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Needofwisdom: Cold turkey, escitalopram withdrawal


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Needofwisdom

 

19 minutes ago, Go2zero said:

 

So great to read this. This is definitely a healing sign. Ok, be aware that it may go up and down. Healing comes in waves and windows. But what you tell are very good signs.

 

 

Reinstating is not exact science. Listening to your body tells you a lot. If not the most. If you feel OK with this low dosage, it might be better to stay on this. The lower the reinstatement the better (when it is working).

 

You can be proud of yourself! You are doing great!

 

Honestly Go2zero without the information on this forum, the users and specifically your help I would not be here right now. Thats how close I was. I prayed to God for help and somehow found this information and you specifically have saved my life thus far. That's the difference you have made. I owe you and this forum everything.

Zoloft Jan 2005 - July 2005 weaned off

Zoloft June 2008 - Jan 2009 weaned off

Escitalopram Jan 2019 - Nov 2020 weaned off

Escitalopram April 2021 6 days 10 and 20mg ct stopped

Escitalopram July 20th 2021 to July 30th reinstated 2.5mg discontinued ct after feeling no benefit worsening

Escitalopram August 21st 2021 .5mg reinstatement

Klonopin as needed 

Ativan as needed

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@Needofwisdom If you want to take 1 mg escitalopram per day, you can follow the same procedure as described in my last post.    - The only difference is that you crush a whole pill of 10mg a

We cannot fix inconsistent dosing from measurement variation. You will have to figure out how to do that yourself. Using the prescribed liquid will be more reliable.

@Needofwisdom It appears that to some extent, you are creating conditions that cause you to be anxious. You are the only person who can stop this. Working with a coach or psychotherapist can help.

  • Moderator

🙏

1993    Anafranil (Clomipramine) for a few months. Later in 1993 Paxil for a few months 1993- 2006      No medication

2006   Effexor, Cymbalta, some Benzo’s. All for short periods. Later in 2006 Lexapro (escitalopram) 10 mg and shortly after Wellbutrin XR 150mg, against side effects Lexapro 

Since 2006 until end of 2015: Several times on and off Lexapro and Wellbutrin and several slight dosage changes. Mostly taken dosages: 5mg Lexapro and 150mg Wellbutrin

2016  Dosage change Lexapro from 5mg to 2,5 mg. Wellbutrin stayed om 150mg

November 2016 – April 2017 Down from 2,5mg to 0,6mg Lexapro (in steps) without much problems. Wellbutrin down from 150mg to 66mg. Also without much problems.

April 2017 – March 2019       Lexapro 0,6 mg        April 2017 - August 2018       Wellbutrin in small steps down from 66mg in to 37,5 mg . Quite heavy WD after each step.

March 2019 – May 2019 Lexapro down from 0,6 to 0,3mg then Prozac to 0,6 mg switch because severe discontinuation effects (may also have been from Wellbutrin..)    

Wellbutrin down from 37,5mg to 35,3mg 

October 2019        Seroquel 12,5 mg for 4 weeks because of extreme sleeping problems, then weaning off in 2 weeks       Prozac up dosage to 1,2 mg

March 2020     Wellbutrin in 2 steps down from 35,3mg to 33,3mg   Extreme withdrawal affects during 8 months. Stopped tapering Wellbutrin  until total off Prozac. February 2020 – November 2020   Prozac down in steps from 1,2mg to 0,57mg. 

Jan 2021 Prozac down to:  0,55> 0,53>0,51mg,   Feb 0,47mg ,  Mar 0,42mg,   Apr 0,37, longer hold because of WD symptoms July 0,36 and hold again

 

Supplements: Fish Oil (3000mg), Magnesium 100 mg, 2 drops of Lavender Oil when feeling anxiety. 50mg of L-Theanine when severe discontinuation effects caused by Wellbutrin

 

Please note this is NOT a medical advice. Discuss all your medical issues with a doctor who understands psychical drugs and really knows how to withdraw from them. I wish that you will find one.

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Needofwisdom

Todays update August 29th day 9 of reinstatement. Yesterday after my morning update my symptoms had been going in the waves and windows pattern like I was told it would. A great window up until about 2 hours before my daily dose at 2pm i began to have the waves of negative symptoms hit me , depression like symptoms nothing too bad no big crashes no crying spells just a sort of muted overtone of flat emotion with the underlying presence of depression.

 

After 2pm dose my symptoms were numbed out but no lifting of mood just a flatline of emotion with negative depressive undertones throughout most of the day until night time a slight window opens up around the same time 8pm -10pm then i begin to feel sleepy. 

 

Fell asleep around 11:30pm woke up at 2am once again around 2 hours of sleep with vivid dreams and then paced around for 2 hours inside and outside could not fall asleep until 2 and half hours later 4:30am once again vivid dreams awoke 2 hours later 6:30am stayed awake for 30 minutes and awoke at 9:30am with body anxiety and worry/stress. It becomes apparent this is the cortisol spike in the morning which Go2zero mentioned.

 

My sleep patterns are worrying me not sure what is going on here if its the brain trying to find balance after all this because this was one of the early withdrawal symptoms i had gotten over for the past 4 months it was major insomnia not being able to sleep and then when finally crashing  waking up after a couple hours of sleep.

 

This time its different falling asleep is not so difficult but staying asleep throughout the entire night is impossible without the aid of sleeping pills which cause a worsening of symptoms the following day. 

Zoloft Jan 2005 - July 2005 weaned off

Zoloft June 2008 - Jan 2009 weaned off

Escitalopram Jan 2019 - Nov 2020 weaned off

Escitalopram April 2021 6 days 10 and 20mg ct stopped

Escitalopram July 20th 2021 to July 30th reinstated 2.5mg discontinued ct after feeling no benefit worsening

Escitalopram August 21st 2021 .5mg reinstatement

Klonopin as needed 

Ativan as needed

Link to post
Needofwisdom

Hello everyone I want to give an update on how things are going with the reinstatement dosage of .5 I want to find more posts on this wonderful forum on other people's experiences reinstating their ssri and compare them with mine.

 

 September 2nd 13 day of reinstatement been having the same all around pattern day to day waking up after going to sleep around 11:30 pm i wake up 2 hours later at 1:30am as if i had gotten a nights sleep then stay awake for 2 hours and fall back asleep wake up another 2 hours later. It seems like i cant fall asleep for longer than 2 hours last night i took a unisom sleeping pill with doxylamine succinate to see if it would help it made me fall asleep faster but still woke up 3 hours later. 

 

I am taking the .5mg in pill form and have made my own liquid as well. What i am noticing now is that after i take the .5mg instead of further relieving the symptoms it is making me more irritable and angry as if i was going back into the earlier parts of withdrawal where there was a lot of anger issues. I actually feel better in the mornings before i take it than i do around 1pm to 8pm after i take them. 

 

It seems to me that this doseage is now beginning to adjust itself and the mind numbing emotional blunting effect is starting to be a bit more pronounced with the way my nervous system is reacting to it. The rage / anger issues are really starting to remind me of when i was on it during the first run january 2020 to november 2020.  I am wondering now when is the marker for knowing you have stabilized and when is the time to know when you should begin to slowly taper off ? 

 

Are the sleep interuptions common with the reinstatement ? Should i change my dosing to earlier in the morning rather than middle of the day ? I remember before reinstating that i actually was able to fall asleep and sleep throughout the night. Now after reinstating i can only sleep in 2 hour periods.

Zoloft Jan 2005 - July 2005 weaned off

Zoloft June 2008 - Jan 2009 weaned off

Escitalopram Jan 2019 - Nov 2020 weaned off

Escitalopram April 2021 6 days 10 and 20mg ct stopped

Escitalopram July 20th 2021 to July 30th reinstated 2.5mg discontinued ct after feeling no benefit worsening

Escitalopram August 21st 2021 .5mg reinstatement

Klonopin as needed 

Ativan as needed

Link to post
  • Moderator
4 hours ago, Needofwisdom said:

 

I am taking the .5mg in pill form and have made my own liquid as well. What i am noticing now is that after i take the .5mg instead of further relieving the symptoms it is making me more irritable and angry as if i was going back into the earlier parts of withdrawal where there was a lot of anger issues. I actually feel better in the mornings before i take it than i do around 1pm to 8pm after i take them. 

What do you mean with taking the 0,5mg in pill form and also make your own liquid? How much are you taking from both?

 

If you are changing from pill to liquid you should do this in gradual steps. Like 75% pill/25% liquid for 4 days, then 50%pill/50% liquid for 4 days, then 25%pill/75 liquid for 4 days, then 100% liquid.

 

 

4 hours ago, Needofwisdom said:

Are the sleep interuptions common with the reinstatement ? Should i change my dosing to earlier in the morning rather than middle of the day ? I remember before reinstating that i actually was able to fall asleep and sleep throughout the night. Now after reinstating i can only sleep in 2 hour periods.

It is not common with reinstatement. But all the changes in dosages and stopping twice may have sensitized your nervous system. Insomnia is very often seen as WD system. You could try what happens if you would take the escitalopram in the morning. This may have a positive effect on sleep.  Better do not take sleeping pills!

 

 

Could you please update your signature with the reinstatements you did (dates and dosages). Please update your signature every time you make a change.

1993    Anafranil (Clomipramine) for a few months. Later in 1993 Paxil for a few months 1993- 2006      No medication

2006   Effexor, Cymbalta, some Benzo’s. All for short periods. Later in 2006 Lexapro (escitalopram) 10 mg and shortly after Wellbutrin XR 150mg, against side effects Lexapro 

Since 2006 until end of 2015: Several times on and off Lexapro and Wellbutrin and several slight dosage changes. Mostly taken dosages: 5mg Lexapro and 150mg Wellbutrin

2016  Dosage change Lexapro from 5mg to 2,5 mg. Wellbutrin stayed om 150mg

November 2016 – April 2017 Down from 2,5mg to 0,6mg Lexapro (in steps) without much problems. Wellbutrin down from 150mg to 66mg. Also without much problems.

April 2017 – March 2019       Lexapro 0,6 mg        April 2017 - August 2018       Wellbutrin in small steps down from 66mg in to 37,5 mg . Quite heavy WD after each step.

March 2019 – May 2019 Lexapro down from 0,6 to 0,3mg then Prozac to 0,6 mg switch because severe discontinuation effects (may also have been from Wellbutrin..)    

Wellbutrin down from 37,5mg to 35,3mg 

October 2019        Seroquel 12,5 mg for 4 weeks because of extreme sleeping problems, then weaning off in 2 weeks       Prozac up dosage to 1,2 mg

March 2020     Wellbutrin in 2 steps down from 35,3mg to 33,3mg   Extreme withdrawal affects during 8 months. Stopped tapering Wellbutrin  until total off Prozac. February 2020 – November 2020   Prozac down in steps from 1,2mg to 0,57mg. 

Jan 2021 Prozac down to:  0,55> 0,53>0,51mg,   Feb 0,47mg ,  Mar 0,42mg,   Apr 0,37, longer hold because of WD symptoms July 0,36 and hold again

 

Supplements: Fish Oil (3000mg), Magnesium 100 mg, 2 drops of Lavender Oil when feeling anxiety. 50mg of L-Theanine when severe discontinuation effects caused by Wellbutrin

 

Please note this is NOT a medical advice. Discuss all your medical issues with a doctor who understands psychical drugs and really knows how to withdraw from them. I wish that you will find one.

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Needofwisdom
1 minute ago, Go2zero said:

What do you mean with taking the 0,5mg in pill form and also make your own liquid? How much are you taking from both?

 

If you are changing from pill to liquid you should do this in gradual steps. Like 75% pill/25% liquid for 4 days, then 50%pill/50% liquid for 4 days, then 25%pill/75 liquid for 4 days, then 100% liquid.

 

Hello Go2zero good to hear from you thank you for your reply. Currently I am on the pill form weighing out doses of 7mg or roughly .5mg of the escitalopram but as time goes on its becoming harder to accurately measure out these doseages. Sometimes i see what i measured out as .007g previously then turns into a different number later like .008 or .009 a day later. I am calibrating before each measurement and triple checking.

