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Manati: Effexor-withdrawal - in need of help, please!


Manati

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Hi Manymoretodays, Altostrata, and anyone who cares 💗

 

So, I went ahead and took 3 beads (approx. 1mg) of Venlafaxine today. So far, I haven't had an immediate reaction to it. My day was tough but not worse than yesterday. I was mainly in a sad, anxious and hopeless mood, and had feelings of tension in my head. Those tense 'cold' headaches were present before reinstating the Venlafaxine though. Now I'm going to observe if there will be any changes during the night.

 

My day so far:

1:53am took 400mg magnesium, lights off. Sound in my ears and head feeling tense/hot. Fell asleep.

3:50am woke up anxious but could go straight back to a light sleep

5:14am woke up anxious, posted on here

6:45am woke up anxious

7:29am woke up anxious

8:30am woke up for good, feeling anxious, sad and hopeless.

8:00am - noon overall anxious, hopeless, 'weepy', sad feeling persisted.

10am: Took 3 beads of Venlafaxine, which should equal about 1mg (one bead should contain 0.3/0.4mg)

11:35am feeling slightly agitated, but too dramatic

12:00pm - 14:00pm walked with my dog, feeling a bit more neutral. Tense 'cold' feeling in my head/face

14:00pm - 15:00pm tried to nap, feeling flat, empty, hopeless - this feeling consisted until around 18:00pm

18:00pm-20:00pm increased feeling of anxiety

20:00pm  - 21:30pm feeling more quiet, neutral. Hoping for my late 'evening window' of feeling relatively calm and better.

 

If 0.8mg of Venlafaxine really make the difference between a night of sheer horror and relative relief, I'm really wondering how it will ever be possible to quit it? Won't the anxiety attacks come back as soon as I jump off even such low a dose? Is anyone reading this who has successfully tapered off Venlafaxine after reinstating a microdose?

Also - with a last dose of Venlafaxine being around 33mg, I wonder what dosage I should aim for in order to stabilize? I know it always depends on the individual, but I didn't find a 'rule of thumb' for that in the reinstatement guide - I only read that it is usually not necessary to 'updose' to the original dose? Is there a 'typical' percentage of the original dose that provides stabilization?

 

Thanks for your help, input or support of any kind!

 

 

Fluoxetine (Prozac) (25mg?) from December 2002 - November 2005 for anxiety/depression

Effexor (Venlafaxine) Retard (75mg) due to Panic attacks from November 2005 until around May 2020 when I started tapering off from 75mg to about 33mg in September. Accidentially missed a dose and naively went cold turkey from around 33mg to zero on 26th of September. Hell broke loose in early December.

25th December: Reinstated Venlafaxine with one bead (0.3/0.4mg) in the evening, proceeding with two beads (0.7/0.8mg)

since 5th January: 3 beads of Venlafaxine daily and nothing else except fish oil and magnesium. No changes in daily routine

15th January - 17th January: 4 beads of Venlafaxine

since 18th January: back to 3 beads of Venlafaxine due to extreme agitation, introduced Ashwaghanda supplement.

Since 23. January: introduced Lyrica to help with sleep/jerks keeping me awake: updosed from 4mg to 8mg.

Since February: 700mg Valerian and 2mg Melatonin for sleep

March: tapering Lyrica again due to side effects.

April: down to 2 beads of Venlafaxine

17th October: Off everything. Braindead, apathetic/anhedonic Zombie.

 

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  • Administrator

Perhaps a little more will be the answer. We don't know.

 

Reinstatement can be tricky because often going on and off psychiatric drugs, having adverse effects and withdrawal, causes the nervous system to become sensitized. Even a small dose may cause an adverse reaction.

 

Please let us know how you're doing.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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1 hour ago, Altostrata said:

Perhaps a little more will be the answer. We don't know.

 

Reinstatement can be tricky because often going on and off psychiatric drugs, having adverse effects and withdrawal, causes the nervous system to become sensitized. Even a small dose may cause an adverse reaction.

 

Please let us know how you're doing.

 

Thank you Altostrata! 💗

I was going by 'gut feeling' - my nightly anxiety attacks have flattened pretty much immediately since reinstating, and apart from the intense feelings of agitation a few days after, I couldn't identify any adverse reaction. Still have sound in my ear, tense headaches and anxiety, but not any worse than before.

I'm hoping the best for the night and will keep you updated.

Fluoxetine (Prozac) (25mg?) from December 2002 - November 2005 for anxiety/depression

Effexor (Venlafaxine) Retard (75mg) due to Panic attacks from November 2005 until around May 2020 when I started tapering off from 75mg to about 33mg in September. Accidentially missed a dose and naively went cold turkey from around 33mg to zero on 26th of September. Hell broke loose in early December.

25th December: Reinstated Venlafaxine with one bead (0.3/0.4mg) in the evening, proceeding with two beads (0.7/0.8mg)

since 5th January: 3 beads of Venlafaxine daily and nothing else except fish oil and magnesium. No changes in daily routine

15th January - 17th January: 4 beads of Venlafaxine

since 18th January: back to 3 beads of Venlafaxine due to extreme agitation, introduced Ashwaghanda supplement.

Since 23. January: introduced Lyrica to help with sleep/jerks keeping me awake: updosed from 4mg to 8mg.

Since February: 700mg Valerian and 2mg Melatonin for sleep

March: tapering Lyrica again due to side effects.

April: down to 2 beads of Venlafaxine

17th October: Off everything. Braindead, apathetic/anhedonic Zombie.

 

Link to comment

..ok it it almost 7am now here and the night has been terrible.

I was really tired when switching off the lights around 2am, but couldn't sleep. Strong feeling of tension on the top of my head, and the noise in my ear became piercing. My legs were cramping/shaking!

At around 4am I couldn't bear it any longer and went for a 45minute fast walk in the dark. Coming back at around 5am I managed to go to sleep for about an hour, then woken with anxiety, agitation, my legs cramping.

I wonder if it's from updosing that one bead?? So I'm going to stay at 2 beads then for longer, I suppose? I'm feeling really hopeless right now!!!

It seems my mind is sort of numbed by the Venlafaxine (which I'm grateful for!), but my body is going crazy!

Thanks for any help!

 

Fluoxetine (Prozac) (25mg?) from December 2002 - November 2005 for anxiety/depression

Effexor (Venlafaxine) Retard (75mg) due to Panic attacks from November 2005 until around May 2020 when I started tapering off from 75mg to about 33mg in September. Accidentially missed a dose and naively went cold turkey from around 33mg to zero on 26th of September. Hell broke loose in early December.

25th December: Reinstated Venlafaxine with one bead (0.3/0.4mg) in the evening, proceeding with two beads (0.7/0.8mg)

since 5th January: 3 beads of Venlafaxine daily and nothing else except fish oil and magnesium. No changes in daily routine

15th January - 17th January: 4 beads of Venlafaxine

since 18th January: back to 3 beads of Venlafaxine due to extreme agitation, introduced Ashwaghanda supplement.

Since 23. January: introduced Lyrica to help with sleep/jerks keeping me awake: updosed from 4mg to 8mg.

Since February: 700mg Valerian and 2mg Melatonin for sleep

March: tapering Lyrica again due to side effects.

April: down to 2 beads of Venlafaxine

17th October: Off everything. Braindead, apathetic/anhedonic Zombie.

 

Link to comment

Hang in there @Manati. Try the Michael Sealey guided sleep meditations. They bring me relief when nothing else will. Find the perfect low volume in you headphones so if you fall asleep his voice doesn’t wake you back up. 

 

 

1998 -2000 started and stopped several SSRIs because of bad reactions, Zoloft, Paxil, Wellbutrin
2004 to 2006 Prozac 20mg

2004  Klonepin(daily 15 days)VERY bad cold turkey reaction after 15 days of use. 
2012, rehab inpatient alcohol, marijuana (sober since)

2012- present trazadone 50mg (At bedtime) tried twice to stop. 
2012-2017 Prozac 20mg, stopped Prozac CT without many problems. 

12/16/20- present lexapro 10 mg

12/27/20 started rapid lexapro taper 2.5mg every 2 days after only 11 days of use. Drug interaction problems with  trazadone suspected. 
1/2/21 last day of lexapro
1/321 now trying to stabilize on trazadone enough to begin taper. I was not using the trazadone in a consistent  way starting in late October and it thru me into wd  like symptoms. I was taking it at wildly different times each day because my sleep schedule (bed time) would fluctuate. 

 

Link to comment
2 minutes ago, Humanist56 said:

Hang in there @Manati. Try the Michael Sealey guided sleep meditations. They bring me relief when nothing else will. Find the perfect low volume in you headphones so if you fall asleep his voice doesn’t wake you back up. 

 

 

 Thank you so much, Humanist, for you help!! I will try in out. I'm feeling really desperate at this point!

Fluoxetine (Prozac) (25mg?) from December 2002 - November 2005 for anxiety/depression

Effexor (Venlafaxine) Retard (75mg) due to Panic attacks from November 2005 until around May 2020 when I started tapering off from 75mg to about 33mg in September. Accidentially missed a dose and naively went cold turkey from around 33mg to zero on 26th of September. Hell broke loose in early December.

25th December: Reinstated Venlafaxine with one bead (0.3/0.4mg) in the evening, proceeding with two beads (0.7/0.8mg)

since 5th January: 3 beads of Venlafaxine daily and nothing else except fish oil and magnesium. No changes in daily routine

15th January - 17th January: 4 beads of Venlafaxine

since 18th January: back to 3 beads of Venlafaxine due to extreme agitation, introduced Ashwaghanda supplement.

Since 23. January: introduced Lyrica to help with sleep/jerks keeping me awake: updosed from 4mg to 8mg.

Since February: 700mg Valerian and 2mg Melatonin for sleep

March: tapering Lyrica again due to side effects.

