AldstadtGirl: Prozac withdrawal - severe muscle and joint pain especially at night

[arbor]

Dear @AldstadtGirl

It's good to hear from you.  It sounds as if you're suffering terribly right now.  I will defer medication and tapering advice to Alto and ChessieCat.  As far as the concern about where you want to live and how to survive there, I suggest asking your doctors for help from a Social Worker.  You may also be able to make contact with a Social Worker by contacting the local administrative departments.  Even a suicide prevention hotline may be able to guide you.  One of the challenges I keep noticing about w/d is that it warps time.  My brain often loses perspective that conditions pass.  Recently I've had to focus on finding some iota of calm in the moment, despite the maelstrom of panic.  Huddle in that tiny spot.  I have to say to myself over and over, I'm safe.  This I believe can help us calm further so that eventually we can make decisions.  We are with you, dear AldstadGirl.  You are not alone going through this hell.  I've had to accept that this terrible suffering lasts longer than I expected, and once again pull my thoughts back from SI.  From the Success Stories I hear that healing is worth hanging in there for.  

From reading your posts, I believe in your strength.  Keep us informed.

Arbor

 

[AldstadtGirl]

Thank you so much for replying, @JesusSavemefromWD. It sounds like you are still suffering a lot too...I can't quite get over your drug signature...

 

@Altostrata@arbor I need to add more more thing to anyone reading this: does anyone experience SEVERE mood and almost personality changes whilst on Prozac or any of these drugs? I never had this before my failed attempt at withdrawal, but now back on 20mg for 3 months, I can be almost 2 different people within a day. Every morning I wake up shaking, drenched in sweat and in utter despair at my situation (see last post). I'm tired, apathetic, anxious, feel like crap in every way, have pain etc. And then sometimes, probably after 3 or 4pm (this was when I had windows during WD), I suddenly shift into feeling quite "normal", more energetic, speak more quickly, perform better cognitively and suddenly think I'm perhaps able to start looking for a job and or moving. By midnight when the first cortisol/adrenaline rush usually hits (I go to bed by 10), the ''good'' mood is gone and I'm a wreck once again. I feel like I'm going mad. But I can't be, as I'm very aware of the shift and witnessing it clearly. Others have commented on it too. Perhaps it's even noticeable in the difference between this post and this morning's post. I'm still desperate to come off these drugs but I don't feel even 10% as anxious, panicked and hopeless as this morning. I KNOW this will not last, and I'm extremely confused as to what is real. I was wondering if anyone else experiences these devastating shift in mood/perspective/energy? Sometimes I wonder if the prozac has pooped out and I'm in some form of WD having messed up my CNS and still having a version of waves and windows. I find it very hard to eat most of the time and yet this evening have probably consumed 5000 cals (nuts, yogurt, cheese...I never usually eat dairy but am so panicked by my weight loss). It often happens in this evening state that I am able to eat a lot. I literally don't know what's going on with me. Sorry if this sounds crazy but I'm doing my best to describe what feels like a very bad nightmare recurring daily. Any input greatly appreciated. Thank you.

[JesusSavemefromWD]

I am indeed suffering a lot and i understand every single feeling you have had. But if you are getting windows of feeling normal that is a great sign of healing. I wish I had windows of feeling normal …. Well who knows maybe one day I will. 

[Altostrata]

Are you still taking 20mg fluoxetine? Please note we have been recommending you reduce your dosage since last month.

 

On 12/3/2021 at 11:32 AM, Altostrata said:

 

You waited too long to simply go off without tapering.

 

If you prefer the adverse effects, it's your decision. Please let us know when you'd like to taper a drug.

 

[AldstadtGirl]

@JesusSavemefromWD

I'm sure you will...keep going, you will heal. But I don't understand, I'm not in WD, I'm on 20mg of Prozac

I'm still forced to poison myself daily...I wish I was in a place to be able to taper. I'm really scared about where I'm at with these drugs...

[Altostrata]

9 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

Please note we have been recommending you reduce your dosage since last month.

 

Correction, we've been suggesting you're taking TOO MUCH Prozac since early November.

 

Your problem isn't withdrawal any more, you are experiencing adverse effects from TOO MUCH Prozac. Taking 20mg hasn't made you better.

 

It's been your decision to keep taking 20mg. Please let us know when you want to reduce it. 

[AldstadtGirl]

Thank you @arbor for your very kind reply. I'm so unstable, I'm paralyzed around making any decisions. But I can only keep going as you say. Thank you for being so supportive. Sending healing your way.

[AldstadtGirl]

Dear @Altostrata

Yes, I know, you are right. I have been too scared to taper again due to everything that's gone on and feeling so unstable. I told my psychiatrist today that I think the dose is too high and stimulating me too much, hence serious catabolic state and sever side effects. Of course he said not so, that 20mg is low dose etc etc. I have dispersible tablets but am concerned about accuracy in dosage (he said highly inaccurate). I asked him if he could get liquid formulation here but he said no. My concern is if I taper down to say 18mg, what if I trigger a crazy reaction and can function even less than now? He will likely not support me in this choice (keeps trying to push Remeron on me) and I am completely beholden to him for medical leave note. I'm going to ask him again if I can taper to 18mg with his support. Would you suggest shaving tablet with microscale over dissolving and using a syringe? I know I keep repeating this, but very scared to try again. Thank you for your response.

