Erell: struggling with paroxetine

[Fallensoul]

I also doubt exposure will work in a drug disrupted brain. It aren't your thoughts, it's drug induced.

 

I have also sensimotor ocd, and that only manifest when changing drugs, dose change or drug change, I never had this in my whole life.

This is one of my most tough, difficult and fearsome thoughts.

But when in a window, I cann't imagine that it scares me.

The difference in relativation is extreme in wd and is the keyfactor in coping these tough times.

 

But when this drugged state get/is less, then it can maybe speed up recovery. This is how it works with me, and probably I'm not the only one.

 

I also force myself to walk with the dog, and often I feel better after it.

But sometimes it can be to much, esp. just after wakeup I can't handle all the action.

 

 

[mstimc]

Hi Erell

 

One of the foundational principles of CBT is self-compassion and self-kindness.  Don't beat yourself up because you're not in a place to do major exposure therapy right now.  Congratulate yourself on managing some of your DP/DR sensations.  I've found one way to calm the flight or flight feelings is to spend a few minutes doing vipassana-style mindful breathing--just repeating the words "breathe in" and "breathe out" in rhythm with your breath.  Even if you spend just a few seconds concentrating on your breathing, it breaks the fear/fight thought pattern and calms the body.  Its a small start but the key is to do what you can.  Eventually the fears will fade and you'll be back in a solid recovery pattern.

[Rosetta]

Exposure therapy? No, not in WD.  CBT made sense to me, theoretically, before I knew I was in WD.  I made progress with it when I was having very long windows after I had an adverse reaction to Paxil over 20 years ago.  At that time, I didn’t know I had PWS or that W&W were patterns in recovering from that.  
 

During a wave, I do not think it’s a good idea to deliberately think about or bring up ideas that are upsetting for you in WD.  The intrusive thoughts are traumatic enough.  Waves can be very long with short, fleeting windows in between.  Just the memory of working through CBT exercises on a difficult topic can make a wave more miserable, in my view.
 

I suppose that learning CBT during those windows would be useful, but I would use very silly examples to practice it rather than real-life problems.  Gaining understanding of the concept and practicing going through the steps with silly, harmless examples might be an option for you.  Later, when your system has calmed down, and you can cope much better, then thinking through the CBT steps about the subject matter of intrusive thoughts might be helpful. For now, it’s not going to help very much to resolve the issue because your brain isn’t stable.  
 

I’m not saying CBT is useless, but it might be more harmful than useful when withdrawal is at a high point.  It would be like telling someone without legs that she could run a marathon if only she could learn to control her thoughts through CBT.  Your brain isn’t responding normally to stimulus, and it is recognizing harmless stimulus as dangerous.  You could make progress during a window, if you have them, only to see it disappear during a wave.  I think it would serve you well over the long run, but at what cost?  Distraction is definitely the best way until withdrawal is much less intense.

 

Thinking of you, Rosetta

[Mimi79]

Hi Erell

Just my two cents.

Last year, I did exposure therapy to treat my intrusives thoughts from mirtazapine w/d, and it wasn't a good idea.

When I was in a window, the exercice seemed useless to me, as I was no more afraid of my thoughts.

When I was in a wave, it was very painful, it exacerbated the thoughts. No fun.

When I realized I was losing my time ( and  money), I stopped it. Anyway, as the windows were longer and more frequent, there was no more intrusive thoughts.

I think for now, distraction and acceptance is the best thing to do.

I have found a mindfulness meditation specific for intrusive thoughts, and it helped me a lot. I try to do it everyday.

 

Je pense à toi très fort! On lâche pas, on va y arriver!

 

Anne-Marie

[Erell]

I feel an amazing sense of gratitude as I read your posts : THANK YOU ☀️

 

As I'm regularly wondering if Im trying enough, when I see that some people manage to work for example, regularly wondering if I should force myself more but in the meantime feel like often forcing just lead to more symptoms, it is very nice to read that you too find that Exposure can be too much.

 

And I agree : when symptoms fade, you don't even need Exposure because your CNS is simply able to do more.

