Jump to content
SurvivingAntidepressants.org is temporarily closed to new registrations until 1 April ×

Lego: Risperdal cold turkey, and potentially Haldol


Lego

Recommended Posts

Hello all,

 

I'm happy that I have found this forum as I'm quite desperate regarding what's going on with me. And fascinated. Fascinated by the effects of these so-called "anti-psychotics". 

 

About me: 28 years old, male. I was in a psychiatric hospital due to a paranoid psychosis where I was given Risperidon, and potentially Haldol. All I do currently is laying all day in bed and just read about the effects of neuroleptics. If I had feelings, I would say I am ashamed of myself but somehow there is "nothing" left to make such a statement. I can't seem to care as it feels as if my dreams and my will were erased, my brain functions smashed with a hammer. 

 

Are there any tenured forum members which went through something similar? My story below:

 

I. Medication:

10.8 - 17.8: ? (To receive from hospital)

17.8 - 20.8: 6mg Risperidon / day, as per hospital recommendation

21.8 - 04.9: 2-3mg Risperidon / day

5.9: cold turkey

 

II. Symptoms:

10.8: psychosis, got into hospital

11.8: blackout, no memory (potentially after being given something)

12.8 - 17.8: constant dizziness, a friend described that I looked like as if I was on opiates (super high) when he was visiting me

17.8: out of hospital,

17.8 - 19.8: severe pain when swallowing food (just for a few days), hyperactivity as if high on something

20.8 - 23.8: extreme appetite, 4h sleep, fever like symptoms

23.8 - 30.8: declining appetite, extreme emotional up and downs (sometimes crying, constantly smiling in a dumb way when I was in a meeting), Akathisia, panic attacks

1.9 - 10.9: extreme Akathisia, panic attacks, insomnia, no appetite or thirst

10.9 - 10.10: suicidal thoughts, panic attacks, slow sleep stabilization, no appetite or thirst 

 

Current status:

As of 10.10: new normal - anhedonia, extreme passivity (everything has to be done forcefully), normal sleep length but no quality sleep, still no appetite or thirst (I survive of a coffee and two slices of bread per day), executive brain function defects (attention, language, strategic thinking, ...)

 

30.10: strange nighmare (see III.3)

 

 

---

 

"Appendix":

III. Regarding sleep (approx as of 1.10)

1. General: I don't seem to have a gradual falling asleep / waking up phase. It seems to happen abruptly now.

2. Dreams: mostly of memories when I was a child / teen)

3. sometimes vivid nightmares which seem to serve to wake me up, e.g. I had an extremely disgusting nightmare (30.10) and when I still wasn't waking up, the nightmare got distorted as if a TV show gets interrupted due to a malfunction, I literally saw a red square which blocked the "nightmare show" and seemed to cause a full stop to everything, like an emergency break - that was the moment when I woke up, I felt that my complete left arm was numb. Moved around and fell asleep again.

 

IV. Emotions

Generally no emotions, lost my passions (music, art). Though I can "revive" memories sometimes when I force myself to listen to music.

 

Summary:

I seem to be sitting in a prison now. My intellect is still (kind of) there but the (1) tools which it used to create things and the (2) the drive (my dreams and goals) to become active are all deleted now. Additionally, day by day, I seem to care less and less about the fact that I was stripped of my highest brain functions. If this continues, I will not care about anything in a few months. 

 

---

 

 

I am not in a suicidal state, just trying to analytically contemplate my options. I went through some topics here but as I doubt that there is an escape from this state + taking the cognitive and emotional decline into consideration, it kind of makes me feel as if I have a limited time frame to act before I become a completely empty human shell which is utterly unable to make decisions and do anything goal-directed.

 

Must I try to learn to accept this "new normal" or is there any way to at least kind of come closer to who I used to be? If I must accept this, is there any medication which could kind of being emotions? 

 

Thank you 

10.8 - 17.8:
Risperidon 6mg, Haldol
17.8: 3mg Risperidon
1.9: 1mg Risperidon
As of 10.9: 0mg Risperidon 

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi Lego,

 

I'm happy you have found this forum too, but am sorry about the circumstances. Your post is fine.

Would you consider putting a short summary of your drug history in your signature? Including any drugs or supplements you are taking now. This will make it easier for others to help. You can follow the guidelines in the link.

 

Creating your signature

 

Some information regarding WD that explains it a bit more in depth:

 

What is withdrawal syndrome

 

Checklist for symptoms

 

Regarding the anhedonia, I found personally that it's important to be forgiving towards ourselves when we're not able to do things like before. This is a very common symptom and will lessen with time. Something I did personally when I was able, was to force myself to do the things I usually enjoyed (in my case it was art and being in nature). Even if I only ended up doing it for a few minutes at a time. I think regularly trying our best without putting too much pressure on us is the best we can do while we wait it out. If we can't do the things we need or want to do, that's okay.
Below is a topic about anhedonia. It can be good to know we're not alone in it. Feel free to post and share your own thoughts as well.

