Birth Control/Marijuana

[TryingtohaveHope]

Welp, back in a bad place. I was going to put this in the taper section but because I can't taper with birth control (apparently),  I am putting this here. 

 

I have been on Sprintec oral birth control since 2011/2012. When Latuda happened to me, I was too scared to come off of it but now when I think back I wish I had as I am not sure if what happened to me with Latuda was worsened or even a drug reaction with the birth control but I will never know. Back in May, I tried to get off of birth control because I was concerned that it has been causing some issues over the years (constant constipation, worsened pms, sometimes my organs would feel like they hurt..which I know is weird to say). Another thing is that I have had derealization with sunlight as a part of panic attacks worsen (I have seen this as a part of my ptsd and not a permanent symptoms of my Latuda, hard to sift that out but I can't remember experiencing this like this before Latuda..). Anyways, I made a very bad decision to do this in the midst of everything going on and my mother dying earlier in the year. Disrupted what was known and consistent even if it was not good.

 

I essentially freaked out at how bad my period and mood was after being off BC for a month, hopped back on, freaked out again, hopped off, and then freaked out again and hopped on. I have been on consistently since late July. BUT I have NOT been the same. I thought my body would adjust but I have gained weight, got acne and have had horrible mood swings and issues with depression/anger. Feels like Latuda depression. And derealization (which its like..is it the med or me freaking out). The last time I hopped back on I had a migraine/nausea so bad I almost went to the ER which NEVER happened before. But because of what happened to me with Latuda, I am traumatized when it comes to meds. I am hyper aware of every thing in my body so much it causes extreme panic. I was so scared to wait for my brain to get worst (people keep saying it takes up to 6 months to adjust). But now my mood is still sh*tty and I swear my organ pain feels worst, it's like my gallbladder or something I know it. TMI but the other day after the organ pain feeling, I pooped and it was weird looking and forest green and I researched that bile might not be fully processed. 

 

Something else that complicates this is that I had marijuana and cbd for the first time a few times (after the bc hop on/hop off), tried to smoke and do edibles. It was prescription for my ptsd that I got as a last resort (it took me so long to agree to get it as I refuse to take things but I have been mentally suffering and won't take pills and figured I would take it if I was suicidal). It went very badly the last time. Which was about 2 weeks ago. I am not sure if my brain hates anything psychotropic or if it was the wrong strains. 

 

Anyways, I am now back at the place where I want to come off the birth control. I feel like something is wrong man. I am scared to come off the birth control because I am told that due to ptsd, pcos (possible pmdd) stress, everything going on my hormones may take longer to adjust. I know I will freak out at what I am experiencing. I am thinking of a few supplements online I've researched (HUM, DIM, Ovasistol). Also I can take progestin cream or bio identical progestin. I know coming off is going to make my body go WTF but not sure how long I can stay on without it adjusting like it used to. I think Latuda made my body more sensitive. But also, what if it was the weed and birth control mixed together that caused the mood disturbance?

 

Any help or feedback is appreciated. Experiences. Opinions. Just not sure what to do.

 

 

[TryingtohaveHope]

Also want to say I am hopeful to actually try to regulate my hormones with my diet and eliminate endocrine disruptors and stop with caffeine (I am so sensitive to caffeine )