rilexapro: Problems with APRN, led to problems with Lexapro.

[Altostrata]

Please go to the Events, actions, controversies forum and ask your questions in the appropriate topics.

[ChessieCat]

NOTE TO MODS:

 

This post has been moved from another area of the site:

 

1 hour ago, rilexapro said:

It's been a year of feeling unhealthy. Will I ever be myself again?

 

I explained my story in my introductory thread a while ago, but to sum it up here, I had been on 30mg of Lexapro for years, went off it cold turkey in June 2020 due to refill issues with my APRN, tried going back on Lexapro at a 10mg dosage a few months later (From late September 2020 to early October 2020), and had to stop again due to a multitude of rapidly onsetting problems, such as brain fog, fatigue, memory loss, nerve issues, numb emotions, jaw clenching, chest/neck pain, low/no libido, breathing problems, sinus issues, watery mucus, and a ton of other stuff I can't remember.

 

It has been over a year since I have taken any sort of psych med. I was put on Lisinopril 20mg for high blood pressure, which still can get high, so I'm not sure if that's totally related to the SSRI, but I do not take anything else of that sort.

 

I have spent all year going to doctors and trying to research myself what could have happened. I possibly caused myself serotonin syndrome by taking an over the counter 5-HTP supplement alongside the Lexapro, but 1. I find it odd 30mg of Lexapro would not cause that, but 10mg of Lexapro plus 5-HTP would, and 2. Serotonin syndrome most of the time is very acute, and is not something subtle, and also mostly goes away once the toxins are removed. My problems have been long term.

 

I also wonder if I had COVID, and I've had what they call "long COVID" where the symptoms take a long time to heal.

 

I have considered taking legal action against the APRN/Lexapro manufacturers, but I would need proof the Lexapro cause this, and I don't know how to do that. My former APRN lives in Texas, and I live in Rhode Island, so I do not know if she was doing anything legally unsound. From what I know, APRNs in Texas are legally required to work with physicians, but she wasn't licensed in Texas itself, she just resides there.

 

My main trouble is seeing a light at the end of the tunnel. My problems have slowly improved, but some days are just as bad as it was last year. I felt so sick and awful last year, I can't believe Lexapro would do it, considering I had actually gone off Lexapro a few times before last year, and re-instated myself, with no serious problems. Maybe I had COVID, I don't know. I'm just looking for some optimism. This year has been terrible, at the same time this is happening to me, my mom was dying of cancer. I haven't had time to properly address my grief with that, due to Lexapro possibly doing serious harm to my brain and body.

 

 

[rilexapro]

Sorry, I didn't know where to post it. I apologize.

 

I made a new thread just for advice and support. It's very hard dealing with this sometimes.

[rilexapro]

18 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

Please go to the Events, actions, controversies forum and ask your questions in the appropriate topics.

 

Should I repost that post somewhere else? I meant it to be a new thread, unrelated to this one. Sorry about this.

[Altostrata]

Adding this here in case these questions come up again.

Just now, Altostrata said:

....

@rilexapro as explained to you in your Introductions topic, your long-time habit of taking your high 30mg dosage of escitalopram irregularly probably gave you intermittent withdrawal syndrome and set you up for even worse neurological instability after cold turkey.

 

For example:

 

 

"Anxious and paranoid" would not be an unusual way of describing intermittent withdrawal for years finally leading to a fairly constant destabilized state or "sudden health problems possibly caused by Lexapro" (from your signature) in 2020.

 

It's pretty well documented 1) that skipping doses of SSRIs leads to withdrawal symptoms; 2) people who go on and off the drugs find they don't "work" anymore; 3) after going off an antidepressant, there's a fairly high rate of subsequent antidepressants not "working". This may lead to a diagnosis of "treatment-resistant depression" and ECT.

 

What you think might be serotonin syndrome is related to #3. After years of bouncing your nervous system around with inconsistent dosing followed by cold turkey, your nervous system was sensitized and rejected attempted reinstatement of 10mg escitalopram, possibly a kindling reaction.

 

Serotonin syndrome is a condition caused by too much serotonergic stimulation, usually from a combination of drugs. Your history does not show any evidence of serotonin syndrome.

 

 

Since you've seen improvement now that you've stopped messing yourself up with taking a powerful drug irregularly, why would you think you would not continue to see improvement? Why are you posting in this extremely negative topic?

 

While your APRN might have been negligent, your own actions might have contributed to your current state. It's not a mystery that taking a long-term antidepressant irregularly can cause bad symptoms.

