thelegend Posted January 24, 2020 Author Share Posted January 24, 2020 2 hours ago, Tom37 said: Your window was a clear sign things are changing so while it didn’t last long try to see it as a positive. thanks Tom! I really appreciate your comments. I do try to see it as a positive, though I had some good windows while on vacation in the summer and thought that meant stability was coming soon...that has certainly not been the case, so I am skeptical that this window will really mean anything different. April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
Tom37 Posted January 24, 2020 Share Posted January 24, 2020 If I had a dollar for every time I thought stability was around the corner I wouldn’t have to work again....it’s just so slow and frustrating. It’s hard too because you want to be optimistic and you want to have hope but you keep getting pushed back down again to the point where you have moments where you wonder if it’s worth it to keep on going. You question everything but somehow you carry on. Maybe working on acceptance will help you for now. At my baseline I can accept the situation but come a wave it’s hard work and struggle a lot with it. 1 20mg Lexapro 2007 10mg Lexapro 2012 Started tapering approx (October 2017) 12 months ago from 10mg to 9mg then 8 then 7 then 6 then 5 then 4 then 3. Held for approx 4 to 6 weeks min on each reduction. Hit severe symptoms (started 7th Nov) after dropping to 3mg. Dropped to 3mg approx 22nd October. Back to 4mg (7th November) and stabilising. Current symptoms started 23rd November 2018 Used diazepam (2018) 10mg 10th Nov, 5mg 11th Nov, 2.5mg 12 Nov, 2mg 13th Nov. Used diazepam 10mg 24th Nov, 7.5 25th Nov and 5mg 26th November 2018 Link to comment
sunnysideup69 Posted January 25, 2020 Share Posted January 25, 2020 Hey @thelegend, have faith! Recovery is coming, but wow, it's a tedious up and down process. It's a really good sign that you've had some windows and they will begin to get longer again. Honestly. From May 2018 to beginning of December 2019, I just didn't think I'd improve, but I have. Hang on in there. Thanks for your encouraging words on my thread January 2008 to April 2015 Citalopram 20mg to 5mg, reducing in 50 per cent leaps. Jumped off at 5mg March 2016 used MDMA triggered setback April 2016 Citalopram 10mg October 2016 cut to 5mg, May 2017 cut to 2.5mg May 2018 used MDMA triggered setback June 2018 Citalopram 2.5mg up to 10mg, then back to 5mg July/ August 2018 7.5mg, then 10mg June 2019 updosed to 20mg Citalopram August 2019 cold switch to Venlafaxine 75mg XR Supplements; 1100mg fish oil daily; also 100mg Magnesium Glycinate. Tried Vagifem 10mcg from mid May 2021 to mid June 2021; caused depression, so stopped. Link to comment
thelegend Posted January 27, 2020 Author Share Posted January 27, 2020 Another Monday morning, another huge cortisol dump! I am not sure what to do anymore. I just feel I can’t keep doing this! April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
Lynnardgirl Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 thelegend So sorry to hear about your early cortisol Mon morning! I thought my morning was going better but got to work and my anxiety is through the roof! Not going away ugh Maybe one day you and I can say we are healed and loving life ! Soon just have to believe ! My prayers and thoughts with you always 1997 regular Effexor 150 mg2016-2017 up dosage to 225 tried several times to taper no luck fast taper Back on panic attacks anxiety Insomnia 2017 doing ok after a year but then insomia doctor put me onTrazodone was on Trazodone for 6 months or longer did a fast taper getting panic attacks 2018 Doctor switched me to Effexor XR an reduced my dose to 225 - down to 150 felt worse went back on regular Effexor Venlafaxine 2018 taper again, To fast tapered down to 112.5 from 150 take half twice a day 56.25 Link to comment
thelegend Posted January 28, 2020 Author Share Posted January 28, 2020 15 hours ago, Lynnardgirl said: thelegend So sorry to hear about your early cortisol Mon morning! I thought my morning was going better but got to work and my anxiety is through the roof! Not going away ugh Maybe one day you and I can say we are healed and loving life ! Soon just have to believe ! My prayers and thoughts with you always thank you for your prayers. Thant means a lot. I thought you felt like you were stabilizing, is that not the case anymore? April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