I realise that : last time I felt better, on 1th January, I felt bored. And it was weird to feel bored. Because usually I don't have time to feel bored, I just feel overwhelmed.

And while feeling bored, I decided to call an old friend and take a walk with her. I wasn't thinking about Exposure, I was thinking about doing something that I wanted to do.

 

 

It's probably because I'm in a very long "wave" since January, same day every day, housebound, that I feel a pressure to feel a change, to be able to do more.

 

So ok, no more pressure to expose myself. I'm ill, unfortunately suffering from Paws and doing my best everyday. Its not much but it's my best.

And I'll keep on surfing as best as I can until feeling bored again.

 

Edited April 19, 2021 by Erell

[Rosetta]

Are you unable to go for walks?  Do you live on a city or where you can’t avoid traffic and people to get from your house to a park?

[Erell]

23 minutes ago, Rosetta said:

Are you unable to go for walks?  Do you live on a city or where you can’t avoid traffic and people to get from your house to a park?

I'm lucky, and can take walks, I do it everyday, even if it's for 5 or 20 minutes, I need it.

And I'm also lucky because my parents live in the countryside, near a forest.

Almost everyday I go in the forest, walk, sit, listen to songbirds, watch insects, listen to the water sound in the little creek.

It's my safe place, my place to hide if needed, to cry if I don't want my family to hear me.

There are days when agoraphobia and terror spikes even in this "safe place" and I struggle to leave my room.

Other days where DR hits hard and the sky and the trees scare me, they look too weird. 

But I've started to hug them sometimes and it helps to ground.

Sometimes all the songbirds scare me and feels too much.

But still, I'm very lucky to have this place and my forest as been a lifesaver last months ☀️

It's the place where I try to ground/touch/smell/listen.

The place where I try to find energy and hope in nature, try to nurture myself to find the strenght to keep going.

 

(Oh I see that I might not use well the word "housebound". I consider the forest the same as the house as it is the garden of my parents'house.

I use "housebound" because I spend my days in the house and in the forest that goes with the house, I rarely manage to go elsewhere.

I'm very sorry if I've offended someone who lives in the city or don't have a garden and can't leave the house. It was not my intention and I'll be careful to not use this term in the future.)

Edited April 19, 2021 by Erell

[Heath]

@Erell as mimi79 says at different stages in wd symptoms different things help and some things do not. And then factor in we are all different. With me walks in the woods is always good if my physical energy is there. Most of time being busy and doing things with positive friends and family does help me. But at different times during wd worse symptoms, then rest and relaxation. And being alone helps but it is rare for me.  Erell just do what you can when you can in moving toward your normal life pre wd. Hang in there! 

[Heath]

@Erell oh yes laying down by a fast moving creek or river 👍 my favorite !!

[Sebas]

"I'm sorry for not answering earlier to your suggestions. 

I received many different advices and it was a bit triggering for my panicky mind."

 

Take small steps, one thing at a time. Start with least drastic then afterwards (re)evaluate and restore if necessary 🍀🦋🌤. 

[Rosetta]

Wow.  How wonderful to have that place.  Yet, I understand what you mean as I went through a period when leaving home was very hard.  I was terrified even to walk outside.  DR is scary until one gets used to it or some healing has happened that makes it less scary.  
 

Traffic is very upsetting for me.  That is not because of WD.  I think it is upsetting for everyone whether they realize that or not, but while in WD? Ugh.  It’s very lucky that you do not have to walk down a busy street to find nature.  Being able to walk in that forest will heal you.
 

I live on a dirt road and have a 56 acre park right across the road.  It’s lovely.  There are so many oak trees and sycamores and a year-round stream, but there are other people there.  If there is a cloud cover, I can hear the freeway.  The roads around the park are busy and do not have a low speed limit, except mine, but it is a little slice of heaven, nonetheless.  
 

