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Greatful: Is this withdrawal or to many med changes at once


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3 minutes ago, Greatful said:

@Cheeky  So, so. Feeling some low mood.  Some fatigue.  Trying not to get sucked down the neg tube.  I feel like I am fighting a constant fear for the last few days.  Panicky.  

Can we have a few days of peace😰.  It can  be very frustrating too feel like you are almost back to some small amount of  sanity, but can't quite get over the line.  I really need to look at it as a positive sign.  Right!

I wonder if I have some Xanax W/D along with the other drug W/D.  I guess at this point it really doesn't matter.

 

Here is a weird one for you,  Can half of you feel happy and then the other half of you feel down?

I was out for my walk this morning and felt some joy but also felt some low mood at the same time.  Crazy Crazy Crazy.

 

How about you?  

Are you still up at night? 

How is the patch working out?  I quit smoking about 30 years ago.  That was pretty hard.   I would  smoke in my dreams for many, many years. (that usually meant I was stressed  about something).

 

Hang in there.

Have a super day🤩

 

 

1995 started Paxil 20mg slowly increasing to 50mg until 2014

-2014 I decided to tapper myself not knowing how too and crashed , DR added 50mg Seraquel

-2015 tried tapering again and crashed

Seroquel Taper

2/11/16 43mg  1/09/17  37.5mg  10/03/10 36.25mg. 17/3/19 35mg 26/3/19 33.75mg  4/4/19 32.5mg  21/4/19 30mg

16/7/19 28.75mg  5/8/19 27.5mg. 19/8/19 25mg   4/8/20 23mg 18/8/20 22.5mg  12/10/20 18.25mg  10/1/21 15mg  3/8/21 UPDOSE 16mg

Paxil Taper

2/11/16 40mg 12/10/17 37mg  28/10/17 36mg  10/1/18. 35mg  24/05/18 33mg  28/8/18 31mg 16/12/18 30mg 20/10/19 29mg  17/11/19 28mg 7/1/20  27mg 12/2/20  26mg 7/3 /20 25mg  11/4/20 24mg 4/5/20 23mg  5/6/20 22mg 23/6/20 21mg 15/7/20 20mg

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@rubywednesday  Thank you, I really appreciate the kind words. Knowing that people who can relate and are ready to help out and offer words of kindness is heart warming.    I am hoping for s

@Greatful, good morning my friend. I have just completed this meditation and I found it really helpful! It reduced my anxiety from 8 to 4. Of course now it creeps back in but I am going to go do it ag

@DiscJockey I know that feeling so well. Your sitting there looking at everyone being happy and remembering how you use to feel . You try to be your old self but your dying inside. If your credit for

Just now, Cheeky said:

wonder if I have some Xanax W/D along with the other drug W/D.  I guess at this point it really doesn't matter.

100% you are, you’ve had so many changes, your nervous system just has to settle down.

1995 started Paxil 20mg slowly increasing to 50mg until 2014

-2014 I decided to tapper myself not knowing how too and crashed , DR added 50mg Seraquel

-2015 tried tapering again and crashed

Seroquel Taper

2/11/16 43mg  1/09/17  37.5mg  10/03/10 36.25mg. 17/3/19 35mg 26/3/19 33.75mg  4/4/19 32.5mg  21/4/19 30mg

16/7/19 28.75mg  5/8/19 27.5mg. 19/8/19 25mg   4/8/20 23mg 18/8/20 22.5mg  12/10/20 18.25mg  10/1/21 15mg  3/8/21 UPDOSE 16mg

Paxil Taper

2/11/16 40mg 12/10/17 37mg  28/10/17 36mg  10/1/18. 35mg  24/05/18 33mg  28/8/18 31mg 16/12/18 30mg 20/10/19 29mg  17/11/19 28mg 7/1/20  27mg 12/2/20  26mg 7/3 /20 25mg  11/4/20 24mg 4/5/20 23mg  5/6/20 22mg 23/6/20 21mg 15/7/20 20mg

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4 minutes ago, Cheeky said:

Here is a weird one for you,  Can half of you feel happy and then the other half of you feel down?

Not strange at all, I feel happy when I’m a window then when the wave hits I feel so safe, this has been happening daily, I just thought it was only me.

1995 started Paxil 20mg slowly increasing to 50mg until 2014

-2014 I decided to tapper myself not knowing how too and crashed , DR added 50mg Seraquel

-2015 tried tapering again and crashed

Seroquel Taper

2/11/16 43mg  1/09/17  37.5mg  10/03/10 36.25mg. 17/3/19 35mg 26/3/19 33.75mg  4/4/19 32.5mg  21/4/19 30mg

16/7/19 28.75mg  5/8/19 27.5mg. 19/8/19 25mg   4/8/20 23mg 18/8/20 22.5mg  12/10/20 18.25mg  10/1/21 15mg  3/8/21 UPDOSE 16mg

Paxil Taper

2/11/16 40mg 12/10/17 37mg  28/10/17 36mg  10/1/18. 35mg  24/05/18 33mg  28/8/18 31mg 16/12/18 30mg 20/10/19 29mg  17/11/19 28mg 7/1/20  27mg 12/2/20  26mg 7/3 /20 25mg  11/4/20 24mg 4/5/20 23mg  5/6/20 22mg 23/6/20 21mg 15/7/20 20mg

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6 minutes ago, Cheeky said:

How about you?  

Are you still up at night? 

How is the patch working out?  I quit smoking about 30 years ago.  That was pretty hard.   I would  smoke in my dreams for many, many years. (that usually meant I was stressed  about something).