 

[rilexapro]

What am I supposed to do? I feel hopeless.

 

It has been a year of constant pain and suffering. Every medical test I get back doesn't give me a clear diagnosis. I was only on one psych med, but it's left such a horrible impact on me. I've lost everything I had that I was proud of. My awful parents forced me on meds as a young boy, and I allowed them to take advantage of me, because I was in such a fragile state of mind. My parents forced me to go back on Lexapro after I quit cold turkey due to it not working anymore, and the APRN being uncaring, and not being concerned I was going off Lexapro cold turkey in the first place. My whole life has been uncaring people who harm me.

 

The uncaring APRN put me back on 10mg of Lexapro, and ever since then is when this awfulness started. I had to re-quit the medication, and the APRN abandoned me to my fate. Never cared about the severe health problems I had because of her choices.

My father doesn't believe me, he just tells me that walking would fix all of this. My primary care doctor believes it's just in my head, too. Everybody is so uncaring. My parents caused this, and now I'm left seeing doctors endlessly, instead of having a happy life.

The past week I have felt like I had the flu. Entire body felt weak, exhausted, and extremely fatigued. I have constant nerve problems on the left side of my body. The only emotions I feel now are sadness and anger. I have lost so many memories, and struggle to remember simple words and phrases.

 

What hope is there for me? You read about people recovering from this, but then you read articles about how these medications permanently damaged the taker. What am I supposed to believe? Is anybody willing to help.

 

Edited November 11, 2021 by ChessieCat
added topic title before merging with intro topic

[Kerry1960]

I am very sorry you have gone through all this pain. I have had a similar experience. My brain and nervous system healed and still are healing. I had trauma therapy developed strong boundaries. People will take advantage of others . No one has the right to dictate another person's reality or dehumanize them. 

[rilexapro]

1 hour ago, Kerry1960 said:

I am very sorry you have gone through all this pain. I have had a similar experience. My brain and nervous system healed and still are healing. I had trauma therapy developed strong boundaries. People will take advantage of others . No one has the right to dictate another person's reality or dehumanize them. 

 

I feel so unlucky. There are people who take heavy drug cocktails for psych related issues, and never have this sort of chronic problem. I don't know if my body is still healing, or not, but I feel better compared to 3 days ago. Maybe the flu like feelings are my body still getting over Lexapro?

 

I harbor a lot of anger towards my former APRN prescriber. Even if Lexapro turns out to not be the cause, this person completely dropped me as a client after 6-7 years, right as I started having side effects, leaving me to deal with it myself. This entire year has been doctors visits and mental and physical pain for me. I just want to feel myself again. I am still going to see what I would need for a case against her. I had told the APRN Lexapro wasn't working for me, and she refused to take me off of it.

 

I'm glad I'm off Lexapro, as I no longer have volatile anger or paranoia/anxiety episodes anymore, but I still feel just wiped out. My brain sometimes goes back to thinking quickly, but there are days where it goes back to being foggy and lethargic.

 

I just want somebody to tell me that yes, this can be repaired. I don't want to forever feel like this. I want to get back to myself again.

[Kerry1960]

I am on generic liquid prozac. I am down to 3mg from 60mg. I would not say I am experiencing withdrawal. From this site and my research prozac is one of the easier antidepressants to withdraw from. Yes I do believe you will recover. I reached the point where I reconciled myself with the fact that doctors overmedicated me for profit in conjunction with the pharmaceutical industry. I would also describe myself as a codependent who needs to be aware to care for self first. That is not selfish. Even with my medical background I constantly remind myself I cannot help people even though I have a lot of knowledge. These are my boundaries. I am busy following health care provider treatment plans to achieve evidence based medicine goals. I spend time processing my emotions too because I take very little pychotrophic medication. Anger is part of the healing process

[rilexapro]

3 hours ago, Kerry1960 said:

I am on generic liquid prozac. I am down to 3mg from 60mg. I would not say I am experiencing withdrawal. From this site and my research prozac is one of the easier antidepressants to withdraw from. Yes I do believe you will recover. I reached the point where I reconciled myself with the fact that doctors overmedicated me for profit in conjunction with the pharmaceutical industry. I would also describe myself as a codependent who needs to be aware to care for self first. That is not selfish. Even with my medical background I constantly remind myself I cannot help people even though I have a lot of knowledge. These are my boundaries. I am busy following health care provider treatment plans to achieve evidence based medicine goals. I spend time processing my emotions too because I take very little pychotrophic medication. Anger is part of the healing process

 

I didn't taper properly, though. I went from 30mg, to cold turkey, back to 10mg months later, and back to cold turkey again.

