Jump to content

Erell: struggling with paroxetine


Erell

Recommended Posts

  • Moderator

Hey Sass!

1. Ok, I won't take magnésium for now!

 

2. I know you can't answer, just expressing my worries. ;)

 

3. Yes I have to think positive! You're so right, I'm starting a 'gratitude journal' : every night, find 3 positive things in my day.

 

4. I don't understand when you say "you have made a great start" : actually I take 10 mg of Paroxetine since August 22nd, so it's been on month. I messed up by adding a lot of suppléments, but I changed dose of Paroxetine To 15mg only 2 days. So, it really is all these suppléments who made me so bad?

 

I'm not complaining ;) just trying To understand what is the "start" you're talking about, To make sure I really understand the process. And trying To understand how these supplements could make me Feel so bad!

 

5. Haha, I prefer not To imagine what can your joke be ! :)

 

6. I see that you don't tell much about your feelings, and I respect that. Just know that I wish you're doing ok, and think of you!

 

Thank you Sass! I tell you all the time, I don't know how To express how much your support is an important thing in my life right now! 

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam 2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.64mg (4 Nov 2021) / 6.72mg (8 oct 2021) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

Link to comment

Is it possible to introduce food containing magnesium, like seeds?

Edited by Erell

My psychiatric drug history goes back, on and off, to 1999.  This is my taper chronology:

Jan. 2018:                        900 mg  Lithium                      1 mg Risperidone               250 mg Lamotrigine 

Jan. 2018:                        0 mg  Lithium*                        1 mg Risperidone               250 mg Lamotrigine 

Jan. 2019:                        0 mg Lithium                           0.625 mg Risperidone       175 mg Lamotrigine

Jan. 2020:                       0 mg Lithium                           0.260 mg Risperidone       175 mg Lamotrigine

Feb. 2021:                        0 mg Lithium                           0 mg Risperidone              175 mg Lamotrigine

August 2021                    0 mg Lithium                           0 mg Risperidone              0 mg Lamotrigine

*I had to cold turkey lithium because of life-threatening side effects.

Measuring doses: The Withdrawal Project at the Inner Compass Initiative website, which explains how to do the microtaper to make it as smooth as possible 

Nutrition: The Clean Gut Diet by Alejandro Junger, MD, and Viva Naturals Omega 3 Fish Oil Supplements

Psychological: "Dr. Bruce H. Lipton Explains How To Reprogram The Subconscious Mind" (on YouTube) and PSYCH-K (an alternative healing modality)

Link to comment

Je pensais a toi et je me suis dit, peut-être qu'il y a plus d'un Cyprien...voilà celui dont j'ai parle avant: http://www.cyprien.fr/.  Je ne savais pas ce que tu as dit de Gad Elmaleh!  Je ne suis pas au courant apparemment. Continue a te focaliser sur le bien et fais les choses qui donnent du réconfort et dis moi si tu trouves, un jour, une vidéo qui explique comment faire glittery eye shadow parce que ça a l'air vraiment trop compliqué!

My psychiatric drug history goes back, on and off, to 1999.  This is my taper chronology:

Jan. 2018:                        900 mg  Lithium                      1 mg Risperidone               250 mg Lamotrigine 

Jan. 2018:                        0 mg  Lithium*                        1 mg Risperidone               250 mg Lamotrigine 

Jan. 2019:                        0 mg Lithium                           0.625 mg Risperidone       175 mg Lamotrigine

Jan. 2020:                       0 mg Lithium                           0.260 mg Risperidone       175 mg Lamotrigine

Feb. 2021:                        0 mg Lithium                           0 mg Risperidone              175 mg Lamotrigine

August 2021                    0 mg Lithium                           0 mg Risperidone              0 mg Lamotrigine

*I had to cold turkey lithium because of life-threatening side effects.

Measuring doses: The Withdrawal Project at the Inner Compass Initiative website, which explains how to do the microtaper to make it as smooth as possible 

Nutrition: The Clean Gut Diet by Alejandro Junger, MD, and Viva Naturals Omega 3 Fish Oil Supplements

Psychological: "Dr. Bruce H. Lipton Explains How To Reprogram The Subconscious Mind" (on YouTube) and PSYCH-K (an alternative healing modality)

Link to comment
  • Moderator

Hello!

