Ella56: Drug withdrawal

[Altostrata]

55 minutes ago, Ella56 said:

My eyes are a but blurry and head is feeling a bit confused and feeling a bit off as disconnected. Shaky,brain fog I havent had that symptom for awhile so i am thinking it is the updose. Is 2 days going to make a huge difference to change my mind? 

 

You may have passing symptoms, or this could be from your worrying. We need to see if this happens day after day. Looking for those daily notes, they're very important.

[Ella56]

@Colonial by cost i mean to go back to 1mg today and stay on that for a few months to stabilize. 

[Ella56]

@Coloniall @Altostrata I thought maybe going up 1.5 might help me with wd symptoms..and stabilize. Maybe just taking 1mg for a few month will do the same. Not feeling i can even think today. How long does one usually stay on a doze  to stabilize before they moved to another

[Altostrata]

Do not jump around in your drug dosing. Could be more Prozac is better. Be sure to take the same amount at the same time each day.

 

We need to see the effects of the dosage increase before thinking about next steps. This could take a week or so. Please stop worrying and post daily notes.

[Colonial]

The entire reason You "updosed" to 1.5 was because You were already not doing well from the stress of the housing situation.

Your CNS is already destabilized, it is going to take time to calm down.

You said You wanted to try to go up because the symptoms were already "worse".

So, now You need to give it time to see if it will help.

 

But the medication is NOT the biggest issue here, Your main problem is how Your over worrying about the symptoms and the added stress about the housing.

You can't be changing your meds every few days.

Whatever "cost" it is in added time to eventually wean off them is irrelevant right now.

You stay on a dose as long as You need, there is no set time for when stabilization will happen.

 

You need to stop worring about the medication variables, which is NOT answerable right now, and work on what you CAN, The housing and the coping techniques.

Otherwise Your anxiety will cause symptoms that aren't even medication OR WD Related but You will think they are.

 

[Ella56]

6 hours ago, Altostrata said:

Do not jump around in your drug dosing. Could be more Prozac is better. Be sure to take the same amount at the same time each day.

 

We need to see the effects of the dosage increase before thinking about next steps. This could take a week or so. Please stop worrying and post daily notes.

What do u mean by prozac? 

[Ella56]

March 19 notes

12 am ti 645 am slept

 

8am ringing in my head

9am feeling rage  home alone so screamed a lot, stomach feel a bit nauseous 

 

10 am feel a bit disconnected

 

1pm panicked ...only took 1mg celexa. I am sorry just going to stay at this amount and deal with my symptoms 

 

630 crying a bit want to make the right decision

Omega 2200, vit e, mag 50mg

 

8pm bit anxiety, stomach sick

 830 epsom bath

9pm going to go to bed music relax

[Ella56]

@Colonial  @Altostrata I panicked today after the symptom i had. Afraid to go backwards even though u said it may not be the updoze.  I am going to stay on 1mg and work coping with my symptoms. Sorry. 

[Colonial]

Ok, hopefully the little extra for 2 days will not have much effect.

Hopefully in a few months you will see some significant improvements!

Rest well!

 

[Altostrata]

Please continue to post 24 hours of symptom notes each day. We want to know about drug-related symptoms.

[Ella56]

On 3/16/2020 at 7:16 PM, manymoretodays said:

 

It means, better to just do a low dose, teeny updose, such as what has been suggested.  I'll see if I can find a link to something here, on site, that talks more about receptors and upregulating, if you'd like, Ella56?  Better yet, go get a copy of Robert Whitaker's book, Anatomy of an Epidemic , or Your Drug Might be Your Problem, by Dr. Peter Bregging.  

 

Like I said in PM, no one "gets" or understands all this completely right off the bat, right after arrival here.  And especially if you just got here by googling or something.  You haven't even been here a whole month yet.  You are doing great.  Begin to relax.......I think you are on the right track now.  I do.

 

L, P, H, and G,

mmt

 

I just saw your post above, on your decision.    That's good.  Keep the notes coming, the drug and symptom notes.......you know the drill now.

I am trying to figure out what to do for the wd symptoms and want to know the big picture ..what i should do step by step til i am out of this and get more stabilized.

