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Kat66: should I reinstate or plough on drug free?


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Thanks @Greatful I’ll check it out. Just finished watching Medicating Normal. Have you seen it?

History of depression and anxiety

 

Drugs; Venlafaxine 1998-1999, Prozac 2006-2007, Sertraline 50mg 2013-15, cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg 2015

Citalopram 20mg 2015-2021 (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019

Dropped from 20mg to 10mg early 2021 and stopped completely 25th June 2021

Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my seratonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp. Stopped 5htp 11th July, with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg/day. Reinstated cit at 1mg/day 16/7/21. Increased dose to 2mg/day 2/8/21. Multiple unsuccessful attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle, moderate drinker. Other medications; cliovance (HRT)

Other supplements; magnesium glycinate and calcium

 

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Hi Kat,    it is really up to you what you do with the information and advice that we give. The consequences of your actions are going to be suffered by you and only you. We can say we are s

Thanks @Onmyway, I have now gone three nights without alcohol and gone up to 2mg citalopram. I’m not craving a drink which is what I was really worried about. I’m also taking more magnesium glycinate

I completely understand @Altostrata I will do better. It’s a tough habit to break but I can do it. I never thought WD would get this tough but it’s becoming clear to me now that this process is not to

  • Mentor
Greatful

@Kat66  Is it on youtube or tv?

how are you doing today.

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

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17 hours ago, Greatful said:

@Kat66  Is it on youtube or tv?

how are you doing today.

 

You need to buy a ticket to watch it. $7, not too bad.

https://medicatingnormal.com/ 

 

I’m very tired today and feel rather peculiar, it feels like an inner restlessness, which is odd considering how knackered I am. Weird. Still got the irritability and utter indifference to everything and lack of motivation. Wondering whether to go up to 3mg from 2mg…

 

History of depression and anxiety

 

Drugs; Venlafaxine 1998-1999, Prozac 2006-2007, Sertraline 50mg 2013-15, cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg 2015

Citalopram 20mg 2015-2021 (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019

Dropped from 20mg to 10mg early 2021 and stopped completely 25th June 2021

Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my seratonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp. Stopped 5htp 11th July, with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg/day. Reinstated cit at 1mg/day 16/7/21. Increased dose to 2mg/day 2/8/21. Multiple unsuccessful attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle, moderate drinker. Other medications; cliovance (HRT)

Other supplements; magnesium glycinate and calcium

 

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I'm finding I'm struggling to read and understand a lot of what I'm...well...trying to read and understand. I have no attention span and have to read things over and over again and sometimes just give up as none of it's going in! Very frustrating as there's so much on here I want to read!

 

Plus I snapped at my husband and he jokingly texted me 'how do I get out of this chicken sh*t marriage' which has sent me into a spiral of worrying, even though he's definitely joking, it's like my brain has read that and decided that's what he wants and no rational amount of thought can change it. Basically if anything happens to slightly unbalance things in my mind, my reaction is EXTREME!

History of depression and anxiety

 

Drugs; Venlafaxine 1998-1999, Prozac 2006-2007, Sertraline 50mg 2013-15, cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg 2015

Citalopram 20mg 2015-2021 (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019

Dropped from 20mg to 10mg early 2021 and stopped completely 25th June 2021

Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my seratonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp. Stopped 5htp 11th July, with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg/day. Reinstated cit at 1mg/day 16/7/21. Increased dose to 2mg/day 2/8/21. Multiple unsuccessful attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle, moderate drinker. Other medications; cliovance (HRT)

Other supplements; magnesium glycinate and calcium

 

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  • Mentor
Greatful

@Kat66

2 hours ago, Kat66 said:

I’m very tired today and feel rather peculiar, it feels like an inner restlessness, which is odd considering how knackered I am

 

the inner restlessness is the pits.  How do you relax and rest when you feel so awful then your body and mind say you have to move..........😆

Can you concentrate to watch tv?  I try to but  I get over sensitized.  I get so bored.........😵

 

I am feeling disconnect from myself,  I guess a little D/R. I am so sick of the panic, I can't  think I can't think,, feeling.  I sure would be nice to have a small window with no anxiety, panic, low mood and get some brain clarity......

 

Are you seeing any change in your symptoms?   I see some little ones.  I would say a5% - 10% healing from when I started.  Not near enough but I guess I have to accept any little bit I get. 

Look down deep and find the strength to beat these drugs‼️

 

Hang in there, all we have to do is make it through today❤️

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

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32 minutes ago, Greatful said:

@Kat66

the inner restlessness is the pits.  How do you relax and rest when you feel so awful then your body and mind say you have to move..........😆

Can you concentrate to watch tv?  I try to but  I get over sensitized.  I get so bored.........😵

 

It's virtually impossible to relax when this weird restlessness happens, not even TV helps because, well, you nailed it, you get oversensitised. I can't settle to anything. And YESSSSS, I can so relate to the boredom!!! Isn't it weird? I know I could do a million things but nothing satisfies so you end up BORED!!

 

35 minutes ago, Greatful said:

@Kat66

I am feeling disconnect from myself,  I guess a little D/R. I am so sick of the panic, I can't  think I can't think,, feeling.  I sure would be nice to have a small window with no anxiety, panic, low mood and get some brain clarity......

 

Totally agree. Yes I get the disconnect a lot. Disconnected from the world in general. You sound like you're in a really horrible wave right now. Sucks doesn't it?

36 minutes ago, Greatful said:

@Kat66

Are you seeing any change in your symptoms?   I see some little ones.  I would say a5% - 10% healing from when I started.  Not near enough but I guess I have to accept any little bit I get. 

