GADboy: 3 weeks escitalopram adverse reaction

[GADboy]

Hello,

 

I'm finding out now through therapy, that I have probably had some sort of Generalized Anxiety Disorder since I was a child. I have been to be able to manage it in my own way until this, my 37th year.

 

Things started to go downhill obviously because of COVID. I have been developing a health anxiety problems recently and I noticed that throughout this spring I was finding it harder and harder to keep my anxiety in check. I stopped going outside, except for once a week for groceries. I live in a Condo building, and having to interact with maskless people was triggering for me. (Thankfully the city made a by-law requiring masks in all public spaces). I started noticing all sorts of weird feelings in my body, and I suspect that the anxiety and stress was causing me to go into a hyper-arousal. I had GERD, Diarrhea, buzzing in my legs, dizziness / vertigo

 

I started seeing a therapist on August 4th, 2020 and have been working with her every week since.

Then I had my first full blown panic attack, which was a nocturnal panic attack and I awoke suddenly not knowing if I was alive or dead or dreaming or awake and shaking all over.

That experience scared me so much that I decided to talk to my doctor about it and he prescribed me 5mg Escitalopram for the anxiety disorder.

 

I started the Escitalopram on October 14, 2020. The second day I felt really high, like I smoked a lot of weed, and then I had hours long waves of panic attacks and didn't sleep very much.

The doctor prescribed 0.5mg Clonazapan to deal with the anxiety and insomnia.

 

On October 18, 2020 I woke up shaking uncontrollably, so I went to the ER. I talked to the doctor and he said it was normal and my blood work was good.

So I started taking the 0.5mg Clonazapan I was prescribed. Mostly once at night to help me sleep.

 

The first week was mostly me combatting the crippling anxiety. I started going outside to walk, because it was the only thing I could do to feel better. (I have since gone out and walked more in the past 4 weeks than the entire time since we were in COVID lockdown since March, 2020. Small victories)

 

Second week I had minor improvements of some symptoms, but still could not sleep without Clonazepam. I really didn't want to keep taking the Clonazepam so I stopped it after two weeks. 

I had kept wanting to quit the Escitalopram, but everyone was telling me, it gets bad before it gets better. So I stuck through it.

 

It was then that I had a 5 hour long panic attack, and I decided I had enough. When they say it gets bad, not this bad!

 

On November 2, 2020 I decided to quit the Escitalopram. I talked to my doctor and he said I could just stop taking it since I was on such a low dose for a short time. I decided to taper at 2.5mg for two days hoping to minimize WD symptoms.

 

These were the adverse reactions while on Escitalopram: Anxiety on a level I've never experienced before, Hours long panic attacks, Uncontrollable shaking, Chills, Hot flashes, Loss of appetite, Low sex drive, Insomnia, Night sweats, Weight loss, Yellow-green Diarrhea, Hypnic jerks.

 

The Insomnia while on the drug was the worse. It felt like I was "Locked" out of sleeping. I would close my eyes and immediately start dreaming or hallucinating like I was watching a tv in front of my eyes. But I could never sleep, my body would jerk and it would just wake me up.

 

I am now 10 days off of the Escitalopram, however I have still been experiencing symptoms since I discontinued: Insomnia, Electrified Legs, Burning Muscle Aches, Diarrhea, Waves of Anxiety, Joylessness, Chills, Hot flashes, Night sweats, Shaking legs, Muscle weakness, Muscle Twitching, Crying, Irritability, Elevated heart rate, 6am cortisol anxiety.

 

I believe what I am facing now is from the trauma that the drug caused my nervous system. I was maybe in a state of hyper arousal before but I think I've been jacked up to another level.

I used to have a buzzing feeling in my legs sometimes before, but now it feels sometimes like a full on electrical charge.

 

My doctor dismisses my current bodily sensations and insomnia as my anxiety, and not anything to do with the drug since it should be out of my system by now.

 

These past few weeks I have felt hopeless, helpless, confused, scared.

I miss my old anxiety. Escitalopram let me feel feelings that I wish I never felt before.

