Vegalia: Escitalopram and Lysanxia ( prazepam)

[Vegalia]

16 minutes ago, Shep said:

 

Which drug are you speaking about?

Hello Shep

 

Escitalopram. 

I know I tapered it brutally. That's why I went on this forum. 

Even if I know that it is possible that I have consequences of benzo W/D too. 

 

(Last prazepam taper 2 September - 0,10 mg x 3, and before :  since month of may, I tapered 2% current dose every 21 days : usual protocol of French forum) 

 

Thank you if you had an advice. 

I think that antidepressant W/D Is the worse I have between Antidepressant and prazepam. 

 

If you don't know, I understand. 

 

Thank you

 

Vega. 

 

 

 

[Shep]

20 minutes ago, Shep said:

 

Which drug are you speaking about? 

 

9 minutes ago, Vegalia said:

Escitalopram. 

 

Please see my post here:

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/21525-vegalia-escitalopram-and-lysanxia-prazepam/page/11/?tab=comments#comment-463751

[Vegalia]

46 minutes ago, Shep said:

 

 

Please see my post here:

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/21525-vegalia-escitalopram-and-lysanxia-prazepam/page/11/?tab=comments#comment-463751

Yes Shep I remember it well. 

 

I didn't made any change since and it is really really worse, like if I was cold turkey. Physical symptoms (back, neck, jaw, head , brain bad sensations : aches, contractions, burnings, sensations of electricity  tremors) and  neuro- emotions are horrible. It is difficult to hold in my legs : muscles weakness, tremors

Arms and legs are burning too but I can bear it. 

Sensibility to light and noises again : it had disappeared. 

Depression again  : it had reduced. 

 

I have the worst symptoms I have ever had. 

 

If I understand your point of view has not changed. 

 

I forced me to walk 20 mn today, really hard but I did it. 

 

Thank you so much Shep! 

 

Vega. 

[Altostrata]

Vegalia, I believe all these tips you're sharing with the French forum should be helpful:

 

Everyone here has a trail of mistakes that brought them to this place, please do not blame yourself.

 

I can see you're trying to find a solution in your history in this post:

 

You need to attach your drug intake for each of the events you list. For example, what combination of drugs were you taking in July, August, September, and October? You've tried to explain, but the detail is too confusing for me to follow. You've made changes almost continually. You will need to put whatever events you consider to be significant in an easy-to-understand chronological form.

 

Even so, your symptoms may not be resolved by the perfect drug recipe. It could be that over the months, your digestive system has become more sensitive or experienced more erosion from the smoking.

 

I can understand why you would want to make a relatively simple change in your escilatopram dose rather than the more difficult task of quitting smoking. But because of the possibility some of your symptoms are from smoking, whatever antidepressant withdrawal symptoms you might have are unclear. If you subtracted the stomach-burning symptom, nausea, and some of the pain from your symptom pattern, what would be left? Can you try doing that by reducing smoking?

 

I can't think of a way to resolve your current situation other than 1) Keep your drug intake consistent, stop changing it; 2) Help your nervous system calm down with gentle exercise; 3) Work on the symptoms that may not be drug-related, such reducing smoking to lessen the stomach-burning and pain. As you know, long-term smoking has bad neurological effects, too.

 

After you are a few months off cigarettes, we can look at your symptom pattern again.

 

By the way, my brother was a heavy cigarette smoker all his adult life. He lost a lung to cancer a couple of years ago. The cancer may have just recurred. I asked him why he continued to smoke after our mother, also a heavy smoker, lost a lung to cancer. He said he thought it would never affect him. Please do not make this mistake.

[rola]

5 hours ago, Vegalia said:

 

 

I forced me to walk 20 mn today, really hard but I did it. 

 

 

 

Vega. 

cool c'est bien vega 😉😘

[Vegalia]

2 hours ago, Altostrata said:

Vegalia, I believe all these tips you're sharing with the French forum should be helpful:

 

Everyone here has a trail of mistakes that brought them to this place, please do not blame yourself.

 

I can see you're trying to find a solution in your history in this post:

 

You need to attach your drug intake for each of the events you list. For example, what combination of drugs were you taking in July, August, September, and October? You've tried to explain, but the detail is too confusing for me to follow. You've made changes almost continually. You will need to put whatever events you consider to be significant in an easy-to-understand chronological form.

 

Even so, your symptoms may not be resolved by the perfect drug recipe. It could be that over the months, your digestive system has become more sensitive or experienced more erosion from the smoking.

 

I can understand why you would want to make a relatively simple change in your escilatopram dose rather than the more difficult task of quitting smoking. But because of the possibility some of your symptoms are from smoking, whatever antidepressant withdrawal symptoms you might have are unclear. If you subtracted the stomach-burning symptom, nausea, and some of the pain from your symptom pattern, what would be left? Can you try doing that by reducing smoking?

 

I can't think of a way to resolve your current situation other than 1) Keep your drug intake consistent, stop changing it; 2) Help your nervous system calm down with gentle exercise; 3) Work on the symptoms that may not be drug-related, such reducing smoking to lessen the stomach-burning and pain. As you know, long-term smoking has bad neurological effects, too.

 

After you are a few months off cigarettes, we can look at your symptom pattern again.

 

By the way, my brother was a heavy cigarette smoker all his adult life. He lost a lung to cancer a couple of years ago. The cancer may have just recurred. I asked him why he continued to smoke after our mother, also a heavy smoker, lost a lung to cancer. He said he thought it would never affect him. Please do not make this mistake.