Look down deep and find the strength to beat these drugs‼️

 

 

Yes, maybe a slight dialling down of the extreme rage I was getting a couple of months ago. Now I won't shout 'you stupid %$&^£' at screaming pitch, I'll just mutter it to myself when I'm in the car and someone does something stupid. So I suppose that's something! You've noticed 5-10% healing, that sounds good - when did you start tapering?

History of depression and anxiety

 

Drugs; Venlafaxine 1998-1999, Prozac 2006-2007, Sertraline 50mg 2013-15, cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg 2015

Citalopram 20mg 2015-2021 (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019

Dropped from 20mg to 10mg early 2021 and stopped completely 25th June 2021

Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my seratonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp. Stopped 5htp 11th July, with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg/day. Reinstated cit at 1mg/day 16/7/21. Increased dose to 2mg/day 2/8/21. Multiple unsuccessful attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle, moderate drinker. Other medications; cliovance (HRT)

Other supplements; magnesium glycinate and calcium

 

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  • Mentor
Greatful

@Kat66

43 minutes ago, Kat66 said:

Yes, maybe a slight dialling down of the extreme rage I was getting a couple of months ago.

That's huge, control that rage is really hard anyway then add on not feeling good and frustration.  You don't seems as frantic as you did awhile ago either.  That is a good sign that things are moving in the right direction.  I sounds like you are lot like me and have a hard time with patience? 😆  That is another thing we get  to  learn😏

 

  I started this journey tapering my Prozac.  Start it a year ago June.  Functioned through the summer with what I know now the start of WD.  Then the fun really began last  December.  It's been one fun ride since.🥴

If there is anything positive from this horrendous experience, I am forced to work on myself and hopefully when the fun is over I will be healed inside and out so I can live life drug free.😚We have hit rock bottom and now we have to dig our way out.  We truly have to look to ourselves and who we are.  We can't rely on the drugs to help us cope with life anymore.

 

So let's draw strength from each other, everyone on this form and beat these drugs and show the doctors what we really are made of💪

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

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20 hours ago, Greatful said:

@Kat66

That's huge, control that rage is really hard anyway then add on not feeling good and frustration.  You don't seems as frantic as you did awhile ago either.  That is a good sign that things are moving in the right direction.  I sounds like you are lot like me and have a hard time with patience? 😆  That is another thing we get  to  learn😏

 

I might be the world's least patient person! I think when you say I'm not quite as frantic, thing's may be settling down into a new WD normal. I'm just getting used to life the way it is now. Just plod through each day dealing with the usual symptoms and just getting used to them. It doesn't take much to tip me over into feeling overwhelmed though. Guess we just have to do a day at a time and be gentle with ourselves eh?

20 hours ago, Greatful said:

Then the fun really began last  December.  It's been one fun ride since.🥴

 

What happened in December?

I'm so glad we have this place to vent and feel less alone xx

History of depression and anxiety

 

Drugs; Venlafaxine 1998-1999, Prozac 2006-2007, Sertraline 50mg 2013-15, cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg 2015

Citalopram 20mg 2015-2021 (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019

Dropped from 20mg to 10mg early 2021 and stopped completely 25th June 2021

Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my seratonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp. Stopped 5htp 11th July, with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg/day. Reinstated cit at 1mg/day 16/7/21. Increased dose to 2mg/day 2/8/21. Multiple unsuccessful attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle, moderate drinker. Other medications; cliovance (HRT)

Other supplements; magnesium glycinate and calcium

 

Link to post

I've suddenly noticed my thinking is getting very very distorted. I'm developing quite a bit of paranoia and negativity towards other people, like the grumpiness is mutating into something more sinister. I had a tendency towards distorted thinking before all this but this is like that but on STEROIDS!!! This WD is basically taking all my previous depression and anxiety symptoms and putting them through a megaphone.

History of depression and anxiety

 

Drugs; Venlafaxine 1998-1999, Prozac 2006-2007, Sertraline 50mg 2013-15, cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg 2015

Citalopram 20mg 2015-2021 (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019

Dropped from 20mg to 10mg early 2021 and stopped completely 25th June 2021

Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my seratonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp. Stopped 5htp 11th July, with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg/day. Reinstated cit at 1mg/day 16/7/21. Increased dose to 2mg/day 2/8/21. Multiple unsuccessful attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle, moderate drinker. Other medications; cliovance (HRT)

Other supplements; magnesium glycinate and calcium

 

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  • Mentor
Greatful

@Kat66  That was the drug when the drug merry-go-round started.  

It is hard to remember what all went on when....I was crashing the end of November and because my doctor and I didn't know what we were doing, we started Zoloft in December. I think I was still on 3mg Prozac,  we should have upped the Prozac a little.  Zoloft didn't work, so on the drug merry- go-round nightmare....

The sad thing is I had joined SA back in November, but for some reason I must not have explored it.  I didn't even do a introductory,  I just joined and forgot about it I guess.  Just think of all the mistakes that could have been avoided.... 

 

2 minutes ago, Kat66 said:

I've suddenly noticed my thinking is getting very very distorted. I'm developing quite a bit of paranoia and negativity towards other people,

You got that right.  It is very hard for me to spend much time around people.  I almost have a social anxiety.  It is good that you realize that your thoughts are very distorted and everything including neuro emotions are morphed.  They can seem so real and scary at times....

15 minutes ago, Kat66 said:

I'm so glad we have this place to vent and feel less alone xx

We you a little nervous when the SA was not coming on line earlier🤢 Talk about thousands of people lost and terrified if we didn't have this site😥

 

Clomp, Clomp, Clomp, on step at a time🚶‍♀️

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

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40 minutes ago, Greatful said:

 I think I was still on 3mg Prozac,  we should have upped the Prozac a little.  Zoloft didn't work, so on the drug merry- go-round nightmare....

 

So you were on two ADs? Nightmare. 