I'd like to know when I'm supposed to start feeling real recovery. Almost daily I have facial nerve problems, a numbness feeling. It doesn't improve, even a year after it initially started.

[rilexapro]

Was it wrong/negligent for my psych med prescriber to attempt to put me back on 10mg of Lexapro after being off 30mg of Lexapro cold turkey about 3 months prior? I had to quit again because I began having a plethora of health problems that have now become chronic.

I remember getting a very dull, heavy feeling in my head, and then mild bruxism, and then the issues that I mentioned in my introductory thread.

I don't mean to sound alarmist, but does "kindling" entail that damage was done to the brain, or it was just a bad reaction to the drug, with nothing permanent in the long term? I had a brain MRI done about 4 months after these symptoms started and it came back fine. I've read people who have symptoms like mine usually have signs of damage on an MRI, but I didn't. I have another MRI scheduled in November.

[ChessieCat]

SA would have suggested starting with a very low dose.  After being off for 3 months my suggestion would have been to try a tiny dose to test to see how you reacted to it and if no issues then to increase by a small amount.  And instead of reinstating Lexapro / escitalopram, SA might have suggested substituting citalopram which is a gentler sibling of Lexapro and easier to get non standard doses.

 

Lexapro is a very strong drug.  You were taking a very high dose originally and reinstating 10mg was much too high.  See the quote at the bottom of this post especially the text that I coloured blue.

 

Kindling is when the nervous system is destabilised and can become very sensitive.  See the first bit of information in Post #1 of this topic:  post-withdrawal-nervous-system-hypersensitivity-hyper-reactivity-and-kindling

 

From the Tips for Tapering Lexapro topic Post #1:

  

On 5/27/2011 at 12:16 PM, Altostrata said:

A significant characteristic of Lexapro is that milligram for milligram, it is much stronger than other SSRIs. Chemically, Lexapro is a variation of Celexa; the molecule was re-engineered to be patentable as Celexa's patent was about to expire. The streamlined molecule is a more potent SSRI, 2 to 4 times stronger than others. (Wikipedia has a good explanation of this at https://secure.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/wiki/Escitalopram.)

However, many doctors are unaware that escitalopram is stronger than other SSRIs and dose it as though it were the same strength. Although the so-called usual starting dose of escitalopram, 10mg, is equivalent to 20mg-30mg or more of, for example, paroxetine (Paxil), your doctor may have moved you to an even higher dose. If you are taking 20mg of escitalopram, you are taking a hefty dose of an SSRI.

If you are taking 5mg of Lexapro, it's not tiny, it's equivalent to 10-20mg Paxil or Celexa.

 

Edited October 27, 2021 by ChessieCat

[ChessieCat]

3 hours ago, rilexapro said:

I have another MRI scheduled in November.

 

If you have had one MRI that showed no issues, then having a second one will most probably (I think almost definitely) also return showing nothing.

 

See other members' experiences of MRI showing no issues:

 

brain-scans-fmri-qeeg-pet-or-spect-for-psychiatric-problems

[rilexapro]

7 hours ago, ChessieCat said:

SA would have suggested starting with a very low dose.  After being off for 3 months my suggestion would have been to try a tiny dose to test to see how you reacted to it and if no issues then to increase by a small amount.  And instead of reinstating Lexapro / escitalopram, SA might have suggested substituting citalopram which is a gentler sibling of Lexapro and easier to get non standard doses.

 

Lexapro is a very strong drug.  You were taking a very high dose originally and reinstating 10mg was much too high.  See the quote at the bottom of this post especially the text that I coloured blue.

 

Kindling is when the nervous system is destabilised and can become very sensitive.  See the first bit of information in Post #1 of this topic:  post-withdrawal-nervous-system-hypersensitivity-hyper-reactivity-and-kindling

 

From the Tips for Tapering Lexapro topic Post #1:

  

 

 

Do you think the prescriber did something that they could be liable for? I've had health problems ever since, and they refused further help or advice for me. This only started after they put me back on Lexapro. They didn't suggest anything else other than going back on Lexapro. They refused the original 30mg refill because my webcam didn't work for the session in June. They knew I was upset because of that, but didn't try to figure out a way to get me a refill. They didn't suggest trying my phone's camera or anything.

 

I feel so stupid for letting the prescriber put me back on Lexapro. It wasn't working for me anyway, so I don't know why I went back on it. I was just very anxious and thought it might stabilize me. Now it's left me with problems that might never go away. I just want somebody to tell me that yes, I will heal, but who knows?