Thank you Altostrata, thank you so much, 

 

Before to take benzo,  reduced cigarettes to 5-7 a day in intention to stop... All my work time I didn't smoked with no problem, only at house. 

My mother died of cancer of bladder which can related with cigarette, even if she stooped to smoke she was 40 years old. . My father has bowel cancer which can be in relation with cigarette and alcohol. I'm angry to smoke  you know... To smoke is now compulsive : I smoke but don't appreciate it, like a obsessional compulsive trouble... 

 

I already stop smoking 5 years. Stupid addiction, I know. I promised my father to stop smoking and a friend of my age (41 years old) who fight with cancer ( but not in relation with tobacco.,) 

 

I will reduce slowly in first time. I have a plan. -;1 cigarette a week like Shep Sayed could be good. To fast = to much stress. 

 

If I can't walk I have find exercises to do. I made today because my legs muscles are a catastrophe : they have reduce a lot, because of not enough activity since 3 months. I have made a fight to be able to walk with my mother: several surgeries and hard treatments and it was not sure that I can walk one day. . I began to walk I was 2 years old : victory. I  can always walk even if I can't run anymore since long time. I must not forget this and assure me to walk so old it will be possible. 

 

 

--> good motivations. 

 

I make gentle exercises for nervous system bevery days  

 

I will try to answer you more clear tomorrow. To  be concise and not say details is a difficult  : it is my personality and it comes of my literary studies too : sometimes a problem...Not natural to be concise for me : I will do my best, I promise. 

 

I am sorry for your brother and your mother  Altostrata. 

 

Thank you so much. 

 

Vega. 

 

 

[Vegalia]

Hello, 

 

2018 :

 

29 August : Venlafaxine 75 mg XR, clotiazépam 5 mg x 2  

-Enervate

19 September: Venlafaxine 75 mg XR, clotiazépam 5 mg x 2  

- No more enervate

November Sertraline 50 mg, prazepam 10 mg x 3 to 9,5 x 3 : 

- enervate and drowsiness after each dose of prazepam during 3 hours (pattern : good at wake, drowsiness, enervate, drowsiness, enervate, drowsiness) 

- beginning of arms burnings and aches every days and legs burnings and aches sometimes. 

- ecchymosis

- visual problems

- recover normal sleep : +/- 7 h, frequent naps

 

December 2018 to middle April 2019 : 

Sertraline taper 50 mg to 25 mg gradually, prazepam 9,5 x 3 to 7,52 x 3 : 

- enervate : less and less and no more

- drowsiness more and more, frequent naps, problems of memory and concentration more and more. 

- Ecchymosis less and less and stop. 

- arms aches and burnings less and less

- legs aches and burnings very rare

- visual problems : less and less

- Other symptoms like nausea, dizziness, head ache but less and less

= W/D normal cf Brassmonkey explications. 

 

Middle April to middle June 2019 : 

Sertraline 25 mg, prazepam 7,52 mg x 3 to 6 mg x 3 :

- drowsiness lees and less, recover of memory and concentration=80 %

- arms aches and burnings less and less

- legs acches and burnings: stop

- nausea : stop

- Dizziness : very rare. 

- visual problems : stop

- Other symptoms but not during. 

= W/D normal cf Brassmonkey explications. 

 

Middle June to middle July 2019 : 

Sertraline 25 mg, prazepam 6 mg to 5,145 mg x 3:

- drowsiness very little, recover of memory and concentration 90 %

 

- arms aches and burnings less and less

- Other little symptoms but not during. 

- Enervate again a little and it increase. 

 

 

15 July to 31 July 2019 : 

Escitalopram 5 mg to 2,25 mg, prazepam 5,145 mg x 3 :

 - tired  and after 3 days enervate again--> reduce fast escitalopram : less enervate

 - arms aches and burnings : stop

 

 

I will finish later : I go to psychiatrist  🙄

 

Vega

 

 

[Vegalia]

August 2019 :

Escitalopram 2,25 mg to 1,50 mg, prazepam 5,145 mg to 4,94 mg x 3 :

 

- less and less enervate

- unstable neuro-emotions :  very tired, anxious sometimes : new

 

- a lot of sweat : new

- diarrhea from middle of August during one  month non stop : new

 

- headache : return

 

- sleep +/- 6 h

 

September 2019 : 

Escitalopram 1,50 mg to 1,25 mg and to 1,38 mg and 1,50 mg, prazepam 4,94 mg x 3 to 4,645 mg x 3 and 4,75 mg x 3 : 

 

- no enervate, anxious sometimes.

- hard fatigue, lethargy

 

- depression : new

- a lot of dreams : new

- contractions muscles of back, nape : new

- sensations of electricity in spine and head, brain zaps, headache : new

- intrusive ideas : new

- problems of equilibrium : new

- muscles of legs weakness : new

 

- visual problems : return  

- sensibility to light and noises : return (had in July 2018) 

- pancreas burning : return ( had in July 2018) 

- Nausea : return but all days (had no more since may 2019) 

 

- sweat : less and stop. 

 

- sleep +/- 6 h.

 

October 2019 

Escitalopram 1,50 mg, prazepam 4,75 mg x 3 :

 

- Horrible neuro-emotions, internal Akathisy, crisis : new

 Depression : more and more

- hard anxiety : return

 

- Hypnagogic hallucinations : new

- a lot of dreams : new

- back, nape, very contracted and burnings : new

 - sensations I will faint : new

 

- arms and legs burnings : return (had no more since middle July) 

- stomach burnings : return (had in june-july 2018 after taking anti inflammatories) 

 

- sensations of electricity in spine and head, brain zaps, headache : more and more

 

- fog in brain  =

- a little DP/ DR  =

- intrusive ideas  =

- sensibility to light and noises =

- Visual problems =

- problems of equilibrium =

 

- muscles of legs weakness : less and stop. 