 

41 minutes ago, Greatful said:

 

It is good that you realize that your thoughts are very distorted and everything including neuro emotions are morphed.  They can seem so real and scary at times....

 

I guess it's good to be self aware that they're not normal emotions - doesn't make them any less scary though eh?

 

YES, I was so freaked out earlier when it said 'your community is not available' then said 'contact the owner of the site' - hmmmm yeah. I don't happen to have Alto's personal email or anything!

History of depression and anxiety

 

Drugs; Venlafaxine 1998-1999, Prozac 2006-2007, Sertraline 50mg 2013-15, cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg 2015

Citalopram 20mg 2015-2021 (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019

Dropped from 20mg to 10mg early 2021 and stopped completely 25th June 2021

Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my seratonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp. Stopped 5htp 11th July, with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg/day. Reinstated cit at 1mg/day 16/7/21. Increased dose to 2mg/day 2/8/21. Multiple unsuccessful attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle, moderate drinker. Other medications; cliovance (HRT)

Other supplements; magnesium glycinate and calcium

 

Link to post
  • Mentor
Greatful

@Kat66  We quit prozac and tried zoloft.   dumb, dumb, dumb

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

Link to post

Hey Kat66,

how bad was it when the site went down, I thought I would be lost forever. 
how you holding up? This is so hard and can make you doubt everything. Are you working ?

1995 started Paxil 20mg slowly increasing to 50mg until 2014

-2014 I decided to tapper myself not knowing how too and crashed , DR added 50mg Seraquel

-2015 tried tapering again and crashed

Seroquel Taper

2/11/16 43mg  1/09/17  37.5mg  10/03/10 36.25mg. 17/3/19 35mg 26/3/19 33.75mg  4/4/19 32.5mg  21/4/19 30mg

16/7/19 28.75mg  5/8/19 27.5mg. 19/8/19 25mg   4/8/20 23mg 18/8/20 22.5mg  12/10/20 18.25mg  10/1/21 15mg  3/8/21 UPDOSE 16mg

Paxil Taper

2/11/16 40mg 12/10/17 37mg  28/10/17 36mg  10/1/18. 35mg  24/05/18 33mg  28/8/18 31mg 16/12/18 30mg 20/10/19 29mg  17/11/19 28mg 7/1/20  27mg 12/2/20  26mg 7/3 /20 25mg  11/4/20 24mg 4/5/20 23mg  5/6/20 22mg 23/6/20 21mg 15/7/20 20mg

Untitled.rtf

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12 hours ago, Cheeky said:

Hey Kat66,

how bad was it when the site went down, I thought I would be lost forever. 
how you holding up? This is so hard and can make you doubt everything. Are you working ?

It was scary that's for sure. Yes I'm working part time, 12 hours a week. I'm struggling a bit today to be honest. You're right it does make you doubt everything. Yourself, and your ability to do anything. I just want to be away from everyone because I'm such a horrible grumpy irritable unpleasant person to be around, it's easier if I'm on my own as much as possible. 

History of depression and anxiety

 

Drugs; Venlafaxine 1998-1999, Prozac 2006-2007, Sertraline 50mg 2013-15, cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg 2015

Citalopram 20mg 2015-2021 (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019

Dropped from 20mg to 10mg early 2021 and stopped completely 25th June 2021

Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my seratonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp. Stopped 5htp 11th July, with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg/day. Reinstated cit at 1mg/day 16/7/21. Increased dose to 2mg/day 2/8/21. Multiple unsuccessful attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle, moderate drinker. Other medications; cliovance (HRT)

Other supplements; magnesium glycinate and calcium

 

Link to post
21 hours ago, Greatful said:

@Kat66  We quit prozac and tried zoloft.   dumb, dumb, dumb

What, suddenly quit CT and went straight onto Zoloft?

History of depression and anxiety

 

Drugs; Venlafaxine 1998-1999, Prozac 2006-2007, Sertraline 50mg 2013-15, cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg 2015

Citalopram 20mg 2015-2021 (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019

Dropped from 20mg to 10mg early 2021 and stopped completely 25th June 2021

Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my seratonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp. Stopped 5htp 11th July, with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg/day. Reinstated cit at 1mg/day 16/7/21. Increased dose to 2mg/day 2/8/21. Multiple unsuccessful attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle, moderate drinker. Other medications; cliovance (HRT)

Other supplements; magnesium glycinate and calcium

 

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My cognitive skills/ability to concentrate are getting worse, I am losing interest in life (not suicidal just cannot be bothered with anything any more) and have had a few short rage attacks today (spoke too soon saying they'd subsided!), but I am now 100% alcohol free and determined to stay that way.

So it's a laugh a minute, as per usual!

History of depression and anxiety

 

Drugs; Venlafaxine 1998-1999, Prozac 2006-2007, Sertraline 50mg 2013-15, cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg 2015

Citalopram 20mg 2015-2021 (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019

Dropped from 20mg to 10mg early 2021 and stopped completely 25th June 2021

Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my seratonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp. Stopped 5htp 11th July, with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg/day. Reinstated cit at 1mg/day 16/7/21. Increased dose to 2mg/day 2/8/21. Multiple unsuccessful attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle, moderate drinker. Other medications; cliovance (HRT)

Other supplements; magnesium glycinate and calcium

 

Link to post
7 hours ago, Kat66 said:

It was scary that's for sure. Yes I'm working part time, 12 hours a week. I'm struggling a bit today to be honest. You're right it does make you doubt everything. Yourself, and your ability to do anything. I just want to be away from everyone because I'm such a horrible grumpy irritable unpleasant person to be around, it's easier if I'm on my own as much as possible. 

Yeah it would be easier if we were left alone to heal . We do need support though.