 

I get worried a lot I'll never be the same again. My thinking process is different now along with my body. I'm really scared a lot about it. I'm getting new problems, like muscle twitching around my body, and nerve pain in my genitals, and this wasn't happening 6 months ago. I also had a libido 6 months ago, and now I do not. I feel so unlucky, Lexapro was the only psych med I've taken in years, and it caused more damage than some people who switch meds around all the time, and are on higher dosages than me. Same for people who do hard drugs. 

I wonder if the new problems like low libido are due to Lexapro slowly leaving my system. Maybe it's bringing down brain chemical levels over time. Would it be a bad idea to try another medication, once I find out what possible damage was done by Lexapro, or whatever's causing my chronic problems?

I've felt very fatigued the past week, I'm not sure what the cause of that is. Could my problems be blood related, and not Lexapro related? I still find it strange my problems got worse after I stopped the 10mg dosage. What do you think is the explanation for my health problems not improving very much over time, and for the problems to get worse after I stopped Lexapro a second time?

I have had blood work done, and some of the levels are off consistently. I've never heard of Lexapro causing low iron, high WBC and RBC, high platelet levels, or high glucose, so maybe my problems are also related to that? I also got diagnosed with sinusitis. 

I feel so dumb for going off Lexapro cold turkey at 30mg, but then going back on 10mg, without ever researching what could possibly happen. I never thought I would have such a severe reaction. I get very worried it might be permanent, since the symptoms I started having were so severe.

What tests would help diagnose me? I'm getting a new MRI for my neurologist, who wants an EMG test and a new MRI as a base. Would a lumbar puncture help see what's going on with my brain? I have a qEEG scan in late December. Is there any supplements I should be taking? The only good thing is my neck pain is basically gone, and that might be because of the magnesium I take.

[rilexapro]

7 hours ago, ChessieCat said:

 

If you have had one MRI that showed no issues, then having a second one will most probably (I think almost definitely) also return showing nothing.

 

See other members' experiences of MRI showing no issues:

 

brain-scans-fmri-qeeg-pet-or-spect-for-psychiatric-problems

Can the wonky Lexapro dosages I've had cause chronic nerve damage? I've read a story of somebody who had a severe reaction to Lexapro, but he never mentioned nerve damage. Also, his MRI showed brain damage, mine was near perfect save for a partially empty sella turcica, and CSF buildup in optical nerve.

There was a few days in September I really started to feel okay again. It was like my brain was telling my body to hurry up and feel good again, because mentally I was getting there. Now, for the past week or so, I've felt terrible. Not sure what's happening.

Is it possible this is a perfect storm of intense stress, Lexapro misusage, and abnormal blood work causing all this, and not just the Lexapro? Last year I went from having a days long breakdown, ending up on a psych hold at the ER, to getting back on Lexapro, to my mom almost passing away at home due to stage 4 cancer/cirrhosis, to getting a rapid onset of all the problems I've mentioned, and then her dying. It feels like stress must have played a factor here too.

SSRIs can mess with people, but I thought the smart thing would have been to re-try Lexapro just to stabilize me after quitting 30mg cold turkey, instead of trying a new drug that my system wasn't used to. I had used 30mg of Lexapro for years, so I thought maybe it was still built up in my system, even after 3 months. Was I wrong to accept trying 10mg of Lexapro? Looking back, I would never do it now.

[rilexapro]

Saw a chiropractor today, the X-Rays done showed problems in my neck and lower back, which could be the main reason for my nerve problems in the left side of my face and groin area. I remember the chiropractor saying my pelvis was tilted, which could explain the newer genital pain on the left side of my body.

When the chiropractor pushed on the left areas of my body, there was intense pain, compared to the right side.

 

This is a step in a good direction, as I may finally get a solution to at least my nerve problems. I have an endocrinology appointment tomorrow, and will be seeing if my neurological problems could be blood/hormone/prediabetic related. I was pre-diabetic last year, and my glucose levels were high, when the metabolic panel was done last week. 

 

I think I may have said this, but it would be a great relief to find out these problems aren't SSRI related, or at least the SSRI didn't cause anything that can't be repaired. Lexapro did work for me for a time, but the prescriber I had refused to listen or be concerned at my behavioral changes and mood changes, and her only solution was to try putting me back on a med that wasn't working anyway. I'd feel less hopeless if these problems can be fixed, and aren't related to neurological damage. 