- pancreas burning : stop

 

- sleep +/- 6 h, sometimes bad sleep. 

 

 

November 2019 : 

Escitalopram 1,50 mg, prazepam 4,75 mg x 3 :

 

- Horrible neuro-emotions, internal Akathisy, crisis, But : less depression, less anxiety. 

 

- Little tremors in lips, tongue, jaw : new

- Sensations of tremor in head and brain : new

 

- stomach burnings : more and more

- back, nape, very contracted and burnings until head : more and more

- arms and legs burnings : more and more

 

- intrusive ideas =

 

-  sensibility to light and noises : less and less and very slight. 

- Hypnagogic hallucinations : less and stop. 

- problems of equilibrium : less and stop. 

- Sensation of electricity in spine and head, brain zaps : stop

- Visual problems : stop

- Dreams : normal

 

- sleep 4-5 h, sometimes very bad sleep. 

 

December : 2019 : 

Escitalopram 1,50 mg, prazepam 4,75 mg x 3 :

 

- Neuro-emotions : more stable, less depression 

 

- jaw muscles contractions : new

 

- Hypnagogic hallucinations : return

- visual problems :  return 

- fog in brain : return  

- sweat sometimes  : return  

 

- sensibility to light and noises : more and more

- stomach burnings :  more and more

- back, nape burnings until head : more and more

- arms and legs burnings : more and more

- little tremors in lips, tongue, jaw : more and more

- Sensations of tremor in head and brain : more and more

 

- intrusive ideas =

- bruxism = 

 

- back, nape, very contracted  : less

 

- a little DP/ DR : rare

- fog in brain : stop

 

- sleep 5 h, less bad sleep. 

 

January  2020 : 

Escitalopram 1,50 mg, prazepam 4,75 mg x 3 :

 

- Horrible neuro-emotions, internal Akathisy, crisis, depression : return

 

 

- tinglings in legs : new

 

- problems of equilibrium : return

- muscles of legs weakness : return

 

 

- sensibility to light and noises : more and more

- stomach burnings :  more and more

- back, nape, very contracted and burnings until head : more and more

- arms and legs burnings : more and more

- little tremors in lips, tongue, jaw : more and more

- Sensations of tremor in head and brain : more and more

- jaw muscles contractions : more and more

 

- intrusive ideas =

- bruxism = 

- visual problems =

- little heart palpitations on evening=

- Hypnagogic hallucinations=

- sweat =

 

- stomach burning : a little less

 - a little DP/ DR : rare

 

- sleep 5-6 h, bad sleep sometimes. 

 

*****

Very cold often since September. 

 

Answer don't needed  if  nothing new. 

 

Thank you so much. 

 

 

Vega

 

 

[Vegalia]

Hello, 

 

I wrote a wrong information : 

 

 

 

2018 :

 

 

*29 August : 

Venlafaxine 75 mg XR : 8.30 am, clotiazépam 5 mg x 2  11 am and 11 pm

-Enervate

 

*19 September:

venlafaxine 37,5 mg XR : 8.30 am, clotiazépam 5 mg x 2  9 am and 9 pm(schedule gradually changed) 

- No more enervate

 

*November

Sertraline 50 mg : 8.30 am, prazepam 10 mg x 3 to 9,5 x 3 at 9 am, 3 pm, 9 pm

- enervate and drowsiness after each dose of prazepam during 3 hours (pattern : good at wake, drowsiness, enervate, drowsiness, enervate, drowsiness) 

- beginning of arms burnings and aches every days and legs burnings and aches sometimes. 

- ecchymosis

- visual problems

- recover normal sleep : +/- 7 h, frequent naps

 

 

*December 2018 to middle April 2019 : 

Sertraline taper 50 mg to 25 mg gradually : 8.30 am, prazepam 9,5 x 3 to 7,52 x 3  at 9 am, 3 pm, 9 pm :

- enervate : less and less and no more

- drowsiness more and more, frequent naps, problems of memory and concentration more and more. 

- Ecchymosis less and less and stop. 

- arms aches and burnings less and less

- legs aches and burnings very rare

- visual problems : less and less

- Other symptoms like nausea, dizziness, head ache but less and less

 

= W/D normal cf Brassmonkey explications. --> symptoms reduce

 

 

 

*Middle April to middle June 2019 

Sertraline 25 mg : 8.30 am, prazepam 7,52 mg x 3 to 6 mg x 3 at 9 am, 3 pm, 9 pm

- drowsiness lees and less, recover of memory and concentration=80 %

- arms aches and burnings less and less

- legs acches and burnings: stop

- nausea : stop

- Dizziness : very rare. 

- visual problems : stop

- Other symptoms but not during.

 

= W/D normal cf Brassmonkey explications.  --> symptoms reduce again

 

 

 

*Middle June to middle July 2019 : 

Sertraline 25 mg : 8.30 am, prazepam 6 mg to 5,145 mg x 3 at 9 am, 3 pm, 9 pm

- drowsiness very little, recover of memory and concentration 90 %

- arms aches and burnings less and less

- Other little symptoms but not during. 

- Enervate again a little and it increase. 

