Anya324 What have I done and how can I fix it

[Anya324]

Hi ladies and gentlemen. My name

is Anya. I’m 40 and I’m in withdrawals from Lexapro. Fun times. 
 

I began taking Lexapro because the psychologist I saw to help me treat my ADD said I was anxious. I disagreed with him and he said “well, the Lexapro will help you with ADD too.” I was 29 and expecting twins (via surrogate) and needed something to focus better. And I believed him. He wasn’t entirely wrong. It did help a bit. That’s why I’ve stayed on it so long. And I’ve learned since that ADD drugs don’t work for me. They make me worse. 
 

Moving on, my history is below in my signature. The story goes that I started at 5 mg increased to 10 mg and then again increase to 20 mg. I did all of this on my own. Later I would tell my doctor and they would just change my prescription when needed refills. Over the course of the last 11 years, I’ve probably had three or four different doctors write the refills for me. None of them questioning why I was taking it or why I was taking so much.  
 

I also have Xanax .25mg that I take as needed for super-stressors, but mostly for sleeping. (It’s always been occasional until recently. Now I’m worried about too that but I have tackle one thing at a time here). 
 

Fast forward to this year. At the end of January I went to my general practitioner for my yearly check up. During which we discussed the fact that I don’t sleep well. He prescribed me trazodone. He suggested that I take 50 mg of a 150 mg tablet. That’s what I did. I fell asleep within 30 minutes. 30 minutes later I woke up and I wanted to crawl out of my skin. I looked up my symptoms (there were several others) and I’m relatively certain that I had an episode of serotonin syndrome. Doctor refused to confirm that 😒. That skin crawling feeling didn’t go away for several weeks from that one dose. I decided that I obviously had too much free-flowing serotonin in my body and I should probably consider reducing the amount of Lexapro it was taking. I discussed this with my doctor and halved my dose to 10 mg.

 

The side effects from reducing my doseage were very much what I anticipated; anger/short fuse, actually feeling emotions, and a tad bit of anxiety. But like, in a good way. Instead of just walking away from a task because it was too difficult (Lexapro) I would actually tackle it so it didn’t nag me. That anger side effect faded pretty quickly, and being able to feel actual emotions follow that. Nothing was so alarming. I don’t feel like I had troop withdrawal syndrome at this point.

 

in April 2021 a friend of mine mentioned how badly her antidepressant made her sweat. I was in SHOCK! Now, when I say I sweat a lot I’m not exaggerating! My bras have permanent sweat stains. My whole body sweats. From the back of my head all the way down to my knee pits. And I live in Florida which means just thinking about going outside equates to me being covered in sweat. Side-note: I may also have some sensory issues with being damp or wet. I had no idea that it was the Lexapro causing all the sweating. When I learned that I immediately contacted my doctor and told him I wanted to come off of the Lexapro completely. He offered me Prozac instead 🤨 and I declined.

 

He then told me how to “properly taper.” 
His instructions were as follows:

Break my 20mg in half and then in half again to equal 5 mg (cringe). Take 5mg for a couple weeks daily. Then reduce to every other day for a couple weeks. Then every 3 days for a couple weeks. Then stop. 
 

I followed directions like a good little girl. What I based my symptoms or ability to switch to the next level off of was the brains zaps. Once they stopped I would reduce. When I got to every three days the brains zaps wouldn’t stop, I could make it past 3 days. One day I popped into the pharmacy and asked the pharmacist if it would be better if I just stopped taking the medicine altogether and let the brains zaps die down over time and she said yes. So that’s what I did. I took my last dose at the end of May early June, I don’t know the exact date.

 

The emotional roller coaster got worse which I anticipated. I don’t love that my emotions are attached to my tear ducts but that’s how it has always been in the past prior to the Lexapro numbing to me so I wasn’t surprised. Some anxieties started to creep up and get worse. The brain zaps eventually subsided third week of June but my sleep got worse around the same time. My appetite also stared to decline around the same now that I think about it. 
 

At the very end of June, the 25th I think, I woke up with my heart racing and feeling very anxious. I got up and started doing things and it went away. Same thing happened the next morning. Then on Monday the 27th I woke up to my heart hammering in my chest and very anxious. We had been out of town and I had ALOT of catching up to do around the house. I wasn’t completely shocked by the anxiety I felt but I didn’t like it one bit. I told my husband I felt like a prisoner. I made an appointment to see my doc on Thursday July 1 because my heart was racing nonstop and the anxiety was worsening. He suggested Prozac. 😡 I declined. He offered me pain meds for my back (idkw but I took them because it’s nice to have on hand). I left.  
 

The past week has been HELL. From Thursday on my heart never slowed. I was averaging 109 bmp. My ability to sleep and eat in non existent.  Last weekend I found this page and a Facebook page and realized that I was in withdrawals and decided to go back on 2.5mg of homemade liquid on Monday (the 5th). I went back to doc on Tuesday to ask for liquid Lex and a beta blocker for the heart palpitations. Guess what he offered me…. Prozac 🤬 I said “no! I do not want to add anything other psychotropics to this mess. Just a beta blocker so my heart doesn’t explode and the liquid so I can restart and stabilize.” He said “ok, we’ll do it your way but if it doesn’t work, we’ll do it my way.” I agreed because I felt like didn’t have a choice but there is no way I’m ever going to another AD.  He gave me my prescription for beta blocker (atenolol 25mg and liquid Lexapro) and I left. I plan to never go back there but finding a new doctor in this town is going to be a challenge. 
 

