dtid: Abilify / aripiprazole withdrawal

[dtid]

hello and thanks for your brilliant forum.

I was only on the aripiprazole injection for two months and felt sure I could handle the cold turkey as I managed fine last year coming off the tablets (which I was only on for two months too)

I've been off for three months (four months since last injection). 

the withdrawal has been horrendous and am suffering daily with deep depression and zero emotion beyond anxiety, fear, guilt and all that bad stuff. I am utterly exhausted at all times. 

is it normal to be suffering so long after being on it for so short?  

Has anyone else had experience of coming off this drug and coming through? I am scared that it had damaged my brain and I will never be my normal self again. 

 

Edited September 23, 2020 by Shep
updated title with new username

[Gridley]

Welcome to SA, did.  I'm sorry you're feeling so bad.

 

A person is at risk of withdrawal after being on a psychiatric drug for only one month.  So it is "normal" to be suffering after being on the drug for only a short time.

 

The damage to the brain is not permanent.  You will heal from this.  It has been our experience that people who go through withdrawal emerge stronger and more resilient than before.  

 

Here is one example of someone who successfully came off Abilify.  It definitely can be done.

I Quit the Cure by QuittheCure - Success stories: Recovery ...

We don't recommend a lot of supplements on SA, as many members report being sensitive to them due to our over-reactive nervous systems, but two supplements that we do recommend are magnesium and omega 3 (fish oil). Many people find these to be calming to the nervous system. 

 

Magnesium, nature's calcium channel blocker 

 

Omega-3 fatty acids (fish oil) 

 

Add in one at a time and at a low dose in case you do experience problems.

 

This is your Introduction topic, where you can ask questions and connect with other members.  We're glad you found your way here.

 

[dtid]

thanks for your kind words and positivity.  As a full time mum who has always had tonnes of up and energy its very hard to see myself so defeated by this drug. Luckily I have a wonderful partner who understands that I'm going through hell. Not being able to feel any love or pleasure is very tough, as is the anxious terror, utter exhaustion and dark dark thoughts. My brain is so zonked out that i cannot even read or watch TV so there is no distractions from the ongoing noise inside. I am taking fish oil and magnesium and have recently given up all caffeine. I know that if I ever come through this I will never take normal life for granted. 

[Gridley]

1 hour ago, dtid said:

I know that if I ever come through this I will never take normal life for granted.

You will come through this and you will be a stronger more resilient person once you're on the other side.  All the symptoms you describe are typical of withdrawal and they will fade in time.

[Lucy1983]

Hi @dtid. I did a very fast taper/CT and had all of your withdrawal issues.  I am feeling much better now and hope you will be soon!!!

[Manny78]

17 hours ago, dtid said:

thanks for your kind words and positivity.  As a full time mum who has always had tonnes of up and energy its very hard to see myself so defeated by this drug. Luckily I have a wonderful partner who understands that I'm going through hell. Not being able to feel any love or pleasure is very tough, as is the anxious terror, utter exhaustion and dark dark thoughts. My brain is so zonked out that i cannot even read or watch TV so there is no distractions from the ongoing noise inside. I am taking fish oil and magnesium and have recently given up all caffeine. I know that if I ever come through this I will never take normal life for granted. 

Hi dtid.I have the same problems as you like cognitive disfunction.  When I read I have a hard time remembering what I read. My worse symptom is inner Akathisia. In addition, I feel tired all the time. I want to stay in bed all the time. I am happy your husband understands you. My family don't.

 

Manny 

[Cabra]

How are you doing now? I also had abilify injections and I'm wotried about any longterm impact. 

[dtid]

hi @Cabra i am doing well compared to where i was. 

Its about seven months since i stopped my injections and the constant inner tension and terror & doom plus feeling like theres battery acid running through my veins is gone. Cortisol spike in the morning gone. Also gone is the constant heavy brain damaged unable to think properly. Most days I can concentrate on things (like reading or conversation) and interact with my partner and kids in a much more normal way. 

I am not fully recovered by any means. My mind still feels weaker and I am still exhausted and very depressed, neither of which ive suffered prior to the cold turkey, so i know that ive still got healing to do.  And thats one of the main differences, that i can recognise that im still healing, that its just a matter of time  and not just going out of my mind with constant thoughts of how my life is ruined forever. 

