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Hanna72

☼ Hanna72: I will be free

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mustafa
On 8/6/2020 at 10:03 PM, Hanna72 said:

. I am kind of over them now😂

Iam persuaded now you are healing 😂😂.

The same for alot.of people who started to find happiness in their normal life activities not only in a powerful and motivating song. 

But really, We have to say thanks for every thing that help us keep healing❤.

Music was always pushing positively.

Higs to you too and please caring yourself alot too.

Good night.


i wasn't on a certain drug all the period. i took many drugs many times and for no very long period but to simplify.

--fluvoxamine maleate100 mg + amisulpride 200mg------started july 2012 and total taper in february 2015 ( 9 months without drugs then)

--sertraline 100mg -------started november 2015 and total taper (withoud reduction slowly) in november 2016( 4 months withoud drugs then).

--sertraline 100mg + quetiabine 25mg ( started in mars 2016 and for 7 months) then fluvoxamine maleate 100mg again for another 7months and after that a something like to use every drug for 14 days and for about 1.5 years.

--my last drug was trintellix 10 mg ( used it in 12/2018and total taper in 4/2019).

symptomts i have now ( bad concentration and problems in short and long memory+ bad depersonalization).

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marie123

Hi Hannah. I am glad you are experiencing windows. They give us time to rest and feel normal. The windows will get longer and better and the waves will fizzle away after a bit. That's what is coming after you've finished tapering. You are on your way. Marie.


10/13--10/14 Ambien. Started tapering 1/14  Jumped 10/14.  Done.                                                                              

3/14        7.5 Remeron  still taking this.                              

2/14         75 Trazodone   -    Tapered by dry cutting all the way down.

1/16        4 mg Trazodone  -  Jumped. Bad mistake. Got hit with late withdrawal 6 weeks later. Had to reinstate.

4/16        Reinstated 1 mg, updose to 2 mg Trazodone

2/19        .04 Trazodone. Walked off.  Done.

10/3/19  Started 7.5 Mirtazapine taper cut to .073 gram weight, pill weighs .076

4/5/20    New Mirtazapine Taper - Compound Liquid 7.35 mg April '20, 7.25 mg May, 7.05 mg June, 6.99 mg June, 6.78 mg July, 6.57 mg Aug, Sept 6.35 mg, Sept 6.24 mg, Sept 6.21 mg.

 

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Erell

Hello dear ☀️

 

I wanted to thank you for mentionning Nisargadatta Maharaj : I like to listen to spiritual teachers in the evening, and I found a French translated audio. 

If you have other names to suggest, I will be glad to discover them :)

 

 

I love thinking of you boxing while listening to "Eyes of the tiger" 😃

 

Really glad to read that you're having a nice window of joy, joy and love are healing and healers ❤


2006 : 20mg Paroxetine + Bromazepam(no specific dose) 

2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : 20mg Deroxat + Bromazepam(no specific dose) 

2013: Switch from Bromazepam To Prazepam (long half-life)

2014-June2017 : Prazepam taper, 3% drops. 

2018 to August 2019 : weaning Paroxetine 20mg. 3% every 15 days.

- 22nd August updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg) because of a big wave. 

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paroxetine. 

 

April 2020-August 2020 : Paxil to Prozac bridge. Details https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/21457-erell-struggling-with-paroxetine/?do=findComment&comment=499847

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication : 7mg Fluoxetine + 1mg Diazepam + toothpick Paroxetine 

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Hanna72

Thank you so much sweet @Erellfor dropping by with you kind supporting words. Means a lot 💖

Yes I like listening to the spiritual teachers also. They give me so much comfort and I need to listen to them to change my thinking pattern . It’s like a whole new chapter comes in after stopping Paxil. In the sense that everything feels more intense. I have so many emotions coming my way in all shapes and form. For the first time in 20 years I have to start to learn how to cope with it all and it is so challenging at times and scary. I tell myself every day, time is my friend. I need to believe it and accept what is, not judge like I do so many times.
 

2 hours ago, Erell said:

I love thinking of you boxing while listening to "Eyes of the tiger" 😃

I would not call it boxing, rather punching into thin air😆

2 hours ago, Erell said:

If you have other names to suggest, I will be glad to discover them :)

I will for sure😊


I saw that you mentioned Alan Gordon’s recovery program. I have to take a look at that👍
Just love all the good information on this site.

Take good care of yourself, one day at a time 🙏💖



2000/ got 20mg Paxil  for panic attacks. Many attempts to quit through out the years, without any success.

2019- January started tapering Paxil, 2019-October 10 mg Paxil , getting ready for a bridge with 10 mg Prozac  Took about 1 month during switch. Done with Paxil 2019/ November started tapering 20 mg Prozac  .Took alcohol and coffee out.2019/December 8 mg Prozac 

2020/January 4 mg Prozac 

2020/15/3 .09 mg jumped off

2020 March 16 off Prozac  Quetipine 25 mg used 1 time in 15 months, oxezapam 15 mg used 5 times 

Suppliments: Magnesium, omega 3 fish oil ( epa&dha) D vitamin 

“The two most powerful warriors are patience and time” Leo Tolstoy 

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Erell
6 hours ago, Hanna72 said:

For the first time in 20 years I have to start to learn how to cope with it all and it is so challenging at times and scary. I tell myself every day, time is my friend. I need to believe it and accept what is, not judge like I do so many times.

 

Don't be to harsh with yourself : you went through a lot this year and seems to have coped as best as you could !

 

It sounds like you're judging yourself because you have issues to cope with emotions. Please, keep in mind that those emotions are probably not only 'normal' emotions but rather neuro-emotions from WD. And dealing with neuro-emotions is probably one of the hardest thing we can go through.

 

We are learning great tools and practices, but we are learning during our biggest challenge. 

And, for what it is worth, it sounds like you've already taken big steps on the path to acceptance.

One day at a time, like you say 😊

 

 

Hugs ❤


2006 : 20mg Paroxetine + Bromazepam(no specific dose) 

2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : 20mg Deroxat + Bromazepam(no specific dose) 

2013: Switch from Bromazepam To Prazepam (long half-life)

2014-June2017 : Prazepam taper, 3% drops. 