Should of waited to updoze til after move and read more about it. I cant seem to it figure out and scared. My symptoms are not good and dont know what to do to improve them. Even though i just read again what u suggest and colonial suggested. To take the 1.5mg that it might help right? Afraid if it doesnt, how am i going to come off it in 10 days and can it make me worse. And that would shake my system up more.  feel i am walking on thin ice and have to be careful each move step. I know not to take ativan again but i dont know how to get to stable. Am i making a big deal out of .5mg?

[Ella56]

1 hour ago, Ella56 said:

I am trying to figure out what to do for the wd symptoms and want to know the big picture ..what i should do step by step til i am out of this and get more stabilized.

Should of waited to updoze til after move and read more about it. I cant seem to it figure out and scared. My symptoms are not good and dont know what to do to improve them. Even though i just read again what u suggest and colonial suggested. To take the 1.5mg that it might help right? Afraid if it doesnt, how am i going to come off it in 10 days and can it make me worse. And that would shake my system up more.  feel i am walking on thin ice and have to be careful each move step. I know not to take ativan again but i dont know how to get to stable. Am i making a big deal out of .5mg?

The rage feelings are strong, feel i will break my teeth and self harm thoughts are not good..this is why i am this bad..trying the coping skills. 

[Colonial]

My personal opinion,  Yes, you  probably made too big of a deal over the .5 mg increase.

But You made the decision quickly without thinking about it as well, which is what I think is an issue for You.

As soon as one symptom came along You panicked and went back down.

 

You can't keep double guessing yourself.

All You can do is make a decision and stick with it for a good period of time.

First you took the up dose for 2 days and then got scared and stopped and only took 1mg yesterday, now Your scared maybe you should have stayed with it.

This will not help Your WD Symptoms, worrying if each time You have a low moment its because of the drug change.

 

Your biggest stressors right now is the housing, that is what is making your symptoms worse.

You already have the links to the safe care pages on this site to help the symptoms, use those, read back over Your thread they are listed there.

 

But why are You worrying about coming OFF the drug in 10 days even if the updose doesn't help?

You will NOT be tapering until You have stabilized which, just a guess, is probably a few months from now after your settled in Your new housing.

You don't lower Your dose until Your stable, we've told You that.

 

The thoughts are just that, they have no power to make You do anything.

Don't give them power by being afraid of them, ignore them. They will come and go.

 

The big picture is You are going to need a few months to start feeling better, but how long depends on how well You respond to the stress around You.

It's been 3 days, did  you contact anyone about Your housing rights or somewhere else to live?

 

 

[Altostrata]

8 hours ago, Ella56 said:

I cant seem to it figure out and scared. My symptoms are not good and dont know what to do to improve them. Even though i just read again what u suggest and colonial suggested. To take the 1.5mg that it might help right? Afraid if it doesnt, how am i going to come off it in 10 days and can it make me worse. And that would shake my system up more.  feel i am walking on thin ice and have to be careful each move step. I know not to take ativan again but i dont know how to get to stable. Am i making a big deal out of .5mg?

 

You can't figure it out. You need to get more information to make a decision.

 

You did not give the 0.5mg increase enough of a change to make a decision whether it was helping or not, so we don't know if maybe 1mg is not enough for your withdrawal syndrome.

 

We suggest very small dosage changes so if an increase has a bad effect, that effect will be small and go away quickly. We know you need to be careful. We have all been in the same situation.

 

If you feel safer taking 1mg, that's fine. Your symptoms may come and go, but we need to see those daily notes. We may have suggestions about how to soften the symptoms.

 

Please stop scaring yourself. You also need to move your attention to relieving your situational difficulties.

[manymoretodays]

8 hours ago, Ella56 said:

I am trying to figure out what to do for the wd symptoms and want to know the big picture ..what i should do step by step til i am out of this and get more stabilized.

Should of waited to updoze til after move and read more about it. I cant seem to it figure out and scared. My symptoms are not good and dont know what to do to improve them. Even though i just read again what u suggest and colonial suggested. To take the 1.5mg that it might help right? Afraid if it doesnt, how am i going to come off it in 10 days and can it make me worse. And that would shake my system up more.  feel i am walking on thin ice and have to be careful each move step. I know not to take ativan again but i dont know how to get to stable. Am i making a big deal out of .5mg?

 

I don't know.  Did you go back down to 1 mg already?

13 hours ago, Ella56 said:

I panicked today after the symptom i had. Afraid to go backwards even though u said it may not be the updoze.  I am going to stay on 1mg and work coping with my symptoms. Sorry. 

