sunnysideup69 Posted May 24, 2020 Share Posted May 24, 2020 On 5/22/2020 at 4:25 PM, thelegend said: thanks, man it is tough to go backwards like this. How are you doing? Getting any better? Hello @thelegend, It is tough to feel like you're going backwards. Hang in there, better days are coming again. You getting any relief in the day at all? January 2008 to April 2015 Citalopram 20mg to 5mg, reducing in 50 per cent leaps. Jumped off at 5mg March 2016 used MDMA triggered setback April 2016 Citalopram 10mg October 2016 cut to 5mg, May 2017 cut to 2.5mg May 2018 used MDMA triggered setback June 2018 Citalopram 2.5mg up to 10mg, then back to 5mg July/ August 2018 7.5mg, then 10mg June 2019 updosed to 20mg Citalopram August 2019 cold switch to Venlafaxine 75mg XR Supplements; 1100mg fish oil daily; also 100mg Magnesium Glycinate. Tried Vagifem 10mcg from mid May 2021 to mid June 2021; caused depression, so stopped. Link to comment
thelegend Posted May 28, 2020 Author Share Posted May 28, 2020 On 5/24/2020 at 12:05 AM, sunnysideup69 said: Hello @thelegend, It is tough to feel like you're going backwards. Hang in there, better days are coming again. You getting any relief in the day at all? wave continues to get worse and worse! I do get a little break at nights, but man 1st thing in the morning again...BAM!! Not sure how much more of this I can take! April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
Lynnardgirl Posted May 28, 2020 Share Posted May 28, 2020 33 minutes ago, thelegend said: wave continues to get worse and worse! I do get a little break at nights, but man 1st thing in the morning again...BAM!! Not sure how much more of this I can take! I think you and I are feeling the same way! Mine is getting worse worse ! I read in the forum that around the 10 /12 months people hit a bad wave worse than any other ones and can last 4-5 weeks! Sounds like that’s what is happening to you ! 1997 regular Effexor 150 mg2016-2017 up dosage to 225 tried several times to taper no luck fast taper Back on panic attacks anxiety Insomnia 2017 doing ok after a year but then insomia doctor put me onTrazodone was on Trazodone for 6 months or longer did a fast taper getting panic attacks 2018 Doctor switched me to Effexor XR an reduced my dose to 225 - down to 150 felt worse went back on regular Effexor Venlafaxine 2018 taper again, To fast tapered down to 112.5 from 150 take half twice a day 56.25 Link to comment
thelegend Posted May 28, 2020 Author Share Posted May 28, 2020 2 hours ago, Lynnardgirl said: I think you and I are feeling the same way! Mine is getting worse worse ! I read in the forum that around the 10 /12 months people hit a bad wave worse than any other ones and can last 4-5 weeks! Sounds like that’s what is happening to you ! yeah that for sure sounds like it! I am so sorry you are struggling too. Know that I am praying for you and that you will get better! I am so so sorry you are going through this, it is absolute hell! April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
Lynnardgirl Posted May 28, 2020 Share Posted May 28, 2020 10 hours ago, thelegend said: yeah that for sure sounds like it! I am so sorry you are struggling too. Know that I am praying for you and that you will get better! I am so so sorry you are going through this, it is absolute hell! We will both get through this! Hell it is Prayers to you my friend ! 1997 regular Effexor 150 mg2016-2017 up dosage to 225 tried several times to taper no luck fast taper Back on panic attacks anxiety Insomnia 2017 doing ok after a year but then insomia doctor put me onTrazodone was on Trazodone for 6 months or longer did a fast taper getting panic attacks 2018 Doctor switched me to Effexor XR an reduced my dose to 225 - down to 150 felt worse went back on regular Effexor Venlafaxine 2018 taper again, To fast tapered down to 112.5 from 150 take half twice a day 56.25 Link to comment
thelegend Posted May 31, 2020 Author Share Posted May 31, 2020 Wave continues, just not getting any better!! Maybe worse? Not sure but I just don’t know what to do, I feel so alone and helpless, I truly thought I was getting better and now I just don’t know what to think! April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