The patches are doing there job, I stopped smoking 15 years ago but the last 6 months I was vaping occasionally not thinking it was addictive and then realised I was. I have never vaped I. Front of my kids they would never know. I Only ever drink alcohol maybe once or twice a year. I take my parenting really serious and like to be a good role model. I just want my kids to be grounded and happy.

my sleep at night has been good and I can see improvements overall since 4 weeks ago, but I’m desperate for stability. I still get aniexty  in the mornings , so I go for an hour walk and listen to audiobooks. The latest one is called the “The Dare Respone”  it’s really good so far. It’s all about dealing with your aniexty thoughts. I know so much but so hard to do.  I think my problem is I read to many of the bad stories about drugs and it scares me. I just wish there was a lot more success stories. 

1995 started Paxil 20mg slowly increasing to 50mg until 2014

-2014 I decided to tapper myself not knowing how too and crashed , DR added 50mg Seraquel

-2015 tried tapering again and crashed

Seroquel Taper

2/11/16 43mg  1/09/17  37.5mg  10/03/10 36.25mg. 17/3/19 35mg 26/3/19 33.75mg  4/4/19 32.5mg  21/4/19 30mg

16/7/19 28.75mg  5/8/19 27.5mg. 19/8/19 25mg   4/8/20 23mg 18/8/20 22.5mg  12/10/20 18.25mg  10/1/21 15mg  3/8/21 UPDOSE 16mg

Paxil Taper

2/11/16 40mg 12/10/17 37mg  28/10/17 36mg  10/1/18. 35mg  24/05/18 33mg  28/8/18 31mg 16/12/18 30mg 20/10/19 29mg  17/11/19 28mg 7/1/20  27mg 12/2/20  26mg 7/3 /20 25mg  11/4/20 24mg 4/5/20 23mg  5/6/20 22mg 23/6/20 21mg 15/7/20 20mg

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Thankyou @Greatfulfor listening to me and your support, it keeps me going.🌈

1995 started Paxil 20mg slowly increasing to 50mg until 2014

-2014 I decided to tapper myself not knowing how too and crashed , DR added 50mg Seraquel

-2015 tried tapering again and crashed

Seroquel Taper

2/11/16 43mg  1/09/17  37.5mg  10/03/10 36.25mg. 17/3/19 35mg 26/3/19 33.75mg  4/4/19 32.5mg  21/4/19 30mg

16/7/19 28.75mg  5/8/19 27.5mg. 19/8/19 25mg   4/8/20 23mg 18/8/20 22.5mg  12/10/20 18.25mg  10/1/21 15mg  3/8/21 UPDOSE 16mg

Paxil Taper

2/11/16 40mg 12/10/17 37mg  28/10/17 36mg  10/1/18. 35mg  24/05/18 33mg  28/8/18 31mg 16/12/18 30mg 20/10/19 29mg  17/11/19 28mg 7/1/20  27mg 12/2/20  26mg 7/3 /20 25mg  11/4/20 24mg 4/5/20 23mg  5/6/20 22mg 23/6/20 21mg 15/7/20 20mg

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  • Mentor
Greatful

@CheekyYou sound like me, read this book, listen to this or that, try this or that.  I can feel vary over whelmed by it all. I am still trying to get acceptance down.🤪  I think I am starting to see a little improvements in recognizing that thoughts are that just thoughts. Why in the world am I afraid of my thoughts  😬 But I do get caught up in the dialogue with them more than I would like.  But I guess it is a start when you can redirect yourself some of the time or at least not get into a big dialogue.  I guess that is part of the process, learning to just observe  your thoughts and not engage with them.  Sometimes I feel like I am trying to learn how to  do some alien trick.  I mean really, how do you just observe you thoughts? I am finding  I will try just about anything to get through this. Tapping, meditation, alternate nostril breathing,  They say these things work.  It may take me awhile to master, but one must not give up.

 

Vent anytime.  I do find that as I try and support or encourage someone else it can sometimes help me.  We are there for each other.♥️

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

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4 minutes ago, Greatful said:

Sometimes I feel like I am trying to learn how to  do some alien trick. 

😂😂😂😂😂 that’s so funny, at least  we still have our sense of humour 

1995 started Paxil 20mg slowly increasing to 50mg until 2014

-2014 I decided to tapper myself not knowing how too and crashed , DR added 50mg Seraquel

-2015 tried tapering again and crashed

Seroquel Taper

2/11/16 43mg  1/09/17  37.5mg  10/03/10 36.25mg. 17/3/19 35mg 26/3/19 33.75mg  4/4/19 32.5mg  21/4/19 30mg

16/7/19 28.75mg  5/8/19 27.5mg. 19/8/19 25mg   4/8/20 23mg 18/8/20 22.5mg  12/10/20 18.25mg  10/1/21 15mg  3/8/21 UPDOSE 16mg

Paxil Taper

2/11/16 40mg 12/10/17 37mg  28/10/17 36mg  10/1/18. 35mg  24/05/18 33mg  28/8/18 31mg 16/12/18 30mg 20/10/19 29mg  17/11/19 28mg 7/1/20  27mg 12/2/20  26mg 7/3 /20 25mg  11/4/20 24mg 4/5/20 23mg  5/6/20 22mg 23/6/20 21mg 15/7/20 20mg

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5 minutes ago, Greatful said:

@CheekyYou sound like me, read this book, listen to this or that, try this or that.  I can feel vary over whelmed by it all. I am still trying to get acceptance down.🤪  I think I am starting to see a little improvements in recognizing that thoughts are that just thoughts. Why in the world am I afraid of my thoughts  😬 But I do get caught up in the dialogue with them more than I would like.  But I guess it is a start when you can redirect yourself some of the time or at least not get into a big dialogue.  I guess that is part of the process, learning to just observe  your thoughts and not engage with them.  Sometimes I feel like I am trying to learn how to  do some alien trick.  I mean really, how do you just observe you thoughts? I am finding  I will try just about anything to get through this. Tapping, meditation, alternate nostril breathing,  They say these things work.  It may take me awhile to master, but one must not give up.