 

However, while not all days are better than the previous one, each week has been an improvement.

I am very much being supported by wife, family, friends, therapist, and doctor. So I feel like there is hope. I just need time to heal.

 

I have coping mechanisms to deal with these past few weeks:

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy for anxiety, and Insomnia

40-60 min walks every day

Light exercise

EFT Tapping

Sleep Hygiene

Daily Meditation

Breathing exercises

(I'm going to try Magnesium Citrate after reading about it here)

 

I would just like to thank everyone here, I've been reading this site for a little while and it gives me hope.

[GADboy]

Last night I tried a sleep mask to help with insomnia and hopefully prevent the 6am cortisol spike.

 

Fortunately I was able to get to sleep quickly and sleep 4 hours straight. I was usually waking up every 90 mins.

 

Unfortunately I got a cortisol spike at 415 am and was not able to go back to sleep after that. I stayed in bed for 90 mins trying to get back to sleep. I should have got out of bed and read, which I eventually did between 6-7am.

 

I haven't slept more than 6 hours in one night in the last 4 weeks. This week I'm averaging around 4 hours. The insomnia is difficult since I want my brain to heal.

 

I've never had insomnia before taking the escitalopram.

[Shep]

Hi, Gadboy.

 

Welcome to Surviving Antidepressans.

 

I'm glad to read you recognized an adverse reaction to Escitalopram and stopped it before dependency set in, which can happen in a month with antidepressants. 

 

Quote

 

October 18, 2020: Started 0.5mg Clonazepan (to deal with side-effects)

November 8, 2020: Tapered 0.25mg Clonazepan

Plan to Taper to 0mg Clonazepan by November 28, 2020

 

 

I've quoted your benzo usage from your signature.

 

Please note that you may already be dependent on clonazepam, as dependency on a benzodiazepine can set in at 2 - 4 weeks use. Dependency can vary in its intensity, but I did want to mention this so you don't come off too soon and too quickly if you think you may be dependent on it. 

 

 

On 11/14/2020 at 6:11 PM, GADboy said:

However, while not all days are better than the previous one, each week has been an improvement.

 

This is key. Yes, keep your eyes on the overall landscape. If you're seeing improvements each week, that's a good thing and you're moving in the right direction. 

 

What was your experience going from .5 mg Clonazepam on October 18 to .25 mg clonazepam on November 8? 

[GADboy]

Hi Shep!

 

31 minutes ago, Shep said:

This is key. Yes, keep your eyes on the overall landscape. If you're seeing improvements each week, that's a good thing and you're moving in the right direction. 

 

 

Last week was incredibly difficult for me, I was really blaming myself for staying on for so long, and trying to "push" through.
I didn't sleep for 3 nights, I was frustrated, helpless. My wife encouraged me that this is not a healthy attitude to have. It's really hard to not spiral down there though.

Joy is hard to find right now.

 

31 minutes ago, Shep said:

What was your experience going from .5 mg Clonazepam on October 18 to .25 mg clonazepam on November 8? 

 

I think it has been fine so far 🤞

I took 20 0.5mg pills over 21 days.

The first week that might have been 0.5mg-0.75mg (split between 0.25mg AM 0.5mg PM doses) a day.

Second/third week that was 0.25mg-0.5mg each night.

I've been on 0.25mg for 7 days now, I was planning to drop down to 0.125mg starting Monday for another week, and then 0.0625mg for the final week. I don't have a lot of pills left.

Although, to be honest I can't really tell what the difference might be between my CNS recovering from the adverse reaction and any WD symptoms from the Clonazepam.