Anyway… The main reason I’m here until my very long winded story is this. I started 2.5 on Monday and had no reaction whatsoever. Tuesday I took the same dose at the same time, 4pm, and within 90 minutes felt different, better? It’s hard to describe but I definitely knew that I had taken medicine. Tuesday night I fell asleep on the couch at 10:30 and moved into my bedroom and went to sleep around 11:30. I woke up at 1 AM with the worst panic attack I’ve ever had in my life. I had no idea they could be that bad! I took another beta blocker and a half of a Xanax. The panic attack stopped and I went back to bed. But I did not sleep more than 20 minutes at time for the rest of the night. I wake up every time with my heart racing and major anxiety. The morning was awful! I was nervous, shaky heart racing mess. Until 12/1pm and then things get better. 
 

Wednesday I took the medicine at 4pm again went to bed later and still woke up at 1 AM in the midst of another panic attack. Same thing; Xanax, beta blocker, no sleep. Woke up at 7 and asked hubby to go on a walk with me to calm me. It helped but still miserable until around 12/1pm.  
 

Last night (7/8) I decided that I was going to take the Lexapro later (5:30) because when I first take it it makes me very very sleepy but it’s much too early to try to go to bed. I also decided to take a beta blocker before I went to sleep and just use the Xanax if I needed it in the middle of night. I was so sleepy/heavy I couldn’t see straight and by 9:30 I was in bed waiting for hubby to take a shower and get out. Lol. He did, my head hit the pillow and I began to effing panic. “what if I don’t sleep? Why is my heart still hammering? What if I don’t sleep? How am I going to function without sleep? Will the insomnia drive me crazy? Am I gonna end up killing myself?” (side not again: I know 2 people who have killed themselves because of insomnia so there that).  So I decided to try yoga nadra and I relaxed enough to sleep for a bit. When I woke up I was annoyed and angry and frustrated and my heart was racing and in a moment of bad decision making I took a Xanax AND a muscle relaxer. Turned on the tv with a sleep timer and slept for maybe 90 mins. Then I went back to the yoga meditation. 
 

I kept feeling very heavy and gross (from the muscle relaxer, I’m sure) and didn’t want to get out of bed. When I did I felt very panicy and jittery. My legs (quads specifically) are sore. Tylenol doesn’t help. Walking around dulls the pain. My heart is still pounding (not racing because of the beta blockers).  I tried meditation, music, tapping. All help in the moment but the moment I stop the symptoms come back. Then AGAIN at 12/1 the symptoms lessen.
 

Today, I have felt the best since after lunchtime. But I can’t help but wonder if the reinstatement of Lexapro is causing a little bit of kindling? Or hypersensitivity?  I feel heavy, anxious, panic (new since reinstating) can’t sleep, can’t eat and my heart just hammers away for 16 hours after I take it. I do get some relief from the anxiety and heavy feeling from noon until I take it again. And to clarify, the heart pounding never stops. It’s so annoying. 
 

Should I stay on 2.5 or reduce to like 2 or 1.75? Or just wait it out? I want immediate relief but I realize that’s not going to happen. I need a timeline but I’m not gonna get one of those either. 
 

Thanks for taking the time to read this. This was so long. Ugh. 

[Anya324]

I see a red flag thingy but have no idea what I’ve done wrong and why this post isn’t being approved.  I’ve check my member page and see no warnings or messages. Help 😫

[getofflex]

Hello, and welcome to SA.  We are a peer owned and run forum of people who have been or are getting off of psychiatric drugs.  I'm very sorry to hear that you are having these severe symptoms from the psychiatric drugs.  It sounds to me as though you are having both withdrawal from the drug, as well as an adverse reaction to it.  I assume you no longer take the trazodone.  

 

Thank you for giving us your drug signature.  

 

Here is some information about how these drugs actually work.  This will help you understand why you are having the symptoms you are having.  

 

How Psychiatric Drugs Remodel Your Brain

 

 

This helps you understand what withdrawal syndrome is: 

 

 Video on Recovery from Psych Drugs

 

What is Withdrawal Syndrome?

 

It sounds like you doctor tapered you off the Lexapro too fast.  We at SA suggest a very gradual taper of 10% at a time, no more than once every 4 weeks, of the current dose, so that the reduction gets exponentially smaller.  

 

Also, as we are recovering, we suggest keeping things slow, simple, and stable. This is extremely important. 

 

Keep it Simple, Slow, and Stable

 

 

When we recover, there are times of feeling OK mixed in with times of feeling bad.  This is called windows and waves.

 

Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

 

Here are some techniques to cope with symptoms: 

 

Non Drug Ways to Cope with Withdrawal Symptoms

 

 

We don't suggest many supplements, but 2 that many of us find helpful are magnesium and omega-3 fish oil. Here are the links for info about those. It is suggested to add one at a time, and start with a low dose to see how it affects you. 