Well what a misérable night...

I fell asleep at 1am, and woke up at 2am with violent anxiety and despair, feeling like i was going crazy. Finally fell asleep again and then woke up every hour with this terrible anxiety, terror.

Made awful dreams, horror movies. 

 

I woke up again  at 7.30 am, anxious and despair.

 

Could this be a waves and Windows pattern? I don't understand what is happening. So afraid. At least I used To sleep Well.

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam 2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.64mg (4 Nov 2021) / 6.72mg (8 oct 2021) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

 

Hi Erell

How many days is it since we dropped the dose to 10 mg?

Are The Terror and anxiety symptoms the same as a couple of days ago?

What were you dreaming about?

Sass

 

Edited by Sassenach

Escitalopram 10mgs from mid 2007 ( can't remember exact date) to 11th Dec 2018

Fentanyl patches ( don't remember dose ) from Nov 2014 to 11 Dec 2018

Quit both cold turkey Dec 2018

Reinstated 3rd March 2019 2.5 mgs.

Updosed  8March to 5mgs and holding

25/11/19 Started taper 4.5mgs and holding

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner

If you are going through Hell, keep going. NCIS series 15, David MaCallum:rolleyes:

Link to comment
  • Moderator

Hi Sass

I dropped To 10mg on wednesday 25th Sept,  so Today is day 6.

 

Yes I think terror and anxiety were the same this night than last week.

 

I'm not sure what I dream about : it looked like horror movies, people were killed...

 

Oh Sass I'm so scared! I thought that because the past few days were easier i would be more able To manage anxiety...But I was wrong.

 

Am i in trouble?

 

Thank you so much for your time!

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam 2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.64mg (4 Nov 2021) / 6.72mg (8 oct 2021) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

Link to comment
  • Moderator
2 hours ago, Sassenach said:

How many days is it since we dropped the dose to 10 mg?

Are you asking me because my situation is weird ? Or because you want To remind me that it is too early To Feel better?

 

Am I in a weird situation or is it usual To have this kind of wave ?

 

Sorry for spamming, I'm trying To stop torturing myself but it is hard. I know I ask you a lot.

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam 2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.64mg (4 Nov 2021) / 6.72mg (8 oct 2021) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Your situation is not weird.

It is Windows and waves.

As soon as we have a good day we think we will just carry on improving even though we know no we won't.

It is natural human behaviour

 

The drug will not reach full state for at least another two days and we will review then.

How are you feeling now.

I am out and about all day today so it will be this evening before I am available to comment much further.

Keep believing.

 

Escitalopram 10mgs from mid 2007 ( can't remember exact date) to 11th Dec 2018

Fentanyl patches ( don't remember dose ) from Nov 2014 to 11 Dec 2018

Quit both cold turkey Dec 2018

Reinstated 3rd March 2019 2.5 mgs.

Updosed  8March to 5mgs and holding

25/11/19 Started taper 4.5mgs and holding

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner

If you are going through Hell, keep going. NCIS series 15, David MaCallum:rolleyes:

Link to comment
  • Moderator

Thank you Sass!

 

I am a bit reassured by the fact that m'y situation is not weird. Yes you're right, because it was improving, I thought it would continue To improve.

 

Now : anxiety at 6 and despair at 7.

 

I don't wanna stop believing. I'm just so scared about everything.

 

So glad To read you can be out all day, enjoy it!

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam 2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.64mg (4 Nov 2021) / 6.72mg (8 oct 2021) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

Link to comment
  • Moderator

Terror is back again. And I don't know how To get through this. 

I'm gonna have To quit my job. Go back To my parents home. So afraid they could make me go To an hospital, I don't wanna have added drugs.

 

Oh I'm so sorry everybody for these multiple messages! Don't know how To go through the day. I don't have suicidal ideas, but so scared of this terror state! I know you all can't do anything for me. I just need To tell somebody how hard it is and this forum is the only place.

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam 2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.64mg (4 Nov 2021) / 6.72mg (8 oct 2021) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Stop panicking Erell.