April: down to 2 beads of Venlafaxine

17th October: Off everything. Braindead, apathetic/anhedonic Zombie.

 

Link to comment

His meditations are not work, they are soothing and very hypnotic. Sometimes they take 10 minutes sometimes they take an hour but try it. I hope you find relief tonight. What do you have to lose? 
 

I wish you peace right now. 
 

goodnight  

1998 -2000 started and stopped several SSRIs because of bad reactions, Zoloft, Paxil, Wellbutrin
2004 to 2006 Prozac 20mg

2004  Klonepin(daily 15 days)VERY bad cold turkey reaction after 15 days of use. 
2012, rehab inpatient alcohol, marijuana (sober since)

2012- present trazadone 50mg (At bedtime) tried twice to stop. 
2012-2017 Prozac 20mg, stopped Prozac CT without many problems. 

12/16/20- present lexapro 10 mg

12/27/20 started rapid lexapro taper 2.5mg every 2 days after only 11 days of use. Drug interaction problems with  trazadone suspected. 
1/2/21 last day of lexapro
1/321 now trying to stabilize on trazadone enough to begin taper. I was not using the trazadone in a consistent  way starting in late October and it thru me into wd  like symptoms. I was taking it at wildly different times each day because my sleep schedule (bed time) would fluctuate. 

 

Link to comment
50 minutes ago, Humanist56 said:

His meditations are not work, they are soothing and very hypnotic. Sometimes they take 10 minutes sometimes they take an hour but try it. I hope you find relief tonight. What do you have to lose? 
 

I wish you peace right now. 
 

goodnight  

 

Thank you Humanist, for your words and help!! 💗 I'll try it out, anything that might help at this point. I've started the video and do like it so far - I hope it can somehow combat the cortisol/stress in my body....

Have a peaceful night yourself, and thank you again!!

Fluoxetine (Prozac) (25mg?) from December 2002 - November 2005 for anxiety/depression

Effexor (Venlafaxine) Retard (75mg) due to Panic attacks from November 2005 until around May 2020 when I started tapering off from 75mg to about 33mg in September. Accidentially missed a dose and naively went cold turkey from around 33mg to zero on 26th of September. Hell broke loose in early December.

25th December: Reinstated Venlafaxine with one bead (0.3/0.4mg) in the evening, proceeding with two beads (0.7/0.8mg)

since 5th January: 3 beads of Venlafaxine daily and nothing else except fish oil and magnesium. No changes in daily routine

15th January - 17th January: 4 beads of Venlafaxine

since 18th January: back to 3 beads of Venlafaxine due to extreme agitation, introduced Ashwaghanda supplement.

Since 23. January: introduced Lyrica to help with sleep/jerks keeping me awake: updosed from 4mg to 8mg.

Since February: 700mg Valerian and 2mg Melatonin for sleep

March: tapering Lyrica again due to side effects.

April: down to 2 beads of Venlafaxine

17th October: Off everything. Braindead, apathetic/anhedonic Zombie.

 

Link to comment

So, this past night has been utter horror. Only about 1 hour sleep and my legs cramping all the time, my mind going crazy. I took 1/4 diazepam around 11am to ease my anxiety - I always regarded that as a last resort and haven't done so before. I don't want to introduce that particular drug to the story as I know how harmful it is in the long run. However, just now I didn't see another option to ease that terrible state.

I don't know if that sleepless night/ legs cramping were due to the one additional bead of Venlafaxine that I introduced yesterday? I guess I should stay with 2 beads instead of 3 for now.

I'm clueless of how to deal with the situation in the long run - I couldn't function like this!! I wonder where the updosing is going, if I can't literally updose without such symptoms? Yet without the Venlafaxine microdose, the nightly anxiety cramps were even worse!!

Would introducing Lyrica/Pregabalin to the situation be an option? I know it's never advised to mix in new drugs to the sensitive nervous system, but I really need something to help calm me down during the day and sleep at night!!

 

Thanks for your input, care and any help.

 

PS. gonna listen to the Michael Sealy meditation now, Humanist!

Fluoxetine (Prozac) (25mg?) from December 2002 - November 2005 for anxiety/depression

Effexor (Venlafaxine) Retard (75mg) due to Panic attacks from November 2005 until around May 2020 when I started tapering off from 75mg to about 33mg in September. Accidentially missed a dose and naively went cold turkey from around 33mg to zero on 26th of September. Hell broke loose in early December.

25th December: Reinstated Venlafaxine with one bead (0.3/0.4mg) in the evening, proceeding with two beads (0.7/0.8mg)

since 5th January: 3 beads of Venlafaxine daily and nothing else except fish oil and magnesium. No changes in daily routine

15th January - 17th January: 4 beads of Venlafaxine

since 18th January: back to 3 beads of Venlafaxine due to extreme agitation, introduced Ashwaghanda supplement.

Since 23. January: introduced Lyrica to help with sleep/jerks keeping me awake: updosed from 4mg to 8mg.

Since February: 700mg Valerian and 2mg Melatonin for sleep

March: tapering Lyrica again due to side effects.

April: down to 2 beads of Venlafaxine

17th October: Off everything. Braindead, apathetic/anhedonic Zombie.

 

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..and here my day:

 

22pm: took my omega 3 fish oil 1400mg

0pm: took 400mg magnesium

2am - 4am: switched lights off, really tired but couldn't sleep. Tense 'cold' headache, piercing sound in my ear and uncontrollable cramping/shaking of my legs!! It was torturous really.

4am went for a 45 minute quick walk in the cold

5am - 6am could sleep!

6am woke up with anxiety, agitated and with my legs uncontrollably cramping.

6.21am-7.39am tried to go back to sleep but couldnt due to headache, anxiety and cramping. Also, loud piercing sound in my ear.

8.33am woke up after about 50 minutes sleep

10am took 1/4 Diazepam - desperate measure to ease anxiety

12pm took my 2 beads of Venlafaxine

13pm - 14pm managed to sleep a little

16pm-18pm went for a walk

8pm took half a tablet (12mg) pregalabin (Lyrica) -

22pm omega 3 fish oil

 

Ok so I took 1/4 Diazepam in the morning to ease anxiety and also half a capsule of pregalabin in the evening. I know it wasn't sensible to introduce so much new chemistry to my system, but I am just so desperate for things to change - another night of cramping and no sleep would really be too much!

 

Thanks for all sorts of input!

 

 

 

Fluoxetine (Prozac) (25mg?) from December 2002 - November 2005 for anxiety/depression

Effexor (Venlafaxine) Retard (75mg) due to Panic attacks from November 2005 until around May 2020 when I started tapering off from 75mg to about 33mg in September. Accidentially missed a dose and naively went cold turkey from around 33mg to zero on 26th of September. Hell broke loose in early December.

25th December: Reinstated Venlafaxine with one bead (0.3/0.4mg) in the evening, proceeding with two beads (0.7/0.8mg)

since 5th January: 3 beads of Venlafaxine daily and nothing else except fish oil and magnesium. No changes in daily routine

15th January - 17th January: 4 beads of Venlafaxine

since 18th January: back to 3 beads of Venlafaxine due to extreme agitation, introduced Ashwaghanda supplement.

Since 23. January: introduced Lyrica to help with sleep/jerks keeping me awake: updosed from 4mg to 8mg.

Since February: 700mg Valerian and 2mg Melatonin for sleep

March: tapering Lyrica again due to side effects.

April: down to 2 beads of Venlafaxine

17th October: Off everything. Braindead, apathetic/anhedonic Zombie.

 

Link to comment

Hang in there, hope you’re doing a little better. 

1998 -2000 started and stopped several SSRIs because of bad reactions, Zoloft, Paxil, Wellbutrin
2004 to 2006 Prozac 20mg

2004  Klonepin(daily 15 days)VERY bad cold turkey reaction after 15 days of use. 
2012, rehab inpatient alcohol, marijuana (sober since)

2012- present trazadone 50mg (At bedtime) tried twice to stop. 
2012-2017 Prozac 20mg, stopped Prozac CT without many problems. 

12/16/20- present lexapro 10 mg

12/27/20 started rapid lexapro taper 2.5mg every 2 days after only 11 days of use. Drug interaction problems with  trazadone suspected. 
1/2/21 last day of lexapro
1/321 now trying to stabilize on trazadone enough to begin taper. I was not using the trazadone in a consistent  way starting in late October and it thru me into wd  like symptoms. I was taking it at wildly different times each day because my sleep schedule (bed time) would fluctuate. 

 

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Humanist my dear friend 💗 Thank you so much for your kind wishes!

I just woke up feeling dreadful, but I did find some sleep after yesterday's nightmare. I'll try to go back to sleep now, maybe with help from Michael Sealy.

I hope you are doing alright yourself!?

Thank you!

Fluoxetine (Prozac) (25mg?) from December 2002 - November 2005 for anxiety/depression

Effexor (Venlafaxine) Retard (75mg) due to Panic attacks from November 2005 until around May 2020 when I started tapering off from 75mg to about 33mg in September. Accidentially missed a dose and naively went cold turkey from around 33mg to zero on 26th of September. Hell broke loose in early December.

25th December: Reinstated Venlafaxine with one bead (0.3/0.4mg) in the evening, proceeding with two beads (0.7/0.8mg)

since 5th January: 3 beads of Venlafaxine daily and nothing else except fish oil and magnesium. No changes in daily routine

15th January - 17th January: 4 beads of Venlafaxine

since 18th January: back to 3 beads of Venlafaxine due to extreme agitation, introduced Ashwaghanda supplement.

Since 23. January: introduced Lyrica to help with sleep/jerks keeping me awake: updosed from 4mg to 8mg.

Since February: 700mg Valerian and 2mg Melatonin for sleep

March: tapering Lyrica again due to side effects.

