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☼ Hanna72: I will be free


Hanna72

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  • Mentor

Hi @Erell 

I am ok, rocking back and forward between waves and windows. Thanks for asking

I just read brass monkeys essay yesterday, a good informative read for me. Acceptance is what stood out for me, something I have been struggling with. 
When I am in a window it almost feels like a high for me, and then bam back in a wave I feel like I am at square one.

How are you doing?

Hugs to you💖

Prescribed Paxil 20 mg year 2000 for panic attacks.

Many attempts through out the years to quit.

2019 tapered from 20 mg to 10 mg. Got stuck there, decided to bridge with Fluoxetine. 
2020 March off Fluoxetine 

2020 Oct- nov started deteriorating, followed by severe crash. 2021 Reinstated fluoxetine by small amount, until I reach 9 mg

Tapering 10% every 4-6 weeks and longer holds if necessary 

12/5 2021- 8.5 21/5 8.0 15/6 7.5 20/6 7.2 changed to liquid tapering 10/7  7.0  19/7 6.5 20/8 5.8 20/9 5.2 20/10 4.7

20/11 4.2

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  • Moderator

Hello 

Yes, Brassmonkey essay is a huge work and is very relevant to help understand WD !

 

I understand  : it is very difficult to accept the fact healing is not linear. We are easily discouraged when we fall back into a wave after feeling better.

But the fact that you had nice windows show that you are on the right path...☀️

 

Must confess i admire you for being able to work while riding this bumpy road !

 

You are so strong dear ! I know you'll be ok ❤

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam 2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.64mg (4 Nov 2021) / 6.72mg (8 oct 2021) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

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  • Mentor

Thank you so much for your kind words🙏
I am not stronger I feel then any of you in here. I did miss a few days off of work, while switching to Prozac. You do what you have to to survive, anger pushed me, the anger towards the « mentally ill » labelling I have had on my back for 20 years, anger towards psychiatrists, and big pharma.


You will also survive Erell, we all will, never stop believing in that. Sometimes it’s the only thing I held on to, still do


Lets go 💪

Prescribed Paxil 20 mg year 2000 for panic attacks.

Many attempts through out the years to quit.

2019 tapered from 20 mg to 10 mg. Got stuck there, decided to bridge with Fluoxetine. 
2020 March off Fluoxetine 

2020 Oct- nov started deteriorating, followed by severe crash. 2021 Reinstated fluoxetine by small amount, until I reach 9 mg

Tapering 10% every 4-6 weeks and longer holds if necessary 

12/5 2021- 8.5 21/5 8.0 15/6 7.5 20/6 7.2 changed to liquid tapering 10/7  7.0  19/7 6.5 20/8 5.8 20/9 5.2 20/10 4.7

20/11 4.2

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I  am also back in a wave at the moment and Like you say Erell it is discouraging 

We just have to work through the waves and know that recovery awaits us all 

take care both you are in my thoughts 

we are Paxil survivors ! 

October 2004 Paxil 20mg - October 2018, 14 years

Nov 2018 Pregabalin - 2x50 mg a day to help with Paxil WD

August 2019 Pregabalin - 2 x 25mg a day 

April 2020 Pregabalin - 45mg, May 40mg, June 35mg, beg July 30mg, end July 25mg, Aug 24mg 

June 2021   Pregabalin - 14mg,

October 2018 Paxil - 20 mg, November 15mg, December 10mg  

February 2019 Paxil- 7.5mg crashed, February 8.5mg, Nov 8mg 

March 2020 Paxil - 7.2mg, April 6.5mg, May 5.9mg, June 5.4mg, July 4.8mg, December 4.5mg 

January 2021 Paxil - 4mg, February 3.6mg, March 3.2mg, April 2.9mg, Aug 2.7mg, Sept 2.4mg, Oct 2.2mg, Nov 2mg

 

these dates are approximate 

 

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  • Mentor

Yes @Longroadhome 💪

Hugs to you💖

Prescribed Paxil 20 mg year 2000 for panic attacks.

Many attempts through out the years to quit.

2019 tapered from 20 mg to 10 mg. Got stuck there, decided to bridge with Fluoxetine. 
2020 March off Fluoxetine 

2020 Oct- nov started deteriorating, followed by severe crash. 2021 Reinstated fluoxetine by small amount, until I reach 9 mg

Tapering 10% every 4-6 weeks and longer holds if necessary 

12/5 2021- 8.5 21/5 8.0 15/6 7.5 20/6 7.2 changed to liquid tapering 10/7  7.0  19/7 6.5 20/8 5.8 20/9 5.2 20/10 4.7

20/11 4.2

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  • Mentor

Hi everyone 

A quick update 

I am reaching 4 months drug free, Yay 😀 This is by far the longest period I have been med free in 20 years
I am doing fairly good, some days are better then others, rocking between waves and windows. Slowly the windows are coming in more frequently. 
I have minimum physical symptoms, the symptoms I am dealing with are more emotional. 
Everything feels more intense then when I was on Paxil, and I am learning that it’s normal since I am not numb anymore and it is new to me.