Remember the terror cannot hurt you unless you let it, it is not real just your brain playing tricks.

Tomorrow you will feel different about everything and wonder what is was all about.

Distraction, distraction, distraction

 

Sass

Escitalopram 10mgs from mid 2007 ( can't remember exact date) to 11th Dec 2018

Fentanyl patches ( don't remember dose ) from Nov 2014 to 11 Dec 2018

Quit both cold turkey Dec 2018

Reinstated 3rd March 2019 2.5 mgs.

Updosed  8March to 5mgs and holding

25/11/19 Started taper 4.5mgs and holding

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner

If you are going through Hell, keep going. NCIS series 15, David MaCallum:rolleyes:

Link to comment
  • Moderator

I know my brain is trying To stabilize. I don't know how To help him.

 

Its been a month now, stucked into my flat,  hoping badly To get better. I'm exhausted. Not physically but psychologically. And I'm so afraid about future : quit my job, my flat, loosing friends, see fear and sadness in my parents eyes. I know I'm disappointing everybody around me since a month.

 

I really do know that you can't do anything about it, and that only time can help me. And in the mean time, my days are so long and full of anxiety. I also do know that everybody is struggling here. I admire all the courage I can read here. So many strong people! I don't know if I can be strong like this. I don't even know if I want To tapper ever again. Just hoping I Will Feel functionnal soon. 

 

I try not panicking. Find distractions. But I can't tell I'm succeeding. 

 

 

I'm so sorry Sass, you must have To manage your Wd too. I hope you're doing ok!

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam 2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.64mg (4 Nov 2021) / 6.72mg (8 oct 2021) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi Erell.

3 hours ago, Erell said:

I know I'm disappointing everybody around me since a month.

You have to let this go.

The only person that matters in W/D is yourself, you do not have the reserves to deal with anything else.

Eventually they will see the real you again.

I had to attend a regular hospital checkup today, it is a two hour drive away.

I awoke this morning feeling awful so today was hard, but I get more good days than bad now.

If someone asks me how I feel, better than yesterday, not as good as tomorrow.

It is not always true because of windows and wave, it keeps me positive.

If you do not feel better tomorrow it may be worth trying a small dose of the magnesium.

We can discuss in the morning.

 

Sass

Escitalopram 10mgs from mid 2007 ( can't remember exact date) to 11th Dec 2018

Fentanyl patches ( don't remember dose ) from Nov 2014 to 11 Dec 2018

Quit both cold turkey Dec 2018

Reinstated 3rd March 2019 2.5 mgs.

Updosed  8March to 5mgs and holding

25/11/19 Started taper 4.5mgs and holding

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner

If you are going through Hell, keep going. NCIS series 15, David MaCallum:rolleyes:

Link to comment
  • Moderator

Hi Sass!

 

You must Feel exhausted with your day, take care!

 

About magnésium citrate : I bought a bag of powder. The advice on it say : take one coffee spoon/day  (2.5g) in water. Don't know what a small dose could be, unfortunately i don't have scale. 

I won't bother you with this tonight, let me know tomorrow if you have any advice.

 

Wish you a sweet evening.

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam 2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.64mg (4 Nov 2021) / 6.72mg (8 oct 2021) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Now is fine.

I am a little better this evening.

How are you feeling now?

Escitalopram 10mgs from mid 2007 ( can't remember exact date) to 11th Dec 2018

Fentanyl patches ( don't remember dose ) from Nov 2014 to 11 Dec 2018

Quit both cold turkey Dec 2018

Reinstated 3rd March 2019 2.5 mgs.

Updosed  8March to 5mgs and holding

25/11/19 Started taper 4.5mgs and holding

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner

If you are going through Hell, keep going. NCIS series 15, David MaCallum:rolleyes:

Link to comment
  • Moderator

To be honest, it has been an horrible day : anxiety and despair at rate 8 or 9, all day. Cried a lot. Lot of restlessness and feeling of urge. Tremors. I tried several tips, but everything terrified me (legs up on wall, sweet music, ventral breathing...). Also terrifying thoughts : my situation is weird, I won't be able To live like this for several weeks,...