Magnesium

 

Omega 3 Fish Oil

 

Overall, since you reinstated back to 2.5 mg of Lexapro, do you feel better, worse or the same?  

 

About Reinstating and Stabilizing to Reduce Withdrawal Symptoms

 

I'm going to confer with the other staff here, and one of us will get back to you with a suggestion as to how to proceed.  In the meantime, hang in there, and realize that this is not permanent.  Eventually this will get better.  

[Altostrata]

Welcome, @Anya324

 

What is your current daily drug schedule, with dosages? How often have you taken Xanax in the last 2 weeks?

 

If I were you, I'd reduce to 2mg Lexapro. 

 

Please keep daily notes of times of day you take your drugs, their dosages, and your symptoms throughout the day. We need to know how you feel before and after taking each drug, and your symptoms in between. Post 24 hours of notes at a time in this topic, in a simple list format with time of day on the left and notation (symptom or drug and dosage) on the right. This can show if your symptoms are adverse effects from one of your drugs.

[Anya324]

3 hours ago, Altostrata said:

Welcome, @Anya324

 

What is your current daily drug schedule, with dosages? How often have you taken Xanax in the last 2 weeks?

 

If I were you, I'd reduce to 2mg Lexapro. 

 

Please keep daily notes of times of day you take your drugs, their dosages, and your symptoms throughout the day. We need to know how you feel before and after taking each drug, and your symptoms in between. Post 24 hours of notes at a time in this topic, in a simple list format with time of day on the left and notation (symptom or drug and dosage) on the right. This can show if your symptoms are adverse effects from one of your drugs.

OMG! I feel like  a celebrity is addressing me! Alto, I have read so much on here this past week. Thank you for all you have done and continue doing for people like us!!

 

I cannot say with a great deal of specificity, how much Xanax i've been taking.  It was mostly at night because I was finding sleep really hard to come by.  The most I took was .50 but typically only .25.  This my be sacrilegious to say here but I don't really have any need or desire to cut out xanax.  I appreciate its functionality.  That said, I will no longer use it as a sleep aid. I have read so much on this forum about other natural sleep remedies that I look forward to trying soon.  I tired that magnesium Gylcinate but it made me even more jittery. For now I have been doing Yoga Nidra with decent success.  

 

But here's the GREAT news!!  Yesterday, while awaiting a reply to my intro, I took my meds as usual and after a bit, felt a physical shift in my body.  The heart palpitations became barely noticeable. The crippling anxiety dissolved. I slept. Not like a normal person, but like, more than 20 mins at a time. I woke up at a normal time this morning without any heart racing or anxiety. And I was able to consume nearly 1,000 calories today!

 

I feel new.

 

I know this may just be a window. That a wave my be coming.  But for now, I rejoice! 

 

 

~ 10a      Woke up a little achy; took lansoprazole 30mg, waited 30 mins and ate a muffin! First breakfast I've eaten in a week!!

~ 5:45p  Omega 3 (with dinner)

~ 7:15p   Lexapro 2.5 (no reaction)

~ 11p      Heading to bed

 

 

[Anya324]

And the window closed. At 12:47a 

 

I had a hard time falling asleep. Tossed and turned for awhile. Then sorta dozed for a min and woke up in a panic. Took .25mg Xanax which helped but heart palpitations wouldn’t calm so I took atenolol 25mg. This also helped but now I have that constant undercurrent of anxiety back. And, like, zero sleep. Which makes the panic worse. 
 

is it a good sign that I felt good yesterday? Does that mean I’m doing the right thing with the 2.5mg of lex? Should I just stay the course and ride the waves? 
 

Thank you so much to all of you for your time and consideration here. 
 

anya 

[getofflex]

Anya, can you please give us a complete daily log of your drugs, their dosages, your eating and sleeping patterns, especially specific symptoms before and after taking drugs, etc for a complete 24 hours?  That will really help us.  We need a concise and brief list of what is happening, so we can determine how to help and advise you.  Here is an example:  

 

6 AM woke with anxiety

8 am took 2.5 mg lexapro

10 am stomach is upset

10:30 am ate breakfast

11:35 am got a headache, lasted one hour

12:35 ate lunch

4 pm feel a bit better

5 pm took 2.5 mg lexapro

6 pm ate dinner

9:20 pm headache 

10:00 pm took 50 mg Seroquel

10:30 pm feeling dizzy

10:30 pm fell asleep 

2:30 am woke, took 3 mg Ambien

2:45 am fell asleep

4:30 am woke, but got back to sleep 

 

Also, Altostrata suggested that you reduce your Lexapro to 2.0 mg from 2.5 mg.   She has a lot of experience and has helped many people.  

 

It is a good sign that you had the window.  But we need more information before we can suggest a course of action. Thank you.  

Edited July 11, 2021 by getofflex

[Anya324]

 

 

And the window closed. At 12:47a 

 

I had a hard time falling asleep. Tossed and turned for awhile. Then sorta dozed for a min and woke up in a panic. Took .25mg Xanax which helped but heart palpitations wouldn’t calm so I took atenolol 25mg. This also helped but now I have that constant undercurrent of anxiety back. And, like, zero sleep. Which makes the panic worse. 

