RickyIsHealing: mirtazapine withdrawal

[RickyIsHealing]

yes i agree , i feel like the initial phase of the " 2 weeks taking them to let them get into your system " is the 2 weeks that ***** you up the most.

its just baffles me how i have  took them for such a short time and how unlike myself and saf and anxious i get , i was the happiest bubbly hyper active funny loving caring person you could ever meet before all of this , i hope to get him back someday ! 

until then i guess i just have to feel like a shell of what i used to be ! 

sorry if it sounds negative I'm just being honest 

wish we could all get together and go through it at the same time , feel like wee could all support each other on a BAD days !

i know you cant say but i read that its gets mainly better after 90 days of being med free ? would you think the same or have heard the same? 

how are you today by the way?

x
 

Edited December 14, 2020 by ChessieCat
changed swear word to asterisks

[JesusSavemefromWD]

I cannot ( and don’t think anyone can) predict how long recovery will take. It depends on the drugs used, time in the drug, genetic background of the individual, what WD symptoms have emerged, age , even sex (male or female). There are some statistics out there with most people having noticeable improvement after 6 weeks and some others as long as six months. But as u can see in this forum , AD victims testify years of slow recovery.... There is literature supporting even permanent SSRI/SNRI side effects but from what I have read this is mainly referred to movement related side effects like developing dystonia, and sexual dysfunction, although even that can be resolved after years. 
There is nothing published on SSRI induced DP that i am suffering. It is clearly stated as rare AD side effect but no info or statistics on how long till recovery. In my case, I had many physiological symptoms during tapering and following tapering (non stop anxiety, unreasonable inner fear and tremor, derealization, depersonalization, completely out of my body experiences, soul despair and a death like feeling, no appetite at all, insomnia or vivid nightmares when I would manage to sleep, horrific crazy thoughts like that someone will just show up from nowhere and kill my loved ones), and minor physical symptoms (face and arms numbing, smg crawling inside my head, red eye blood vessels, eye floaters and difficulty focusing -like one eye was focusing on different level then the other, sweating - I never used to sweat even when in the gym!-, tinnitus, headaches, lip twitching). Note I never had these symptoms before in my life NEVER!! 
All symptoms have subsided now for me 7 weeks Off the drug EXCEPT depersonalization and red eye blood vessels.... DP is the worst and I don’t think I see much of an improvement and that scares me .... no one can live having no sense of them self’s.....

Do u see improvement in your symptoms?

[RickyIsHealing]

anybody ever tried smoking CBD flower ? 

[RickyIsHealing]

I honestly feel like half the things I feel I make stronger myself by the way I think?

 

I think if I could be hypnotised to forget everything about this situation I would recover ! 

 

Aint had a too bad day today , fell abit low around 5 6pm , had a weak sleep last might also so that never helps ! 

 

I have had toothache all day too so thats a bummer ! 

 

God bless all 

 

X

[RickyIsHealing]

hello guys back again.

fell asleep around 12pm last night and woke up at 4.am then broken light sleep after that ( basically no sleep after that ).

last 2 days my mood has sunk really low again and have that "this just ain't going to end " feeling.

slowly getting really fed up that I'm having to fight so much now.
so bored and tired of feeling this way

thought i would have made more progress by now , guess I'm in this for a year or 2 rather than the month or 2 i was planning for ! urghhh

god bless all ! 

[RickyIsHealing]

hey guys .

would it be risky to take paracetamol for tooth pain , i have a abyss coming i think ? and I've heard anti-biotics can set you back?

if so - as in what way?  only physical thing i suffer with currently is sleeping mine is literally all mental currently as in

depressed mood MAINLY 
anxiety spells 
no joy 

this tooth ache is PAINFULL ! X

GODBLESS 

[RickyIsHealing]

anyone have any experience with inner restlessness and if it subsides ? 

[manymoretodays]

Hi Ricky,

Painkillers in withdrawal: aspirin, ibuprofen, pareacetamol, acetaminophen, naproxen, codeine

 

As far as the inner restlessness goes and if it subsides.......mine sure did.

 

Akathesia vs restlessness, anxiety, agitation

And I'm seeing some links in the first post there on coping, and also to recoveries there.

 

So.....you are not alone in what you are dealing with anyway.......small consolation.