April: down to 2 beads of Venlafaxine

17th October: Off everything. Braindead, apathetic/anhedonic Zombie.

 

Link to comment

@Manati

I’m doing my best just trying to be consistent with my trazadone dosage time and bedtime. Today was my last day of rapid taper. Hoping I made the right decision. 
 

Im so glad you slept before. I hope Micheal hypnotizes you!!!
 

I just clicked on your profile for the first time and saw you are a female. This entire time I thought you were male. 
 

Find peace, you deserve it. Don’t give up and give it time. 
 

-humanist 
 

 

1998 -2000 started and stopped several SSRIs because of bad reactions, Zoloft, Paxil, Wellbutrin
2004 to 2006 Prozac 20mg

2004  Klonepin(daily 15 days)VERY bad cold turkey reaction after 15 days of use. 
2012, rehab inpatient alcohol, marijuana (sober since)

2012- present trazadone 50mg (At bedtime) tried twice to stop. 
2012-2017 Prozac 20mg, stopped Prozac CT without many problems. 

12/16/20- present lexapro 10 mg

12/27/20 started rapid lexapro taper 2.5mg every 2 days after only 11 days of use. Drug interaction problems with  trazadone suspected. 
1/2/21 last day of lexapro
1/321 now trying to stabilize on trazadone enough to begin taper. I was not using the trazadone in a consistent  way starting in late October and it thru me into wd  like symptoms. I was taking it at wildly different times each day because my sleep schedule (bed time) would fluctuate. 

 

Link to comment
4 hours ago, Humanist56 said:

@Manati

I’m doing my best just trying to be consistent with my trazadone dosage time and bedtime. Today was my last day of rapid taper. Hoping I made the right decision. 
 

Im so glad you slept before. I hope Micheal hypnotizes you!!!
 

I just clicked on your profile for the first time and saw you are a female. This entire time I thought you were male. 
 

Find peace, you deserve it. Don’t give up and give it time. 
 

-humanist 
 

 

 

 Thank you so much, Humanist!

I'm sure you'll be fine with your taper as you're aware and ready to react if there are any signs of complications. I keep my fingers crossd for you and hope everything will go smoothly.

Also, don't give up, everyone reading this is feeling with you and wishing you well!! 💗

 

 

Fluoxetine (Prozac) (25mg?) from December 2002 - November 2005 for anxiety/depression

Effexor (Venlafaxine) Retard (75mg) due to Panic attacks from November 2005 until around May 2020 when I started tapering off from 75mg to about 33mg in September. Accidentially missed a dose and naively went cold turkey from around 33mg to zero on 26th of September. Hell broke loose in early December.

25th December: Reinstated Venlafaxine with one bead (0.3/0.4mg) in the evening, proceeding with two beads (0.7/0.8mg)

since 5th January: 3 beads of Venlafaxine daily and nothing else except fish oil and magnesium. No changes in daily routine

15th January - 17th January: 4 beads of Venlafaxine

since 18th January: back to 3 beads of Venlafaxine due to extreme agitation, introduced Ashwaghanda supplement.

Since 23. January: introduced Lyrica to help with sleep/jerks keeping me awake: updosed from 4mg to 8mg.

Since February: 700mg Valerian and 2mg Melatonin for sleep

March: tapering Lyrica again due to side effects.

April: down to 2 beads of Venlafaxine

17th October: Off everything. Braindead, apathetic/anhedonic Zombie.

 

Link to comment

So - I got a bit more sleep last night. No idea if that was the lyrica or just my exhaustion from the night before. However, I felt awfully depressed in the early morning - afternoon. Terrible, hopeless feeling.

 

Midnight: magnesium

2am: lights off, quickly fell asleep

4am: woke up anxious

5.25am: woke up anxious

7.45am: woke up with loud ear sound

8.30am: woke up and felt awful, depressed, worthless, hopeless

9.54am: agitated , latent anxiety, nausea, feeling really depressed!

11am: heavy head, feelings of depression, worthlessness, emptiness, despair

12pm: 2 beads of Venlafaxine

12-2pm: feeling depressed, hopeless

2pm-4pm: walk with dog, still feeling down, hopeless

3pm mood slowly improving

6pm: one more bead of Venlafaxine - so back to 3

5pm - 8pm headache, but feeling alright

9pm 12mg Lyrica!

8pm - 2am mood improved, able to read focused

2am magnesium and fish oil

 

Thanks for caring!

 

Fluoxetine (Prozac) (25mg?) from December 2002 - November 2005 for anxiety/depression

Effexor (Venlafaxine) Retard (75mg) due to Panic attacks from November 2005 until around May 2020 when I started tapering off from 75mg to about 33mg in September. Accidentially missed a dose and naively went cold turkey from around 33mg to zero on 26th of September. Hell broke loose in early December.

25th December: Reinstated Venlafaxine with one bead (0.3/0.4mg) in the evening, proceeding with two beads (0.7/0.8mg)

since 5th January: 3 beads of Venlafaxine daily and nothing else except fish oil and magnesium. No changes in daily routine

15th January - 17th January: 4 beads of Venlafaxine

since 18th January: back to 3 beads of Venlafaxine due to extreme agitation, introduced Ashwaghanda supplement.

Since 23. January: introduced Lyrica to help with sleep/jerks keeping me awake: updosed from 4mg to 8mg.

Since February: 700mg Valerian and 2mg Melatonin for sleep

March: tapering Lyrica again due to side effects.

April: down to 2 beads of Venlafaxine

17th October: Off everything. Braindead, apathetic/anhedonic Zombie.

 

Link to comment

@Manati

 

I’m glad you can put together some sleep. I’m always thinking of you and hoping you’ll find relief. I find that when I wake up in those two hour increments that’s when I really have to utilize my techniques to not get caught up in the immediate anxiety about trying to get back to sleep. I’ve always noticed how much easier it is when I don’t have to get up at a certain time on the weekends. 
 

I hope you can find comfort getting some sleep even if it’s interrupted. My anxiety always seems to subside in the evenings. I’m glad you had a pleasant relaxed focused evening as it’s a good sign. 
 

Hang in there my friend,

Humanist 

1998 -2000 started and stopped several SSRIs because of bad reactions, Zoloft, Paxil, Wellbutrin
2004 to 2006 Prozac 20mg

2004  Klonepin(daily 15 days)VERY bad cold turkey reaction after 15 days of use. 
2012, rehab inpatient alcohol, marijuana (sober since)

2012- present trazadone 50mg (At bedtime) tried twice to stop. 
2012-2017 Prozac 20mg, stopped Prozac CT without many problems. 

12/16/20- present lexapro 10 mg

12/27/20 started rapid lexapro taper 2.5mg every 2 days after only 11 days of use. Drug interaction problems with  trazadone suspected. 
1/2/21 last day of lexapro
1/321 now trying to stabilize on trazadone enough to begin taper. I was not using the trazadone in a consistent  way starting in late October and it thru me into wd  like symptoms. I was taking it at wildly different times each day because my sleep schedule (bed time) would fluctuate. 

 

Link to comment
10 hours ago, Humanist56 said:

@Manati

 

I’m glad you can put together some sleep. I’m always thinking of you and hoping you’ll find relief. I find that when I wake up in those two hour increments that’s when I really have to utilize my techniques to not get caught up in the immediate anxiety about trying to get back to sleep. I’ve always noticed how much easier it is when I don’t have to get up at a certain time on the weekends. 
 

I hope you can find comfort getting some sleep even if it’s interrupted. My anxiety always seems to subside in the evenings. I’m glad you had a pleasant relaxed focused evening as it’s a good sign. 
 

Hang in there my friend,

Humanist 

 

Thank you so much for your kind words and encouragement, Humanist!!

Indeed - I think the Lyrica is making me really sleepy. I'm still unsure if it was the right decision to introduce it to my system, but the state I was in was just unbearable. So, my sleep has improved a bit (it's not deep, relaxing sleep and rather superficial, but better than nothing), but the mood I wake up in is terrible. Just despair and hopelessness, and deep feelings of worthlessness.

I hope you can also find some rest after quitting the Trazodone? I really keep my fingers crossed for you, I am so sorry for the situation you are in. I know what you are talking about regarding those difficult phases in the night, when your coping techniques make all the difference to returning to sleep. It feels like the loneliest place in the world. But we are all in this together.

Yeh, I'm usually feeling much better in the evenings, especially after 10pm. My short window of 'normality'. Even though I am already scared of the early mornings by that time. It's just sad.

You too - hang in there!!

Fluoxetine (Prozac) (25mg?) from December 2002 - November 2005 for anxiety/depression

Effexor (Venlafaxine) Retard (75mg) due to Panic attacks from November 2005 until around May 2020 when I started tapering off from 75mg to about 33mg in September. Accidentially missed a dose and naively went cold turkey from around 33mg to zero on 26th of September. Hell broke loose in early December.

25th December: Reinstated Venlafaxine with one bead (0.3/0.4mg) in the evening, proceeding with two beads (0.7/0.8mg)

since 5th January: 3 beads of Venlafaxine daily and nothing else except fish oil and magnesium. No changes in daily routine

15th January - 17th January: 4 beads of Venlafaxine

since 18th January: back to 3 beads of Venlafaxine due to extreme agitation, introduced Ashwaghanda supplement.

Since 23. January: introduced Lyrica to help with sleep/jerks keeping me awake: updosed from 4mg to 8mg.

Since February: 700mg Valerian and 2mg Melatonin for sleep

March: tapering Lyrica again due to side effects.

April: down to 2 beads of Venlafaxine

17th October: Off everything. Braindead, apathetic/anhedonic Zombie.

 

Link to comment

@ManatiI'm happy you've found some relief. It's impossible to know what to do. I had a really bad night, hardly any sleep, not knowing if I was awake or asleep but time passes on the clock an hour at a time. I had maybe 3 or 4 hours of light sleep, I guess. 