sunnysideup69 Posted May 31, 2020 Share Posted May 31, 2020 Watch this again, it really helps me remind myself of the process.... January 2008 to April 2015 Citalopram 20mg to 5mg, reducing in 50 per cent leaps. Jumped off at 5mg March 2016 used MDMA triggered setback April 2016 Citalopram 10mg October 2016 cut to 5mg, May 2017 cut to 2.5mg May 2018 used MDMA triggered setback June 2018 Citalopram 2.5mg up to 10mg, then back to 5mg July/ August 2018 7.5mg, then 10mg June 2019 updosed to 20mg Citalopram August 2019 cold switch to Venlafaxine 75mg XR Supplements; 1100mg fish oil daily; also 100mg Magnesium Glycinate. Tried Vagifem 10mcg from mid May 2021 to mid June 2021; caused depression, so stopped. Link to comment
thelegend Posted May 31, 2020 Author Share Posted May 31, 2020 13 minutes ago, sunnysideup69 said: Watch this again, it really helps me remind myself of the process.... that is helpful, thanks!! 1 April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
thelegend Posted May 31, 2020 Author Share Posted May 31, 2020 Maybe @Gridleyor @brassmonkeycould weigh in? Like I said, things seemed to be on the right track from mid-March through April. Wasn’t great by any means, but I would say I was 50% better than I was. Now I have been in this bad wave for 3 weeks and it just seems to keep getting worse! 1 April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
Lynnardgirl Posted May 31, 2020 Share Posted May 31, 2020 2 hours ago, thelegend said: Wave continues, just not getting any better!! Maybe worse? Not sure but I just don’t know what to do, I feel so alone and helpless, I truly thought I was getting better and now I just don’t know what to think! I still think you are hitting this bad wave a year out that can last 3-5 weeks! Then you will start seeing improvements ! 1997 regular Effexor 150 mg2016-2017 up dosage to 225 tried several times to taper no luck fast taper Back on panic attacks anxiety Insomnia 2017 doing ok after a year but then insomia doctor put me onTrazodone was on Trazodone for 6 months or longer did a fast taper getting panic attacks 2018 Doctor switched me to Effexor XR an reduced my dose to 225 - down to 150 felt worse went back on regular Effexor Venlafaxine 2018 taper again, To fast tapered down to 112.5 from 150 take half twice a day 56.25 Link to comment
Moderator brassmonkey Posted May 31, 2020 Moderator Share Posted May 31, 2020 That's how waves can go. They hit, build and fade. sometimes they are quick, lasting a few days but sometimes they can be frustratingly long. Three weeks is pretty common, but it could last for several week more. Then again, it could start to resolve tomorrow. There really is no way of telling how long it will last, but they do always clear up. 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment
Edmunds Posted May 31, 2020 Share Posted May 31, 2020 A full year after doing a 3-week taper off Effexor, I hit another wave of aggravated anxiety, derealization, and blurry vision a couple of weeks ago. In addition to SA, I've benefited in terms of my attitude and daily coping from ACT literature, Claire Weekes, Swamy G., Calm, and other sources. Fluoxetine 1997-2014, 2015, 10-40 mg. GAD and DR symptoms returned April 2013. Bupropion 2013-14, 4 mos; Lexapro 2014; Cymbalta 2014. Gabapentin 2014; Mirtazapene 2014. Buspirone 2015. Venlafaxine Dec. 2015 – May 2019, 150 mg, tapered to 0 in 3 weeks, May-June 2019 Bupropion Mar 2017 – July 2019 300 mg, tapered to 0 in 3 weeks, July 2019 Fluoxetine/Prozac May 2019 – present, tapered from 20 mg started Jan 2020, linear 10% every 4 wks.; tapered 6 to 4 mg June, 2, 2020; 4 to 1.8 mg Aug. 26, 2020; updose from 1.8 mg to 2.0 Nov. 16, 2020. Holding at 2.0 mg as of Mar 14,2021. April 14, 2021 updosed to 2.5 mg. D3 2,000 mg; Omega 3 360 EPA/240 DHA; Magnesium Chelate 250 mg; Inositol powder started Nov 12, 2020; Theanine 400 mg; cranial electrotherapy stimulation device, self-treatments started Mar 14, 2021. Link to comment