 

is it a good sign that I felt good yesterday? Does that mean I’m doing the right thing with the 2.5mg of lex? Should I just stay the course and ride the waves? 

 

Thank you so much to all of you for your time and consideration here. 

 

anya 

 

Here’s my meds time and dose for the past week. 

 

monday

8a Lansoprazole 30mg

Omega 3 (not sure timing)

4:30p Lexapro 2.5mg (homemade)

not sure if I took xanax

little to no sleep

Zero appetite - forced some bites of chicken tenders. 

 

Tuesday

8a Lansoprazole

1:30 Atenolol 25mg (I decided later to half these because 25 makes me feel funny and doesn’t work any better than 12.5) 

Omega3 (time?) 

4p 2.5 Lexapro (homemade) 

Little to no sleep

no appetite - had something for dinner, like 3 bites. Pasta I think. 

 

 

Wednesday 

1am awoke from sleep in a major panic attack. Took .25 Xanax and 12.5 atenolol. 

7:30a Lansoprazole 

9a 12.5 atenolol 

Omega3 

4p Lexapro 2.5 (homemade) 

8a 12.5 atenolol 

11ish .25 Xanax to prevent possible panic attack. 

 

Thursday

1am wake up in the midst of another slightly less intense attack. Took another .25 Xanax

Little to no sleep 

8a Lansoprazole 

8:30a Atenolol 12.5

Omega3 (time?) 

Heart palpitations, anxiety no appetite. Symptoms get better around 1p but not by much. 

5:30p Lexapro pharmaceutical liquid (will no longer notate this)  I decided to bump dose time to see if I there was a correlation to the timing of the lex and the timing of the panic attacks. 

8p atenolol 12.5

10p bed - immediate intrusive thoughts of no sleep and panic attacks. 

Listened to Yoga Nidra and slept for a short time then woke up really pissed and full of anxiety (not panic!) 

 

Friday

2/3am .25 Xanax AND a muscle relaxer. 

8a lansoprazole 

9a Atenolol -Tried to eat a yogurt and actually gagged 

Felt a larger positive shift in all symptoms around 1:30p. This continued to improve over the rest of the day. 
6p had 2/3 protein shake made w/water 

7:30p Lexapro 2.5m

8p Atenolol 

9ish felt another physical shift in symptoms for the better 

10p bed- slept for several hours. Woke up a couple time but ZERO anxiety/panic. 

 

Saturday 

10:30a Lansoprazole 

banana muffin

fried rice 

Felt good, a little achy and heavy/depressed but ZERO anxiety and barely felt heart palpitations. Didn’t take beta blocker 

5:45 Omega3 

lasagna

7:30 Lexapro 2.5 -felt a little fluttery for a moment but it passed. 

11p bed- wide awake. Read, listened to YN, dozed and woke at 12:47a in a panic 

 

Sunday

12:50a .25 Xanax 

3a atenolol 25mg

No sleep

heart palpitations, anxiety, jittery. No appetite  

 

 

 

Edited July 11, 2021 by Anya324
Forgot to add food.

[Anya324]

49 minutes ago, getofflex said:

Also, Altostrata suggested that you reduce your Lexapro to 2.0 mg from 2.5 mg.   She has a lot of experience and has helped many people.  

I saw this but since a had a decent 30 hour window I figured that was a good sign and to leave well enough alone. Also, I didn’t see Altostrata’s reply until after I took the meds again last night. 

[getofflex]

19 hours ago, getofflex said:

 

Overall, since you reinstated back to 2.5 mg of Lexapro, do you feel better, worse or the same?  

 

[Altostrata]

A dose of Lexapro reaches peak plasma in about 5 hours. You are feeling better when it's at a lower level than peak. When it peaks, you feel a surge of activation. Suggest you reduce to 2.0mg Lexapro.

 

Your symptom pattern is obscured by intermittent Xanax and atenolol, which sometimes makes you feel better for a while. You may also be feeling periods of rebound anxiety from Xanax.

 

Also, why are you taking lansoprazole? 

[Anya324]

1 hour ago, getofflex said:

Overall, since you reinstated back to 2.5 mg of Lexapro, do you feel better, worse or the same?  

Better I think. Minus the shear panic feelings that I no control over. 

[Anya324]

1 hour ago, Altostrata said:

A dose of Lexapro reaches peak plasma in about 5 hours. You are feeling better when it's at a lower level than peak. When it peaks, you feel a surge of activation. Suggest you reduce to 2.0mg Lexapro.

 

Your symptom pattern is obscured by intermittent Xanax and atenolol, which sometimes makes you feel better for a while. You may also be feeling periods of rebound anxiety from Xanax.

 

Also, why are you taking lansoprazole? 

I have been taking the lansoprazole for 20 years for acid reflux. Ive tried to stop it so many times but the reflux is sooo bad. BUT! I have learned that I can taper off of it thanks to this site 🤗 I will tackle that in the near future! 