Long waves take a toll.  Of course, you are doing enough.  Resting, walking and eating.  That is all you need to do.  I mean this.  If you feel better, you could do something extra as long as you are careful to not over do.  Let your brain heal.  That’s all you should be responsible to do.  My husband has been very good about taking care of me and telling me to “cool it.”  He understands what happened.  I’m very grateful for that.  I try to do things for him when I can, and, fortunately, that is more often these days.  There was a time when I couldn’t do much of anything, and if I tried, I made a mess, hurt myself, had a meltdown or all three!

 

All my best, Rosetta
 

 

[mstimc]

On 4/19/2021 at 12:53 PM, Erell said:

I'm very sorry if I've offended someone who lives in the city or don't have a garden and can't leave the house. It was not my intention and I'll be careful to not use this term in the future.)

Hi Erell

 

No offense taken!  😃  We live in an apartment in the middle of town but we can walk to the beach in about 15 minutes, and we often spend two hours walking along the shore.  Anything that connects us with nature is helpful.

 

Part of anxiety and OCD is blaming yourself for "offenses" that don't really exist.  You clearly didn't mean your comment in an offensive way and I think we call get that.  Look at it as another opportunity for some self-compassion and kindness.  Positive thoughts going your way!

 

[wantrelief]

Hello lovely Erell - I have to agree with @Rosetta that you are doing what you can do. Your body/brain knows what it is doing and you will naturally do more when you feel like you want to. You also do so well using coping tools to get yourself through your days. There isn't much more that can be done....your brain is working hard in the background healing itself and getting back to homeostasis. Hang in there, Erell, you are doing really really well (even if you don't feel that yourself).

 

[Erell]

Thank you dears, really, I love reading you ❤

And thank you for thinking that I'm doing well : while living with people who would like me To do more, it is nice to read you.

I try my best to do things for them, but often don't manage to do all I would like and might look like a lazy person for those around me.

What a journey we are living right ?

 

@wantrelief : thank you dear, you're lovely for reminding me that my brain is doing his best to heal ❤

 

@mstimc : self love and compassion, thank you for the reminder. And glad you were not offended 😉

And you re absolutely right, I'm always afraid of hurting people, need to work on this...!

 

@Rosetta oh I'm so glad to read that your husband is supportive, this is a gift and you deserve it ☀️

And you made me laugh ...yes, try to do more, then mess while cooking, hurt yourself with the heath, then cry because of it...know this very well 😉

 

@Sebas : thank you, small steps ❤

I also know that you are thinking about a possible bridge to Prozac. 

Please don't think I'm the only example : I have been unlucky, but there are also examples of people it helped. 

Feel free to reach if you want.

 

@Heath : thankyou ! I'll send you big healing vibes while listening to the creek ❤

 

 

-------

 

I'm struggling a lot with intrusive thoughts and impulses. 

I'm so tired of being afraid of myself.

I'm not an angry person and don't even feel anger, and yet I have terrible ideas/thoughts and impulses.

I'm doing my best to Navigate with this since last summer. Had relief in December and thought it was gone for good ❤

And tortured 24/7 by the fear of loosing control, going insane and being a danger. 

It's like a constant feeling of going insane, mental but also very physical. 

 

I know that these are illusions from a destabilised CNS, never had this issue before my AD switch.

And yet I need someone telling me that I will never act, that I can't loose ground or touch with reality, that people stay in control even in WD. 

I don't manage to practice acceptance while feeling like it could lead me to madness.

 

How to deal with uncertainty, with the possibility of going insane ?

 

 

Edited April 24, 2021 by Erell

[Longroadhome]

You’re not going mad @Erell . Many many times I have felt the same. 
 

if you have not already I urge you to have a telephone consultation with Baylissa. You can do this without being a member . Just  login on her web baylissa.com and through to consultations. 
there’s no one better qualified to reassure you that the feelings you are having are normal in WD. Many of us have similar. 
you will not go insane. They will subside. 
 

I understand completely the terror of being consumed by WD impulses and thoughts. Please know you will NOT Lose it. It is the WD brain talking. Don’t be fooled. Nobody has ever gone insane from

WD.
you’re parents will not understand how could they? 
do whatever is needed to get through each day. 
and if that means doing very little so be it. 