 

--> symptoms reduce again but enervate

 

 

*15 July to 31 July 2019 : 

Escitalopram 5 mg to 2,25 mg at 8.30 am, prazepam 5,145 mg x 3 at 9 pm, 3 pm, 9 pm

 - tired and after 3 days enervate again, very enervate--> reduce fast escitalopram : less enervate

 - arms aches and burnings : stop

 

 --> symptoms very little but more enervate

[Vegalia]

Hello,

 

A small passage to thank you for the time spent with me

 

I try to keep the strength I have left to try to see which hospital I can go to. It's dramatic for me to get there.

 

My nervous system was very damaged and I arrived too late on your forum unfortunately. I can no longer fight and can no longer function to survive my basic needs. I'll be honest, I updated to 1.60 mg 5 days ago. I broke down.

 

I am in an emergency because I no longer want to live. I have had a lot of great things in my life and I  what I want to is just die in peace now. 

 

It is too hard  psychically, psychologically and physically. To much symptoms and too hard 

 

I would only like one thing ... which I will not say....but I do not know how to go about it for it to succeed. 

 

I am not as strong as many of you. My life is wasted as well as that of those I love, starting with the man I love, love of my life. I can't bear see him suffering anymore. 

 

And I can't suffer so hard anyomore. I make self care all day hypnosis : almost all day, little exercises, I force me to walk... but...

 

Thank you to those who supported and helped me. You  couldn't make more for me. 

 

With lot of love ❤. 

 

Vega

[Altostrata]

Vegalia, are you reducing your cigarette smoking? Withdrawal from that can cause a lot of emotional discomfort, too.

 

Prazepam can cause fatigue and depression.

 

More chronological history after July 31, 2019 would be helpful.

[Vegalia]

1 hour ago, Altostrata said:

Vegalia, are you reducing your cigarette smoking? Withdrawal from that can cause a lot of emotional discomfort, too.

 

Prazepam can cause fatigue and depression.

 

More chronological history after July 31, 2019 would be helpful.

Hello Altostrata, 

 

1. I reduce but a little. 13/14. 15 before. 

 

2. Yes. I have things of agressivity by myself again too. 

 

3. Ok. It will be long for me to find it. I didn't made diary but I can find what I wrote on French forum tomorrow morning. It is late in France and I have a migraine. 

 

I have had information to the "best" Clinic I can find, even if I know it isn't a good solution. 

 

Thank you so much. I didn't thought have an answer. 

Thank you. 

 

Vega 

 

 

 

[Vegalia]

Hello,

 

I realize that the back pains started in June ... as well as some brain zaps ... : I have read what I wrote in French forum... 

 

For more chronological history after 31/07 it is very complicated, all is unstable and fluctuant : physical symptoms and neuro-emotions. 

 

August 2019 :

1 August : escitalopram 2,25 mg, prazepam 5,04 mg :

Already brain zaps, fog in brain, muscles spams back, spine and headaches : sensations of electricity some burnings in arms but bearable 

2 days long : drowsiness and enervate in the same time

6 August  same doses: 

feel me more stable with emotions, but hard tiredness. Physical symptoms in reduction. 

14 August same doses :

Enervate again ++  and a little drowsiness. Physical symptoms bearable : the sames + beginning of diarrhea. 

16 August escitalopram 1,75 mg, prazepam 5, 04mg :

Very enervate, return of unpleasant sensations in head, spine, I am cold, arms burnings, diarrhea

17 August same doses : 

less enervate, tiredness, anxiety. Feel me better after prazepam 9 pm, diarrhea

18 August same doses : 

Hard tiredness. No enervate, no anxiety, sensations I will faint, diarrhea

22 August escitalopram 1,75 mg, prazepam 4,94mg :

Aches increased gradually since 4 days, anxiety sometimes 4-5/10 v but not every days and not during.

good sleep.diarrhea 

22 August same doses :

enervate again end hard tiredness lethargy. Diarrhea. 

neuro-emotions unstable. 

22 August escitalopram 1,50 mg, prazepam 4,94mg :

drowsiness, anxiety, but feel better, can drive 35 km to see my father. Diarrhea. 

 

September 2019  

2 September escitalopram 1,50 mg, prazepam 4,79 mg :

Hard tiredness, physical symptoms in head  spine, back like electricity increase a lot since several days again. Bruxism. 

But feel me less tired after little reduce of prazepam. Diarrhea. 

9 September escitalopram 1,50 mg, prazepam 4,645 mg :

Symptoms reduce. 

12 September same doses : 

aches in pancreas

 

I finish later

 

Vega

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Vegalia]

 

 

September 2019  

2 September escitalopram 1,50 mg, prazepam 4,79 mg  x 3:

Hard tiredness, physical symptoms in head  spine, back like electricity increase a lot since several days again. Bruxism. 

But feel me less tired after little reduce of prazepam. Diarrhea. 

9 September escitalopram 1,50 mg, prazepam 4,645 mg x 3:

Symptoms reduce. 

12 September : 1,25 mg rmescitalopram, prazepam 4,645 mg x3

aches in pancreas  hard tiredness. 

19 September same doses:

I realize I make depression.  Aches in back, spine l, nape and unpleasant sensations in head increase. Burning of back, nape, spine. 