[rilexapro]

I have an MRI in another week, but I don't think it'll show anything. I'd like them to do a PET scan on my brain, but I don't know if they'd order that.

 

What should I be asking doctors? I tell them my story all the time, and it leads nowhere. The neurologist I see implies this is all anxiety, but I'm not anxious at all.

[ChessieCat]

I have moved the new topic that you created and merged it with your Introduction topic.  See this post.

 

Each member has their own Introduction topic.  Your Introduction topic is the best place to ask questions specific to your own situation and to journal your progress.  This keeps your history in one place and means that you do not have to repeat your story.

[rilexapro]

1 hour ago, ChessieCat said:

I have moved the new topic that you created and merged it with your Introduction topic.  See this post.

 

Each member has their own Introduction topic.  Your Introduction topic is the best place to ask questions specific to your own situation and to journal your progress.  This keeps your history in one place and means that you do not have to repeat your story.

 

Okay. I apologize for creating multiple threads. If I can ask you, how did you know you had serotonin toxicity, and what did it cause? I've been wondering if I had it myself.

[ChessieCat]

Serotonin toxicity is usually by taking 2 or more serotonergic drugs.  In my case I was only taking one, but I was taking 100mg Pristiq.

 

My serotonin toxicity was only mild.

 

What I experienced was excessive sweating when only gently walking in the middle of a Sydney winter.  My leg muscles would cramp.  I had internal agitation and I think also mild anxiety.  My diastolic blood pressure also increased a lot after my dose was increased from 50mg Pristiq to 100mg.  The doctor did NOT make the connect with the increased Pristiq and just doubled my blood pressure drug.

 

As I reduced my dose those symptoms gradually eased.

 

If you are thinking about the possibility of serotonin toxicity when you were taking 30mg Lexapro, that is a possibility.  Lexapro is a very strong drug.

 

On 5/27/2011 at 12:16 PM, Altostrata said:

 

If you are taking 5mg of Lexapro, it's not tiny, it's equivalent to 10-20mg Paxil or Celexa.
 

 

 

This post gives comparison with other drugs doses:

 

dose-equivalents-equivalency-for-antidepressants-and-second-generation-antipsychotics

[ChessieCat]

https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/serotonin-syndrome/symptoms-causes/syc-20354758

[rilexapro]

10 hours ago, ChessieCat said:

Serotonin toxicity is usually by taking 2 or more serotonergic drugs.  In my case I was only taking one, but I was taking 100mg Pristiq.

 

My serotonin toxicity was only mild.

 

What I experienced was excessive sweating when only gently walking in the middle of a Sydney winter.  My leg muscles would cramp.  I had internal agitation and I think also mild anxiety.  My diastolic blood pressure also increased a lot after my dose was increased from 50mg Pristiq to 100mg.  The doctor did NOT make the connect with the increased Pristiq and just doubled my blood pressure drug.

 

As I reduced my dose those symptoms gradually eased.

 

If you are thinking about the possibility of serotonin toxicity when you were taking 30mg Lexapro, that is a possibility.  Lexapro is a very strong drug.

 

 

 

This post gives comparison with other drugs doses:

 

dose-equivalents-equivalency-for-antidepressants-and-second-generation-antipsychotics

 

I only had symptoms similar to serotonin syndrome when I was put back on 10mg of Lexapro, and it wasn't immediately, which I thought serotonin syndrome happens pretty rapidly in people. I never felt as bad as I do now when I was taking 30mg regularly. I had to quit the 10mg because of the problems. I'm still not sure what happened. It could have been a kindling effect, as 3 months had passed between 30mg cold turkey and 10mg. I had taken 5-HTP as a replacement for it in that period of time, but it didn't cause any adverse health reactions, nor did it really help me, so that was a pointless venture.

 

I feel really just taken advantage of by the prescriber. I was never warned that Lexapro was a strong drug. Nor was I warned about the dangers of quitting cold turkey, or the dangers of being put back on 10mg 3 months after quitting cold turkey. I've been left with these problems while that person refused to help me after I started having these problems. I also told them Lexapro wasn't working for me and refused to help me with that, which is why I sort of recklessly just quit it. I actually felt healthy even after quitting cold turkey, but I was an emotional wreck, but I had been a wreck all year, because the Lexapro wasn't helping with anxiety at all.