 

Vent anytime.  I do find that as I try and support or encourage someone else it can sometimes help me.  We are there for each other.♥️

I think Ive downloaded 5 books in desperation.  
Yes we just have to keep going 

1995 started Paxil 20mg slowly increasing to 50mg until 2014

-2014 I decided to tapper myself not knowing how too and crashed , DR added 50mg Seraquel

-2015 tried tapering again and crashed

Seroquel Taper

2/11/16 43mg  1/09/17  37.5mg  10/03/10 36.25mg. 17/3/19 35mg 26/3/19 33.75mg  4/4/19 32.5mg  21/4/19 30mg

16/7/19 28.75mg  5/8/19 27.5mg. 19/8/19 25mg   4/8/20 23mg 18/8/20 22.5mg  12/10/20 18.25mg  10/1/21 15mg  3/8/21 UPDOSE 16mg

Paxil Taper

2/11/16 40mg 12/10/17 37mg  28/10/17 36mg  10/1/18. 35mg  24/05/18 33mg  28/8/18 31mg 16/12/18 30mg 20/10/19 29mg  17/11/19 28mg 7/1/20  27mg 12/2/20  26mg 7/3 /20 25mg  11/4/20 24mg 4/5/20 23mg  5/6/20 22mg 23/6/20 21mg 15/7/20 20mg

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  • Moderator

Hello @Greatful

 

I have recently read some of your posts and wanted to share with you how much I appreciate your ability to help others and the ton of your posts.

You really an amazing contributor  in this community.

 

And helping others can sometimes be a great selfcare tip!

Please do take good care of yourself, you deserve it too ❤

 

I do hope you'll feel better soon and send you all my support ☀️

2006 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2008 : cold turkey of both

2010 : 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, taper to 0.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22 Aug 2019 updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457-

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

 

Current medication :

* 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* Prozac : 6.8 mg (15 Sept 2021)/ 6.88mg (14 Aug 2021)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 2021)

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Yersinia

Good Morning @Greatful What’s your mantra for today? Hope you’re feeling good.

2004 - prozac then wellbutrin (don't recall dosages)

2005 - 150 mg Effexor Rx (or generic equivalent)

April 28, 2021 first day without Effexor after very rapid titration off (probably equivalent to CT).

July 23, 2021 Reinstatement of ~3mg of Venlafaxine ER (~8.9mg of capsule material).

 

50 mg Chelated Magnesium, 4X a day

1000mg DHA+EPA Fish oil 2X day

 

 

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  • Mentor
Greatful

@Erell  Thank You for your kind words.  Like you and everyone else trying to make it through this very trying time in our lives really need to be heard and feel like they are not alone.  

 

Your so right,  when we can help others it can give us the encouragement to make it through another day.  Man some days are hard!

 

Have a great day☺️

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

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  • Mentor
Greatful

@Yersinia  Good morning

 

I think I will use the one "I am okay at this moment"   Mornings are tough for me, so I am in a little slump.  Feeling that whiny part coming out.

 

How about you, starting out good?

Have a great day☺️

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

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  • Moderator
getofflex

Great job on using coping skills greatful!  I’m also in a bit of a slump but I’m just going about my day and taking it easy. This too shall pass.  You do a lot of wonderful work on this forum.   

***Please note this is not medical advice.  Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a doctor who understands psych meds and how to withdraw from them, if you can find one.

Lexapro   Started Apr 15 '02 - 10 mg;  Apr 2 '20  0.18 mg; Jul 16  0.17 mg, Aug 23  0.16 mg, Oct 7  0.15 mg, Nov 8 - 0.14, Jan 16 '21 - 0.13, Feb 7 - 0.12, Feb 22 - 0.11, Mar 26 - 0.10, May 21 - 0.09, June 15 - 0.08 Aug 16 - 0.07, Oct 6 - 0.06 

Ibuprofen 800 mg, or Tylenol 1000 mg as needed

other meds: Levothyroxine 75 mg

Trazodone nightly, stopped in late 2019

Xanax on occasion, stopped in late 2019

magnesium in small amounts at breakfast, 3 PM 

suppl AM: fish oil, flax oil, vit C, vit E, calcium

suppl PM: magnesium 350 mg, GABA 750 mg, Estroven, melatonin 2.5 mg

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Yersinia

My morning is going along OK @Greatful - made it to work and sitting in my office without my heart pounding out of my chest like it has been recently.  It's a good day today.  Hope you're hanging in.

2004 - prozac then wellbutrin (don't recall dosages)

2005 - 150 mg Effexor Rx (or generic equivalent)

April 28, 2021 first day without Effexor after very rapid titration off (probably equivalent to CT).

July 23, 2021 Reinstatement of ~3mg of Venlafaxine ER (~8.9mg of capsule material).