24 September : reinstatement escitalopram 1,38 mg,  prazepam 4,675 x 3:

21 September, same doses: 

return of anxiety, always aches in body, no more diarrhea, beginning of nausea,  beginning of sensibility lights and noises  neuro-emotions very unstable 

24 September : reinstatement : escitalopram 1,38 mg, prazepam 4,675 mg x 3:

less aches in body, but hard headache, sensations of electricity in head  always depression and nausea, neuro-emotions unstable

27 September : escitalopram 1,38 mg, prazepam : 4,75 mg x 3 : 

beginning of stomach burnings, anxiety. Aches... Depression neuro-emotions unstable, beginning of intrusive idea.. 

 

28 September : reinstatement : escitalopram 1,50 mg, prazepam 4,75 mg x 3:

same symptoms. 

 

Since end September : hard symptoms, more and more hard, less and less bearable. 

 

 

--> all is confused. 

Since July I made very bad things with drugs. 

 

I don't know how you can help me more. 

My state is worse and worse, with several days who I'm better, after I'm more worse, after a little better, like waves but in the wrong direction. 

 

I can't accept my situation, I try but I can't. Because I of the waves in the bad direction. 

 

My CNS has a lot of damage. I feel me like I'm crazy and definitely lost. My aches and  emotional spiral are too hard. Don't have strength to fight anymore. 

I can't live to alone and make basic self care anymore. For my companion it is too hard too take care of me. He is in depression. 

I think I have made error with prazepam today and 3 days ago but not sure... These two day maybe 4,75 mg x 2 an morning. A lot of confusion... I didn't want to do it... : confusion. I forget to record my doses when I always did

Since two days I have compulsive obsessional troubles. I never had. 

I think I can be violent and dangerous. 

 

 Kisses

 

Vega

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Vegalia]

Hi, 

 

Nobody can know but a bad reaction is possible.

Escitalopram reinstatement at 1,60 mg + what I did with prazepam (and don't wanted to do) 

Stomach less burning.... Nausea. 

Muscle a little less contracted. 

Neuro-emotions less awful. No anxiety! 🤨 I am more motivated to do activities but... 

But all body more and more burning ++++ since today, with tinglings, tremors. It is burning legs, aches and arms under the skin 9/10 or more? 

Little palpitations.

A little tinnitus (new) but not important. 

 

Head ache very very hard. 

I think I must see a doctor. 

 

Good luck to everybody! 

 

Kisses

 

Vega

[Vegalia]

Good evening, 

 

I have a question if someone had  a point of view. 

 

I have always very hard burnings in back, shoulders, nape, until temples, migraines. 

 

I have burnings in arms and burnings and now  itching under the skin of legs. However, Il don't have any rash. 

Could it be intolerance, adverse reaction? Or is it a frequent symptom? 

 

Thank you. 

 

Have a good day. 

 

Vega. 

[rola]

salut vega 

merci pour ton soutien ,j 'espère que tu vas un peu mieux .

bisous 

[Erell]

Coucou Vega

 

Comment vas tu?

 

❤

[Vegalia]

Coucou, 

 

Rien de bien nouveau... Toujours en enfer...Ça stagne avec des vagues et énormément de symptômes physiques : toujours ces brûlures corporelles et sensations désagréables dans la tête et troubles emotionnels très costauds. Retour d'akhatisie interne parfois. La liste serait tellement longue à faire... 

 

Je ne peux pas vivre vraiment à mon rythme pour me reposer entre toutes les prises à faire et mon conjoint... 

 

Je n'ai plus de troubles visuels. Je dors mieux : 6-7 h. Moins de brûlures d'estomac, mais beaucoup de soucis digestifs. 

 

J'ai beaucoup de moments de grosse asthénie voire confusion. 

 

Hier soir j'ai eu une quasi fenêtre de deux heures avec symptômes supportables. 

 

Je reduis doucement l-tryptophane. 1/4 de la gélule actuellement. Toujours à 1,60 mg d'escitalopram. 

 

J'ai enlevé le gluten et le lactose de mon alimentation. J'essaie de moins fumer avec plus ou moins de succès, on va dire que c'est plutôt plus que moins,  de succès.^^

 

Bisous. Courage à toi. 

 

Lætitia. 

 

[Erell]

Courage Vega, je pense à toi tous les jours ❤

[Vegalia]

Idem ❤️

[Vegalia]

Hi, 

 

I feel always very bad as I was in a nightmare. Always waves but in the adverse way... 

No improvement I'm loosing courage and hope. I'm often loosing wish to live. 

 

Current shema :

 

sleep  during +/- 6 h : good. 

6 am : wake with legs burnings, nausea, no more pics of cortisol. Back, nek  nape burnings and contracted. 

it has a little reduced, it increase again. 

7 am : internal Akhatisie : 6-8 with crisis, depression 6-9, make a lot of self care in bed like hypnosis, relaxation, yoga, etc... 

8 am get up

8. 30 am escitalopram 1,60 mg (1, 50 mg to 1,60 mg since 8 January) 

9 am  prazepam 4,75 mg

aches reduce a little. 

10. 30 am often make self care again because of aches and Akhatisie. 

Noon : eat, but recently anorexia again. 

1 pm : watch TV or video on internet. Force me to do some housework. 

I don't manage to walk anymore : don't find courage, but it is cold and often raining. But I walk in the house or in the garden : really force me. 

3 pm : prazepam 4,75 mg. 

Fog in brain, confusion. 

7 pm : diner

8 pm : watch TV, make games in internet. Feel me unable to read a book. 

9 pm : prazepam 4,75 mg. 

10 pm : feel me a little better but very tired. 

Go to bed at 10.30 pm : l-tryptophan 50 mg ( gradually tapered) self care and sleep. 