2018 to August 2019 : weaning Paroxetine 20mg. 3% every 15 days.

- 22nd August updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg) because of a big wave. 

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paroxetine. 

 

April 2020-August 2020 : Paxil to Prozac bridge. Details https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/21457-erell-struggling-with-paroxetine/?do=findComment&comment=499847

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication : 7mg Fluoxetine + 1mg Diazepam + toothpick Paroxetine 

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Hanna72
17 hours ago, Erell said:

Please, keep in mind that those emotions are probably not only 'normal' emotions but rather neuro-emotions from WD. And dealing with neuro-emotions is probably one of the hardest thing we can go through.

Thank you for reminding me of those “neuro emotions “ I had forgotten about those. 
I have already started looking into that one.

You are such a great help to me, much appreciated.

Thank you💖



2000/ got 20mg Paxil  for panic attacks. Many attempts to quit through out the years, without any success.

2019- January started tapering Paxil, 2019-October 10 mg Paxil , getting ready for a bridge with 10 mg Prozac  Took about 1 month during switch. Done with Paxil 2019/ November started tapering 20 mg Prozac  .Took alcohol and coffee out.2019/December 8 mg Prozac 

2020/January 4 mg Prozac 

2020/15/3 .09 mg jumped off

2020 March 16 off Prozac  Quetipine 25 mg used 1 time in 15 months, oxezapam 15 mg used 5 times 

Suppliments: Magnesium, omega 3 fish oil ( epa&dha) D vitamin 

“The two most powerful warriors are patience and time” Leo Tolstoy 

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Hanna72

Hi everyone.

I wanted to drop by today and share a documentary that has stuck with me through my tapering off Paxil. I did a lot of research and watched a whole bunch of documentaries before I started my tapering. It played a big role in why I wanted to give coming off Paxil, one more shot.

I hope it’s ok that I post it here

 


Enjoy your weekend and keep on fighting, our health matters and we will win in the end💪



2000/ got 20mg Paxil  for panic attacks. Many attempts to quit through out the years, without any success.

2019- January started tapering Paxil, 2019-October 10 mg Paxil , getting ready for a bridge with 10 mg Prozac  Took about 1 month during switch. Done with Paxil 2019/ November started tapering 20 mg Prozac  .Took alcohol and coffee out.2019/December 8 mg Prozac 

2020/January 4 mg Prozac 

2020/15/3 .09 mg jumped off

2020 March 16 off Prozac  Quetipine 25 mg used 1 time in 15 months, oxezapam 15 mg used 5 times 

Suppliments: Magnesium, omega 3 fish oil ( epa&dha) D vitamin 

“The two most powerful warriors are patience and time” Leo Tolstoy 

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Hanna72

Hi everyone 

Just a quick update 

I am doing good. I will be signing off for a while now. So if I don’t respond, know that nothing is wrong. I am going to focus on my own recovery , keeping it as stress free and simple as I can. 
Still dealing with anxiety, but learning and using my coping skills. It’s not crippling, but I still have very sensitive nervous system. 
I am also preparing for a nicotine free life, why stop here🤩

Let’s see how that one goes 🤞


I want you to know that what ever your goal in life is, that with determination, positive outlook and faith, ANYTHING is possible. 
Yes it’s hard, but in the end so worth it, know that.

 

“Nothing is impossible

until it’s done”


Take care everyone 💖



2000/ got 20mg Paxil  for panic attacks. Many attempts to quit through out the years, without any success.

2019- January started tapering Paxil, 2019-October 10 mg Paxil , getting ready for a bridge with 10 mg Prozac  Took about 1 month during switch. Done with Paxil 2019/ November started tapering 20 mg Prozac  .Took alcohol and coffee out.2019/December 8 mg Prozac 

2020/January 4 mg Prozac 

2020/15/3 .09 mg jumped off

2020 March 16 off Prozac  Quetipine 25 mg used 1 time in 15 months, oxezapam 15 mg used 5 times 

Suppliments: Magnesium, omega 3 fish oil ( epa&dha) D vitamin 

“The two most powerful warriors are patience and time” Leo Tolstoy 

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Cocopuffz17
5 minutes ago, Hanna72 said:

Hi everyone 

Just a quick update 

I am doing good. I will be signing off for a while now. So if I don’t respond, know that nothing is wrong. I am going to focus on my own recovery , keeping it as stress free and simple as I can. 
Still dealing with anxiety, but learning and using my coping skills. It’s not crippling, but I still have very sensitive nervous system. 
I am also preparing for a nicotine free life, why stop here🤩

Let’s see how that one goes 🤞


I want you to know that what ever your goal in life is, that with determination, positive outlook and faith, ANYTHING is possible. 
Yes it’s hard, but in the end so worth it, know that.

 

“Nothing is impossible

until it’s done”


Take care everyone 💖

Great news! You got this! All the best to you! 


I follow The Plant Paradox lifestyle by Dr.Gundry. This lifestyle has given me my life back and I feel better than I have ever felt in my life. It has enabled me to finally get off of this medication and truly live my life. Nutrition is the key to health!!!!! 

 

2008 to 2019  - 20 mg Paroxetine

 

Attempted 2 CT's around the 5-6 year mark. Were absolutely terrible and reinstated. Was never explained by the doctor the seriousness of the short half life of this drug. 

 

2017 - Attempted a tapered discontinuation of this drug and reinstated after being unsuccessful.

 

2019 - Feb. 12 - After a three month taper I am off of paroxetine. The 3 months were terrible, awful withdrawal feelings. I followed the doctors guidelines for the reduction of this drug and now know it was way too fast. 
 

2019 - Oct. 12 - 8 months off paroxetine. 75% improvement since coming off the drug. Definitely have had tons of challenges along the way. Let’s go!!!! 