 

As for the liquid form i have created my own liquid form as per your instructions crushing a 10mg pill mixing with 10ml water. I have not taken any liquid dose yet because i dont want to mess with it without making sure i am doing it right. So far what i see wrong is the residue(dust) being left on the crusher and some tiny amount of the pill not being fully crushed in the crusher yet mixed in the 10ml bottle worried about uneven dosing. I now have access to the 5ml 5mg liquid escitalopram but from what i read is that some people do not react well to it that worries me. The gradual changes from pill to liquid also make it more difficult to do since im on such a low dose currently how to accurately dose 75%in pill then 25% of liquid of .5mg for 4 days seems challenging to do accurately. That would be .00525g in pill and then 25% of  .5ml or .125ml. This is insanity i cannot believe i was not warned of what kind of hell that i would have to deal with when i was introduced to this poison. 

 

2 minutes ago, Go2zero said:

 

It is not common with reinstatement. But all the changes in dosages and stopping twice may have sensitized your nervous system. Insomnia is very often seen as WD system. You could try what happens if you would take the escitalopram in the morning. This may have a positive effect on sleep.  Better do not take sleeping pills!

 

 

Could you please update your signature with the reinstatements you did (dates and dosages). Please update your signature every time you make a change.

 

Thank you this is one of the symptoms i had gotten past during the first few months of withdrawal the insomnia and sleep interuptions. Before this last reinstatement i had been able to sleep throughout the entire night now i have no trouble falling asleep but i am wide awake after 2 hours of falling asleep. 

 

I am wondering should i change the time of my doseage gradually or should i just go ahead and start taking it in the morning the next day.  I will go ahead and update my signature with current reinstatement and previous reinstatement in July. 

Zoloft Jan 2005 - July 2005 weaned off

Zoloft June 2008 - Jan 2009 weaned off

Escitalopram Jan 2019 - Nov 2020 weaned off

Escitalopram April 2021 6 days 10 and 20mg ct stopped

Escitalopram July 20th 2021 to July 30th reinstated 2.5mg discontinued ct after feeling no benefit worsening

Escitalopram August 21st 2021 .5mg reinstatement

Klonopin as needed 

Ativan as needed

Link to post
  • Moderator
3 minutes ago, Needofwisdom said:

As for the liquid form i have created my own liquid form as per your instructions crushing a 10mg pill mixing with 10ml water. I have not taken any liquid dose yet because i dont want to mess with it without making sure i am doing it right. So far what i see wrong is the residue(dust) being left on the crusher and some tiny amount of the pill not being fully crushed in the crusher yet mixed in the 10ml bottle worried about uneven dosing. I now have access to the 5ml 5mg liquid escitalopram but from what i read is that some people do not react well to it that worries me. The gradual changes from pill to liquid also make it more difficult to do since im on such a low dose currently how to accurately dose 75%in pill then 25% of liquid of .5mg for 4 days seems challenging to do accurately. That would be .00525g in pill and then 25% of  .5ml or .125ml. This is insanity i cannot believe i was not warned of what kind of hell that i would have to deal with when i was introduced to this poison. 

 

Do the parts of the pill that are not fully crushed dissolve in the water when you shake the bottle firmly?  You could use a small (clean) brush to clean the crusher over a piece of clean paper. The powder that falls on the paper can be put in the bottle as well then.

 

 

14 minutes ago, Needofwisdom said:

The gradual changes from pill to liquid also make it more difficult to do since im on such a low dose currently how to accurately dose 75%in pill then 25% of liquid of .5mg for 4 days seems challenging to do accurately. That would be .00525g in pill and then 25% of  .5ml or .125ml.

 

You can weigh the amount for 4 days in dry pill weight. And then divide it by eye over 4 more or less equal parts.  For the liquid you should be able to dose quite accurately with the 1 ml syringe. If you can't , you could make a liquid with half a crushed pill in 10 ml water. Then you have already half the strength of the liquid. 

19 minutes ago, Needofwisdom said:

I am wondering should i change the time of my doseage gradually or should i just go ahead and start taking it in the morning the next day.

I would do it gradually over 2-3 days

1993    Anafranil (Clomipramine) for a few months. Later in 1993 Paxil for a few months 1993- 2006      No medication

2006   Effexor, Cymbalta, some Benzo’s. All for short periods. Later in 2006 Lexapro (escitalopram) 10 mg and shortly after Wellbutrin XR 150mg, against side effects Lexapro 

Since 2006 until end of 2015: Several times on and off Lexapro and Wellbutrin and several slight dosage changes. Mostly taken dosages: 5mg Lexapro and 150mg Wellbutrin

2016  Dosage change Lexapro from 5mg to 2,5 mg. Wellbutrin stayed om 150mg

November 2016 – April 2017 Down from 2,5mg to 0,6mg Lexapro (in steps) without much problems. Wellbutrin down from 150mg to 66mg. Also without much problems.

April 2017 – March 2019       Lexapro 0,6 mg        April 2017 - August 2018       Wellbutrin in small steps down from 66mg in to 37,5 mg . Quite heavy WD after each step.

March 2019 – May 2019 Lexapro down from 0,6 to 0,3mg then Prozac to 0,6 mg switch because severe discontinuation effects (may also have been from Wellbutrin..)    

Wellbutrin down from 37,5mg to 35,3mg 

October 2019        Seroquel 12,5 mg for 4 weeks because of extreme sleeping problems, then weaning off in 2 weeks       Prozac up dosage to 1,2 mg

March 2020     Wellbutrin in 2 steps down from 35,3mg to 33,3mg   Extreme withdrawal affects during 8 months. Stopped tapering Wellbutrin  until total off Prozac. February 2020 – November 2020   Prozac down in steps from 1,2mg to 0,57mg. 

Jan 2021 Prozac down to:  0,55> 0,53>0,51mg,   Feb 0,47mg ,  Mar 0,42mg,   Apr 0,37, longer hold because of WD symptoms July 0,36 and hold again

 

Supplements: Fish Oil (3000mg), Magnesium 100 mg, 2 drops of Lavender Oil when feeling anxiety. 50mg of L-Theanine when severe discontinuation effects caused by Wellbutrin

 

Please note this is NOT a medical advice. Discuss all your medical issues with a doctor who understands psychical drugs and really knows how to withdraw from them. I wish that you will find one.

Link to post
Needofwisdom
18 hours ago, Go2zero said:

Do the parts of the pill that are not fully crushed dissolve in the water when you shake the bottle firmly?  You could use a small (clean) brush to clean the crusher over a piece of clean paper. The powder that falls on the paper can be put in the bottle as well then.

 

Thank you Go2zero the bottles im using are amber in color so im not sure if they dissolve fully. I will place the crushed contents in clear containers first then transfer them to the 10ml amber containers. As for the liquid escitalopram i have access to it in the future. I am just worried about the liquid prescription affecting me in a way that the pill doesnt. I am having nightmares every night and only sleeping in 2 hour cycles.

18 hours ago, Go2zero said:

 

You can weigh the amount for 4 days in dry pill weight. And then divide it by eye over 4 more or less equal parts.  For the liquid you should be able to dose quite accurately with the 1 ml syringe. If you can't , you could make a liquid with half a crushed pill in 10 ml water. Then you have already half the strength of the liquid. 

 

Thank you so much for all your help and knowledge. I would never be able to do this without your help and this forum. For .5mg pill form i take a quarter of that .125mg per day then i take .75ml in the 1ml syringe of the half crushed pill in a 10ml container from what i understand for 4 days then switch to half pill .250mg pill and .50ml for the next for days. 

 

18 hours ago, Go2zero said:

 

I would do it gradually over 2-3 days

 

Thank you today i took the dose 1 hour and half earlier than the previous day at 11:30am. These nightmares and 2 hour sleep patterns are quite disturbing. This whole experience has been a living hell. I am more stable during the now though and my emotions and breakdowns have minimized. At certain times i feel close to normal at other times i can feel the symptoms hitting me again.

 

So far supplements have been aiding me l theanine, fish oil, NAC, lions mane, turmeric with meals and now i have added 

ashwagandha which has been helping a lot to calm my nervous system. I also tried   I will continue to update my situation.  I dont know how long it will take to stabilize but i do know that this has been working to alleviate symptoms. 

Zoloft Jan 2005 - July 2005 weaned off

Zoloft June 2008 - Jan 2009 weaned off

Escitalopram Jan 2019 - Nov 2020 weaned off

Escitalopram April 2021 6 days 10 and 20mg ct stopped

Escitalopram July 20th 2021 to July 30th reinstated 2.5mg discontinued ct after feeling no benefit worsening

Escitalopram August 21st 2021 .5mg reinstatement

Klonopin as needed 

Ativan as needed

Link to post
  • Moderator
5 hours ago, Needofwisdom said:

I am more stable during the now though and my emotions and breakdowns have minimized. At certain times i feel close to normal at other times i can feel the symptoms hitting me again.

 

 

These are really good signs of healing. It may go slow, but every improvement is a step forward! And sometimes you will make steps backwards. But you will notice that after that you go further forward than you were before... This is how healing from WD goes....

5 hours ago, Needofwisdom said:

and now i have added 

ashwagandha which has been helping a lot to calm my nervous system.

 

Best do not take ashwagandha! In the beginning it may seem to work. But for most people in WD it gives bad reactions and symptoms after a while! 

1993    Anafranil (Clomipramine) for a few months. Later in 1993 Paxil for a few months 1993- 2006      No medication

2006   Effexor, Cymbalta, some Benzo’s. All for short periods. Later in 2006 Lexapro (escitalopram) 10 mg and shortly after Wellbutrin XR 150mg, against side effects Lexapro 

Since 2006 until end of 2015: Several times on and off Lexapro and Wellbutrin and several slight dosage changes. Mostly taken dosages: 5mg Lexapro and 150mg Wellbutrin

2016  Dosage change Lexapro from 5mg to 2,5 mg. Wellbutrin stayed om 150mg

November 2016 – April 2017 Down from 2,5mg to 0,6mg Lexapro (in steps) without much problems. Wellbutrin down from 150mg to 66mg. Also without much problems.

April 2017 – March 2019       Lexapro 0,6 mg        April 2017 - August 2018       Wellbutrin in small steps down from 66mg in to 37,5 mg . Quite heavy WD after each step.

March 2019 – May 2019 Lexapro down from 0,6 to 0,3mg then Prozac to 0,6 mg switch because severe discontinuation effects (may also have been from Wellbutrin..)    

Wellbutrin down from 37,5mg to 35,3mg 

October 2019        Seroquel 12,5 mg for 4 weeks because of extreme sleeping problems, then weaning off in 2 weeks       Prozac up dosage to 1,2 mg

March 2020     Wellbutrin in 2 steps down from 35,3mg to 33,3mg   Extreme withdrawal affects during 8 months. Stopped tapering Wellbutrin  until total off Prozac. February 2020 – November 2020   Prozac down in steps from 1,2mg to 0,57mg. 

Jan 2021 Prozac down to:  0,55> 0,53>0,51mg,   Feb 0,47mg ,  Mar 0,42mg,   Apr 0,37, longer hold because of WD symptoms July 0,36 and hold again

 

Supplements: Fish Oil (3000mg), Magnesium 100 mg, 2 drops of Lavender Oil when feeling anxiety. 50mg of L-Theanine when severe discontinuation effects caused by Wellbutrin

 

Please note this is NOT a medical advice. Discuss all your medical issues with a doctor who understands psychical drugs and really knows how to withdraw from them. I wish that you will find one.

Link to post
Needofwisdom
7 hours ago, Go2zero said:

 

These are really good signs of healing. It may go slow, but every improvement is a step forward! And sometimes you will make steps backwards. But you will notice that after that you go further forward than you were before... This is how healing from WD goes....

 

Thank you so much Go2zero at times I feel like my improvements are at a stand still especially when im hit with the waves of symptoms and i foolishly take my progress for granted but then i just look back to a month ago or a couple weeks ago and realize just how much progress has come along the way. Even though its an up and down journey i know sticking to it and giving it time is the key. Where I was a couple weeks ago and where I am today is night and day. I appreciate your help so much Go2zero.

