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My wife and citalopram


NeedSomeHope

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NeedSomeHope

My wife was on Citalopram 20mg for five years. She did a very fast taper removing half a pill a week. Some weeks removing two half pills. At about 5 or 6 weeks she was down to 10mg and just stopped. She didn't have much withdrawal just a few brain zaps.  She has lost all romantic feelings for me. Early on in the taper she would have moments of affection. Now it's been over 3 months since she has shown affection. If i ask questions she gets annoyed and divorce talk  comes up. She does says loving feelings for me do come in sometimes.  They can change hourly, but usually just come in maybe once a day or a few times a week. Then they leave a quick a they came in. 

 

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Hello @NeedSomeHope,

I am so sorry to read this. First of all, I am not a mod of this forum, but I will speak from my experience. I too tappered citalopram too quick. At first I felt great, full of energy and feelings for mu husband and everyone around me. However, after a couple of months, I was not able to speak to anybody. Everything was too annoying and exhausting. I am not saying that your wife is experiencing the same symptons as I did, but I too did want to run away from everything and everyone at that moment. Now my husband is my best ally in fighting WD. Have you talk to your wife about withdrawal? Does she have other symptons? 

 

 

March 2019: 10mg Citalopram

April 2019: 20mg Citalopram

October/November 2019(sorry, I don't remember the exact date): 10mg of Citalopram without tapering, as suggested by my pharmacist. 

March 2020: Started "tapering", taking the 10mg of Citalopram every other day, again, following the recommendations of my pharmacist. 

April 2020: Stopped taking Citalopram.

I haven't reinstall since then. I've tried taking Magnesium a couple of times, but I found out it makes me nervous. I only take Paracetemol when the headache becomes unbearable (2gr every couple of weeks or so). 

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NeedSomeHope

My wife gets annoyed if I talk to her about the pills or our relationship. Occasionally I get away with a few questions but she quickly gets annoyed. She has never mentioned any withdrawal at all other than the brain zaps. She had a couple emotional moments early on like crying over a Netflix show about 5 weeks after stopping the pills. Mostly she seems very happy. It is annoying because she walks around singing and smiling like life is the best its been in a while while I am distressed over our family life and how this may affect our kids. She is told me she could live as roommates forever since these are the cards she's been dealt. It's very distressing to me, I tried to hug her a couple weeks ago and she clearly had no emotion for me. The only encouraging sign is her telling me that loving feelings for me do come in occasionally but they don't last. She also says it very well could be the pills but said it doesn't help because she has been off for four months and nothing is changing. Since getting off the pills I notice she drinks less and much more affectionate with the kids. I do see her take a lot of Advil but if I try to tie anything back to meds it just makes her annoyed. She seems a lot more like who she was before meds now except still no feelings for me. Did you lose feelings for you husband? If so how long until they came back?   Did you experience loving feelings coming and going? If so was it all along or close to when you were healed? Did you come back slowly, have an awakening or combination of both?

 

thank you

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Hello @NeedSomeHope,

 

YEs, I lost feelings for my husband. I would say It was about 3/4 months after stopping the citalopram. That feeling lasted about 5/6 months. I have to say that still to this date sometimes I feel like my husband is driving me crazy, but I have no doubt about my feelings. It was a very confusing period for myself, as a lot of things changed nada I did not know what was happening. As I said, this is my experience. Withdrawal varies from one person to other and It last differently depending on how long you've been on the drugs. 

March 2019: 10mg Citalopram

April 2019: 20mg Citalopram

October/November 2019(sorry, I don't remember the exact date): 10mg of Citalopram without tapering, as suggested by my pharmacist. 

March 2020: Started "tapering", taking the 10mg of Citalopram every other day, again, following the recommendations of my pharmacist. 

April 2020: Stopped taking Citalopram.

I haven't reinstall since then. I've tried taking Magnesium a couple of times, but I found out it makes me nervous. I only take Paracetemol when the headache becomes unbearable (2gr every couple of weeks or so). 

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NeedSomeHope

Thank you! When i asked about loving feelings coming and going i man did they keep repeatedly changing. My wife says sometimes as much as hourly.  She says they come in and can leave just as quickly.

 

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Yes, I felt that way. One moment I would be like "this relationship makes no sense" and a couple of hours later I would be crying because of how much I love my husband and the bad times he has to endure because of me. The only way I can explain It is that in WD we are not entire owners of our thoughts and feelings, It is too much to some of us. Again, this is/was me. 

March 2019: 10mg Citalopram

April 2019: 20mg Citalopram

October/November 2019(sorry, I don't remember the exact date): 10mg of Citalopram without tapering, as suggested by my pharmacist. 

March 2020: Started "tapering", taking the 10mg of Citalopram every other day, again, following the recommendations of my pharmacist. 

April 2020: Stopped taking Citalopram.

I haven't reinstall since then. I've tried taking Magnesium a couple of times, but I found out it makes me nervous. I only take Paracetemol when the headache becomes unbearable (2gr every couple of weeks or so). 

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  • 3 weeks later...

I do feel like she is not the owner of her thoughts and feelings. She does seem to be all over the place mentally. I am learning my best bet is to just let her be and do my own thing. Any kind of pressure or interrogation always makes things worse.

Do you think feelings coming and going is a sign that she is going to heal soon? Did it happen for you early or late in the process? Did they start changing in frequency or intensity? 

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