 

--->a lot of problems of memory and concentration. 

return of hard depression and suicidal ideas. 

lethargy

return of internal Akhatisie. I want all broken in the house but I don't do it. 

Want to cry very often. 

return of hard contractions in back, nek, migraines, lips tinglings. 

burnings in arms very hard. 

burnings in legs only on morning. 

feel me a little better on evening. Every mornings are horrible. Not a life. 

less stomach burnings but always digestive problems. 

 

--> I smoked in reality more of 20 cigarettes : I didn't had realized....and now 15 max. I reduce gradually. 

 

good luck to all and have a good day. 

 

Vega. 

 

 

[mustafa]

2 hours ago, Vegalia said:

Hi, 

 

I feel always very bad as I was in a nightmare. Always waves but in the adverse way... 

No improvement I'm loosing courage and hope. I'm often loosing wish to live. 

 

Current shema :

 

sleep  during +/- 6 h : good. 

6 am : wake with legs burnings, nausea, no more pics of cortisol. Back, nek  nape burnings and contracted. 

it has a little reduced, it increase again. 

7 am : internal Akhatisie : 6-8 with crisis, depression 6-9, make a lot of self care in bed like hypnosis, relaxation, yoga, etc... 

8 am get up

8. 30 am escitalopram 1,60 mg (1, 50 mg to 1,60 mg since 8 January) 

9 am  prazepam 4,75 mg

aches reduce a little. 

10. 30 am often make self care again because of aches and Akhatisie. 

Noon : eat, but recently anorexia again. 

1 pm : watch TV or video on internet. Force me to do some housework. 

I don't manage to walk anymore : don't find courage, but it is cold and often raining. But I walk in the house or in the garden : really force me. 

3 pm : prazepam 4,75 mg. 

Fog in brain, confusion. 

7 pm : diner

8 pm : watch TV, make games in internet. Feel me unable to read a book. 

9 pm : prazepam 4,75 mg. 

10 pm : feel me a little better but very tired. 

Go to bed at 10.30 pm : l-tryptophan 50 mg ( gradually tapered) self care and sleep. 

 

--->a lot of problems of memory and concentration. 

return of hard depression and suicidal ideas. 

lethargy

return of internal Akhatisie. I want all broken in the house but I don't do it. 

Want to cry very often. 

return of hard contractions in back, nek, migraines, lips tinglings. 

burnings in arms very hard. 

burnings in legs only on morning. 

feel me a little better on evening. Every mornings are horrible. Not a life. 

less stomach burnings but always digestive problems. 

 

--> I smoked in reality more of 20 cigarettes : I didn't had realized....and now 15 max. I reduce gradually. 

 

good luck to all and have a good day. 

 

Vega. 

 

 

Hi Vega, 

Please hang on, it seems you are in a wave, just hang on until you have another window.

Every wave is bringing u closer to recovery .

[Vegalia]

3 hours ago, mustafa said:

Hi Vega, 

Please hang on, it seems you are in a wave, just hang on until you have another window.

Every wave is bringing u closer to recovery .

dear Mustafa,

 

Thank tout for your words.

 

It IS very difficult. This wave IS so hard... So much hard symptôms. I will become crazy...

Since october, no real improvement in the base line.

 I never have real windows.  3 during 1 or 2 hours.

 

Take Care of yourself.

 

Vega.

 

[rola]

courage vega et sois patiente meme si c est dur . je pense à toi 😘

[Vegalia]

Merci Rola 😭

[mustafa]

Hello vegalia,

How you feel now!!❤️.

[Vegalia]

13 hours ago, mustafa said:

Hello vegalia,

How you feel now!!❤️.

Hi Mustafa

 

I feel me always very, very bad...

aches and burnings are very hard. Terrible yesterday.

Today I am very nervous, agitated with internal akhatisie again...

I am so tired and often hopeless. Have terrible mood and thinks...

Always in hell...but it seems hell is not forever.

 

I hope improvement since September and I don't have, on the contrary 

Little symptoms have disappeared but only bearable symptoms... which I could live 

The worsted are always here, never desappaered always too hard and increase with waves. Each wave seems worse the that the last.

 

I am sorry to be so negative... That's why in don't write here anymore. Nobody has solutions with my drugs.

My psychiatrist prescribed me Laroxyl for aches... I don't take it of course.

 

I don't know if I should increase or reduce seroplex, so I am always at 1,60 mg...I don't know if it is a good choice.

I feel me like a cold turkey... but I m not.

 

Monday a friend drived me to osteopath, but I am not sure it was a good idea...

I try a lot of things for going better and don't have success. It is difficult to accept.

 

I'm fighting to have help with no other drugs for my aches in a center for aches with multiple therapies. I live in country, can't drive and therapist are far... I try to find solutions but administration is very complicated in France. However I know we are lucky for a lot of things with our health system, but not for all. 

 

I feel me alone, very alone with my suffer. My friends and my family are far. My companion don't help me for nothing and make my situation worse with his attitude. Don't drive me to doctor or care, don't make shopping, or go to pharmacy for me : nothing. Of course no support. He is very angry if I cry. He is toxic for me, it is not new but it is worse.

I try to find social help for housework. I don't manage to do it anymore...the aches are too hard.

 

 

Thank you for your words. Thanks a lot.

I hope you are better.

 

kisses

 

Vega.

 

[rola]

salut 

courage vega je pense bien fort à toi 😘

[mustafa]

11 hours ago, Vegalia said:

 

Always in hell...but it seems hell is not forever

I don't know whether you are meaning to say that u believe in improvement and I hope you are .

