Yesyes123: Will I ever be able to quit Lexapro?

[Yesyes123]

Thank you very much @Erell!

[Yesyes123]

Here's a little thing I wrote about "Stability":

 

[Yesyes123]

Here's something I wrote about "Gratitude"

 

 

[Yesyes123]

“When then any man assents to that which is false, be assured that he did not intend to assent to it as false, for every soul is unwillingly deprived of the truth, as Plato says; but the falsity seemed to him to be true.”

 

by Epictetus 

[Yesyes123]

How do you guys deal with the fact doctors are simply clueless about what these drugs really are, how they work, what they actually do to people and especially their possible dangers? Do you just avoid thinking about it?

 

It's not even just that they're clueless - they live in a separate reality where these drugs are "harmless" and always help everyone with little to no problems whatsoever - everything in their lives points to that… I mean,

 

Their colleagues, their teachers at university, their entire literature, the drug companies, the fact these drugs are extremely common and used/ seen as if they're no big deal by most people… everything and everyone they trust tells them to keep drugging people, it's good, you're helping them.

 

Can you really blame them? Yes and no, I think. I mean, I keep thinking that if I was a doctor I would absolutely figure it out instantly and would learn the truth about these drugs. But would I really? Maybe I would have turned into one of those doctors who totally believe these drugs are fixing chemical imbalances...

 

This **** makes me suicidal sometimes. It's just so insanely atrocious and it seems unreal - a dark, twisted horror story. Sometimes I just can't believe the world I lived in and was so happy on is plagued by this demon named psychiatry. People are being told they have brain diseases that aren't real and drugged for them. Innocent, completely normal and healthy people. It's truly sickening.

 

I'm not even sure what's worse… the withdrawal symptoms or the realization that all this insane and terrible sh*t is actually real and it's happening everyday to countless people all around the world. And I'm one of them. It makes me sick to think I put that pill in my mouth everyday for years. 

 

I'm thankful to be on my way out of this and I really want to make a huge difference on this scandal somehow. 

 

@Rosetta how do you deal with this?

[Erell]

Hello @Yesyes123

 

I think many of us can relate to your feelings.

I don't have a clear answer so I'll just try to share some thoughts (forgive me for my English).

 

- I'm not angry at doctors for believing psychiatry paradigm.

I'm angry at them for not giving credit to the patient's experience, for refusing to listen or learn from the last reasearches.

But I understand why they believe this paradigm  : we all did at one point, or we wouldn't be here.

It's a cultural thing.

psychiatry paradigm is collectively accepted in Western countries, our society organized itself around a false narrative.

We all believed at one point that psych drugs were safe and effective. All people around us trust this false narrative too.

As R. Whitaker says, we now need a new narrative. But it takes time, a lot of time. 

It will probably will take decades. 

 

- About individual experience : 

when I discovered infos, started to read on the Internet, discovered Mad in America and then SA it was a shock.

And I don't use this word lightly : it was a real shock.

Because all my beliefs fell apart.

 

Of course I already felt in my gut that something was wrong, that's why I started doing researches.

But still, suddenly your plinths collapse, your definition of yourself falls apart, the way you recount your life plummet.

And who can you trust now ?

 

There is a whole new paradigm to digest, and this is a shock.

It took me years to deconstruct my beliefs.

Shep also has described it wisely and talks about the "un-patienting process", see : https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/22891-sheps-success-leaving-platos-cave/

 

 

- I think the shock with reality can be the same for doctors. Suddenly, you would have to deny all you've learned, all you've believed, all you've done during your career. This can be quite a violent process !

+ the godlike role of doctors in our culture.

+ the complex system of lobbying, Big pharma.

Etc etc...

 

This a real tricky subject, and we won't untangle all this in one day.

 

So how do I deal with this  ?

 

- on one side, I do my best to protect myself. I stopped trying to convince people who are not ready to listen, I'm too fragile atm and need to take care of myself first.

Dealing with the frustration, the anger is too much for me now.

The best I can do to fight psychiatry paradigm is to heal, get better. At least for now.

So I focus on sharing infos and my experience with my close ones and to get their support.

 

- on another hand, I also feel a need to sow seeds, when I feel able to do so.

It is a way for me to give sense to my story and to feel like I contribute to our community.