 

7 hours ago, Go2zero said:

 

Best do not take ashwagandha! In the beginning it may seem to work. But for most people in WD it gives bad reactions and symptoms after a while! 

 

Ok thank you for the heads up i will stop using it, I dont want to take any risks. Is there any problems using Gingko Biloba for memory or Vitamin B12 for fatigue ? I picked some up today haven't used them yet.

Zoloft Jan 2005 - July 2005 weaned off

Zoloft June 2008 - Jan 2009 weaned off

Escitalopram Jan 2019 - Nov 2020 weaned off

Escitalopram April 2021 6 days 10 and 20mg ct stopped

Escitalopram July 20th 2021 to July 30th reinstated 2.5mg discontinued ct after feeling no benefit worsening

Escitalopram August 21st 2021 .5mg reinstatement

Klonopin as needed 

Ativan as needed

Link to post
  • Moderator
36 minutes ago, Needofwisdom said:

Thank you so much Go2zero at times I feel like my improvements are at a stand still especially when im hit with the waves of symptoms and i foolishly take my progress for granted but then i just look back to a month ago or a couple weeks ago and realize just how much progress has come along the way. Even though its an up and down journey i know sticking to it and giving it time is the key. Where I was a couple weeks ago and where I am today is night and day. I appreciate your help so much Go2zero.

 

 

You are doing good!  What may help (I do it for many years already) is keeping a diary where you write down the dosages end meds you are taking and you write down how you feel. The improvements you make, the waves and windows you experience (including all symptoms at that moment).

 

Usually I do not write every day, but I write with every change in feelings and symptoms. And also I write down every dosage change I make.

 

This can really help. Sometimes when we are in a wave, we forget how we felt during the good periods (windows). We can't get there sometimes when we are in a deep wave. And we may see everything darker than it was before. It is also good to see for you self that waves come and GO. And that windows also come again!

 

Through this diary I have also been able to find specific patterns in WD symptoms when changing meds or dosages. Sometimes these symptoms come months after a change.  Also finding these patterns have helped me a lot in making my tapering process more effective and bearable.

 

 

1993    Anafranil (Clomipramine) for a few months. Later in 1993 Paxil for a few months 1993- 2006      No medication

2006   Effexor, Cymbalta, some Benzo’s. All for short periods. Later in 2006 Lexapro (escitalopram) 10 mg and shortly after Wellbutrin XR 150mg, against side effects Lexapro 

Since 2006 until end of 2015: Several times on and off Lexapro and Wellbutrin and several slight dosage changes. Mostly taken dosages: 5mg Lexapro and 150mg Wellbutrin

2016  Dosage change Lexapro from 5mg to 2,5 mg. Wellbutrin stayed om 150mg

November 2016 – April 2017 Down from 2,5mg to 0,6mg Lexapro (in steps) without much problems. Wellbutrin down from 150mg to 66mg. Also without much problems.

April 2017 – March 2019       Lexapro 0,6 mg        April 2017 - August 2018       Wellbutrin in small steps down from 66mg in to 37,5 mg . Quite heavy WD after each step.

March 2019 – May 2019 Lexapro down from 0,6 to 0,3mg then Prozac to 0,6 mg switch because severe discontinuation effects (may also have been from Wellbutrin..)    

Wellbutrin down from 37,5mg to 35,3mg 

October 2019        Seroquel 12,5 mg for 4 weeks because of extreme sleeping problems, then weaning off in 2 weeks       Prozac up dosage to 1,2 mg

March 2020     Wellbutrin in 2 steps down from 35,3mg to 33,3mg   Extreme withdrawal affects during 8 months. Stopped tapering Wellbutrin  until total off Prozac. February 2020 – November 2020   Prozac down in steps from 1,2mg to 0,57mg. 

Jan 2021 Prozac down to:  0,55> 0,53>0,51mg,   Feb 0,47mg ,  Mar 0,42mg,   Apr 0,37, longer hold because of WD symptoms July 0,36 and hold again

 

Supplements: Fish Oil (3000mg), Magnesium 100 mg, 2 drops of Lavender Oil when feeling anxiety. 50mg of L-Theanine when severe discontinuation effects caused by Wellbutrin

 

Please note this is NOT a medical advice. Discuss all your medical issues with a doctor who understands psychical drugs and really knows how to withdraw from them. I wish that you will find one.

Link to post
  • Moderator
1 hour ago, Needofwisdom said:

Ok thank you for the heads up i will stop using it, I dont want to take any risks. Is there any problems using Gingko Biloba for memory or Vitamin B12 for fatigue ? I picked some up today haven't used them yet.

 

I have no experience with Gingko Biloba. But a quick search already gives negative advice for using it together with the kind of meds most members (including you) are taking here.

 

https://www.mayoclinic.org/drugs-supplements-ginkgo/art-20362032

 

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30659561/

 

We have seen a lot of adverse reactions when taking supplements. Lots of supplements can give negative reactions when taking psychotropic drugs. When in withdrawal they often make things worse. 

 

You better stop trying to find easy fix solutions or wonderpills. There are NONE of these unfortunately. 

 

What may help is Fish Oil or Magnesium. These are the only supplements we recommend here.

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/36-king-of-supplements-omega-3-fatty-acids-fish-oil/?tab=comments#comment-44

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/15483-magnesium-natures-calcium-channel-blocker/?tab=comments#comment-11734

 

Here is more info about vitamin B12. I think this may be OK to use, but I do not know if it may help or if it could give adverse reactions when in WD.

 

We advice to take supplements as little as needed. When we are in WD and have lots of changing WD symptoms, it can be totally unclear what is causing symptoms if one is adding/stopping/changing dosages of several meds or supplements.

 

I have quite good results with ORGANIC Lavender essential oil. I take it just now and then (only when really needed). It may help when experiencing anxiety and stress through withdrawal. I put 2-4 drops in a glass of water and drink it.

 

I start with 2 drops and see if it gives relief. You can feel the effect within 30 minutes. If not, you can take a 3rd drop and wait for another 30 minutes. If not enough effect you can take a 4th drop after another 30 minutes. For some members i gives relief, for others it does not work... Until now there is nothing known about negative effects. But only use when needed. Otherwise it might not work that good when you really need it....

 

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/6632-the-rule-of-3kis-keep-it-simple-keep-it-slow-keep-it-stable/?tab=comments#comment-525233

 

1993    Anafranil (Clomipramine) for a few months. Later in 1993 Paxil for a few months 1993- 2006      No medication

2006   Effexor, Cymbalta, some Benzo’s. All for short periods. Later in 2006 Lexapro (escitalopram) 10 mg and shortly after Wellbutrin XR 150mg, against side effects Lexapro 

Since 2006 until end of 2015: Several times on and off Lexapro and Wellbutrin and several slight dosage changes. Mostly taken dosages: 5mg Lexapro and 150mg Wellbutrin

2016  Dosage change Lexapro from 5mg to 2,5 mg. Wellbutrin stayed om 150mg

November 2016 – April 2017 Down from 2,5mg to 0,6mg Lexapro (in steps) without much problems. Wellbutrin down from 150mg to 66mg. Also without much problems.

April 2017 – March 2019       Lexapro 0,6 mg        April 2017 - August 2018       Wellbutrin in small steps down from 66mg in to 37,5 mg . Quite heavy WD after each step.

March 2019 – May 2019 Lexapro down from 0,6 to 0,3mg then Prozac to 0,6 mg switch because severe discontinuation effects (may also have been from Wellbutrin..)    

Wellbutrin down from 37,5mg to 35,3mg 

October 2019        Seroquel 12,5 mg for 4 weeks because of extreme sleeping problems, then weaning off in 2 weeks       Prozac up dosage to 1,2 mg

March 2020     Wellbutrin in 2 steps down from 35,3mg to 33,3mg   Extreme withdrawal affects during 8 months. Stopped tapering Wellbutrin  until total off Prozac. February 2020 – November 2020   Prozac down in steps from 1,2mg to 0,57mg. 

Jan 2021 Prozac down to:  0,55> 0,53>0,51mg,   Feb 0,47mg ,  Mar 0,42mg,   Apr 0,37, longer hold because of WD symptoms July 0,36 and hold again

 

Supplements: Fish Oil (3000mg), Magnesium 100 mg, 2 drops of Lavender Oil when feeling anxiety. 50mg of L-Theanine when severe discontinuation effects caused by Wellbutrin

 

Please note this is NOT a medical advice. Discuss all your medical issues with a doctor who understands psychical drugs and really knows how to withdraw from them. I wish that you will find one.

Link to post
Needofwisdom
9 hours ago, Go2zero said:

 

You are doing good!  What may help (I do it for many years already) is keeping a diary where you write down the dosages end meds you are taking and you write down how you feel. The improvements you make, the waves and windows you experience (including all symptoms at that moment).

 

Usually I do not write every day, but I write with every change in feelings and symptoms. And also I write down every dosage change I make.

 

This can really help. Sometimes when we are in a wave, we forget how we felt during the good periods (windows). We can't get there sometimes when we are in a deep wave. And we may see everything darker than it was before. It is also good to see for you self that waves come and GO. And that windows also come again!

 

Through this diary I have also been able to find specific patterns in WD symptoms when changing meds or dosages. Sometimes these symptoms come months after a change.  Also finding these patterns have helped me a lot in making my tapering process more effective and bearable.

 

 

 

Thank you Go2zero I am trying everyday to improve and I am keeping a video diary everyday on how I am doing what supplements I am taking and how they are affecting me, my doseages and times of intake. I will make notes of this as well. Last night I took 100mg of Magnesium Citrate i went out and bought Magnesium Citrate because I realized that I was using Magnesium oxide before which has poor absorbability. After taking Magnesium Citrate at night i had a more restful sleep than the previous nights. Even though i still awoke 2 hours after falling asleep i found it easirr to fall back asleep,slept for longer and didnt remember having nightmares.

 

 

8 hours ago, Go2zero said:

 

I have no experience with Gingko Biloba. But a quick search already gives negative advice for using it together with the kind of meds most members (including you) are taking here.

 

https://www.mayoclinic.org/drugs-supplements-ginkgo/art-20362032

 

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30659561/

 

We have seen a lot of adverse reactions when taking supplements. Lots of supplements can give negative reactions when taking psychotropic drugs. When in withdrawal they often make things worse. 

 

You better stop trying to find easy fix solutions or wonderpills. There are NONE of these unfortunately. 

 

What may help is Fish Oil or Magnesium. These are the only supplements we recommend here.

 

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/36-king-of-supplements-omega-3-fatty-acids-fish-oil/?tab=comments#comment-44

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/15483-magnesium-natures-calcium-channel-blocker/?tab=comments#comment-11734

 

Here is more info about vitamin B12. I think this may be OK to use, but I do not know if it may help or if it could give adverse reactions when in WD.

 

We advice to take supplements as little as needed. When we are in WD and have lots of changing WD symptoms, it can be totally unclear what is causing symptoms if one is adding/stopping/changing dosages of several meds or supplements.

 

I have quite good results with ORGANIC Lavender essential oil. I take it just now and then (only when really needed). It may help when experiencing anxiety and stress through withdrawal. I put 2-4 drops in a glass of water and drink it.

 

I start with 2 drops and see if it gives relief. You can feel the effect within 30 minutes. If not, you can take a 3rd drop and wait for another 30 minutes. If not enough effect you can take a 4th drop after another 30 minutes. For some members i gives relief, for others it does not work... Until now there is nothing known about negative effects. But only use when needed. Otherwise it might not work that good when you really need it....

 

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/6632-the-rule-of-3kis-keep-it-simple-keep-it-slow-keep-it-stable/?tab=comments#comment-525233

 

 

Thank you Go2zero i will not take the gingko biloba. I looked into organic lavender oil and products like this one

 

https://www.amazon.com/Organic-Lavender-Essential-Oil-Aromatherapy/dp/B07XC4DQNC/ref=mp_s_a_1_1_sspa?dchild=1&hasWorkingJavascript=1&keywords=organic+lavender+oil&qid=1630781598&sr=8-1-spons&psc=1&spLa=ZW5jcnlwdGVkUXVhbGlmaWVyPUEzNkNVQjE5TTBRVFNYJmVuY3J5cHRlZElkPUEwNTA1NjA2MUFMOTVWODYxQUVGRiZlbmNyeXB0ZWRBZElkPUEwMzIxNjEwM1BGWDJOMlczQU9WOSZ3aWRnZXROYW1lPXNwX3Bob25lX3NlYXJjaF9hdGYmYWN0aW9uPWNsaWNrUmVkaXJlY3QmZG9Ob3RMb2dDbGljaz10cnVl

 

mention its for external use only so i wasnt sure if I should drink it or use it as aromatherapy. 