[HopeToHeal]

I hope I am allowed to comment here even though I have not yet done my own intro. Your experience with escitalopram sounds much like mine. I am certain I had an adverse reaction to six days of 5mg and your symptoms sound a lot like mine. While on it, I had severe nausea and moderate diarrhea, a tingle and twitch running from the corner of my mouth to my ear (not visible to people, but definitely a twitch around my ear), shaking inside, visible shaky hands, hot flashes, sweating, insomnia, and extreme anxiety. I stopped because it was so extreme. In the weeks following, I felt that same intense leg buzzing sensation! And I had what I believe were autonomic dysfunction symptoms and standing for more than a couple minutes left my legs trembling and my body feeling weak. Gradually, after about 6 weeks, my legs started to stop buzzing bit by bit and the autonomic issues started to dissipate as well. I was left with occasional leg twitches that lasted about a month beyond that as well as the continuing panic and hypersensitivity. Insomnia persisted as well as occasional loss of appetite. It has now been almost five months since that fateful week and I feel much better most of the time. I still get the lip tingle and ear twitch feeling, but it is less intense and in a smaller area. It seems to correlate with stress and PMS for me and might be getting less severe each month. It felt very scary and hopeless the first couple months and I do still feel scared and exhausted and I still have anxiety (which I have had for years), but I have come very far and wanted to give you hope that you will feel better as well. 

[HopeToHeal]

I also had those hypnic jerks, cortisol mornings, and waves of panic. Exercise has been helping me a lot. I also took epsom baths every night for at least month when my twitching, panic, and insomnia were at their worst.

[Shep]

13 hours ago, GADboy said:

Last week was incredibly difficult for me, I was really blaming myself for staying on for so long, and trying to "push" through.
I didn't sleep for 3 nights, I was frustrated, helpless. My wife encouraged me that this is not a healthy attitude to have. It's really hard to not spiral down there though.

Joy is hard to find right now.

 

It's great that you and your wife are picking up on spirals. This thread may help you learn to stop them in their tracks:

 

Dealing With Emotional Spirals

 

13 hours ago, GADboy said:

I think it has been fine so far 🤞

I took 20 0.5mg pills over 21 days.

The first week that might have been 0.5mg-0.75mg (split between 0.25mg AM 0.5mg PM doses) a day.

Second/third week that was 0.25mg-0.5mg each night.

I've been on 0.25mg for 7 days now, I was planning to drop down to 0.125mg starting Monday for another week, and then 0.0625mg for the final week. I don't have a lot of pills left.

Although, to be honest I can't really tell what the difference might be between my CNS recovering from the adverse reaction and any WD symptoms from the Clonazepam.

 

The fact that you're seeing overall improvements is good, so your plan may work out very well. Please note it may be a bit jagged and your nervous system will still take awhile to fully heal. But if you can handle the upticks in symptoms, you may be better off then extending your stay on clonazepam. 

 

And you're right - the adverse antidepressant reaction and benzo withdrawal have a lot of the very same symptoms. 

 

A tip - please avoid alcohol (it hits the same receptors as benzos). Also, it will help to limit caffeine and sugar and stick to a simple diet full of protein and low in high-glycemic carbs. 

 

You may find some helpful information to handle your symptoms here: 

 

Non-drug techniques to cope with emotional symptoms

 

Please stretch or do some easy beginners yoga, as benzos are powerful muscle relaxers and muscles can become very tight during withdrawal. You can find easy yoga and stretching exercises on YouTube. Nothing fancy that will cause injuries, just the basics will work great. 

 

We don't recommend a lot of supplements, as many members report their nervous systems are simply too fragile to handle them. However, magnesium and fish oil tend to be calming to the nervous system and many people report they do help. Please only add in one supplement at a time and at a small dose. For more, please see:

 

 King of supplements: Omega-3 fatty acids (fish oil)

 

Magnesium, nature's calcium channel blocker

 

Here is some information on withdrawal that you may or may not have seen in your readings so far: 

 

How psychiatric drugs remodel your brain (for antidepressants)

 

What is happening in your brain? (for benzos)

 

Healing from antidepressants. Patterns of recovery video (4 minutes)

 

The Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

 

Please let us know how you're doing as you continue tapering off the clonazepam. 

[GADboy]

Hi HopeToHeal,

Thank you for sharing your experience! I first came to this forum out of madness because I just needed someone to tell me that it will get better and I'll be okay.