 

I'm trying to think of what I've read here that these symptoms and sleep issues will not last forever and I must believe this is not a permanent state. 

 

I'm feeling the compulsion to get up from my chair and pace every few minutes, this is not something I'm really used to. I guess that is something you've experienced? 

 

Thank you so much for your support, there is really nothing other than this forum to go to for me. 

 

-Humanist

1998 -2000 started and stopped several SSRIs because of bad reactions, Zoloft, Paxil, Wellbutrin
2004 to 2006 Prozac 20mg

2004  Klonepin(daily 15 days)VERY bad cold turkey reaction after 15 days of use. 
2012, rehab inpatient alcohol, marijuana (sober since)

2012- present trazadone 50mg (At bedtime) tried twice to stop. 
2012-2017 Prozac 20mg, stopped Prozac CT without many problems. 

12/16/20- present lexapro 10 mg

12/27/20 started rapid lexapro taper 2.5mg every 2 days after only 11 days of use. Drug interaction problems with  trazadone suspected. 
1/2/21 last day of lexapro
1/321 now trying to stabilize on trazadone enough to begin taper. I was not using the trazadone in a consistent  way starting in late October and it thru me into wd  like symptoms. I was taking it at wildly different times each day because my sleep schedule (bed time) would fluctuate. 

 

Link to comment
3 hours ago, Humanist56 said:

@ManatiI'm happy you've found some relief. It's impossible to know what to do. I had a really bad night, hardly any sleep, not knowing if I was awake or asleep but time passes on the clock an hour at a time. I had maybe 3 or 4 hours of light sleep, I guess. 

 

I'm trying to think of what I've read here that these symptoms and sleep issues will not last forever and I must believe this is not a permanent state. 

 

I'm feeling the compulsion to get up from my chair and pace every few minutes, this is not something I'm really used to. I guess that is something you've experienced? 

 

Thank you so much for your support, there is really nothing other than this forum to go to for me. 

 

-Humanist

 

..I know - it's so hard to know what to do. And time just won't pass during those long hours!!

I'm so sorry you had such a sh*tty night. I think you're in a very stressful situation right now, so no wonder you find it hard to sleep. I'm sure things will improve in the long run!

I know the feeling of having to get up and pace around, it's usually when tension builds up more and more and at some point I just can't lie down or sit still anymore. I sometimes just walk in circles in my room then.

Really crossing my fingers for your next night to be better!!

Fluoxetine (Prozac) (25mg?) from December 2002 - November 2005 for anxiety/depression

Effexor (Venlafaxine) Retard (75mg) due to Panic attacks from November 2005 until around May 2020 when I started tapering off from 75mg to about 33mg in September. Accidentially missed a dose and naively went cold turkey from around 33mg to zero on 26th of September. Hell broke loose in early December.

25th December: Reinstated Venlafaxine with one bead (0.3/0.4mg) in the evening, proceeding with two beads (0.7/0.8mg)

since 5th January: 3 beads of Venlafaxine daily and nothing else except fish oil and magnesium. No changes in daily routine

15th January - 17th January: 4 beads of Venlafaxine

since 18th January: back to 3 beads of Venlafaxine due to extreme agitation, introduced Ashwaghanda supplement.

Since 23. January: introduced Lyrica to help with sleep/jerks keeping me awake: updosed from 4mg to 8mg.

Since February: 700mg Valerian and 2mg Melatonin for sleep

March: tapering Lyrica again due to side effects.

April: down to 2 beads of Venlafaxine

17th October: Off everything. Braindead, apathetic/anhedonic Zombie.

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi Manati,

Alright, well, it's tough to know what is what.

In your last note, I see you added another bead of Venlafaxine, but not until 6pm.

And then Lyrica.

On the 2nd of January, you backed down from 3 beads to 2, and then added Diazepam, as well as Lyrica. 

What dose is 1/4 Diazepam?

 

Did you just have additional medications laying around?  Or were these 2 new medications prescribed to you?

Did you check Drugs.com first to see if any interactions.  I'd suggest that you do that.

DrugInteractions-Drugs.com

And then copy and paste here

You can also use that same site to check individual drugs out, before you take them.  You'll see a box at the top of that site to do so.

 

Are you able to use any non-drug coping practices that have helped at all?

I'll also refer you to the Magnesium topic to take a look at.  Most will do divided doses, throughout the day.

Magnesium, nature's calcium channel blocker

 

I'm also going to include:  The rule of 3KIS: Keep it simple, slow, and stable

I'll excerpt a part of that link ^

1. Keep it simple.
 
When the body reacts, often it's difficult to tell what the cause might be. When you're tapering or trying supplements or other treatments, keeping it simple helps reduce confusion during trial-and-error. Keeping it simple minimize confounding factors. For example:
 
1.a. Do not CHANGE the dosage of more than one drug or supplement at a time.
When you change 2 or more drugs at once and you get a bad reaction, you won't know which drug is causing it.
 
1.b. Do not ADD more than one drug or supplement at a time.
When you add more than one thing at a time -- or, worse, throw the kitchen sink into some kind of cocktail -- and you get a bad reaction, you won't have any idea what to do. Should you drop one thing or all of them?
 
This is also true of mixed supplements, supplements that contain more than one ingredient. It's better to try one ingredient at a time to see how you react.

 

But do take a look at the whole link too, please.

 

On 1/3/2021 at 6:13 PM, Manati said:

So - I got a bit more sleep last night. No idea if that was the lyrica or just my exhaustion from the night before. However, I felt awfully depressed in the early morning - afternoon. Terrible, hopeless feeling.

 

Was this the night after the Diazepam too?  I don't know if that IS the culprit, or if it's responsible for the ^.  I never, ever responded positively to any benzo myself.  I think that I might have been lucky in that regard, as it kept me from any long term usage of another medication that would have required a careful taper, AND understanding of.

 

I sure hope the trade off for sleep for you, doesn't have to involve multiple medications, and then leaving you feeling awful on awakening.

 

Was there anything in the sleep links that you found helpful?  Those are back a page, in a post from Alto.

 

Keep us updated.  Hope you are moving towards well and more balance.

 

Thank you.

L, P, H, and G,

mmt

 

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

Link to comment
6 hours ago, manymoretodays said:

 

 

6 hours ago, manymoretodays said:

 

 

Hi Manati,

Alright, well, it's tough to know what is what.

In your last note, I see you added another bead of Venlafaxine, but not until 6pm.

And then Lyrica.

On the 2nd of January, you backed down from 3 beads to 2, and then added Diazepam, as well as Lyrica. 

What dose is 1/4 Diazepam?

 

Did you just have additional medications laying around?  Or were these 2 new medications prescribed to you?

Did you check Drugs.com first to see if any interactions.  I'd suggest that you do that.

DrugInteractions-Drugs.com

And then copy and paste here

You can also use that same site to check individual drugs out, before you take them.  You'll see a box at the top of that site to do so.

 

Are you able to use any non-drug coping practices that have helped at all?

I'll also refer you to the Magnesium topic to take a look at.  Most will do divided doses, throughout the day.

Magnesium, nature's calcium channel blocker

 

I'm also going to include:  The rule of 3KIS: Keep it simple, slow, and stable

I'll excerpt a part of that link ^

1. Keep it simple.
 
When the body reacts, often it's difficult to tell what the cause might be. When you're tapering or trying supplements or other treatments, keeping it simple helps reduce confusion during trial-and-error. Keeping it simple minimize confounding factors. For example:
 
1.a. Do not CHANGE the dosage of more than one drug or supplement at a time.
When you change 2 or more drugs at once and you get a bad reaction, you won't know which drug is causing it.
 
1.b. Do not ADD more than one drug or supplement at a time.
When you add more than one thing at a time -- or, worse, throw the kitchen sink into some kind of cocktail -- and you get a bad reaction, you won't have any idea what to do. Should you drop one thing or all of them?
 
This is also true of mixed supplements, supplements that contain more than one ingredient. It's better to try one ingredient at a time to see how you react.

 

But do take a look at the whole link too, please.

 

 

Was this the night after the Diazepam too?  I don't know if that IS the culprit, or if it's responsible for the ^.  I never, ever responded positively to any benzo myself.  I think that I might have been lucky in that regard, as it kept me from any long term usage of another medication that would have required a careful taper, AND understanding of.

 

I sure hope the trade off for sleep for you, doesn't have to involve multiple medications, and then leaving you feeling awful on awakening.

 

Was there anything in the sleep links that you found helpful?  Those are back a page, in a post from Alto.

 

Keep us updated.  Hope you are moving towards well and more balance.

 

Thank you.

L, P, H, and G,

mmt

 

Dear Manyoretodays!

 

Thank you so much for looking into my case and your feedback.

 

I know it's not ideal to make so many changes to my intake routine. It was just out of desperation and the situation feeling unbearable. The Diazepame had been in my drawer for years - I doubt it even had an effect. Also, I am not planning to repeat that benzo intake - it just felt like an emergency situation.

Now with the Lyrica - I am unsure. I had it prescribed by my doctor for the panic/anxiety, and first was reluctant to take it. I wanted to reinstate the Venlafaxine only, and not have it masked by the effect of other drugs. However, my anxiety was so bad, and also my symptoms (the headaches, sound in my ear..) were so strong, that I wanted to try anything that might help. I have checked for interaction with Venlafaxin and it should be ok (moderate interaction):

Interactions between your drugs

Moderate

venlafaxine

pregabalin

Applies to: venlafaxine, Lyrica (pregabalin)

Treatment with venlafaxine may occasionally cause blood sodium levels to get too low, a condition known as hyponatremia, and using it with pregabalin can increase that risk. In addition, venlafaxine can cause seizures in susceptible patients, which may reduce the effectiveness of medications that are used to control seizures such as pregabalin. Talk to your doctor if you have any questions or concerns.