 

After typing up my daily schedule of medicine, sleep, food, emotions etc. and pondering it all morning, I realize there’s a definite pattern. I feel awful between 1 AM and 1 PM and slightly less awful between 1 PM and 1 AM regardless of what time I take my Lexapro.  I am very concerned about reducing my dose now. I asked that question two days ago when I had only taken four doses at 2.5 mg. Now I’ve taken six doses so I’m absolutely terrified that dropping that big of a percentage is going to cause more problems. Do you think that I am kindling? Is that what you mean when you say “surge of activation”? Can we split the difference at 2.25? I’m so scared. 

 

About the Xanax, do you think I’ve taken it often enough that I now have to taper? If not then I can do my very best to work through the panic attacks with EFT (tapping) and yoga in the night. I am willing to try. At this point the only thing the Xanax is good for is the panic attacks. It doesn’t help the anxiety or insomnia so there’s no sense in me taking it and screwing up all the other things. 
 

Thanks y’all. Sorry I have so many questions. 

[Altostrata]

4 minutes ago, Anya324 said:

After typing up my daily schedule of medicine, sleep, food, emotions etc. and pondering it all morning.... I feel awful between 1 AM and 1 PM and slightly less awful between 1 PM and 1 AM regardless of what time I take my Lexapro. 

 

We would very much like to see your daily notes with your drug schedule, detail about when you feel worse, how you feel worse, and when you feel better -- your symptom pattern.

 

6 minutes ago, Anya324 said:

Can we split the difference at 2.25?

 

Sure, if you feel more comfortable with that.

 

6 minutes ago, Anya324 said:

About the Xanax, do you think I’ve taken it often enough that I now have to taper?

 

How often have you taken it in the last 2 weeks?

[Anya324]

17 hours ago, Anya324 said:

I cannot say with a great deal of specificity, how much Xanax i've been taking.  It was mostly at night because I was finding sleep really hard to come by.  The most I took was .50 but typically only .25.  

I cannot remember back 2 full weeks... this has been so hard.  I have basically taken .25 daily (1x) for the past 2-3 weeks at night. A few days the week before I took a daytime .25 because I thought they would help the heart racing but they didn't. I haven't taken a Xanax in the daylight in at least 10 days. Is that helpful? 

 

44 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

We would very much like to see your daily notes with your drug schedule, detail about when you feel worse, how you feel worse, and when you feel better -- your symptom pattern.

I gave a drug schedule a few posts back for almost an entire week. I listed lots of symptoms there.  It's disjointed because my symptoms/reactions don't happen immediately after I take the meds.  Here a synopsis of my symptoms and their timing.  

 

My symptoms are anxious and agitated and jittery (8-9 out of 10) from 1AM- 1PM. The night is always lonely and frustrating because Im not sleeping.  And any time I do fall asleep, when a wake up, my heart is hammering in my chest.  Mornings are always chocked full of anxiety. I have to get out of bed immediately and DO something. 

 

Around 1PM they begin to decline to (6-7 out of 10). The jitteriness dissipates. This is when I feel like I can maybe eat food sometimes. My heart doesn't beat as hard/fast and i feel slightly less agitated. 

 

This has been consistent even before I reinstated the medicine. And Ive moved my dose time but the timing the worst of it isnt changing. Honestly the only negative change since I reinstated (and the reason I signed up to ask questions) is the panic attacks but they have seemed to have become less intense since the first two nights. 

 

And then I had friday afternoon things really started to settle and I felt the old me returning. That lasted about 36hrs. Until nearly 1am this morning.  It always when I fall asleep the first time and then wake up that the panic is there.  I read on here (or a link through here) that when it come to insomnia, sometimes you just have to embrace the not be sleeping. Thats what I'm going to try to do from here on out.  That and Tapping/yoga. 

 

Can you explain to me why, at this point (especially with having had a good 30-36 hour time frame with little to no anxiety, heart racing, panic) that you would suggest a reduction? I feel like a {donkey} questioning you because I know you know all the things but I don't understand the thought/reasoning at this point.  And I'm terrified to make a change a week into the reinstatement based on all the things I've read about picking a point and staying the course.

 

 

[Altostrata]

1 hour ago, Anya324 said:

I have basically taken .25 daily (1x) for the past 2-3 weeks at night. A few days the week before I took a daytime .25 because I thought they would help the heart racing but they didn't. I haven't taken a Xanax in the daylight in at least 10 days. Is that helpful? 

 

Yes, you may be getting rebound anxiety from Xanax during the day, from the dose you took the previous night. Or, it could be the dosage of Xanax you're taking is too high and paradoxically interfering with sleep. We need to continue to see your daily notes, to see if this is happening.

 

You reinstated 2.5mg Lexapro only 6 days ago. It takes about 3-4 days to ramp up to steady-state in your bloodstream. For about a day, the level of Lexapro might have accidentally compensated your withdrawal syndrome without causing activation. Even under the best circumstances, reinstatement might take a while to settle in -- weeks or months rather than days.

 

If you want to stick with 2.5mg Lexapro, we still need to see your daily notes to see what's happening before fine-tuning.