 

And okay.  Now stay put, and let's get 4-7 days of notes from you too!

Here's a helpful breathing ?"meme" that might help you to do, when you just feel overwhelmed and need a quick "non-drug calmer".

 

I think I gave you the how to, on 4 seconds in through the nose, then hold for 7 seconds, then breathe out for 8 seconds.  Whatever works best, with practice.  Sometimes an image helps too, so the above is nice.

 

Here's another nice guided one too, 4, 4, and 4

 

Hope those might help Ella56,

 

Best, L, P, H, and G,

mmt

Edited March 20, 2020 by manymoretodays

[Ella56]

10 hours ago, Colonial said:

My personal opinion,  Yes, you  probably made too big of a deal over the .5 mg increase.

But You made the decision quickly without thinking about it as well, which is what I think is an issue for You.

As soon as one symptom came along You panicked and went back down.

 

You can't keep double guessing yourself.

All You can do is make a decision and stick with it for a good period of time.

First you took the up dose for 2 days and then got scared and stopped and only took 1mg yesterday, now Your scared maybe you should have stayed with it.

This will not help Your WD Symptoms, worrying if each time You have a low moment its because of the drug change.

 

Your biggest stressors right now is the housing, that is what is making your symptoms worse.

You already have the links to the safe care pages on this site to help the symptoms, use those, read back over Your thread they are listed there.

 

But why are You worrying about coming OFF the drug in 10 days even if the updose doesn't help?

You will NOT be tapering until You have stabilized which, just a guess, is probably a few months from now after your settled in Your new housing.

You don't lower Your dose until Your stable, we've told You that.

 

The thoughts are just that, they have no power to make You do anything.

Don't give them power by being afraid of them, ignore them. They will come and go.

 

The big picture is You are going to need a few months to start feeling better, but how long depends on how well You respond to the stress around You.

It's been 3 days, did  you contact anyone about Your housing rights or somewhere else to live?

 

 

I thought if i didnt feel good on 1.5mg i would have to go off it right away ? and it might be hard...maybe send me to hospital hard. 

 

Could i possibly just stabilize on 1mg, .

meaning i would stay on it for however long it takes to feel stabilized ?? Is that correct?   

why did u think 1.5mg may be better? ?

 

It is hard to go up on a drug that has harmed me so much...

I did everything i could to find a place today just none of them feel right. ..been going out everyday.

 

[Ella56]

7 hours ago, Altostrata said:

 

You can't figure it out. You need to get more information to make a decision.

 

You did not give the 0.5mg increase enough of a change to make a decision whether it was helping or not, so we don't know if maybe 1mg is not enough for your withdrawal syndrome.

 

We suggest very small dosage changes so if an increase has a bad effect, that effect will be small and go away quickly. We know you need to be careful. We have all been in the same situation.

 

If you feel safer taking 1mg, that's fine. Your symptoms may come and go, but we need to see those daily notes. We may have suggestions about how to soften the symptoms.

 

Please stop scaring yourself. You also need to move your attention to relieving your situational difficulties.

If i take the 1.5 and its having a bad effect. How would i get iff if it  ? Would i go the next day back to 1mg or would i have to stay on it. I know my home life is making it all worse. Need some stabilty to move. I am not in a good place to make clear decisions. I just wanted to know if i do this ..hypothetically...what will happen and if i doesnt help what do i do from there. Just unstable in every area.

[Colonial]

I thought if i didnt feel good on 1.5mg i would have to go off it right away ? and it might be hard...maybe send me to hospital hard. 

 

Your not focusing well on what was written.

You would only go off  if you had a bad reaction. 

You would NOT go off right away just because it didn't seem to help. 

You would wait until your symptoms stabilize before You would go down, how ever long that takes.

35 minutes ago, Ella56 said:

why did u think 1.5mg may be better? ?

 

I am not the one who thought it might be.

One member offered it as a "possibility", and You seemed to decide to do it right away.

But You haven't even given it enough time to work, Alto told You you have to wait atleast a week, so You haven't even waited long enough to know if it will help.

It might very well might have worked, if you had given it proper time.  2 doses isn't enough time.

 

35 minutes ago, Ella56 said:

It is hard to go up on a drug that has harmed me so much...