 

Some supplements like l theanine, gaba, NAC, fish oil,lions mane i have seen positive results from during the withdrawals. 

 

Before i started reinstatement i would also use L tryptophan which helped me out with my mood. In retrospect i wonder how much the l tryptophan was masking my symptoms and once removed caused me to crash harder. Of course this is all speculation but i did see positive results when i was using it consistently. Now that im back on the ssri even at a very low dose im weary of any interactions it may cause. 

Zoloft Jan 2005 - July 2005 weaned off

Zoloft June 2008 - Jan 2009 weaned off

Escitalopram Jan 2019 - Nov 2020 weaned off

Escitalopram April 2021 6 days 10 and 20mg ct stopped

Escitalopram July 20th 2021 to July 30th reinstated 2.5mg discontinued ct after feeling no benefit worsening

Escitalopram August 21st 2021 .5mg reinstatement

Klonopin as needed 

Ativan as needed

Link to post
  • Moderator
6 hours ago, Needofwisdom said:

mention its for external use only so i wasnt sure if I should drink it or use it as aromatherapy. 

 Just Google https://www.google.com/search?client=safari&rls=en&q=lavender+oil+internal+use&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8 and you will find it is safe to use internally.

 

 

1993    Anafranil (Clomipramine) for a few months. Later in 1993 Paxil for a few months 1993- 2006      No medication

2006   Effexor, Cymbalta, some Benzo’s. All for short periods. Later in 2006 Lexapro (escitalopram) 10 mg and shortly after Wellbutrin XR 150mg, against side effects Lexapro 

Since 2006 until end of 2015: Several times on and off Lexapro and Wellbutrin and several slight dosage changes. Mostly taken dosages: 5mg Lexapro and 150mg Wellbutrin

2016  Dosage change Lexapro from 5mg to 2,5 mg. Wellbutrin stayed om 150mg

November 2016 – April 2017 Down from 2,5mg to 0,6mg Lexapro (in steps) without much problems. Wellbutrin down from 150mg to 66mg. Also without much problems.

April 2017 – March 2019       Lexapro 0,6 mg        April 2017 - August 2018       Wellbutrin in small steps down from 66mg in to 37,5 mg . Quite heavy WD after each step.

March 2019 – May 2019 Lexapro down from 0,6 to 0,3mg then Prozac to 0,6 mg switch because severe discontinuation effects (may also have been from Wellbutrin..)    

Wellbutrin down from 37,5mg to 35,3mg 

October 2019        Seroquel 12,5 mg for 4 weeks because of extreme sleeping problems, then weaning off in 2 weeks       Prozac up dosage to 1,2 mg

March 2020     Wellbutrin in 2 steps down from 35,3mg to 33,3mg   Extreme withdrawal affects during 8 months. Stopped tapering Wellbutrin  until total off Prozac. February 2020 – November 2020   Prozac down in steps from 1,2mg to 0,57mg. 

Jan 2021 Prozac down to:  0,55> 0,53>0,51mg,   Feb 0,47mg ,  Mar 0,42mg,   Apr 0,37, longer hold because of WD symptoms July 0,36 and hold again

 

Supplements: Fish Oil (3000mg), Magnesium 100 mg, 2 drops of Lavender Oil when feeling anxiety. 50mg of L-Theanine when severe discontinuation effects caused by Wellbutrin

 

Please note this is NOT a medical advice. Discuss all your medical issues with a doctor who understands psychical drugs and really knows how to withdraw from them. I wish that you will find one.

Link to post
Needofwisdom
2 hours ago, Go2zero said:

 Just Google https://www.google.com/search?client=safari&rls=en&q=lavender+oil+internal+use&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8 and you will find it is safe to use internally.

 

 

 

Thank you Go2zero i will try it out

Zoloft Jan 2005 - July 2005 weaned off

Zoloft June 2008 - Jan 2009 weaned off

Escitalopram Jan 2019 - Nov 2020 weaned off

Escitalopram April 2021 6 days 10 and 20mg ct stopped

Escitalopram July 20th 2021 to July 30th reinstated 2.5mg discontinued ct after feeling no benefit worsening

Escitalopram August 21st 2021 .5mg reinstatement

Klonopin as needed 

Ativan as needed

Link to post
Needofwisdom

Update on my current situation yesterday was a tough day it seems no matter what i try i cant get my brain to sleep for longer than 2 hours at a time while on this low dose .5mg escitalopram. Before reinstatement i had gotten past the insomnia and sleep interruption portion of the withdrawal now Its the same thing every night vivid dreams/nightmares and 2 hour sleep cycles its been 17 days now of reinstatement. Falling asleep not so much of a problem but staying asleep for longer than 2 hours is very difficult. Wake up with night sweats and anxiety a lot of times. 

 

During the day the depression is  evident and while i am much more stable in terms of all the withdrawal symptoms being there all at once ( crying spells, emotional breakdowns,crazy mood drops,extreme depression,dread and anxiety) the weight of all this happening to me, the fatigue and the depression itself combined with the loss of interest and motivation has left me feeling like even if I do slowly wean off this dose I will be in a strong depression. Can anyone give advice or experience on how one would feel after stabilizing and slowly weaning off? At this point i feel like the medication is working at diminishing the extremely negative thinking but at the same time its also keeping me from experiencing the real positivity behind the progress thats been happening.

 

I have been incorporating exercise into my daily routine. Doing pushups,situps,squats and have noticed positive results from doing that. Its like a trap going through this like being stuck in quicksand and you feel like you have no choice. The more i stay inside and dwell in my own pain the less progress i make and the worst i feel. I want to try to push myself to go out and do more outside.

 

 

Zoloft Jan 2005 - July 2005 weaned off

Zoloft June 2008 - Jan 2009 weaned off

Escitalopram Jan 2019 - Nov 2020 weaned off

Escitalopram April 2021 6 days 10 and 20mg ct stopped

Escitalopram July 20th 2021 to July 30th reinstated 2.5mg discontinued ct after feeling no benefit worsening

Escitalopram August 21st 2021 .5mg reinstatement

Klonopin as needed 

Ativan as needed

Link to post
  • Moderator
26 minutes ago, Needofwisdom said:

Falling asleep not so much of a problem but staying asleep for longer than 2 hours is very difficult. Wake up with night sweats and anxiety a lot of times. 

 

 

These are common WD symptoms. I periods of healing insomnia often is a sign that we are still in the process of healing and stabilization.

 

How do you feel compared to 17 days ago (before reinstatement)? Please check your posts and (video) journals to be sure of the differences.

29 minutes ago, Needofwisdom said:

During the day the depression is  evident and while i am much more stable in terms of all the withdrawal symptoms being there all at once ( crying spells, emotional breakdowns,crazy mood drops,extreme depression,dread and anxiety) the weight of all this happening to me, the fatigue and the depression itself combined with the loss of interest and motivation has left me feeling like even if I do slowly wean off this dose I will be in a strong depression.

 

This also sounds like WD symptoms. It is often very hard to tell whether symptoms come from withdrawal or relapse... Doctors most often will say it is relapse. Lots of people in WD find out later it was WD (after getting more windows). Symptoms of relapse and withdrawal can be quite similar. But when more windows are coming this is a very good sign. Ans most often a sign it is WD.

 

36 minutes ago, Needofwisdom said:

Can anyone give advice or experience on how one would feel after stabilizing and slowly weaning off?

 

Don't expect wonders like healing and totally stabilizing  in a few weeks. One will slowly get better. 2 steps forward, 1 backwards, and so on.

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/23081-are-we-there-yet-how-long-is-withdrawal-going-to-take/?tab=comments#comment-492493

 

 

39 minutes ago, Needofwisdom said:

I have been incorporating exercise into my daily routine. Doing pushups,situps,squats and have noticed positive results from doing that. Its like a trap going through this like being stuck in quicksand and you feel like you have no choice. The more i stay inside and dwell in my own pain the less progress i make and the worst i feel. I want to try to push myself to go out and do more outside.

 

 

This is very good and important!  Do things you like or used to like (even when you do not like them now because of WD)

1993    Anafranil (Clomipramine) for a few months. Later in 1993 Paxil for a few months 1993- 2006      No medication

2006   Effexor, Cymbalta, some Benzo’s. All for short periods. Later in 2006 Lexapro (escitalopram) 10 mg and shortly after Wellbutrin XR 150mg, against side effects Lexapro 

Since 2006 until end of 2015: Several times on and off Lexapro and Wellbutrin and several slight dosage changes. Mostly taken dosages: 5mg Lexapro and 150mg Wellbutrin

2016  Dosage change Lexapro from 5mg to 2,5 mg. Wellbutrin stayed om 150mg

November 2016 – April 2017 Down from 2,5mg to 0,6mg Lexapro (in steps) without much problems. Wellbutrin down from 150mg to 66mg. Also without much problems.

April 2017 – March 2019       Lexapro 0,6 mg        April 2017 - August 2018       Wellbutrin in small steps down from 66mg in to 37,5 mg . Quite heavy WD after each step.

March 2019 – May 2019 Lexapro down from 0,6 to 0,3mg then Prozac to 0,6 mg switch because severe discontinuation effects (may also have been from Wellbutrin..)    

Wellbutrin down from 37,5mg to 35,3mg 

October 2019        Seroquel 12,5 mg for 4 weeks because of extreme sleeping problems, then weaning off in 2 weeks       Prozac up dosage to 1,2 mg

March 2020     Wellbutrin in 2 steps down from 35,3mg to 33,3mg   Extreme withdrawal affects during 8 months. Stopped tapering Wellbutrin  until total off Prozac. February 2020 – November 2020   Prozac down in steps from 1,2mg to 0,57mg. 

Jan 2021 Prozac down to:  0,55> 0,53>0,51mg,   Feb 0,47mg ,  Mar 0,42mg,   Apr 0,37, longer hold because of WD symptoms July 0,36 and hold again

 

Supplements: Fish Oil (3000mg), Magnesium 100 mg, 2 drops of Lavender Oil when feeling anxiety. 50mg of L-Theanine when severe discontinuation effects caused by Wellbutrin

 

Please note this is NOT a medical advice. Discuss all your medical issues with a doctor who understands psychical drugs and really knows how to withdraw from them. I wish that you will find one.

Link to post
Needofwisdom
1 hour ago, Go2zero said:

 

These are common WD symptoms. I periods of healing insomnia often is a sign that we are still in the process of healing and stabilization.

 

How do you feel compared to 17 days ago (before reinstatement)? Please check your posts and (video) journals to be sure of the differences.

 

 

Thank you Go2zero I just feel like its so strange to be wide awake after only 2 hours of sleep then trying to fall back asleep again for another 2 hours and again for another 2 hours. Its one of the things thats been happening as soon as I started reinstating at .5mg. When i had the early withdrawal insomnia symptoms 5 months ago i remember it was almost impossible to fall asleep I would just sit in bed or pace around for hours and hours unable to fall asleep just feeling rage, insomnia and headaches. 

 

As for how I feel since reinstating 17 days ago it has been a bumpy ride especially during the first few days of reinstatement. I would still have these deep dark s thoughts/urges and crashes along with my reality perception becoming very dark gloomy/dissociated/depersonalizedderealized before beginning reinstatement those were probably my worst symptoms. But day in and day out days have been better than the previous days about 4 to 5 days in i felt much more stable and then it was windows and waves during certain times of the day gradually noticed i was feeling ok a lot of the times then i will get with a wave but i learned to really really appreciate the relief times of feeling ok.  Overall the improvement has been definitely clear it has been a night and day difference compared to 17 days ago and I am sticking with it. I will just keep trying to push myself towards progress.