 

My leg buzzing really turned up to an electrified sensation on Nov 10, however in the subsequent days it has started to subside to occasional low level buzzing... similar to what I had before I started the Escitalopram. Overall shakiness has lessened as well, but my upper body still feels weak. I've noticed less twitching and significantly less jerking, it used really prevent me from sleeping, I was like full on kicking the air.

 

My weight seems to have stabilized as well, I'm not a big guy and I dropped 2kg in only a few weeks.

 

I slept less than 4 hours last night, woke up twice within the 90 minute window of falling asleep. Second time I woke up I couldn't get back to bed so I got up and read. I really feel the cortisol spike in the mornings and it sucks. I had some minor anxiety this morning as well. I think it was because my morning walk was delayed.

 

3 hours ago, Shep said:

please avoid alcohol (it hits the same receptors as benzos). Also, it will help to limit caffeine and sugar and stick to a simple diet full of protein and low in high-glycemic carbs.

I quit drinking in January, and I quit my 3 black teas a day habit a few months ago... both because of GERD problems. (and I had to give up spicy foods too 😭)

 

Tonight I'm going to try 0.125mg of the Clonazepam and see how the week goes.

 

3 hours ago, Shep said:

Please stretch or do some easy beginners yoga, as benzos are powerful muscle relaxers and muscles can become very tight during withdrawal.

 

My Trapezius and shoulder muscles have been in burning pain. Obviously from how I hold my phone all the time, and how I hold stress in general. Ice packs really helped with it though. I definitely need to stretch more.

 

I was also taking 3-6mg(TOO MUCH) of Melatonin, but after reading the thread on it, I'm just going to skip it. I didn't really notice a difference with how it has helped me fall asleep, and it certainly hasn't helped me stay asleep.

 

Thanks so much for the support!!!

[Shep]

18 hours ago, GADboy said:

I was also taking 3-6mg(TOO MUCH) of Melatonin, but after reading the thread on it, I'm just going to skip it. I didn't really notice a difference with how it has helped me fall asleep, and it certainly hasn't helped me stay asleep.

 

You may want to look into a time-released low-dose melatonin. You're correct that 3 - 6 mg was way too much! You may have gotten some paradoxical reactions that made your sleep worse. 

 

18 hours ago, GADboy said:

I quit drinking in January, and I quit my 3 black teas a day habit a few months ago... both because of GERD problems. (and I had to give up spicy foods too 😭)

 

Tonight I'm going to try 0.125mg of the Clonazepam and see how the week goes.

 

Did you use any medications for GERD or just adjust your diet? The reason I ask is this pre-dates your psychiatric drug use and some GERD drugs like the PPIs can lead to nutritional deficiencies in B12 that can present as psychiatric problems. 

 

Let us know how you do with the clonazepam reduction. 

 

[GADboy]

So yesterday was a little bit of a setback.

 

I had a wave of anxiety around 10am, nothing major.

I went for a walk and that helped.

 

I tried 75mg of Magnesium Citrate, I think it might have been too much. A few hours later my legs started buzzing more, they've settled down a bit this morning. It could have also been from stress also, because I had an argument with my wife about something trivial, and they started buzzing right after that. I'll wait until they've settled down before I try a smaller dose of Magnesium again.

 

In the evening before bed, I had another wave of anxiety. I think it was from me anticipating sleep.

I calmed down, and then accidentally nodded off in a chair. I think that messed me up.

I didn't take any melatonin last night since I have previously not had much trouble falling asleep, just staying asleep. I might try to cut up a pill tonight and try again.

 

From 1230 - 130 am I tried sleeping, when I couldn't I got up and read a book, I was awake until 4am.

I tried sleeping from 4 - 530am and still couldn't sleep.

I was finally able to sleep a few broken hours between 530 - 9am. The sleep mask helped a lot with this.

 

3 hours ago, Shep said:

Did you use any medications for GERD or just adjust your diet? The reason I ask is this pre-dates your psychiatric drug use and some GERD drugs like the PPIs can lead to nutritional deficiencies in B12 that can present as psychiatric problems. 

