Kate2301: Mirtazapane withdrawal post baby

[Kate2301]

Hi everyone

 

So I have been debating whether or not to add my situation or just continue to read the success stories as they really help me. I decided to add my own story as I’m hoping people can give me some hope!

 

So I had my daughter after a terrible pregnancy, I had a condition that put both baby and me at risk and I was rushed into hospital every week heavily bleeding. I was told each time that anything could happen and everytime I work up bleeding in the middle of the night I panicked that I was going to loose my little girl or die and leave my other daughter behind! 
 

This carried on for 15 weeks until eventually another heavy bleed left me in the operating theatre and baby girl was born.

we were both poorly for a week or 2 but eventually both of us went home.

 

I then discovered I was profusely sweating, especially at night time, and when I say sweating I mean getting up 3 times a night to change my underwear towel dry myself and change the sheets EVERY NIGHT!  
 

Anyway, this lack of sleep on top of baby crying all night left me sleep deprived, and like most mums this is fairly normal, I’ve been a new mum before but this was different, the sweats on top of baby crying left me with about 1 hour of broken sleep a night! We also had a house extension going on, my partner away at work and a teenager to care for…. I kept going to the doctors to see why I was sweating and they kept putting me on antibiotics, in total I had 6 courses over 4 months! 
I felt ok for about a month other then the lack of sleep the sweating subsided a bit, however I began to feel anxious for the first time in my life, I started to be panicking a bit and thinking negatively, then Covid came! I panicked further as a new mum I was worried I would get Covid and it would harm my baby, I started to have my first panic attack I couldn’t swallow properly and my body shock my mind raced, I rang the doctor and there and then he put me on 100mg of Sertraline (Zoloft) over the phone, I took the pill as I wanted the panic to stop, my body was shaking and that is where the hell really began!!! 
 

I felt like I was dieing, my body shook, my brain racing, I was vomiting, crying, shivering, heart racing, sweating, it was hell! A different doctor reduced the dose to 50mg and told me to keep going “it takes time for them to work” I stayed like this for 8 weeks, I didn’t eat, I didn’t sleep as every time I closed my eyes I was thrown straight back out in a panic. I went down to 6 stone, I kept ringing the doctor and all I was told was to carry on. At this point I needed help so I was recommended a homeopath, she gave me lots of different remedies that I didn’t know at the time probably made me worse. I just needed help, anything, I took vitamin injections I got acupuncture but nothing helped I got worse, I started having suicidal thoughts, I rang the doctor again and there and then they told me to stop, don’t take it again they said. So that’s what I did! In known to me I just cold Turkey!

I then spent the next 4 months in further hell, more of the same thing, anxiety through the roof, brain feeling foggy, weird thinking, heart palpitations no sleep no appetite. I also got the merina coil fitted, this made me feel even worse, I had no idea why??? I now assume this was due to my nervous system being sensitive, but it would be good for someone with any knowledge to confirm this? so when I thought I was going to die from weight loss I rang the doctor again, she prescribed me mirtazapane! I didn’t know I was in WD I just thought I was going mad!!
Initially it did nothing for me, after a few weeks I noticed my appetite increased and I could sleep, however I still always woke in a panic and the anxiety waves still came and went, especially around my period. However inbetween the waves I always felt “weird” I had No emotion,  no sympathy, no feelings and weird repetitive thinking.
 

at this point I just accepted I am doomed forever, I have something seriously wrong with me and no doctors will help. I continued to search and search for answers, I then saw a hormone specialist and after some extensive tests she concluded I had a hormone imbalance with having very high estrogeon low progesterone and extremely high cortisol!

 

I started natural progesterone and supplements to bring the cortisol down.

 

I then slowly began tapering off the Mirtazapane as I knew it didn’t let me feel normal, I felt weird all the time with no break, my anxiety was the same in waves so I started to reduce and eventually after 5/6 months I stopped (7 weeks ago)

 

i am now in WD from Mirtazapane, and maybe still the CT feom sertraline too I don’t know?! 
 

I feel strange and definitely experience the waves and windows, I had 3 good days last week I enjoyed my babies 2nd birthday, are and danced but now I’m feeling rubbish, I’m waiting for my period but it doesn’t seem to be coming, I find around this time in the month my symptoms get a lot worse,  I never suffered from any pms prior to AD’s so not sure why this is? Nervous system maybe?
 

I feel like I’ve been to hell and back and still there, I can’t wait to feel normal again and get through this, I feel like I’m living in a dream, like this is not real! The anxiety is awful I still can’t eat very well and I’m loosing weight, I can’t handle any stress, and feel overwhelmed with simple tasks.

 

im really hoping someone can provide me with some hope, some encouragement, and maybe tell me how this all happened to me as that’s something I ponder on frequently. Why did this happen?? I was fine before that panic attack, maybe I was just so sleep deprived and my hormones were all over the place and the stress of Covid just got too much? My hormone doctor thinks my cortisol was so high during pregnancy as it was so high risk it probably heightened even more when Covid hit and sent me over worrying! Unfortunately I then got prescribed that terrible tablet and the rest is history! 
 

anyway that’s my story, I just hope and pray one day I can read it back and it will all be in the past! 
 

xx

[getofflex]

Hello, and welcome to SA.  We are a peer owned and run forum of people who have been or are getting off of psychiatric drugs.  You really have been to hell and back.  That is quite a story!   I'm deeply sorry to hear about all the pain and anguish you have been through, and how the doctors did nothing to help you, and all they did only made you worse.  How is your baby girl?

