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Has over-stressing my nervous system lowered my chances of recovery?


GeoJeep
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I’m 7 months out from an adverse reaction, and, although some of my symptoms have gone, I generally feel worse than I did when my symptoms were at their peak. I’m worried that this is due in no small part to the fact that I’ve spent the past 7 months in absolute panic over my symptoms, especially during May and June.

 

I have been on edge and prone to fits of rage over my symptoms and perceived lack of improvement since my symptoms started. After being told by several doctors that there was no way that antidepressants could possibly cause my symptoms, I began to believe it for a while, and, after it was suggested to me back in May that my symptoms could be the prodromal phase of schizophrenia, I went absolutely ballistic for around two months.

 

I don’t think terms such as “rumination” or “perseverance” can really encapsulate my behavior after I had become convinced that I was going schizophrenic. I spent every second of every day constantly agonizing over it, reading article after article and analyzing my thoughts and symptoms. I don’t think I even relaxed for a moment until sometime earlier this month, when a psychologist finally convinced me that I wasn’t going schizophrenic. 
 

Needless to say, my perseverance over the past several months has taken a toll on me, mentally and physically, and I believe that it has made symptoms such as blunted emotions, cognitive fog, and fatigue worse than they were before. Is it possible to undo the damage that this stress has done? Can I still see improvement after running my nervous system ragged?

12/23/20 - started fluoxetine 20mg/day

1/2/21 - adverse reaction symptoms appeared

1/5/21 - stopped fluoxetine CT

present - some symptoms have remitted, but most have remained

 

Symptoms that have fully remitted: phantosmia, burning/tingling sensations on skin, muscle spasms

 

Symptoms that have partially remitted: numbness, DP/DR, impaired coordination, panic attacks

 

Symptoms that are still present: mental and physical fatigue, cognitive impairment(memory, concentration, problem solving, executive function, etc…), visual snow/retinal after images, headaches, feeling hungover, anhedonia, aphasia, loss of emotions, confusion/disorientation, loss of appetite, exercise intolerance, sensitivity to light/sound/temperature, depression, anxiety, “nervous system overload” feeling, sexual dysfunction(remitted and relapsed)

 

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  • Mentor
1 hour ago, GeoJeep said:

after it was suggested to me back in May that my symptoms could be the prodromal phase of schizophrenia, I went absolutely ballistic for around two months.

 

 

 

As anyone would! 🤦‍♀️ How awful to be treated like that. No words.

 

It is a commonly expressed fear around here that people are damaged irreparably. I have every faith that you will get better. The nervous system is adept at healing itself.

Now: 100 mg Zoloft am, 50 mg Trazodone bedtime.  Daily drug burden decreased from 2050 in 2018 mg to 150 mg 🐢🐢

Zoloft: 5/7/22 cut 12.5 mg 3/20/22 cut 12.5 mg 10/26/21 cut 6 mg 10/17/21 cut 5 mg, 9/17/21 Cut 3 mg,  9/13/21 cut 4 mg, 8/29/21 Cut 2 mg 8/8/21 Cut 3 mg  7/30/21 Zoloft: Converted 25 mg to liquid. Also take 100 mg pill & 25 mg pill=150 mg total
🌞 Feb 28, 2021 0 mg Gapapentin 2021 Gaba each dose 4x/day: Feb 27 7 mg (one dose only), Feb 10, 7 mg, Jan 14 10 mg 2020 Current taper schedule from Aug 30-present: drop 8 mg every 2-3 weeks. Aug 20 31 mg, Aug 18, 33 mg, July 29, 35 mg, July 23 38 mg, July 22 40 mg Jun 24 42 mg, Jun 15 44 mg, Jun 9 48 mg, May 22 50 mg, May 14 54 mg, May 7 56 mg, Apr 16 58 mg, Mar 28 60 mg, Mar 18 62 mg. Feb 26 64 mg. Feb 19, 66 mg. Jan 23, 70 mg. 2019 Dec 19, 72 mg. Nov 14 ,76 mg. Aug 8, 80 mg. Aug 6, 85 mg. Jul 26, 90 mg. Jul 11, 95 mg.