 

I was on a PPI for a month, then switched to an H2 antagonist for a week, it's been pretty much under control since then. I've made all sorts of diet changes that has improved my GERD symptoms (cutting out alcohol, caffeine, spicy food, bacon). I was also taking a multivitamin everyday throughout it. I had anxiety prior to taking the PPIs.

 

3 hours ago, Shep said:

Let us know how you do with the clonazepam reduction. 

 

Last night was the first night of 0.125mg after a week at 0.25mg. I take it at 1130pm every night, a half hour before bed.

[Shep]

21 hours ago, GADboy said:

I tried 75mg of Magnesium Citrate, I think it might have been too much. A few hours later my legs started buzzing more, they've settled down a bit this morning. It could have also been from stress also, because I had an argument with my wife about something trivial, and they started buzzing right after that. I'll wait until they've settled down before I try a smaller dose of Magnesium again.

 

Stress can definitely cause upticks in symptoms, but if you do try the magnesium again, perhaps space it one or two hours away from when you take the clonazepam so it doesn't cause a paradoxical reaction. Benzos are notorious for causing paradoxical reactions, and the more you dampen down the nervous system (including with supplements), the more it fights to stay alert. 

 

22 hours ago, GADboy said:

Last night was the first night of 0.125mg after a week at 0.25mg. I take it at 1130pm every night, a half hour before bed.

 

You may want to go to bed at 10 PM and see if that improves your sleep. This is from the thread Melatonin for Sleep: 

 

On 4/6/2011 at 9:26 PM, Altostrata said:

It is important to take melatonin in accordance to the natural sleep-wake cycle, or you might train your body to a different cycle. Your adrenals also run on a sleep schedule of approximately 10 p.m. to dawn. They tend to reactivate if you stay up later, which may keep you from sleeping. If you can, get to bed by 10 p.m. and retrain your sleep cycle.

 

Please also see:

 

Tips to help sleep: so many of us have that awful withdrawal insomnia

 

What is the sleep cycle?

 

 

 

[GADboy]

Yesterday I just had a couple waves of anxiety. Once in the morning and once in the evening. The evening anxiety was about anticipating sleep.

I still feel muscle weakness in arms and pain in shoulders / trapezius. Legs are still a bit buzzy.

 

Last night I tried taking a tiny bit of melatonin. I have 3mg pills which I cut into 6 pieces and then broke the final piece off... so it's definitely less than .5mg.

I slept a little better last night, in total about 6 hours.

I fell asleep at 1145pm and woke up about 4 times in the night. I had a mild cortisol spike at 445am and I thought that I was going to be up the rest of the morning but I turned my head away from the clock for a second and next thing I knew it was 630am. The sleep mask has been helping a lot since our apartment isn't completely dark.

 

I wish I could try sleeping around 10pm but our apartment is too tiny for that so I got bed at 1130.

[Shep]

18 hours ago, GADboy said:

The evening anxiety was about anticipating sleep.

 

If you're getting anxious about not being able to sleep, you may want to bring some non-drug coping skills into the picture, especially on handling anticipatory anxiety. This is a great thread to read to figure out ways not to go down into a spiral due to these kinds of thoughts:

 

Dealing With Emotional Spirals

 

When you're dealing with anticipatory fears, it's a secondary fear -  the "what if" fears. And that's very common during withdrawal. 

 

Dr. Claire Weekes comes highly recommended for helping people learn how to manage and cope with anxiety, anticipatory anxiety,  and second fear. 

 

Dr. Claire Weekes - How To Recover From Anxiety

 

And this is a great short video on acceptance without adding "second fear":

 

Dr. Claire Weekes: How to accept the physical symptoms of nervous illness video (1.5 minutes)

 

And you can find loads more out there on YouTube by googling Dr. Claire Weekes. 