 

What worries me is when I will be able to know when the right time to wean off is and if I should wean off when i feel that depression like WD will still be there or wait until i feel like myself again fully with very few waves, I hope it is just WD. I feel like the pills are muting whats lying underneath and pulling the rug would unveil all the dark scary stuff below. I wonder what other withdrawal symptoms i would face even coming off a small dose like .5mg which i know is not a therapeutic dose for depression yet its still relieving a lot of symptoms quite rapidly so it very well maybe WD, it does make perfect sense although very hard to differentiate when one is in the thick of things. 

 

1 hour ago, Go2zero said:

 

This also sounds like WD symptoms. It is often very hard to tell whether symptoms come from withdrawal or relapse... Doctors most often will say it is relapse. Lots of people in WD find out later it was WD (after getting more windows). Symptoms of relapse and withdrawal can be quite similar. But when more windows are coming this is a very good sign. Ans most often a sign it is WD.

 

 

 

Thank you so much for your help Go2zero. I will often see a lot of windows during much of the day then a wave will hit me at some point and will try to bring me down I would expect a depressed state to be more linear in mood with less ups and downs. These symptoms can be so tricky with their periods of relief and struggle.

 

1 hour ago, Go2zero said:

 

Don't expect wonders like healing and totally stabilizing  in a few weeks. One will slowly get better. 2 steps forward, 1 backwards, and so on.

 

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/23081-are-we-there-yet-how-long-is-withdrawal-going-to-take/?tab=comments#comment-492493

 

 

 

This is very good and important!  Do things you like or used to like (even when you do not like them now because of WD)

 

Yes thank you for all your encouragement and communication it has been such a relief to communicate with you because you understand what this is like when very few around me do.  Im trying to get myself back in physical activities i enjoyed before things like hiking,biking,exercising,swimming,lifting weights and want to try out other things as well. I know this is going to be a battle and no matter what i learned that this is a lifestyle even when i do successfully wean off (God willing) i will still have to continue to make the positive changes day in and day out in order to get better.

 

Thank you so much for all the knowledge, encouragement,experience and much needed help you have given me.

Zoloft Jan 2005 - July 2005 weaned off

Zoloft June 2008 - Jan 2009 weaned off

Escitalopram Jan 2019 - Nov 2020 weaned off

Escitalopram April 2021 6 days 10 and 20mg ct stopped

Escitalopram July 20th 2021 to July 30th reinstated 2.5mg discontinued ct after feeling no benefit worsening

Escitalopram August 21st 2021 .5mg reinstatement

Klonopin as needed 

Ativan as needed

Link to post
  • Moderator
3 hours ago, Needofwisdom said:

As for how I feel since reinstating 17 days ago it has been a bumpy ride especially during the first few days of reinstatement. I would still have these deep dark s thoughts/urges and crashes along with my reality perception becoming very dark gloomy/dissociated/depersonalizedderealized before beginning reinstatement those were probably my worst symptoms. But day in and day out days have been better than the previous days about 4 to 5 days in i felt much more stable and then it was windows and waves during certain times of the day gradually noticed i was feeling ok a lot of the times then i will get with a wave but i learned to really really appreciate the relief times of feeling ok.  Overall the improvement has been definitely clear it has been a night and day difference compared to 17 days ago and I am sticking with it. I will just keep trying to push myself towards progress.

 

 

I find this very positive! It is so normal during WD that we experience what you write. Also the fact that you sleep for 2 hours and then suddenly awake and not being able to sleep is quite common. Probably this will improve slowly. After some week or months you will probably notice that you will sleep for 3 hours and later 4 hours. These processes take time. Pleas keep everything stable with meds. The less you change the faster the healing will go.

 

 

3 hours ago, Needofwisdom said:

What worries me is when I will be able to know when the right time to wean off is and if I should wean off when i feel that depression like WD will still be there or wait until i feel like myself again fully with very few waves, I hope it is just WD. I feel like the pills are muting whats lying underneath and pulling the rug would unveil all the dark scary stuff below. I wonder what other withdrawal symptoms i would face even coming off a small dose like .5mg which i know is not a therapeutic dose for depression yet its still relieving a lot of symptoms quite rapidly so it very well maybe WD, it does make perfect sense although very hard to differentiate when one is in the thick of things. 

 

 

Try to stick where you are NOW in the process. Worrying does not bring anything. Worrying is fear for what MAY happen in future. But you live NOW. And we cannot know what the future brings. You are not alone. You have support here and try to find support elsewhere too. That is also good for your self confidence. You are doing very good. So stay in the moment. In that way you will also do the right things when the future is here.

1993    Anafranil (Clomipramine) for a few months. Later in 1993 Paxil for a few months 1993- 2006      No medication

2006   Effexor, Cymbalta, some Benzo’s. All for short periods. Later in 2006 Lexapro (escitalopram) 10 mg and shortly after Wellbutrin XR 150mg, against side effects Lexapro 

Since 2006 until end of 2015: Several times on and off Lexapro and Wellbutrin and several slight dosage changes. Mostly taken dosages: 5mg Lexapro and 150mg Wellbutrin

2016  Dosage change Lexapro from 5mg to 2,5 mg. Wellbutrin stayed om 150mg

November 2016 – April 2017 Down from 2,5mg to 0,6mg Lexapro (in steps) without much problems. Wellbutrin down from 150mg to 66mg. Also without much problems.

April 2017 – March 2019       Lexapro 0,6 mg        April 2017 - August 2018       Wellbutrin in small steps down from 66mg in to 37,5 mg . Quite heavy WD after each step.

March 2019 – May 2019 Lexapro down from 0,6 to 0,3mg then Prozac to 0,6 mg switch because severe discontinuation effects (may also have been from Wellbutrin..)    

Wellbutrin down from 37,5mg to 35,3mg 

October 2019        Seroquel 12,5 mg for 4 weeks because of extreme sleeping problems, then weaning off in 2 weeks       Prozac up dosage to 1,2 mg

March 2020     Wellbutrin in 2 steps down from 35,3mg to 33,3mg   Extreme withdrawal affects during 8 months. Stopped tapering Wellbutrin  until total off Prozac. February 2020 – November 2020   Prozac down in steps from 1,2mg to 0,57mg. 

Jan 2021 Prozac down to:  0,55> 0,53>0,51mg,   Feb 0,47mg ,  Mar 0,42mg,   Apr 0,37, longer hold because of WD symptoms July 0,36 and hold again

 

Supplements: Fish Oil (3000mg), Magnesium 100 mg, 2 drops of Lavender Oil when feeling anxiety. 50mg of L-Theanine when severe discontinuation effects caused by Wellbutrin

 

Please note this is NOT a medical advice. Discuss all your medical issues with a doctor who understands psychical drugs and really knows how to withdraw from them. I wish that you will find one.

Link to post
Needofwisdom
3 hours ago, Go2zero said:

 

I find this very positive! It is so normal during WD that we experience what you write. Also the fact that you sleep for 2 hours and then suddenly awake and not being able to sleep is quite common. Probably this will improve slowly. After some week or months you will probably notice that you will sleep for 3 hours and later 4 hours. These processes take time. Pleas keep everything stable with meds. The less you change the faster the healing will go.

Thank you Go2zero I will keep this doseage and maintain my daily routines as best as I can. It has been steadily working and I will not change it. 

 

3 hours ago, Go2zero said:

 

Try to stick where you are NOW in the process. Worrying does not bring anything. Worrying is fear for what MAY happen in future. But you live NOW. And we cannot know what the future brings. You are not alone. You have support here and try to find support elsewhere too. That is also good for your self confidence. You are doing very good. So stay in the moment. In that way you will also do the right things when the future is here.

 

Thank you Go2zero I am trying to stay in the present i know that I should do that and sometimes i lose track and think too far ahead or begin to dwell on the past. You are absolutely right the now is more important and I am so glad that I have support and such great great help on this forum from such good people like you and others. I am not alone and others understand what this withdrawal process feels like. I am very grateful to have people that i can communicate with while going through all of this.

Zoloft Jan 2005 - July 2005 weaned off

Zoloft June 2008 - Jan 2009 weaned off

Escitalopram Jan 2019 - Nov 2020 weaned off

Escitalopram April 2021 6 days 10 and 20mg ct stopped

Escitalopram July 20th 2021 to July 30th reinstated 2.5mg discontinued ct after feeling no benefit worsening

Escitalopram August 21st 2021 .5mg reinstatement

Klonopin as needed 

Ativan as needed

Link to post
Needofwisdom

Update today Sept 9 2021, the last few days have been rough, life had kicked my butt. Rocky friendship triggered my symptoms to worsen a couple of days ago. Had to go through a stressful couple of days. It was a rough ride to say the least due to circumstances which popped up out of nowhere. I am now better from thar and on track i havent missed a dose but what I am noticing is the .5mg is now working against me in a way, i switched to taking it in the morning to see if it would help me stay asleep at night instead of waking up every 2 hours but it hasn't worked. What I notice is that when i take it in the morning it dulls/numbs me to the the point i can hardly feel anything for most of the day and i dont feel my emotions whether good or bad just a flat zombie like dissociated effect. Today I am extending my dosage to be taken later in the afternoon and then eventually in the evening.  It seems that the longer i am off it during the daytime the more i feel better. I am going to try to take it closer to the evenings to see if it suits me better. I want to spend most of the day without meds so that i can still feel some what like a human rather than a complete zombie.

 

I think the sleep issue has been hindering my progress the most. I feel so exhausted from all the waking up and all the nightmares. Its been almost 3 weeks now of the same pattern of 2 hour sleep cycles with nightmares occuring almost every night. I think the big mistake i had made was reinstating earlier in July with 2.5mg and after that reinstatement my withdrawals had gotten worst which led me to reinstate at .5mg which pulled me out of that worsened withdrawal and now I am more stable emotionally but at the same time the meds are flattening everything to a zombie level. I want to see what will suit me best at this point because the time i feel best during the day now is before taking the meds when earlier in the reinstaement the time i felt best was shortly after taking the doseage. Its almost like they are becoming more powerful at zombying all my emotions and not only alleviating the withdrawal symptoms. 

 

 

Zoloft Jan 2005 - July 2005 weaned off

Zoloft June 2008 - Jan 2009 weaned off

Escitalopram Jan 2019 - Nov 2020 weaned off

Escitalopram April 2021 6 days 10 and 20mg ct stopped

Escitalopram July 20th 2021 to July 30th reinstated 2.5mg discontinued ct after feeling no benefit worsening

Escitalopram August 21st 2021 .5mg reinstatement

Klonopin as needed 

Ativan as needed

Link to post
  • Moderator

Stressful situations definitely can make symptoms worse. 

Good idea to take meds in evening and see if that helps.

 

If no improvement, you might a bit less escitalopram. Although 0,5mg is not high, a too high reinstatement can cause the symptoms you describe. Especially when one has stopped meds before, or made big dose changes or CT'd.

 

I would say, see first what it brings taking the med at night. If that does not help, you could try a dose of 0,45mg (so 10% less)

 

1993    Anafranil (Clomipramine) for a few months. Later in 1993 Paxil for a few months 1993- 2006      No medication

2006   Effexor, Cymbalta, some Benzo’s. All for short periods. Later in 2006 Lexapro (escitalopram) 10 mg and shortly after Wellbutrin XR 150mg, against side effects Lexapro 

Since 2006 until end of 2015: Several times on and off Lexapro and Wellbutrin and several slight dosage changes. Mostly taken dosages: 5mg Lexapro and 150mg Wellbutrin

2016  Dosage change Lexapro from 5mg to 2,5 mg. Wellbutrin stayed om 150mg

November 2016 – April 2017 Down from 2,5mg to 0,6mg Lexapro (in steps) without much problems. Wellbutrin down from 150mg to 66mg. Also without much problems.

April 2017 – March 2019       Lexapro 0,6 mg        April 2017 - August 2018       Wellbutrin in small steps down from 66mg in to 37,5 mg . Quite heavy WD after each step.

March 2019 – May 2019 Lexapro down from 0,6 to 0,3mg then Prozac to 0,6 mg switch because severe discontinuation effects (may also have been from Wellbutrin..)    