 

I'm not sure what to do. I've seen doctors all year for it. I feel sick and fatigued a lot, even a year later. The left side of my neck is extremely stiff a lot of the time. Not sure what happened, if something got damaged, or what. Would a PCP be able to order a scan to see what's going on in my neck? I think it relates to the neuropathy going on in the left side of my face, and the general neuropathy I'm experiencing in the left side of my body in general. The last brain MRI showed evidence of idiopathic intracranial hypertension, but no sort of damage otherwise. I would have guessed a brain MRI would have shown why I have nerve trouble in my face, but I don't know.

 

From what I know, serotonin syndrome usually doesn't leave permanent problems after stopping whatever is causing it, but my problems have lasted for a year now. I never passed out, had clonus or a very severe muscle disorder similar to that, or had seizures or anything that severe. I had throbbing headaches, fatigue, muscle twitching, jaw stiffness, stuff like that. It's just a really odd reaction to Lexapro, and nobody's been able to say what it caused to happen in my body.

 

I was hoping the PCP I'll be seeing in January would order some sort of brain activity scan like a PET or fMRI or something like that, but I don't know. I can get a qEEG scan, but I have to pay out of pocket for it.

 

Where I live is sort of barebones for specialists. Boston would probably be the place to go for this, but I only have state Medicaid. Not sure what to do.

[ChessieCat]

6 hours ago, rilexapro said:

I only had symptoms similar to serotonin syndrome when I was put back on 10mg of Lexapro, and it wasn't immediately, which I thought serotonin syndrome happens pretty rapidly in people. I never felt as bad as I do now when I was taking 30mg regularly. I had to quit the 10mg because of the problems. I'm still not sure what happened. It could have been a kindling effect, as 3 months had passed between 30mg cold turkey and 10mg. I had taken 5-HTP as a replacement for it in that period of time, but it didn't cause any adverse health reactions, nor did it really help me, so that was a pointless venture.

 

Q:  Did you take 5-htp at the same time as the Lexapro?

 

From https://reference.medscape.com/drug-interactionchecker

• escitalopram + 5-HTP

  escitalopram and 5-HTP both increase serotonin levels. Modify Therapy/Monitor Closely.

 

If you were only taking Lexapro then I doubt that it was serotonin toxicity, especially if you did NOT experience it when taking 30mg.  When reinstating, SA recommends starting with a low dose and gradually increasing by small amounts if necessary.  This is because withdrawal symptoms can make our system more sensitive.  This may have happened to you.

 

I don't think you need to worry about serotonin toxicity.

 

Other members have had scans done and nothing has been found.  However, if it something that you are very concerned about and this causes stress, then getting the tests done can ease your mind.

 

It takes about 4 days for a dose to get to full level in the blood and a bit longer for it to register in the brain.

 

See Post #1 of this topic which provides a lot of information about reinstating:

 

about-reinstating-and-stabilizing-to-reduce-withdrawal-symptoms

 

[Altostrata]

There is no mystery as to why you felt terrible while you were supposed to be taking 30mg Lexapro daily: It was because you were taking it irregularly.

 

This is not a neurological disorder. Neurologists are not going to find anything about it in their tests.

 

Reinstatement of 10mg Lexapro was unlikely to cause serotonin syndrome or toxicity. A kindling effect is more likely.

 

Treatment of serotonin syndrome is going off the drug and letting the symptoms resolve. Same with kindling.

[rilexapro]

9 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

There is no mystery as to why you felt terrible while you were supposed to be taking 30mg Lexapro daily: It was because you were taking it irregularly.

 

This is not a neurological disorder. Neurologists are not going to find anything about it in their tests.

 

Reinstatement of 10mg Lexapro was unlikely to cause serotonin syndrome or toxicity. A kindling effect is more likely.

 

Treatment of serotonin syndrome is going off the drug and letting the symptoms resolve. Same with kindling.

 

Surprisingly enough, I never felt terrible health-wise when taking 30mg of Lexapro. I felt emotionally very off, but not unhealthy and chronically sick like I do now. None of the symptoms that I've had since October 2020 were happening in the slightest before that, even when I would forget to take Lexapro/just not take it for whatever reason. This only started after the attempted 10mg dosage reinstatement in late September 2020. It's strange, but that's what my story is. 

 

I've been off Lexapro completely for a year, but my symptoms are still as persistent and chronic. I agree that going back off the med should resolve the problem, whether it is serotonin syndrome or kindling, which is what I find so strange. Both a brain MRI and chest CT scan show nothing, and my blood work isn't perfect, but isn't definitive of any sort of blood disorder, so I'm not sure what's causing the problems over a year later. My hematologist agrees something is going on, but he believes it's something akin to inflammation/infection, and not anemia. It's frustrating and very peculiar. Unless I had a severe case of COVID, or some sort of other severe infection, I truly don't know. I haven't taken any SSRIs in over a year. My system should be clean of it by now.