Lynnardgirl Posted May 31, 2020 Share Posted May 31, 2020 2 hours ago, Edmunds said: A full year after doing a 3-week taper off Effexor, I hit another wave of aggravated anxiety, derealization, and blurry vision a couple of weeks ago. In addition to SA, I've benefited in terms of my attitude and daily coping from ACT literature, Claire Weekes, Swamy G., Calm, and other sources. How long did your wave last?? Pure Hell what we go through ! 1997 regular Effexor 150 mg2016-2017 up dosage to 225 tried several times to taper no luck fast taper Back on panic attacks anxiety Insomnia 2017 doing ok after a year but then insomia doctor put me onTrazodone was on Trazodone for 6 months or longer did a fast taper getting panic attacks 2018 Doctor switched me to Effexor XR an reduced my dose to 225 - down to 150 felt worse went back on regular Effexor Venlafaxine 2018 taper again, To fast tapered down to 112.5 from 150 take half twice a day 56.25 Link to comment
Edmunds Posted May 31, 2020 Share Posted May 31, 2020 This wave is ongoing, but I must say that your symptoms are more severe than mine at this point. My heart goes out to you. Fluoxetine 1997-2014, 2015, 10-40 mg. GAD and DR symptoms returned April 2013. Bupropion 2013-14, 4 mos; Lexapro 2014; Cymbalta 2014. Gabapentin 2014; Mirtazapene 2014. Buspirone 2015. Venlafaxine Dec. 2015 – May 2019, 150 mg, tapered to 0 in 3 weeks, May-June 2019 Bupropion Mar 2017 – July 2019 300 mg, tapered to 0 in 3 weeks, July 2019 Fluoxetine/Prozac May 2019 – present, tapered from 20 mg started Jan 2020, linear 10% every 4 wks.; tapered 6 to 4 mg June, 2, 2020; 4 to 1.8 mg Aug. 26, 2020; updose from 1.8 mg to 2.0 Nov. 16, 2020. Holding at 2.0 mg as of Mar 14,2021. April 14, 2021 updosed to 2.5 mg. D3 2,000 mg; Omega 3 360 EPA/240 DHA; Magnesium Chelate 250 mg; Inositol powder started Nov 12, 2020; Theanine 400 mg; cranial electrotherapy stimulation device, self-treatments started Mar 14, 2021. Link to comment
Lynnardgirl Posted June 1, 2020 Share Posted June 1, 2020 1 hour ago, Edmunds said: This wave is ongoing, but I must say that your symptoms are more severe than mine at this point. My heart goes out to you. These damn waves ! Unbearable 1997 regular Effexor 150 mg2016-2017 up dosage to 225 tried several times to taper no luck fast taper Back on panic attacks anxiety Insomnia 2017 doing ok after a year but then insomia doctor put me onTrazodone was on Trazodone for 6 months or longer did a fast taper getting panic attacks 2018 Doctor switched me to Effexor XR an reduced my dose to 225 - down to 150 felt worse went back on regular Effexor Venlafaxine 2018 taper again, To fast tapered down to 112.5 from 150 take half twice a day 56.25 Link to comment
thelegend Posted June 1, 2020 Author Share Posted June 1, 2020 Well here it goes, not as positive as May’s update as this latest wave has really done a number on me. Monthly Update: Sensitive to sound - slight Sensitive to touch - slight Pins and needles - gone Burning eyes, arms, back, feet - sometimes eyes, I can also feel chest and arms at times, but not to the degree they once were Hyper stimulation - still around, like I am always keyed up Bad sleep - much worse than last month, probably not as bad as the beginning. Waking with cortisal spikes - again, has come back significantly, not as bad as the beginning. Light headedness, or feeling like you are not quite all there - This has been quite prevalent during this wave, probably as bad as ever Massive anxiety - I don’t want to say as bad as ever, but it isn’t far off. IBS - Back every morning, probably as bad as ever! Shaking - can get pretty noticeable at times Sweating - better than it used to be Overall there are still improvements, but I have definitely taken a few steps back from where I was to start off May. Hoping this wave starts to fade soon as this is really hard! April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
Lynnardgirl Posted June 2, 2020 Share Posted June 2, 2020 You are seeing some improvements, this is good! I know it feels like it will never end, but you are healing. My prayers and thoughts with you always 1997 regular Effexor 150 mg2016-2017 up dosage to 225 tried several times to taper no luck fast taper Back on panic attacks anxiety Insomnia 2017 doing ok after a year but then insomia doctor put me onTrazodone was on Trazodone for 6 months or longer did a fast taper getting panic attacks 2018 Doctor switched me to Effexor XR an reduced my dose to 225 - down to 150 felt worse went back on regular Effexor Venlafaxine 2018 taper again, To fast tapered down to 112.5 from 150 take half twice a day 56.25 Link to comment