Wellbutrin down from 37,5mg to 35,3mg 

October 2019        Seroquel 12,5 mg for 4 weeks because of extreme sleeping problems, then weaning off in 2 weeks       Prozac up dosage to 1,2 mg

March 2020     Wellbutrin in 2 steps down from 35,3mg to 33,3mg   Extreme withdrawal affects during 8 months. Stopped tapering Wellbutrin  until total off Prozac. February 2020 – November 2020   Prozac down in steps from 1,2mg to 0,57mg. 

Jan 2021 Prozac down to:  0,55> 0,53>0,51mg,   Feb 0,47mg ,  Mar 0,42mg,   Apr 0,37, longer hold because of WD symptoms July 0,36 and hold again

 

Supplements: Fish Oil (3000mg), Magnesium 100 mg, 2 drops of Lavender Oil when feeling anxiety. 50mg of L-Theanine when severe discontinuation effects caused by Wellbutrin

 

Please note this is NOT a medical advice. Discuss all your medical issues with a doctor who understands psychical drugs and really knows how to withdraw from them. I wish that you will find one.

Link to post
Needofwisdom
On 9/10/2021 at 3:06 AM, Go2zero said:

Stressful situations definitely can make symptoms worse. 

Good idea to take meds in evening and see if that helps.

 

If no improvement, you might a bit less escitalopram. Although 0,5mg is not high, a too high reinstatement can cause the symptoms you describe. Especially when one has stopped meds before, or made big dose changes or CT'd.

 

I would say, see first what it brings taking the med at night. If that does not help, you could try a dose of 0,45mg (so 10% less)

 

 

Hello Go2zero as always thank you very much for your reply. Its been really difficult much of the time. I have switched to taking it later in the afternoon 5pm. It has been a couple days now, the first night i woke up with more body anxiety and felt more of the waves during the day, i think this is because of the dose change time. The second night i didnt wake with body anxiety and had a little bit of more sleep. During the day its a struggle I feel very numbed out much of the time and have very little interest in doing anything its like being a  zombie.

 

While I dont experience much of the crashes i would feel before i started i also dont feel any motivation to do anything which is like where I was shortly before I reinstated except now im just more flat emotionally and mentally. Basically i am bedridden for most of the day going out of the house is a challenge on its own. The fatigue is strong very little energy to move and I feel disconnected from myself and emotions/thoughts like im on autopilot. Its like im taking this small amount of medication just to feel depressed all day. It feels like the depression i had before I started ever taking escitalopram after my pup passed away except stronger and with other symptoms like detachment from myself with strong brain fog.

 

I have aquired the liquid form of escitalopram 5mg/5ml. I want to make sure i dose correctly if or when i transition to the liquid. This may be a stupid question but .5ml is a .5mg dose with the 5mg/5ml liquid escitalopram? Im just very cautious now and terrified to dose incorrectly. Its basically been 3 weeks now i feel like i have no personality but still dont want to go back to feeling the immense crashes/s thoughts urges before i reinstated because that was  much worst. 

 

I dont know what it will mean to be stable at such a low dose because i definitely still feel like im in a depressed state. Just feel like a dull person like my thoughts are muted and i feel zombied out. The lack of sleep and the nightmares night after night have really taken a toll on me physically and mentally. I feel like just one night of decent sleep could make such a huge difference. I am taking 100mg magnesium citrate and 1 mg melatonin before i go to sleep and still wake up 2 hours later cant get a decent nights sleep. All in all I am trying day after day to get better if it means being zombied out to buy me some more time then i guess i will do what i have to do i just hope i can see some improvement later on because this escitalopram really makes life dull.

 

Sorry for the long rant/post i just have a lot i have been struggling with day to day. Many days I just feel like I have hit a wall that is hard to get past. 

Zoloft Jan 2005 - July 2005 weaned off

Zoloft June 2008 - Jan 2009 weaned off

Escitalopram Jan 2019 - Nov 2020 weaned off

Escitalopram April 2021 6 days 10 and 20mg ct stopped

Escitalopram July 20th 2021 to July 30th reinstated 2.5mg discontinued ct after feeling no benefit worsening

Escitalopram August 21st 2021 .5mg reinstatement

Klonopin as needed 

Ativan as needed

Link to post
  • Moderator

So Sorry to read how you are feeling.

 

4 hours ago, Needofwisdom said:

It feels like the depression i had before I started ever taking escitalopram after my pup passed away except stronger and with other symptoms like detachment from myself with strong brain fog.

 

This sounds like typical WD symptoms. We have to deal with that. Time will do the healing.

 

In a way I get the impression that you are doing better than when you came here for the first time. But I also understand that you suffer from WD.

 

How do you see that. Do you see improvements since you reinstated?

I understand that the insomnia came back after reinstating. What do you think yourself about changing the reinstatement dose? Up or down a bit? Altostrata suggested earlier to go to 1 mg for a couple of days and see what that does. But I also seem to understand that your insomnia got worse every time you reinstated at a higher dose.

 

You should know that insomnia as aw WD symptom can stay for months, even when at the right reinstatement dose. For example: I am now already 6 months at the same low dose, because I experience insomnia too. It is slowly getting better now.... Every month I sleep a bit longer now, but still not as before...

 

4 hours ago, Needofwisdom said:

I have aquired the liquid form of escitalopram 5mg/5ml. I want to make sure i dose correctly if or when i transition to the liquid. This may be a stupid question but .5ml is a .5mg dose with the 5mg/5ml liquid escitalopram? Im just very cautious now and terrified to dose incorrectly.

 

If the liquid give 5ml per 5 ml, your calculation is correct. You should take 0,5ml then to have 0,5mg.

 

It is best to make a cross over from own made liquid to factory made liquid. If you switch over in 1 time this may have trigger symptoms.

That would mean: 

4 days 75% own made liquid and 25% factory made (0,125ml)

4 days 50% own made liquid and 25% factory made (0,25ml)

4 days 25% own made liquid and 25% factory made (0,375ml)

100% factory made (0,5ml)

 

Keep the liquid refrigerated. And check the shelf life after opening the bottle.

 

4 hours ago, Needofwisdom said:

I dont know what it will mean to be stable at such a low dose because i definitely still feel like im in a depressed state. Just feel like a dull person like my thoughts are muted and i feel zombied out. The lack of sleep and the nightmares night after night have really taken a toll on me physically and mentally.

 

It is important to notice if you experience better moments (windows). If so, that is a sign of healing. But waves also come again during this healing process. Every improvement is a step towards healing. But is takes time. This can be months.

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/82-the-windows-and-waves-pattern-of-stabilization/

 

 

1993    Anafranil (Clomipramine) for a few months. Later in 1993 Paxil for a few months 1993- 2006      No medication

2006   Effexor, Cymbalta, some Benzo’s. All for short periods. Later in 2006 Lexapro (escitalopram) 10 mg and shortly after Wellbutrin XR 150mg, against side effects Lexapro 

Since 2006 until end of 2015: Several times on and off Lexapro and Wellbutrin and several slight dosage changes. Mostly taken dosages: 5mg Lexapro and 150mg Wellbutrin

2016  Dosage change Lexapro from 5mg to 2,5 mg. Wellbutrin stayed om 150mg

November 2016 – April 2017 Down from 2,5mg to 0,6mg Lexapro (in steps) without much problems. Wellbutrin down from 150mg to 66mg. Also without much problems.

April 2017 – March 2019       Lexapro 0,6 mg        April 2017 - August 2018       Wellbutrin in small steps down from 66mg in to 37,5 mg . Quite heavy WD after each step.

March 2019 – May 2019 Lexapro down from 0,6 to 0,3mg then Prozac to 0,6 mg switch because severe discontinuation effects (may also have been from Wellbutrin..)    

Wellbutrin down from 37,5mg to 35,3mg 

October 2019        Seroquel 12,5 mg for 4 weeks because of extreme sleeping problems, then weaning off in 2 weeks       Prozac up dosage to 1,2 mg

March 2020     Wellbutrin in 2 steps down from 35,3mg to 33,3mg   Extreme withdrawal affects during 8 months. Stopped tapering Wellbutrin  until total off Prozac. February 2020 – November 2020   Prozac down in steps from 1,2mg to 0,57mg. 

Jan 2021 Prozac down to:  0,55> 0,53>0,51mg,   Feb 0,47mg ,  Mar 0,42mg,   Apr 0,37, longer hold because of WD symptoms July 0,36 and hold again

 

Supplements: Fish Oil (3000mg), Magnesium 100 mg, 2 drops of Lavender Oil when feeling anxiety. 50mg of L-Theanine when severe discontinuation effects caused by Wellbutrin

 

Please note this is NOT a medical advice. Discuss all your medical issues with a doctor who understands psychical drugs and really knows how to withdraw from them. I wish that you will find one.

Link to post
Needofwisdom
3 hours ago, Go2zero said:

So Sorry to read how you are feeling.

 

 

This sounds like typical WD symptoms. We have to deal with that. Time will do the healing.

 

In a way I get the impression that you are doing better than when you came here for the first time. But I also understand that you suffer from WD.

 

How do you see that. Do you see improvements since you reinstated?

I understand that the insomnia came back after reinstating. What do you think yourself about changing the reinstatement dose? Up or down a bit? Altostrata suggested earlier to go to 1 mg for a couple of days and see what that does. But I also seem to understand that your insomnia got worse every time you reinstated at a higher dose.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thank you Go2zero I just feel like a lot of healing occurs during restful sleep and without it healing is being hindered. For instance last night i could only ger to sleep at 3am my anxiett was high,my frustrations were high and i just didnt feel that usual sedation i would get around the same time at night. So today i only had 3 hours of sleep with 1 hour cycles in between i woke up feeling burning in my nerves, body was shaking and head was burning. Even right now as Im laying in bed 2 hours after waking i feel the after effects of going to bed so late. 

 

Before i reinstated my sleep had corrected itself i was getting about 6 to 8 hours a night all the way through. Now after reinstating instead of all the intense daily intrusive thoughts, ocd, crazy swings of emotions and nervous crashes, Its more tolerable like the volume knob has been turned down but at the expense of any restful sleep. Almost like its all being repressed into my sleep cycle with the nightmares and frequent waking.

 

When i reinstated at 10 and 20mg i was actually fine sleeping wise i just had typical side effects dizziness anxiety etc then after i was told to come off cold turkey after about 6 or 8 days(dont remember) thats when all the withdrawals started about a day or 2 later. At 2.5 reinstatement July 20th from my video log i was able to sleep as well but the daily symptoms were getting worst ocd,anxiety,irritability, blurry vision, dizzy spells.

 

Then with the latest reinstatement of .5mg i had an a very quick relief of all the worstened symptoms i was facing extreme s ideation, horrible anxiety, inability to move very much, feeling extremely weird like everything perceived was very dysphoric, derealized,depersonalized. So those symptoms were much much worst. I think all of the reinstatements and lack of stability is really what did me most harm. Its like finding tge right balance is very difficult and the body keeps getting confused. Its trying to deal with the loss of the drug cold turkey then a reinstatement then another abrupt stop and then another reinstatement.

 

As for updosing or going down im not really sure what the best option is at this point. I mostly feel that after i take my dose its either a hit or miss in the first week and a half to 2 weeks i could definitely feel the benefits of the doseage after that it started to feel more and more mind numbing and i felt better before i started taking a dose. With that said i am really not trying to risk going up too much or going down too much.

 

 

 

Zoloft Jan 2005 - July 2005 weaned off

Zoloft June 2008 - Jan 2009 weaned off

Escitalopram Jan 2019 - Nov 2020 weaned off

Escitalopram April 2021 6 days 10 and 20mg ct stopped

Escitalopram July 20th 2021 to July 30th reinstated 2.5mg discontinued ct after feeling no benefit worsening

Escitalopram August 21st 2021 .5mg reinstatement

Klonopin as needed 

Ativan as needed

Link to post
Needofwisdom
4 hours ago, Go2zero said:

 

If the liquid give 5ml per 5 ml, your calculation is correct. You should take 0,5ml then to have 0,5mg.

 

It is best to make a cross over from own made liquid to factory made liquid. If you switch over in 1 time this may have trigger symptoms.