 

22 minutes ago, ChessieCat said:

 

Q:  Did you take 5-htp at the same time as the Lexapro?

 

From https://reference.medscape.com/drug-interactionchecker

• escitalopram + 5-HTP

  escitalopram and 5-HTP both increase serotonin levels. Modify Therapy/Monitor Closely.

 

If you were only taking Lexapro then I doubt that it was serotonin toxicity, especially if you did NOT experience it when taking 30mg.  When reinstating, SA recommends starting with a low dose and gradually increasing by small amounts if necessary.  This is because withdrawal symptoms can make our system more sensitive.  This may have happened to you.

 

I don't think you need to worry about serotonin toxicity.

 

Other members have had scans done and nothing has been found.  However, if it something that you are very concerned about and this causes stress, then getting the tests done can ease your mind.

 

It takes about 4 days for a dose to get to full level in the blood and a bit longer for it to register in the brain.

 

See Post #1 of this topic which provides a lot of information about reinstating:

 

about-reinstating-and-stabilizing-to-reduce-withdrawal-symptoms

 

 

From what I recall, I never took 5-HTP or Lexapro at the same time. I tried to use it as a replacement for Lexapro, but it really made no difference in terms of mental stability. I also agree about 30mg not causing it means that 10mg probably wouldn't either. Even with 5-HTP, I doubt 10mg of Lexapro is enough to do that. Lexapro is potent, but if I can handle 30mg, it seems strange a lower dosage would do it, even in a kindling event.

 

I'd like to have those tests you've mentioned, but I need a doctors order first. I think an fMRI or PET would definitively rule out any sort of brain disorder related to a bad reaction to psych meds, and I'd shut up after that about it, ha. The problems is the test has to happen, and nobody will order it yet. 

 

My problems started about 2 to 3 weeks into reinstatement. I believe I stopped taking it around October 12th 2020, but began taking it September 24, 2020. The symptoms didn't stop even after stopping usage though, which is the strange part. They got even worse after that. I had a day where my face felt like it was on fire about a month or so after I stopped taking Lexapro, it was terrible.

[ChessieCat]

4 minutes ago, rilexapro said:

I've been off Lexapro completely for a year, but my symptoms are still as persistent and chronic.

 

You cold turkeyed of 10mg Lexapro.  Not a small dose.

 

You might be surprised by how you are still feeling, however, there are many members here who have experienced something similar after cold turkeying a drug.  But recovery does happen. 

 

Cold Turkey and Too-Fast Tapers

 

protracted-withdrawal-or-paws-post-acute-withdrawal-syndrome-how-long-does-it-last

 

Link to a search for Cold Turkey in the Success Stories forum:

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/search/?q=cold turkey&quick=1&type=forums_topic&nodes=28

[Altostrata]

11 minutes ago, rilexapro said:

I felt emotionally very off, but not unhealthy and chronically sick like I do now.

 

That's right, your "psychiatric" symptoms were from your taking the drug inconsistently.

 

Then you cold-turkeyed a drug not once but 3 times. Taking psychiatric drugs inconsistently and going on and off abruptly stresses and upsets your nervous system. That is where your present bad symptoms come from.

 

 

[rilexapro]

17 minutes ago, ChessieCat said:

 

You cold turkeyed of 10mg Lexapro.  Not a small dose.

 

You might be surprised by how you are still feeling, however, there are many members here who have experienced something similar after cold turkeying a drug.  But recovery does happen. 

 

Cold Turkey and Too-Fast Tapers

 

protracted-withdrawal-or-paws-post-acute-withdrawal-syndrome-how-long-does-it-last

 

Link to a search for Cold Turkey in the Success Stories forum:

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/search/?q=cold turkey&quick=1&type=forums_topic&nodes=28

 

Is it common for the problems to still be very severe a year later? I felt very sick and nauseous today. I CT'd off 10mg after about 3 weeks because I felt extremely sick and unhealthy. The pain in the upper left area of my body never stops. It's in my face, neck, chest, and groin. I just don't get how Lexapro could cause this severe a reaction for so long.

 

I should have been smarter with my Lexapro usage, but the person giving me the medication was not supportive at all. The whole situation could have been dealt with better. I should have really stressed that Lexapro wasn't working for me anymore, and asked to see a different APRN. I feel so foolish and reckless. I just don't get it. I've never done drugs or drank, but I'm worse off than abusers of those things.