thelegend Posted June 2, 2020 Author Share Posted June 2, 2020 On 5/31/2020 at 1:01 PM, brassmonkey said: That's how waves can go. They hit, build and fade. sometimes they are quick, lasting a few days but sometimes they can be frustratingly long. Three weeks is pretty common, but it could last for several week more. Then again, it could start to resolve tomorrow. There really is no way of telling how long it will last, but they do always clear up. Thanks Brassmonkey, good to hear from you and try to understand all of this. Should I be worried that I have held steady over a year and still am nowhere near stable? Shouldn’t I be getting to stability but now? I would love to taper off this junk as my whole life has been ruined by this, but I fear I will never be stable. April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
Moderator brassmonkey Posted June 2, 2020 Moderator Share Posted June 2, 2020 It's a total bummer that it's taking so long to happen, but sometimes it just goes that way. We've had a number of members that took over a year to stabilize before they could continue, but it does happen. Even though you are not stabilized there has been a lot of healing going on so it is not time wasted. Have there been any improvements over this time last year? 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment
thelegend Posted June 2, 2020 Author Share Posted June 2, 2020 4 hours ago, brassmonkey said: It's a total bummer that it's taking so long to happen, but sometimes it just goes that way. We've had a number of members that took over a year to stabilize before they could continue, but it does happen. Even though you are not stabilized there has been a lot of healing going on so it is not time wasted. Have there been any improvements over this time last year? great to hear that it does happen, even for people that it takes this long for. Yes there have been improvements in many symptoms. Problem is the most bothersome symptoms, anxiety and early morning cortisol wake-ups don’t really feel any better, so it is hard to feel like I have made much progress, even though it has been over a year. April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
Lynnardgirl Posted June 3, 2020 Share Posted June 3, 2020 1 hour ago, thelegend said: great to hear that it does happen, even for people that it takes this long for. Yes there have been improvements in many symptoms. Problem is the most bothersome symptoms, anxiety and early morning cortisol wake-ups don’t really feel any better, so it is hard to feel like I have made much progress, even though it has been over a year. The anxiety is my worse symptom. So I understand when you say you don’t feel much progress! Feels like it will never end! 1997 regular Effexor 150 mg2016-2017 up dosage to 225 tried several times to taper no luck fast taper Back on panic attacks anxiety Insomnia 2017 doing ok after a year but then insomia doctor put me onTrazodone was on Trazodone for 6 months or longer did a fast taper getting panic attacks 2018 Doctor switched me to Effexor XR an reduced my dose to 225 - down to 150 felt worse went back on regular Effexor Venlafaxine 2018 taper again, To fast tapered down to 112.5 from 150 take half twice a day 56.25 Link to comment
thelegend Posted June 4, 2020 Author Share Posted June 4, 2020 I continue to go backwards. All symptoms are now back, including the burning arms. I am not sure what to do, I can’t keep doing this. I don’t know what the hell happened, I was doing so much better!! 1 April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