1995 started Paxil 20mg slowly increasing to 50mg until 2014

-2014 I decided to tapper myself not knowing how too and crashed , DR added 50mg Seraquel

-2015 tried tapering again and crashed

Seroquel Taper

2/11/16 43mg  1/09/17  37.5mg  10/03/10 36.25mg. 17/3/19 35mg 26/3/19 33.75mg  4/4/19 32.5mg  21/4/19 30mg

16/7/19 28.75mg  5/8/19 27.5mg. 19/8/19 25mg   4/8/20 23mg 18/8/20 22.5mg  12/10/20 18.25mg  10/1/21 15mg  3/8/21 UPDOSE 16mg

Paxil Taper

2/11/16 40mg 12/10/17 37mg  28/10/17 36mg  10/1/18. 35mg  24/05/18 33mg  28/8/18 31mg 16/12/18 30mg 20/10/19 29mg  17/11/19 28mg 7/1/20  27mg 12/2/20  26mg 7/3 /20 25mg  11/4/20 24mg 4/5/20 23mg  5/6/20 22mg 23/6/20 21mg 15/7/20 20mg

Untitled.rtf

Link to post

Hey Kat, im currently reinstating prozac right now, I was just wondering how your reinstatement has worked over the last few weeks?

7/10/2017 prozac titrated up to 20mg

25/6/2018 Fully off prozac after weening

15/11/2018 trintilix 5mg

15/1/2019 prozac 10mg

15/5/2019 prozac 20mg

15/7/2019 prozac 30mg

15/11/2019 prozac 20mg

15/11/2020 prozac 20mg abilify 2mg

Weening off and then reinstating:
15/4/2021:  Increased prozac and decreased abilify to ease withdrawals. 1mg abilify 25mg prozac. (30mg prozac and no abilify one day, and 20mg prozac and 2mg abilify the next day)

1/5/2021: weaned of prozac from 25mg went down to 20mg 15/5/2021: Went to 15mg prozac (20mg one day, 10mg the next day) 30/5/2021: 10mg prozac everyday 14/6/2021: 5mg prozac everyday (10mg every other day) 25/6/2021: no more pills

16/8/2021: reinstated 1mg prozac daily 26/8/2021: increased to 2mg prozac daily 1/9/2021: increased to 10mg prozac daily. After 5 days massive improvement and after 1-2 weeks withdrawals almost entirely gone!

Link to post
12 hours ago, Colton said:

Hey Kat, im currently reinstating prozac right now, I was just wondering how your reinstatement has worked over the last few weeks?

Hi Colton I restarted on 1mg in mid July then went up to 2mg earlier this month. I still have a lot of symptoms, so am wondering if I should go up to 3mg. But the symptoms have stabilised a bit, so even though things are still unpleasant there aren’t any extreme spikes or anything. It’s only been a month though. I see that you’ve only just reinstated 1mg, how’s it going?

History of depression and anxiety

 

Drugs; Venlafaxine 1998-1999, Prozac 2006-2007, Sertraline 50mg 2013-15, cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg 2015

Citalopram 20mg 2015-2021 (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019

Dropped from 20mg to 10mg early 2021 and stopped completely 25th June 2021

Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my seratonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp. Stopped 5htp 11th July, with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg/day. Reinstated cit at 1mg/day 16/7/21. Increased dose to 2mg/day 2/8/21. Multiple unsuccessful attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle, moderate drinker. Other medications; cliovance (HRT)

Other supplements; magnesium glycinate and calcium

 

Link to post
  • Mentor
Greatful

@Kat66  How are you doing?  Thanks for the encouragement on my thread.  

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

Link to post
  • Mentor

@Kat66

 

 

 

 

On 8/27/2021 at 11:29 AM, Kat66 said:

My cognitive skills/ability to concentrate are getting worse, I am losing interest in life (not suicidal just cannot be bothered with anything any more)

Hang in there.  That is tough.  When I came home from my half a trip  I sunk into a a don't care about anything....I wasn't interested posting on here, nothing just hit the wall.  I hope that you are doing okay( I know stupid question).  

 

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

Link to post

Hi @Greatful I’m on holiday in Scotland at the moment which is proving a welcome tonic and my symptoms have subsided a bit. I’m dreading going home though because that inevitably means back to how I was before Scotland!  

History of depression and anxiety

 

Drugs; Venlafaxine 1998-1999, Prozac 2006-2007, Sertraline 50mg 2013-15, cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg 2015

Citalopram 20mg 2015-2021 (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019

Dropped from 20mg to 10mg early 2021 and stopped completely 25th June 2021

Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my seratonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp. Stopped 5htp 11th July, with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg/day. Reinstated cit at 1mg/day 16/7/21. Increased dose to 2mg/day 2/8/21. Multiple unsuccessful attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle, moderate drinker. Other medications; cliovance (HRT)

Other supplements; magnesium glycinate and calcium

 

Link to post

I am back from Scotland and as predicted things have gone back to nightmare level. I had moments in Scotland where I was quite relaxed and felt almost normal. I can’t believe how bad things are again. Off the scale anxiety with both physical and mental symptoms, and anger/irritability plus lack of motivation, very poor self image verging on self loathing. I’m still at 2mg citalopram and am guessing I’ll just have to sit it out however long it takes. 

History of depression and anxiety

 

Drugs; Venlafaxine 1998-1999, Prozac 2006-2007, Sertraline 50mg 2013-15, cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg 2015

Citalopram 20mg 2015-2021 (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019

Dropped from 20mg to 10mg early 2021 and stopped completely 25th June 2021

Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my seratonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp. Stopped 5htp 11th July, with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg/day. Reinstated cit at 1mg/day 16/7/21. Increased dose to 2mg/day 2/8/21. Multiple unsuccessful attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle, moderate drinker. Other medications; cliovance (HRT)

Other supplements; magnesium glycinate and calcium

 

Link to post
  • Mentor

@Kat66  It is tough when you get a little break and feel some sanity return.  I am in a weird spot,  feeling disconnected with SA, melancholy and some fading in and out of fear. 