Lynnardgirl Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 2 minutes ago, thelegend said: thank you for your prayers. Thant means a lot. I thought you felt like you were stabilizing, is that not the case anymore? I thought I was,but this wave has been the worse yet! 1997 regular Effexor 150 mg2016-2017 up dosage to 225 tried several times to taper no luck fast taper Back on panic attacks anxiety Insomnia 2017 doing ok after a year but then insomia doctor put me onTrazodone was on Trazodone for 6 months or longer did a fast taper getting panic attacks 2018 Doctor switched me to Effexor XR an reduced my dose to 225 - down to 150 felt worse went back on regular Effexor Venlafaxine 2018 taper again, To fast tapered down to 112.5 from 150 take half twice a day 56.25 Link to comment
thelegend Posted January 28, 2020 Author Share Posted January 28, 2020 1 hour ago, Lynnardgirl said: I thought I was,but this wave has been the worse yet! I am so sorry, I will be praying for you. Why have we not gotten any better with all this holding? Shouldn’t we be slowly getting better? April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
Lynnardgirl Posted January 28, 2020 Share Posted January 28, 2020 2 hours ago, thelegend said: I am so sorry, I will be praying for you. Why have we not gotten any better with all this holding? Shouldn’t we be slowly getting better? It seems that way doesn’t it! We just have to have faith and know we will heal ! One day at a time ! My Prayers always with you 1997 regular Effexor 150 mg2016-2017 up dosage to 225 tried several times to taper no luck fast taper Back on panic attacks anxiety Insomnia 2017 doing ok after a year but then insomia doctor put me onTrazodone was on Trazodone for 6 months or longer did a fast taper getting panic attacks 2018 Doctor switched me to Effexor XR an reduced my dose to 225 - down to 150 felt worse went back on regular Effexor Venlafaxine 2018 taper again, To fast tapered down to 112.5 from 150 take half twice a day 56.25 Link to comment
thelegend Posted February 5, 2020 Author Share Posted February 5, 2020 I need some help and encouragement guys. 9 months into a hold and I am just not getting any better. What is the deal? Will this nightmare ever end? Anxiety is constant and relentless and I don’t know if I can keep doing it! April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
thelegend Posted February 5, 2020 Author Share Posted February 5, 2020 Monthly Update Symptoms: Anxiety: Still very much around, maybe bad as ever. Morning Cortisol Awakenings: Still very much around, maybe more mild? Burning Eyes - still hanging around, though not as bad, especially in the last week. IBS: Much better than 9 months ago. Sometimes I think it is gone, but then it comes back. Burning Arms: Gone for the most part, was really bad at one point. Shaking: Still around, though not as bad as the beginning. Nightly Windows: Anxiety calms down at night, but these were more pronounced a month or two ago. April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
Moderator Frogie Posted February 5, 2020 Moderator Share Posted February 5, 2020 2 minutes ago, thelegend said: Monthly Update Symptoms: Anxiety: Still very much around, maybe bad as ever. Morning Cortisol Awakenings: Still very much around, maybe more mild? Burning Eyes - still hanging around, though not as bad, especially in the last week. IBS: Much better than 9 months ago. Sometimes I think it is gone, but then it comes back. Burning Arms: Gone for the most part, was really bad at one point. Shaking: Still around, though not as bad as the beginning. Nightly Windows: Anxiety calms down at night, but these were more pronounced a month or two ago. Hi Legend: It looks like some of your symptoms are milder than they were 9 months ago. That’s great. I had A LOT of symptoms when tapering my Lexapro. But 4 years later I’m 10 months off. Now I have extremely high anxiety tapering off Xanax. But that’s to be expected. I am here to tell you just hold tight, although I’m not a mod. I hope you start seeing more improvements soon. I always had/have to tell myself look how far I’ve come, not where I was. You’re going to make it😊 Good luck🤞🏻 Take care, Frogie xx PREVIOUS medications and discontinuations: Have been on medications since 1996. Valium, Gabapentin, Lamictal, Prilosec and Zantac from 2000 to 2015 with a fast taper by a psychiatrist. Liquid Lexapro Nov, 2016 to 31-March, 2019 Lexapro free!!! (total Lexapro taper was 4 years-started with pill form) ---CURRENT MEDICATIONS:Supplements:Milk Thistle, Metamucil, Magnesium Citrate, Vitamin D3, Levothyroxine 25mcg, Vitamin C, Krill oil. Xanax 1mg 3x day June, 2000 to 19-September, 2020 Went from .150 grams (average weight of 1 Xanax) 3x day to .003 grams 3x day. April 1, 2021 went back on 1mg a day. Started tapering May 19, 2023. July 28, 2023-approximately .87mg. Dr. fast tapered me at the end and realized he messed up. Prescribe it again and I am doing "slower than a turtle" taper. 