 

Dr.Claire Weekes - How to overcome Anxiety - (YouTube - 1 hour, 20 minutes)

 

This is a great article on "second fear":

 

The Anxiety Monster Feeds on Second Fear

 

The author quotes Dr. Weekes:

 

Quote

Dr. Weekes advises this: watch the fear go up and down. Ride it like a roller coaster. As long as you don’t prolong it by adding second fear, you’ll be reining it in within five minutes–the length of time it takes for adrenaline to fade–give or take.

 

Learning breathing techniques can also be helpful. Here is a good one to start off with: 

 

The Breathing Space by Jon Kabat Zinn video (4 minutes)

 

Another way to deal with "second fear" and anticipatory anxiety is to settle into a mode of acceptance, knowing that you WILL survive this, as well as building up an arsenal of non-drug coping skills that will serve you well long after withdrawal. 

 

Acceptance

 

18 hours ago, GADboy said:

Last night I tried taking a tiny bit of melatonin. I have 3mg pills which I cut into 6 pieces and then broke the final piece off... so it's definitely less than .5mg.

I slept a little better last night, in total about 6 hours.

 

This is great, GADboy. Glad you're seeing improvements. 

 

18 hours ago, GADboy said:

I wish I could try sleeping around 10pm but our apartment is too tiny for that so I got bed at 1130.

 

I can relate to the small apartment. As long as you're working the best you can within any limitations, that's all anyone can ask of you. 

 

Check out some of these links and see if any of them appeal to you. Anything you can do to bring calming to the nervous system, the faster healing will happen. 

[GADboy]

It's now been 2 weeks since I stopped Escitalopram.

 

Yesterday, I noticed another anxiety spike after lunch, it came at the same time I was feeling a little drowsy, subsided after a couple hours.

In the evening I was able to distract myself and then had an epsom salt bath before bed. So I didn't have any pre-bedtime anxiety.

I took 0.125mg of Clonazepam and 0.25mg of Melatonin at 1130pm.

I was able to sleep more than 6 hours, but still woke up 3 or 4 times, was able to fall asleep quickly again.

I think this is the first time I was able to sleep at least 6 hours two nights in a row!

No cortisol spike either, so I think the sleep mask is helping a lot with that.

 

Still my relation to sleep feels off. I can't tell when I'm going to fall asleep, I'm just lying there and next thing I know I'm waking up 90 mins later. It's very hard to describe.

 

As far as other symptoms go:

Legs still buzz

Arms still feel weak

Some GI problems, but not GERD

Skin and muscles not really burning in the same way, but shoulder/neck is sore.

 

Overall I'm feeling improvements.

 

5 hours ago, Shep said:

Dr. Claire Weekes comes highly recommended for helping people learn how to manage and cope with anxiety, anticipatory anxiety,  and second fear. 

 

I found out about her in another thread, and actually my afternoon anxiety subsided while I was listening to her talk yesterday.

She is a really powerful speaker. I can see the parallels with what she is talking about and how CBT is structured. I wonder if they derived it from her work.

[Jennings]

Hey Dude!

 

Just jumped on here to say hang in there.  I know you will get through this. 

 

I have the GERD too.  It's terrible.  I used to love spicy food.  

 

I feel you on the morning Cortisal spikes and the sleep locking.  You're way of describing the sleep with a tv in front of your eyes spot on.  I always felt it was like an old movie screen was in front of my eyes and it was playing black and white cartoons from the 50s sped up.

 

This will pass, it always does.

[GADboy]

Thanks for the kind words Jennings!

 

This past week has been much better sleep-wise. I've been getting on average 6 hours of sleep, sometimes sleeping all the way through the night. Compare that to 4 hours average the previous week.

Cortisol spikes are not so pronounced either.

 

I still get anxiety spells in the afternoon/evening, but they have been less activating and have dissipated relatively quickly.

 

I have a killer headache today, it feels like a migraine, although not the most severe that I've ever had... It's been about 5 hours now. In the past I've had a migraine once every few years, I dunno why. Hopefully this is just another one-off.

 

The past week I've been on 0.125mg of Clonazepam a night. Tonight I'm planning on dropping to 0.0625mg. I hope this won't be a bad week coming up.