That would mean: 

4 days 75% own made liquid and 25% factory made (0,125ml)

4 days 50% own made liquid and 25% factory made (0,25ml)

4 days 25% own made liquid and 25% factory made (0,375ml)

100% factory made (0,5ml)

 

Keep the liquid refrigerated. And check the shelf life after opening the bottle.

 

Thank you Go2zero you have helped me so much more than I could have ever imagined. If I were to transition from own made liquid to factory made liquid then I would have to transition from pill form to own made liquid first from what i understand you teaching me earlier.

 

4 hours ago, Go2zero said:

 

It is important to notice if you experience better moments (windows). If so, that is a sign of healing. But waves also come again during this healing process. Every improvement is a step towards healing. But is takes time. This can be months.

 

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/82-the-windows-and-waves-pattern-of-stabilization/

 

 

 

Thank you Go2zero I do recognize when i do get windows and appreciate them for the time that they do last. I also feel that since reinstating and having this terrible insomnia again the windows are becoming shorter and the healing process is becoming more delayed. Its like a domino effect one symptom will trigger the other symptoms and it just makes things that much more difficult.  This drug makes me feel so dumb and lazy and not myself. Its such a nightmare  to deal with this day in and day out. My overall goal is to get off of it the best way I can as I really dont like being on it even at a low dose. I really dont understand why I went back on it back in april its like pure evil. I remember weaning off of it in november 2020 and being so happy to be off of it then by february,march feeling a slight depression and some insomnia crept up and I stupidly decided to take it again. Now it feels like im stuck on it unless i can possibly taper to a longer half life AD like fluoxetine which is a big risk in itself.

Zoloft Jan 2005 - July 2005 weaned off

Zoloft June 2008 - Jan 2009 weaned off

Escitalopram Jan 2019 - Nov 2020 weaned off

Escitalopram April 2021 6 days 10 and 20mg ct stopped

Escitalopram July 20th 2021 to July 30th reinstated 2.5mg discontinued ct after feeling no benefit worsening

Escitalopram August 21st 2021 .5mg reinstatement

Klonopin as needed 

Ativan as needed

Link to post
  • Moderator
1 hour ago, Needofwisdom said:

Thank you Go2zero you have helped me so much more than I could have ever imagined. If I were to transition from own made liquid to factory made liquid then I would have to transition from pill form to own made liquid first from what i understand you teaching me earlier.

 

I thought you were making your own liquid... If not you should make a crossover from dry pill form to liquid in the same way. One should never switch to liquid in 1 time. However making such small dosages in dry from is more difficult than doing it with own made liquid. Exact weighing in dry form is nearly impossible with such tiny dosages. 

 

If you stick with dry form, you can weigh 1 mg active ingredient which will probably around 10mg pill weight. And divide it in smaller parts by eyeballing. However I prefer making own liquid as I explained before.

1 hour ago, Needofwisdom said:

I really dont understand why I went back on it back in april its like pure evil. I remember weaning off of it in november 2020 and being so happy to be off of it then by february,march feeling a slight depression and some insomnia crept up and I stupidly decided to take it again.

 

Don't be so hard on yourself. It is also possible that the effects you felt in April were withdrawal symptoms starting after stopping in november. Not sure, but we see it quit often happen, that WD starts 2-4 months after stopping after CT or a too fast tapers or jumping tp zero at a too high dosage... And for example, 0,2 mg is already too much to jump to zero. Most people just don't know... Me neither when I stopped a few times....

 

A Prozac bridge is not the solution for most of us....  (I speak from experience...)

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/19373-the-prozac-switch-or-bridging-with-fluoxetine/

 

 

 

1993    Anafranil (Clomipramine) for a few months. Later in 1993 Paxil for a few months 1993- 2006      No medication

2006   Effexor, Cymbalta, some Benzo’s. All for short periods. Later in 2006 Lexapro (escitalopram) 10 mg and shortly after Wellbutrin XR 150mg, against side effects Lexapro 

Since 2006 until end of 2015: Several times on and off Lexapro and Wellbutrin and several slight dosage changes. Mostly taken dosages: 5mg Lexapro and 150mg Wellbutrin

2016  Dosage change Lexapro from 5mg to 2,5 mg. Wellbutrin stayed om 150mg

November 2016 – April 2017 Down from 2,5mg to 0,6mg Lexapro (in steps) without much problems. Wellbutrin down from 150mg to 66mg. Also without much problems.

April 2017 – March 2019       Lexapro 0,6 mg        April 2017 - August 2018       Wellbutrin in small steps down from 66mg in to 37,5 mg . Quite heavy WD after each step.

March 2019 – May 2019 Lexapro down from 0,6 to 0,3mg then Prozac to 0,6 mg switch because severe discontinuation effects (may also have been from Wellbutrin..)    

Wellbutrin down from 37,5mg to 35,3mg 

October 2019        Seroquel 12,5 mg for 4 weeks because of extreme sleeping problems, then weaning off in 2 weeks       Prozac up dosage to 1,2 mg

March 2020     Wellbutrin in 2 steps down from 35,3mg to 33,3mg   Extreme withdrawal affects during 8 months. Stopped tapering Wellbutrin  until total off Prozac. February 2020 – November 2020   Prozac down in steps from 1,2mg to 0,57mg. 

Jan 2021 Prozac down to:  0,55> 0,53>0,51mg,   Feb 0,47mg ,  Mar 0,42mg,   Apr 0,37, longer hold because of WD symptoms July 0,36 and hold again

 

Supplements: Fish Oil (3000mg), Magnesium 100 mg, 2 drops of Lavender Oil when feeling anxiety. 50mg of L-Theanine when severe discontinuation effects caused by Wellbutrin

 

Please note this is NOT a medical advice. Discuss all your medical issues with a doctor who understands psychical drugs and really knows how to withdraw from them. I wish that you will find one.

Link to post
  • Moderator
2 hours ago, Needofwisdom said:

When i reinstated at 10 and 20mg i was actually fine sleeping wise i just had typical side effects dizziness anxiety etc then after i was told to come off cold turkey after about 6 or 8 days(dont remember) thats when all the withdrawals started about a day or 2 later. At 2.5 reinstatement July 20th from my video log i was able to sleep as well but the daily symptoms were getting worst ocd,anxiety,irritability, blurry vision, dizzy spells.

It is hard to say how things work out. Every time we reinstate the effects can be totally different from last time....

 

Therefor I find it hard to advice you whether to go up or down in dosage. You made a very good progress in most symptoms but the insomnia came back after reinstatement. It would be try and error. I will discuss it with other moderators and come back to you.

 

1993    Anafranil (Clomipramine) for a few months. Later in 1993 Paxil for a few months 1993- 2006      No medication

2006   Effexor, Cymbalta, some Benzo’s. All for short periods. Later in 2006 Lexapro (escitalopram) 10 mg and shortly after Wellbutrin XR 150mg, against side effects Lexapro 

Since 2006 until end of 2015: Several times on and off Lexapro and Wellbutrin and several slight dosage changes. Mostly taken dosages: 5mg Lexapro and 150mg Wellbutrin

2016  Dosage change Lexapro from 5mg to 2,5 mg. Wellbutrin stayed om 150mg

November 2016 – April 2017 Down from 2,5mg to 0,6mg Lexapro (in steps) without much problems. Wellbutrin down from 150mg to 66mg. Also without much problems.

April 2017 – March 2019       Lexapro 0,6 mg        April 2017 - August 2018       Wellbutrin in small steps down from 66mg in to 37,5 mg . Quite heavy WD after each step.

March 2019 – May 2019 Lexapro down from 0,6 to 0,3mg then Prozac to 0,6 mg switch because severe discontinuation effects (may also have been from Wellbutrin..)    

Wellbutrin down from 37,5mg to 35,3mg 

October 2019        Seroquel 12,5 mg for 4 weeks because of extreme sleeping problems, then weaning off in 2 weeks       Prozac up dosage to 1,2 mg

March 2020     Wellbutrin in 2 steps down from 35,3mg to 33,3mg   Extreme withdrawal affects during 8 months. Stopped tapering Wellbutrin  until total off Prozac. February 2020 – November 2020   Prozac down in steps from 1,2mg to 0,57mg. 

Jan 2021 Prozac down to:  0,55> 0,53>0,51mg,   Feb 0,47mg ,  Mar 0,42mg,   Apr 0,37, longer hold because of WD symptoms July 0,36 and hold again

 

Supplements: Fish Oil (3000mg), Magnesium 100 mg, 2 drops of Lavender Oil when feeling anxiety. 50mg of L-Theanine when severe discontinuation effects caused by Wellbutrin

 

Please note this is NOT a medical advice. Discuss all your medical issues with a doctor who understands psychical drugs and really knows how to withdraw from them. I wish that you will find one.

Link to post
  • Administrator
Altostrata
On 9/2/2021 at 5:47 PM, Needofwisdom said:

Currently I am on the pill form weighing out doses of 7mg or roughly .5mg of the escitalopram but as time goes on its becoming harder to accurately measure out these doseages. Sometimes i see what i measured out as .007g previously then turns into a different number later like .008 or .009 a day later. I am calibrating before each measurement and triple checking.

 

Dry-cutting is highly error prone, that is why we favor using the liquid form. Is there some reason you cannot get the prescription liquid for escitalopram?

 

What times o'clock do you take your drugs, with their dosages?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

Link to post
Needofwisdom
6 hours ago, Go2zero said:

I thought you were making your own liquid... If not you should make a crossover from dry pill form to liquid in the same way. One should never switch to liquid in 1 time. However making such small dosages in dry from is more difficult than doing it with own made liquid. Exact weighing in dry form is nearly impossible with such tiny dosages. 

 

If you stick with dry form, you can weigh 1 mg active ingredient which will probably around 10mg pill weight. And divide it in smaller parts by eyeballing. However I prefer making own liquid as I explained before.

 

 

Thank you Go2zero I made my own liquid form but have yet to try it out because im afraid to make the leap just yet and i have escitalopram 5mg/5ml if my own liquid doesnt work out. I have been sticking to dry form for the time being but plan on moving to liquid because the accuracy of weighing out such a small amount has been difficult to confirm.

 

6 hours ago, Go2zero said:

 

 

Don't be so hard on yourself. It is also possible that the effects you felt in April were withdrawal symptoms starting after stopping in november. Not sure, but we see it quit often happen, that WD starts 2-4 months after stopping after CT or a too fast tapers or jumping tp zero at a too high dosage... And for example, 0,2 mg is already too much to jump to zero. Most people just don't know... Me neither when I stopped a few times....

 

A Prozac bridge is not the solution for most of us....  (I speak from experience...)

 

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/19373-the-prozac-switch-or-bridging-with-fluoxetine/

 

 

 

 

I dont know what I did when I reinstated and then cold turkeyed in april all I remember is that after I weaned off in November I did not have any withdrawals and actually felt ok for months then i slowly started to notice i was getting more irritable 2 or 3 months later, my sleep had become worst and i would feel dizzy from time to time. I thought it was my post concussion syndrome coming back then in april i reinstated for 6 to 8 days (cant recall) and after i dropped i immediately within a day felt like i had a strong flu my body was aching and i was bed ridden sleeping for 15 to 16 hours then i awoke got out of bed felt alright for a day or 2 noticed i was more irritable for  week and then all broke loose crazy headaches,major insomnia rage,mood swings,all while i was in college taking 7 classes i was so dissociated and raging could not sleep at all i would take an ativan half a pill and then another and still wouldnt be able to get sleep. Then 3 days later i went to the dentist to remove a wisdom tooth because my mother believed it was all from a tooth infection which i did not believe whatsoever. I went ti the dentist had my wisdom tooth removed and was given amoxicillin for a prescription this was about 3 days after the major withdrawal symptoms appeared.I knew it wasnt a tooth infection and by that time knew it wasnt post concussion syndrome. I took about 3 of the amoxicillin pills then stopped because i was taking probiotics at the time and didnt want them to interfere.  I researched and found out about discontinuation syndrome which i had to basically teach what it was to my mother. These symptoms  happened after month month after month. About 1 and half month later in late may early june i was told by my mother that i should reinstate a 5 mg dose. By that time i was terrified of taking another pill and had very little trust for anything she had to say becsuse she wss the one who told me to cut cold turkey saying many of her patients quit cold turkey at 20 mg with no withdrawals. 