19-September, 2020 Xanax free!!! (total Xanax taper was 15-1/2 months-1-June, 2019-19-September, 2020) I am not a medical professional. The suggestions I make are based on personal experience. Link to comment
Terry Posted February 5, 2020 Share Posted February 5, 2020 12 minutes ago, Frogie said: Now I have extremely high anxiety tapering off Xanax. But that’s to be expected. Hi Frogie. I won't be tapering xanax for a while yet, but your comment about anxiety has me worried. Do you divide your doses to prevent interdose withdrawal? 2007 - 2008 Paxil and Klonopin 2008 - 2012 Mirtazapine following CT from Klonopin and Paxil. 2012 Unsuccessful taper of mirtazapine; reinstated. 7/2013 - 1/2014 Successfully tapered mirtazapine from 7.5 mg to 0.00. Sertraline (Zoloft) Taper Aug 4, 2017 - July 18, 2021 - Current dose 0.00 Alprazolam (Xanax) July 19, 2017 - Nov 15, 2021 - 0.25 mg. Began 10% taper Nov 16, 2021 - 0.25 Jan 11, 2022 - 0.203; Jan 13, 2023 - 0.0499; Jan 21, 2024 - 0.0137; Mar 17, 2024 - 0.0092; Taper is 96% complete. Link to comment
Moderator Frogie Posted February 5, 2020 Moderator Share Posted February 5, 2020 12 minutes ago, Terry said: Hi Frogie. I won't be tapering xanax for a while yet, but your comment about anxiety has me worried. Do you divide your doses to prevent interdose withdrawal? Hi, I will answer you over on your page so we don’t have a conversation going on here😊 PREVIOUS medications and discontinuations: Have been on medications since 1996. Valium, Gabapentin, Lamictal, Prilosec and Zantac from 2000 to 2015 with a fast taper by a psychiatrist. Liquid Lexapro Nov, 2016 to 31-March, 2019 Lexapro free!!! (total Lexapro taper was 4 years-started with pill form) ---CURRENT MEDICATIONS:Supplements:Milk Thistle, Metamucil, Magnesium Citrate, Vitamin D3, Levothyroxine 25mcg, Vitamin C, Krill oil. Xanax 1mg 3x day June, 2000 to 19-September, 2020 Went from .150 grams (average weight of 1 Xanax) 3x day to .003 grams 3x day. April 1, 2021 went back on 1mg a day. Started tapering May 19, 2023. July 28, 2023-approximately .87mg. Dr. fast tapered me at the end and realized he messed up. Prescribe it again and I am doing "slower than a turtle" taper. 19-September, 2020 Xanax free!!! (total Xanax taper was 15-1/2 months-1-June, 2019-19-September, 2020) I am not a medical professional. The suggestions I make are based on personal experience. Link to comment
Lynnardgirl Posted February 5, 2020 Share Posted February 5, 2020 Hi Legend Finally getting a break from morning anxiety! It has been over a year holding ! Your time is coming 1997 regular Effexor 150 mg2016-2017 up dosage to 225 tried several times to taper no luck fast taper Back on panic attacks anxiety Insomnia 2017 doing ok after a year but then insomia doctor put me onTrazodone was on Trazodone for 6 months or longer did a fast taper getting panic attacks 2018 Doctor switched me to Effexor XR an reduced my dose to 225 - down to 150 felt worse went back on regular Effexor Venlafaxine 2018 taper again, To fast tapered down to 112.5 from 150 take half twice a day 56.25 Link to comment
thelegend Posted February 5, 2020 Author Share Posted February 5, 2020 19 minutes ago, Lynnardgirl said: Hi Legend Finally getting a break from morning anxiety! It has been over a year holding ! Your time is coming Are you really?!? That is great news! So happy for you! April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