 

50 mg Chelated Magnesium, 4X a day

1000mg DHA+EPA Fish oil 2X day

 

 

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Hello my lovely lady, I’m just chiming in to see if you’re okay? I hope you get a window soon. Heart ❤️ 

1995 started Paxil 20mg slowly increasing to 50mg until 2014

-2014 I decided to tapper myself not knowing how too and crashed , DR added 50mg Seraquel

-2015 tried tapering again and crashed

Seroquel Taper

2/11/16 43mg  1/09/17  37.5mg  10/03/10 36.25mg. 17/3/19 35mg 26/3/19 33.75mg  4/4/19 32.5mg  21/4/19 30mg

16/7/19 28.75mg  5/8/19 27.5mg. 19/8/19 25mg   4/8/20 23mg 18/8/20 22.5mg  12/10/20 18.25mg  10/1/21 15mg  3/8/21 UPDOSE 16mg

Paxil Taper

2/11/16 40mg 12/10/17 37mg  28/10/17 36mg  10/1/18. 35mg  24/05/18 33mg  28/8/18 31mg 16/12/18 30mg 20/10/19 29mg  17/11/19 28mg 7/1/20  27mg 12/2/20  26mg 7/3 /20 25mg  11/4/20 24mg 4/5/20 23mg  5/6/20 22mg 23/6/20 21mg 15/7/20 20mg

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  • Mentor
Greatful

I thought I would do a quick update.   I am in a WINDOW.  I just want it on record so when my brain goes haywire again I can look back and see that I am in here somewhere.

 

  My description of my brain for the last 6- 8 months.  Look into one of those mirrors at fairs were you look all distorted and nothing lines up right.  Well that is how my brain feels and thinks 90% of the time, and don't forget to add in the buzzing, tingling, vice grips on my temples, burning, crushing feeling like sink holes in the brain and headaches.

Of course lets not forget the depression and anxiety.

 

But whos complaining.    I can say there has been some healing going on.  My left side of my face and left eyes do not get as numb or happen as often as before.

 

I also have to say that learning meditation has made a big difference.  I am far from an expert and somedays can't quite my thoughts but I will keep doing it and will get better at it.  Besides I am at least teaching my body to relax and get a little rest.  Love my weighted blanket, I do my afternoon meditation under it😊

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

Link to post
Yersinia

Congratulations on the window!! So happy for you that healing is evident too! 

2004 - prozac then wellbutrin (don't recall dosages)

2005 - 150 mg Effexor Rx (or generic equivalent)

April 28, 2021 first day without Effexor after very rapid titration off (probably equivalent to CT).

July 23, 2021 Reinstatement of ~3mg of Venlafaxine ER (~8.9mg of capsule material).

 

50 mg Chelated Magnesium, 4X a day

1000mg DHA+EPA Fish oil 2X day

 

 

Link to post
  • Mentor
Greatful

@Yersinia

Thank you.  And YES it sure does help when for weeks you question your sanity and if you will ever feel better.  This feels like may be I can do this.  I should really go to bed but then who knows what morning will bring.  Do I stay up and savor or do I stay on my schedule and get my rest🙃

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

Link to post
10 hours ago, Greatful said:

I thought I would do a quick update.   I am in a WINDOW. 

This is the best news @Greatful🎉 you deserve this, enjoy every moment of it.  Let me know how you are feeling today.

Been on medication since 1999. Previous medications include Remeron, Zoloft, Celexa, Lexapro, Xanax, Ativan, Valium.

 

Since 3/20 CT’ed MMJ, fast tapered 10mg Lexapro and 2mg Abilify (was on each for about a month) and tapered off 50 mg Amitriptyline. 

 

Klonopin: doses varied since 2001; currently on .5 mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium citrate: 250 mg; Fish oil: 1200 mg

 

“We can not solve our problems with the same level of thinking that created them.”  - Albert Einstein 

 

 

 

Link to post
Yersinia

I have my mantra for the day: “the future will take care of itself.” What do you think? 

2004 - prozac then wellbutrin (don't recall dosages)

2005 - 150 mg Effexor Rx (or generic equivalent)

April 28, 2021 first day without Effexor after very rapid titration off (probably equivalent to CT).

July 23, 2021 Reinstatement of ~3mg of Venlafaxine ER (~8.9mg of capsule material).

 

50 mg Chelated Magnesium, 4X a day

1000mg DHA+EPA Fish oil 2X day

 

 

Link to post
  • Moderator
getofflex
14 hours ago, Greatful said:

I thought I would do a quick update.   I am in a WINDOW.  I just want it on record so when my brain goes haywire again I can look back and see that I am in here somewhere.

How wonderful @Greatful!  I'm very happy for you.  😀

You do a lot of really positive compassionate work on this forum.  Thank you. 

***Please note this is not medical advice.  Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a doctor who understands psych meds and how to withdraw from them, if you can find one.

Lexapro   Started Apr 15 '02 - 10 mg;  Apr 2 '20  0.18 mg; Jul 16  0.17 mg, Aug 23  0.16 mg, Oct 7  0.15 mg, Nov 8 - 0.14, Jan 16 '21 - 0.13, Feb 7 - 0.12, Feb 22 - 0.11, Mar 26 - 0.10, May 21 - 0.09, June 15 - 0.08 Aug 16 - 0.07, Oct 6 - 0.06 

Ibuprofen 800 mg, or Tylenol 1000 mg as needed

other meds: Levothyroxine 75 mg

Trazodone nightly, stopped in late 2019

Xanax on occasion, stopped in late 2019

magnesium in small amounts at breakfast, 3 PM 

suppl AM: fish oil, flax oil, vit C, vit E, calcium

suppl PM: magnesium 350 mg, GABA 750 mg, Estroven, melatonin 2.5 mg

Link to post
  • Mentor
Greatful

@getofflex  Thank you for the kind words.  I think my shades are closing half way on my window.  Short but sweet.  I just hope I don't have to wait weeks until the sweet site of me comes again😞

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

Link to post
  • Moderator
getofflex

I’m sorry. As time goes on the windows get better and the waves less severe. 