Unfortunately, because we stay long in WDs, this becomes disturbing for people around us but I always assure myself that this condition isn't very disabling for us and other people could live through the same conditions; I was back to my parents today and got upset when mom told me iam wasting my age without work, this was very, very upsetting but I rembered again that this will be a memory and I will be effective again.

I know how upset and hurt and isolated you feel but when we remember that not only us are feeling this way, then the feeling of isolation is hiding and we become ok with our suffer of isolation.

It is our challenge, I always say, when iam ok, I would be a leader because I would accept more adventures, I won't be afraid or avoid anything like before that I actually faced very hard things and was able to endure.

You just update your accepting for your challenge again ; hard times may be coming for me and for u but every time we can motivate ourselves, don't waste it.

Good night my dear ❤️.

[Vegalia]

@rola And @mustafa. 😘

[Vegalia]

Hi

 

I didn't write since long time.

My situation is worse and worse.

Always waves and each waves is stronger... Stronger with aches and emotional spiral : in particular internal akhatisy it is horrible. Suicide ideas  I wanted to go in clinic which I had phoned it was ok. But with coronavirus it isn't possible anymore. Natural cares for my aches are no more possible with coronavirus... All  cancelled : logical.

( J'ai vu un médecin acupuncteur la semaine dernière, nous devions nous revoir, mes séances de kiné sont annulées au moins jusque mi avril voire plus ..

J'avais RV aussi en centre anti-douleur aujourd'hui pour prise en charge non médicamenteuse.

Tout, tout annulé par les médecins et praticiens qui suivent les consignes ce qui est normal)

 

I will write maybe longer tomorrow. And complete my signature : 1,60 mg escitalopram since January and 4,50 prazepam 3 times a day 

 

I feel worse and worse since September. 6 months and no improvement on the contrary...

 

Good evening all. Take care of yourself.

 

Vega 

 

[Vegalia]

Hello, 

 

Since my last post, I knew 4 weeks improvement, even if it was difficult. 

But since 10 days I feel me worse and worse. 

 

J'ai du mal à me concentrer pour écrire en anglais et même en français. ^^

 

Les douleurs sont revenues pires avec des noeuds musculaires de part et d'autre de la colonne : bas du dos, trapèzes, nuque, cou et céphalées de tension atroces. 

Parallèlement à cela, les crises d'akhatisie internes qui s'etaient bien estompées sont revenues. 

J'ai aussi un très gros énervement, une rage comme j'avais eue au démarrage des Anti-depresseurs au bout de deux semaines. Elle avait diminuée quand j'etais passée d'effexor 75 à 37,5 mg. Elle avait augmenté quand je suis remontée à effexor 75 mg. Elle s'etait estompée lors du pont vers sertraline puis avait Re augmenté peu de temps après être à 50 mg de sertraline. 

J'ai ensuite diminue la sertraline jusqu'à 25 mg progressivement et cet énervement, cette rage ont bien réduit puis disparu. 

J'ai alors gardé 25 mg de sertraline 3 mois et réduit lysanxia comme vous pouvez le voir dans ma signature. 

Mais en juillet cet énervement est revenu. 

J'ai fait cette erreur de changer sertraline pour escitalopram, cet énervement constant à empiré encore. 

J'ai suivi les mauvais conseils de diminuer trop vite. Mais malgré des symptômes terribles cet énervement était parti et plus revenu. 

Sont apparues des crises d'akhatisie interne en octobre, probablement dues au cone bien trop rapide. 

Cependant ce sentiment d'enervement fort et constant avait disparu et il revient très fort... 

Je dois me contenir. J'ai envie de tout casser.Je ne peux toujours pas pleurer ou si peu. 

 

J'ai augmenté escitalopram à 1,60 mg la première semaine de janvier. Je prends toujours cette dose de façon constante tous les matins à 8h30.

 

J'ai fait de micro réductions de prazepam. Actuellement 4,385 mg x 3, soit une réduction de 1,095 mg en 7 mois. 

 

Je ne prends plus aucun complément alimentaire. Je pense avoir totalement stoppé l- tryptophane fin janvier. J'y suis allée tout doucement. 

 

Je ne sais pas si c'est encore une vague mais pire. J'ai l'impression que chaque vague est pire que la précédente et je désespère. J'ai de très mauvaises pensées que je n'avais plus. 

Je ne sais pas non plus si c'est en effet direct d'escitalopram. 

Bref, je suis en enfer... Cette dégradation est survenue très brutalement et Empire. 

 

@Erell

Si tu as un moment et si tu as la santé pour aider, saurais- tu traduire?  S'il te plaît? 

Mais pense à toi d'abord surtout. 

 

Je vais vraiment essayer de mettre ma signature à jour et décrire mon schéma de symptômes. 

Je suis tellement mal que cela m'est très difficile et également avec les problèmes aux yeux pour écrire. 

 

Bisous

 

Vega

 

 

[Vegalia]

I just read @LostRunner history. 

 

My réaction with venlafaxine first anti depressant was thé same, same symptoms after 3 days. 

I'm absolutely sûre I have adverse réaction with anti depressants. But WD too... 

 

Vega

[Erell]

3 hours ago, Vegalia said:

Hello, 

 

Since my last post, I knew 4 weeks improvement, even if it was difficult. 

But since 10 days I feel me worse and worse. 

 

J'ai du mal à me concentrer pour écrire en anglais et même en français. ^^

 

Les douleurs sont revenues pires avec des noeuds musculaires de part et d'autre de la colonne : bas du dos, trapèzes, nuque, cou et céphalées de tension atroces. 