I am in the midst of painting my appartement so that’s shows that my energy is coming back😃

I would never have imagined being were I am at today, sometimes it feels unreal that I have finally made it drug free, and I have this site to thank for sure.

You can do anything that you set your mind on🙏

Take care and enjoy your day💖

Prescribed Paxil 20 mg year 2000 for panic attacks.

Many attempts through out the years to quit.

2019 tapered from 20 mg to 10 mg. Got stuck there, decided to bridge with Fluoxetine. 
2020 March off Fluoxetine 

2020 Oct- nov started deteriorating, followed by severe crash. 2021 Reinstated fluoxetine by small amount, until I reach 9 mg

Tapering 10% every 4-6 weeks and longer holds if necessary 

12/5 2021- 8.5 21/5 8.0 15/6 7.5 20/6 7.2 changed to liquid tapering 10/7  7.0  19/7 6.5 20/8 5.8 20/9 5.2 20/10 4.7

20/11 4.2

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That’s such great news Hanna 

well done 👍 to you 

courage and determination play a big part 

and you my friend have both in abundance !!! 

October 2004 Paxil 20mg - October 2018, 14 years

Nov 2018 Pregabalin - 2x50 mg a day to help with Paxil WD

August 2019 Pregabalin - 2 x 25mg a day 

April 2020 Pregabalin - 45mg, May 40mg, June 35mg, beg July 30mg, end July 25mg, Aug 24mg 

June 2021   Pregabalin - 14mg,

October 2018 Paxil - 20 mg, November 15mg, December 10mg  

February 2019 Paxil- 7.5mg crashed, February 8.5mg, Nov 8mg 

March 2020 Paxil - 7.2mg, April 6.5mg, May 5.9mg, June 5.4mg, July 4.8mg, December 4.5mg 

January 2021 Paxil - 4mg, February 3.6mg, March 3.2mg, April 2.9mg, Aug 2.7mg, Sept 2.4mg, Oct 2.2mg, Nov 2mg

 

these dates are approximate 

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Well done.  It's good to hear that you are doing so well.  Please continue to update us.  It will be appreciated.

 MISSION ACCOMPLISHED:    13 November 2021 -  0mg Pristiq      

Woohoo!!!  Finally off Pristiq   

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021   LAST DOSE 0.0025mg

My full tapering program     My Intro (goes to my tapering graph)    My website

PLEASE NOTE:  I am not a medical professional.  I provide information and make suggestions.  I do not provide tapering advice via PM.  Please post questions in your Introduction topic.  Please do not tag me for any reason.  I am an unpaid volunteer and assist members if I am able to and when I have the time.  Thank you for your understanding.

Mid Nov 2021 changed to low carb diet due to diabetes & cholesterol.  Lost 1/16 body weight, BP has reduced a lot. 

Links to my exercises and weights.  I also do 3 x 5.5 min with HIIT on exercise bike with 20 secs/min as fast as I can cycle.

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  • Moderator

Oh dear Hannah,

 

It is so good to have some good news from you ❤

Enjoy this new freedom 🤗

 

Keep us updated

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam 2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.64mg (4 Nov 2021) / 6.72mg (8 oct 2021) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

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It is great to read such good news, this should make all of us determined to do it too.

enjoy your life hanaa❤.

i wasn't on a certain drug all the period. i took many drugs many times and for no very long period but to simplify.

--fluvoxamine maleate100 mg + amisulpride 200mg------started july 2012 and total taper in february 2015 ( 9 months without drugs then)

--sertraline 100mg -------started november 2015 and total taper (withoud reduction slowly) in november 2016( 4 months withoud drugs then).

--sertraline 100mg + quetiabine 25mg ( started in mars 2016 and for 7 months) then fluvoxamine maleate 100mg again for another 7months and after that a something like to use every drug for 14 days and for about 1.5 years.

--my last drug was trintellix 10 mg ( used it in 12/2018and total taper in 4/2019).

symptomts i have now ( bad concentration and problems in short and long memory+ bad depersonalization).

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  • Mentor

Amazing to hear! Glad you are feeling better! 😊

I follow The Plant Paradox lifestyle by Dr.Gundry. This lifestyle has given me my life back and I feel better than I have ever felt in my life. It has enabled me to finally get off of this medication and truly live my life. Nutrition is the key to health!!!!! 

2008 to 2019  - 20 mg Paroxetine

Attempted 2 CT's around the 5-6 year mark. Were absolutely terrible and reinstated. Was never explained by the doctor the seriousness of the short half life of this drug. 

2017 - Attempted a tapered discontinuation of this drug and reinstated after being unsuccessful.

2019 - Feb. 12 - After a three month taper I am off of paroxetine. The 3 months were terrible, awful withdrawal feelings. I followed the doctors guidelines for the reduction of this drug and now know it was way too fast. 
2019 - Oct. 12 - 8 months off paroxetine. 75% improvement since coming off the drug. Definitely have had tons of challenges along the way. Let’s go!!!! 

2021 - Feb. 12 - 24 months off paroxetine. I have minor challenges now. Tinnitus/Headaches are still around but are reduced by a massive amount. 

 

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  • Mentor

Thank you my fellow survivors for your kind words as always. I appreciate you all🙏

Prescribed Paxil 20 mg year 2000 for panic attacks.