***Please note this is not medical advice.  Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a doctor who understands psych meds and how to withdraw from them, if you can find one.

Lexapro   Started Apr 15 '02 - 10 mg;  Apr 2 '20  0.18 mg; Jul 16  0.17 mg, Aug 23  0.16 mg, Oct 7  0.15 mg, Nov 8 - 0.14, Jan 16 '21 - 0.13, Feb 7 - 0.12, Feb 22 - 0.11, Mar 26 - 0.10, May 21 - 0.09, June 15 - 0.08 Aug 16 - 0.07, Oct 6 - 0.06 

Ibuprofen 800 mg, or Tylenol 1000 mg as needed

other meds: Levothyroxine 75 mg

Trazodone nightly, stopped in late 2019

Xanax on occasion, stopped in late 2019

magnesium in small amounts at breakfast, 3 PM 

suppl AM: fish oil, flax oil, vit C, vit E, calcium

suppl PM: magnesium 350 mg, GABA 750 mg, Estroven, melatonin 2.5 mg

Link to post

Hey Greatful,

How was your day today? Were you skipping or clumping 🙃 Or a bit of bipolar ?

You made my morning with your sense of humour, Im. going to use that terminology to explain my days. 

Your a wonderful soul😇

1995 started Paxil 20mg slowly increasing to 50mg until 2014

-2014 I decided to tapper myself not knowing how too and crashed , DR added 50mg Seraquel

-2015 tried tapering again and crashed

Seroquel Taper

2/11/16 43mg  1/09/17  37.5mg  10/03/10 36.25mg. 17/3/19 35mg 26/3/19 33.75mg  4/4/19 32.5mg  21/4/19 30mg

16/7/19 28.75mg  5/8/19 27.5mg. 19/8/19 25mg   4/8/20 23mg 18/8/20 22.5mg  12/10/20 18.25mg  10/1/21 15mg  3/8/21 UPDOSE 16mg

Paxil Taper

2/11/16 40mg 12/10/17 37mg  28/10/17 36mg  10/1/18. 35mg  24/05/18 33mg  28/8/18 31mg 16/12/18 30mg 20/10/19 29mg  17/11/19 28mg 7/1/20  27mg 12/2/20  26mg 7/3 /20 25mg  11/4/20 24mg 4/5/20 23mg  5/6/20 22mg 23/6/20 21mg 15/7/20 20mg

Untitled.rtf

Link to post
  • Mentor
Greatful

@Cheeky  Well I started out limping, than turned into clomping, late this evening I would say a a light skip.  I had a bit of rumination throw into the mix. Yeah, bi polar is another one that pops it's ugly head once and awhile.  I really hate it when my brain feels like it is in high alert and very intense.  Ugh. I dream of the day when I know any emotions , anxiety, low mood, etc are my own emotions not from drugs or drug w/d

 

Your just starting your day,  how is it going? 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

Link to post
1 hour ago, Greatful said:

@Cheeky  Well I started out limping, than turned into clomping, late this evening I would say a a light skip.  I had a bit of rumination throw into the mix. Yeah, bi polar is another one that pops it's ugly head once and awhile.  I really hate it when my brain feels like it is in high alert and very intense.  Ugh. I dream of the day when I know any emotions , anxiety, low mood, etc are my own emotions not from drugs or drug w/d

 

Your just starting your day,  how is it going? 

Yeah I feel you , but that little skip is good even though it didn’t last long. 

Today I feel tired , I think all this aniexty is draining me. I’m in high alert 🚨 looking for danger  when there’s nothing there . This aniexty bring the terrible thoughts of me  never recovering and it just goes on an on worrying about my future . The good thing is I’m better then yesterdayI think 🤔 

1995 started Paxil 20mg slowly increasing to 50mg until 2014

-2014 I decided to tapper myself not knowing how too and crashed , DR added 50mg Seraquel

-2015 tried tapering again and crashed

Seroquel Taper

2/11/16 43mg  1/09/17  37.5mg  10/03/10 36.25mg. 17/3/19 35mg 26/3/19 33.75mg  4/4/19 32.5mg  21/4/19 30mg

16/7/19 28.75mg  5/8/19 27.5mg. 19/8/19 25mg   4/8/20 23mg 18/8/20 22.5mg  12/10/20 18.25mg  10/1/21 15mg  3/8/21 UPDOSE 16mg

Paxil Taper

2/11/16 40mg 12/10/17 37mg  28/10/17 36mg  10/1/18. 35mg  24/05/18 33mg  28/8/18 31mg 16/12/18 30mg 20/10/19 29mg  17/11/19 28mg 7/1/20  27mg 12/2/20  26mg 7/3 /20 25mg  11/4/20 24mg 4/5/20 23mg  5/6/20 22mg 23/6/20 21mg 15/7/20 20mg

Untitled.rtf

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  • Mentor
Greatful

@Cheeky  Just getting up here.   How was your day

 

8 hours ago, Cheeky said:

I’m in high alert 🚨 looking for danger  when there’s nothing there .

You have this too!!!!!  Does it feel like underline panic?  Then I start getting afraid of my thoughts, Searching for why I am so full of fear, start to obsess over things.  Then the vicious cycle starts.   It is a struggle to regain any sort of reasoning. I try and remind myself that they are only thoughts and they can't hurt you. Just acknowledge the thought and don't engage or try reason with it, just let it be there, then distract yourself.