[Anya324]

10 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

If you want to stick with 2.5mg Lexapro, we still need to see your daily notes to see what's happening before fine-tuning.

Does this mean what I provided is insufficient? 
this 🔽

 

9 hours ago, Anya324 said:

 

monday

8a Lansoprazole 30mg

Omega 3 (not sure timing)

4:30p Lexapro 2.5mg (homemade)

not sure if I took xanax

little to no sleep

Zero appetite - forced some bites of chicken tenders. 

 

Tuesday

8a Lansoprazole

1:30 Atenolol 25mg (I decided later to half these because 25 makes me feel funny and doesn’t work any better than 12.5) 

Omega3 (time?) 

4p 2.5 Lexapro (homemade) Felt a little more relaxed for a couple hours after taking meds. 

Little to no sleep

no appetite - had something for dinner, like 3 bites. Pasta I think. 

 

 

Wednesday 

1am awoke from sleep in a major panic attack. Took .25 Xanax and 12.5 atenolol  Felt Heavy, little to no sleep

7:30a Lansoprazole 

9a 12.5 atenolol (slows down heart rate) 

Omega3 

4p Lexapro 2.5 (homemade) again, felt a little calmer for a few hours after taking. And very sleepy.

8a 12.5 atenolol 

11ish .25 Xanax to prevent possible panic attack. 

 

Thursday

1am wake up in the midst of another slightly less intense attack. Took another .25 Xanax

Little to no sleep 

8a Lansoprazole 

8:30a Atenolol 12.5

Omega3 (time?) 

Heart palpitations, anxiety no appetite.

Symptoms get better around 1p but not by much. 

5:30p Lexapro pharmaceutical liquid (will no longer notate this)  I decided to bump dose time to see if I there was a correlation to the timing of the lex and the timing of the panic attacks. Same feeling of relaxation/calm 

8p atenolol 12.5 very sleepy again. 

10p bed - immediate intrusive thoughts of no sleep and panic attacks. 

Listened to Yoga Nidra and slept for a short time then woke up really pissed and full of anxiety (not panic!) 

 

Friday

2/3am .25 Xanax AND a muscle relaxer. 

8a lansoprazole 

9a Atenolol -Tried to eat a yogurt and actually gagged 

Felt a larger positive shift in all symptoms around 1:30p. This continued to improve over the rest of the day. 
6p had 2/3 protein shake made w/water 

7:30p Lexapro 2.5m

8p Atenolol 

9ish felt another physical shift in symptoms for the better 

10p bed- slept for several hours. Woke up a couple time but ZERO anxiety/panic. 

 

Saturday 

10:30a Lansoprazole 

banana muffin

fried rice 

Felt good, a little achy and heavy/depressed but ZERO anxiety and barely felt heart palpitations. Didn’t take beta blocker 

5:45 Omega3 

lasagna

7:30 Lexapro 2.5 -felt a little fluttery for a moment but it passed. 

11p bed- wide awake. Read, listened to YN, dozed and woke at 12:47a in a panic 

 

Sunday

12:50a .25 Xanax 

3a atenolol 25mg

No sleep

heart palpitations, anxiety, jittery. 
 

I added details and made the words bold to emphasize feelings/symptoms. 

[Anya324]

1 hour ago, Altostrata said:

For about a day, the level of Lexapro might have accidentally compensated your withdrawal syndrome without causing activation.

What does the term activation mean? I searched for the word and see it used in other posts but still not clear on its meaning. 

[getofflex]

Activation in this context means that it causes jitteriness, anxiety, or sleeplessness, panic, etc.  In general, SSRI antidepressant drugs, such as Lexapro, tend to be activating. 

[Anya324]

Last night around 10 I felt that physical

shift again. The palpitations subsided, the anxiety and jitters calmed and for the first time in I don’t know how long I slept. From 11-6:30. Woke up several times (like always) to roll over and stuff with ZERO panic or anxiety. 
 

 

[getofflex]

That's great news!  I hope you continue to feel better. 

[getofflex]

@Anya324how have you been doing? 

[Anya324]

I did a lot of reading about waves and windows. I don’t know for certain that that’s where I’m at but it seems that way.  I wish I’d kept better track of when I stopped the meds. I’m starting to think it was later in June than I originally thought. Perhaps that’s why I only suffered for 2-3 weeks and the reinstatement has worked so quickly.  I’ve read way too many horror stories on here and think I’ve gotten off easy. 

 

I’d give today a 5/10.  I went to the kids school and volunteered for 3 hrs even though I just wanted to stay home. I was in my head a lot. And my heart palpitations bug me. They make me restless. 

 

Pretty much the same pattern of 1a-1p feeling crappy and then 1p-1a feeling less crappy. But the crappy is better with each day. And some days are good in that the anxiety and heart palpitations are gone but they’re traded for some depression. I prefer these days tho because I can eat and sleep. 

thanks for checking in 😘

 

[getofflex]

18 hours ago, Anya324 said:

the reinstatement has worked so quickly

I'm so glad to hear that!  The sooner one starts a reinstatement, the better chance that it will work. 

 

18 hours ago, Anya324 said:

I wish I’d kept better track of when I stopped the meds. I’m starting to think it was later in June than I originally thought

Would you mind changing your drug sign to reflect that?  Thanks!  