 

By that point she had realized she was wrong but i wouldnt take 5mg again because i was afraid. 

 

I was also told to take fluoxetine as a taper to withdraw from the lexapro i was told so many different things take ativan,take zoloft,take fluoxetine,take 5 mg of escitalopram. From my resrarch online i read that reinstating would risk kindling and taking another ad would create new side effects and yet another drug to withdraw from. So i couldnt trust anything. I had many crashes s breakdowns along the way just the worst unimaginable feelings i thought it would get better but it transitioned from one symptom to the next.

 

7 hours ago, Go2zero said:

It is hard to say how things work out. Every time we reinstate the effects can be totally different from last time....

 

Therefor I find it hard to advice you whether to go up or down in dosage. You made a very good progress in most symptoms but the insomnia came back after reinstatement. It would be try and error. I will discuss it with other moderators and come back to you.

 

 

Thank you Go2zero Im just so exhausted from the inability to sleep for longer than 2 hours its so strange i can fall asleep when the sleepiness comes slong but i wake up each and every night 2 hours later almost like i had a full nights sleep. But I know its just taking a toll on my body left and right. Right now my blood pressure has been going up and i feel like im not even here in my life.

6 hours ago, Altostrata said:

 

Dry-cutting is highly error prone, that is why we favor using the liquid form. Is there some reason you cannot get the prescription liquid for escitalopram?

 

What times o'clock do you take your drugs, with their dosages?

 

Hello Altostrata thank you for your reply. I have the 5mg 5ml liquid escitalopram on standby im just afraid to take it because i heard i could not have a good reaction to it and its different than pill form.  I take .007g or 7mg of a 136mg full weight 10mg active ingredient pill which is roughly .5mg active ingredient of escitalopram at 5pm. I have tried taking it at different times of the day but it has no effect on my insomnia or sleep disturbances.

Zoloft Jan 2005 - July 2005 weaned off

Zoloft June 2008 - Jan 2009 weaned off

Escitalopram Jan 2019 - Nov 2020 weaned off

Escitalopram April 2021 6 days 10 and 20mg ct stopped

Escitalopram July 20th 2021 to July 30th reinstated 2.5mg discontinued ct after feeling no benefit worsening

Escitalopram August 21st 2021 .5mg reinstatement

Klonopin as needed 

Ativan as needed

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  • Moderator
7 hours ago, Needofwisdom said:

Thank you Go2zero Im just so exhausted from the inability to sleep for longer than 2 hours its so strange i can fall asleep when the sleepiness comes slong but i wake up each and every night 2 hours later almost like i had a full nights sleep. But I know its just taking a toll on my body left and right. Right now my blood pressure has been going up and i feel like im not even here in my life.

 

This is a very well known WD symptom. Lots of members experience the same. I also had it 3 times. It will get better, but it takes time... And yes, I know it can be exhausting. 

 

Here you can find info how to deal with it better:

 

 

 

1993    Anafranil (Clomipramine) for a few months. Later in 1993 Paxil for a few months 1993- 2006      No medication

2006   Effexor, Cymbalta, some Benzo’s. All for short periods. Later in 2006 Lexapro (escitalopram) 10 mg and shortly after Wellbutrin XR 150mg, against side effects Lexapro 

Since 2006 until end of 2015: Several times on and off Lexapro and Wellbutrin and several slight dosage changes. Mostly taken dosages: 5mg Lexapro and 150mg Wellbutrin

2016  Dosage change Lexapro from 5mg to 2,5 mg. Wellbutrin stayed om 150mg

November 2016 – April 2017 Down from 2,5mg to 0,6mg Lexapro (in steps) without much problems. Wellbutrin down from 150mg to 66mg. Also without much problems.

April 2017 – March 2019       Lexapro 0,6 mg        April 2017 - August 2018       Wellbutrin in small steps down from 66mg in to 37,5 mg . Quite heavy WD after each step.

March 2019 – May 2019 Lexapro down from 0,6 to 0,3mg then Prozac to 0,6 mg switch because severe discontinuation effects (may also have been from Wellbutrin..)    

Wellbutrin down from 37,5mg to 35,3mg 

October 2019        Seroquel 12,5 mg for 4 weeks because of extreme sleeping problems, then weaning off in 2 weeks       Prozac up dosage to 1,2 mg

March 2020     Wellbutrin in 2 steps down from 35,3mg to 33,3mg   Extreme withdrawal affects during 8 months. Stopped tapering Wellbutrin  until total off Prozac. February 2020 – November 2020   Prozac down in steps from 1,2mg to 0,57mg. 

Jan 2021 Prozac down to:  0,55> 0,53>0,51mg,   Feb 0,47mg ,  Mar 0,42mg,   Apr 0,37, longer hold because of WD symptoms July 0,36 and hold again

 

Supplements: Fish Oil (3000mg), Magnesium 100 mg, 2 drops of Lavender Oil when feeling anxiety. 50mg of L-Theanine when severe discontinuation effects caused by Wellbutrin

 

Please note this is NOT a medical advice. Discuss all your medical issues with a doctor who understands psychical drugs and really knows how to withdraw from them. I wish that you will find one.

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  • Administrator
Altostrata
23 hours ago, Altostrata said:

What times o'clock do you take your drugs, with their dosages?

 

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Needofwisdom
9 hours ago, Go2zero said:

 

This is a very well known WD symptom. Lots of members experience the same. I also had it 3 times. It will get better, but it takes time... And yes, I know it can be exhausting. 

 

Here you can find info how to deal with it better:

 

 

 

Thank you very much Go2zero that list of information is incredible.  I am wondering though why a reinstatement at this dose .5mg created the disturbed sleep but the reinstatement at 2.5mg had no effect on disrupting sleep. 2.5mg actually made me feel much more medicated zombied out at that point while having very little alleviation of symptoms just more strange feeling,ocd,moody etc . I feel like that 2.5mg reinstatement had made things worst overall especially a few weeks later after i stopped 2.5mg abruptly. I believe you mentioned that the starting and then stopping multiple times is what caused the disrupted sleep pattern to return from the earlier months of withdrawal. I now see how I made things worst for me by reinstating at 2.5mg because before I reinstated at that dose I was actually having an easier time dealing with my withdrawals. After I reinstated things just got much worst. Now im relying on this .5mg just to keep me where I am. 

 

 

50 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

 

 

Hello and thank you Altostrata for your question.  I have replied to your question in my previous post.  I take escitalopram .007g or roughly .5mg active ingredient at 4:30 to 5pm every day. 

 

17 hours ago, Needofwisdom said:

 

 

Hello Altostrata thank you for your reply. I have the 5mg 5ml liquid escitalopram on standby im just afraid to take it because i heard i could not have a good reaction to it and its different than pill form.  I take .007g or 7mg of a 136mg full weight 10mg active ingredient pill which is roughly .5mg active ingredient of escitalopram at 5pm. I have tried taking it at different times of the day but it has no effect on my insomnia or sleep disturbances.

 

Zoloft Jan 2005 - July 2005 weaned off

Zoloft June 2008 - Jan 2009 weaned off

Escitalopram Jan 2019 - Nov 2020 weaned off

Escitalopram April 2021 6 days 10 and 20mg ct stopped

Escitalopram July 20th 2021 to July 30th reinstated 2.5mg discontinued ct after feeling no benefit worsening

Escitalopram August 21st 2021 .5mg reinstatement

Klonopin as needed 

Ativan as needed

Link to post
  • Administrator
Altostrata

If I were you, I'd use the bottled escitalopram liquid and eliminate any potential area of error in your DIY method.

 

On 9/2/2021 at 12:44 PM, Needofwisdom said:

It seems to me that this doseage is now beginning to adjust itself and the mind numbing emotional blunting effect is starting to be a bit more pronounced with the way my nervous system is reacting to it. The rage / anger issues are really starting to remind me of when i was on it during the first run january 2020 to november 2020.

 

Were these adverse effects from your starting up escitalopram in January 2019 and increase to 5mg August 21, 2021? Did they go away or did you have them as long as you were taking escitalopram?

 

If I were you, I'd move your escitalopram dose earlier by one hour each day until you're taking it in the morning. Please let us know of any unusual symptoms that arise in this process.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Needofwisdom
50 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

 

Were these adverse effects from your starting up escitalopram in January 2019 and increase to 5mg August 21, 2021? Did they go away or did you have them as long as you were taking escitalopram?

 

 

 

When i had first started escitalopram it was around January 2020 the initial startup effects were just the usual anxiety feeling uneasiness for about 3 to 4 weeks. I was also given ativan at the time to deal with it but wouldnt really use it except if i could not sleep. Going up from 2.5 for 2 weeks then 5 for another 2 or 3 weeks and then eventually 10mg where I stayed until I started weaning off of them around October to November if I recall correctly. It seems like looking back now my memory of the time I was on them was like a blur. What I do know is that they made me a person I didnt really want to be. I was throughout much of the time on it much too cocky/confident its like . my ego was trying to keep inflating itself. I would also get rapid temper tantrums and road rage while on them. It was almost manic at times.

 

At some point after months of use I was realizing this stuff was making me too mad and fearless. I wanted to get off them so I did around November 2020. After I got off them for a short bit of time i felt a little slower less energy but then i started to feel better for a month or 2 then i felt a little more depressed irritable and anxious and my sleep cycle was getting shorter. I idiotically thought i would decide to take escitalopram again at full dose 10mg on around march 30th April 1st to 7th when i was told to cut it cold turkey due to what i look back on now as just typical side effects especially starting at 10mg. Since then its been hell everyday. 

 

I had withdrawal symptoms everyday and did not reinstate again at 2.5 mg until July 20th when I had experienced bad crashes for weeks before and finally just gave in. At 2.5mg crashes were under control but the drug was making me feel worst like my anxiety was worst, my ability to focus was worst, i felt like a strange zombie and I thought I would stick it out for a week but it never got better so i stopped again.

 

Then about a week or 2 after stopping that 2.5mg dose it was like everything before I reinstated at 2.5mg got even worst until i was completely housebound and unable to function with s thoughts and urges/attempts. On August 21st I very reluctantly reinstated again this time taking the tiniest chip off of a 10 mg pill and to my surprise it helped alleviate the worstened symptoms. Now I am taking roughly the .5mg which i weighed out to 7mg of a 136mg Escitalopram 10mg pill. I am depressed/fatigued/exhausted most of the day but the worstened symptoms from the other bad reinstatement are more under control and I am no longer having bad crying spells and major crashes throughout much of the day. Im basically miserable but not as miserable as I was before i started taking .5mg.

 

Ever since I reinstated the 2.5mg and then stopped I have also noticed my body arms legs were burning in the mornings.  Now at .5mg im still feeling that effect along with some trembling.

 

 

 

Zoloft Jan 2005 - July 2005 weaned off

Zoloft June 2008 - Jan 2009 weaned off

Escitalopram Jan 2019 - Nov 2020 weaned off

Escitalopram April 2021 6 days 10 and 20mg ct stopped

Escitalopram July 20th 2021 to July 30th reinstated 2.5mg discontinued ct after feeling no benefit worsening

Escitalopram August 21st 2021 .5mg reinstatement

Klonopin as needed 

Ativan as needed

Link to post
Needofwisdom
55 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

 

If I were you, I'd move your escitalopram dose earlier by one hour each day until you're taking it in the morning. Please let us know of any unusual symptoms that arise in this process.

 

I have before I would take it around 10am for a week or so and it made no difference in my sleep.

Zoloft Jan 2005 - July 2005 weaned off

Zoloft June 2008 - Jan 2009 weaned off

Escitalopram Jan 2019 - Nov 2020 weaned off

Escitalopram April 2021 6 days 10 and 20mg ct stopped

Escitalopram July 20th 2021 to July 30th reinstated 2.5mg discontinued ct after feeling no benefit worsening

Escitalopram August 21st 2021 .5mg reinstatement

Klonopin as needed 

Ativan as needed

Link to post

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