinate is a good form.  Some members dissolve the tablet in water and sip it throughout the day.  Or you could take a small amount, like 50mg, several times a day.

 

Magnesium, nature's calcium channel blocker 

 

Also you could try epsom salt baths, which are calming. 

 

What I'm talking about here is a multi-pronged approach to calm yourself in general, which will stand you in good stead not only in withdrawal but in your life.

 

I hope this helps.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Bigbird]

Thank you Gridley, I’m on my way home from our cottage. That was very helpful. I’ll look through the links that you sent me when I get home. I have to realize that insomnia is only temporary and my anxiety is making it much worse. I need to learn anxiety coping skills that I will need for a lifetime. Thank you again, wishing you healing . P.S Yes I am using magnesium, I take it before bed and when I get up.

[Giulietta]

On 8/22/2019 at 9:25 AM, Gridley said:

've always been a bit agoraphobic and withdrawal has definitely heightened that.  WD does that, takes existing tendencies and exacerbates them.

 

I find that when I have to do something (even drive down to the little village from the mountain where I live) can ramp up my anxiety.  

 

Hi Gridley. Have you thought about going out and just sitting in your car? Maybe take things one step at a time? Then sit in with engine running? Another day back down end of driveway? Many years ago - a friend was going through panic and agoraphobia. I remember her therapist gave her this as a way to overcome this and it helped her tremendously.

 

I also tend to keep to myself and after the CT approach last year - I was struck with

panic and agoraphobia. Driving to the grocer's (10 min) was stressful. Walking around the store was overwhelming. 

 

Telling my closest friend about this helped - and I felt safe (sort of) being away from home with her. 

[Gridley]

3 minutes ago, Guilietta said:

I remember her therapist gave her this as a way to overcome this and it helped her tremendously.

 

That's a good idea, G.  Many thanks.

[Giulietta]

5 hours ago, Bigbird said:

My lack of sleep is stressing me out the most. I fall asleep but then awaken and can’t fall back to sleep. I

 

Hello Bigbird. Sorry about your insomnia. I have this too - and I know we have a lot of company. And it can be anxiety provoking. Here are some things to try, which were recommended to me and I am trying them out myself now.

 

Try deep breaths through your nose not mouth- and focus on the breath - when you awaken during the night.

 

A watched pot never  boils.....

• From 7 - bedtime think positive thoughts only. This is tough on many nights - but I do my best.
• Do a mind dump - whether they are 'worries' or not. In fact - I was advised to keep a worry book - and when worries creep into my mind - I jot them down in the book - and say 'ok, i know you are there - and will deal with you later.' With me it is a matter of documenting them so I don't forget them. It frees one's mind.
• From 7 pm to bedtime - no blue light. Make every effort not to use your computer. Even with blue-light blocking glasses (I have large pair I put on over my regular eyeglasses) it is still discouraged.
• Wear blue-light blocking glasses when watching TV.
• I replaced the lightbulbs in my bedroom (where I spend my evening hours generally) with amber light bulbs. They are not nearly as bright. So much better. If you read, you'll want a small bright light.
• Invest in a weighted blanket if you can. I found one for $64 (Luna on amazon) which helps. I have a 15# based on my body weight - but I need something that is heavier
• Practice mindfulness - 20 minutes. It is not necessarily medidation - but being present and focusing on one thing. I like a relaxing sound too, like listrening to sound of the ocean (obviously recorded) and chimes (also obviously recorded).
• Get as much exercise as you can. Physical exercise / physical fatigue really helps.

Relaxing, the weighted blanked, blocking the blue-light, and physical fatigue help for sure. One thing I now tell myself is that I can't wait to go to bed and lie under the weighted blanket!

 

[Bigbird]

Thanks Guilietta, I’m also going to try a you tube video called the body scan. Thanks again for your suggestions and support, it’s really appreciated.

[Giulietta]

44 minutes ago, Bigbird said:

Thanks Guilietta, I’m also going to try a you tube video called the body scan.

 

Thanks for the referral. I may look it up too.

 

[Bigbird]

By Jon Kabat-Zinn

[Giulietta]

Gridley - did I see in a previous post that you are traveling to Spain?

 

G.