So, when I feel able to do so, I sow seeds on SA, providing guidelines to taper with a harm reduction approach, providing infos and researches.

I also have created a website to translate infos in my langage, to try to sow seeds in my country.

 

 

I know the shock Yesyes123, we all do.

You sound particularly upset : perhaps you have tried last days to convince a doctor or anyone else ?

It can be extremely draining, especially if the person refuses your experience or deny it. It is very violent.

Personaly I've decided I was not strong enough for now to convince the world, but I sometimes feel strong enough to spread infos to people who are ready to listen and learn from our experiences.

 

Take care of yourself first ❤

 

 

I'll share with you a positive news :

 

 

In April 2021 a book has been published in my country. It is called : 

"Investigation into the antidepressants scandal", written by a journalist.

I've not read it yet, not sure I can, but from what I've watched it might be our equivalent in French of R. Whitaker's book "Anatomy of an epidemic". 

 

https://livre.fnac.com/a15606355/Ariane-Denoyel-Generation-zombie

 

To my knowledge, this is the first time that such a book is published in a big publishing house in France.

To my knowledge, this is the first time this subject is on TV (that's how I heard about it) in France.

To my knowledge, this is the first time this subject is in the big newpapers in France.

 

So things are changing. Slowly, way too slowly, but still they are changing. 

 

Take care ☀️

Edited May 20, 2021 by Erell

[Yesyes123]

Thanks so much for your response @Erell

[gdsequoia]

Hey @Yesyes123,

I noticed you're taking a high dose of vitamin C. I'm interested, what do you take it for?

 

Personally I'm taking 1000mg of it, but not every day - only when I need to do some computer work that day.

[Willfinish]

@Yesyes123 are you still on 15 mg ? It’s impossible to withdraw from this drug.  After 2 years off i’m still not myself

[Yesyes123]

14 hours ago, gdsequoia said:

Hey @Yesyes123,

I noticed you're taking a high dose of vitamin C. I'm interested, what do you take it for?

 

Personally I'm taking 1000mg of it, but not every day - only when I need to do some computer work that day.

 

I'm not taking vitamin C pills anymore. Only eating fruits every now and then for natural vitamin C.

 

I read a while back it could help with cortisol spikes which I was having, but I don't have it anymore. I will update my signature eventually

[Yesyes123]

10 hours ago, Willfinish said:

It’s impossible to withdraw from this drug.  After 2 years off i’m still not myself

 

It's definitely possible to withdrawal from Lexapro with minimal withdrawal symptoms if you take it slow enough (specially in the lower doses). From your signature it looks like you tapered quite fast. You will fully heal eventually, but some people take longer while others are able to even CT after years of use without major problems. It's a really individual thing.

[Willfinish]

@Yesyes123 are you still on 15 mg ? It’s not true. It’s a mess

[Erell]

@Willfinish, I'm really sorry that you are going through a rough patch and truly do understand. I send you my support, really.

I'm sad we have to go through this kind of experience, nobody should.

 

However, please don't use Yesyes123's thread to make negative statements about how impossible it is to recover.

We are a peer support website, the aim is to try to support each other.

An introduction thread is a member's safe place where the membre can share his journey and ask for support.

 

On 4/27/2021 at 9:54 AM, Willfinish said:

No, but now i’m having big windows of feeling normalish. I think the finish line is near here.  

You wrote this in April : the Windows and waves pattern can be a rough one, but it looks like you are making progress.

Unfortunately,  it is not uncommon to read that people might still have waves 2years after a fast taper.

 

Nobody can predict how long will ones body need to recover. However, thanks to all the testimonies of those ahead us, we do know that time heals and that symptoms do gradually fade.

 

Take care ☀️

Edited May 22, 2021 by Erell

[Willfinish]

If i did have not done a fast taper, what is the common pattern for people Who quit the drug with the 10% method when they are off ?

 

thank you @Erell. I was just speaking loud my distress and rage for this situation.

Sorry for that @Yesyes123

[Gridley]

12 minutes ago, Willfinish said:

f i did have not done a fast taper, what is the common pattern for people Who quit the drug with the 10% method when they are off ?

 

It Doesn’t end at “0”

 

[Crochet]

The Lions diet is an all meat diet that is her brand.  I'm pretty sure SA wouldn't recommend something so extreme.  She isn't an expert on AD withdrawal, but she is trying to learn and trying to spread information, which is great.  SA is mentioned by Dr. Jim Wright later in the interview.