 

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sunnysideup69

Way to go @Hanna72 xxx


January 2008 to April 2015 Citalopram 20mg to 5mg, reducing in 50 per cent leaps. Jumped off at 5mg

March 2016 used MDMA triggered setback

April 2016 Citalopram 10mg October 2016 cut to 5mg, May 2017 cut to 2.5mg

May 2018 used MDMA triggered setback

June 2018 Citalopram 2.5mg up to 10mg, then back to 5mg

July/ August 2018 7.5mg, then 10mg

June 2019 updosed to 20mg Citalopram

August 2019 cold switch to Venlafaxine 75mg XR

 

 

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Hanna72

Thank you sunny and coco💖

I am struggling these days. My anxiety is high as never before, I wake up every morning with knot in my stomach. 
I had to place my beloved cat in new home due to allergies that have never been so bad. My heart is crushed. I have always had animals, so this is really hard on me being alone. My pets have always been my comfort place. Really loved them more then humans. Now I have to face everything with out my Paxil drug and everything seems so huge in my eyes. I have come to realise that I am my own worst enemy. My thinking pattern and emotions are all over the place, it’s like I don’t know what to do with them. I have to admit that I find myself thinking that my brain doesn’t work the way it is supposed to. I can’t focus, I have constant brain fog and I am scared a lot of times. 
But I always like to look at the positive 😁

I can work

I can do my craft

I love to read and I do a lot of it

I am aware of my own thoughts(working on ignoring them)

I can interact really good with others

My sleep is mostly good

I still use music to shut down my thoughts, it’s the most beneficial skill that I use. And I dance to release tension. I know it’s not a good look😂

I will come in here and support you guys, when I can, it helps me in a strange way. I think that everyone in here has a beautiful soul, we might all be more sensitive then others, that’s what makes us unique, and we should embrace that. In fact in my opinion it’s a huge quality. 
Take care and let’s go, we never give up on ourselves 💪



2000/ got 20mg Paxil  for panic attacks. Many attempts to quit through out the years, without any success.

2019- January started tapering Paxil, 2019-October 10 mg Paxil , getting ready for a bridge with 10 mg Prozac  Took about 1 month during switch. Done with Paxil 2019/ November started tapering 20 mg Prozac  .Took alcohol and coffee out.2019/December 8 mg Prozac 

2020/January 4 mg Prozac 

2020/15/3 .09 mg jumped off

2020 March 16 off Prozac  Quetipine 25 mg used 1 time in 15 months, oxezapam 15 mg used 5 times 

Suppliments: Magnesium, omega 3 fish oil ( epa&dha) D vitamin 

“The two most powerful warriors are patience and time” Leo Tolstoy 

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Cocopuffz17
26 minutes ago, Hanna72 said:

Thank you sunny and coco💖

I am struggling these days. My anxiety is high as never before, I wake up every morning with knot in my stomach. 
I had to place my beloved cat in new home due to allergies that have never been so bad. My heart is crushed. I have always had animals, so this is really hard on me being alone. My pets have always been my comfort place. Really loved them more then humans. Now I have to face everything with out my Paxil drug and everything seems so huge in my eyes. I have come to realise that I am my own worst enemy. My thinking pattern and emotions are all over the place, it’s like I don’t know what to do with them. I have to admit that I find myself thinking that my brain doesn’t work the way it is supposed to. I can’t focus, I have constant brain fog and I am scared a lot of times. 
But I always like to look at the positive 😁

I can work

I can do my craft

I love to read and I do a lot of it

I am aware of my own thoughts(working on ignoring them)

I can interact really good with others

My sleep is mostly good

I still use music to shut down my thoughts, it’s the most beneficial skill that I use. And I dance to release tension. I know it’s not a good look😂

I will come in here and support you guys, when I can, it helps me in a strange way. I think that everyone in here has a beautiful soul, we might all be more sensitive then others, that’s what makes us unique, and we should embrace that. In fact in my opinion it’s a huge quality. 
Take care and let’s go, we never give up on ourselves 💪

You got this! Look at all those positives you just listed!! Things will get better. I know exactly how you feel. It will get better! 
 

Absolutely! Never give up! We don’t just survive, we thrive!!! 


I follow The Plant Paradox lifestyle by Dr.Gundry. This lifestyle has given me my life back and I feel better than I have ever felt in my life. It has enabled me to finally get off of this medication and truly live my life. Nutrition is the key to health!!!!! 

 

2008 to 2019  - 20 mg Paroxetine

 

Attempted 2 CT's around the 5-6 year mark. Were absolutely terrible and reinstated. Was never explained by the doctor the seriousness of the short half life of this drug. 

 

2017 - Attempted a tapered discontinuation of this drug and reinstated after being unsuccessful.

 

2019 - Feb. 12 - After a three month taper I am off of paroxetine. The 3 months were terrible, awful withdrawal feelings. I followed the doctors guidelines for the reduction of this drug and now know it was way too fast. 
 

2019 - Oct. 12 - 8 months off paroxetine. 75% improvement since coming off the drug. Definitely have had tons of challenges along the way. Let’s go!!!! 

 

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Hanna72

@Cocopuffz17awww your the best thanks 💖



2000/ got 20mg Paxil  for panic attacks. Many attempts to quit through out the years, without any success.

2019- January started tapering Paxil, 2019-October 10 mg Paxil , getting ready for a bridge with 10 mg Prozac  Took about 1 month during switch. Done with Paxil 2019/ November started tapering 20 mg Prozac  .Took alcohol and coffee out.2019/December 8 mg Prozac 

2020/January 4 mg Prozac 

2020/15/3 .09 mg jumped off

2020 March 16 off Prozac  Quetipine 25 mg used 1 time in 15 months, oxezapam 15 mg used 5 times 

Suppliments: Magnesium, omega 3 fish oil ( epa&dha) D vitamin 

“The two most powerful warriors are patience and time” Leo Tolstoy 

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Mimi79

Hi @Hanna72,

So sorry that you are struggling with anxiety. Don’t forget it’s probably still neuroemotions, so time will help to bring some calm and inner peace. 
I’m always amazed how strong and beautiful You are! Always seeing the positive everyday. You are inspiring! I have to learn from you...
 

I wish you some inner calm and peace very soon...

Take care of you and big hugs from Quebec!