 

I am also really unsure with the dosage of the Venlafaxine beads. In a way, I cannot imagine that 2 beads (0.7mg)could really create sufficient serum level to ease my symptoms. I am so scared that I could be running out of time for the Venlafaxine to still help me, that I feel rushed to updose! I introduced a 3rd bead - at a later time of the day to see if I could identify any immediate reaciont. I thought I might updose to 2mg and then plateau there for longer?

 

I find it difficult to rely on the non-drug coping techniques, I feel that they provide short term ease/distraction, but can't win against my messed up brain chemistry. At this point in time I am nothing but scared of of everything, especially not ever being stable again!! I will have to be functional for work in February, and at the moment I can't see how this will be possible. I'm so scared to lose everything in my life!

 

I'd be very grateful for your response and advise, especially regarding the Venlafaxine updosing!

Fluoxetine (Prozac) (25mg?) from December 2002 - November 2005 for anxiety/depression

Effexor (Venlafaxine) Retard (75mg) due to Panic attacks from November 2005 until around May 2020 when I started tapering off from 75mg to about 33mg in September. Accidentially missed a dose and naively went cold turkey from around 33mg to zero on 26th of September. Hell broke loose in early December.

25th December: Reinstated Venlafaxine with one bead (0.3/0.4mg) in the evening, proceeding with two beads (0.7/0.8mg)

since 5th January: 3 beads of Venlafaxine daily and nothing else except fish oil and magnesium. No changes in daily routine

15th January - 17th January: 4 beads of Venlafaxine

since 18th January: back to 3 beads of Venlafaxine due to extreme agitation, introduced Ashwaghanda supplement.

Since 23. January: introduced Lyrica to help with sleep/jerks keeping me awake: updosed from 4mg to 8mg.

Since February: 700mg Valerian and 2mg Melatonin for sleep

March: tapering Lyrica again due to side effects.

April: down to 2 beads of Venlafaxine

17th October: Off everything. Braindead, apathetic/anhedonic Zombie.

 

Link to comment

Hi Manati,

 

Not sure if it helps but it may provide comfort to know that someone is going through exactly what you are going through. I am in ‘hell on earth’.  It is truly frightening. I hope you are doing better and that ‘this, too, will pass’

 

 

Current ( 3/7/2021):

Medications: 20 mg Lexapro. 7.5 mg remeron ( started at 15 mg)

Supplements: fish oil

Tapering: Remeron (50% complete). 

Med History:

Lexapro ( 20mg) 2013-current 

Remeron (15 mg) 12/2020- tapering @10% a month followed by 2 week hold

 

 

 

 

Link to comment

Hi Manati, everyone, and Humanist -

 

Manati, I am going through something very similar to you. Every waking moment is filled with anxiety, sleeplessness and terror. Humanist - may I join those zoom support calls?

 

I clicked on of the above links and it would not take me to the site/said it was harmful. Can you repost a zoom link?

 

I may start another thread in the Introduction forum as instructed, but so drained and low right now that I can't right now. I woke up at 4am, with not a lot of anxiety but dread and awful feelings creeped in until I was crying thinking "what's the point" and feeling like it would be easier to be dead. I called a close friend and my brother for support and scheduled a visit with my brother, whom I haven't seen in over a year due to the virus and I miss so terribly. I've been working from home exclusively so I feel I can make the drive...it's just after being isolated for so long, I fear I will go into sensory overload. I'm so confused right now.

 

I don't want to derail this conversation, but I had to at least get a tiny bit of the story out.

Zoloft 100mg - June 2015-April 2018 - 2 month taper, had extreme antsiness (different from my normal anxiety) previously said 25mg, was wrong

Xanax 0.25-0.5mg - Aug 2018- Dec 2020 - Rarely took, probably less than every other month. Over 2020 holidays took 0.5mg 5-6times

Escitalopram 10mg - Aug 2018 - Nov 2020 - tapered over 5 months:

June 25 2020 - Aug 14 2020 - Can't remember what I did but assuming it was 5mg this whole time.

Aug 14 2020 - Oct 24th 2020?? - 2.5mg for awhile, then every 27 hrs. Kept trying to extend length of hrs, up to 36. This is where symptoms got bad but I was able to tolerate as it was more fatigue and irritability.

Oct 25 2020 - mid Nov 2020 - 1.25mg every 24-36 hours, then ct. These are estimates because I was cutting the pills and this is 1/8 of 10mg but by now, it was dust. Tried just having the dust toward the end.

Dec 27 2020 major crying spells and depressive, empty/hopeless feeling dead thoughts. Had a couple ok days, a couple really bad ones a week out.

Reinstated liquid Escitalopram 0.15mg - Jan 12 2021  -  Mar 5 2021 - 0.14mg. Mar 16 2021 - 2.5mg. Mar 17 2021 - 5mg. May 21 2021 - 4.8mg. May 28 2021 4.6mg. Jun 9 2021 4.5mg. Jul 7 4mg. Aug 7 2021 3.6mg. Sep 7 2021 3.2mg. Oct 7 2021 2.8mg. Nov 5 2021 2.45mg. Dec 6 2021 2.2mg. Jan 22 2022 2mg. Feb 13 2022 1.9mg. Mar 2 2022 1.8mg. Mar 18 2022 1.7mg. Apr 5 2022 1.6mg. Apr 22 2022 1.5mg. May 13 2022 1.34mg. Jun 16 2022 1.2mg. Jul 16 2022 1.08mg. Aug 13 2022 .97mg. Sep 11 2022 .87mg. Sep 21 2022 .8mg. Sep 27 2022 .7mg. Oct 8 .6mg. Oct 20 .5mg. Nov 1 .4mg. Nov 13 .34mg. Nov 17 .3mg. Nov 24 .24mg. Nov 30 .18mg. Dec 7 .14mg. Dec 8 .12mg. Dec .1mg. Dec 19 .06mg. Dec 24 .02mg. Dec 31 0mg!!

Fluoxetine bridge - Mar 31 2021 - 10mg. Still on this

Reinstated BC (Nuvaring) - Feb 21 2021. 

 

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9 hours ago, Carolina said:

Hi Manati,

 

Not sure if it helps but it may provide comfort to know that someone is going through exactly what you are going through. I am in ‘hell on earth’.  It is truly frightening. I hope you are doing better and that ‘this, too, will pass’

 

 

 

Dear Carolina,

 

thank you so much for your message - it absolutely provides comfort to know there are others who can relate to the suffering. It is so hard to describe it to anyone who hasn't experienced it - words alone ('anxiety', 'panic' etc..) remain abstract.

I am so sorry that you have to go through the same - and I sadly know that 'hell on earth' in no exaggeration. But you'll get through it, for sure! I'm sending you my best wishes and lots of strength!! 💗

 

Fluoxetine (Prozac) (25mg?) from December 2002 - November 2005 for anxiety/depression

Effexor (Venlafaxine) Retard (75mg) due to Panic attacks from November 2005 until around May 2020 when I started tapering off from 75mg to about 33mg in September. Accidentially missed a dose and naively went cold turkey from around 33mg to zero on 26th of September. Hell broke loose in early December.

25th December: Reinstated Venlafaxine with one bead (0.3/0.4mg) in the evening, proceeding with two beads (0.7/0.8mg)

since 5th January: 3 beads of Venlafaxine daily and nothing else except fish oil and magnesium. No changes in daily routine

15th January - 17th January: 4 beads of Venlafaxine

since 18th January: back to 3 beads of Venlafaxine due to extreme agitation, introduced Ashwaghanda supplement.

Since 23. January: introduced Lyrica to help with sleep/jerks keeping me awake: updosed from 4mg to 8mg.

Since February: 700mg Valerian and 2mg Melatonin for sleep

March: tapering Lyrica again due to side effects.

April: down to 2 beads of Venlafaxine

17th October: Off everything. Braindead, apathetic/anhedonic Zombie.

 

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Hello everyone,

 

I'm still in no better place, ridden with night-long anxiety/restlessness, and really losing hope. I'm so tired but can't sleep due to those symptoms. Even now, at 3pm local time, I'm too anxious to focus on anything. I am still taking my 3 beads of Venlafaxine reinstatement, and wonder if such a small dose can ever have enough effect to stabilize on. I'm so clueless on what to do - updose quicker, in order to have experience an improvement, or wait it out - possibly oversensitizing my body to such a small dose? On the other hand, I don't want to destabilize my system by rushing things, as is always pointed out by Altostrata and Manymoretodays. But 3 beads seem so incredibly little, I've read others reinstated at 2mg, maybe I should updose to at least 6 beads??

 

I'm really despereate for any help/support/input at this point!

 

Thank you for caring!

Fluoxetine (Prozac) (25mg?) from December 2002 - November 2005 for anxiety/depression

Effexor (Venlafaxine) Retard (75mg) due to Panic attacks from November 2005 until around May 2020 when I started tapering off from 75mg to about 33mg in September. Accidentially missed a dose and naively went cold turkey from around 33mg to zero on 26th of September. Hell broke loose in early December.

25th December: Reinstated Venlafaxine with one bead (0.3/0.4mg) in the evening, proceeding with two beads (0.7/0.8mg)

since 5th January: 3 beads of Venlafaxine daily and nothing else except fish oil and magnesium. No changes in daily routine

15th January - 17th January: 4 beads of Venlafaxine

since 18th January: back to 3 beads of Venlafaxine due to extreme agitation, introduced Ashwaghanda supplement.

Since 23. January: introduced Lyrica to help with sleep/jerks keeping me awake: updosed from 4mg to 8mg.

Since February: 700mg Valerian and 2mg Melatonin for sleep

March: tapering Lyrica again due to side effects.

April: down to 2 beads of Venlafaxine

17th October: Off everything. Braindead, apathetic/anhedonic Zombie.