Do any of my symptoms correlate with your symptoms?  Are you noticing any improvement?  Although im still suffering there has been so much improvement in the last six weeks that im sure now there wont be any permanent damage, even with something as evil as abilify injections xxxx

 

 

[dtid]

Hi @Manny78and @Lucy1983 

im so sorry that i didnt reply to you when you messaged me.  Back then i was pretty much incapable of interacting with others due to being overwhelmed with my symptoms. I just couldnt come out of myself enough to formulate a reply. 

        Manny i am sure that what i was experiencing was inner akathesia too, that constant inner movement and terror, unable to do anything all day besides laying in bed, writhing in my own personal hell.  For me this stage has passed and now i get up and sit on the sofa all day lol.  Are you getting any relief from the akathesia? i really hope you are, its pure suffering and those who withstand it are stronger than anyone knows. Also are your cognitive abilities getting better? I can now read books and watch a little tv to distract me from the thoughts that go round and round.  I hope that your family are showing you some compassion and understanding and at the very least not giving you any hassle for taking the time and space you need to cope with this.

     Lucy im really glad that your worst symptoms passed for you in a few months. It seems like forever when its happening tho doesnt it? Im seven months in which i know is very short compared to lots of people, but it has seemed like a lifetime.  Are you still continuing to do well and get back to your 'normal' self?  I really hope that you are.  I have seen a lot of improvement over the last six weeks and know now that its just a matter of time. Thanks for your encouraging words when i was at my worst xx

best wishes to both of you and again, sorry for the long gap in replying, but im sure you understand how hard the simplest of things can sometimes be.

[Lucy1983]

@dtid From April 2020-June 2020 I quit 5 separate drugs.  I completely understand what you have been going through. Yes I am still doing better, better each day. 

Learning who I am again drug free.

I am so glad you are feeling better too! Our best days are ahead🏵️

 

 

[dtid]

@Lucy1983wow you are so strong to have come off five drugs at once. It totally floored me just coming off one. Really glad to hear that you’re getting better each day and getting the drug free life you deserve. I am just glad to be past the worst of it and am sure that over this year I’ll heal completely. I’m in the uk and we’re in full lockdown so it’s a good time to be resting a lot and letting the body do it’s work. Hope you’re having a good day and yes, the best is yet to come

[Lucy1983]

Lol don’t know that I am really strong or just a glutton for punishment! 
Actually the drugs were ruining my life. I almost died from them so I had to stop. 
Thank you for wishing me a good day that is sweet. I love connecting with people from around the world and finding that we are much the same. We all care about each other.

I hope you are doing good today and continue to do so!

Take care.

[Jay78]

@Lucy1983Glad to see I am not the only one who has been polydrugged. Of course I am not happy for either of us for having taken that many meds, but I am happy that you are doing well, and you are beginning to lead a life drug free. Sending good vibes from Athens, Greece. Btw we seem to have a very similar drug history benzos, ad and aps they 've really done a number on us. 

 

@dtidI am having the same can't read, can't watch no tv thing, it's such a bummer. Hang in there. 

[Manny78]

How are you,dtid? Sorry for not replying before.  I was not notified in my hotmail account. I am going through the same thing as you. My cognition is very bad still. I don't  retain much of what I read.I stay in my bed most of the time. I am being hit badly because of my last cut. I am at 8,4ml of abilify. Symptoms include itchy legs,muscle pain, lower back pain and necessity to pace,restless legs. I don't know what to do. I might be tempted to take more biperiden. I don't know  if that will help. I need to get off of abilify. 