 

Mimi


Oct 2007 - aug 2008: Mirtazapine (for insomnia). Tapered from march until august 2008.

Sept 2008 - Anxiety relapse, so been put on 20mg Celexa - tapered from feb 2009 until august 2010. Dec 2009-Sept 2010: Celexa, Cymbalta. Quit C/T both.

Sept 2010 - Jan 2015: Paxil 20mg.  Jan 2015 - Paxil Poop-out so tapered very fast (over 3 weeks) then switched to 30mg mirtazapine.  Suffered very bad w/d symptoms for

                    3  months. March 2015 - Mirt didn't work so switched to 100mg Pristiq.

April 2015 to oct 2018 : Mirtazapine 30mg + Pristiq 50mg. March 2018 to Dec 2018: Tapered Pristiq (by switching to effexor) and updosed Mirtazapine to 45mg.

June 2019: Adverse reaction to short use of Zopiclone (1 week use). GP put me on Zoloft 50mg. Adverse reaction to Zoloft so stopped it after 10 days.

June 2019-aug 2019: Fast taper of Mirtazapine, sept 2019 hit bad W/D symptoms, so updosed to 45mg. GP put me on 10mg Lexapro, C/T after 4 weeks.

Dec 2019-Jan 2020: Tapered Mirtazapine (45mg down to 37.5mg), but end of january, hit a wall of symptoms, so updose again to 45mg Mirtazapine.

Feb 2020: GP added 50mg SeroquelXR and upped Mirtazapine to 52.5mg. Stopped SeroquelXR after 2 weeks.

21 Feb 2020, found SA and staying on 45mg Mirtazapine, waiting for stabilization.

Seroquel 25mg on and off to help sleep, since may 2019. Ativan 0,5mg PRN, since oct 2019.  Early march '20, stopped both seroquel and ativan.

Supplements: Magnesium Glycinate, Omega-3, B complex vit., D vit. 1000UI. Melatonin, probiotic.

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mustafa
11 hours ago, Hanna72 said:

Thank you sunny and coco💖

I am struggling these days. My anxiety is high as never before, I wake up every morning with knot in my stomach. 
I had to place my beloved cat in new home due to allergies that have never been so bad. My heart is crushed. I have always had animals, so this is really hard on me being alone. My pets have always been my comfort place. Really loved them more then humans. Now I have to face everything with out my Paxil drug and everything seems so huge in my eyes. I have come to realise that I am my own worst enemy. My thinking pattern and emotions are all over the place, it’s like I don’t know what to do with them. I have to admit that I find myself thinking that my brain doesn’t work the way it is supposed to. I can’t focus, I have constant brain fog and I am scared a lot of times. 
But I always like to look at the positive 😁

I can work

I can do my craft

I love to read and I do a lot of it

I am aware of my own thoughts(working on ignoring them)

I can interact really good with others

My sleep is mostly good

I still use music to shut down my thoughts, it’s the most beneficial skill that I use. And I dance to release tension. I know it’s not a good look😂

I will come in here and support you guys, when I can, it helps me in a strange way. I think that everyone in here has a beautiful soul, we might all be more sensitive then others, that’s what makes us unique, and we should embrace that. In fact in my opinion it’s a huge quality. 
Take care and let’s go, we never give up on ourselves 💪

As a reader of such text, I will never notice anything wrong; your words are so strong and motivating hanaa.

Keep going, it is a very good sign that u are able to function.

Take good care of yourself.


i wasn't on a certain drug all the period. i took many drugs many times and for no very long period but to simplify.

--fluvoxamine maleate100 mg + amisulpride 200mg------started july 2012 and total taper in february 2015 ( 9 months without drugs then)

--sertraline 100mg -------started november 2015 and total taper (withoud reduction slowly) in november 2016( 4 months withoud drugs then).

--sertraline 100mg + quetiabine 25mg ( started in mars 2016 and for 7 months) then fluvoxamine maleate 100mg again for another 7months and after that a something like to use every drug for 14 days and for about 1.5 years.

--my last drug was trintellix 10 mg ( used it in 12/2018and total taper in 4/2019).

symptomts i have now ( bad concentration and problems in short and long memory+ bad depersonalization).

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Hanna72

Thank you @Mimi79 for your kind words you sent my way. Really appreciate it🙏
And sweet @mustafa 💖



2000/ got 20mg Paxil  for panic attacks. Many attempts to quit through out the years, without any success.

2019- January started tapering Paxil, 2019-October 10 mg Paxil , getting ready for a bridge with 10 mg Prozac  Took about 1 month during switch. Done with Paxil 2019/ November started tapering 20 mg Prozac  .Took alcohol and coffee out.2019/December 8 mg Prozac 

2020/January 4 mg Prozac 

2020/15/3 .09 mg jumped off

2020 March 16 off Prozac  Quetipine 25 mg used 1 time in 15 months, oxezapam 15 mg used 5 times 

Suppliments: Magnesium, omega 3 fish oil ( epa&dha) D vitamin 

“The two most powerful warriors are patience and time” Leo Tolstoy 

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Longroadhome
15 hours ago, Hanna72 said:

Thank you sunny and coco💖

I am struggling these days. My anxiety is high as never before, I wake up every morning with knot in my stomach. 
I had to place my beloved cat in new home due to allergies that have never been so bad. My heart is crushed. I have always had animals, so this is really hard on me being alone. My pets have always been my comfort place. Really loved them more then humans. Now I have to face everything with out my Paxil drug and everything seems so huge in my eyes. I have come to realise that I am my own worst enemy. My thinking pattern and emotions are all over the place, it’s like I don’t know what to do with them. I have to admit that I find myself thinking that my brain doesn’t work the way it is supposed to. I can’t focus, I have constant brain fog and I am scared a lot of times. 
But I always like to look at the positive 😁

I can work

I can do my craft

I love to read and I do a lot of it

I am aware of my own thoughts(working on ignoring them)

I can interact really good with others

My sleep is mostly good

I still use music to shut down my thoughts, it’s the most beneficial skill that I use. And I dance to release tension. I know it’s not a good look😂