[Yesyes123]

1 hour ago, Crochet said:

The Lions diet is an all meat diet that is her brand.  I'm pretty sure SA wouldn't recommend something so extreme.  She isn't an expert on AD withdrawal, but she is trying to learn and trying to spread information, which is great.  SA is mentioned by Dr. Jim Wright later in the interview.

 

Wooow! 

 

Thank you sooooo much you're awesome @Crochet

[Crochet]

My apologies, SA was actually mentioned by Dr. David Cohen.

 

I hope you are doing okay, yesyes!

[Yesyes123]

Does anyone know about thinning hair? I read iron supplementation could help it.

 

I was put on finasteride for it last year (only took it for about 2 months) and I think it affected my mood a lot (very irritable) and that was what led me to want to stop lexapro and kickstarted my entire journey.

 

I feel like my hair has been thinning since WD.

[Go2zero]

1 hour ago, Yesyes123 said:

Does anyone know about thinning hair?

 

I experience the same. My theory is that our CNS, our body and mind are so stressed through WD, that this also influences our hair. It is a well know fact that stress can give hair loss and thinning of hair. 

[Willfinish]

@Yesyes123 you’re on 15mg of escitalopram which is a so high dosage, so what withdrawal are you having ? I think escitalopram helps with hair by reducing testosterone levels

 

[Yesyes123]

33 minutes ago, Willfinish said:

@Yesyes123 you’re on 15mg of escitalopram which is a so high dosage, so what withdrawal are you having ? I think escitalopram helps with hair by reducing testosterone levels

 

 

Do you have any links to anything about that? I've never seen anyone say it could help keep hair

[Yesyes123]

Does escitalopram actually reduce testosterone?

[Yesyes123]

I haven't been posting here much on my thread, but I've been doing all types of research and found it's not just psychiatry that can't be trusted; it's the entire western medicine establishment and basically every institution (the government, media, etc). I no longer think being against these things makes you weird or a "conspiracionist". It's true: our world is extremely f***** up in too many ways...

 

Diet is one of the most important things we need to look into, during withdrawal or not: it's our fuel, what makes us, us - more than just physically!

 

I want to post more about that, but everyone should research about oils that they use for cooking and preferably switch to coconut oil instead of vegetal oils.

[Yesyes123]

Today I have started taking 400IU Vitamin E from 21st Century to help fish oil to work: 

 

I also bought probiotics with bifidobacterium infantis that I will start taking in about 2 weeks to make sure Vitamin E isn't causing problems.

 

I will update my signature eventually.

[Johni]

Hello. Is there a basis for anxiety? Or a constant lurking feeling?

[Yesyes123]

6 hours ago, Johni said:

Hello. Is there a basis for anxiety? Or a constant lurking feeling?

 

Hey Johni, not really... how are you doing at 4mg? Hope you're well!

[Johni]

Hello. thank you for your question. I'm pretty changeable. but I work. does distraction not work for anxiety either?

[Yesyes123]

9 minutes ago, Johni said:

Hello. thank you for your question. I'm pretty changeable. but I work. does distraction not work for anxiety either?

 

Yeah distraction is a must for our situation. I think meditation and calm prayer also help a lot.

[Johni]

for me right now meditation doesn’t really work. After 1-2 minutes, my brain goes completely elsewhere.

[Yesyes123]

19 minutes ago, Johni said:

for me right now meditation doesn’t really work. After 1-2 minutes, my brain goes completely elsewhere.

 

I think meditation is extremely complex and there are many different types of it that you can try... what kind are you doing? Chanting mantras?

[Johni]

I usually use guided meditation or autogenous training.

[Willfinish]

@Yesyes123 how are you ? when you start tapering ? 

[Yesyes123]

I think eggs are a daily must for people on WD. I want to write here more about things I've been learning about eggs. I bought organic eggs today that even say on the front "Rich in Omega 3 + Vitamin E"

[Crochet]

@Yesyes123Really nice job on the video!  I've still been measuring slivers.  This will help many visual learners for sure!  I like that you explained that it's not overwhelming, even though it might seem that way.

[Yesyes123]

If you're a man in withdrawal, you need to stop masturbating. And cut porn off completely. If you follow this, you'll thank me later.