[JesusSavemefromWD]

25 minutes ago, AldstadtGirl said:

@JesusSavemefromWD

I'm sure you will...keep going, you will heal. But I don't understand, I'm not in WD, I'm on 20mg of Prozac

I'm still forced to poison myself daily...I wish I was in a place to be able to taper. I'm really scared about where I'm at with these drugs...

Thank you for the encouragement…. Common sense says I should heal, it was such a short exposure… but my ongoing symptoms make me doubt any normality. I know ur not in withdrawl but reinstating and stabilizing is as hard as withdrawal from what I read from other people here. You sound to me you are doing better then before reinstating…. Am I right? 

[AldstadtGirl]

@JesusSavemefromWD

It's hard to say...better in some ways, but have lost sense of soul connection that was really growing during rare WD windows. Now feel like inner compass is dead again. I felt I was coming back to life before October. I'm 'better' than I was during the horrific 8 week period it took for the prozac to 'stabilse' me. As @Altostratasays, I think I am on too much prozac too and had a serious adverse reaction reinstating. I should have listened to advice to come down earlier, but I was so suicidal and a compete wreck, not functioning at all. i thought "I need my life back', but it hasn't really worked. I'm still not ok but no, not as bad as October 10 to December 3. I sort of leveled out a bit in early December but now I have these crazy split days and at least a suicidal day a week in which I am seriously planning and preparing. these drugs are definitely killing me. My physical health is shot. I basically don't know what to do but would like to come down to 18mg. No idea how I will feel in the morning as I change my mind about stuff. I'm sharing this because I was NOT like this before. It is definitely linked to the reinstatement in some form. Sigh. I don't know. This is such a mind f****. Tonight I am so wired I feel I could take on the world, and I know that tomorrow morning I will once again be a shell of myself, shaking and struggling to think. May we all be delivered from this hell. I will keep praying for you and others.💕

[JesusSavemefromWD]

6 minutes ago, AldstadtGirl said:

@JesusSavemefromWD

It's hard to say...better in some ways, but have lost sense of soul connection that was really growing during rare WD windows. Now feel like inner compass is dead again. I felt I was coming back to life before October. I'm 'better' than I was during the horrific 8 week period it took for the prozac to 'stabilse' me. As @Altostratasays, I think I am on too much prozac too and had a serious adverse reaction reinstating. I should have listened to advice to come down earlier, but I was so suicidal and a compete wreck, not functioning at all. i thought "I need my life back', but it hasn't really worked. I'm still not ok but no, not as bad as October 10 to December 3. I sort of leveled out a bit in early December but now I have these crazy split days and at least a suicidal day a week in which I am seriously planning and preparing. these drugs are definitely killing me. My physical health is shot. I basically don't know what to do but would like to come down to 18mg. No idea how I will feel in the morning as I change my mind about stuff. I'm sharing this because I was NOT like this before. It is definitely linked to the reinstatement in some form. Sigh. I don't know. This is such a mind f****. Tonight I am so wired I feel I could take on the world, and I know that tomorrow morning I will once again be a shell of myself, shaking and struggling to think. May we all be delivered from this hell. I will keep praying for you and others.💕

Yea… May we all be delivered by this hell… Amen 🙏 

[Altostrata]

1 hour ago, AldstadtGirl said:

Would you suggest shaving tablet with microscale over dissolving and using a syringe?

 

This would be one method. As Arbor sent you in August, here are Tips for tapering off Prozac

 

That topic also explains how to make a liquid from a tablet. If you do not find your psychiatrist to be supportive, you might avoid discussing tapering with him or her.

[JesusSavemefromWD]

@AldstadtGirl

how are you doing? Have you stabilized on Prozac? I hope things are better for you 

[normalhuman]

I just wanted to mention that I’ve been dealing with Prozac withdrawal off & on since 2017 and a lot of your symptoms are the same as mine were. I also reinstated too high the first withdrawal to 20mg per Dr and eventually stabilized and slowly tapered again over a year but even got withdrawal then again, and reinstated at 3mg but stabilized again and am now tapering over the course of years every 3 months.  I also had severe joint pain, nausea, manic/depression type windows and waves etc. Those got better slowly for me by 4 & 8 months in respective withdrawals.  Anyway, one thing I figured out is that it takes about three months to stabilize after each dosage change which is much longer than even the one month recommendation based on Prozac’s half life. Also the eight week start up window also shows how long Prozac changes take. So just go super slow and consider waiting longer if you want to taper. I’m not saying this is necessarily the case for you but many withdrawals from Prozac take 2-3 months to kick in and reinstatement then takes equally long if not longer. It’s tricky med to taper & took me a really long time of severe error to figure it out. It will get better though the windows and waves are barely noticeable for me now and I started a slow taper again a year later.