thelegend Posted February 5, 2020 Author Share Posted February 5, 2020 1 hour ago, Frogie said: Hi Legend: It looks like some of your symptoms are milder than they were 9 months ago. That’s great. I had A LOT of symptoms when tapering my Lexapro. But 4 years later I’m 10 months off. Now I have extremely high anxiety tapering off Xanax. But that’s to be expected. I am here to tell you just hold tight, although I’m not a mod. I hope you start seeing more improvements soon. I always had/have to tell myself look how far I’ve come, not where I was. You’re going to make it😊 Good luck🤞🏻 Take care, Frogie xx Yeah there have been some improvements. I guess I really just haven’t seen much improvement in the anxiety, especially in the morning. After 9 months I really thought that would not be the case. Seems nothing I can do but continue to hold, but man it is really hard! April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
Moderator Frogie Posted February 5, 2020 Moderator Share Posted February 5, 2020 27 minutes ago, thelegend said: Yeah there have been some improvements. I guess I really just haven’t seen much improvement in the anxiety, especially in the morning. After 9 months I really thought that would not be the case. Seems nothing I can do but continue to hold, but man it is really hard! It’s very difficult to hold. And very discouraging, but you will get there with the help of the mods and this great site. Take care, Frogie xx PREVIOUS medications and discontinuations: Have been on medications since 1996. Valium, Gabapentin, Lamictal, Prilosec and Zantac from 2000 to 2015 with a fast taper by a psychiatrist. Liquid Lexapro Nov, 2016 to 31-March, 2019 Lexapro free!!! (total Lexapro taper was 4 years-started with pill form) ---CURRENT MEDICATIONS:Supplements:Milk Thistle, Metamucil, Magnesium Citrate, Vitamin D3, Levothyroxine 25mcg, Vitamin C, Krill oil. Xanax 1mg 3x day June, 2000 to 19-September, 2020 Went from .150 grams (average weight of 1 Xanax) 3x day to .003 grams 3x day. April 1, 2021 went back on 1mg a day. Started tapering May 19, 2023. July 28, 2023-approximately .87mg. Dr. fast tapered me at the end and realized he messed up. Prescribe it again and I am doing "slower than a turtle" taper. 19-September, 2020 Xanax free!!! (total Xanax taper was 15-1/2 months-1-June, 2019-19-September, 2020) I am not a medical professional. The suggestions I make are based on personal experience. Link to comment
Giulietta Posted February 5, 2020 Share Posted February 5, 2020 2 hours ago, Frogie said: I always had/have to tell myself look how far I’ve come, not where I was. You’re going to make it😊 Well said, Frogie, even though it's sometimes hard to remember. With the return of symptoms one thinks one isn't getting better. However, as you pointed out - things have improved. You are going to make it. Link to comment
Lynnardgirl Posted February 5, 2020 Share Posted February 5, 2020 3 hours ago, thelegend said: Are you really?!? That is great news! So happy for you! I was having anxiety for the first year and yes Mornings was awful! Hold tight your days are coming ! Mine got worse before it got better ! Thought I was going backwards ! Then it just started to subside! Still have it but not nearly as bad! Your days are coming ok keep faith 1997 regular Effexor 150 mg2016-2017 up dosage to 225 tried several times to taper no luck fast taper Back on panic attacks anxiety Insomnia 2017 doing ok after a year but then insomia doctor put me onTrazodone was on Trazodone for 6 months or longer did a fast taper getting panic attacks 2018 Doctor switched me to Effexor XR an reduced my dose to 225 - down to 150 felt worse went back on regular Effexor Venlafaxine 2018 taper again, To fast tapered down to 112.5 from 150 take half twice a day 56.25 Link to comment
thelegend Posted February 6, 2020 Author Share Posted February 6, 2020 Just not sure what to do, another impossible morning. Anxiety so strong making me sick to my stomach. I just can’t see this ever getting better after so long. Some symptoms have improved, but not the anxiety and cortisol mornings which are by far the worst of the symptoms. They may actually be worse than ever. April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