Many attempts through out the years to quit.

2019 tapered from 20 mg to 10 mg. Got stuck there, decided to bridge with Fluoxetine. 
2020 March off Fluoxetine 

2020 Oct- nov started deteriorating, followed by severe crash. 2021 Reinstated fluoxetine by small amount, until I reach 9 mg

Tapering 10% every 4-6 weeks and longer holds if necessary 

12/5 2021- 8.5 21/5 8.0 15/6 7.5 20/6 7.2 changed to liquid tapering 10/7  7.0  19/7 6.5 20/8 5.8 20/9 5.2 20/10 4.7

20/11 4.2

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  • Mentor
On 7/4/2020 at 8:48 AM, PerAsperaAdAstra said:

I'm nowhere near where you are, but going down from 30mg to 20mg nearly did not cause any bumps. Your rooting is really helpful. 

@PerAsperaAdAstra
Thank you🙏
I am sorry I missed your message 

Remember that EVERY reduction is huge. I will be sure to root for you on the sideline 💪

Patience and time, and you will get there🥰

 

Prescribed Paxil 20 mg year 2000 for panic attacks.

Many attempts through out the years to quit.

2019 tapered from 20 mg to 10 mg. Got stuck there, decided to bridge with Fluoxetine. 
2020 March off Fluoxetine 

2020 Oct- nov started deteriorating, followed by severe crash. 2021 Reinstated fluoxetine by small amount, until I reach 9 mg

Tapering 10% every 4-6 weeks and longer holds if necessary 

12/5 2021- 8.5 21/5 8.0 15/6 7.5 20/6 7.2 changed to liquid tapering 10/7  7.0  19/7 6.5 20/8 5.8 20/9 5.2 20/10 4.7

20/11 4.2

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Hi Hanna. Four months drug free is so good. Every month after I stopped trazodone I felt better and better. Six months felt nice and one year was even better. You have a lot to look forward to, and you are painting your room. This is excellent that your energy is coming back. I can't wait for that to happen to me. Marie.

10/13--10/14 Ambien. Started tapering 1/14  Jumped 10/14.  Done.                                                                              

3/14        7.5 Remeron  still taking this.                              

2/14         75 Trazodone   -    Tapered by dry cutting all the way down.

1/16        4 mg Trazodone  -  Jumped. Bad mistake. Got hit with late withdrawal 6 weeks later. Had to reinstate.

4/16        Reinstated 1 mg, updose to 2 mg Trazodone

2/19        .04 Trazodone. Walked off.  Done.

10/3/19  Started 7.5 Mirtazapine taper cut to .073 gram weight, pill weighs .076

4/5/20    New Mirtazapine Taper - Compound Liquid 7.35 mg April '20, 7.25 mg May, 7.05 mg June, 6.99 mg June, 6.78 mg July, 6.57 mg Aug, Sept 6.35 mg, Sept 6.24 mg, Sept 6.21 mg, Oct 5.99 mg, Oct 5.90 mg, Oct 5.70 mg.

1/11/21 6.05 mg Messed up taper due to syringe change. Must remember the 1 ml syringe contains 1.5mg! 1/16/21 5.99 mg

2/21 5.75 mg, 3/21 5.6 mg, 4/7 5.45, 4/14 5.30, 5/12 5.15, 5/25/21 4.99 mg, 6/29 4.87 mg, 7/14/21 4.74 mg, 8/5 4.62 mg 8/17 4.5 mg, 8/30 4.38 mg,9/16 4.26 mg,10/9 4.14 mg, 10/23 4.05 mg, 11/6 3.96 mg,11/17 3.87mg.

 

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  • Mentor

So I have been hit with a very bad wave for the last few days. An overwhelming sadness, anxiety and non stop crying. I feel like my brain is not working and I have a hard time responding to questions that I am being asked. Like I can’t find the words in my head. 
It’s a hard place to be at, and I can’t tell my family this cause I am afraid they think I have relapsed. 
This process has consumed me for the last 17 months. So I have decided to take a break from this forum and try to not focus on every symptom that I have and just learn to accept it. I have a hard time seeing the suffering in others too. So for now I will try to channel my thoughts on something positive. 
Hugs to you all 🙏

Prescribed Paxil 20 mg year 2000 for panic attacks.

Many attempts through out the years to quit.

2019 tapered from 20 mg to 10 mg. Got stuck there, decided to bridge with Fluoxetine. 
2020 March off Fluoxetine 

2020 Oct- nov started deteriorating, followed by severe crash. 2021 Reinstated fluoxetine by small amount, until I reach 9 mg

Tapering 10% every 4-6 weeks and longer holds if necessary 

12/5 2021- 8.5 21/5 8.0 15/6 7.5 20/6 7.2 changed to liquid tapering 10/7  7.0  19/7 6.5 20/8 5.8 20/9 5.2 20/10 4.7

20/11 4.2

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2 hours ago, Hanna72 said:

So I have been hit with a very bad wave for the last few days. An overwhelming sadness, anxiety and non stop crying. I feel like my brain is not working and I have a hard time responding to questions that I am being asked. Like I can’t find the words in my head. 
It’s a hard place to be at, and I can’t tell my family this cause I am afraid they think I have relapsed. 
This process has consumed me for the last 17 months. So I have decided to take a break from this forum and try to not focus on every symptom that I have and just learn to accept it. I have a hard time seeing the suffering in others too. So for now I will try to channel my thoughts on something positive. 
Hugs to you all 🙏

Thinking of you Hanna and understand your decision 

take care 

stay focused

Recovery comes to us all it’s the natural outcome x

 

October 2004 Paxil 20mg - October 2018, 14 years

Nov 2018 Pregabalin - 2x50 mg a day to help with Paxil WD

August 2019 Pregabalin - 2 x 25mg a day 

April 2020 Pregabalin - 45mg, May 40mg, June 35mg, beg July 30mg, end July 25mg, Aug 24mg 

June 2021   Pregabalin - 14mg,

October 2018 Paxil - 20 mg, November 15mg, December 10mg  

February 2019 Paxil- 7.5mg crashed, February 8.5mg, Nov 8mg 

March 2020 Paxil - 7.2mg, April 6.5mg, May 5.9mg, June 5.4mg, July 4.8mg, December 4.5mg 

January 2021 Paxil - 4mg, February 3.6mg, March 3.2mg, April 2.9mg, Aug 2.7mg, Sept 2.4mg, Oct 2.2mg, Nov 2mg

 

these dates are approximate 

 

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  • Mentor

Thinking of you! You will get through it and it will get better! Never forget... Everyday that passes is one day closer being healed. 

I follow The Plant Paradox lifestyle by Dr.Gundry. This lifestyle has given me my life back and I feel better than I have ever felt in my life. It has enabled me to finally get off of this medication and truly live my life. Nutrition is the key to health!!!!! 

2008 to 2019  - 20 mg Paroxetine

Attempted 2 CT's around the 5-6 year mark. Were absolutely terrible and reinstated. Was never explained by the doctor the seriousness of the short half life of this drug. 

2017 - Attempted a tapered discontinuation of this drug and reinstated after being unsuccessful.

2019 - Feb. 12 - After a three month taper I am off of paroxetine. The 3 months were terrible, awful withdrawal feelings. I followed the doctors guidelines for the reduction of this drug and now know it was way too fast. 
2019 - Oct. 12 - 8 months off paroxetine. 75% improvement since coming off the drug. Definitely have had tons of challenges along the way. Let’s go!!!! 

2021 - Feb. 12 - 24 months off paroxetine. I have minor challenges now. Tinnitus/Headaches are still around but are reduced by a massive amount. 

 

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Hanaa, you are doing well anyway, 

You never relapsed but you only didnt reach the full recovery.

Take care and dont panic at all.

i wasn't on a certain drug all the period. i took many drugs many times and for no very long period but to simplify.

--fluvoxamine maleate100 mg + amisulpride 200mg------started july 2012 and total taper in february 2015 ( 9 months without drugs then)

--sertraline 100mg -------started november 2015 and total taper (withoud reduction slowly) in november 2016( 4 months withoud drugs then).

--sertraline 100mg + quetiabine 25mg ( started in mars 2016 and for 7 months) then fluvoxamine maleate 100mg again for another 7months and after that a something like to use every drug for 14 days and for about 1.5 years.

--my last drug was trintellix 10 mg ( used it in 12/2018and total taper in 4/2019).

symptomts i have now ( bad concentration and problems in short and long memory+ bad depersonalization).

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17 hours ago, Hanna72 said:

So I have been hit with a very bad wave for the last few days. An overwhelming sadness, anxiety and non stop crying. I feel like my brain is not working and I have a hard time responding to questions that I am being asked. Like I can’t find the words in my head. 
It’s a hard place to be at, and I can’t tell my family this cause I am afraid they think I have relapsed. 
This process has consumed me for the last 17 months. So I have decided to take a break from this forum and try to not focus on every symptom that I have and just learn to accept it. I have a hard time seeing the suffering in others too. So for now I will try to channel my thoughts on something positive. 
Hugs to you all 🙏

 

Enjoy your break, my love xxx this (suffering) too shall pass xxx

January 2008 to April 2015 Citalopram 20mg to 5mg, reducing in 50 per cent leaps. Jumped off at 5mg

March 2016 used MDMA triggered setback

April 2016 Citalopram 10mg October 2016 cut to 5mg, May 2017 cut to 2.5mg

May 2018 used MDMA triggered setback

June 2018 Citalopram 2.5mg up to 10mg, then back to 5mg

July/ August 2018 7.5mg, then 10mg

June 2019 updosed to 20mg Citalopram

August 2019 cold switch to Venlafaxine 75mg XR

Supplements; 1100mg fish oil daily; also 100mg Magnesium Glycinate. Tried Vagifem 10mcg from mid May 2021 to mid June 2021; caused depression, so stopped.

 

 

 

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Dear Hanna,

take this precious time for you, it is a very good thing. Do what you need to do for your health. 
And thank you so much for all your kind words you said to me when I was feeling low. You helped me tremendously! I will never forget it!
Big hugs !