Lynnardgirl Posted June 4, 2020 Share Posted June 4, 2020 34 minutes ago, thelegend said: I continue to go backwards. All symptoms are now back, including the burning arms. I am not sure what to do, I can’t keep doing this. I don’t know what the hell happened, I was doing so much better!! It will ease up again! I am finally feeling better when all my symptoms especially anxiety was at it’s worse! It lasted for over a month ! you will be ok! Say as calm as you can and know you will get through this ! Prayers my friend 1 1997 regular Effexor 150 mg2016-2017 up dosage to 225 tried several times to taper no luck fast taper Back on panic attacks anxiety Insomnia 2017 doing ok after a year but then insomia doctor put me onTrazodone was on Trazodone for 6 months or longer did a fast taper getting panic attacks 2018 Doctor switched me to Effexor XR an reduced my dose to 225 - down to 150 felt worse went back on regular Effexor Venlafaxine 2018 taper again, To fast tapered down to 112.5 from 150 take half twice a day 56.25 Link to comment
sunnysideup69 Posted June 4, 2020 Share Posted June 4, 2020 2 hours ago, thelegend said: I continue to go backwards. All symptoms are now back, including the burning arms. I am not sure what to do, I can’t keep doing this. I don’t know what the hell happened, I was doing so much better!! @thelegend, try not to upset yourself with your thoughts. Face, accept and float. It's horrible, but it really is the best way to get through it. You were doing better and you got worse...that's the windows and waves pattern. You're not permanently worse, healing is happening and you will pick up again. Hopefully with an improved 'WD normal.' January 2008 to April 2015 Citalopram 20mg to 5mg, reducing in 50 per cent leaps. Jumped off at 5mg March 2016 used MDMA triggered setback April 2016 Citalopram 10mg October 2016 cut to 5mg, May 2017 cut to 2.5mg May 2018 used MDMA triggered setback June 2018 Citalopram 2.5mg up to 10mg, then back to 5mg July/ August 2018 7.5mg, then 10mg June 2019 updosed to 20mg Citalopram August 2019 cold switch to Venlafaxine 75mg XR Supplements; 1100mg fish oil daily; also 100mg Magnesium Glycinate. Tried Vagifem 10mcg from mid May 2021 to mid June 2021; caused depression, so stopped. Link to comment
thelegend Posted June 8, 2020 Author Share Posted June 8, 2020 On 6/2/2020 at 1:01 PM, brassmonkey said: It's a total bummer that it's taking so long to happen, but sometimes it just goes that way. We've had a number of members that took over a year to stabilize before they could continue, but it does happen. Even though you are not stabilized there has been a lot of healing going on so it is not time wasted. Have there been any improvements over this time last year? So you think if I keep staying steady I will eventually get better? It just has been such a long hard road, I have a hard time picturing life from a place of stability and strength. April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
Moderator brassmonkey Posted June 8, 2020 Moderator Share Posted June 8, 2020 Yes, I would hold a while longer. It can seem to take forever, but things do stabilize and once they do we can start to taper off of the drugs. Instead of trying to picture the life ahead of you, maybe work on the stability and strength you are feeling right now. Even at our worst it is there, it just needs to be exposed, accepted and built upon. 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment
Mentor Cocopuffz17 Posted June 8, 2020 Mentor Share Posted June 8, 2020 1 hour ago, thelegend said: So you think if I keep staying steady I will eventually get better? It just has been such a long hard road, I have a hard time picturing life from a place of stability and strength. Yes it will. Don’t go this far to quit. Keep going and get your reward. A life free of these medications !! Everyday that passes is one day closer to being healed! I follow The Plant Paradox lifestyle by Dr.Gundry. This lifestyle has given me my life back and I feel better than I have ever felt in my life. It has enabled me to finally get off of this medication and truly live my life. Nutrition is the key to health!!!!! 2008 to 2019 - 20 mg Paroxetine Attempted 2 CT's around the 5-6 year mark. Were absolutely terrible and reinstated. Was never explained by the doctor the seriousness of the short half life of this drug. 2017 - Attempted a tapered discontinuation of this drug and reinstated after being unsuccessful. 2019 - Feb. 12 - After a three month taper I am off of paroxetine. The 3 months were terrible, awful withdrawal feelings. I followed the doctors guidelines for the reduction of this drug and now know it was way too fast. 2019 - Oct. 12 - 8 months off paroxetine. 75% improvement since coming off the drug. Definitely have had tons of challenges along the way. Let’s go!!!! 2021 - Feb. 12 - 24 months off paroxetine. I have minor challenges now. Tinnitus/Headaches are still around but are reduced by a massive amount. Link to comment