 Besides they are so morphed and very little truth to them.   I think I have read somewhere that your anxiety starts looking for something to pin it on.  Constant state of alertness.  UGH.....

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

Link to post
  • Mentor
Greatful

@Go2zero  Hi,  I wanted to ask you some more about L Theanine.  I  feel a decrease in anxiety when I take it. 

 I am in W/D from several meds.  I decreased my Lamictal from 200mg to 37.5mg last spring rather fast within about 2 months, and ct'd Seroquel after 6 weeks, Zoloft for 1 month 

 Up and down on Trazodone, and Xanax. 

 And Prozac, this is the one that started to whole nightmare last fall. I thought I was doing a slow taper last summer into last fall. Crashed 

 

Should I be worried that I am messing up my recovery by taking L Theanine.  Like I said I general feel better after I take it.

What  happens when you take it long term?

 

I know that it crosses the blood brain barrier, but so does Omega's  

I just want to feel better, You get paranoid about everything you put in your body, what could be hindering your healing, ie   Dairy, processed foods, wheat,  you name it, stay away from this, stay away from that.  It is enough to drive you more crazy then you already feel.

 

Thanks for any help 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

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  • Moderator
Go2zero

Hi Greatful, 

 

This is what I answered to you in the post of @fairygirl:

See the rest of y comment below this copied post!

 

I do not think you should be worried. But I do think one should be careful with supplements like L-Theanine. It has effect on dopamine, serotonin and GABA levels. When we are tapering psychiatric drugs, we want to create a natural balance in our systems again. The body, brain and CNS have to work very hard to find this balance again after all disturbances and changes caused by the meds.

 

Our bodies are so intelligent that we can find this balance again after a period of healing. But the more supplements we use, the more unnatural unbalances we create again. This may hinder our natural healing process.

 

Our CNS and all natural chemical processes in our system are so delicate. So using supplements that have direct effect on these processes are not recommended.

 

There are people who do have positive effect from L-Theanine. I am not saying no one should take it. But lots of people find that these effects disappear after a while (same as with ashagandha for example). And after that often adverse reactions start.... 

 

My personal experience with L-Theanine is that it may help if I just take it now and then (during a few days maximum), when having extreme WD symptoms from bupropion WD. Bupropion does NOT have effect on serotonin  (SSRI's do), but mainly om dopamine. Since L-Theanine has more effect on dopamine than on serotonin, this can give some relief because of dropping dopamine levels when tapering bupropion. But again, I just took it now and then a few days. My experience is that if I took it longer than a few days the positive effects disappeared very soon.

 

Here is a link on SA about L-Theanine. As you can see, the opinions differ a lot...

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/1032-l-theanine-for-anxiety-insomnia/

 

I hope this makes my ideas clear. What I do question is what you are taking on meds. It is not clear to me from your last post if you are still taking lexapro and prozac as well next to all meds you mentioned in your post. 

 

One thing is quite clear to me. The more meds we take, the more complex our healing will be. So adding supplements to that that have direct influence on brain chemistry is not the best idea in my opinion.

 

I have good results with taking essential Lavender oil. I put 2-4 drops in a glass of water and drink it. It most often gives relief in 15-30 minutes. If you want to try, only take 100% pure organic lavender oil. It does not give any side effects. I just take it when needed.

1993    Anafranil (Clomipramine) for a few months. Later in 1993 Paxil for a few months 1993- 2006      No medication

2006   Effexor, Cymbalta, some Benzo’s. All for short periods. Later in 2006 Lexapro (escitalopram) 10 mg and shortly after Wellbutrin XR 150mg, against side effects Lexapro 

Since 2006 until end of 2015: Several times on and off Lexapro and Wellbutrin and several slight dosage changes. Mostly taken dosages: 5mg Lexapro and 150mg Wellbutrin

2016  Dosage change Lexapro from 5mg to 2,5 mg. Wellbutrin stayed om 150mg

November 2016 – April 2017 Down from 2,5mg to 0,6mg Lexapro (in steps) without much problems. Wellbutrin down from 150mg to 66mg. Also without much problems.

April 2017 – March 2019       Lexapro 0,6 mg        April 2017 - August 2018       Wellbutrin in small steps down from 66mg in to 37,5 mg . Quite heavy WD after each step.

March 2019 – May 2019 Lexapro down from 0,6 to 0,3mg then Prozac to 0,6 mg switch because severe discontinuation effects (may also have been from Wellbutrin..)    

Wellbutrin down from 37,5mg to 35,3mg 

October 2019        Seroquel 12,5 mg for 4 weeks because of extreme sleeping problems, then weaning off in 2 weeks       Prozac up dosage to 1,2 mg

March 2020     Wellbutrin in 2 steps down from 35,3mg to 33,3mg   Extreme withdrawal affects during 8 months. Stopped tapering Wellbutrin  until total off Prozac. February 2020 – November 2020   Prozac down in steps from 1,2mg to 0,57mg. 

Jan 2021 Prozac down to:  0,55> 0,53>0,51mg,   Feb 0,47mg ,  Mar 0,42mg,   Apr 0,37, longer hold because of WD symptoms July 0,36 and hold again

 

Supplements: Fish Oil (3000mg), Magnesium 100 mg, 2 drops of Lavender Oil when feeling anxiety. 50mg of L-Theanine when severe discontinuation effects caused by Wellbutrin

 

Please note this is NOT a medical advice. Discuss all your medical issues with a doctor who understands psychical drugs and really knows how to withdraw from them. I wish that you will find one.