Mimi

 

2008-2019: various ADs at various doses, initially for anxiety related insomnia.

2015: C/T Paxil - GP switch me to Mirtazapine and Pristiq. 2018: Switched Pristiq to Venlafaxine (For tapering)

2019-01: Stopped Venlafaxine after a 10 months taper. Updosed Mirtazapine to 45mg.

Summer 2019: Fast taper of Mirtazapine. Sept 2019, down to 30mg, hit bad W/D symptoms, so updosed to 45mg.

Tried escitalopram 10mg, C/T after 4 weeks. Tried Buspar, C/T after 5 days.

Jan 2020: Second mirtazapine weaning attempt, but end of january, big wave of symptoms, back to 45mg Mirtazapine.

Feb 2020: 50mg quetiapineXR, CT after 1 week. 21 Feb 2020, found SA and staying on 45mg Mirtazapine, waiting for stabilization.

Quetiapine 25mg  PRN since may 2019, March 2020 stopped.

Mirtazapine taper, from 45mg:  2020-10-21 43.88mg, 10-28 42.75mg, 11-04 41.63mg, 11-11 40.5mg, 11-24 41.6mg, 12-03 42.20mg, updose 2021–01-15 to 42,7 and holding.

Ativan prn since jan 2021. Became accidentally dep. March 2021.
2021-03-21 Ativan 0,29mg / 03-28 0.28mg/ 04-08 0.27mg/ 04-26 0.25mg/(...)10-29 0.18mg

Supplements: Magnesium Glycinate, Omega-3, D vit, Probiotic.

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  • Mentor

Update 

I have been having a real hard time for a while now.

I appreciate all the support from my fellow survivors 💖 you have no idea how much it means to me.

I am having no brain function I feel, anxiety, depression, and trying to accept it all. It’s getting so hard, but one thing is clear....I will NOT be defeated, I WILL NEVER give up, I know I made the right choice by quitting this poison, and it will NEVER get the best of me.

Just wanted to note this in my journey of recovery 🙏

Lets go 💪

Prescribed Paxil 20 mg year 2000 for panic attacks.

Many attempts through out the years to quit.

2019 tapered from 20 mg to 10 mg. Got stuck there, decided to bridge with Fluoxetine. 
2020 March off Fluoxetine 

2020 Oct- nov started deteriorating, followed by severe crash. 2021 Reinstated fluoxetine by small amount, until I reach 9 mg

Tapering 10% every 4-6 weeks and longer holds if necessary 

12/5 2021- 8.5 21/5 8.0 15/6 7.5 20/6 7.2 changed to liquid tapering 10/7  7.0  19/7 6.5 20/8 5.8 20/9 5.2 20/10 4.7

20/11 4.2

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  • Mentor
22 minutes ago, Hanna72 said:

Update 

I have been having a real hard time for a while now.

I appreciate all the support from my fellow survivors 💖 you have no idea how much it means to me.

I am having no brain function I feel, anxiety, depression, and trying to accept it all. It’s getting so hard, but one thing is clear....I will NOT be defeated, I WILL NEVER give up, I know I made the right choice by quitting this poison, and it will NEVER get the best of me.

Just wanted to note this in my journey of recovery 🙏

Lets go 💪

That attitude will get your through this! You are so strong! Everyday that passes is one day closer to being healed! 

I follow The Plant Paradox lifestyle by Dr.Gundry. This lifestyle has given me my life back and I feel better than I have ever felt in my life. It has enabled me to finally get off of this medication and truly live my life. Nutrition is the key to health!!!!! 

2008 to 2019  - 20 mg Paroxetine

Attempted 2 CT's around the 5-6 year mark. Were absolutely terrible and reinstated. Was never explained by the doctor the seriousness of the short half life of this drug. 

2017 - Attempted a tapered discontinuation of this drug and reinstated after being unsuccessful.

2019 - Feb. 12 - After a three month taper I am off of paroxetine. The 3 months were terrible, awful withdrawal feelings. I followed the doctors guidelines for the reduction of this drug and now know it was way too fast. 
2019 - Oct. 12 - 8 months off paroxetine. 75% improvement since coming off the drug. Definitely have had tons of challenges along the way. Let’s go!!!! 

2021 - Feb. 12 - 24 months off paroxetine. I have minor challenges now. Tinnitus/Headaches are still around but are reduced by a massive amount. 

 

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30 minutes ago, Hanna72 said:

Update 

I have been having a real hard time for a while now.

I appreciate all the support from my fellow survivors 💖 you have no idea how much it means to me.

I am having no brain function I feel, anxiety, depression, and trying to accept it all. It’s getting so hard, but one thing is clear....I will NOT be defeated, I WILL NEVER give up, I know I made the right choice by quitting this poison, and it will NEVER get the best of me.

Just wanted to note this in my journey of recovery 🙏

Lets go 💪

Hanaa,

Actually I have nothing to add to yiur words and you are strong enough and will get through this and cross it, I trust this; I only need to remind u hanaa that nothing will be out of your control, you know this for sure so, never panick.

We are all with u hanna and will never stop giving u hope and support.

