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☼ Ben190: cold turkey - need advice and help


Ben190

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  • Administrator

Lots of stuff has happened in the years since I went off Paxil in 2004, Ben.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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But positive? Or are you still kinda experiencing withdrawal issues? I am getting better every day, I think I could live with the symptoms I have if I would get my libido back and sexual function. Although it would be hard everyday it would be more important for me and for my girlfriend. Hope you are doing good! 

2018 - october: 10 days Fluoxetin 20mg

2018 - october: CT after bad reactions

2019 - june: 3,5 weeks Fluoxetin 20mg

2019 - june: 5 days Fluoxetin 10mg

2019 - july: CT after massive problems

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  • Administrator

No, I do not currently have withdrawal issues. I lost 11 years to withdrawal syndrome.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Did you have problems with libido/ sexual function? Wow that is quite long, how long did you take AD? Did you have all the time big struggle? I hope you can enjoy your life now a bit more! 

2018 - october: 10 days Fluoxetin 20mg

2018 - october: CT after bad reactions

2019 - june: 3,5 weeks Fluoxetin 20mg

2019 - june: 5 days Fluoxetin 10mg

2019 - july: CT after massive problems

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@Altostrata: I just wanna say thank you for all the work you have done, for this forum, for your answers and tell you that you are such a strong person. I saw your video on YouTube, you are amazing!

 

best, ben

2018 - october: 10 days Fluoxetin 20mg

2018 - october: CT after bad reactions

2019 - june: 3,5 weeks Fluoxetin 20mg

2019 - june: 5 days Fluoxetin 10mg

2019 - july: CT after massive problems

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  • 7 months later...

I am still in a very bad condition, I am 16 months off Fluoxetin and still pain everywhere, head, shoulders, ears, extreme problemes with noises and heavy lights. I have no memory, cant concentrate, no erection, no libido, tiredness, fatigue, weak muscles, I am wondering if I will suffer for ever. 
 

no appetite, too tired to Cook myself food.
 

I dont know what to do, any advice? Any help? I cant believe what I am going through 😭😔😪

 

best, ben

2018 - october: 10 days Fluoxetin 20mg

2018 - october: CT after bad reactions

2019 - june: 3,5 weeks Fluoxetin 20mg

2019 - june: 5 days Fluoxetin 10mg

2019 - july: CT after massive problems

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  • Mentor

Ben, do you see pattern of windows and waves? When we are in a wave, it seems to us that we haven't escape. Unfortunatly also at 16 months off (as I read in some topics) we can continue to struggle but if you had seen some very slight improvements, cling to hope that months by months these issues will fade away!

Do you try some supplements (omega 3 or magnesium)?

Try to force you to cook something (our brain is very good at pushing us down, so we had to fight this) and try to eat as clean as possible!

Keep care of you!

July 2015: the 20mg citalopram for great stress begins

After two years I start tapering (slow but without medical advice) and I guess wrongly. First up to 10 mg, then 5 mg and 2 mg (liquid solution) and skips

January 2020 (I don't remember exactly the day): off citalopram (last dose 2mg).

June 2020: adrenal crash. The beginning of Hell on Earth

 

Current supplement:

- saffron pill (20 mg) + vit. E, omega 3 (EPA + DHA) 2g, magnesium bisglycinate 300 mg, iron , vitamin D3 (2500ui) +K7 (50 ui), vitamin C (1g) + quercitin (25 mg), theanine (as necessary).

 

Try meditating / mindfulness, walking every day, CBT/ACT, massage.

 

"E quindi uscimmo a riveder le stelle" ("And so we went out to see the stars again")

(Dante Alighieri, Divine Comedy , Inferno, XXXIV, 139)

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  • 2 weeks later...

Hey Leila,

 

thanks for your email. I am in a Bad Condition still. Seems like I have stopped healing. Muscles are weak, Pssd still there, extreme fatigue, tiredness Even After more than 8 hours of sleep, my feet, legs, hands are cold 24/7. I am pushing my Body through the day, day by day, I have no Power left. I am sad, and no I am not taking supplements. Omega3 didnt work good, I Tried Magnesium but my body is sensitiv, even to Magnesium biglycinat.

 

I hope I awake one day and feel good without symptoms again.