I will come in here and support you guys, when I can, it helps me in a strange way. I think that everyone in here has a beautiful soul, we might all be more sensitive then others, that’s what makes us unique, and we should embrace that. In fact in my opinion it’s a huge quality. 
Take care and let’s go, we never give up on ourselves 💪

@Hanna72

you may not feel it and remember 1 step forward 4 back at first but you ARE healing 

keep going 
you’re such a lovely person your healing won’t be overlooked you WILL recover 😊


October 2004 -  October 2018 Paxil 20mg

October 2018 - November 2018 15mg Paxil 

Nov 2018 -  2x50 mg Pregabalin to help with Paxil WD

December 2018 - January 2019 10mg Paxil  

January 2019 - February 2019  7.5mg Paxil crashed 

February 2019 - 8.5mg Paxil

August 2019 - stopped both meds for 2.5 days meltdown 

August 2019 -  daily: 50mg Pregabalin April 2020 45mg May 40mg June 35mg, beg July 30mg, end July 25mg

Nov 2019 - 8mg Paxil, March 2020 7.2mg April 6.5mg May 5.9mg June 5.4mg July 4.8mg

 

these dates are approximate 

 

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Cigale
On 9/1/2020 at 10:21 PM, Hanna72 said:

But I always like to look at the positive 😁

 

Hello @Hanna72 - I hope you are having a good day. I want to let you know how much I appreciate you and your kind, positive attitude. You inspire me!


2008-2016 - Lexapro 10 mg, tapered to 2.5 mg over one year then CT
Feb 2, 2019 to July 24, 2019 - restart Lexapro 5 mg; July 25, 2019 increase Lexapro 10 mg
Nov 20, 2019 to Dec 11, 2019 - way too fast taper from Lexapro 10 mg to 7.5 mg to 5 mg to 0
Dec 12, 2019 to Feb 4, 2020 - drug free until horrible WD hit
Feb 5, 2020 to Feb 16, 2020 - started Paxil 10 mg, resulted in very bad reaction
Feb 18, 2020 - current - reinstate Lexapro 5 mg to stabilize before taper

 

daily meditation 10-40 minutes, yoga 30 minutes; biweekly CBT & ACT therapy

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Hanna72

Thank you so much @Longroadhome and @Cigale for your kind words, you give me strength💖


I have noticed that my anxiety is worst in the morning, and gets better as the day comes. It is weird.

I am feeling like my biggest challenge is now, that is living without Paxil. There are so many challenges, and I am super sensitive to everything around me. 
It’s good that I am reminded that it’s neuro emotions, it gives me comfort knowing I have to give my body time to heal. I am also learning new thinking patterns, and I know it takes time to change them.

I tell myself self every day, “pick yourself up, you CAN do this “

 

I have put in my daily routine, cold shower to snap out of my anxiety, and afterward I feel calmer 🙏

Just looking for ways to make my journey a bit easier.


Take care🥰



2000/ got 20mg Paxil  for panic attacks. Many attempts to quit through out the years, without any success.

2019- January started tapering Paxil, 2019-October 10 mg Paxil , getting ready for a bridge with 10 mg Prozac  Took about 1 month during switch. Done with Paxil 2019/ November started tapering 20 mg Prozac  .Took alcohol and coffee out.2019/December 8 mg Prozac 

2020/January 4 mg Prozac 

2020/15/3 .09 mg jumped off

2020 March 16 off Prozac  Quetipine 25 mg used 1 time in 15 months, oxezapam 15 mg used 5 times 

Suppliments: Magnesium, omega 3 fish oil ( epa&dha) D vitamin 

“The two most powerful warriors are patience and time” Leo Tolstoy 

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Erell

Hello dear

 

34 minutes ago, Hanna72 said:

 

I am feeling like my biggest challenge is now, that is living without Paxil. There are so many challenges, and I am super sensitive to everything around me. 

 

Sure living without AD is a challenge psychologically, but remember that rather than your old self it is more likely that your CNS is slowly and gradually healing.

 

Your posts show that you're going through windows and waves, and that you suffer from very common patterns in WD healing (for example, anxiety worse in the morning).

You're super sensitive, not because you don't know how to live without Paxil, but because your CNS has a lot of healing to do and is working hard to adapt/repair.

Your Windows sound like a sign that you know how to live without Paxil and just need more time ☺

 

I'm really glad to read that even if you're struggling you manage to be functionnal and work. Sure it shows your strenght ! 🤗

 

Hanna, I can't predict anything, but I do believe that I will read your success story in the near future : your mindset sounds so positive, and you seem to be so determined, I'm ready to bet that with enough time you will report that you're dancing in the street with a big smile ❤

 

 

(Cold showers in the evenings are my best tip to slow down before going to bed 😉)


2006 : 20mg Paroxetine + Bromazepam(no specific dose) 

2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : 20mg Deroxat + Bromazepam(no specific dose) 

2013: Switch from Bromazepam To Prazepam (long half-life)

2014-June2017 : Prazepam taper, 3% drops. 

2018 to August 2019 : weaning Paroxetine 20mg. 3% every 15 days.

- 22nd August updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg) because of a big wave. 

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paroxetine. 

 

April 2020-August 2020 : Paxil to Prozac bridge. Details https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/21457-erell-struggling-with-paroxetine/?do=findComment&comment=499847

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication : 7mg Fluoxetine + 1mg Diazepam + toothpick Paroxetine 

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Hanna72

@Erell aww thank you for this lovely post. You just made my day🥰

Sending you my best wishes back at you🙏



2000/ got 20mg Paxil  for panic attacks. Many attempts to quit through out the years, without any success.

2019- January started tapering Paxil, 2019-October 10 mg Paxil , getting ready for a bridge with 10 mg Prozac  Took about 1 month during switch. Done with Paxil 2019/ November started tapering 20 mg Prozac  .Took alcohol and coffee out.2019/December 8 mg Prozac 

2020/January 4 mg Prozac 

2020/15/3 .09 mg jumped off

2020 March 16 off Prozac  Quetipine 25 mg used 1 time in 15 months, oxezapam 15 mg used 5 times 

Suppliments: Magnesium, omega 3 fish oil ( epa&dha) D vitamin 

“The two most powerful warriors are patience and time” Leo Tolstoy 

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sunnysideup69

Hi @Hanna72, dropping by to say hello. Sorry about the anxiety, it's a b****. It's mostly not you, but neuroemotions, plus your own worries being magnified as your brain heals.