 

Now, it has decreased a bit but still struggling : anxiety at 7 and despair at 6. Tremors.

I'm scared about going To bed tonight because of my terrible night. I know it does no good, so I try To stay positive.

 

Well, in fact, it was and still is an awful day. I put a lot of hope in tomorrow. Can't imagine live with this state of terror for several next weeks.

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam 2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.64mg (4 Nov 2021) / 6.72mg (8 oct 2021) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Take your phone to bed and play this.

http://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/music/FirstAidPanicF.mp3

Escitalopram 10mgs from mid 2007 ( can't remember exact date) to 11th Dec 2018

Fentanyl patches ( don't remember dose ) from Nov 2014 to 11 Dec 2018

Quit both cold turkey Dec 2018

Reinstated 3rd March 2019 2.5 mgs.

Updosed  8March to 5mgs and holding

25/11/19 Started taper 4.5mgs and holding

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner

If you are going through Hell, keep going. NCIS series 15, David MaCallum:rolleyes:

Link to comment
  • Moderator
21 minutes ago, Erell said:

take one coffee spoon/day  (2.5g)

That's a very high dose, 2500mg.  I would start much lower.  Magnesium in high doses can have a laxative effect.

Gridley Introduction

 

Lexapro 20 mg since 2004.  Begin Brassmonkey Slide Taper Jan. 2017.   

End 2017 year 1 of taper at 9.25mg 

End 2018 year 2 of taper at 4.1mg

End 2019 year 3 of taper at 1.0mg  

Oct. 30, 2020  Jump to zero from 0.025mg.  Current dose: 0.000mg

3 year, 10 month taper is 100% complete.

 

Ativan 1 mg to 1.875mg 1986-2020, two CT's and reinstatements

Nov. 2020, 7-week Ativan-Valium crossover to 18.75mg 

Feb. 2021, begin 10%/4 week taper.  Current dose as of Nov 31: 6.6mg 

Taper is 65% complete.

 

Imipramine 75 mg daily since 1986.  Jan-Sept 2016 tapered to 16mg.  

Held until Aug 2021, tapered for 4 weeks to 14.4mg and holding.  

Taper is 80% complete.  

  

Supplements: omega-3, vitamins C, E and D3, magnesium glycinate, probiotic, zinc, melatonin .3mg


I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice, but simply information based on my own experience, as well as other members who have survived these drugs.

Link to comment
  • Moderator

Thanks Sass, I'm going To try it!

 

Unknowing is one of the most scary thing : unkknowing if this terror Will last several weeks.

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam 2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.64mg (4 Nov 2021) / 6.72mg (8 oct 2021) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

Link to comment
  • Moderator

@Gridley : thanks for the information. 

I would start lower too, not easy without a scale. I'm going To look online To see if I buy one.

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam 2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.64mg (4 Nov 2021) / 6.72mg (8 oct 2021) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Thanks @Gridley

 

Is it possible to dissolve in water and use a syringe to take small dose?

 

Sass

Escitalopram 10mgs from mid 2007 ( can't remember exact date) to 11th Dec 2018

Fentanyl patches ( don't remember dose ) from Nov 2014 to 11 Dec 2018

Quit both cold turkey Dec 2018

Reinstated 3rd March 2019 2.5 mgs.

Updosed  8March to 5mgs and holding

25/11/19 Started taper 4.5mgs and holding

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner

If you are going through Hell, keep going. NCIS series 15, David MaCallum:rolleyes:

Link to comment
  • Moderator

Oh yes, I think it could work! I have syringes. For what I read on the forum,  may be better To try magnésium in thé morning, so I will try tomorrow.

 

Thank both of you!

 

And, I abuse, but if anyone could reassure me before the night, telling me that I won't live months with this state of terror ?  😳

 

Thanks for your support!

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam 2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.64mg (4 Nov 2021) / 6.72mg (8 oct 2021) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus
3 minutes ago, Erell said:

And, I abuse, but if anyone could reassure me before the night, telling me that I won't live months with this state of terror

There are no guarantees but this site's advice is based on years of anecdotal evidence, which says it is very unlikey to last for ever.