Link to post

@Greatfuljust checking in to see how you are feeling today 💖

Been on medication since 1999. Previous medications include Remeron, Zoloft, Celexa, Lexapro, Xanax, Ativan, Valium.

 

Since 3/20 CT’ed MMJ, fast tapered 10mg Lexapro and 2mg Abilify (was on each for about a month) and tapered off 50 mg Amitriptyline. 

 

Klonopin: doses varied since 2001; currently on .5 mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium citrate: 250 mg; Fish oil: 1200 mg

 

“We can not solve our problems with the same level of thinking that created them.”  - Albert Einstein 

 

 

 

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  • Mentor
Greatful

@Mia1 Hi, there 

 Hanging in there.  Some low mood. Heaviness feeling in my body and mind.  I had  a huge wave of obsessing thoughts yesterday afternoon thru this morning.  They really took me in and wouldn't let go. They are still there but I am trying not to engage in them  UGH!  I am guessing that has had something to do with the low mood.   I wonder if it cycles.   I was really fearful and had that underline panic, then the I locked in to the obsessing thoughts and low mood.

 

Went for my walk and took a shower.

 

I am really trying to make eye contact with people when they drive by and wave.  It is really helping me feel connected to people, I am fully engaged in the experience, not shying away like I am a nobody.   I am somebody  Yeah!

 

I have been emotional disconnected since I was young, protecting myself I guess.  My therapist thinks this is good, learning to let people in and to really see me.

 

  Why does retraining your brain take so much work.  I mean really, where is the magic key that opens the lock and lets us out. Chiseling away at the lock takes to long.  I want to live free now 

 

What are your plans for the day? 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

Link to post
1 hour ago, Greatful said:

I had  a huge wave of obsessing thoughts yesterday afternoon thru this morning.  They really took me in and wouldn't let go. They are still there but I am trying not to engage in them  UGH!  I am guessing that has had something to do with the low mood.   I wonder if it cycles. 

This is a familiar symptom for me, I’ve never experienced anything like it before coming off the psych drugs, you? For me it cycles, gets worse when I have extra stress or in a wave. Overall though I think I manage it well and it’s not so much an issue anymore. Until it is 🤣🤪

 

I’ve been doing a lot of “work” on just letting myself be throughout the day. Just reminding myself my brain is in w/d, it can do what it wants and I refocus on what I’m doing. So basically mindfulness but also total acceptance of my over active brain. So I try to be present as much as possible but I’m okay if I can’t be. I used to judge myself A LOT, it created so much of the “what do I do with my symptoms” dialogue. Learning how to be is helping me go deeper into acceptance of them and when I’m in acceptance I don’t focus on them as much.

1 hour ago, Greatful said:

 I was really fearful and had that underline panic,

What do you think is the cause of this fear?

 

1 hour ago, Greatful said:

not shying away like I am a nobody

You are somebody really super special, I’m happy you realize that!!🥰 I say this to you all the time but you really are doing such amazing work on yourself.

 

1 hour ago, Greatful said:

I have been emotional disconnected since I was young, protecting myself I guess.  My therapist thinks this is good, learning to let people in and to really see me.

I have these same issues from childhood, it’s definitely a protective mechanism. And it feels good not to have to hide anymore, even if the process can feel uncomfortable. 

 

2 hours ago, Greatful said:

Why does retraining your brain take so much work.  I mean really, where is the magic key that opens the lock and lets us out. Chiseling away at the lock takes to long.  I want to live free now 

Those programs are embedded deep inside us from childhood. It’s like breaking a 50 year addiction. But repetition and consistency will get us there. I think this is one of those things that the progress is so gradual you can’t really see it as it’s happening. But it’s happening!

 

Never forget you ARE free right now. It’s your mind that’s  telling you you have to be or feel a certain way in order to live your life the way you want. But why? Why can’t you enjoy your day today with w/d symptoms? Why do these symptoms have to have dominion over your mind? They don’t. I know it can feel difficult when we don’t feel well but it’s always true, we’re always free.

2 hours ago, Greatful said:

What are your plans for the day? 

Basically the same as yesterday but I did some cooking and went to the gym. Going to do a guided meditation and read for a bit, maybe find a good movie to watch later. What are you up to?

Been on medication since 1999. Previous medications include Remeron, Zoloft, Celexa, Lexapro, Xanax, Ativan, Valium.

 

Since 3/20 CT’ed MMJ, fast tapered 10mg Lexapro and 2mg Abilify (was on each for about a month) and tapered off 50 mg Amitriptyline. 

 

Klonopin: doses varied since 2001; currently on .5 mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium citrate: 250 mg; Fish oil: 1200 mg

 

“We can not solve our problems with the same level of thinking that created them.”  - Albert Einstein 

 

 

 

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  • Mentor
Greatful
Posted (edited)

@Mia1I did another  E/R  I finally went to get my hair cut.  So yes I will have to agree that I am slooowly healing.  I have been trying to get up the nerve to go for a long time.  I decided today was the day. It felt like I can do this.  It is so hard when you feel so awful to do anything, one foot in front of the other clomp, clomp, clomp.   

 

1 hour ago, Mia1 said:

Why can’t you enjoy your day today with w/d symptoms?

How do you get yourself to move when you feel so awful?  The fatigue and feeling like you have the flu without the fever.  

 

1 hour ago, Mia1 said:

Why do these symptoms have to have dominion over your mind?

I know how they do..... I am fighting it.   It is so hard when you feel so sick emotionally and physically.  I forget to give myself compassion and remind myself I am in W/D.   There is a positive today my anxiety and panic are down. 