Let  the thoughts come don’t fight them. It’s an injury to your brain and the symptoms is the brain in the process of putting things right.  
take 1 minute 1 hour 1day at a time. Get up each morning and put 1 foot in front of the other. Keep pushing forward . x
 

 

[Sebas]

Dear Erell,

 

I'm following your topic in the first place to help you through this tough period 🦋👊. Indeed i've also been reading about bridging, the specific topic alto made in 2011 is very helpful. Do you think you were stable (no withdrawal symptoms) when you started bridging in april 2020? I really think you should very carefully consider small adjustments. I changed my diet last week (avoid spices) and immediately noticed some positive changes. Have you considered tapering down primrose oil a little bit? Perhaps just a quarter, then evaluate. Like alto said the prozac could also be somewhat overwhelming. In bridging topic (p.3) i read a post about 5mg being almost as effective as 10 or 20mg but less side effects. I also understand you sticking to holding strategy after 8 months. Thats why i suggested tapering supplement cause it might be least drastic for short term. Like longroad said don't believe too much in your current thoughts cause they're misleading and just cognitive symptoms. I know from experience how real they may seem. Accept and ignore.

 

Have faith 🌲 (tree for hugging)

[mstimc]

2 hours ago, Erell said:

And yet I need someone telling me that I will never act, that I can't loose ground or touch with reality, that people stay in control even in WD. 

That's your anxiety and OCD demanding you pay attention to give them power.  They are selfish and want all your energy.  In WD, our thoughts take on a power of their own, but they are only as powerful as we let them be.  I sometimes suffer from episodes of heavy guilt over some pretty trivial things in the past, and I need to remind myself these thoughts don't make me a bad person.   I think we've all faced the fear of losing our minds during WD but you won't.  Try to remind yourself its your thoughts jumbled by and exaggerated by WD.  You will recover!

[cathnz]

16 hours ago, Erell said:

Thank you dears, really, I love reading you ❤

And thank you for thinking that I'm doing well : while living with people who would like me To do more, it is nice to read you.

I try my best to do things for them, but often don't manage to do all I would like and might look like a lazy person for those around me.

What a journey we are living right ?

 

@wantrelief : thank you dear, you're lovely for reminding me that my brain is doing his best to heal ❤

 

@mstimc : self love and compassion, thank you for the reminder. And glad you were not offended 😉

And you re absolutely right, I'm always afraid of hurting people, need to work on this...!

 

@Rosetta oh I'm so glad to read that your husband is supportive, this is a gift and you deserve it ☀️

And you made me laugh ...yes, try to do more, then mess while cooking, hurt yourself with the heath, then cry because of it...know this very well 😉

 

@Sebas : thank you, small steps ❤

I also know that you are thinking about a possible bridge to Prozac. 

Please don't think I'm the only example : I have been unlucky, but there are also examples of people it helped. 

Feel free to reach if you want.

 

@Heath : thankyou ! I'll send you big healing vibes while listening to the creek ❤

 

 

-------

 

I'm struggling a lot with intrusive thoughts and impulses. 

I'm so tired of being afraid of myself.

I'm not an angry person and don't even feel anger, and yet I have terrible ideas/thoughts and impulses.

I'm doing my best to Navigate with this since last summer. Had relief in December and thought it was gone for good ❤

And tortured 24/7 by the fear of loosing control, going insane and being a danger. 

It's like a constant feeling of going insane, mental but also very physical. 

 

I know that these are illusions from a destabilised CNS, never had this issue before my AD switch.

And yet I need someone telling me that I will never act, that I can't loose ground or touch with reality, that people stay in control even in WD. 

I don't manage to practice acceptance while feeling like it could lead me to madness.

 

How to deal with uncertainty, with the possibility of going insane ?