 

best,

ben

2018 - october: 10 days Fluoxetin 20mg

2018 - october: CT after bad reactions

2019 - june: 3,5 weeks Fluoxetin 20mg

2019 - june: 5 days Fluoxetin 10mg

2019 - july: CT after massive problems

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  • Mentor

@Ben190, on April you said that (except for PSSD) other issues were less intense... You had to check if something change in your life (diet, taking medicines, stress or flue/covid)... If not, I suppose (but take this like non-expert reasoning) you could be in a bad wave (sometimes it happens at 15 months off and can last weeks) because you are 16 months off it could be your case. I read about Pina's story (also her, she is German and maybe you can talk with her) and I learnt that could be bad months before we can see the light... Don't miss hope! Come back to say to us if you feel better! It's important for this community!

July 2015: the 20mg citalopram for great stress begins

After two years I start tapering (slow but without medical advice) and I guess wrongly. First up to 10 mg, then 5 mg and 2 mg (liquid solution) and skips

January 2020 (I don't remember exactly the day): off citalopram (last dose 2mg).

June 2020: adrenal crash. The beginning of Hell on Earth

 

Current supplement:

- saffron pill (20 mg) + vit. E, omega 3 (EPA + DHA) 2g, magnesium bisglycinate 300 mg, iron , vitamin D3 (2500ui) +K7 (50 ui), vitamin C (1g) + quercitin (25 mg), theanine (as necessary).

 

Try meditating / mindfulness, walking every day, CBT/ACT, massage.

 

"E quindi uscimmo a riveder le stelle" ("And so we went out to see the stars again")

(Dante Alighieri, Divine Comedy , Inferno, XXXIV, 139)

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Hey Leila,

 

yes I know I got hit by an immense wave, it happened 10 days ago. I was with my grandma when the bomb exploded, wasn’t able to talk a lot, slept or just lay for 14hours a day. When we went with the car to friends for 30mins I slept away in the car. I think I have just some bad emotions right now and intense power loss. I was sad when they were sad about how I was doing. I feel like I am depersonalized, like standing beside myself and watching how it all goes in the wrong direction. 
 

But I am strong, and will always fight. Maybe it will be a long battle But I won’t stop trying. Thanks yes maybe I can talk to her :) I can’t remember things, my memories are kinda broken. But today I thought about the movie, maybe you know Groundhog Day? I thought like how many times do I have to awake until this sh** will be left apart.

 

hope you are doing good,

 

Ben

2018 - october: 10 days Fluoxetin 20mg

2018 - october: CT after bad reactions

2019 - june: 3,5 weeks Fluoxetin 20mg

2019 - june: 5 days Fluoxetin 10mg

2019 - july: CT after massive problems

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  • 4 weeks later...
  • Mentor
On 12/10/2020 at 9:34 PM, Ben190 said:

Groundhog Day

This is a good cinematic quote! It describes perfectly the cyclical return of the nightmare WD! You will fight this, I'm sure! Keep on!

How do you feel now? I hope better!

I take this opportunity to wish you a good year of healing!

Keep on touch!

Leila

July 2015: the 20mg citalopram for great stress begins

After two years I start tapering (slow but without medical advice) and I guess wrongly. First up to 10 mg, then 5 mg and 2 mg (liquid solution) and skips

January 2020 (I don't remember exactly the day): off citalopram (last dose 2mg).

June 2020: adrenal crash. The beginning of Hell on Earth

 

Current supplement:

- saffron pill (20 mg) + vit. E, omega 3 (EPA + DHA) 2g, magnesium bisglycinate 300 mg, iron , vitamin D3 (2500ui) +K7 (50 ui), vitamin C (1g) + quercitin (25 mg), theanine (as necessary).

 

Try meditating / mindfulness, walking every day, CBT/ACT, massage.

 

"E quindi uscimmo a riveder le stelle" ("And so we went out to see the stars again")

(Dante Alighieri, Divine Comedy , Inferno, XXXIV, 139)

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Hey Leila,

 

I am fighting ever day, sometimes a bit better, sometimes worse. Still tired, fatigue, strange pain on ear and head, body is very cold (feet, legs, genitals), no Libido, erectyle dysfunction, orgasm is back and good. I am at night never tired but in the morning extreme.