 

Then why did you decide to do it? If you were going to be so afraid each bad symptom is a result of the increase, then why did you try it?

These are important questions, because you need to have a solid plan moving forward, you can't keep switching your dose over every little thing that happens.

 

You have to decide on what YOU want to do, and then stay at it long enough for the Mods to see if it's helping.

If you know You are having a hard time making a decision You have decide if you are going  to trust the mods that they have a higher percentage chance of being right than Your guessing, or You have to make your own best guesses.  But then we cannot help you too much

7 hours ago, manymoretodays said:

 I am going to stay on 1mg and work coping with my symptoms. Sorry. 

 

Ok, if your sure thats what you want, and if your going to stay at 1mg  then that should be a relief that you've decided, and you can move on to coping skills.

I'm not sure you were convinced the updose was a good idea, so when the stress from the housing made your symptoms worse, panicked it was the med.

[Ella56]

I think my symptoms got worse by.move and stresses. Yes made the decision without all the info. 

 

I think when i got the depersonalization feeling the second day at 1.5mg i thought it was bringing back bad feelings. I didnt have the depersonalization on the 1mg. Truth is still undecided.

 

I am trying decide this and what place to take.

 

[Ella56]

40 minutes ago, Ella56 said:

I think my symptoms got worse by.move and stresses. Yes made the decision without all the info. 

 

I think when i got the depersonalization feeling the second day at 1.5mg i thought it was bringing back bad feelings. I didnt have the depersonalization on the 1mg. Truth i am still undecided. Can u explain the whole science or your experience why 1.5 might work better then 1mg. ? 

 

 

I am trying decide this and where to move the same week it is daunting. 

Thank you. 

 

 

[manymoretodays]

@Colonial,

Members can always use non-drug coping skills right off the bat.  Never to early to hone up on them, and practice new ways of dealing with intensities of feelings, or neuroemotions.  I was confused by the way you stated the below.  Maybe that's what you meant to say.  The change in dose is done, let's try and help Ella56 stay with it now for a whole week.  You are helping a lot, and are a great support, thank you.

3 hours ago, Colonial said:

 

 

Ok, if your sure thats what you want, and if your going to stay at 1mg  then that should be a relief that you've decided, and you can move on to coping skills.

I'm not sure you were convinced the updose was a good idea, so when the stress from the housing made your symptoms worse, panicked it was the med.

 

@Ella56, 

I think you will be okay, sticking with your more recent decision, and 1 mg of sertraline,  for a whole week now.  Don't forget the notes.  Then we can see more clearly what might benefit.  You panicked, I think, and made another drug change.  It happens.  I know it's tough going right now.

 

Looking forward to your notes.  Put the day, or date at the top, and try to get the 24 hours, all in one post.

 

Good job.  You made it through today.  Have a great restful night and good sleep now.

 

L, P, H, and G,

mmt

Edited March 21, 2020 by manymoretodays

[Ella56]

March 21st .

So my whole body or inside of me has been screaming , no, when it comes to taking more drugs, but reading alto and colonials comments yesterday morn march 20th...i ended up taking 1.5 mg celexa again yesterday. I had a bit of depersonalized feeling again at 6pm last night. So 3 out of 4 days i have taken 1.5 mg celexa now.

Havent slept much stressed over it and noticing every symptom. Fell asleep for awhile last night 10pm but woke in panic at 12am. I am very unclear and hopefully wont go back and force all day today too...330 am and awake again. So this decision/ change is effecting my sleep. So now im crying. What is wrong with me that i cant do this clearly. I just know what these meds have done to me andi i am just so scared to be taking them still. ..5ml is a big deal to me because i will have to come down again and it is changing me again. 

This is whst is going on for me. I didnt put my notes in because i didnt know if i could stay with this again today. I am going to have to stable on this now. I know i am going to be scared for next 3 days on What its going to do to me. I just dont want these drugs controlling me anymore. I dont know if this is working yet all i know is it is controlling me again. The wd symptoms may of needed this, time will tell, but it is still the drug affecting my mental state. I feel sick still. 

[Ella56]

March 20 notes.

12am awake, fear in stomach over this med change, headache

2am still awake anxiety

3am still awake worried

Fell asleep til 645am

9am stomach sick 

11am ringing in my head

1pm took 1.5 mg celexa

4pm head ringing, heat wave, tired

6pm a bit depersonalization again, worry

8pm bath

10pm til midnight slept but woke up 1230 am in panic.