Jul 16 trazodone from 100 to 50 mg.

Jun 17-July 10 Slowly changed gab fr pill to liquid at same dose 100 mg 4x/d.

Apr 24 Stopped klon!!! 🌞 Apr 4  Decreased gaba to 400 mg (100 mg 4x/day)-Apr 4, 2019   0.25 klon March 11  Klonopin .5 mg twice daily, varied dose til Apr 15. Started Klon fast taper 25%, short use

Mar 16, 450 mg gaba 3x/day cut 600 mg--not exact!--updose after learning w/d

Feb 20, 2019 1800 mg gabapentin; MD taper; off 3 days=mvt disorder & autonomic instability. July 2018 temazepam 15 mg 1-2; prn several x/wk til Jan/Feb 2019 when cold turkey, flu illness for months

July 2018 started gabapentin 100 3x/day; titrated up to 1800 mg (600 3x/day)

Buspar, I forget how much, 2 pills a day Jan 2017-July 2018 cold turkey. On Zoloft since maybe 2004? After trying many.

*I speak from my experience. Nothing I say is medical advice. I'm not a doctor.

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11 minutes ago, ShiningLight said:

 

As anyone would! 🤦‍♀️ How awful to be treated like that. No words.

 

It is a commonly expressed fear around here that people are damaged irreparably. I have every faith that you will get better. The nervous system is adept at healing itself.

Thank you for believing that I can recover from this!

 

It’s pretty hard for me to believe that this will ever blow over. The past 7 months have been sheer agony, and I haven’t been able to find many recovery stories from folks who have have had similar reactions to a brief exposure to psychotropic meds. The thought of having to deal with this nightmare for years before noticing improvement is truly a frightening one…

12/23/20 - started fluoxetine 20mg/day

1/2/21 - adverse reaction symptoms appeared

1/5/21 - stopped fluoxetine CT

present - some symptoms have remitted, but most have remained

 

Symptoms that have fully remitted: phantosmia, burning/tingling sensations on skin, muscle spasms

 

Symptoms that have partially remitted: numbness, DP/DR, impaired coordination, panic attacks

 

Symptoms that are still present: mental and physical fatigue, cognitive impairment(memory, concentration, problem solving, executive function, etc…), visual snow/retinal after images, headaches, feeling hungover, anhedonia, aphasia, loss of emotions, confusion/disorientation, loss of appetite, exercise intolerance, sensitivity to light/sound/temperature, depression, anxiety, “nervous system overload” feeling, sexual dysfunction(remitted and relapsed)

 

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  • Mentor
On 7/31/2021 at 7:15 PM, GeoJeep said:

The thought of having to deal with this nightmare for years before noticing improvement is truly a frightening one…

 

Don't do years. Just do today. ❤️

Now: 100 mg Zoloft am, 50 mg Trazodone bedtime.  Daily drug burden decreased from 2050 in 2018 mg to 150 mg 🐢🐢

Zoloft: 5/7/22 cut 12.5 mg 3/20/22 cut 12.5 mg 10/26/21 cut 6 mg 10/17/21 cut 5 mg, 9/17/21 Cut 3 mg,  9/13/21 cut 4 mg, 8/29/21 Cut 2 mg 8/8/21 Cut 3 mg  7/30/21 Zoloft: Converted 25 mg to liquid. Also take 100 mg pill & 25 mg pill=150 mg total
🌞 Feb 28, 2021 0 mg Gapapentin 2021 Gaba each dose 4x/day: Feb 27 7 mg (one dose only), Feb 10, 7 mg, Jan 14 10 mg 2020 Current taper schedule from Aug 30-present: drop 8 mg every 2-3 weeks. Aug 20 31 mg, Aug 18, 33 mg, July 29, 35 mg, July 23 38 mg, July 22 40 mg Jun 24 42 mg, Jun 15 44 mg, Jun 9 48 mg, May 22 50 mg, May 14 54 mg, May 7 56 mg, Apr 16 58 mg, Mar 28 60 mg, Mar 18 62 mg. Feb 26 64 mg. Feb 19, 66 mg. Jan 23, 70 mg. 2019 Dec 19, 72 mg. Nov 14 ,76 mg. Aug 8, 80 mg. Aug 6, 85 mg. Jul 26, 90 mg. Jul 11, 95 mg.