 

Apathy, anhedonia, emotional numbness, emotional anesthesia

 

Something you can do right now if you think it could be a good idea is to try omega 3 and magnesium, preferably one at a time and at low doses. There is some very useful information regarding that and the benefits they can have when going through withdrawal:

 

Magnesium

 

Omega 3

 

If you're wondering about anything, don't hesitate to ask. All the topics with so much information might be overwhelming at times.

 

Your symptoms are very typical for withdrawal Lego, so I feel convinced you will return to your old self completely, but it can take time and that in itself is important to come to terms with.
In your last sentence, are you asking if there is a medication that can help in regaining emotions? If so we don't generally recommend going on more drugs when in withdrawal since it can easily make things a lot worse. I would also be careful about supplements, simply because most of us are very sensitive while in withdrawal and many things can worsen the situation.

 

 

Edited by Sunnyday
Edited links for readability

2011-2015: Escitalopram (Cipralex) 20 mg, Voxra 300 mg (quit Voxra in late 2015, no issues)

2016: Started tapering Escitalopram 5 mg at a time, every fourth week

July 24th, 2016: Escitalopram 5 mg

April 2nd, 2017: Quit last dosage (WD worsened a lot)

Ca 6 last months of 2017: Taking Diazepam 15-25 mg irregularly, less than once a month

Ca Dec 2017: Out of Diazepam, i.e free from all prescribed drugs

Now: Still drug free

Supplements: Irregular intake of Omega-3, magnesium, vitamin D.

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

What symptom would you say is the most intrusive for you right now @Lego? And have you found any coping methods that helps you? Hope you're managing at the moment. 

2011-2015: Escitalopram (Cipralex) 20 mg, Voxra 300 mg (quit Voxra in late 2015, no issues)

2016: Started tapering Escitalopram 5 mg at a time, every fourth week

July 24th, 2016: Escitalopram 5 mg

April 2nd, 2017: Quit last dosage (WD worsened a lot)

Ca 6 last months of 2017: Taking Diazepam 15-25 mg irregularly, less than once a month

Ca Dec 2017: Out of Diazepam, i.e free from all prescribed drugs

Now: Still drug free

Supplements: Irregular intake of Omega-3, magnesium, vitamin D.

Link to comment
19 hours ago, Sunnyday said:

What symptom would you say is the most intrusive for you right now @Lego? And have you found any coping methods that helps you? Hope you're managing at the moment. 

 

Currently it's anhedonia, I can't enjoy anything. Also I've lost my drive to do the simplest things (like tidying up, daily grooming, working on a specific...).

Further the loss of appetite and thirst are bothering me as it feels as I could fo without food / water for multiple days ...

 

Luckily Akathisia stopped a few weeks after I've stopped taking Risperidon but the rest of the symptoms still persists...

 

 

10.8 - 17.8:
Risperidon 6mg, Haldol
17.8: 3mg Risperidon
1.9: 1mg Risperidon
As of 10.9: 0mg Risperidon 

Link to comment
  • Administrator

Welcome, Lego.

 

That emotional anesthesia is a common adverse effect of psychiatric drugs and may persist for quite a while after you go off the drugs. It should very gradually fade. While you're recovering, allow yourself to enjoy things to the extent you can -- but don't overdo it, your nervous system is vulnerable. This may be frustrating, but it's the best way you can help yourself heal.

 

How's your sleep?

 

Many people find fish oil and magnesium supplements helpful, see
https://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/36-king-of-supplements-omega-3-fatty-acids-fish-oil/
https://survivingantidepressants.org/topic/15483-magnesium-natures-calcium-channel-blocker/

 

You might try a little bit of one at a time to see how it affects you.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

Link to comment

Thanks for the warm welcome. I bought some fish oil and magnesium capsules.

 

I am able to sleep relatively normal, though I don't feel relaxed when waking up.

 

My main concern remains emotional emptiness and drive/motivation inhibition which makes it difficult to work even on the simplest things 😕 + still no appetite or thirst ... I have to force myself to eat since I left the clinic which has been almost three months ago and slowly it's starting to tire me...

 

Also scared about my cognitive damage which I seem to have developed after the hospital stay as I'm unable to write reports / focus on tasks as I used to for work.

 

I'm slowly starting to ask myself if I should try to befriend myself with the thought that I'm actually in a dying process ... As I'm realizing more and more that I have to force myself to eat, drink, tidy up, ... - the only thing which gives me comfort is when I'm in bed ... 