Chin up, keep fighting.

 

Sass

Escitalopram 10mgs from mid 2007 ( can't remember exact date) to 11th Dec 2018

Fentanyl patches ( don't remember dose ) from Nov 2014 to 11 Dec 2018

Quit both cold turkey Dec 2018

Reinstated 3rd March 2019 2.5 mgs.

Updosed  8March to 5mgs and holding

25/11/19 Started taper 4.5mgs and holding

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner

If you are going through Hell, keep going. NCIS series 15, David MaCallum:rolleyes:

Link to comment
  • Moderator
12 minutes ago, Sassenach said:

 

Is it possible to dissolve in water and use a syringe to take small dose?

You could do the syringe if that's convenient.   What's recommended is to dissolve a mall dose of powder in a glass of water and sip throughout the day.  You could limit it to the morning if you like.  Just start with a small dose and increase from there.

Gridley Introduction

 

Lexapro 20 mg since 2004.  Begin Brassmonkey Slide Taper Jan. 2017.   

End 2017 year 1 of taper at 9.25mg 

End 2018 year 2 of taper at 4.1mg

End 2019 year 3 of taper at 1.0mg  

Oct. 30, 2020  Jump to zero from 0.025mg.  Current dose: 0.000mg

3 year, 10 month taper is 100% complete.

 

Ativan 1 mg to 1.875mg 1986-2020, two CT's and reinstatements

Nov. 2020, 7-week Ativan-Valium crossover to 18.75mg 

Feb. 2021, begin 10%/4 week taper.  Current dose as of Nov 31: 6.6mg 

Taper is 65% complete.

 

Imipramine 75 mg daily since 1986.  Jan-Sept 2016 tapered to 16mg.  

Held until Aug 2021, tapered for 4 weeks to 14.4mg and holding.  

Taper is 80% complete.  

  

Supplements: omega-3, vitamins C, E and D3, magnesium glycinate, probiotic, zinc, melatonin .3mg


I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice, but simply information based on my own experience, as well as other members who have survived these drugs.

Link to comment
  • Moderator

Thank you Sass 

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam 2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.64mg (4 Nov 2021) / 6.72mg (8 oct 2021) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

Link to comment
  • Moderator

@Gridley : thank you too!!

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam 2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.64mg (4 Nov 2021) / 6.72mg (8 oct 2021) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Thanks due to Gridley not me.

I have was not sure of the answer:blush:

oops:rolleyes:

Escitalopram 10mgs from mid 2007 ( can't remember exact date) to 11th Dec 2018

Fentanyl patches ( don't remember dose ) from Nov 2014 to 11 Dec 2018

Quit both cold turkey Dec 2018

Reinstated 3rd March 2019 2.5 mgs.

Updosed  8March to 5mgs and holding

25/11/19 Started taper 4.5mgs and holding

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner

If you are going through Hell, keep going. NCIS series 15, David MaCallum:rolleyes:

Link to comment
  • Moderator

Yes but it was a thank you for your presence ;) I know I ask you a lot, even telling me that everything is gonna be better soon while you can't guarantee anything ;)

 

Just To be sure :

If I put 2500mg of magnesium in 100ml of water,  taking 1ml will give me 25mg?

(I read alto's advice about starting with 25mg).

 

If tonight is too awful, i'll try it.

 

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam 2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.64mg (4 Nov 2021) / 6.72mg (8 oct 2021) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi Erell, I am back from my visit with family and trip to the coast. I thought of you there. 

 

I know life is not great for you right now but I think you are doing very well and I am encouraged to hear how it is going for you.

 

The despair is part of what we call "neuro-emotion". When it comes, it can be very difficult to remember that you have ever felt good in the past. It's challenging but as you can see those emotions pass. It is best not to listen to what they tell you, if possible.

 

Anyway, hugs to you, have another good day tomorrow!

Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. 

Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010.  Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea.