[dtid]

@Manny78 sorry for the delay been in a bad wave.  The abilfy is a killer isnt it, fries your head, really dont know how you have the patience to taper when youre getting bad symptoms at each cut. I am too impatient for that and mine was in an injection so i just came off it in one go. boom like a train had hit me.                                    I know what its like being in bed all day with nothing to distract from the torture.  Hang in there! there is a life on the other side! Im still not back to normal, the depression and anhedonia and exhaustion means im just in a bad groundhog day but i can vouch that the akathesia improves and so i believe the depression will too. Hope that you are having a 'good' day' and that youre being kind to yourself.  Ive suffered more in this wd than all my previous 39 years put together, but still cant seem to 'go easy' on myself, always thinking i should be doing better, healing faster etc.  We will come through and be healed totally one day and all this suffering will be like a bad dream

[Manny78]

On 1/28/2021 at 4:46 PM, dtid said:

@Manny78 sorry for the delay been in a bad wave.  The abilfy is a killer isnt it, fries your head, really dont know how you have the patience to taper when youre getting bad symptoms at each cut. I am too impatient for that and mine was in an injection so i just came off it in one go. boom like a train had hit me.                                    I know what its like being in bed all day with nothing to distract from the torture.  Hang in there! there is a life on the other side! Im still not back to normal, the depression and anhedonia and exhaustion means im just in a bad groundhog day but i can vouch that the akathesia improves and so i believe the depression will too. Hope that you are having a 'good' day' and that youre being kind to yourself.  Ive suffered more in this wd than all my previous 39 years put together, but still cant seem to 'go easy' on myself, always thinking i should be doing better, healing faster etc.  We will come through and be healed totally one day and all this suffering will be like a bad dream

HI dtid.Thank you for your encouraging words. I have a new sx that it is itchy Body. Don't know about it. 

[saeed]

hi there,

 

hang on in there, i am very proud of your courage fighting the withdrawal. you are inspiring and encouraging us.

 

stay strong and calm.

 

thanks,

[dtid]

Hi I thought I’d write this for anyone in the future who is searching up abilify or aripiprazol withdrawal and wants to know if it’s possible to heal...it is. 

 

I came through the worst kind of hell and I got my whole real self back. 
Was sure I could never repair that kind of damage, had no hope and spent nine months craving death and planning my suicide but the miracle happened and I am really truly alive again. 
That unbearable brokenness all through me is gone, all fixed except some lingering fatigue but I can live with that. The place I was in has no name but hell and now I live in the real world again. 
It has been seven weeks since I woke up feeling fixed, and every single day I’ve felt strong and stable and most of all I feel like myself, the me I never thought I’d be again. 
These drugs are strong but the movement towards health is stronger and believe it or not I am grateful for what I’ve been through. I know to many of you nine months is nothing compared to what you’ve already faced and I am humbled to your tenacity and endurance. 
 

[dtid]

I wanted to add a quick message for the moderators of this site. I know it’s none of my business but just some advice...drop the no swearing rule. Many people on here have literally nowhere else to express their experience and are fighting for their ******* lives out here, real lives, real knives, real guns, and you are pulling them up for saying a bad word? You say you want it to be a family friendly site but c’mon, people are dealing with moment by moment torture, it isn’t the school playground. 
This journey isn’t one of peace and light...it’s dark and brutal and soul destroying so please don’t censor people for swearing or speaking negatively. 

[brassmonkey]

Because of the diversity of people and ethnic backgrounds we find that it makes for a much calmer experience for our members if we place some limits on peoples verbal expressions. The language factor between the different countries we deal with is very extensive. We are also a family friendly site with a good number of minors as members. The slings and arrows of the outside world are something that we all have to deal with on a daily basis and in many cases is the reason for our members being on ADs. We try to provide a "safe place" for people to be able to let down, relax and deal with their personal problems without having to deal with the outside.

 

There are so many things that trigger our members with language being a primary cause. We have also found that the "power of positive thinking" is a real thing and can contribute greatly to our members healing. This is a very important part of our plan for healing. To maintain this positive attitude we find it necessary to limit the negative. Another important aspect of healing is for people to learn more about themselves, their thoughts, their actions and their reactions to various stimuli. ADWD is not just a process of getting off of the drugs and surviving, for many, it is a second chance at life, a chance to rebuild their lives, refine their thoughts and and thrive without the help of ADs.

 

We do understand the frustration, anxiety and the like that ADWD causes, as all of our moderation staff have or are currently going through the WD process. If you find that it is totally necessary to to use those forms of expression we do provide an outlet:

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/1081-lalochezia-the-cursing-thread/?tab=comments#comment-9497

 

Please feel free to use that thread.