Jul 16 trazodone from 100 to 50 mg.

Jun 17-July 10 Slowly changed gab fr pill to liquid at same dose 100 mg 4x/d.

Apr 24 Stopped klon!!! 🌞 Apr 4  Decreased gaba to 400 mg (100 mg 4x/day)-Apr 4, 2019   0.25 klon March 11  Klonopin .5 mg twice daily, varied dose til Apr 15. Started Klon fast taper 25%, short use

Mar 16, 450 mg gaba 3x/day cut 600 mg--not exact!--updose after learning w/d

Feb 20, 2019 1800 mg gabapentin; MD taper; off 3 days=mvt disorder & autonomic instability. July 2018 temazepam 15 mg 1-2; prn several x/wk til Jan/Feb 2019 when cold turkey, flu illness for months

July 2018 started gabapentin 100 3x/day; titrated up to 1800 mg (600 3x/day)

Buspar, I forget how much, 2 pills a day Jan 2017-July 2018 cold turkey. On Zoloft since maybe 2004? After trying many.

*I speak from my experience. Nothing I say is medical advice. I'm not a doctor.

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23 hours ago, ShiningLight said:

 

Don't do years. Just do today. ❤️

Doing my best to keep on trucking!

12/23/20 - started fluoxetine 20mg/day

1/2/21 - adverse reaction symptoms appeared

1/5/21 - stopped fluoxetine CT

present - some symptoms have remitted, but most have remained

 

Symptoms that have fully remitted: phantosmia, burning/tingling sensations on skin, muscle spasms

 

Symptoms that have partially remitted: numbness, DP/DR, impaired coordination, panic attacks

 

Symptoms that are still present: mental and physical fatigue, cognitive impairment(memory, concentration, problem solving, executive function, etc…), visual snow/retinal after images, headaches, feeling hungover, anhedonia, aphasia, loss of emotions, confusion/disorientation, loss of appetite, exercise intolerance, sensitivity to light/sound/temperature, depression, anxiety, “nervous system overload” feeling, sexual dysfunction(remitted and relapsed)

 

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  • 2 weeks later...

There is something about WD and Adverse reactions to meds, I think it's the cortisol deregulation, that makes us want to obsess over every symptom and worry and try to find a way to "fix it" past the point that, if not in this revved up state, we would have come to some sort of state of "acceptance" that it's an issue of time and being in a daily relaxed state that is the quickest road to recovery. 

 

The more we chronically think about our symptoms and ruminate abut them, the more power we give that negative energy and the longer we stay in that state.  It is extremely difficult to ignore them, but the quicker we start to break that pattern, they will diminish and we heal more quickly.  Stress and anxiety and worry will delay recovery, either WD  or Adverse reaction. Bad advice and false diagnosis' from doctors don't help, that is true.

 

The adrenaline wants to make us look months and years in advance and it overwhelms our entire system.

Their were days I was so bad, I literally could only go one hour at a time.

Now that I've somewhat progressed, I find the "One day at a time" motto really is reality in the most meaningful ways.

We like to "think" we plan our lives and are in control but a bad illness really makes us learn to accept how we really are just 1 person in a sea of humanity and it helps put ourselves in perspective.