 

hope I will Recover this year. How are you doing? @Leila

 

best wishes for you too, Ben

2018 - october: 10 days Fluoxetin 20mg

2018 - october: CT after bad reactions

2019 - june: 3,5 weeks Fluoxetin 20mg

2019 - june: 5 days Fluoxetin 10mg

2019 - july: CT after massive problems

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • Mentor

Dear Ben, sorry for my late answer! Yes, it's a struggle battle also for me every day but I can see some little improvements from the darkest days of acute WD (six-seven months ago)... I would say that I'm now able to ride the waves but this kind of acceptance is the most difficult part of the process... I know fatigue is horrible because I have experienced it and me too I struggled with neck and head pain: strange, intermittent and I'm scary sometimes severe problem happens in my head. We had to fight and carry on: not simple but I hope day by day, month by month it will be more manegeable!

Keep care of you! I think of you,

Leila

July 2015: the 20mg citalopram for great stress begins

After two years I start tapering (slow but without medical advice) and I guess wrongly. First up to 10 mg, then 5 mg and 2 mg (liquid solution) and skips

January 2020 (I don't remember exactly the day): off citalopram (last dose 2mg).

June 2020: adrenal crash. The beginning of Hell on Earth

 

Current supplement:

- saffron pill (20 mg) + vit. E, omega 3 (EPA + DHA) 2g, magnesium bisglycinate 300 mg, iron , vitamin D3 (2500ui) +K7 (50 ui), vitamin C (1g) + quercitin (25 mg), theanine (as necessary).

 

Try meditating / mindfulness, walking every day, CBT/ACT, massage.

 

"E quindi uscimmo a riveder le stelle" ("And so we went out to see the stars again")

(Dante Alighieri, Divine Comedy , Inferno, XXXIV, 139)

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  • 4 months later...

Hey guys,

 

I don’t know what exactly caused this, but I had some daylong improvement where also only a little step was missing to feel good (also minimal libido/ good feeling down there). And that there came the day where hell broke out again. Unbelievable pain, tiredness, no libido, ED, little brain fog, no appetite at all, like I could eat 900kcal per day no problem. I also realized that I am so tired that I was unable to drive the car... I am so frustrated, thought things were getting better... 

 

I am wondering if I should go back to gym now with the extreme wave. Muscles like pudding. Sad 😪😭

2018 - october: 10 days Fluoxetin 20mg

2018 - october: CT after bad reactions

2019 - june: 3,5 weeks Fluoxetin 20mg

2019 - june: 5 days Fluoxetin 10mg

2019 - july: CT after massive problems

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In addition my muscles are so weak, I sometimes believe I am not able of walking... I am sooooo ******* sad. Like a depression

2018 - october: 10 days Fluoxetin 20mg

2018 - october: CT after bad reactions

2019 - june: 3,5 weeks Fluoxetin 20mg

2019 - june: 5 days Fluoxetin 10mg

2019 - july: CT after massive problems

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  • 1 year later...

@Altostrata

Hey Alto or also others,

do you think it is possible that berries like currants and blue berries trigger symptoms because of high vitamin c and antioxidants? It’s crazy but I feel like they do...

 

Have a nice weekend,

Ben

2018 - october: 10 days Fluoxetin 20mg

2018 - october: CT after bad reactions

2019 - june: 3,5 weeks Fluoxetin 20mg

2019 - june: 5 days Fluoxetin 10mg

2019 - july: CT after massive problems

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  • ChessieCat changed the title to Ben190: cold turkey - need advice and help
  • Moderator Emeritus

Some members find that they react to certain foods.  You might try not eating those foods for a while and then reintroducing them to see if the same thing happens.

 

hypersensitivity-to-drugs-foods-and-supplements

 

eating-food-as-an-activating-factor-increasing-anxiety-or-symptoms

 

It might not have been the berries but another food that you ate at the same time or not long before:

 

histamine-food-intolerance

 

* NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA *

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED:  (6 year taper)      0mg Pristiq  on 13th November 2021

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021   LAST DOSE 0.0025mg

Post 0 updates start here    My tapering program     My Intro (goes to tapering graph)

 VIDEO:   Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management

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  • Administrator

If you get a bad reaction to something, reduce it or stop it.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

Link to comment
  • 7 months later...
  • Administrator

Hello, @Ben190 How are you doing?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

Link to comment
On 6/14/2021 at 8:18 PM, Ben190 said:

In addition my muscles are so weak, I sometimes believe I am not able of walking... I am sooooo ******* sad. Like a depression

So do I, since my withdrawal I got bodily weakness, especially in my arms. 
I ´m from Germany, too. Wish you the very best! 