Please take care .

i wasn't on a certain drug all the period. i took many drugs many times and for no very long period but to simplify.

--fluvoxamine maleate100 mg + amisulpride 200mg------started july 2012 and total taper in february 2015 ( 9 months without drugs then)

--sertraline 100mg -------started november 2015 and total taper (withoud reduction slowly) in november 2016( 4 months withoud drugs then).

--sertraline 100mg + quetiabine 25mg ( started in mars 2016 and for 7 months) then fluvoxamine maleate 100mg again for another 7months and after that a something like to use every drug for 14 days and for about 1.5 years.

--my last drug was trintellix 10 mg ( used it in 12/2018and total taper in 4/2019).

symptomts i have now ( bad concentration and problems in short and long memory+ bad depersonalization).

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@Hanna72, sending love and hugs. You'll get through this recent stage in healing. Xxx

January 2008 to April 2015 Citalopram 20mg to 5mg, reducing in 50 per cent leaps. Jumped off at 5mg

March 2016 used MDMA triggered setback

April 2016 Citalopram 10mg October 2016 cut to 5mg, May 2017 cut to 2.5mg

May 2018 used MDMA triggered setback

June 2018 Citalopram 2.5mg up to 10mg, then back to 5mg

July/ August 2018 7.5mg, then 10mg

June 2019 updosed to 20mg Citalopram

August 2019 cold switch to Venlafaxine 75mg XR

Supplements; 1100mg fish oil daily; also 100mg Magnesium Glycinate. Tried Vagifem 10mcg from mid May 2021 to mid June 2021; caused depression, so stopped.

 

 

 

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10 hours ago, Hanna72 said:

Update 

I have been having a real hard time for a while now.

I appreciate all the support from my fellow survivors 💖 you have no idea how much it means to me.

I am having no brain function I feel, anxiety, depression, and trying to accept it all. It’s getting so hard, but one thing is clear....I will NOT be defeated, I WILL NEVER give up, I know I made the right choice by quitting this poison, and it will NEVER get the best of me.

Just wanted to note this in my journey of recovery 🙏

Lets go 💪

Well done Hanna that’s the spirit !!

sorry you’re feeling so bad 

stay strong And stay focused on the end of the rainbow 🌈 
it’s waiting for you 

October 2004 Paxil 20mg - October 2018, 14 years

Nov 2018 Pregabalin - 2x50 mg a day to help with Paxil WD

August 2019 Pregabalin - 2 x 25mg a day 

April 2020 Pregabalin - 45mg, May 40mg, June 35mg, beg July 30mg, end July 25mg, Aug 24mg 

June 2021   Pregabalin - 14mg,

October 2018 Paxil - 20 mg, November 15mg, December 10mg  

February 2019 Paxil- 7.5mg crashed, February 8.5mg, Nov 8mg 

March 2020 Paxil - 7.2mg, April 6.5mg, May 5.9mg, June 5.4mg, July 4.8mg, December 4.5mg 

January 2021 Paxil - 4mg, February 3.6mg, March 3.2mg, April 2.9mg, Aug 2.7mg, Sept 2.4mg, Oct 2.2mg, Nov 2mg

 

these dates are approximate 

 

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  • Moderator

Hello dear Hannah,

 

Your strenght never cease to amaze and inspire me ! ❤️

 

Send you much love

 

I saw this and thought of you

 

 

On 7/24/2020 at 9:27 PM, Katy398 said:

That’s another wave to tick off the list Tom. I don’t know whether this helps but I I’ll share it anyway just in case it does.

For this to be beneficial there has to be an initial belief that everyone heals eventually. With this in mind I imagine that I have a set number of waves that I am going to go through on this journey. No one knows what that number will be or how long it will take but there is a set number. Everyone who has healed had a set number of waves,  too many to count but a set number non the less. So after each wave I try to visualise that I’m now one wave down and one step closer to healing. A midwife recommended this technique to me. She said to welcome each contraction rather than fear it. Each contraction will be one step toward welcoming your  beautiful baby into the world 🧡.I’m not very good at welcoming waves yet but after one I always see it as a step closer to healing. 

Take care Tom, you can do this and now you’re one step closer 🙏

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam 2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.64mg (4 Nov 2021) / 6.72mg (8 oct 2021) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

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  • Mentor

Thank you @Erell

Those words of Katy397 are so true🙏

And thank you for your kind words, all of you💖
@mustafa @Cocopuffz17 @Longestroadhome @Mimi79

@sunnysideup69 


 

Prescribed Paxil 20 mg year 2000 for panic attacks.

Many attempts through out the years to quit.

2019 tapered from 20 mg to 10 mg. Got stuck there, decided to bridge with Fluoxetine. 
2020 March off Fluoxetine 

2020 Oct- nov started deteriorating, followed by severe crash. 2021 Reinstated fluoxetine by small amount, until I reach 9 mg

Tapering 10% every 4-6 weeks and longer holds if necessary 

12/5 2021- 8.5 21/5 8.0 15/6 7.5 20/6 7.2 changed to liquid tapering 10/7  7.0  19/7 6.5 20/8 5.8 20/9 5.2 20/10 4.7

20/11 4.2

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  • Mentor

Oh my goodness, having such good couple of days😊

My whole body is floating with sensations that feels so good.