 

Feb 15 2010:  300 mg Neurontin  200 Lamictal   10 Celexa      0.65 Xanax   and 5 mg Ambien 

Feb 10 2014:   62 Lamictal    1.1 Celexa         0.135 Xanax    1.8 Valium

Feb 10 2015:   50 Lamictal      0.875 Celexa    0.11 Xanax      1.5 Valium

Feb 15 2016:   47.5 Lamictal   0.75 Celexa      0.0875 Xanax    1.42 Valium    

2/12/20             12                       0.045               0.007                   1 

May 2021            7                       0.01                  0.0037                   1

 

I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion.

Link to comment
  • Moderator

Hi Rhi!

I've been thinking of you this week end!! Hope it was a sweet trip!!!

 

It feels Nice To read you're encouraged despite this bad day of terror! 

 

Hugs!

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam 2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.64mg (4 Nov 2021) / 6.72mg (8 oct 2021) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus
25 minutes ago, Gridley said:

What's recommended is to dissolve a mall dose of powder in a glass of water and sip throughout the day.

I think this is the best idea.

Quarter of a spoon in a glass.

You do not have to be as accurate with the dose as the recommendations on here for antidepressant doses.

If you sip throughout the day you will not get too high a dose and if you feel any bad effects just stop.

 

Sass

Escitalopram 10mgs from mid 2007 ( can't remember exact date) to 11th Dec 2018

Fentanyl patches ( don't remember dose ) from Nov 2014 to 11 Dec 2018

Quit both cold turkey Dec 2018

Reinstated 3rd March 2019 2.5 mgs.

Updosed  8March to 5mgs and holding

25/11/19 Started taper 4.5mgs and holding

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner

If you are going through Hell, keep going. NCIS series 15, David MaCallum:rolleyes:

Link to comment
  • Moderator

Yes I agree. Will try this tomorrow if no improvments. 

Thank you all!

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam 2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.64mg (4 Nov 2021) / 6.72mg (8 oct 2021) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus
8 minutes ago, Erell said:

Hi Rhi!

I've been thinking of you this week end!! Hope it was a sweet trip!!!

 

It feels Nice To read you're encouraged despite this bad day of terror! 

 

Hugs!

 I know it is impossible for you to see the large, hopeful picture that I see. I have seen so many people go through withdrawal and all the various paths of reinstatement, changing meds, et cetera. So many stories. I have seen the patterns that emerge from all of those stories. It is because of having watched people so many times, that I see much in your situation to be encouraged by. 

 

So, I know right now you are feeling miserable in many ways. That is part of the pattern and is very normal. It is terrible to live through, but it is normal.

 

There is much about your response to reinstatement that is hopeful. You have been showing good signs right from the start (getting some tiny windows right away, having some better evenings even when the days were bad). You have a positive attitude and good social support. You are young and healthy. You seem to be willing to understand that you need to be patient and respect this process, rather than to keep trying to jump forward and keep getting more destabilized by making multiple changes. (That is to say you learn quickly!)

 

What I believe you can expect is, unfortunately, to feel pretty bad a lot of the time for a few more months, but to have a good moment or two almost every day, and to have days that are better mixed in with the bad ones. And unfortunately probably some days that are worse mixed in as well. But the days that are better will gradually come to outnumber the days that are worse. And gradually there will be less and less flip-flopping and more and more steady state. And that steady state, that baseline, will be gradually better.

 

Eventually you will be in a fairly steady state almost all the time. That is when it is time to begin to think about the next steps of tapering. Not before. This will take time.  Nobody can say for sure how long. My guess, based on your story so far, is that it will take somewhere between three and nine months. No promises! Just a guess.

 

So there you go. It's not a bright happy jolly story, but it's actually quite hopeful. I think there is a very very VERY good chance that, as long as you are patient, take care of yourself and don't do anything crazy, you can navigate this process successfully, and eventually taper safely all the way off all psychiatric medications, and go on to have a rich and satisfying life.

 

 

Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. 

Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010.  Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea.

 

Feb 15 2010:  300 mg Neurontin  200 Lamictal   10 Celexa      0.65 Xanax   and 5 mg Ambien 

Feb 10 2014:   62 Lamictal    1.1 Celexa         0.135 Xanax    1.8 Valium

Feb 10 2015:   50 Lamictal      0.875 Celexa    0.11 Xanax      1.5 Valium

Feb 15 2016:   47.5 Lamictal   0.75 Celexa      0.0875 Xanax    1.42 Valium    

2/12/20             12                       0.045               0.007                   1 

May 2021            7                       0.01                  0.0037                   1

 

I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion.