 

Healing is happening. Sending hugs xxx


January 2008 to April 2015 Citalopram 20mg to 5mg, reducing in 50 per cent leaps. Jumped off at 5mg

March 2016 used MDMA triggered setback

April 2016 Citalopram 10mg October 2016 cut to 5mg, May 2017 cut to 2.5mg

May 2018 used MDMA triggered setback

June 2018 Citalopram 2.5mg up to 10mg, then back to 5mg

July/ August 2018 7.5mg, then 10mg

June 2019 updosed to 20mg Citalopram

August 2019 cold switch to Venlafaxine 75mg XR

 

 

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Hanna72

A quick update, and this one is positive 😊

So for the first time in weeks I woke up without a knot in my stomach. I feel so calm and content. Can’t even tell you how grateful I am for this feeling just writing it here gets me emotional 

I will embrace this day
I have been struggling for a few weeks now, and I have been working hard on my own well-being. I believe I am building up a solid foundation for my own health The connection I feel towards my mind and body is overwhelming at times. 
The strange thing is I am not as angry now as I have been towards this process. I am more at ease with it even at my worst days. I don’t force myself anymore and I am beginning to know my limits and what works for me slowly but surely.

 

What I still struggle with is

Concentration 

brain fog

 anxiety (not to day though)

blurred vision 

feeling of terror 

memory

a feeling of not being connected to my environment, like being an outsider looking in



There have been moments where I reached  out for my oxezapam, have it in my hand but put it back in its box .I have used it one time in the past 2 months.

 

Its raining here, my favourite weather, a time for my walk.

One day at a time and I will reach my destination 🙏

 

Hugs to you all💖



2000/ got 20mg Paxil  for panic attacks. Many attempts to quit through out the years, without any success.

2019- January started tapering Paxil, 2019-October 10 mg Paxil , getting ready for a bridge with 10 mg Prozac  Took about 1 month during switch. Done with Paxil 2019/ November started tapering 20 mg Prozac  .Took alcohol and coffee out.2019/December 8 mg Prozac 

2020/January 4 mg Prozac 

2020/15/3 .09 mg jumped off

2020 March 16 off Prozac  Quetipine 25 mg used 1 time in 15 months, oxezapam 15 mg used 5 times 

Suppliments: Magnesium, omega 3 fish oil ( epa&dha) D vitamin 

“The two most powerful warriors are patience and time” Leo Tolstoy 

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Longroadhome
17 minutes ago, Hanna72 said:

A quick update, and this one is positive 😊

So for the first time in weeks I woke up without a knot in my stomach. I feel so calm and content. Can’t even tell you how grateful I am for this feeling just writing it here gets me emotional 

I will embrace this day
I have been struggling for a few weeks now, and I have been working hard on my own well-being. I believe I am building up a solid foundation for my own health The connection I feel towards my mind and body is overwhelming at times. 
The strange thing is I am not as angry now as I have been towards this process. I am more at ease with it even at my worst days. I don’t force myself anymore and I am beginning to know my limits and what works for me slowly but surely.

 

What I still struggle with is

Concentration 

brain fog

 anxiety (not to day though)

blurred vision 

feeling of terror 

memory

a feeling of not being connected to my environment, like being an outsider looking in



There have been moments where I reached  out for my oxezapam, have it in my hand but put it back in its box .I have used it one time in the past 2 months.

 

Its raining here, my favourite weather, a time for my walk.

One day at a time and I will reach my destination 🙏

 

Hugs to you all💖

Well done Hanna 

feel really proud of you 👍 !!! 

keep going remain positive focus on your destination !! 
you're slaying a monster !!!!! 
hugs right back to you so glad no anxiety for you today 😊


October 2004 -  October 2018 Paxil 20mg

October 2018 - November 2018 15mg Paxil 

Nov 2018 -  2x50 mg Pregabalin to help with Paxil WD

December 2018 - January 2019 10mg Paxil  

January 2019 - February 2019  7.5mg Paxil crashed 

February 2019 - 8.5mg Paxil

August 2019 - stopped both meds for 2.5 days meltdown 

August 2019 -  daily: 50mg Pregabalin April 2020 45mg May 40mg June 35mg, beg July 30mg, end July 25mg

Nov 2019 - 8mg Paxil, March 2020 7.2mg April 6.5mg May 5.9mg June 5.4mg July 4.8mg

 

these dates are approximate 

 

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Hanna72

My 6 months anniversary is today 😃

Its à huge milestone for me, sometimes I can’t even believe it.

I had the most interesting experience yesterday evening. Had been in a wave all day, and as my work shift was ending there was this unreal shift. I experienced so much clarity and silence. At one point I thought I was going mad, but I think I felt an unbelievable feeling of the no thought and present moment. It only lasted few minutes, but that feeling of extreme calm  I have never had before. 
Had to document it in here, and I pray that this shift is an indicator that true healing of my brain is taking place.

Just really grateful!
 

 



2000/ got 20mg Paxil  for panic attacks. Many attempts to quit through out the years, without any success.

2019- January started tapering Paxil, 2019-October 10 mg Paxil , getting ready for a bridge with 10 mg Prozac  Took about 1 month during switch. Done with Paxil 2019/ November started tapering 20 mg Prozac  .Took alcohol and coffee out.2019/December 8 mg Prozac 

2020/January 4 mg Prozac 

2020/15/3 .09 mg jumped off

2020 March 16 off Prozac  Quetipine 25 mg used 1 time in 15 months, oxezapam 15 mg used 5 times 

Suppliments: Magnesium, omega 3 fish oil ( epa&dha) D vitamin 

“The two most powerful warriors are patience and time” Leo Tolstoy 

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Cigale

Thank you for sharing your beautiful, peaceful experience @Hanna72! You are healing!