Do you think you need some distractions?  I have been going for drives sometimes listening to piano music, sometimes I'll drive  to the store for one or two things (go to one not close to you), just to get out and pass the time. Drive to a park that is a ways away and go for a walk.   The saying around here is time is the key factor in getting through this.  Of course acceptance, meditation, not getting stuck in the thought spiral, going for walks.  Little thing to do throughout the day to break it up. I know it is hard to do when you  don't have any interest but you have to just do it and generally it will ease some of your symptoms.

Are you still working on your bedroom?  My bathroom is still a work in progress.  Braking it down and doing a little bit at a time.  

Are you taking your magnesium once a day?  Split it up over the course of the day, I take about 50mg 3 to 4 times a day.  Have you tried chamomilla tea?  I know it is hard to know what is going to help, but try it and see.  

 

My heart is with you❤️

  

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

Link to post
24 minutes ago, Greatful said:

 feeling disconnected with SA

 

How come you're feeling disconnected from SA?

 

35 minutes ago, Greatful said:

 

Do you think you need some distractions?  I have been going for drives sometimes listening to piano music, sometimes I'll drive  to the store for one or two things (go to one not close to you), just to get out and pass the time. Drive to a park that is a ways away and go for a walk.   The saying around here is time is the key factor in getting through this.  Of course acceptance, meditation, not getting stuck in the thought spiral, going for walks.  Little thing to do throughout the day to break it up. I know it is hard to do when you  don't have any interest but you have to just do it and generally it will ease some of your symptoms.

Are you still working on your bedroom?  My bathroom is still a work in progress.  Braking it down and doing a little bit at a time.  

Are you taking your magnesium once a day?  Split it up over the course of the day, I take about 50mg 3 to 4 times a day.  Have you tried chamomilla tea?  I know it is hard to know what is going to help, but try it and see.  

 

My heart is with you❤️

  

I do need distractions but find that 1/ my attention span is around a minute and  2/ nothing much satisfies, apart from soaps on TV which briefly take me to a different place! You're right though, we just have to keep going, taking the day in little chunks and keeping going with our meditation, acceptance etc. My decoration projects have ground to a halt due to lack of motivation. I'm guessing you might be having the same issues with your bathroom? I take all my mag in the morning, does splitting it up throughout the day increase its effectiveness? I haven't tried chamomile tea, does it work for you? I drink lemon balm tea sometimes. I'm not sure what would really work against the kind of supercharged anxiety I've got. I sometimes wish I had some valium to get some instant relief but I know that's a no no!

History of depression and anxiety

 

Drugs; Venlafaxine 1998-1999, Prozac 2006-2007, Sertraline 50mg 2013-15, cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg 2015

Citalopram 20mg 2015-2021 (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019

Dropped from 20mg to 10mg early 2021 and stopped completely 25th June 2021

Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my seratonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp. Stopped 5htp 11th July, with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg/day. Reinstated cit at 1mg/day 16/7/21. Increased dose to 2mg/day 2/8/21. Multiple unsuccessful attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle, moderate drinker. Other medications; cliovance (HRT)

Other supplements; magnesium glycinate and calcium

 

Link to post
  • Mentor

@Kat66

2 hours ago, Kat66 said:

How come you're feeling disconnected from SA?

I am not sure how to answer that.  I suppose I am in the blah stage right now.  I feel drained and I don't have much to give.  Does that make sense?    Hubby thinks it is just a stage right now and that I will come back around.  I am still going to be on it, I just feel overwhelmed sometimes with so many of us in pain and dysfunction.  There are days were I can't hardly comprehend the destruction the  meds  have put my brain and my life  in...... So I will keep reaching out and getting support from the only ones who really can understand, and give it out in return.  Hubby is wonderful but it's like anything in life unless you experience it you are in the dark.  He can see all the pain I am in and it hurts him.

 

 

 

2 hours ago, Kat66 said:

My decoration projects have ground to a halt due to lack of motivation.

I try and get out for a walk sometime in the morning, sometimes it will motive me to work on something for a little while....Even if you have a short attention span, have several things small things you can  do.

Walk in the morning, maybe a larger project, play on table for a little while, lunch. meditate, run out, watch a little tv, of course spend sometime on SA maybe a couple of times a day, supper, tablet , meditate, tablet, bed time.  Remember you are trying to get through the day, so you will be a day closer to feeling better.  Some days it is like pulling teeth to get up I know.

Movement like walking and moving around the house will help with the anxiety.  

Have you ever tried to just sit in anxiety and connect with it?  Really it is just a sensation in your body.  Listen to it,  what does it feel like to you?  Where is it located?  You know that it will never hurt you and that it will only get to a certain point of tenseness and then is it.  It is kind of a interesting thing, anxiety, we feel we have to out run it because it is so uncomfortable, but why is it uncomfortable?  If you had a aching leg any other body sensation would you feel you have to run from it. 

Many here on SA read Claire Weeks "Hope and Help for Your Nerves"  You can also look her up on youtube.   

 

I was laughing about my trips to the store to get out and the gas I am wasting. Today I drove about 15 miles just to get like 4 things.  There is a store 5 miles away from where we live.  He's like so what, it gets you out and passes the time for you. 

Chatting with you and others helps too.

 

2 hours ago, Kat66 said:

I take all my mag in the morning, does splitting it up throughout the day increase its effectiveness? I haven't tried chamomile tea, does it work for you?