On 12/16/2020 at 7:00 AM, RickyIsHealing said:

if so - as in what way?  only physical thing i suffer with currently is sleeping mine is literally all mental currently as in

depressed mood MAINLY 
anxiety spells 
no joy 

this tooth ache is PAINFULL ! X

 

If I were you, I think I would check with a dentist.

 

To find topics, or subjects that you have questions about......just use your main browser and put survivingantidepressents.org in your search category, along with the topic.  That way you may not have to wait as long until someone responds to you, member or moderator.

And I may not have gotten to all your recent concerns.

 

Best, L, P, H, and G,

mmt

[Ripley]

Hi @RickyIsHealing

 

I've read that fluoroquinolone antibiotics are best avoided. I think these are fluoride based and tend to end in 'floxacin', eg levofloxacin. I think alternatives like amoxicillin are considered ok. You can search for these terms on the site and have a check. I don't have direct experience myself, it's just something I made a mental note of when I saw it! 

 

People have also mentioned requesting a non-adrenalin based numbing agent at the dentist. And I think if you ever need a general anaesthetic you can ask for one without a stimulant. I think these things can make WD symptoms worse and I imagine that includes insomnia and mental distress.

 

I would add to avoid any alcohol over xmas too but I'm sure you know that! Who needs setbacks?!

 

Best wishes

Ripley

[RickyIsHealing]

hello all , aint been on for a few days , hope everyone is ok ? 

had a ok 3 4 days feel like I've made some progress , but yesterday and today my mood has dropped again? 

maybe i was in a window ?

but don't feel as bad as i did before when my mood dropped.

sleeping better and anxiety has gotten better 

hoping it was a window and now I'm in a wave.

think it may be that non linear healing that i heard about?

GAOD BLESS ALL ! X

 

[manymoretodays]

That's great Ricky!

And yes, exactly how it goes, the non-linear healing.

And best.  L, P, H, and G,

mmt

[RickyIsHealing]

@manymoretodays so would you say its right i feel of a low mood again all of a sudden ? 

[RickyIsHealing]

@Gridley hello i hope your well , i have a question..

the last 2 3 days i have almost felt myself and not very low like and anxiety had almost gone basically , but the past 2 days i feel like I'm back with a low mood ? is this normal with the WD? , i know it probably is but I'm just looking for some reassurance and a opinion as i thought i was making progress , kind of a horrible feeling to go back down again

[Gridley]

27 minutes ago, RickyIsHealing said:

is this normal with the WD? , i know it probably is but I'm just looking for some reassurance and a opinion as i thought i was making progress , kind of a horrible feeling to go back down again

Yes, this is the entirely normal waves and windows aspect of healing.  I know it is discouraging after a window (when you think, maybe I'm healed, maybe it's over) to hit a wave, but I can assure you this is entirely normal and is a sign of healing.  You are definitely making progress and though it may go more slowly than you would like (or any of us would like), you are on the road to healing.  Be patient and accept the ups and downs--that's the way healing works.  Acceptance is a very important part of the process.

[RickyIsHealing]

thankyou gridly i was scared when i dropped that i wont heal and will be feeling low for ever , horrible to fee good then bad L*

[RickyIsHealing]

hey guys , just a quick question ..

i feel SO stressed , would that be my emotions trying to balalnced , like i feel so stressed i can feel it liek burning inside me , over nothing jsut feel flat stressed ?

[RickyIsHealing]

Got some serious abdominal cramping it feels like ? hope this wave goes away soon  

[RickyIsHealing]

sorry for such a sad post , i just had to leave my partner and kids at my partners sisters , i feel so down i cant stop crying , i have no appetite and i feel so weak and dizzy. 

need a break from all of this , i feel every emotion except happy.

pfshhhh 

as if a month worth of tablets have destroyed my life.

[mva96]

Hey Ricky, 

 

I'm right there with you. Have been crying a lot today and feel awful. Neither of our lives are over. We just need to take this ugly process one day at a time and have faith that we will recover. Take care

[RickyIsHealing]

Yeah I guess , its just how much longer and how worse can it get 😞

[manymoretodays]

Hi RickyIsHealing,

13 hours ago, RickyIsHealing said:

orry for such a sad post , i just had to leave my partner and kids at my partners sisters , i feel so down i cant stop crying , i have no appetite and i feel so weak and dizzy. 

 

And it's just one event.  It does sound awful and tough though.  Hopefully a Window, or improvement real soon. 

I love your user name, and so......that's a good sign.