[Shep]

12 hours ago, GADboy said:

I have a killer headache today, it feels like a migraine, although not the most severe that I've ever had... It's been about 5 hours now. In the past I've had a migraine once every few years, I dunno why. Hopefully this is just another one-off.

 

The past week I've been on 0.125mg of Clonazepam a night. Tonight I'm planning on dropping to 0.0625mg. I hope this won't be a bad week coming up.

 

How are you feeling, GADboy? Has the headache gotten better?

 

Headaches can be withdrawal symptoms, so please let us know how you're doing. 

[GADboy]

I cut my Clonazepan dose to 0.0625mg last night.

I went to bed as I usually do and just as I was about to fall asleep my body woke up all of a sudden.

I only managed to sleep 2 hours between 430-630 am. I woke up with a bad cortisol spike and got the chills. Couldn't get any more sleep after that.

 

I looked through my diary and the last time two times I did a reduction on the Clonazepan I also only slept 2 hours that night, but each night afterwards got better, so I'm hopeful this is a temporary setback.

 

3 hours ago, Shep said:

How are you feeling, GADboy? Has the headache gotten better?

 

The headache started around 2pm and was the worse around 430pm, it faded by 11pm. Tylenol didn't really help, I just had to suffer through it.

I kind of still feel remnants of it this morning, but that could also because I didn't sleep well.

[Shep]

How did last night go, GADboy? How are you feeling? 

[GADboy]

So far the headache was a one-off 🤞

 

Last night I slept better. It was little hard to get to sleep initially, I was feeling a burst of nervous energy, but I managed to breath through it.
I woke up three times in the night, again with my body feeling a burst of energy throughout my body.

In total I think I slept 6-7 hours, so it was one of the better nights.

[Shep]

Excellent update, GADboy. 

[getofflex]

On 11/15/2020 at 8:57 AM, GADboy said:.

 

I've never had insomnia before taking the escitalopram.

Escitalopram is a terrible drug. I’ve been weaning off for years and still have bouts of severe insomnia. Fortunately it’s getting better gradually.  

[Shep]

@GADboy How are you feeling? How is your sleep now? 

[GADboy]

Sleep has been pretty stable, I averaged 6 hours in the past week. I'm trying to go to bed earlier, but I just end up reading longer.

I wake up less during the night... maybe once or twice instead of every 90 mins. I'm also no longer waking up with cortisol spikes.

In fact, I've been keeping loose track of my heart rate and it is down significantly in the past few days: 65-75 vs 75-90 in the previous weeks.

I feel more calm in general and I am having a better time concentrating at work. I'm also starting to look forward to things as well, so it feels like a cloud is lifting.

Anxiety spells are less severe and are much shorter.

 

I hope I don't jinx it but I would say that this past Friday, I almost felt normal for one day. No anxiety, no pain, no weird sensations.

 

Last night I tapered to 0.04mg of Clonazepan, since I learned how to make a water titrate. I plan to keep going down for a few more weeks and maybe jump at 0.02mg.

 

I'm optimistic, but I'm not out of the woods yet. I'll feel more at ease when I can put the Clonazepan behind me for a few weeks.

 

I've been getting more headaches, although they are not as severe as on November 23rd.

They feel almost like caffeine withdrawal headaches, but I'm not withdrawing on caffeine.

Also, I'm always thirsty. I drink so much water and pee so much too. Sometimes my fingers are wrinkly which is weird.

[Shep]

17 hours ago, GADboy said:

Last night I tapered to 0.04mg of Clonazepan, since I learned how to make a water titrate. I plan to keep going down for a few more weeks and maybe jump at 0.02mg.

 

Great update, GADboy. Thanks for letting us know how you're doing. 

 

This sounds like a reasonable plan considering your short term use and how many improvements you're seeing. 

 

17 hours ago, GADboy said:

I've been getting more headaches, although they are not as severe as on November 23rd.

They feel almost like caffeine withdrawal headaches, but I'm not withdrawing on caffeine.