I have 100mg capsule of Mag.  I pull apart one and pour half the powder into water and drink it, I do this about 4 times a day so  I am getting 200mg mag a day.  yes it does help.  It generally will ease some of the anxiety.  The tea seem to help too.   I can relate to the valium.  I am on a very tiny dose of xanax 3 times a day,  I was really panicked for about 2 weeks and I kept thinking about taking more xanax.  Just a thought though, I never did.  I want off all this garbage.....

 

Hang in there

 

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

Link to post
19 hours ago, Greatful said:

@Kat66

I am not sure how to answer that.  I suppose I am in the blah stage right now.  I feel drained and I don't have much to give.  Does that make sense?    Hubby thinks it is just a stage right now and that I will come back around.  I am still going to be on it, I just feel overwhelmed sometimes with so many of us in pain and dysfunction.

 

 

I know what you mean. I don't know who to read about next, there are so many of us. I know how good it must feel to support others on here, but it's also draining like you say, especially when your system is at a low ebb anyway.

19 hours ago, Greatful said:

 

I try and get out for a walk sometime in the morning, sometimes it will motive me to work on something for a little while....Even if you have a short attention span, have several things small things you can  do.

Walk in the morning, maybe a larger project, play on table for a little while, lunch. meditate, run out, watch a little tv, of course spend sometime on SA maybe a couple of times a day, supper, tablet , meditate, tablet, bed time.  Remember you are trying to get through the day, so you will be a day closer to feeling better.  Some days it is like pulling teeth to get up I know.

 

That's great advice. I try and do 2/3 'things' each day. That might only be making the bed, hanging some washing out or watering some plants, but I find this basic structuring of time and tasks really helps. I've given up thinking that I'm basically achieving 'nothing' and try to be thankful I've managed to do at least something. The standard of housework has definitely slipped though! 

 

19 hours ago, Greatful said:

Movement like walking and moving around the house will help with the anxiety.  

Have you ever tried to just sit in anxiety and connect with it?  Really it is just a sensation in your body.  Listen to it,  what does it feel like to you?  Where is it located?  You know that it will never hurt you and that it will only get to a certain point of tenseness and then is it.  It is kind of a interesting thing, anxiety, we feel we have to out run it because it is so uncomfortable, but why is it uncomfortable?  If you had a aching leg any other body sensation would you feel you have to run from it. 

Many here on SA read Claire Weeks "Hope and Help for Your Nerves"  You can also look her up on youtube.   

 

I'm starting to understand that the anxiety is not 'me', it's a separate thing. Perhaps this is what you're getting at with 'sitting with it' and recognising it as a 'sensation' that can't hurt you. Thanks I'll check Claire Weeks out....

 

19 hours ago, Greatful said:

I have 100mg capsule of Mag.  I pull apart one and pour half the powder into water and drink it, I do this about 4 times a day so  I am getting 200mg mag a day.  yes it does help.  It generally will ease some of the anxiety.  The tea seem to help too.   I can relate to the valium.  I am on a very tiny dose of xanax 3 times a day,  I was really panicked for about 2 weeks and I kept thinking about taking more xanax.  Just a thought though, I never did.  I want off all this garbage.....

 

Hang in there

 

 

In all honesty @Greatful I'm not sure if the magnesium is helping me or not. Does the xanax help? Have you tried lemon balm tea? x

History of depression and anxiety

 

Drugs; Venlafaxine 1998-1999, Prozac 2006-2007, Sertraline 50mg 2013-15, cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg 2015

Citalopram 20mg 2015-2021 (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019

Dropped from 20mg to 10mg early 2021 and stopped completely 25th June 2021

Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my seratonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp. Stopped 5htp 11th July, with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg/day. Reinstated cit at 1mg/day 16/7/21. Increased dose to 2mg/day 2/8/21. Multiple unsuccessful attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle, moderate drinker. Other medications; cliovance (HRT)

Other supplements; magnesium glycinate and calcium

 

Link to post
  • Mentor

@Kat66

37 minutes ago, Kat66 said:

The standard of housework has definitely slipped though! 

House work what is that.  I am lucky if I clean the kitchen more than 4 times a week.  It is just my husband and I so we don't have much for dishes......I try to keep up on the bathrooms....A quick once over.  Hubby will help with the floors for the dog hair.  Making the bed, what's that.  I think I made it maybe 4 times this whole summer. I am in survival mode and I will do things that somewhat motivate me.  I'm lucky mu hubby is not at all worried about how clean the house is😁

It is a far cry from I use to do...All though I started slacking before WD.  Just wasn't a priority anymore.  Life is to sort, do what you enjoy and skimp on the stuff that doesn't.  Of course if housework is your thing then great.😆

 

37 minutes ago, Kat66 said:

I'm not sure if the magnesium is helping me or not.

How much are you taking a day?  I know that I could be taking more than 200mg a day, I have room  to increase if I need.  Not sure what the max dose is.  When do you take it?  Most of the time I  notice a decrease when I take it.   It  can be to much at once, or not enough, or just works better to spread it out.  You will have to test the waters. 

I should try Lemon balm tea.   Is it a herbal tea?

 

37 minutes ago, Kat66 said:

Does the xanax help?

I was taking much more of it last winter and spring.  Doc kept pushing it "you are on such a low dose blah, blah".  He felt that there was to much worry over addiction.  He was pretty laid back about it.  I was very conservative with it, but I was taking it up to 3 to  5 times  a day.  Anyway after SA and I started to take magnesium and L Theanine I noticed that those helped with the anxiety so I started cutting back really fast.  Hence benzo WD along with ssri, seroquel, lamictal wd.  Frogie helped me set up an very low dose and spread out to three times a day.  I didn't want to go back up on it, so I think the little bit I take is just enough to hold the benzo wd to a minimum.