 

And thank you for all the soothing kindness and wisdom you have shared with me. I am grateful for you! 


2008-2016 - Lexapro 10 mg, tapered to 2.5 mg over one year then CT
Feb 2, 2019 to July 24, 2019 - restart Lexapro 5 mg; July 25, 2019 increase Lexapro 10 mg
Nov 20, 2019 to Dec 11, 2019 - way too fast taper from Lexapro 10 mg to 7.5 mg to 5 mg to 0
Dec 12, 2019 to Feb 4, 2020 - drug free until horrible WD hit
Feb 5, 2020 to Feb 16, 2020 - started Paxil 10 mg, resulted in very bad reaction
Feb 18, 2020 - current - reinstate Lexapro 5 mg to stabilize before taper

 

daily meditation 10-40 minutes, yoga 30 minutes; biweekly CBT & ACT therapy

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Hanna72

Thank you dear @Cigale for dropping by with your kind words.

I appreciate it deeply.

Hugs to you 💖



2000/ got 20mg Paxil  for panic attacks. Many attempts to quit through out the years, without any success.

2019- January started tapering Paxil, 2019-October 10 mg Paxil , getting ready for a bridge with 10 mg Prozac  Took about 1 month during switch. Done with Paxil 2019/ November started tapering 20 mg Prozac  .Took alcohol and coffee out.2019/December 8 mg Prozac 

2020/January 4 mg Prozac 

2020/15/3 .09 mg jumped off

2020 March 16 off Prozac  Quetipine 25 mg used 1 time in 15 months, oxezapam 15 mg used 5 times 

Suppliments: Magnesium, omega 3 fish oil ( epa&dha) D vitamin 

“The two most powerful warriors are patience and time” Leo Tolstoy 

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Erell

Happy anniversary dear Hannah ! ❤

I know anxiety is playing tricks with you, but you have such a strong mindset I hzbe no doubt you'll get through this and keep on being such an inspiration for many people.

 

This calm you felt the other day, I bet it must have given you a powerfull sense of being in the now ! I hope it gaves you the impetus you needed to keep going 🤗

 

I was wondering : have you tried magnesium ?

 

I'm rooting for you, always! ☀️


2006 : 20mg Paroxetine + Bromazepam(no specific dose) 

2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : 20mg Deroxat + Bromazepam(no specific dose) 

2013: Switch from Bromazepam To Prazepam (long half-life)

2014-June2017 : Prazepam taper, 3% drops. 

2018 to August 2019 : weaning Paroxetine 20mg. 3% every 15 days.

- 22nd August updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg) because of a big wave. 

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paroxetine. 

 

April 2020-August 2020 : Paxil to Prozac bridge. Details https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/21457-erell-struggling-with-paroxetine/?do=findComment&comment=499847

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication : 7mg Fluoxetine + 1mg Diazepam + toothpick Paroxetine 

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Hanna72

Aww thank you so much dear @Erell for dropping by with your kind words, always good to hear from you.

49 minutes ago, Erell said:

I was wondering : have you tried magnesium ?

Yes I have taken magnesium and omega fish oil, as suggested on this site ever since I entered this community. Never miss a dose.

I have also just recently added in d vitamin and I drink freshly squeezed lemon in water for my immune system every morning.

I am careful with adding in too much at a time, but I was wondering, should I start add in b vitamin, or maybe b12. Any thoughts?

Thank you 😊 



2000/ got 20mg Paxil  for panic attacks. Many attempts to quit through out the years, without any success.

2019- January started tapering Paxil, 2019-October 10 mg Paxil , getting ready for a bridge with 10 mg Prozac  Took about 1 month during switch. Done with Paxil 2019/ November started tapering 20 mg Prozac  .Took alcohol and coffee out.2019/December 8 mg Prozac 

2020/January 4 mg Prozac 

2020/15/3 .09 mg jumped off

2020 March 16 off Prozac  Quetipine 25 mg used 1 time in 15 months, oxezapam 15 mg used 5 times 

Suppliments: Magnesium, omega 3 fish oil ( epa&dha) D vitamin 

“The two most powerful warriors are patience and time” Leo Tolstoy 

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Frogie
On 9/16/2020 at 5:03 AM, Hanna72 said:

My 6 months anniversary is today 😃

Its à huge milestone for me, sometimes I can’t even believe it.

I had the most interesting experience yesterday evening. Had been in a wave all day, and as my work shift was ending there was this unreal shift. I experienced so much clarity and silence. At one point I thought I was going mad, but I think I felt an unbelievable feeling of the no thought and present moment. It only lasted few minutes, but that feeling of extreme calm  I have never had before. 
Had to document it in here, and I pray that this shift is an indicator that true healing of my brain is taking place.

Just really grateful!
 

 

I’m sorry I missed this.

Happy Anniversary!

And many more healing days to you🎉👏🏻💜


PREVIOUS medications and discontinuations: Have been on medications since 1996. 

 Valium, Gabapentin, Lamictal and Prilosec from 2000 to 2015 with a fast taper by a psychiatrist.

 Liquid Lexapro Nov, 2016 to 31-March, 2019 Lexapro free!!! (total Lexapro taper was 4 years-started with pill form)

---CURRENT MEDICATIONS:Supplements:Milk Thistle, Metamucil, Magnesium Citrate, Vitamin D3

 Xanax 1mg three times a day June, 2000 to 19-September, 2020 Went from .150 grams (average weight of 1 Xanax) three times a day to .003 grams three times a day.

19-September, 2020 Xanax free!!!

 

 

I am not a medical professional. The suggestions I make are based on personal experience.

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Hanna72

@Frogie

Thank you so much, I appreciate it💖



2000/ got 20mg Paxil  for panic attacks. Many attempts to quit through out the years, without any success.