Link to comment

@Sassenach  This is terrific:

"If you are going through Hell, keep going. NCIS series 15, David MaCallum"

 

I'm glad your day went OK and you felt better in the evening.

 

Dear Erell,

You can and will get through his misery. I went through this as well - and it was terrifying - I didn't know when I would feel better or if I would (like you said). One hour I would have jitters and tremors and the next hour I would be in despair and sobbing. I didn't know if I would make it through this  -  but I was determined that I would succeed. I knew how horrible the drug was - that I had to get off - and with all the side effects while on it- it was bad for me! One thing that I told myself when I was in despair is that eventually I would need to get off duloxetine anyway. 

 

I hadn't found SA so I didn't understand what the heck was happening to me and have the emotional support.  We are all pullig for you and KNOW you will improve. It's a lot of work for our brains to adjust to not having the drug so until it adjusts to 'normal' again - we do have terror, panic, despair, unpleasant emotional states.

 

I have recently been having more good days than bad. I am thankful. It has taken me 9 months to get here. After stabilizing on this - I have to do what you did masterfully - get off a benzo. You are awesome to have done that. If you can do that you can do this! :)

 

Hugs,

Giuilietta

 

 

 

Link to comment
4 minutes ago, Rhiannon said:

What I believe you can expect is, unfortunately, to feel pretty bad a lot of the time for a few more months, but to have a good moment or two almost every day, and to have days that are better mixed in with the bad ones. And unfortunately probably some days that are worse mixed in as well. But the days that are better will gradually come to outnumber the days that are worse. And gradually there will be less and less flip-flopping and more and more steady state. And that steady state, that baseline, will be gradually better.

 

Eventually you will be in a fairly steady state almost all the time. That is when it is time to begin to think about the next steps of tapering. Not before. This will take time.  Nobody can say for sure how long.

 

The expectations that Rhi put are so true - and my experience as well. Things seem bleak now AND you will get better. 

 

Have a very pleasant night,  😴

 

Giuilietta 

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus
5 minutes ago, Rhiannon said:

 

What I believe you can expect is, unfortunately, to feel pretty bad a lot of the time for a few more months, but to have a good moment or two almost every day, and to have days that are better mixed in with the bad ones.

 

 

I see on reviewing your thread that you had the terrors again today and you are afraid they will not go away. I just want to clarify that I am not saying you will be in a state of terror for a few more months! Those are the bad days. They will come and go, I cannot say you will never have them again, but they will become less frequent and less terrible. They may cycle with your monthly hormones also. I was already past menopause when I began my tapering process, but I have seen many women find that their WD symptoms cycle with their hormones, which makes perfect sense.

 

Anyway I just wanted to make sure you understand, I am speaking of feeling generally not well, not saying you will be in terror. Since you have already had a few good days so early in the process, that is a VERY positive sign. Please go back and read your own thread and see that you have already had some relief from the terrors. That relief will happen again. You will have better days. There will also be a lot of bad days early on, but gradually this is all going to improve.

 

And one day, maybe a couple of years from now, when you are out dancing and running around and enjoying life and having adventures, you will look back on this time, and the future Erell will say to the 2019 Erell, "thank you so much for just going through those days, for continuing to walk your path, it was terrible and I am so grateful because now I have my life back!"

Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. 

Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010.  Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea.

 

Feb 15 2010:  300 mg Neurontin  200 Lamictal   10 Celexa      0.65 Xanax   and 5 mg Ambien 

Feb 10 2014:   62 Lamictal    1.1 Celexa         0.135 Xanax    1.8 Valium

Feb 10 2015:   50 Lamictal      0.875 Celexa    0.11 Xanax      1.5 Valium

Feb 15 2016:   47.5 Lamictal   0.75 Celexa      0.0875 Xanax    1.42 Valium    

2/12/20             12                       0.045               0.007                   1 

May 2021            7                       0.01                  0.0037                   1

 

I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion.

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Terms of Use Privacy Policy