 

18 hours ago, Anya324 said:

I went to the kids school and volunteered for 3 hrs even though I just wanted to stay home.

I bet the kids liked that.  I'm glad you got yourself out. 

 

18 hours ago, Anya324 said:

But the crappy is better with each day

This is good.  It sounds like the reinstatement is working.  Are you still at 2.5 mg Lexapro? 

[Anya324]

Yes, I’m still on 2.5mg. 
 

Where do I go from here. Do I continue on this low dose or move upwards incrementally until I feel “normal” again? I don’t have a traditional job but I homeschool my daughter and right now there’s no way. I have about a month to get my 💩 together. 
 

(I realize that moving up to a higher dose means it will take me longer to taper off and I’m ok with that. I need my life back. My family needs me. And I need them. Truly) 

[getofflex]

No, we do not suggest you change your dose.  We suggest you stay on this same dose for a good while.  I would stay on it for at least 3 or 4 months, if not longer, if I were you. It sounded like you were in severe WD when you first came in here (couldn't eat or sleep), so your system needs a long time to recover and find it's equilibrium again.  A reinstatement won't make you feel normal, but if it's successful it will reduce the symptoms.  Please be sure and read these links: 

 

Considerations About Stability Stop Jumping Around

 

Keep it Simple, Slow, and Stable

[Anya324]

 

11 hours ago, getofflex said:

Considerations About Stability Stop Jumping Around

I read this whole thread.  I understand and Identify with it.  I am a complete wimp and just want this to be over and back to normal.  I don't want to add in a bunch of new pills/supplements to "fix" all these problems. I just want to increase my dose so that my symptoms of withdrawal are gone. Stay there for 6 months and then reevaluate. 

 

11 hours ago, getofflex said:

It sounded like you were in severe WD when you first came in here (couldn't eat or sleep), so your system needs a long time to recover and find it's equilibrium again.  

All the WD symptoms are still present, just reduced in severity.  With the exception of that one night of 7 hours of sleep, it's been pretty much 30mins of sleep every hour through the night.  My anxiety is better, but still raging just under the surface. Some days I can eat, other days I'm lucky if I consume 200 calories. Since July 1st, Ive lost 10 pounds. (ok, not gonna lie-not mad about this. lol)

 

This is no way to live.  There's no way I can do my job like this. And there's no medical leave when you're a homeschool teacher =(

 

I guess overall I feel like I've hit a plateau that isn't one where I can function normally. 

[MrBamse]

Hi Anya324,

 

I'm sorry what happend to you, it is great that thing are improving now that you've stayed on the same dosage. So wonderful that you've volunteered at school!

 

I've had panic, insomnia and heart issues and they all went away in due time. My anxiety has become very tolrable to the point where it doesn't hinder me much.

 

Also, I see that you're homeschooling after the vacation, I would suggest you work up a plan for eventualities with your SO, friend or a therapist "if that happens, I will do so and so".

[getofflex]

Let me confer with the other mods, and see if a slight increase in your reinstatement would help.  We need to be very careful with reinstatement to avoid kindling.  We will get back with you soon.  

 

 

Edited July 15, 2021 by getofflex

[getofflex]

You can try updosing to 3.5 mg daily.  If it makes you worse drop right back to 2.5.  Good luck.  Prayers and positive thoughts.  

Edited July 15, 2021 by getofflex

[Anya324]

Hey all. I had nearly 3 good days in a row before the wake-up-panics and palpitations came back. Decided to wait till the two week post reinstatement mark to up the dose. Currently at 3.75 as of today. (Splitting the difference to 5 which where I anticipate ending up). 
 

Wondering if it’s okay to take Maxalt or Imatrex for migraines? Or would NyQuil be safer? These headaches are unrelated to withdrawals. They like to tag along with my cycles. I like to take NyQuil for them at night and the maxalt in the morning (makes me a bit edgy, not sleepy). I can feel in starting and I’d to take NyQuil now since it’s bed time but thinking it’s not a great combo. 

[getofflex]

I'm glad to hear that you had the 3 good days, but sorry to hear you are having the panic and palpitations again.  It sounds like the typical non linear (windows and waves) pattern of recovery.  I would suggest that you remain on the 3.75 dose for a while (as in a couple of months at least), unless you feel significantly worse, in which case I suggest you go back to the 2.5 mg dose.  You may not have to updose to 5 mg.  Going back to to high of a dose may result in kindling, which would make your situation worse.   Please read this link carefully, it talks about reinstatement and kindling:  

 

About Reinstating and Stabilizing to Reduce Withdrawal Symptoms

 

Can you please update your sig to reflect this change?  Thank you.  

 

I'll post some quotes of what other moderators on the site have said about these Maxalt and Imitrex: 

 

"Drug information:

 

Sumatriptan, sold under the brand name Imitrex among others, is a medication used to treat migraine headaches and cluster headaches.

 

Rizatriptan, sold under the brand name Maxalt among others, is a medication used for the treatment of migraine headaches".     