I have been in a battle since starting this process. That’s the only thing I knew how to survive. All my music consisted of battle songs😂 I used to box through them, uuuh not a pretty sight😅

Now, I am starting to laugh so much, I could not wait to start working, meeting my co workers. 
And now I am dancing in my appartement with happy little songs, with a big smile on my face🤩

I admire all of you so much.

Know that we will heal.

Now I will dance some more

Hugs to you all💖

Prescribed Paxil 20 mg year 2000 for panic attacks.

Many attempts through out the years to quit.

2019 tapered from 20 mg to 10 mg. Got stuck there, decided to bridge with Fluoxetine. 
2020 March off Fluoxetine 

2020 Oct- nov started deteriorating, followed by severe crash. 2021 Reinstated fluoxetine by small amount, until I reach 9 mg

Tapering 10% every 4-6 weeks and longer holds if necessary 

12/5 2021- 8.5 21/5 8.0 15/6 7.5 20/6 7.2 changed to liquid tapering 10/7  7.0  19/7 6.5 20/8 5.8 20/9 5.2 20/10 4.7

20/11 4.2

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  • Moderator

Can relate so much on the dance ! 😃 

Everytime symptoms fade I dance in my appartment !

Actually, I do think dance in itself can be a powerfull healer 

 

Don't know if you'll want to try : I have issues to practice positive visualisation , but now I use visualisation while dancing : while dancing I can see/feel myself in a happy life, I can feel my inner strenght.

 

Thank you for the nice update, enjoy the dance ! ❤️ 

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam 2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.64mg (4 Nov 2021) / 6.72mg (8 oct 2021) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

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  • Mentor

Thank you erell😍

32 minutes ago, Erell said:

Actually, I do think dance in itself can be a powerfull healer 

Yes I agree 🙏

 

33 minutes ago, Erell said:

Don't know if you'll want to try : I have issues to practice positive visualisation , but now I use visualisation while dancing : while dancing I can see/feel myself in a happy life, I can feel my inner strenght.

This is a great, I have used visualisation also, I did it by using lyrics in songs, and music has been my most used coping skill when I didn’t have anything else. When I was boxing 😅 I imagined kicking Paxils butt and all the pharma crew in whole 😆

By the way, I think you are super strong, and your inner strength is there already ,know that🥰

 

Prescribed Paxil 20 mg year 2000 for panic attacks.

Many attempts through out the years to quit.

2019 tapered from 20 mg to 10 mg. Got stuck there, decided to bridge with Fluoxetine. 
2020 March off Fluoxetine 

2020 Oct- nov started deteriorating, followed by severe crash. 2021 Reinstated fluoxetine by small amount, until I reach 9 mg

Tapering 10% every 4-6 weeks and longer holds if necessary 

12/5 2021- 8.5 21/5 8.0 15/6 7.5 20/6 7.2 changed to liquid tapering 10/7  7.0  19/7 6.5 20/8 5.8 20/9 5.2 20/10 4.7

20/11 4.2

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4 hours ago, Hanna72 said:

And now I am dancing in my appartement with happy little songs, with a big smile on my face🤩

I admire all of you so much.

Woooooow

These happy words touched my heart and made it  very happy 😍.

It is good also for me that I healed to the point to feel happy when I read yiur optimistic and happy text hanna.

Hope more and more happy times for u and pls, send us the music yours :rolleyes:.

i wasn't on a certain drug all the period. i took many drugs many times and for no very long period but to simplify.

--fluvoxamine maleate100 mg + amisulpride 200mg------started july 2012 and total taper in february 2015 ( 9 months without drugs then)

--sertraline 100mg -------started november 2015 and total taper (withoud reduction slowly) in november 2016( 4 months withoud drugs then).

--sertraline 100mg + quetiabine 25mg ( started in mars 2016 and for 7 months) then fluvoxamine maleate 100mg again for another 7months and after that a something like to use every drug for 14 days and for about 1.5 years.

--my last drug was trintellix 10 mg ( used it in 12/2018and total taper in 4/2019).

symptomts i have now ( bad concentration and problems in short and long memory+ bad depersonalization).

Link to comment

@Hanna72, I'm so glad for you! A window !! xxx

January 2008 to April 2015 Citalopram 20mg to 5mg, reducing in 50 per cent leaps. Jumped off at 5mg

March 2016 used MDMA triggered setback

April 2016 Citalopram 10mg October 2016 cut to 5mg, May 2017 cut to 2.5mg

May 2018 used MDMA triggered setback

June 2018 Citalopram 2.5mg up to 10mg, then back to 5mg

July/ August 2018 7.5mg, then 10mg

June 2019 updosed to 20mg Citalopram

August 2019 cold switch to Venlafaxine 75mg XR

Supplements; 1100mg fish oil daily; also 100mg Magnesium Glycinate. Tried Vagifem 10mcg from mid May 2021 to mid June 2021; caused depression, so stopped.

 

 

 

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  • Mentor

That is great to hear!!!! You got this! All the best with many more good days to come!!! 

