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TheEggMan: Desperate - Need Help


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I was prescribed benzodiazepines and z-drugs (termazepam, ambien, and lunesta at various times) for almost 20 years for insomnia that was the result of some chronic pain issues that made it difficult to sleep.  About 7 or 8 years ago I started to realize that these drugs were doing bad things. I was having interdose withdrawal and would get powerful shakes every afternoon as the drugs left my system.


It took me several years but I finally tapered off these drugs and stopped them about 5 years ago, and opened up the gates of hell in my life.  I've never truly recovered from being on those drugs.  I'm left with crippling anxiety and constant physical pain and muscle spasm.


In the process of trying to address the issues of withdrawing from benzos/z-drugs I was put on various ADs - lexapro, seroquel, bupropion, buspirone, and lately nortriptyline and trazodone for sleep.


Many of those drugs caused immediate bad reactions and I didn't stay on them long (seroquel, bupropion, buspirone).  The lexapro I was on for at least a year. I'm still on the nortriptyline and I don't seem to be able to get off.


I've been through the wringer. I'm basically miserable all the time. Terrible anxiety and looping ruminating negative thoughts. I seem to be scared of everything. And, I have a lot of physical pain that I never had before dropping the benzos. 


A lot of this (probably most but difficult to tell) is the result of the long term benzo/z-drug use. But a fair bit is due to the recent cornucopia of various ADs.  


If I'm honest with myself I've given up hope of ever getting better. Five years is a long time. But, I thought I'd take a stab at this one more time and see if anyone has any ideas of what might help me.  The doctors have done nothing for me but shove more pills at me.  They just want to keep stacking one pill on top of another. It is only because of my own personal initiative that I'm now only on nortriptyline and trazodone.  If I kept taking what they prescribed I'd be on five or six medications at the moment.


Can anyone help me? Is there any hope?

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  • Administrator

Welcome, @TheEggMan


What effects do nortriptyline and trazodone have on you?


Have you ever tried a very low dose of a benzo?


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