 

"Both of these medications directly affect the 5-HT1 receptors and interact badly with SSRIs and SNRIs causing a greatly increased chance of serotonin syndrome. They may not be listed as antidepressants but they work by manipulating serotonin and norepinephrine levels. So need to be treated accordingly."   

 

From the above, it shows that they have an effect on the nervous system.  Personally, if it were me, I would avoid them.  Our nervous systems need as much stability as they can get, and the more substances we add to our system that affects the brain, the more likely it is to destabilize us, and cause more problems with withdrawal symptoms.  I'm sorry, I know migraines are terrible.  I would have to weigh going through the pain of having a migraine versus the misery of going through exacerbated withdrawal symptoms for days or weeks.  You could possibly try a very small partial dose, and see how that affects you with your withdrawal, and take it from there.  

 

Not only that, but you mentioned that you thought you had serotonin syndrome from the one dose of trazodone, which should make us proceed with even more caution.  

 

Nyquil contains an antihistamine.  Here is a thread about antihistamines.  I think this would be less risky that the Maxalt or Imitrex.  

 

Antihistamines for Withdrawal Insomnia

 

 

Edited July 20, 2021 by getofflex

[getofflex]

This is what drugs.com says about taking Maxalt with Lexapro.  

 

Interactions between your drugs

Major

rizatriptan  escitalopram

Applies to: Maxalt (rizatriptan), Lexapro (escitalopram)

Using rizatriptan together with escitalopram can increase the risk of a rare but serious condition called the serotonin syndrome, which may include symptoms such as confusion, hallucination, seizure, extreme changes in blood pressure, increased heart rate, fever, excessive sweating, shivering or shaking, blurred vision, muscle spasm or stiffness, tremor, incoordination, stomach cramp, nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea. Severe cases may result in coma and even death. You should seek immediate medical attention if you experience these symptoms while taking the medications. Talk to your doctor if you have any questions or concerns. Your doctor may already be aware of the risks, but has determined that this is the best course of treatment for you and has taken appropriate precautions and is monitoring you closely for any potential complications. It is important to tell your doctor about all other medications you use, including vitamins and herbs. Do not stop using any medications without first talking to your doctor.

 

 

 

 

This is what it says about taking Imitrex with Lexapro:  

 

Interactions between your drugs

Major

SUMAtriptan  escitalopram

Applies to: Imitrex (sumatriptan), Lexapro (escitalopram)

Using SUMAtriptan together with escitalopram can increase the risk of a rare but serious condition called the serotonin syndrome, which may include symptoms such as confusion, hallucination, seizure, extreme changes in blood pressure, increased heart rate, fever, excessive sweating, shivering or shaking, blurred vision, muscle spasm or stiffness, tremor, incoordination, stomach cramp, nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea. Severe cases may result in coma and even death. You should seek immediate medical attention if you experience these symptoms while taking the medications. Talk to your doctor if you have any questions or concerns. Your doctor may already be aware of the risks, but has determined that this is the best course of treatment for you and has taken appropriate precautions and is monitoring you closely for any potential complications. It is important to tell your doctor about all other medications you use, including vitamins and herbs. Do not stop using any medications without first talking to your doctor.

Edited July 20, 2021 by getofflex

[Anya324]

Can you post the link here change my signature. I can’t figure it out 🤦‍♀️
 

I found this drug interactions site last night. It’s shocking to me how many drugs react with Lexapro. It’s no wonder I had problems. 
 

I plan to hold at 3.75 and if things really balance out I’ll stay. I figure I have to wait a week or more for things to settle in 3.75, right? I expect a surge of the symptoms as before and then relief. 

[getofflex]

7 minutes ago, Anya324 said:

Can you post the link here change my signature. I can’t figure it out 🤦‍♀️
 

Sure.  Click on your name in the upper right corner of the screen.  Select "account settings".  Then, select "signature".  Type it in the box at the bottom, and click "save". 

 

7 minutes ago, Anya324 said:

I plan to hold at 3.75 and if things really balance out I’ll stay. I figure I have to wait a week or more for things to settle in 3.75, right?

Sounds like a decent plan.  Wait a week at the very minimum.  It can take several weeks to even a month or two for a reinstatement to fully settle.  You may not get full relief, as in no symptoms, but you should get a reduction in the symptoms.  This link explains about WD Normal:  

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/17647-tao-of-the-brassmonkey/?do=findComment&comment=392566

 

 

[Anya324]

I changed my signature to reflect the medicine changes I’ve made. 
 

I feel new. Bumping up helped immensely. I do however feel like 3.5 is sufficient so I backed the dose down from 3.75. I was trying to split the difference because I expected to need to jump to 5mg after 2 more weeks but now I don’t believe that will be the case. I honestly still believe that reinstatement worked quickly for me because I hadn’t been off the meds long. 

 

Before I tackle the slow taper with Lexapro again, I’d like to get off the lansoprazole. Going to look into a proper taper for that because the Gastrenterologist gave me the same misinformation for that as my GP did for the Lex. 😭🤦‍♀️
 

 

Thank you all for what you’re doing here. If I hadn’t found this page 3 weeks ago…. Well… Just know that y’all saved at least one life.