 

 So let me recap   You just accept what ever symptom you are having that day.(depression, anxiety, brain malfunction, panic, restlessness, feel just plain awful)( I am secretly worried I will be like this forever......)  I know, I know that's my dysfunctional brain talking.  See I knew there is a reason I talk to you, I get the thoughts and feelings out and then they don't seem as bad.   

 

Do you ever just hit the wall and break down and cry.😰

 

Thank you for reminding me that I am growing and healing.  I can see that I am able to stop myself from going down the whole spiral staircase  I may get down to the middle then grab the railing (yeah meditation and brain work).

It is amazing how quick your brain can go from positive (in a window) to hopelessness (in a wave)

 

 

I am going to go meditate, I will catch up to you later♥️

 

Edited by Greatful

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

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2 hours ago, Greatful said:

am secretly worried I will be like this forever......)  I

Thats me at the moment ☺️

1995 started Paxil 20mg slowly increasing to 50mg until 2014

-2014 I decided to tapper myself not knowing how too and crashed , DR added 50mg Seraquel

-2015 tried tapering again and crashed

Seroquel Taper

2/11/16 43mg  1/09/17  37.5mg  10/03/10 36.25mg. 17/3/19 35mg 26/3/19 33.75mg  4/4/19 32.5mg  21/4/19 30mg

16/7/19 28.75mg  5/8/19 27.5mg. 19/8/19 25mg   4/8/20 23mg 18/8/20 22.5mg  12/10/20 18.25mg  10/1/21 15mg  3/8/21 UPDOSE 16mg

Paxil Taper

2/11/16 40mg 12/10/17 37mg  28/10/17 36mg  10/1/18. 35mg  24/05/18 33mg  28/8/18 31mg 16/12/18 30mg 20/10/19 29mg  17/11/19 28mg 7/1/20  27mg 12/2/20  26mg 7/3 /20 25mg  11/4/20 24mg 4/5/20 23mg  5/6/20 22mg 23/6/20 21mg 15/7/20 20mg

Untitled.rtf

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@Grateful you doing amazing with self help. Im learning a lot from you and @Mia1I trying to do the same but I get side tracked in my negative thoughts.  I think I've downloaded every self help book on the market hoping to get a quick fix. To the day we stablize..........

1995 started Paxil 20mg slowly increasing to 50mg until 2014

-2014 I decided to tapper myself not knowing how too and crashed , DR added 50mg Seraquel

-2015 tried tapering again and crashed

Seroquel Taper

2/11/16 43mg  1/09/17  37.5mg  10/03/10 36.25mg. 17/3/19 35mg 26/3/19 33.75mg  4/4/19 32.5mg  21/4/19 30mg

16/7/19 28.75mg  5/8/19 27.5mg. 19/8/19 25mg   4/8/20 23mg 18/8/20 22.5mg  12/10/20 18.25mg  10/1/21 15mg  3/8/21 UPDOSE 16mg

Paxil Taper

2/11/16 40mg 12/10/17 37mg  28/10/17 36mg  10/1/18. 35mg  24/05/18 33mg  28/8/18 31mg 16/12/18 30mg 20/10/19 29mg  17/11/19 28mg 7/1/20  27mg 12/2/20  26mg 7/3 /20 25mg  11/4/20 24mg 4/5/20 23mg  5/6/20 22mg 23/6/20 21mg 15/7/20 20mg

Untitled.rtf

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rubywednesday
On 7/30/2021 at 10:57 AM, Erell said:

Hello @Greatful

 

I have recently read some of your posts and wanted to share with you how much I appreciate your ability to help others and the ton of your posts.

You really an amazing contributor  in this community.

 

And helping others can sometimes be a great selfcare tip!

Please do take good care of yourself, you deserve it too ❤

 

I do hope you'll feel better soon and send you all my support ☀️

I'll second this @greatful you've been a great help to me too.  Hope you feel better soon

2003 - 2018 Started/stopped lithium, sodium valproate, fluoxetine, venlafaxine, seroxat, citalopram and many more that I can't remember

2018 - 120 mg Duloxetine, 20 mg Olanzapine  2019  - 60 mg Duloxetine, 20 mg Olanzapine  Feb 2020 - Quetiapine - up to 200 mg slow release, 60 mg Duloxetine, reduced Olanzapine to 10 mg

Aug 2020 - Tapered Quetiapine far too fast under GPs advice -  withdrawal symptoms included mood swings, insomnia, anxiety, dizziness (misdiagnosed BPPV), low blood pressure - 60 mg Duloxetine, 10 mg Olanzapine

4 Mar 2021 - failed taper to 5 mg Olanzapine 20 Mar 2021 -  reinstated 10 mg Olanzapine

19 Apr 2021 - 60 mg Duloxetine, 7.5 mg Olanzapine

24 June 2021 - 6.25mg olanzapine, 60mg duloxetine

22 July 2021 - 6.25mg Olanzapine, 50mg Duloxetine

10 August 2021 - 6.25 mg olanzapine, 40 mg Duloxetine

28 August 20216.25 Olanzapine35 mg Duloxetine - low mood/depression, insomnia withdrawal symptoms

26 August 2021 - 5 mg Nitrazepam , previously I took one 3 or 4 weeks ago;  7 October - 5 mg nitrazepam

Other meds/supplements:  solifinacin, loperimide, lutein/zeatheanin,, methyl cellulose, I also have nitrazepam, lorazepam, propranolol - I take rarely  

14 October 2021 stopped - magnesium oxide & B6, menopause tablet.  

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