 

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  • Moderator

As Alto and MMT have pointed out reinstatement is a slow and tricky process of trying to get things to balance out without making them worse. It is best to start very small and SLOWLY work you way up in dose. We are looking for the smallest amount of drug that brings the most relief. Reinstatement is not a magic bullet that will make it all go away, but rather a way to take the edge off of things and make them more bearable. These are incredibly powerful drugs making a tiny bit go a very long way toward helping.  Some people will get relief from the very first dose, while for others it can take several weeks for things to settle down.

 

For Venlafaxine, it takes at least 3 days for the dose to become steady state in the blood and 3 - 4 weeks for therapeutic effects to be established. So each dose change can take a long time to have much affect. Changing doses every few days just confuses the matter, as does adding and subtracting other drugs. From your notes it is showing that the 3 beads is having some positive affect.  I would stay at that level for a few weeks to let things stabilize before making any further increases.

 

Attitude and acceptance of the situation are two key factors. I understand just how bad it can make you feel going through it, I did that my self. But things do settle out eventually. Going CT is the hardest way to stop taking these drugs, it can take a long time to stabilize and recover, but we have a lot of members who have done just that. There is a lot of material on attitude and acceptance through out the forum, please search it out and work on adopting the techniques.

20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013.

Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks.  The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better.

Final Dose 0.016mg.     Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017

 

"It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general."  Stephen Hawking

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1 hour ago, brassmonkey said:

As Alto and MMT have pointed out reinstatement is a slow and tricky process of trying to get things to balance out without making them worse. It is best to start very small and SLOWLY work you way up in dose. We are looking for the smallest amount of drug that brings the most relief. Reinstatement is not a magic bullet that will make it all go away, but rather a way to take the edge off of things and make them more bearable. These are incredibly powerful drugs making a tiny bit go a very long way toward helping.  Some people will get relief from the very first dose, while for others it can take several weeks for things to settle down.

 

For Venlafaxine, it takes at least 3 days for the dose to become steady state in the blood and 3 - 4 weeks for therapeutic effects to be established. So each dose change can take a long time to have much affect. Changing doses every few days just confuses the matter, as does adding and subtracting other drugs. From your notes it is showing that the 3 beads is having some positive affect.  I would stay at that level for a few weeks to let things stabilize before making any further increases.

 

Attitude and acceptance of the situation are two key factors. I understand just how bad it can make you feel going through it, I did that my self. But things do settle out eventually. Going CT is the hardest way to stop taking these drugs, it can take a long time to stabilize and recover, but we have a lot of members who have done just that. There is a lot of material on attitude and acceptance through out the forum, please search it out and work on adopting the techniques.

 

Dear Brassmonkey,

 

thank you so much for your detailed and informative response, and for catering to my concerns!

 

I didn't realize Venlafaxine would take so long to show therapeutic effect - this information will help me to try and wait things out a bit longer. It is difficult to remain patient while the situation is still so painful. And also hard to imagine that 3 beads might indeed make a difference. I really hope they will!

 

While I don't expect perfect freedom from symptoms, I pray for those crippling nightly anxiety attacks to ease/fade out and allow me some rest. Without sleep, I won't be able to go to work in February, and that thougth really scares me.

 

I realize acceptance and attitude are of key importance and that I should work on those. In those very acute moments though I just feel they're not enough to endure the situation, but maybe it's really a matter of practice.

 

Thank you again, Brassmonkey, for taking your time and look into my case - I really appreciate it and will update whatever happens.

 

 

 

Fluoxetine (Prozac) (25mg?) from December 2002 - November 2005 for anxiety/depression

Effexor (Venlafaxine) Retard (75mg) due to Panic attacks from November 2005 until around May 2020 when I started tapering off from 75mg to about 33mg in September. Accidentially missed a dose and naively went cold turkey from around 33mg to zero on 26th of September. Hell broke loose in early December.

25th December: Reinstated Venlafaxine with one bead (0.3/0.4mg) in the evening, proceeding with two beads (0.7/0.8mg)

since 5th January: 3 beads of Venlafaxine daily and nothing else except fish oil and magnesium. No changes in daily routine

15th January - 17th January: 4 beads of Venlafaxine

since 18th January: back to 3 beads of Venlafaxine due to extreme agitation, introduced Ashwaghanda supplement.

Since 23. January: introduced Lyrica to help with sleep/jerks keeping me awake: updosed from 4mg to 8mg.

Since February: 700mg Valerian and 2mg Melatonin for sleep

March: tapering Lyrica again due to side effects.

April: down to 2 beads of Venlafaxine

17th October: Off everything. Braindead, apathetic/anhedonic Zombie.

 

Link to comment

Hi Manati, 

 

Sorry to hear what you're going through. Sounds like you are being strong in a very difficult situation.

 

Have you tried a very low dose of melatonin for sleep? I doubt it would make a huge difference, but i've found the 0.3mg tablets can help me sometimes.

 

Take care

Started Lexapro 5mg Mid March 2020

Came off Completely September 2020

Hospitalised september 2021

Slowly worked up to 50mg lamictal and 60mg Prozac

reduced to 20mg Prozac September 2021

Holding 20mg Prozac and 50mg Lamictal for a good while to stabilise. November 2021

Link to comment
On 1/5/2021 at 8:37 PM, tryingtosurvive330 said:

Hi Manati, everyone, and Humanist -

 

Manati, I am going through something very similar to you. Every waking moment is filled with anxiety, sleeplessness and terror. Humanist - may I join those zoom support calls?

 

I clicked on of the above links and it would not take me to the site/said it was harmful. Can you repost a zoom link?

 

I may start another thread in the Introduction forum as instructed, but so drained and low right now that I can't right now. I woke up at 4am, with not a lot of anxiety but dread and awful feelings creeped in until I was crying thinking "what's the point" and feeling like it would be easier to be dead. I called a close friend and my brother for support and scheduled a visit with my brother, whom I haven't seen in over a year due to the virus and I miss so terribly. I've been working from home exclusively so I feel I can make the drive...it's just after being isolated for so long, I fear I will go into sensory overload. I'm so confused right now.

 

I don't want to derail this conversation, but I had to at least get a tiny bit of the story out.

 

Dear tryingtosurvive330 💗 !

 

I'm so sorry for my late response - actually I only just saw your post by coincidence, reading through my thread. Usually, I can see in the notifications whenever someone reacts to my thread, but it doesn't always seem to be the case.

So - I'm sorry if that left you feeling like I don't care: reading your description of what you're going through makes me relate to your suffering so much!! Believe me - I know exactly how bad it is, how you cannot put it into words and just want to crawl out of your skin, leaving it all behind. But please, along with me and so many of us on this site, try to hang on and believe that there will be an end to this. Maybe you'll even find a way to integrate the idea that there might be a reason that you have to go through this hellish realm in this lifetime. This thought helps me in my worst moments. I also just want it to end - but I'm convinced that there is reason in this.

Have you met your brother in the meantime? Even if you haven't - it's great that you have such a close relationship with your brother and also a close friend, we all really need so much support in this situation!!

Let us know how you are doing, I truly care about that and send you all my best thoughts and wishes of healing and strength!!

And please hang on. Also, have you started your thread in order to get some precious advice from the moderators here, and some support from other readers? It helps a lot and you'll be seen! And you might get some important practical advice on how to ease your withdrawal, or reinstating carefully. Without starting this thread, I wouldn't have dared to reinstate a microdose, and at this point I believe I'd feel a lot worse than now.

So try and get in touch with anyone who might be able to provide a littel help!!

I send you a big hug!! 💗

 

 

Fluoxetine (Prozac) (25mg?) from December 2002 - November 2005 for anxiety/depression

Effexor (Venlafaxine) Retard (75mg) due to Panic attacks from November 2005 until around May 2020 when I started tapering off from 75mg to about 33mg in September. Accidentially missed a dose and naively went cold turkey from around 33mg to zero on 26th of September. Hell broke loose in early December.

25th December: Reinstated Venlafaxine with one bead (0.3/0.4mg) in the evening, proceeding with two beads (0.7/0.8mg)

since 5th January: 3 beads of Venlafaxine daily and nothing else except fish oil and magnesium. No changes in daily routine

15th January - 17th January: 4 beads of Venlafaxine

since 18th January: back to 3 beads of Venlafaxine due to extreme agitation, introduced Ashwaghanda supplement.

Since 23. January: introduced Lyrica to help with sleep/jerks keeping me awake: updosed from 4mg to 8mg.

Since February: 700mg Valerian and 2mg Melatonin for sleep

March: tapering Lyrica again due to side effects.

April: down to 2 beads of Venlafaxine

17th October: Off everything. Braindead, apathetic/anhedonic Zombie.

 

Link to comment
On 1/7/2021 at 1:36 AM, mva96 said:

Hi Manati, 

 

Sorry to hear what you're going through. Sounds like you are being strong in a very difficult situation.

 

Have you tried a very low dose of melatonin for sleep? I doubt it would make a huge difference, but i've found the 0.3mg tablets can help me sometimes.

 

Take care

 

Dear mva96 💗

 

Thank you so much for your compassion and kind advice. Actually, I don't feel strong at all, just sort of floating in the storm! But I feel a little hopeful for the Venlafaxine reinstatement to show effect soonish (it's been 2 weeks since reinstating) - please keep your fingers crossed for me!!

I haven't tried melatonin since withdrawing - I didn't dare to, because even though it helps me fall asleep, I usually get a strong morning cortisol rush from it. I hope that my sleep might improve with the Venlafaxine kicking in - please wish me luck with that, I'll also keep you posted!!

 

Thank you for caring!

Fluoxetine (Prozac) (25mg?) from December 2002 - November 2005 for anxiety/depression

Effexor (Venlafaxine) Retard (75mg) due to Panic attacks from November 2005 until around May 2020 when I started tapering off from 75mg to about 33mg in September. Accidentially missed a dose and naively went cold turkey from around 33mg to zero on 26th of September. Hell broke loose in early December.