Parallèlement à cela, les crises d'akhatisie internes qui s'etaient bien estompées sont revenues. 

J'ai aussi un très gros énervement, une rage comme j'avais eue au démarrage des Anti-depresseurs au bout de deux semaines. Elle avait diminuée quand j'etais passée d'effexor 75 à 37,5 mg. Elle avait augmenté quand je suis remontée à effexor 75 mg. Elle s'etait estompée lors du pont vers sertraline puis avait Re augmenté peu de temps après être à 50 mg de sertraline. 

J'ai ensuite diminue la sertraline jusqu'à 25 mg progressivement et cet énervement, cette rage ont bien réduit puis disparu. 

J'ai alors gardé 25 mg de sertraline 3 mois et réduit lysanxia comme vous pouvez le voir dans ma signature. 

Mais en juillet cet énervement est revenu. 

J'ai fait cette erreur de changer sertraline pour escitalopram, cet énervement constant à empiré encore. 

J'ai suivi les mauvais conseils de diminuer trop vite. Mais malgré des symptômes terribles cet énervement était parti et plus revenu. 

Sont apparues des crises d'akhatisie interne en octobre, probablement dues au cone bien trop rapide. 

Cependant ce sentiment d'enervement fort et constant avait disparu et il revient très fort... 

Je dois me contenir. J'ai envie de tout casser.Je ne peux toujours pas pleurer ou si peu. 

 

J'ai augmenté escitalopram à 1,60 mg la première semaine de janvier. Je prends toujours cette dose de façon constante tous les matins à 8h30.

 

J'ai fait de micro réductions de prazepam. Actuellement 4,385 mg x 3, soit une réduction de 1,095 mg en 7 mois. 

 

Je ne prends plus aucun complément alimentaire. Je pense avoir totalement stoppé l- tryptophane fin janvier. J'y suis allée tout doucement. 

 

Je ne sais pas si c'est encore une vague mais pire. J'ai l'impression que chaque vague est pire que la précédente et je désespère. J'ai de très mauvaises pensées que je n'avais plus. 

Je ne sais pas non plus si c'est en effet direct d'escitalopram. 

Bref, je suis en enfer... Cette dégradation est survenue très brutalement et Empire. 

 

@Erell

Si tu as un moment et si tu as la santé pour aider, saurais- tu traduire?  S'il te plaît? 

Mais pense à toi d'abord surtout. 

 

Je vais vraiment essayer de mettre ma signature à jour et décrire mon schéma de symptômes. 

Je suis tellement mal que cela m'est très difficile et également avec les problèmes aux yeux pour écrire. 

 

Bisous

 

Vega

 

 

 

 

 

Translation :

 

After my last post (March 19th), I've been through 4 weeks of improvments. But since 10 days I feel worse.

 

It is difficult for me to write, in English and in French, can't focus.

 

Physical pains are worse than ever, mostly spine pain : lower back, neck, trapezius muscles, and awful tension headaches.

 

In the mean time, internal akathasia crises are back, whereas they had faded.

 

I also feel rage, jitteriness : exactly like I felt when I started AD (with Effexor).

At that time, the rage fadded when I dropped Effexor from 75mg to 37,5mg. It increased when I went back to 75m Effexor. It fadded when I switched to Sertraline, then disappeared when I went from 50mg Sertraline to 25mg. 

 

But last July, this rage came back.

I switched from Sertraline to Escitalopram, and it was a big mistake. With this switch, rage increased again.

And then I followed bad advices and tappered Escitalopram too fast.  

 

I'm scared because the rage came back ten days ago, and it is very strong.

I have to temper myself. I want to break everything around me. I still can't cry.

 

I updosed Escitalopram to 1,60mg first week of January 2020. I'm still holding at that dose, I take it every morning at 8.30 am.

 

I've made little drops of Prazepam. Currently I take 4,385mg x3 (that equals to a 1.095mg cut in 7 months).

 

 

I don't take any supplement anymore. I think I've stopped taking l-tryptophane in the end of last Janurary. I tappered very slowly.

 

I don't know if I'm in a wave, or if something worse is going on. Every wave feels worse than previous ones, and I feel desperate. I have very bad thougts.  

I don't know either if it's an advere effect from Escitalopram.

 

In short, I'm in hell...this deterioration is very brutal and is getting worse.

 

 

I'm gonna try to update my signature, and to describe my symptoms pattern.

But I feel so awful right now, it is very difficult to type.

 

Vega

 

 

 

 

[Vegalia]

Thanks you so much dear Erell.

 

I reflected a lot with benzo tolerance today, and read about it

Tolérance exist. I have been addict very fast with benzo.

But how can a réduction help for it? 

Even if my taper of prazepam since September is very small. I think now as Shep told me that taper very slowly prazepam was maybe not à good idea. 

Benzo can help for antidepressant  WD and adverse réaction liké rage I think. 

 

I did an error. I feeled worse since 2 weeks not 10 days .

When I had improvement I Hopedale to taper escitalopram again maybe un june if my situation were stable or betterave, liké " Normal" WD, but now I think différent and I'm confuse. 

 

Return of almost permanent rage and feeling me maniac again worries me. Effect of antidepressant + micro taper of benzo.? 

If I hold prazepam and escitalopram stable is it good, Or should I try to reduce a litlle escitalopram ? 

I think I have adverse effects and WD together : the worsted situation. 

 

Thank you for advices if somebody can tell me. 

 

Take care of yourself. 

 

Vega.