 

 

@Erell my heart aches for you. I have been following your progress, as your story is very similar to mine. Although I didn't do a Prozac bridge... instead my psych cold switched me from Paxil to Mirtazapine nearly 2 years ago. It was then that my already crumbling world (due to Paxil poopout), hit a new low and I have been suffering from akathisia and all the other mental torture you mention. They added Quetiapine and Benzos for a month or so to try and dampen things but that has no effect. I too have been frozen in fear not knowing what to do... questioning whether all of this horror is from the sudden cessation of Paxil, or rather, the Mirtazapine disagreeing with me. Always tortured in the question of do I hold (incase its paxil wd and will settle) or do I need to get off this new poison asap (and hope that once I reduce symptoms will ease). Knowing that if I choose the wrong path, I could descend further into hell. I have no room to go further down. I'm struggling with grief over my mums Alzheimers... I have next to no coping skills. There's no room for error. So I feel for you so very very much. I'm there with you. I did have one brief moment of hope yesterday (like you I seek success stories)... I watched a video on the FB group Inner Compass Conversations (check them out, they're great)... it was a video by Chris Page on healing while still on meds. It gave me hope. Check it out.

Sending healing vibes that we can find our way out of hell soon xxx

[getofflex]

On 4/19/2021 at 2:53 PM, Erell said:

Almost everyday I go in the forest, walk, sit, listen to songbirds, watch insects, listen to the water sound in the little creek.

It's my safe place, my place to hide if needed, to cry if I don't want my family to hear me.

Oh sweet Erell, that sounds wonderful.  I live in a city and wish I had a place like this.  I do drive out to the country for hikes in the woods when I can, and it is wonderful.  My heart hurts to hear what you are going through.  I continue to pray for you and think about you.  Please, please don't give up.  Someday, this will get better!  

[Rosetta]

((Erell)). I’m sorry you cry.  Do you feel better afterward?

[Longroadhome]

@Erell

 

checking in you don’t have to reply just know I’m thinking of you

Keep going 

 

Keep using your coping skills

 

You managed yesterday and you can manage today

 

A beautiful tomorrow awaits you ..  peace tranquility and happiness

   

 

 

[Erell]

Hello, thank you for your support ❤

 

I Didn't reply earlier because my mind would have asked the same questions  😉

So I've printed posts and read them again when I feel like I can't keep going or when I feel like going insane.

Thank you very much, your insight and support really does help ❤

 

I'm not gonna lie, it's hard, really hard.

I spend all day long with awful thoughts and feelings. 

I just do my best to change the channel, walk, cook, be in the garden, breath, try to find safe spaces in my body, do my best to not react, focus on the sunny side of the street.

But everyday is like being kept in a horror movie, it's like if my mind is constantly torturing myself, playing over and over the worst movies, painfully hitting me with the worst.

I know all these are just illusions from an injuried CNS but it constantly feels so real.

Before my switch I didn't know someone could be tortured like this by his own mind.

 

I cry sometimes when everything is too much, and it does sometimes help.

 

I've also carefully tapered my Evening primrose oil dose from 1000mg to 500mg. 

I don't know if it has made a difference, I don't think so.

But it does feel good to lowering something.

 

I'm thinking about perhaps doing a 1% drop of my Prozac dose soon.

 

I'm really grateful for all those who share their stories and experience on SA, it really does help to hang on.

 

Take care ☀️

 

 

-----------

 

I just realised there was actually an important survey. If you feel strong enough, please take a look :

 

2021 IMPORTANT WITHDRAWAL SURVEY, PLEASE PARTICIPATE: https://uelpsych.eu.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_0AR9IsQ61jsiXBk

Edited May 14, 2021 by Erell

[wantrelief]

4 hours ago, Erell said:

I spend all day long with awful thoughts and feelings. 

Oh Erell I am so sorry you are suffering so.  I know it sounds impossible but it will pass.  I felt the same as you are describing and it did change.

 

Whenever I read your posts, I greatly admire all you are doing to help yourself despite feeling so unwell.....it is very impressive!

 

Keep hanging on as you are doing.....you are going to okay.

 

Sending you lots of hugs ~ WR 💗

[Fallensoul]

I'm sorry to hear it is still so bad.

I also have a big dip after the last two paroxetine dose drops.

 

Crying sometimes help, I hope you start seeing better times soon, it cann't stay like this forever. Have faith!