Also, I'm always thirsty. I drink so much water and pee so much too. Sometimes my fingers are wrinkly which is weird.

 

Please note that excessive thirst and peeing a lot can be a symptom of diabetes, so get yourself checked out if you feel this is more than withdrawal. Also, headaches can be a sign of too high or too low blood glucose, so if you don't feel this is resolving, especially when so many other symptoms are resolving, do check in with your doctor. 

[GADboy]

I woke up at 4am and couldn't get back to sleep, just wasn't tired anymore.

I think I feel the Clonazepan reduction, but it's nothing too bad, a little more anxiety maybe.

 

9 hours ago, Shep said:

Please note that excessive thirst and peeing a lot can be a symptom of diabetes, so get yourself checked out if you feel this is more than withdrawal.

Thanks for the heads up Shep, I'll talk to my doctor at my next followup in December. It runs in my family. I believe that I had a fasting glucose blood test a few months ago and it was normal.

 

[Shep]

 

On 12/2/2020 at 5:32 PM, GADboy said:

I woke up at 4am and couldn't get back to sleep, just wasn't tired anymore.

I think I feel the Clonazepan reduction, but it's nothing too bad, a little more anxiety maybe.

 

@GADboyhow are you doing? Are you completely off clonazepam now? 

[JesusSavemefromWD]

How are you ?

[GADboy]

Another week of improvements. I'm feeling some sense of normality returning.

 

11 hours ago, Shep said:

Are you completely off clonazepam now?

 

Not yet, I decided to try another week at 0.04mg and then another two weeks at 0.02mg before I jump off.

 

I've been pretty headache-y these days, nothing as bad as Nov 23rd. However I noticed that it gets worse when I go outside.

I think it could possibly be from the quick clonazepam taper, which is why I'm going to slow it down for a couple more weeks.

Also this week I had some really weird pain in my left leg. Every day a completely different part of the leg hurts, sometimes is a muscle, sometimes a ligament, sometimes a joint. It's completely random.

 

On 12/8/2020 at 2:56 AM, JesusSavemefromWD said:

Have you had any depersonalization/deattachment from reality?

 

The only time I had felt derealization was when I had a nocturnal panic attack, but this was before I took any antidepressants. It was really scary because I didn't understand if I was alive or dead or dying or still asleep.

[Shep]

9 hours ago, GADboy said:

Not yet, I decided to try another week at 0.04mg and then another two weeks at 0.02mg before I jump off.

 

I've been pretty headache-y these days, nothing as bad as Nov 23rd. However I noticed that it gets worse when I go outside.

I think it could possibly be from the quick clonazepam taper, which is why I'm going to slow it down for a couple more weeks.

Also this week I had some really weird pain in my left leg. Every day a completely different part of the leg hurts, sometimes is a muscle, sometimes a ligament, sometimes a joint. It's completely random.

 

Does your headache get any better or any worse within 30 minutes of taking the benzo? 

 

For the leg pain, you may want to try some gentle stretches. Benzos are powerful muscle relaxers, so the more you can gently stretch during your taper, the better. Please see:

 

Non-drug techniques for dealing with body pain

 

If you can tolerate magnesium, a warm epsom salt bath can also be very effective in helping muscle and joint pain. 

 

 

On 12/1/2020 at 2:50 PM, GADboy said:

Also, I'm always thirsty. I drink so much water and pee so much too. Sometimes my fingers are wrinkly which is weird.

 

 

Have these symptoms gotten better? Please remember to follow up with your doctor this month about getting checked for diabetes. Just to be safe. 

 

 

9 hours ago, GADboy said:

Another week of improvements. I'm feeling some sense of normality returning.

 

This is great to read. And I admire the way you're carefully assessing your symptoms and holding longer and tapering slower to accommodate your symptoms. That's the way to do it. 

[getofflex]

@ GADboy I'm really glad to hear that you are seeing improvements.  Good for you for tapering to a tiny dose before you jump off.  Jennifer 

[StarShopping87]

Hey! Are you still around? Just wanted to see how you are doing these days? Hope all is well