 Starting ds 2 (12.5 CR'S) = 25 MG PAXIL CR 1/21/15: 1 Pill + 10mg liquid (2 weeks) 2/4: 1 Pill + 9mg Lq (3 weeks) 2/25: 1 Pill + 8 mg lq (1 week) 3/4: 1 Pill + 6 mg lq (2 weeks) 3/18/15 1 Pill + 4 mg lq (2 weeks) 4/1/15 1 Pill + 3 mg lq (2 weeks) 4/14/15 1 Pill + 2 mg lq (2 weeks) 4/29/15 1Pill + 1 mg lq (16 days) 5/15/15 1 12.5 mg Pill ONLY (9 days) 5/24/15 12 mgs liquid (8 days) 6/1/15 11mg lq (12 days) 6/13/15 10 mg.  12/3/15 Drop from 8mg to 7.6 (24 days to) 12/27/15 7.2mgs 8/4/16 6.8mgs,  11/1/16 6.4mgs, 2/5/17 6 mgs  4/3/17 5.6mgs, 4/24/17 5.2mg, 6/13/17 4.8mgs, 9/20/17 4.4mgS, 11/23/17 4 mgs, 1/1/18 3.6 mgs, 2/15/18 3.2 mgs. 4/13/18 2.8mgs, 5/11/18 2.4mgs, 6/10/18 2.0 mgs, 8/4/18 1.6mgs,  9/27/18 1.2mgs, 12/24/18 0.8mg, 3/24/19 0.64 mg,(syringe change issue date?) 4/22/19 0.60 mg, 5/24/19 0.60 mg, 7/7/19 0.52 mgs, 8/4/19 0.44mgs, 11/4/19 0.36mgs, 2/1/20 0.28mgs, 3/1/20 0.24mgs (crash April 6) Compound started 6/28/21: 0.24mgs, 8/29/21: 0.22mgs, 10/31/21: 0.20mgs, 1/03/22: 0.18mgs, 3/5/22: 0.16mgs, 5/5/22: 0.14mgs.

 

Original Wellbutrin Dose: 6 months from 9/14 to 3/2015, 300 XL 3/15/15: Half to 150 XL ( severe symptoms started on day 12) 4/16/15: 125mg   for 20 days to: 5/6/15:   100mg  for  15 days to: 5/21/15    75mg  for  10 days to: 6/1/15:  56.25mg      13 days to: 6/13/15: 37.25mg    7 days to: 6/20/15  28.12mg   14 days to: 7/4/15  18.75mg, 7 days to: 7/11/15; RAISE BACK TO: 28.12 to 8/14/15: 18.75mg  20 days to :9/3/15 : 12.5mg, 8/4/16 9mg 1/9/17: 8.5mg 2/8/17 8mg, 3/9/17: 7.6  4/9/17  7.2  5/27/17 6.4 6/24/17 5.8, 8/1/17 5.0, 8/29/17 4.2mgs, 10/2/17 3.5mgs, 12/28/17 2.5mgs, 2/27/18 1.7mgs,  4/19/18 0.8 mgs, LAST DOSE: 6/11/18:  3 YEARS, 2 MONTHS, 27 DAYS...

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  • 3 weeks later...

hello @Colonial just reading your post here, you talk about dwelling on our symptoms can cause more anxiety, since the beginning of the year, i have kept a journal of what i eat, my major symptoms, my sleep history every day, i write down everything, i even write down bowel movements and everytime i urinate as i do it soo often..and so believe it is a withdrawal symptom.....i find writing it down makes me remember and be more aware of what i am experiencing as my memory is very bad...also it helps to look back and see for example i did this that day and found my symptom lessoned so maybe if i do it again it might give me more relief....i guess what i am saying is....do you or anyone out there feel...writing down what i am experiencing every hour of the day and noticing yep..i have that symptom...making things worse for myself? because i am focusing too much on my symptoms ....should i just forget writing it all down and just ignore my pain and symptoms and insomnia....even thou i feel writing it down makes me feel that yes it isnt just in my head i am experiencing it, so that in a couple of months time i can look back and say yes i remember now i did experience that...would love to hear your thoughts on this and anyone elses too...cheers