Lynnardgirl Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 20 minutes ago, thelegend said: Just not sure what to do, another impossible morning. Anxiety so strong making me sick to my stomach. I just can’t see this ever getting better after so long. Some symptoms have improved, but not the anxiety and cortisol mornings which are by far the worst of the symptoms. They may actually be worse than ever. Mine got worse for a few months then started to subside! Yours will too ok’ Get up every morning and say I’m going to have a great day and God is always with me! Say this through out the whole day ! Especially when the anxiety is really bad 1 1997 regular Effexor 150 mg2016-2017 up dosage to 225 tried several times to taper no luck fast taper Back on panic attacks anxiety Insomnia 2017 doing ok after a year but then insomia doctor put me onTrazodone was on Trazodone for 6 months or longer did a fast taper getting panic attacks 2018 Doctor switched me to Effexor XR an reduced my dose to 225 - down to 150 felt worse went back on regular Effexor Venlafaxine 2018 taper again, To fast tapered down to 112.5 from 150 take half twice a day 56.25 Link to comment
Rozon1 Posted February 6, 2020 Share Posted February 6, 2020 Yo @thelegend do the mods continue to tell you to hold? I wonder if it’s time to maybe consider start reducing? Not sure if they’d recommend it but you seem like your symptoms haven’t improved much since 9 months ago. I hope you get bette me man. I’m struggling myself. If you don’t mind me asking, what was your Akathisia symptoms like? Example: 2018 - Started Effexor 37.5 in Janurary of 2018 2019 January, 2nd - Cold Turkeyed from Effexor for 3 days. Reinstated on the third day, then stabilized(It took 3 months to stabilize) 2019 June - I switched from Effexor instant release to Extended Release 37.5 for better tapering. I tapered to 50% in 4 weeks before reinstating my dosage back to 37.5(due to withdrawls). I waited 2 months to stabilize but never did at 37.5 2019 September - continued to taper in to 25% on extended release 2019 October - continued to taper to half of the beads(18.75mg)... WIthdrawls were so bad I tried switching back to the instant release at the same dosage(18.75mg) 2019 November 28th - Discontinued effexor at 18.75 without anymore tapering. 2020 January - Just can't sleep, have constipation, low libido and still lack of full emotion Link to comment
thelegend Posted February 6, 2020 Author Share Posted February 6, 2020 1 hour ago, Rozon1 said: Yo @thelegend do the mods continue to tell you to hold? I wonder if it’s time to maybe consider start reducing? Not sure if they’d recommend it but you seem like your symptoms haven’t improved much since 9 months ago. I hope you get bette me man. I’m struggling myself. If you don’t mind me asking, what was your Akathisia symptoms like? yes I believe the recommendation is to still hold. Apparently it can take even longer than 9 months to stabilize. Am I right @Gridley and @brassmonkey April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Gridley Posted February 6, 2020 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted February 6, 2020 5 minutes ago, thelegend said: it can take even longer than 9 months to stabilize. Yes, it can. I would continue to hold. Gridley Introduction Lexapro 20 mg since 2004. Begin Brassmonkey Slide Taper Jan. 2017. End 2017 year 1 of taper at 9.25mg End 2018 year 2 of taper at 4.1mg End 2019 year 3 of taper at 1.0mg Oct. 30, 2020 Jump to zero from 0.025mg. Current dose: 0.000mg 3 year, 10 month taper is 100% complete. Ativan 1 mg to 1.875mg 1986-2020, two CT's and reinstatements Nov. 2020, 7-week Ativan-Valium crossover to 18.75mg Valium Feb. 2021, begin 10%/4 week taper of 18.75mg Valium End 2021 year 1 of Valium taper at 6mg End 2022 year 2 of Valium taper at 2.75mg End 2023 year 3 of Valium taper at 1mg Jan. 24, 2024: Hold at 1mg and shift to Imipramine taper. Taper is 95% complete. Imipramine 75 mg daily since 1986. Jan.-Sept. 2016 tapered to 14.4mg March 22, 2022: Begin 10%/4 week taper Aug. 5, 2022: hold at 9.5mg and shift to Valium taper Jan. 24, 2024: Resume Imipramine taper. Current dose as of April 1: 6.8mg Taper is 91% complete. Supplements: multiple, quercetin, omega-3, vitamins C, E and D3, magnesium glycinate, probiotics, zinc, melatonin .3mg, iron, serrapeptase, nattokinase I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice but simply information based on my own experience, as well as other members who have survived these drugs. Link to comment
Moderator brassmonkey Posted February 6, 2020 Moderator Share Posted February 6, 2020 It can take an amazingly long time to fully stabilize. Nine months may seem long, but it's not. 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment
thelegend Posted February 7, 2020 Author Share Posted February 7, 2020 5 hours ago, brassmonkey said: It can take an amazingly long time to fully stabilize. Nine months may seem long, but it's not. yeah, I find that very encouraging and discouraging at the same time. Given enough time everyone will stabilize...right? April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