25th December: Reinstated Venlafaxine with one bead (0.3/0.4mg) in the evening, proceeding with two beads (0.7/0.8mg)

since 5th January: 3 beads of Venlafaxine daily and nothing else except fish oil and magnesium. No changes in daily routine

15th January - 17th January: 4 beads of Venlafaxine

since 18th January: back to 3 beads of Venlafaxine due to extreme agitation, introduced Ashwaghanda supplement.

Since 23. January: introduced Lyrica to help with sleep/jerks keeping me awake: updosed from 4mg to 8mg.

Since February: 700mg Valerian and 2mg Melatonin for sleep

March: tapering Lyrica again due to side effects.

April: down to 2 beads of Venlafaxine

17th October: Off everything. Braindead, apathetic/anhedonic Zombie.

 

Link to comment
2 hours ago, Manati said:

 

Dear tryingtosurvive330 💗 !

 

I'm so sorry for my late response - actually I only just saw your post by coincidence, reading through my thread. Usually, I can see in the notifications whenever someone reacts to my thread, but it doesn't always seem to be the case.

So - I'm sorry if that left you feeling like I don't care: reading your description of what you're going through makes me relate to your suffering so much!! Believe me - I know exactly how bad it is, how you cannot put it into words and just want to crawl out of your skin, leaving it all behind. But please, along with me and so many of us on this site, try to hang on and believe that there will be an end to this. Maybe you'll even find a way to integrate the idea that there might be a reason that you have to go through this hellish realm in this lifetime. This thought helps me in my worst moments. I also just want it to end - but I'm convinced that there is reason in this.

Have you met your brother in the meantime? Even if you haven't - it's great that you have such a close relationship with your brother and also a close friend, we all really need so much support in this situation!!

Let us know how you are doing, I truly care about that and send you all my best thoughts and wishes of healing and strength!!

And please hang on. Also, have you started your thread in order to get some precious advice from the moderators here, and some support from other readers? It helps a lot and you'll be seen! And you might get some important practical advice on how to ease your withdrawal, or reinstating carefully. Without starting this thread, I wouldn't have dared to reinstate a microdose, and at this point I believe I'd feel a lot worse than now.

So try and get in touch with anyone who might be able to provide a littel help!!

I send you a big hug!! 💗

 

 

Hi Manati,

 

Thank you so much for your reply and encouragement, and making sure I knew you saw my note. I think because I am new, my post did not go through for a few days.

 

I have never been able to think there may be a reason for all this, but for some reason, you saying that made me believe it a little. I really hope that's true and I will come out of this. I haven't met with my brother, he lives about a 6-7 hour drive away. We are planning for me to go see him in early or mid-February. Sometimes I still feel hopeless and what's even the point of going, but sometimes I imagine when we're all together again and I feel like I could be happy.

 

Last night was the first night this week that I got a little bit of sleep, woke up within an hour and again at 4am with cortisol spike, but what was different was that this time I did not feel intense fear and dread sink in. I was able to sleep a little more until 6:30am. I hope I can get through today.

 

I did start a thread early this week and they posted it yesterday. I think I will do the same, try to reinstate with a microdose, but I am so nervous now because it's almost 2 months since I was completely off and not sure how quickly I can get liquid form of lexapro which is what I need.

 

Manati, I am the same as you as the one time I tried melatonin a few years ago I felt like I woke up early and it just made me crazy. I also don't feel it helped me to fall asleep, may have been that I was thinking about it too much. I really hope you have moments without anxiety. I realize that for myself, I feel a little lighter beginning around 1pm, it feels like it takes that long for the cortisol to wane.

 

 

 

 

Zoloft 100mg - June 2015-April 2018 - 2 month taper, had extreme antsiness (different from my normal anxiety) previously said 25mg, was wrong

Xanax 0.25-0.5mg - Aug 2018- Dec 2020 - Rarely took, probably less than every other month. Over 2020 holidays took 0.5mg 5-6times

Escitalopram 10mg - Aug 2018 - Nov 2020 - tapered over 5 months:

June 25 2020 - Aug 14 2020 - Can't remember what I did but assuming it was 5mg this whole time.

Aug 14 2020 - Oct 24th 2020?? - 2.5mg for awhile, then every 27 hrs. Kept trying to extend length of hrs, up to 36. This is where symptoms got bad but I was able to tolerate as it was more fatigue and irritability.

Oct 25 2020 - mid Nov 2020 - 1.25mg every 24-36 hours, then ct. These are estimates because I was cutting the pills and this is 1/8 of 10mg but by now, it was dust. Tried just having the dust toward the end.

Dec 27 2020 major crying spells and depressive, empty/hopeless feeling dead thoughts. Had a couple ok days, a couple really bad ones a week out.

Reinstated liquid Escitalopram 0.15mg - Jan 12 2021  -  Mar 5 2021 - 0.14mg. Mar 16 2021 - 2.5mg. Mar 17 2021 - 5mg. May 21 2021 - 4.8mg. May 28 2021 4.6mg. Jun 9 2021 4.5mg. Jul 7 4mg. Aug 7 2021 3.6mg. Sep 7 2021 3.2mg. Oct 7 2021 2.8mg. Nov 5 2021 2.45mg. Dec 6 2021 2.2mg. Jan 22 2022 2mg. Feb 13 2022 1.9mg. Mar 2 2022 1.8mg. Mar 18 2022 1.7mg. Apr 5 2022 1.6mg. Apr 22 2022 1.5mg. May 13 2022 1.34mg. Jun 16 2022 1.2mg. Jul 16 2022 1.08mg. Aug 13 2022 .97mg. Sep 11 2022 .87mg. Sep 21 2022 .8mg. Sep 27 2022 .7mg. Oct 8 .6mg. Oct 20 .5mg. Nov 1 .4mg. Nov 13 .34mg. Nov 17 .3mg. Nov 24 .24mg. Nov 30 .18mg. Dec 7 .14mg. Dec 8 .12mg. Dec .1mg. Dec 19 .06mg. Dec 24 .02mg. Dec 31 0mg!!

Fluoxetine bridge - Mar 31 2021 - 10mg. Still on this

Reinstated BC (Nuvaring) - Feb 21 2021. 

 

Link to comment
3 hours ago, tryingtosurvive330 said:

Hi Manati,

 

Thank you so much for your reply and encouragement, and making sure I knew you saw my note. I think because I am new, my post did not go through for a few days.

 

I have never been able to think there may be a reason for all this, but for some reason, you saying that made me believe it a little. I really hope that's true and I will come out of this. I haven't met with my brother, he lives about a 6-7 hour drive away. We are planning for me to go see him in early or mid-February. Sometimes I still feel hopeless and what's even the point of going, but sometimes I imagine when we're all together again and I feel like I could be happy.

 

Last night was the first night this week that I got a little bit of sleep, woke up within an hour and again at 4am with cortisol spike, but what was different was that this time I did not feel intense fear and dread sink in. I was able to sleep a little more until 6:30am. I hope I can get through today.

 

I did start a thread early this week and they posted it yesterday. I think I will do the same, try to reinstate with a microdose, but I am so nervous now because it's almost 2 months since I was completely off and not sure how quickly I can get liquid form of lexapro which is what I need.

 

Manati, I am the same as you as the one time I tried melatonin a few years ago I felt like I woke up early and it just made me crazy. I also don't feel it helped me to fall asleep, may have been that I was thinking about it too much. I really hope you have moments without anxiety. I realize that for myself, I feel a little lighter beginning around 1pm, it feels like it takes that long for the cortisol to wane.

 

 

 

 

Hi tryingtosurvive! 💗

 

I know it is really difficult to try and see a reason in all this - but if there's meaning to life at all (which I'm convinced of), an experience of such magnitude just has to have a reason. I hope you find some comfort in this thought, too.

I'm glad your night was a bit better and you could find some rest! I'm really hoping that this is the beginning of a trend that will lead to totally peaceful nights of sleep.

Hey if you're 'only' 2 months out of taking your medication, there's still a lot of hope for a successful reinstatement! I'm no expert on Lexapro and would doublecheck with one of the mods on here, but depending on your situation it might make sense to try it. I had the impression that reinstating the Venlafaxine (even after 13 weeks after cold turkeying!) helped taking the edge off the very worst nightly horror. Which doesn't mean that my situation is in any way tolerable - as long as I fall into those nightly states of sheer horror, my life is just out of control. I really hope and pray that those states will stop with the Venlafaxine showing effect.

Oh that's interesting that melatonin had the same effect with you! It did make me tired, but waking up anxious after only 3 hours sleep just wasn't worth it.

My anxiety peaks with those nightly states of terror, and I usually feel really bad until around noon. Then over the course of the afternoon, I usually calm down, and in the evenings/especially LATE evenings, I almost feel 'normal'. With your anxiety lightening around 1pm, this seems to be fairly typical! I really really hope for both of us that we can kick that anxiety for good!!

Fluoxetine (Prozac) (25mg?) from December 2002 - November 2005 for anxiety/depression

Effexor (Venlafaxine) Retard (75mg) due to Panic attacks from November 2005 until around May 2020 when I started tapering off from 75mg to about 33mg in September. Accidentially missed a dose and naively went cold turkey from around 33mg to zero on 26th of September. Hell broke loose in early December.

25th December: Reinstated Venlafaxine with one bead (0.3/0.4mg) in the evening, proceeding with two beads (0.7/0.8mg)

since 5th January: 3 beads of Venlafaxine daily and nothing else except fish oil and magnesium. No changes in daily routine

15th January - 17th January: 4 beads of Venlafaxine

since 18th January: back to 3 beads of Venlafaxine due to extreme agitation, introduced Ashwaghanda supplement.