Edmunds Posted June 8, 2020 Share Posted June 8, 2020 I've been on ADs for most of the time during the past 33 years. Every time I went to see my psychiatrist, I asked about research on the effects of long-term use. The answer was always some variation on "don't worry about that." The past year, since going off Effexor not quite CT (3 weeks) in May 2019, has been tough, but I reassure myself by remembering how long my brain has been dealing with ADs. I'm confident of getting better, and I'm not far from getting off the last AD (Prozac) after a long taper. If you get better and then get worse again, just know that the next reversal will come and the betterness will be better than before! Fluoxetine 1997-2014, 2015, 10-40 mg. GAD and DR symptoms returned April 2013. Bupropion 2013-14, 4 mos; Lexapro 2014; Cymbalta 2014. Gabapentin 2014; Mirtazapene 2014. Buspirone 2015. Venlafaxine Dec. 2015 – May 2019, 150 mg, tapered to 0 in 3 weeks, May-June 2019 Bupropion Mar 2017 – July 2019 300 mg, tapered to 0 in 3 weeks, July 2019 Fluoxetine/Prozac May 2019 – present, tapered from 20 mg started Jan 2020, linear 10% every 4 wks.; tapered 6 to 4 mg June, 2, 2020; 4 to 1.8 mg Aug. 26, 2020; updose from 1.8 mg to 2.0 Nov. 16, 2020. Holding at 2.0 mg as of Mar 14,2021. April 14, 2021 updosed to 2.5 mg. D3 2,000 mg; Omega 3 360 EPA/240 DHA; Magnesium Chelate 250 mg; Inositol powder started Nov 12, 2020; Theanine 400 mg; cranial electrotherapy stimulation device, self-treatments started Mar 14, 2021. Link to comment
sunnysideup69 Posted June 17, 2020 Share Posted June 17, 2020 Hey @thelegend, I'm hoping you're feeling a bit better, as you've not posted in a while. No pressure to respond, enjoy the good days as they happen January 2008 to April 2015 Citalopram 20mg to 5mg, reducing in 50 per cent leaps. Jumped off at 5mg March 2016 used MDMA triggered setback April 2016 Citalopram 10mg October 2016 cut to 5mg, May 2017 cut to 2.5mg May 2018 used MDMA triggered setback June 2018 Citalopram 2.5mg up to 10mg, then back to 5mg July/ August 2018 7.5mg, then 10mg June 2019 updosed to 20mg Citalopram August 2019 cold switch to Venlafaxine 75mg XR Supplements; 1100mg fish oil daily; also 100mg Magnesium Glycinate. Tried Vagifem 10mcg from mid May 2021 to mid June 2021; caused depression, so stopped. Link to comment
Giulietta Posted June 17, 2020 Share Posted June 17, 2020 On 6/8/2020 at 3:50 PM, thelegend said: t just has been such a long hard road, I have a hard time picturing life from a place of stability and strength. Hello Legend, I'm sorry you are continuing to have a rough go of it. One wonders when things will get better, if they have to stay on these meds, or what. I'm having a crummy time too and asking myself some similar questions. Someone today reminded me of the following....maybe it will help you.... 1. These drugs were never meant to be taken long term 2. Trying another AD is drug Russian roulette; you have no idea what it will do to you, especially with your system sensitized from the CT and the other drugs that you have to take. 3. In Anatomy of an Epidemic, Robert Whitaker found that statistically over the long-term people who weren't on AD's did much better than people who are. I don't know that this helps answer your question - but something to keekp in mind. G. Link to comment
thelegend Posted June 18, 2020 Author Share Posted June 18, 2020 On 6/16/2020 at 11:26 PM, sunnysideup69 said: Hey @thelegend, I'm hoping you're feeling a bit better, as you've not posted in a while. No pressure to respond, enjoy the good days as they happen Not doing great, but managing. I guess that is better than I was, but it still isn’t fun! Really hoping it gets better soon! 1 April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