18 years of Escitalopram/ Lexapro 

  • since 2004 until December 2021 Escitalopram/ Lexapro
  • Jan 2004 until June 2004 10 mg Escitalopram 
  • July 2004 until March 2011 20 mg Escitalopram 
  • 2011 until 2016  10 mg Escitalopram
  • 2016 until Dec 2021  20 mg Escitalopram
  • Dec 2021 until end of Jan 2022  5-week taper of Escitalopram, 5mg less per week to 0 end of Jan 2022/ last doses 2,5 mg /1,25 mg

Trying to reinstate with Vortioxetin/Brintellix used instead of Escitalopram/ Lexapro! in June 2022 Vortioxetin 10mg only for about 2 days; the 5 mg for 2 weeks, then Stop because of the effects of worse symptoms ( dose to high !? ) 

Starting to reinstate Lexapro on March 25th, 2023 with 0,25 mg following 26th March 0,5 mg; since 2nd of April 1 mg liquid drop; in between again dose cut to 0,5 for 2 days; increased again on April 4 th to 1 mg until 23th April;  reduced dose 0,5 mg again on 24th April 23 - 30.04.23; reduced dose effective May 1st, 23 to 0,25 mg. 

currently supplements are Diasporal Magnesiumcitrat 300 mg and Doppelherz Omega 3 Fatty Acids 1400 mg EPA 285 mg/ DHA 190 mg , Multivitamine Fruit Juice La Vita 

 

 

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On 3/16/2023 at 11:39 PM, Altostrata said:

Hello, @Ben190 How are you doing?

Hey Altostrata,

 

thanks I am doing good :). At the moment I am fighting with covid for the First Time which kinda hit my system hardly.

 

But besides my healing path continued and is still continuing. I am now able to do Sports again on a regular basis like 3 times per week. 
 

I am also enjoying life again and see that there is a light at the end of this process. Even the aspect of PSSD is healing slowly, things feel good again, main aspect is still the low libido but I think This will heal to. Just needs a bit more time :)

 

Until now it was a very bumpy ride but the bumps become less and the better moments become more :)

 

hope you are doing good too!

 

Best,

Ben

2018 - october: 10 days Fluoxetin 20mg

2018 - october: CT after bad reactions

2019 - june: 3,5 weeks Fluoxetin 20mg

2019 - june: 5 days Fluoxetin 10mg

2019 - july: CT after massive problems

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On 3/17/2023 at 12:10 AM, Caesar65 said:

So do I, since my withdrawal I got bodily weakness, especially in my arms. 
I ´m from Germany, too. Wish you the very best! 

Oh 😕 i can feel your pain… hope you will recover fast and feel better too! Never give up 💪💪💪😊

2018 - october: 10 days Fluoxetin 20mg

2018 - october: CT after bad reactions

2019 - june: 3,5 weeks Fluoxetin 20mg

2019 - june: 5 days Fluoxetin 10mg

2019 - july: CT after massive problems

Link to comment
  • Administrator

Because you're feeling better, I added our cheerful "here comes the sun" symbol to the title of your Intro topic, to show you're recovering.

 

Please continue to let us know how you're doing. I hope you will add your story to our Recovery Success Stories eventually!

 

Please see this topic:  How to write your success story

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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  • 7 months later...

@Ben190 at 2 years out, was your penis still completely dead, thin, shrunken and dysfunctional, like the muscles down there can't contract and the penis has zero blood flow? Did you have spasms and massive pain in your genital and pelvic floor area? Did your head hurt like after a terrible car crash?? I have had all of this **** for the past two years, it is just crazy. Still trying to heal but no improvements, I don't know how long this is going to take... There is not a minute or a second in the day my penis looks close to normal. It feels like the entire nervous system can't send the right electro-chemical signals in the body... How can these extremely dangerous pills be prescribed to healthy people?? I know people who occasionally do street drugs and are fine and my body is ruined from a legal SSRI medication prescribed from a doctor.....

 

@Avicii @Parisien how are you? Have you had any improvements the past months..

 

Venlafaxine 75mg, 150mg, 225mg December 2020 - March 2021

Sertraline 50mg, 100mg March 2021 - April 2021

Escitalopram 10mg, 20 mg April 2021 - May 2021

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I am just so angry at the whole system that this is happening to us and doctors don't get any punishment for causing this extreme injury... Sorry for the double post, but I am so tired of dealing with this trauma. Please guys keep in touch if you have improved or not.

Venlafaxine 75mg, 150mg, 225mg December 2020 - March 2021

Sertraline 50mg, 100mg March 2021 - April 2021

Escitalopram 10mg, 20 mg April 2021 - May 2021

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