 

I don't know if you are ruminating now, but this may be helpful:

Dealing with Emotional Spirals

and "Change the channel"- dealing with cognitive symptoms

 

And then sometimes, a good old cry is just what is needed, and maybe is a bit healing in itself.

 

And eat, even when no appetite, just graze a bit.

 

Best, L, P, H, and G,

mmt

[RickyIsHealing]

Thankyou , my partner had a bug last week and she thinks that I may have it and that it's knocking me down and around ..enless its a new wave of symptoms ..I've only really had mental ones except sleep ( insomina ) being physical I guess.

 

Currently feel :

really weak 

 

Jittery 

 

Very tripped out feeling 

 

super low mood ( was crying for a while yesterday I felt hopless and defeated ) 

 

Tired of trying 

 

Hungry with no appetite 

 

Restless 

 

Lethargic 

 

Feeling no emotions ( except sadness obvusly) 

 

I wasent like this last week I thought I was making progress .

 

I don't want to ring drs because they will just give me tablets and as we all know ow that don't work ! 

 

God help me and us all 🙏 

 

[RickyIsHealing]

hey guys , last few days and today have been dreadful , ive found myself crying from hopelessness and despair that i will never feel right again.

there's only so much someone cant take right ? 

i do try and tell myself that this withdrawals but how am i really to know it is ? , 

i constantly think that I'm really badly depressed and this cant be withdrawal , I'm SOO scared that it is depression because the only way out is with meds and they just don't work so i feel like i will feel this way for ever , yesterday and this morning have been my most darkest days yet , horrible intrusive thoughts of you know what  

my partner thinks i may have a bug as all of a sudden i  feel weak and have no appetite , i thought i was making progress , i even manged to take my son to get his hair cut the other week and felt good about that , then all of a sudden i feel like i been thrown into a hole or darkness , hopelessness and its intolerable.

what if it is bad depression and i just think its the withdrawals and I'm leaving it untreated and it will get worse?  i mean i only had tablets for around 7 weeks , my partner thinks i should not be feeling anything to do with withdrawal anymore , i just don't know , i feel so lost and not myself , i cant remember the last time i felt happy and genuinely smiled and laughed.

what options do i have IF i am depressed and i refuse to take tablets even thoe they could make me better ? 

the other week i actually thought i was getting better and making progress , this week i feel like i have made zero progress and i am worse than before..

where's my life gone man , where have i gone? 



god help me !   

[RickyIsHealing]

so i think i have inner akathisia , I've read propranolol can help relive it ? does anyone have any experience and is there withdrawals off propanol ? 

[RickyIsHealing]

is this normal to feel scared of things i shouldn't be scared about , like going to the shop ? 

about taking a shower or eating food , its like I'm nervous to do anything , my anxiety is just there 24-7

i get anxious about returning to work and things i probably would be anxious about normally ( but to a higher level ) but i have a crippling anxiety feeling 25-7 

maybe its my cns just all over the place , is cns to do with nervousness and anxiety ? 

[JesusSavemefromWD]

Hi,

I had that unreasonable fear too while on Zoloft and during tapering; I was scared when I couldnt find the TV control, when the box of milk was empty 😳, when my husband would call my name, when I had to stop to a red traffic light , when someone would approach me to ask me a question, when my two boys had a simple argument, when I had to wait in line, all kinds of unreasonable fears. It has subsided, almost gone now, 65 days OFF Zoloft. I remember what helped me when having those fears was a sentence from a meditation.... “from now and on your brain will use the feelings of fear and terror when there is a real danger, if no danger those feelings ARE NO NEEDED”

[RickyIsHealing]

i hope I'm just not thinking right , but i find it impossible to recover from what i have ? its like inner akathisia ? will this go away , anyone had any experience with this ? 

i need hope 

[AdviceNeeded]

I had something that could be described as inner akasthesia when I up-dosed to 15 mg mirt back in October. It lasted about 2 weeks. I know our circumstances are different but it did pass, from what I’ve read in the vast majority of cases it does.

[RickyIsHealing]

Thing is , I've been of meds for just jnder 2 months now ? 