thelegend Posted June 21, 2020 Author Share Posted June 21, 2020 On 6/8/2020 at 1:57 PM, brassmonkey said: Instead of trying to picture the life ahead of you, maybe work on the stability and strength you are feeling right now. Even at our worst it is there, it just needs to be exposed, accepted and built upon. this is great advice, most days I can really feel some strength and stability, others not so much. everyone does eventually stabilize, correct? April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
Moderator brassmonkey Posted June 21, 2020 Moderator Share Posted June 21, 2020 Yes they do. 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment
thelegend Posted July 6, 2020 Author Share Posted July 6, 2020 Wave continues, had some good days in June, but not the sustained improvement I was seeing in the Spring. Hopefully that can come back. I do have a weird new symptom, like a warm feeling that runs down my upper leg on my right side. Happens a few times a day, feels like I peed my pants, really odd. Not sure if anyone else has had this, if this is WD related or something else. July Update: Extreme Anxiety - probably as bad as ever. Warm Sensation in leg - New and really annoying Sensitive to sound - gone Sensitive to touch - gone Pins and needles - gone Burning eyes, arms, back, feet - sometimes eyes, I can also feel chest and arms at times, but not to the degree they once were Hyper stimulation - still around, like I am always keyed up Bad sleep - much worse than the Spring, probably not as bad as the beginning. Waking with cortisal spikes - again, has come back significantly, not as bad as the beginning. Light headedness, or feeling like you are not quite all there - This has been quite prevalent during this wave, probably as bad as ever IBS - a little better than last month Shaking - can get pretty noticeable at times Sweating - better than it used to be Overall there are still improvements, but I have definitely taken a few steps back from where I was in the Spring. Hoping this wave starts to fade soon as this is really hard! April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
Tom37 Posted July 6, 2020 Share Posted July 6, 2020 Most importantly there are improvements and they will continue. I know I had a good period where for 6 to 8 weeks at about 9 months I was feeling pretty good to then go backwards for a couple of months which I didn’t expect. After that though I did move forward again and that’s what this thing does. You haven’t lost the earlier healing it just means there is more to be done. 20mg Lexapro 2007 10mg Lexapro 2012 Started tapering approx (October 2017) 12 months ago from 10mg to 9mg then 8 then 7 then 6 then 5 then 4 then 3. Held for approx 4 to 6 weeks min on each reduction. Hit severe symptoms (started 7th Nov) after dropping to 3mg. Dropped to 3mg approx 22nd October. Back to 4mg (7th November) and stabilising. Current symptoms started 23rd November 2018 Used diazepam (2018) 10mg 10th Nov, 5mg 11th Nov, 2.5mg 12 Nov, 2mg 13th Nov. Used diazepam 10mg 24th Nov, 7.5 25th Nov and 5mg 26th November 2018 Link to comment
thelegend Posted July 7, 2020 Author Share Posted July 7, 2020 21 hours ago, Tom37 said: Most importantly there are improvements and they will continue. I know I had a good period where for 6 to 8 weeks at about 9 months I was feeling pretty good to then go backwards for a couple of months which I didn’t expect. After that though I did move forward again and that’s what this thing does. You haven’t lost the earlier healing it just means there is more to be done. thanks Tom, sometimes it is good to just know that it is getting better. I just can’t believe how slow, well over a year into a hold. April 2010 - January 2018: Zoloft 50-100 mgs (would go back and forth between these doses, mostly at 50mgs). April - May 2018: Attempted to restart Zoloft for 6 weeks, made things worse so switched to... June 2018 - Novemeber 2019: Lexapro 10mgs August 2018 - Current: Zyprexa added for early morning extreme anxiety November 2018 - February 2019: Lexapro 5mgs, then off since doctor said it “wasn’t working if still having anxiety.” Looking back I was probably stabilizing very slowly. New Doctor reinstated: May 1st, 2019 - Current - Zoloft 50mgs, 2.5mg Zyprexa Link to comment
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