 

The chronic problems started when I tried retaking Lexapro though, not when I CT'd. It's not a standard story of adverse reaction. If it was kindling, it did a really bad number on me.

 

12 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

 

That's right, your "psychiatric" symptoms were from your taking the drug inconsistently.

 

Then you cold-turkeyed a drug not once but 3 times. Taking psychiatric drugs inconsistently and going on and off abruptly stresses and upsets your nervous system. That is where your present bad symptoms come from.

 

 

 

I just find it strange that it all started when I went back on 10mg, and not yo-yo'ing on and off 30mg, a more volatile dosage. It should have healed to some extent by now, but it really hasn't. I just don't know what a solution towards healing would be. Is it just waiting and letting time cause my body to heal?

[ChessieCat]

7 minutes ago, rilexapro said:

Is it common for the problems to still be very severe a year later?

 

Did you read the links I gave you?

[rilexapro]

1 minute ago, ChessieCat said:

 

Did you read the links I gave you?

 

I am right now, yes. Do the links mention anything about chronic neuropathy/muscle stiffness even after discontinuing usage? That's my biggest problem these days.

[Altostrata]

The 16,000 members of this site all have similar stories.

 

I believe we have told you repeatedly that the fallout from inconsistent dosing, cold turkey, etc. can last a very long time.

[ChessieCat]

8 minutes ago, rilexapro said:

Is it just waiting and letting time cause my body to heal?

 

Yes.  Unfortunately it may take a lot longer than you would like, but recovery is usually gradual so you might not notice some of the improvements.  It's more helpful to compare how you are currently feeling with how you felt at your worst, not comparing with how you felt at your best or how you want to feel.

 

And looking after yourself, including non drug techniques.  Stress management is very important.

 

Non-drug techniques to cope

 

1 minute ago, rilexapro said:

 

I am right now, yes. Do the links mention anything about chronic neuropathy/muscle stiffness even after discontinuing usage? That's my biggest problem these days.

 

There are many existing topic on SA.  Either use the site search function or use a search engine and add site:survivingantidepressants.org to the search term.

 

It might help if you see a physical therapist/physiotherapist and get exercises and stretches to do at home.  And a non-stimulating massage might help.  And 1/2 hour of gentle walking can help.  Some people find acupuncture helps but make sure it is calming.

 

Acupuncture - Posts #6 & #8 (not detox or stimulation)

[rilexapro]

8 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

The 16,000 members of this site all have similar stories.

 

I believe we have told you repeatedly that the fallout from inconsistent dosing, cold turkey, etc. can last a very long time.

 

I just hope there's a chance at complete recovery. When I try to think of memories I had before, like ones from childhood, they're a lot more fuzzy. It makes me very sad to think I've lost memories I had. Why not just do hard drugs if the result is the same, truly? I avoided that stuff all my life because I didn't want something like this to happen, and it happened anyway.

 

I've never heard of people recovering memories, so I don't know. I can remember events, but not specifics of memories, like what somebody said, their name, etc. It's depressing. I also can't remember my dreams anymore.

[ChessieCat]

Alto recovered after a cold turkey off Paxil.

 

I suggest you watch the video of Altostrata and listen to the podcast linked below which are in Alto's Introduction topic:

 

Alto Strata's Paxil Prolonged Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome (8 minutes)

 

mad-in-america-surviving-antidepressants-an-interview-with-alto

[ChessieCat]

And when you have time, this is from August 2020:

 

Medicating Normal - SurvivingAntidepressants.org Community Discussion video (1 hour and 26 minutes)

 

Alto is one of the panelists and gives a brief description of her withdrawal experience in this panel discussion which was shown after the presentation of the Surviving Antidepressants Presents showing of "Medicating Normal".

[rilexapro]

2 minutes ago, ChessieCat said:

And when you have time, this is from August 2020:

 

Medicating Normal - SurvivingAntidepressants.org Community Discussion video (1 hour and 26 minutes)

 

Alto is one of the panelists and gives a brief description of her withdrawal experience in this panel discussion which was shown after the presentation of the Surviving Antidepressants Presents showing of "Medicating Normal".

 

Thank you for the links. I will read them. If I can ask, what are your thoughts on articles like this?

 

A Kindled Brain: Long Term Lexapro Use Reactions

 

My Brain after Long Term Lexapro: Chemically Induced TBI

 

I ask only because it is the medication I was also on. Not trying to sensationalize or suggest recovery is impossible for me.