 

[Nomansland]

Hello @Erell,

 

i want to say thank you for helping so many suffering members here in the forum.

 

Please take care of yourself in these tough times. I know you will get through

and come out in a much, much better place!

 

(And thank you for sharing the international withdrawal survey! Its an important next step, with highly respected withdrawal researchers, to make antidepressant withdrawal public around the globe. We need everyone's story.)

 

Greetings<3

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

2021 IMPORTANT WITHDRAWAL SURVEY, PLEASE PARTICIPATE: https://uelpsych.eu.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_0AR9IsQ61jsiXBk

[Hanna72]

Thinking of you dear @Erell❤️

[mstimc]

Hi Erell

Joining everyone else wishing you peace and healing.  Sending positive thoughts your way !

[getofflex]

(((((((((( Erell )))))))) sending you huge cyber hugs, love, and care.  I'm really praying for you.  Please, hang in there, and don't give up!  I wish I was there with you and could bring you soup, and cover you with a blanket, and hug you.   

Edited May 14, 2021 by getofflex

[sunnysideup69]

Sending you lots of love and support, @Erell. Everything will change.

Big hugs xxx

[Sebas]

You did good tapering down the PRO. Sometimes we have to see what knobs we can turn (as in: minor adjustments, then evaluate and/or adjust) for some relief. Since you're taking both fluoxetine, PRO and diazepam and possibly still in Paxil WD, it's difficult to predict which step would provide relief. Possible conflicts have to be minimalised. Although you were reluctant, nothing seems to have worsened and indeed CNS now has (just a bit) less to process. Keep going.

 

A change in fluoxetine normally takes some time before you notice anything (weeks instead of days) (cause of the long halflife). Keep that in mind.

 

Wishing you lots of strength from the Netherlands, tout a l'heure mon amie 😉

[Longroadhome]

@Erell

its so hard to see what lies at the other end of the tunnel when you’re  in the middle and it’s pitch black way up ahead..  When we’re driving through we can’t stop we have to rely on beacons of light carrying us forward  in order to safely navigate our way to the other end and out into the sunshine and safety. 
if you were to imagine your WD as the tunnel which part would you be in right now ? 
Well here’s the thing Erell .. it really doesn’t matter  as there’s only one way through and that’s by continually moving forward.
Look in your rear view mirror and see the navigation lights behind you. Look ahead and those same lights are there ahead to guide you. 
  Each one of those steering you towards the the end of the tunnel and beautiful forever sunshine. 
 

You are those lights behind you. You are those lights ahead of you. Now trust in that  light to carry you forward to a beautiful tomorrow x

[Erell]

Hello dear friends, 

 

I don't reply early to your posts because I try to not seek for reassurance too often and learn to find all I need inside my own self. Unlearn helplessness and learn to discover the strenght and skills I have inside  
So I try to post not more than once a week on my thread.
But I wanted to thank you : even if I don't reply, I love reading your encouragements, and even print them ❤️ 

I have read stories of people who took two years to stabilise after several changes, so I understand it can take a very long time.
I've received many different advices between holding or starting a micro taper off Prozac as it is not helping, I'm still hesitating. So, holding as long as I don't feel strong enough to test the water.

 

What never cease to amaze me is the appearance of new symptoms : these days I struggle a lot with weird and intense irritability. I don't think there are specific triggers or reasons, it's more like "irritability attack" without a reason, it feels iatrogenic.

It's strange because it seems to spike everyday around 11am-noon.
I do my best to accept it and isolate when I need to, but have to admit this new symptom can be very distressing, especially while already struggling with intrusive thoughts and fearing to act.

 

On 5/14/2021 at 3:50 PM, wantrelief said:

Whenever I read your posts, I greatly admire all you are doing to help yourself despite feeling so unwell.....it is very impressive!

 

Thank you, your words are very comforting ❤️ I don't know if it's impressive...you know this absolute need to "do something", the emergency to do something to feel better ? 
Well, I just try to redirect this urge towards coping skills, because that's all I can do for now. 