I follow The Plant Paradox lifestyle by Dr.Gundry. This lifestyle has given me my life back and I feel better than I have ever felt in my life. It has enabled me to finally get off of this medication and truly live my life. Nutrition is the key to health!!!!! 

2008 to 2019  - 20 mg Paroxetine

Attempted 2 CT's around the 5-6 year mark. Were absolutely terrible and reinstated. Was never explained by the doctor the seriousness of the short half life of this drug. 

2017 - Attempted a tapered discontinuation of this drug and reinstated after being unsuccessful.

2019 - Feb. 12 - After a three month taper I am off of paroxetine. The 3 months were terrible, awful withdrawal feelings. I followed the doctors guidelines for the reduction of this drug and now know it was way too fast. 
2019 - Oct. 12 - 8 months off paroxetine. 75% improvement since coming off the drug. Definitely have had tons of challenges along the way. Let’s go!!!! 

2021 - Feb. 12 - 24 months off paroxetine. I have minor challenges now. Tinnitus/Headaches are still around but are reduced by a massive amount. 

 

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Hello @Hanna72 - I am new to your story but love reading good news like this. And I think dancing is the answer to all the world’s problems. Hope you keep dancing through the weekend!

2008-2016 - Lexapro 10 mg, tapered to 2.5 mg over one year then CT without issues
Feb 2 - July 24, 2019 - restarted Lexapro 5 mg for insomnia

July 25 - Nov 19, 2019 - Lexapro 10 mg, resulted in increased anxiety and depression
Nov 20 - Dec 11, 2019 - 3-week FT from Lexapro 10 mg to 7.5 mg to 5 mg to 0
Dec 12, 2019 - Feb 4, 2020 - drug-free and feeling good until horrible WD hit
Feb 5 - Feb 16, 2020 - Paxil 10 mg, adverse reaction
Feb 18, 2020 - reinstated Lexapro 5 mg

Nov 22 - Dec 12, 2020 - transition from pill to homemade liquid

Dec 13, 2020 - 4.7 mg; Jan 3, 2021 - 4.5 mg; Jan 24 - 4.3 mg; Feb 14 - 4.2 mg; March 7 - 4.1 mg

 

daily meditation 10-40 minutes, yoga 30 minutes; CBT & ACT therapy

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  • Mentor
2 hours ago, mustafa said:

Woooooow

These happy words touched my heart and made it  very happy 😍.

It is good also for me that I healed to the point to feel happy when I read yiur optimistic and happy text hanna.

Hope more and more happy times for u and pls, send us the music yours :rolleyes:.

Thank you sweet @mustafa💖

I believe we will all have happy days coming our way, just depends on our healing journey, how long it takes. I am not healed, but I think I am on my way, and so will you.🙏

The music, oh my, 😆  My most favourite was for example I had the song “I am not afraid “ by Eminem playing non stop in the beginning of my journey, because I was so terrified. Then “eye of the tiger” when I needed to push through some hard times💪. I am kind of over them now😂

Thank you for dropping by with your kind words.

Hugs to you and take good care of yourself 💖

Prescribed Paxil 20 mg year 2000 for panic attacks.

Many attempts through out the years to quit.

2019 tapered from 20 mg to 10 mg. Got stuck there, decided to bridge with Fluoxetine. 
2020 March off Fluoxetine 

2020 Oct- nov started deteriorating, followed by severe crash. 2021 Reinstated fluoxetine by small amount, until I reach 9 mg

Tapering 10% every 4-6 weeks and longer holds if necessary 

12/5 2021- 8.5 21/5 8.0 15/6 7.5 20/6 7.2 changed to liquid tapering 10/7  7.0  19/7 6.5 20/8 5.8 20/9 5.2 20/10 4.7

20/11 4.2

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  • Mentor
1 hour ago, Cocopuffz17 said:

That is great to hear!!!! You got this! All the best with many more good days to come!!! 

Thank you @Cocopuffz17 as always for your encouragement 🙏

Hugs to you and keep on thriving 💖

 

1 hour ago, Cigale said:

I am new to your story but love reading good news like this. And I think dancing is the answer to all the world’s problems. Hope you keep dancing through the weekend!

Hi @Cigale 😃

Thank you for dropping by my thread. Yes I agree about dancing, it does wonders😊

I wish you all the best in your journey 🙏

 

1 hour ago, sunnysideup69 said:

I'm so glad for you! A window !! xxx

YES @sunnysideup69

Thats a window for sure😉

Hugs to you💖

Prescribed Paxil 20 mg year 2000 for panic attacks.

Many attempts through out the years to quit.

2019 tapered from 20 mg to 10 mg. Got stuck there, decided to bridge with Fluoxetine. 
2020 March off Fluoxetine 

2020 Oct- nov started deteriorating, followed by severe crash. 2021 Reinstated fluoxetine by small amount, until I reach 9 mg

Tapering 10% every 4-6 weeks and longer holds if necessary 

12/5 2021- 8.5 21/5 8.0 15/6 7.5 20/6 7.2 changed to liquid tapering 10/7  7.0  19/7 6.5 20/8 5.8 20/9 5.2 20/10 4.7

20/11 4.2

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