Cipramil  40mg  1996 to Oct 2017 stopped cold turkey

Only on Zyprexa from now on :   10mg solid form 1998 to Oct 2017

7.5mg solid form  Oct 2017 to Oct 2019 5mg solid form  Oct 2019 to Apr 2020

3.75mg solid form Apr 2020 to May 2020 2.5mg solid form  May 2020 to Feb 2021 2.5mg solid 3/4 and 1/4 liquid w/ 5mls water 6th Feb 2021 to 2nd Apr 2021 2.5mg 1/2 solid and 1/2 liquid w/10mls water 3rd Apr to 26th Jun 2021

 2.5mg dissolved in 25mls of water from 27th Jun 2021 to 22nd Oct 2021 2.5mg 1/2 solid, 1/2 dissolved in 10mls of water from 23rd Oct 21 to 7th Feb 2022 water titrating from 7th Feb 2022 to 13 Aug 2022:  2.2425mg

 

 

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That is no fun, I had similar symptoms where I obsessively focused on some health issues (most didnt exist) and it caused my mind to run in circles all day and panic myself. It got so bad that if someone was telling me they went to the doctor I would start panicking that I needed to go to the doctor.

 

This process severely disrupts our CNS to completely abnormal levels and it plays out in adrenaline and cortisol surges creating panic.

 

Do not fret the more your CNS stabilizes  and the better you feel it will start to fade away. Mine has improved a lot.

 

In the meantime, try to let those thoughts cone amd go as the please but dont give them the attention they ask for. Easier said than done, but a good goal!

40 yo Male. Started Paxil about 15 years ago. 10 mg (pill weight .125 - .129 g). 5 yrs wanted less side effects, doctor took me off Paxil over couple week period and put me on Wellbutrin. Not good. Went back on Paxil. Relieved my symptoms, but didn't work as well and more side effects. Severe reaction between Paxil and Zomig Summer of 2012. Head was affected during warmer days (cloudiness, confusion, pressure). Began 10% withdrawal 10/24/12.

Withdrawel helped many symptoms, but also added side effects: nausea, dizziness, tiredness. Hyper-anxiety started January 2014.

Went through a 2 year period of de-realization (2016-2018).  Rarely any windows.  
Current dose: 0.00 as of 4/10/21.  Made a lot of progress in my withdrawal symptoms the last 2 years of my taper.  I think doing a liquid taper helped stabilize things on the lower doses.  A lot of my symptoms have reduced significantly.  Hoping for even more improvement now that I am off.
My thread: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8909-rusty1-paxil-withdrawal-help-and-advice-welcome/#entry150222

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9 hours ago, morgana said:

...do you or anyone out there feel...writing down what i am experiencing every hour of the day and noticing yep..i have that symptom...making things worse for myself? because i am focusing too much on my symptoms ....should i just forget writing it all down and just ignore my pain and symptoms and insomnia..

 

Keeping good records is very important!

That is not the same as "worrying" or constantly ruminating negatively about your symptoms in worry.

 

Actually, I found that doing exactly what you did in a wave helped me worry LESS because I knew I didn't have to try to "remember" everything once the wave past I would have a great record and then I could sit down and look back over it when I was feeling better, and see patterns over time.

 

It was only because I did this that I was able to piece together very strange events FOUR YEARS apart by happenstance of looking back into old notes.

So, good note taking, done properly, with a certain amount of emotional detachment is not only critical, but should help lessen your stress since you know going forward it will help you piece patterns together over time.

 

It only becomes a problem if we allow over selves to become emotionally distraught by the process, which you can control.

Remind yourself that good notes are beneficial as long as we don't "abuse" the process to ruminate or worry about the symptom we're writing down.

Over time, it should  not be any different than making a grocery list, so to speak.

 

Hope that helps!