[Colonial]

@manymoretodays  Yes, I meant that if Ella had made the decision to stay on the 1mg, that would relieve the stress of worrying about that decision, if symptoms being from the change, etc. My concern was the worry about if the change was the right decision was adding more underlining stress which would "create" more symptoms.  Now she could focus all of Her attention on the coping skills and the housing.  Thanks! ❤️

[Altostrata]

Ella, please continue to take 1.5mg Celexa at the same time each day. It will take at least 4-7 days of CONSISTENT dosing to see what it does.

 

My guess is an increase will help. You need to stick to it to give it a good trial. In the meantime, your symptoms may come and go. You are in a high-stress situation that might cause anyone to lose sleep. Just hang in there, you'll get through this.

[Ella56]

@Altostrata sorry to bother u again. i should never of try to do a med change ar this time. I have now. What do u think if i just do 1.25 for the next week? 

[Colonial]

can you let Alto know what your reasons are for that, and why you don't want to stay at 1.5 which you have taken 3 out of 4 days from now?

Do you understand the danger of constantly changing your dose so many times and how many times you have been warned against doing that?

Do you understand it will make you worse than better to keep changing to a new dose?

 

 

[Altostrata]

I'm done dickering about the dosage, Ella. Pick a dosage and stick to it. It's up to you.

[Ella56]

4 hours ago, Colonial said:

can you let Alto know what your reasons are for that, and why you don't want to stay at 1.5 which you have taken 3 out of 4 days from now?

Do you understand the danger of constantly changing your dose so many times and how many times you have been warned against doing that?

Do you understand it will make you worse than better to keep changing to a new dose?

 

 

I am feeling shaky, drugged. What are the dangers?  I think i am in it tonight  I already feel I have made myself worse and dont know what to do now. Definitely off again

 

I am off track and dont know how to get back to the little bit of stability i was starting to feel at 1mg.

 

Tonight i feel hopeless again. Now altostrata does not want to discuss it anymore.  I am having all the bad symptoms again feeling helpless and crying spell and emotional pain again. Does every updoze or going down have symptoms and will i get stabilization again in 7day

[Colonial]

I think your issue is stress related from the housing.

You did not have a reaction to going back up to 1.5 in my opinion. You were not on it long enough I don't think.

I do not think your symptoms were from going up to 1.5, as they were symptoms you admitted You had before.

You took 1.5 on the 17th and the 18th, then back to 1mg the 19th, and back up to 1.5 yesterday the 20th.

 

Your brain needs a good week to adjust to the new dose, but your not staying at the new dose consistently or long enough.

You can NOT as You asked Alto, just take a dose "for a week" and see how it goes and keep changing it.

What dose did you take today?

 

[Ella56]

 I took 1.5 mg today. 

The feeling hopeless, crying spell shakiness and adrenal surges are bad again.

I am a mess again, from something. 

Would rather have the rage and exercise then the pain in my stomach from the unstableness if my nervous system., which is why i changed. But what do i know just trying to fugure it out. 

[Colonial]

Ok, so you need to put in your signature line that you updosed on the 17th to 1.5mg.

We have to wait a bit to see if it helps. You missed one dose at the 1.5 yesterday, so, really, your not that far in the new dose.

Your a mess because your having housing issues and you allowing your fear of the medication to run wild.

Your not going to get better if your afraid every time you have a symptom.

 

When are you moving?  Do you have a plan for that?

 

[Ella56]

No i dont have a place yet. 

[Colonial]

Did you talk with someone in the government about your legal rights and options are in the Emergency?

When are you supposed to be out?

 

[Ella56]

1 minute ago, Colonial said:

Did you talk with someone in the government about your legal rights and options are in the Emergency?

When are you supposed to be 

I cant do that. I move 28th.

 

Is it normal to have all these symptoms on an updoze?

[Colonial]

 

Well, if your moving in 1 week, and you don't think You have anywhere to go, that is why your system is so upset.

The sooner you resolve this, the sooner you will stabilize.

 

Yes, You can have any symptom either up or down dosing.

But you had no real symptom change reinstating, this is only an increase of 50% of the reinstatement amount.

I don't believe it's the med change as much as it's your housing situation, and your just fearing  a reaction.