But it's not easy. I would like to do more, but I'm still so agoraphobic, I just can do my best to try distract in my house.

Actually, your words are a good occasion to share my coping skills : rather than sharing my symptoms, I'll share the tools I try to practice, hope it might help someone : 

 

- Gratitude : I had stopped to practice gratitude because I was tired of not getting better. But I've started again this week and I think it makes a difference. Every evening, when I go to bed and start to fear the night, I focus on gratitude. Even simple things can be positive : the sunshine, having some appetite, ...

 

- Postive affirmations : the trick is, I think, to feel comfortable with your affirmations. If I'm feeling confident, I might use sentences like "I'm feeling more and more calm"/ "I'm healing more an more everyday", ... . But if things are too rough, I don't manage to believe these thoughts, so I use more simple affirmations like "I'm going to be ok, I'm going to be ok".
I read them many times during my bedtime routine and during the day, this way they print in my mind.

 

- Using my hands, my body. I don't often manage to distract while staying still, so I find activities to use my hands : gardening, walking, origami, ...anything that involves my body helps to distract or change the channel. 

 

- "Healing meditation" : I've found on youtube "healing meditations" where you visualise a healing light or energy coming in your body. I like it.

- Visualisation : same idea, I listen to audio and try to visualise myself healed, feeling peaceful. If I can't do it while staying still, I do it while walking, pretending I'm healed.

 

- ....

 

Take care everybody, and thank you for your support, really ! ❤️ 

[mstimc]

15 minutes ago, Erell said:

rather than sharing my symptoms, I'll share the tools I try to practice, hope it might help someone : 

These are great coping tool, Erell, and over time they will help reduce and eventually eliminate your symptoms.   There were many times during my WD and recovery I found myself repeating my affirmations throughout the day just to get through it.  Eventually, these positive practices will push the negative thought patterns out.  

 

I think irritability is a natural consequence of the frustrations we feel with our situation.  I, too. found myself much less patient during WD.   We just want it to be over with, and we get short-tempered when we feel we're not making progress.  But its temporary and will pass away, as will all your symptoms.

 

Thinking of you from Portugal!

[Hanna72]

Dear @Erell

Your resilience and determination amazes me every single time you post. What an amazing quality to have and I truly believe it will benefit you in the long run even if it might not seem like it now. 
About testing the waters with dosage change, do so only when you are ready. Your health and well-being needs always to come first. I know it’s scary, who wouldn’t be afraid after having been thrown into such a horrific situation. 

I need to remind myself often that this is not a race but a matter of patience and time,

 

Your strong and helpful presence on this forum has helped many including myself, so my gratitude goes out to you dear Erell today 🥰

 

[arbor]

(((((Erell)))))              The symptom of irritability is so very, very hard!!!!!!!!  (Hard to stay in our own skin😬)  Hugs to your irritability as well💗

[getofflex]

4 hours ago, Erell said:

I don't reply early to your posts because I try to not seek for reassurance too often and learn to find all I need inside my own self. Unlearn helplessness and learn to discover the strenght and skills I have inside  

I'm working on this very same thing myself, especially in my physical non online life.

 

4 hours ago, Erell said:

I have read stories of people who took two years to stabilise after several changes, so I understand it can take a very long time.

I'm glad to know this.  What incredible patience this recovery journey can take.  

 

4 hours ago, Erell said:

I've received many different advices between holding or starting a micro taper off Prozac as it is not helping, I'm still hesitating. So, holding as long as I don't feel strong enough to test the water.

Sounds like a good plan.  I would do the same.  

 

Look at the amazing coping skills you are learning through this painful withdrawal.  You will come out of this with a deep inner strength and wisdom that few other people ever possess.  I, too, find it helpful to do things with my hands (cooking, gardening, cleaning, knitting) when I am in a wave and my brain is limited in it's function.  

 

I continue to think about you and pray for you every day.  Stay the course, and hang in there my friend!  😍💜  This too shall pass!  It may take time, but eventually it will come to an end. 

Edited May 23, 2021 by getofflex