 Starting ds 2 (12.5 CR'S) = 25 MG PAXIL CR 1/21/15: 1 Pill + 10mg liquid (2 weeks) 2/4: 1 Pill + 9mg Lq (3 weeks) 2/25: 1 Pill + 8 mg lq (1 week) 3/4: 1 Pill + 6 mg lq (2 weeks) 3/18/15 1 Pill + 4 mg lq (2 weeks) 4/1/15 1 Pill + 3 mg lq (2 weeks) 4/14/15 1 Pill + 2 mg lq (2 weeks) 4/29/15 1Pill + 1 mg lq (16 days) 5/15/15 1 12.5 mg Pill ONLY (9 days) 5/24/15 12 mgs liquid (8 days) 6/1/15 11mg lq (12 days) 6/13/15 10 mg.  12/3/15 Drop from 8mg to 7.6 (24 days to) 12/27/15 7.2mgs 8/4/16 6.8mgs,  11/1/16 6.4mgs, 2/5/17 6 mgs  4/3/17 5.6mgs, 4/24/17 5.2mg, 6/13/17 4.8mgs, 9/20/17 4.4mgS, 11/23/17 4 mgs, 1/1/18 3.6 mgs, 2/15/18 3.2 mgs. 4/13/18 2.8mgs, 5/11/18 2.4mgs, 6/10/18 2.0 mgs, 8/4/18 1.6mgs,  9/27/18 1.2mgs, 12/24/18 0.8mg, 3/24/19 0.64 mg,(syringe change issue date?) 4/22/19 0.60 mg, 5/24/19 0.60 mg, 7/7/19 0.52 mgs, 8/4/19 0.44mgs, 11/4/19 0.36mgs, 2/1/20 0.28mgs, 3/1/20 0.24mgs (crash April 6) Compound started 6/28/21: 0.24mgs, 8/29/21: 0.22mgs, 10/31/21: 0.20mgs, 1/03/22: 0.18mgs, 3/5/22: 0.16mgs, 5/5/22: 0.14mgs.

 

Original Wellbutrin Dose: 6 months from 9/14 to 3/2015, 300 XL 3/15/15: Half to 150 XL ( severe symptoms started on day 12) 4/16/15: 125mg   for 20 days to: 5/6/15:   100mg  for  15 days to: 5/21/15    75mg  for  10 days to: 6/1/15:  56.25mg      13 days to: 6/13/15: 37.25mg    7 days to: 6/20/15  28.12mg   14 days to: 7/4/15  18.75mg, 7 days to: 7/11/15; RAISE BACK TO: 28.12 to 8/14/15: 18.75mg  20 days to :9/3/15 : 12.5mg, 8/4/16 9mg 1/9/17: 8.5mg 2/8/17 8mg, 3/9/17: 7.6  4/9/17  7.2  5/27/17 6.4 6/24/17 5.8, 8/1/17 5.0, 8/29/17 4.2mgs, 10/2/17 3.5mgs, 12/28/17 2.5mgs, 2/27/18 1.7mgs,  4/19/18 0.8 mgs, LAST DOSE: 6/11/18:  3 YEARS, 2 MONTHS, 27 DAYS...

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thats true @Colonial it does take away my stress and anxiety thankyou for your input.

 

i can understand where your coming from @GeoJeep i went on Anti-depressants as i admit at the time  i was depressed eg lost job, nowhere to live and basically life was **** however i than lost the plot and began hallucinating in the end more medications were added and more labels were added i was labelled as clinical depressed, borderline personality disorder and schizo effective disorder and forced to take AP's and AD's against my will, i accepted their belief and was told i would need to be on medication for the rest of my life and so i continued taking it for the next 24 years because i had been told i needed it for the rest of my life...well since stopping my AD and reducing my AP down to 1/4 of what i use to be on..i no longer hallucinate, i feel more connected to my body and am actually feeling like a normal person again..Pych's label us so that they can get paid for the prescriptions they write, without a label put on us their is no prescription, without a prescription they wouldnt have a job, all i can suggest is stop seeing this Pych doctor and find more productive ways to heal your mind and body....