2019- January started tapering Paxil, 2019-October 10 mg Paxil , getting ready for a bridge with 10 mg Prozac  Took about 1 month during switch. Done with Paxil 2019/ November started tapering 20 mg Prozac  .Took alcohol and coffee out.2019/December 8 mg Prozac 

2020/January 4 mg Prozac 

2020/15/3 .09 mg jumped off

2020 March 16 off Prozac  Quetipine 25 mg used 1 time in 15 months, oxezapam 15 mg used 5 times 

Suppliments: Magnesium, omega 3 fish oil ( epa&dha) D vitamin 

“The two most powerful warriors are patience and time” Leo Tolstoy 

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Frogie
15 hours ago, Hanna72 said:

I was wondering, should I start add in b vitamin, or maybe b12. Any thoughts?

Just my thought, but b vitamins can be very stimulating so please be careful. 


PREVIOUS medications and discontinuations: Have been on medications since 1996. 

 Valium, Gabapentin, Lamictal and Prilosec from 2000 to 2015 with a fast taper by a psychiatrist.

 Liquid Lexapro Nov, 2016 to 31-March, 2019 Lexapro free!!! (total Lexapro taper was 4 years-started with pill form)

---CURRENT MEDICATIONS:Supplements:Milk Thistle, Metamucil, Magnesium Citrate, Vitamin D3

 Xanax 1mg three times a day June, 2000 to 19-September, 2020 Went from .150 grams (average weight of 1 Xanax) three times a day to .003 grams three times a day.

19-September, 2020 Xanax free!!!

 

 

I am not a medical professional. The suggestions I make are based on personal experience.

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Hanna72

@Frogie
Thank you, I will avoid it then.

I appreciate it 🙏



2000/ got 20mg Paxil  for panic attacks. Many attempts to quit through out the years, without any success.

2019- January started tapering Paxil, 2019-October 10 mg Paxil , getting ready for a bridge with 10 mg Prozac  Took about 1 month during switch. Done with Paxil 2019/ November started tapering 20 mg Prozac  .Took alcohol and coffee out.2019/December 8 mg Prozac 

2020/January 4 mg Prozac 

2020/15/3 .09 mg jumped off

2020 March 16 off Prozac  Quetipine 25 mg used 1 time in 15 months, oxezapam 15 mg used 5 times 

Suppliments: Magnesium, omega 3 fish oil ( epa&dha) D vitamin 

“The two most powerful warriors are patience and time” Leo Tolstoy 

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sunnysideup69

Hey @Hanna72, happy anniversary, you are healing and an inspiration!

Also, try to get your b vits from leafy greens / meat, if you  eat it, rather than a supplement....as suggested above. Sending love and hugs xxx


January 2008 to April 2015 Citalopram 20mg to 5mg, reducing in 50 per cent leaps. Jumped off at 5mg

March 2016 used MDMA triggered setback

April 2016 Citalopram 10mg October 2016 cut to 5mg, May 2017 cut to 2.5mg

May 2018 used MDMA triggered setback

June 2018 Citalopram 2.5mg up to 10mg, then back to 5mg

July/ August 2018 7.5mg, then 10mg

June 2019 updosed to 20mg Citalopram

August 2019 cold switch to Venlafaxine 75mg XR

 

 

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Mimi79

Happy Anniversary without ADs!


It’s wonderful to see how you are going and growing through this journey. 

You are so kind and inspiring for us, always the good words to lift us and make us feel better.

 

I have this feeling that you are like my angel, looking for me and helping me.
I’m sure you are a warm and caring person. Your friends and family are lucky to have you in their lives. I hope they realize it!

I’m so grateful to you...

 

Thank you for all and have a nice anniversary day!

 

Mimi79

 

 

 

 


Oct 2007 - aug 2008: Mirtazapine (for insomnia). Tapered from march until august 2008.

Sept 2008 - Anxiety relapse, so been put on 20mg Celexa - tapered from feb 2009 until august 2010. Dec 2009-Sept 2010: Celexa, Cymbalta. Quit C/T both.

Sept 2010 - Jan 2015: Paxil 20mg.  Jan 2015 - Paxil Poop-out so tapered very fast (over 3 weeks) then switched to 30mg mirtazapine.  Suffered very bad w/d symptoms for

                    3  months. March 2015 - Mirt didn't work so switched to 100mg Pristiq.

April 2015 to oct 2018 : Mirtazapine 30mg + Pristiq 50mg. March 2018 to Dec 2018: Tapered Pristiq (by switching to effexor) and updosed Mirtazapine to 45mg.

June 2019: Adverse reaction to short use of Zopiclone (1 week use). GP put me on Zoloft 50mg. Adverse reaction to Zoloft so stopped it after 10 days.

June 2019-aug 2019: Fast taper of Mirtazapine, sept 2019 hit bad W/D symptoms, so updosed to 45mg. GP put me on 10mg Lexapro, C/T after 4 weeks.

Dec 2019-Jan 2020: Tapered Mirtazapine (45mg down to 37.5mg), but end of january, hit a wall of symptoms, so updose again to 45mg Mirtazapine.

Feb 2020: GP added 50mg SeroquelXR and upped Mirtazapine to 52.5mg. Stopped SeroquelXR after 2 weeks.

21 Feb 2020, found SA and staying on 45mg Mirtazapine, waiting for stabilization.

Seroquel 25mg on and off to help sleep, since may 2019. Ativan 0,5mg PRN, since oct 2019.  Early march '20, stopped both seroquel and ativan.

Supplements: Magnesium Glycinate, Omega-3, B complex vit., D vit. 1000UI. Melatonin, probiotic.

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Erell

I agree with Froggie : people report that b vitamins can be stimulating while in WD.

 

You might find this thread interesting  :

 

 

 

Hugs  ❤

 


2006 : 20mg Paroxetine + Bromazepam(no specific dose) 

2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : 20mg Deroxat + Bromazepam(no specific dose) 

2013: Switch from Bromazepam To Prazepam (long half-life)

2014-June2017 : Prazepam taper, 3% drops. 

2018 to August 2019 : weaning Paroxetine 20mg. 3% every 15 days.

- 22nd August updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg) because of a big wave. 

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paroxetine. 

 

April 2020-August 2020 : Paxil to Prozac bridge. Details https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/21457-erell-struggling-with-paroxetine/?do=findComment&comment=499847

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication : 7mg Fluoxetine + 1mg Diazepam + toothpick Paroxetine 

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