[JesusSavemefromWD]

On 12/26/2020 at 11:36 AM, RickyIsHealing said:

hey guys , last few days and today have been dreadful , ive found myself crying from hopelessness and despair that i will never feel right again.

there's only so much someone cant take right ? 

i do try and tell myself that this withdrawals but how am i really to know it is ? , 

i constantly think that I'm really badly depressed and this cant be withdrawal , I'm SOO scared that it is depression because the only way out is with meds and they just don't work so i feel like i will feel this way for ever , yesterday and this morning have been my most darkest days yet , horrible intrusive thoughts of you know what  

my partner thinks i may have a bug as all of a sudden i  feel weak and have no appetite , i thought i was making progress , i even manged to take my son to get his hair cut the other week and felt good about that , then all of a sudden i feel like i been thrown into a hole or darkness , hopelessness and its intolerable.

what if it is bad depression and i just think its the withdrawals and I'm leaving it untreated and it will get worse?  i mean i only had tablets for around 7 weeks , my partner thinks i should not be feeling anything to do with withdrawal anymore , i just don't know , i feel so lost and not myself , i cant remember the last time i felt happy and genuinely smiled and laughed.

what options do i have IF i am depressed and i refuse to take tablets even thoe they could make me better ? 

the other week i actually thought i was getting better and making progress , this week i feel like i have made zero progress and i am worse than before..

where's my life gone man , where have i gone? 



god help me !   

Hi , in my opinion one way to get an idea of your symptoms are WD or not, is to think if you had them before taking the drugs. For example I have tinnitus and depersonalization during and after Zoloft but didn’t have them before, so it’s probably WD. Stay strong, I know it’s a torture. 

[RickyIsHealing]

hey all !

not posted in a while , think i may have been in a 10 day window , went to sleep the other night and when i woke up i felt the horribleness come back , low mood and not as serve but the anxiety and pointless nerves are back , hoping it all subsides again soon .

thought i was over this , felt like i was never ill for 10 days , was like 99 percent back to myself , how disheartening.

im guessing i have now been put into a wave ? 

thanks all.  

[Santino]

29 minutes ago, RickyIsHealing said:

hey all !

not posted in a while , think i may have been in a 10 day window , went to sleep the other night and when i woke up i felt the horribleness come back , low mood and not as serve but the anxiety and pointless nerves are back , hoping it all subsides again soon .

thought i was over this , felt like i was never ill for 10 days , was like 99 percent back to myself , how disheartening.

im guessing i have now been put into a wave ? 

thanks all.  

Hi Ricky

The fact that you had 10 good days shows that you are on a good way to recover. Do not overstrain your mind. I believe from now on your windows will become longer and longer and the waves will become shorter. On your bad days just push forward my friend and keep the course.... 

You are doing great,

[RickyIsHealing]

20 minutes ago, Santino said:

Hi Ricky

The fact that you had 10 good days shows that you are on a good way to recover. Do not overstrain your mind. I believe from now on your windows will become longer and longer and the waves will become shorter. On your bad days just push forward my friend and keep the course.... 

You are doing great,

thankyou Santino

 I am trying to keep reminding myself this is a wave I'm in and i will feel better again shortly , hopefully the wave don't last 10 days thoe ! 

its very daunting knowing that a few days ago I felt fine and now i am back here m not as serve i may add but its still come back and is discouraging and  heart breaking ! 

keep going forward i guess ! 

[RickyIsHealing]

hey all , hope everyone is a little bit better today !

still feeling anxious and nervous over nothing . 

I think it stems from worrying and wondering if ill ever get back to my "normal" self and how i use to feel ?.

anxiety and nerves are a tiny bit lower today but my mood has gone south a lot , trying to stay strong and remember then ten day window i had in hope i will have a longer one soon.

must stay strong , must get through ! 

can  i get some support of anyone , could really do with some  

[RickyIsHealing]

hello guys , kinda feel tired from feeling tired of it all now if you understand ? feeling fed up  

everyday is a fight and to think last week i was feeling so much better than this ! 

so much better in general , i even got my haircut in a actual barbers !

wish i could bee hit with a date all this would be over by so i knew what i was fighting towards !

sorry to ramble , hope your all ok 

current symptoms if anyone is intrested 

low mood
fed up
tired 
no energy
feeling disconnected 
feeling just crazy and strange in general 
OCD behaviour (not very strong but strong enough to be horribly annoying) 

just want to be ok now , how much longer  
 

[JesusSavemefromWD]

I hear you, I feel you, I am in this torture with you and we will both get out of it one day..... I wish I knew how much longer as well.... I take it day by day, thinking maybe tomorrow is the day I ll turn the corner. Praying and praying because no doctor can save us, only God...,,