Moderator brassmonkey Posted February 7, 2020 Moderator Share Posted February 7, 2020 Pretty much. 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment
thelegend Posted February 9, 2020 Author Share Posted February 9, 2020 On 2/6/2020 at 10:19 PM, brassmonkey said: Pretty much. well hopefully I am not the weird exception cause I feel like I am sometimes. Morning cortisol dumps and anxiety are by far the hardest to deal with right now. Make everything I have to do in a day so hard. April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
Giulietta Posted February 9, 2020 Share Posted February 9, 2020 I posted something you may find interesting on my thread about mean length of WD symptoms, etc. Link to comment
sunnysideup69 Posted February 10, 2020 Share Posted February 10, 2020 12 hours ago, Guilietta said: I posted something you may find interesting on my thread about mean length of WD symptoms, etc. Ooh I'm gonna look at that, too..... Hello, @thelegend, sorry it's still tough, sending strength and love xxx January 2008 to April 2015 Citalopram 20mg to 5mg, reducing in 50 per cent leaps. Jumped off at 5mg March 2016 used MDMA triggered setback April 2016 Citalopram 10mg October 2016 cut to 5mg, May 2017 cut to 2.5mg May 2018 used MDMA triggered setback June 2018 Citalopram 2.5mg up to 10mg, then back to 5mg July/ August 2018 7.5mg, then 10mg June 2019 updosed to 20mg Citalopram August 2019 cold switch to Venlafaxine 75mg XR Supplements; 1100mg fish oil daily; also 100mg Magnesium Glycinate. Tried Vagifem 10mcg from mid May 2021 to mid June 2021; caused depression, so stopped. Link to comment
Giulietta Posted February 10, 2020 Share Posted February 10, 2020 4 hours ago, sunnysideup69 said: Ooh I'm gonna look at that, too..... I hope you find it somewhat interesting. Link to comment
thelegend Posted February 10, 2020 Author Share Posted February 10, 2020 @Guilietta - interesting stuff. Problem is I have no clue what timeline I am on? Is it the three years since I CTed the Zoloft, the one year since the Lexapro, the 9 months since my reinstatement? I really have no clue what to think at this point. Losing hope I will ever heal to be honest. April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
thelegend Posted February 11, 2020 Author Share Posted February 11, 2020 Sometimes holding seems like the definition of insanity. Doing the same thing for 9 months hoping for different results. I know it is the right thing to do as jumping around on meds is what has caused this, but it is really hard when you just don’t see improvement. April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
Giulietta Posted February 12, 2020 Share Posted February 12, 2020 On 2/10/2020 at 6:03 PM, thelegend said: Problem is I have no clue what timeline I am on? Hi there, I understand what you are saying about the timeline. I don't know how the authors determined the number of weeks based on the 110 posts. It might be a bit subjective. But that doesn't help you (or me). I am also over the mean for SNRIs. 8 hours ago, thelegend said: I know it is the right thing to do as jumping around on meds is what has caused this, but it is really hard when you just don’t see improvement. I understand your feelings 100%. Frogie kindly replied to my post/question on Frogie's off-topic topic and I will take another look at now. 8 hours ago, thelegend said: Sometimes holding seems like the definition of insanity. Doing the same thing for 9 months hoping for different results. Understood. There is also a saying that when you don't know what to do the best thing to do is nothing. I know from experience I will be better served if I don't do anything rash. 😉 I don't know what to do either. One comment/question: when you go to bed - do you have thoughts/dread that may experience cortisol spikes in the morning? Hugs. Link to comment
thelegend Posted February 12, 2020 Author Share Posted February 12, 2020 @Guilietta - not really. When I go to bed I am usually feeling better, but I do know that come Morning it will be bad again so that always sucks. Will I ever get better guys? I am feeling quite hopeless. April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
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