Even though I am still on low doses of drugs😥 I will get off them..... Man I just bummed myself outing rehashing the nightmare and still in it, then I have to get off the rest of the way.  

 

Hang in there.

Thanks for the chat❤️

 

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

Link to post
On 9/9/2021 at 6:28 PM, Greatful said:

@Kat66

House work what is that.  I am lucky if I clean the kitchen more than 4 times a week.  It is just my husband and I so we don't have much for dishes......I try to keep up on the bathrooms....A quick once over.  Hubby will help with the floors for the dog hair.  Making the bed, what's that.  I think I made it maybe 4 times this whole summer. I am in survival mode and I will do things that somewhat motivate me.  I'm lucky mu hubby is not at all worried about how clean the house is😁

It is a far cry from I use to do...All though I started slacking before WD.  Just wasn't a priority anymore.  Life is to sort, do what you enjoy and skimp on the stuff that doesn't.  Of course if housework is your thing then great.😆

 

Housework is not my thing LOL, but I'm starting to see that 'slacking' is not the worst thing in the world to do. Like you I've recognised that I'm in survival mode so I just whip round with the hoover and the duster and do the bare minimum. I'm impressed that you clean your kitchen 4 times a week! I wipe the surfaces down and clean the hob and wash up but that's basically it. I think there's a part of me that's worried I'll turn into one of those people that ends up living alone in a filthy house surrounded by crap, like I've just given up. That's a REALLY big worry of mine!

 

On 9/9/2021 at 6:28 PM, Greatful said:

How much are you taking a day?  I know that I could be taking more than 200mg a day, I have room  to increase if I need.  Not sure what the max dose is.  When do you take it?  Most of the time I  notice a decrease when I take it.   It  can be to much at once, or not enough, or just works better to spread it out.  You will have to test the waters. 

I should try Lemon balm tea.   Is it a herbal tea?

I'm taking 450mg a day of mag in the morning with breakfast. You noticed a decrease in anxiety when you take it?  Lemon balm tea is a herbal tea, yes, and is supposed to promote a sense of calm and better sleep. I don't know if it's working but maybe even if it's a placebo I'll take that.

 

On 9/9/2021 at 6:28 PM, Greatful said:

I was taking much more of it last winter and spring.  Doc kept pushing it "you are on such a low dose blah, blah".  He felt that there was to much worry over addiction.  He was pretty laid back about it.  I was very conservative with it, but I was taking it up to 3 to  5 times  a day.  Anyway after SA and I started to take magnesium and L Theanine I noticed that those helped with the anxiety so I started cutting back really fast.  Hence benzo WD along with ssri, seroquel, lamictal wd.  Frogie helped me set up an very low dose and spread out to three times a day.  I didn't want to go back up on it, so I think the little bit I take is just enough to hold the benzo wd to a minimum.

Bloody doctors! Maybe he should start taking it then try and come off it. I'm sure he wouldn't be quite so laid back then eh? Did L Theanine work for you, I've been wondering whether to try it.

Hope you're doing OK? xx

History of depression and anxiety

 

Drugs; Venlafaxine 1998-1999, Prozac 2006-2007, Sertraline 50mg 2013-15, cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg 2015

Citalopram 20mg 2015-2021 (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019

Dropped from 20mg to 10mg early 2021 and stopped completely 25th June 2021

Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my seratonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp. Stopped 5htp 11th July, with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg/day. Reinstated cit at 1mg/day 16/7/21. Increased dose to 2mg/day 2/8/21. Multiple unsuccessful attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle, moderate drinker. Other medications; cliovance (HRT)

Other supplements; magnesium glycinate and calcium

 

Link to post
  • Mentor

@Kat66  Thank you so much for the post. I am going through a rough spot, started yesterday and progressively got worse throughout the day.  Total melt down several times.  The depression hit bad this morning. Crazy how yesterday was high anxiety and near panic, and today it is the depression.  I needed someone to connect with.🥴

7 minutes ago, Kat66 said:

Bloody doctors! Maybe he should start taking it then try and come off it. I'm sure he wouldn't be quite so laid back then eh?

I still get sad and angry when I read the new members intro.  and STILL so many are all messed up from their doctors either don't know how to get off these meds or don't know how to prescribed them.  Some still don't believe that it is or even can be wd when their patients are a mess.  I can't believe how many are put on for things that are not even what they are made for.

PMS, pain.  I could go on and on.  We need to organize protest walks in and around the country and world. Like I member (who has recovered) stated it is a epidemic the meds, all prescribed meds  are out of control.  Take a pill for everything.   It should be illegal to prescribe the meds with out a thorough discloser on the risks and how to get off of them.

Here are a couple of things you may want to look into.

They are from the innercompass website.

 

https://www.theinnercompass.org/learn-unlearn/intervention/how-psychiatric-drugs-are-researched-and-marketed  

 

https://www.theinnercompass.org/blog/are-psychiatric-medications-safe-fdas-answer-may-surprise-you

I am on the fence with the L Theanine,  I have been taking it since May.  Sometimes it seems to work and then other times not so much. Who knows anymore what works other than time, meditation and acceptance. There is a thread on it in Symptoms & Care forum.

I would really recommend you split your dose of Magn up  and see if that works.  You maybe taking to much at one time.

How is your day going?

Where is Lancashire?

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

Link to post

Hi @Greatful I’m so sorry things are awful again, I can totally relate to the anxiety one day depression the next, are you in a wave at the moment?  You’re right it’s so sad to read the continuous stream of new members’ horror stories. There’s so much ignorance about these drugs but imagine if there was full disclosure in the dr’s surgery, people would run a mile! Then the poor pharma companies’ profits would fall and we can’t have that 😉
 

The only reason I don’t split up my mag is that I also take calcium and apparently you can’t take mag and calcium together?