Cipramil  40mg  1996 to Oct 2017 stopped cold turkey

Only on Zyprexa from now on :   10mg solid form 1998 to Oct 2017

7.5mg solid form  Oct 2017 to Oct 2019 5mg solid form  Oct 2019 to Apr 2020

3.75mg solid form Apr 2020 to May 2020 2.5mg solid form  May 2020 to Feb 2021 2.5mg solid 3/4 and 1/4 liquid w/ 5mls water 6th Feb 2021 to 2nd Apr 2021 2.5mg 1/2 solid and 1/2 liquid w/10mls water 3rd Apr to 26th Jun 2021

 2.5mg dissolved in 25mls of water from 27th Jun 2021 to 22nd Oct 2021 2.5mg 1/2 solid, 1/2 dissolved in 10mls of water from 23rd Oct 21 to 7th Feb 2022 water titrating from 7th Feb 2022 to 13 Aug 2022:  2.2425mg

 

 

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  • 4 weeks later...

@Thelongestroadhome

 

Thank you for your reply.

 

I haven’t thought I had schizophrenia for a while. I saw 2 different psychologists who independently told me that I was almost certainly not at risk of psychosis.

 

Unfortunately, I don’t know if neuroplasticity is on my side. I think it’s likely that the Prozac caused some sort of epigenetic alterations. Neuroplasticity can’t change damage to gene expression.

12/23/20 - started fluoxetine 20mg/day

1/2/21 - adverse reaction symptoms appeared

1/5/21 - stopped fluoxetine CT

present - some symptoms have remitted, but most have remained

 

Symptoms that have fully remitted: phantosmia, burning/tingling sensations on skin, muscle spasms

 

Symptoms that have partially remitted: numbness, DP/DR, impaired coordination, panic attacks

 

Symptoms that are still present: mental and physical fatigue, cognitive impairment(memory, concentration, problem solving, executive function, etc…), visual snow/retinal after images, headaches, feeling hungover, anhedonia, aphasia, loss of emotions, confusion/disorientation, loss of appetite, exercise intolerance, sensitivity to light/sound/temperature, depression, anxiety, “nervous system overload” feeling, sexual dysfunction(remitted and relapsed)

 

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That's what's happened with me. I've carried the symptoms with me. The brain has become mangled in some way. I lived on my own during taking venlafaxine and withdrawal/taper. I'm trying to get back to the way I was 20 years ago, pre tablets. I've tested it out, when I'm not in my environment where I've had all issues, I seem to be how I was 20 years ago.  Because most people who haven't took medication will tell you they have never felt different over their lifetime, they are doing things flawlessly.  The term "interupted" is definitely something you can put on people with anti psychotics or depressants. Everything becomes less natural and flawlessly. When we were children we did things as they came, flawlessly.  

Social Anxiety diagnosis at root.

 

Born. 1983.

 

2001 - 2003  olanzapine and risperidone. 

 

2003 - 2007 Seroxat and prophanol. Cold turkey. Went on venlafaxine straight after.

 

2008- 2014. Venlafaxine. 6 month taper, crushing tablets powder form.

 

end 2014 - present. No meds.

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I'm in the same boat. Over the past 14 months or so i've done a lot of rapid tapering and cold turkey attempts. Got me nowhere but stuck on the standard dose.

Hopefully patience and less worrying about it will serve me well over time.

May 2017 Zyprexa 15mg Citalopram 20mg

August 2020-Started zig zag  tapering(example: 15mg to 11.25 for a few days then back up to 15 then back down again)-> March 2021

March 2021-October many failed cold turkey attempts, some as long as a week or two before reinstating 15mg zyprexa/20mg citalopram

Aprox. November 10th-December 16th >failed cross taper to Rexulti 2mg and Sertraline 100mg. Cross taper aborted.

 

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