 

10.8 - 17.8:
Risperidon 6mg, Haldol
17.8: 3mg Risperidon
1.9: 1mg Risperidon
As of 10.9: 0mg Risperidon 

Link to comment
  • Administrator
3 hours ago, Lego said:

My main concern remains emotional emptiness and drive/motivation inhibition which makes it difficult to work even on the simplest things 😕 + still no appetite or thirst ... I have to force myself to eat since I left the clinic which has been almost three months ago and slowly it's starting to tire me...

 

Please hang in there. If these are your only post-withdrawal symptoms, you are fortunate. They are likely to fade if you take care of yourself, including not driving yourself into despair with worries about the future. Recovery is very slow and frustrating, you will need to cope with that.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi Lego and welcome aboard,

 

Yes, as Alto said above.  It may take a little time now, for your return to your baseline.

 

Eat, as well as get your fluids in on a daily basis.  Water and more than coffee and bread please.

I don't know if you need to keep reading about the antipsychotics/neuroleptics right now.  Recovery from them will be gradual.  Pay attention to any improvements and celebrate them.

 

Try to get outside for a walk everyday too.

 

Your body, mind, and spirit is just doing it's thing right now to guide you in your healing.  I'm hoping your sleep is going okay.

 

And definitely stay away from any alcohol or "recreational" drug use.  Focus on what you hope to get as you move forward in the aftermath of the psychosis/paranoia and then drugging.  I think that can make a difference.  Find hope and meaning again.  Tough during anhedonia but work at it.

 

We've got a whole symptoms and self care forum that might give you some ideas too, of beginning healthy practices, and self care.  You'll find some good coping skills and others who have experienced similar WD symptoms too, there and in this forum.  Sometimes that helps, knowing you are not alone in what you are going through.

 

You could google Will Hall, or go to the Mad in America site too.  You'll find some good survivor stories that way.  We've also got a Success Stories forum here.  You could go to the Home Page and then scroll down to find that.

 

Welcome aboard Lego.  Your user name makes me smile.  I've got to see if it's okay that I pass on some of my Sun/son's Lego's soon, eh, it's probably me that can't quite part with them though.  I especially like the little people Legos. 🙉😻  Okay.....I digress.

 

L, P, H, and G,

mmt

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

Link to comment

Thanks, altostrate and manymoretodays for your supportive words :)

 

I was able to get out today to go to the doctor and to take a ride in the bus later that day, also showered (!) wow, lol - small things but motivating since I managed to get out of bed. Still feeling empty, desperate because I will very likely have to give up my job and move back to my parents as I my cognitive abilities have declined dramatically (bad memory, difficulties to stay concentrated, and to use my brain to complete complex tasks) and I dont have big hopes for them to return currently. 

 

Also, I am still reading a lot of scientific papers about dopamine receptors. One was quite interesting (linked here). It reminded me of some of my symptoms in September (I used to yawn without a reason throughout the day): seems there is a link between grooming behaviour / yawning (and many many other biological processes) and dopamine D1/D2 receptors. So, if Risperdal, blocks these receptors there is a good chance that it actually causes the negative symptoms (no grooming, inactivity, anhedonia..) which are usually portrayed as "inherent symptoms" of schizophrenia. This means, if people were not given these pills, there is a smaller chance that they would develop negative symptoms.

 

To see this from this perspective makes me kind of angry ... feels like we are the guinea pigs since society has no better drugs for treating psychosis patients ... :(

 

Anyway, life goes kind of on in its new shape - let's see how my symptoms will develop over the next few months.

 

I hope its ok if I use this thread from time to time to document my progress / thoughts on my post psychosis journey.

10.8 - 17.8:
Risperidon 6mg, Haldol
17.8: 3mg Risperidon
1.9: 1mg Risperidon
As of 10.9: 0mg Risperidon 

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi Lego,

 

Well that's great.  That you got on out and about.  And thanks for the link. 

 

Yes, we all tend to go through our angry phase at the injustice.

You may want to look at and contribute to our Finding Meaning forum too.

 

And definitely okay to use this thread to document your progress. 

 

We're glad you are here. 

 

Please let us know if you have any further questions right here too.

 

L, P, H, and G,

mmt

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

Link to comment
  • 1 year later...
  • Moderator Emeritus

  

@Suthan Please start an Introduction topic for yourself so you can be supported by the SA community.

 

 

* NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA *

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED:  (6 year taper)      0mg Pristiq  on 13th November 2021

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021   LAST DOSE 0.0025mg

Post 0 updates start here    My tapering program     My Intro (goes to tapering graph)

 VIDEO:   Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management

Link to comment

Please sign in to comment

You will be able to leave a comment after signing in



Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Terms of Use Privacy Policy