 

I feel marginally better than yesterday but I’m still in bed at 10.30 and need lots of quiet today after a busy day yesterday. Let’s put it this way, a Brit won the US open and I’m really not that bothered, hello anhedonia!

 

So, Lancashire is a county in NW England.

History of depression and anxiety

 

Drugs; Venlafaxine 1998-1999, Prozac 2006-2007, Sertraline 50mg 2013-15, cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg 2015

Citalopram 20mg 2015-2021 (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019

Dropped from 20mg to 10mg early 2021 and stopped completely 25th June 2021

Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my seratonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp. Stopped 5htp 11th July, with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg/day. Reinstated cit at 1mg/day 16/7/21. Increased dose to 2mg/day 2/8/21. Multiple unsuccessful attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle, moderate drinker. Other medications; cliovance (HRT)

Other supplements; magnesium glycinate and calcium

 

Link to post
  • Mentor

@Kat66

2 hours ago, Kat66 said:

The only reason I don’t split up my mag is that I also take calcium and apparently you can’t take mag and calcium together?

 

I think you have to wait for about 2 hours between ( might want to double check this).  Take some magn then wait 2 hours then take calcium then you can space out your doses of magn throughout the day.

 

I get this panic feeling like I am drowning, fighting for air.  Or like I am swimming up stream and can barely hold my head above the water.  My brain is a jumbled mess and I want to shake my head so I can think clearly.   

 

3 hours ago, Kat66 said:

So, Lancashire is a county in NW England.

It is amazing how many people are going through this from all over the world.  SA is big life raft that spans the whole world.  It is sad but comforting to know that we are all in this together.

How is your support going at home?

Take care of yourself.❤️

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

Link to post
2 hours ago, Greatful said:

I get this panic feeling like I am drowning, fighting for air.  Or like I am swimming up stream and can barely hold my head above the water.  My brain is a jumbled mess and I want to shake my head so I can think clearly.   

 

It is sad but comforting to know that we are all in this together.

How is your support going at home?

Take care of yourself.❤️

Sounds horrible. I find it very hard to put into words how I feel when things are bad but it’s a feeling of both mental and physical shutting down I guess. I find it hard to even talk, and just want to be left alone as I haven’t the energy or motivation to spend any time with anyone, even my husband. He’s very supportive but I’ve lost interest in talking to him like I have with everyone else. Bad eh? It is comforting to know we’re all in this together. Xx

History of depression and anxiety

 

Drugs; Venlafaxine 1998-1999, Prozac 2006-2007, Sertraline 50mg 2013-15, cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg 2015

Citalopram 20mg 2015-2021 (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019

Dropped from 20mg to 10mg early 2021 and stopped completely 25th June 2021

Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my seratonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp. Stopped 5htp 11th July, with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg/day. Reinstated cit at 1mg/day 16/7/21. Increased dose to 2mg/day 2/8/21. Multiple unsuccessful attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle, moderate drinker. Other medications; cliovance (HRT)

Other supplements; magnesium glycinate and calcium

 

Link to post
  • Mentor

@Kat66   I really shut down after my little weekend away.  I hear you, when you say you can hardly talk.  Sometimes it is hard to follow what conversations and people talking can be over simulating.  I have sound sensitivity, so maybe that is part of the reason it is hard to listen to talking.  Tone of voice maybe. 

Just got back from a walk, hubby dragged me out of the house.  I really hate it when I get like this, no motivation but to restless to sit around.   

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

Link to post
2 hours ago, Greatful said:

@Kat66   I really shut down after my little weekend away.  I hear you, when you say you can hardly talk.  Sometimes it is hard to follow what conversations and people talking can be over simulating.  I have sound sensitivity, so maybe that is part of the reason it is hard to listen to talking.  Tone of voice maybe. 

Just got back from a walk, hubby dragged me out of the house.  I really hate it when I get like this, no motivation but to restless to sit around.   

 

God yes, I hate that no motivation yet restless feeling it’s impossible to know what to do. Did your walk help? What you say about sound sensitivity sounds familiar. I can’t listen to any music at the moment, only stuff like meditation music and birdsong. It’s weirdly reassuring to know you’re having similar experiences to me! X

History of depression and anxiety

 

Drugs; Venlafaxine 1998-1999, Prozac 2006-2007, Sertraline 50mg 2013-15, cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg 2015

Citalopram 20mg 2015-2021 (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019

Dropped from 20mg to 10mg early 2021 and stopped completely 25th June 2021

Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my seratonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp. Stopped 5htp 11th July, with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg/day. Reinstated cit at 1mg/day 16/7/21. Increased dose to 2mg/day 2/8/21. Multiple unsuccessful attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle, moderate drinker. Other medications; cliovance (HRT)

Other supplements; magnesium glycinate and calcium

 

Link to post
  • Mentor

@Kat66  The walk helped a little, it lifted the depression to a more manageable state.  

I got to restless and decided I  needed to go for a drive.  Hubby and I went to one daughter house for a little while then went for a long drive to some old hang out spots.  Ran the dog back home and then ran back out to a restaurant for a quick bit to eat.  Now I am tired and my brain is scrabbled, but ohh so glad to pass the afternoon and make it through another day.   I sure hope I don't pay for it tomorrow from the Mexican food I ate.  I am so tired of worrying about what I eat or what I do, if it will make things worse.🤢 

How about you?? How did your day go?

Tomorrow will be a good day, Right!

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin 2016  ended back on 2016  Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  through 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  Trazadone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/16 ct

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg   5/16  5mg

 5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   Magnesium glycinate 200mg. Omega 3 , Melatonin L Theanine 

Lexapro 2021/01/09 4.90mg  05/09  4.75mg

 

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