Since 23. January: introduced Lyrica to help with sleep/jerks keeping me awake: updosed from 4mg to 8mg.

Since February: 700mg Valerian and 2mg Melatonin for sleep

March: tapering Lyrica again due to side effects.

April: down to 2 beads of Venlafaxine

17th October: Off everything. Braindead, apathetic/anhedonic Zombie.

 

Link to comment

Manati - reading your acknowledgement and knowing that we seem to identify with many aspects of this withdrawal/terrible period, makes me feel so seen. It is comforting to know that, even though we live in a lot of horror and dread (I really have to take things hour by hour, minute by minute), I am not the only one and we can get through this together.

 

I had a question, you began your journey with ADs in 2002 for panic attacks/anxiety/depression, right? Do you recall if something had triggered your feelings...did something big happen/big change in your life (even good), or did you just start feeling bad gradually or suddenly?

 

By the way, I noticed at the beginning you said your English may not be great, but it is perfect. It's better than a lot of Americans :)

Zoloft 100mg - June 2015-April 2018 - 2 month taper, had extreme antsiness (different from my normal anxiety) previously said 25mg, was wrong

Xanax 0.25-0.5mg - Aug 2018- Dec 2020 - Rarely took, probably less than every other month. Over 2020 holidays took 0.5mg 5-6times

Escitalopram 10mg - Aug 2018 - Nov 2020 - tapered over 5 months:

June 25 2020 - Aug 14 2020 - Can't remember what I did but assuming it was 5mg this whole time.

Aug 14 2020 - Oct 24th 2020?? - 2.5mg for awhile, then every 27 hrs. Kept trying to extend length of hrs, up to 36. This is where symptoms got bad but I was able to tolerate as it was more fatigue and irritability.

Oct 25 2020 - mid Nov 2020 - 1.25mg every 24-36 hours, then ct. These are estimates because I was cutting the pills and this is 1/8 of 10mg but by now, it was dust. Tried just having the dust toward the end.

Dec 27 2020 major crying spells and depressive, empty/hopeless feeling dead thoughts. Had a couple ok days, a couple really bad ones a week out.

Reinstated liquid Escitalopram 0.15mg - Jan 12 2021  -  Mar 5 2021 - 0.14mg. Mar 16 2021 - 2.5mg. Mar 17 2021 - 5mg. May 21 2021 - 4.8mg. May 28 2021 4.6mg. Jun 9 2021 4.5mg. Jul 7 4mg. Aug 7 2021 3.6mg. Sep 7 2021 3.2mg. Oct 7 2021 2.8mg. Nov 5 2021 2.45mg. Dec 6 2021 2.2mg. Jan 22 2022 2mg. Feb 13 2022 1.9mg. Mar 2 2022 1.8mg. Mar 18 2022 1.7mg. Apr 5 2022 1.6mg. Apr 22 2022 1.5mg. May 13 2022 1.34mg. Jun 16 2022 1.2mg. Jul 16 2022 1.08mg. Aug 13 2022 .97mg. Sep 11 2022 .87mg. Sep 21 2022 .8mg. Sep 27 2022 .7mg. Oct 8 .6mg. Oct 20 .5mg. Nov 1 .4mg. Nov 13 .34mg. Nov 17 .3mg. Nov 24 .24mg. Nov 30 .18mg. Dec 7 .14mg. Dec 8 .12mg. Dec .1mg. Dec 19 .06mg. Dec 24 .02mg. Dec 31 0mg!!

Fluoxetine bridge - Mar 31 2021 - 10mg. Still on this

Reinstated BC (Nuvaring) - Feb 21 2021. 

 

Link to comment

Just jumping on here to say the nightly insomnia, dread, terror, anxiety coaster you are describing sounds all too familiar.

 

When I can’t sleep I listen to guided meditations and other things like that.

 

it really is hell.

Med History - 2014 - 2020 - Zoloft, Effexor, Klonopin, Lexapro, Buspar (No longer on any of these)

Went to my doctor for an annual and mentioned I was stressed, gave me Zoloft, stopped it after 3 months because it didn't do anything, ended up in withdrawal and was told I had a mental illness.  I've been diagnosed Bipolar and Clinically Depressed.  

Current Med Taper 

Lamotrigine - 25mg (May 21') -> 24mg (May 23') -> 23mg (July 23') -> 22mg (Aug 23') -> 21mg (Oct 23') -> 20mg (Dec 23')

Supplement: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to comment
15 hours ago, tryingtosurvive330 said:

Manati - reading your acknowledgement and knowing that we seem to identify with many aspects of this withdrawal/terrible period, makes me feel so seen. It is comforting to know that, even though we live in a lot of horror and dread (I really have to take things hour by hour, minute by minute), I am not the only one and we can get through this together.

 

I had a question, you began your journey with ADs in 2002 for panic attacks/anxiety/depression, right? Do you recall if something had triggered your feelings...did something big happen/big change in your life (even good), or did you just start feeling bad gradually or suddenly?

 

By the way, I noticed at the beginning you said your English may not be great, but it is perfect. It's better than a lot of Americans :)

 

Dear tryingtosurvive 💗

 

Yes it's exactly as you say - the entire situation is so incredibly hard to live through, we just have to reach out and support one another. Also, whenever I experience a particularly bad situation, I find it reassuring to doublecheck that it is still in the range of 'normal', considering the circumstances. I'm really glad if I can help you feel a little less alone in this struggle.

 

To answer your question - yes, I had my first AD prescribed for depression/anxiety in 2002, and the Venlafaxin for panic attacks 3 years later. In both cases, I can clearly identify triggers that started off my feelings: I suffer from a rare form of migraine with a strong, mostly visual 'aura' before the attack. In 1999, while I was still in school, I suffered such an aura - it was really strong (with impaired vision, speech, tactile sensation) and didn't completely fade for about 2 weeks! I was in hospital but they couldn't help me. When the symptoms finally cleared up, my first depression set in - I think I just couldn't fully integrate that traumatic experience and would have needed therapy at the time. I didn't fully recover until 2002, and also became more and more anxious/overwhelmed with being a young adult supposed to set up 'a life', that's when I got prescribed Fluoxetin.

The panic attacks set in after having to share a room with a (probably fairly traumatized) young woman from Ivory Coast during a Summer job in Paris (in 2005). That girl bullied me big time, and over the course of a few weeks, I started having severe panic attacks. It was an awful experience.

 

How about yourself? From what I just read in your thread, you can identify some triggers for feeling so bad right now, but how about when you first started feeling so low that you considered AD? Like you, I am now pretty sure that I would have gotten through my crisis without AD- with a sufficient support, understanding and time. It makes me really sad that we don't seem to live in a time where that's possible. It seems like you were really stressed after working too hard, and missing the most important person in your life - your brother. It's so understandable that you're feeling low!!

I really hope that you'll experience some relief from your stress and get to meet your brother very soon!!

 

..and thank you so much for complimenting my English - as a foreigner, it is hard to ever really feel 'secure' in another language, so I'm really happy about you saying that! 💗

 

Fluoxetine (Prozac) (25mg?) from December 2002 - November 2005 for anxiety/depression

Effexor (Venlafaxine) Retard (75mg) due to Panic attacks from November 2005 until around May 2020 when I started tapering off from 75mg to about 33mg in September. Accidentially missed a dose and naively went cold turkey from around 33mg to zero on 26th of September. Hell broke loose in early December.

25th December: Reinstated Venlafaxine with one bead (0.3/0.4mg) in the evening, proceeding with two beads (0.7/0.8mg)

since 5th January: 3 beads of Venlafaxine daily and nothing else except fish oil and magnesium. No changes in daily routine

15th January - 17th January: 4 beads of Venlafaxine

since 18th January: back to 3 beads of Venlafaxine due to extreme agitation, introduced Ashwaghanda supplement.

Since 23. January: introduced Lyrica to help with sleep/jerks keeping me awake: updosed from 4mg to 8mg.

Since February: 700mg Valerian and 2mg Melatonin for sleep

March: tapering Lyrica again due to side effects.

April: down to 2 beads of Venlafaxine

17th October: Off everything. Braindead, apathetic/anhedonic Zombie.

 

Link to comment
17 hours ago, Jennings said:

Just jumping on here to say the nightly insomnia, dread, terror, anxiety coaster you are describing sounds all too familiar.

 

When I can’t sleep I listen to guided meditations and other things like that.

 

it really is hell.

 

Hey Jennings!

 

..yes indeed - there is hardly another way of describing it. At least we're not alone in experiencing this! I hope you are getting though your struggles alright and don't lose hope.

And thanks for the tips with the guided meditations - those seem to really help many people!!

 

Manati

 

 

Fluoxetine (Prozac) (25mg?) from December 2002 - November 2005 for anxiety/depression

Effexor (Venlafaxine) Retard (75mg) due to Panic attacks from November 2005 until around May 2020 when I started tapering off from 75mg to about 33mg in September. Accidentially missed a dose and naively went cold turkey from around 33mg to zero on 26th of September. Hell broke loose in early December.

25th December: Reinstated Venlafaxine with one bead (0.3/0.4mg) in the evening, proceeding with two beads (0.7/0.8mg)

since 5th January: 3 beads of Venlafaxine daily and nothing else except fish oil and magnesium. No changes in daily routine

15th January - 17th January: 4 beads of Venlafaxine

since 18th January: back to 3 beads of Venlafaxine due to extreme agitation, introduced Ashwaghanda supplement.

Since 23. January: introduced Lyrica to help with sleep/jerks keeping me awake: updosed from 4mg to 8mg.

Since February: 700mg Valerian and 2mg Melatonin for sleep

March: tapering Lyrica again due to side effects.

April: down to 2 beads of Venlafaxine

17th October: Off everything. Braindead, apathetic/anhedonic Zombie.

 

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