 

Can you please give us specific information about your drug history for all drugs you are on and have been on, especially for the past 18-24 months?  It would be especially helpful to have the details of your drugs in a concise list (no symptoms), only drug names, specific dates (as best you can say for example early March if you don't recall the day) and dosages of each medication decrease or increase.  Please read the link below for instructions.  This will allow us to give you the best guidance.  

 

How to List Drug History in Signature

 

Here is some information about how these drugs actually work.  

 

How Psychiatric Drugs Remodel Your Brain

 

 

This helps you understand what withdrawal syndrome is: 

 

 Video on Recovery from Psych Drugs

 

What is Happening in Your Brain

 

What is Withdrawal Syndrome?

 

 

Also, as we are recovering, we suggest keeping things slow, simple, and stable. This is extremely important. 

 

Keep it Simple, Slow, and Stable

 

 

When we recover, there may be times of feeling OK mixed in with times of feeling bad.  This is called windows and waves.

 

Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

 

Here are some techniques to cope with symptoms: 

 

Acknowledge, Accept, Float

 

Non Drug Ways to Cope with Withdrawal Symptoms

 

 

We don't suggest many supplements, but 2 that many of us find helpful are magnesium and omega-3 fish oil. Here are the links for info about those. It is suggested to add one at a time, and start with a low dose to see how it affects you. 

Magnesium

 

Omega 3 Fish Oil

 

6 hours ago, Kate2301 said:

I also got the merina coil fitted, this made me feel even worse, I had no idea why??? I now assume this was due to my nervous system being sensitive, but it would be good for someone with any knowledge to confirm this?

I believe there is a good chance that the Mirena coil may have further affected your nervous system and made your WD symptoms worse.  The nervous system is intricately connected to every other system in our bodies, and changes in hormones can throw off our nervous systems, especially when they are sensitized by WD.  

 

6 hours ago, Kate2301 said:

i am now in WD from Mirtazapane, and maybe still the CT feom sertraline too I don’t know?! 

I agree, you are probably having WD from both the sertraline and the Mirtazapine.  

 

6 hours ago, Kate2301 said:

m really hoping someone can provide me with some hope, some encouragement, and maybe tell me how this all happened to me as that’s something I ponder on frequently. Why did this happen??

I personally believe, as do many others, that big pharma drug companies have taken over much of the health care industry, along with the insurance companies.  Unfortunately, doctors mainly deal with problems by dispensing drugs.  The vast majority of doctors are unaware of the problem of withdrawal from psych meds, and how to properly taper people off of them, which is extremely slowly.  It sounds like you had a very bad reaction to the Sertraline, and this started the ball rolling as far as your nervous system being destabilized.  When the other doctors did the other treatments, like the antibiotics, various homeopathic remedies, etc. this may also have further irritated an already very sensitive nervous system.  

 

When we see your drug signature, and know more about your drug history, we can make some suggestions. In the meantime, hang in there.  You will get better sooner or later as long as you take proper care of yourself.  You have come to the right place.  

[Kate2301]

Thank you I have updated my signature, still finding my feet with how to use this website, hope I have done it correctly 

[getofflex]

What dose of Mirtazapine were you on, and how did you taper?  It would help if you could add the dates, as best you can remember, and the dose of each reduction, thank you. What are your symptoms at this time?  

[Kate2301]

So the sertraline I CT as advised by the doctor, went into very very bad WD thought I was going to die, didn’t even know what WD was so was convinced by the doctor I need another AD as I thought I had lost my mind so agreed to take Mirt. Was increased to 30mg over a month or so when I realised what was going on and read about WD I started to taper myself over 5 months using liquid eventually, as I realised I was having waves (probably from sertraline CT) but in-between the waves I felt strange and I put this down to mirt,  So got off on a small amount left in syringe like a mm not sure the exact amount. I was right it was the mirt as those certain feeling I was having on a daily basis have now gone since stopping however now the symptoms  are on and off weird thinking, ruminating all day about WD and how I’m feeling etc crazy anxiety especially in the morning, generally not feeling like myself, nausea, racing mind (on certain days in the month) loss of weight (I’m very small already) headaches, blurred vision (again this comes and goes) heart palpitations. I do however now have moments / hours where I feel like my old self which is amazing but it doesn’t last very long, but now I know it is in there, the old me is still there!! 

[getofflex]

10 hours ago, Kate2301 said:

I do however now have moments / hours where I feel like my old self which is amazing but it doesn’t last very long, but now I know it is in there, the old me is still there!! 

This is really good!  This is the windows and waves pattern that we talk about.  How is your sleep? 

 

I suggest that you consider doing a small reinstatement of the liquid mirtazapine.  You are probably having withdrawal from that, and possibly still from going off the sertraline suddenly in May 2020.  (I wouldn't suggest you reinstate sertraline, as you have been off so long, and you had an adverse reaction to it.)

 

If you decide to reinstate, try going back to 1 mg of the mirtazapine to help alleviate the WD symptoms.  Stay on that for a while - it can take from several weeks to a couple of months for it to fully settle in your system.  Be sure you stay on precisely the same dose, at the same time each day.  Once you stabilize on this, then you can gradually and carefully taper off.  Please keep us posted on here.  If you feel immediately a lot worse after reinstating, stop the reinstatement right away.  Here is some more information on reinstatement.  

 

About Reinstating and Stabilizing to Reduce Withdrawal Symptoms

[Kate2301]

I’m afraid I am not prepared to reinstate I felt terrible on the drug too I feel like I’m making progress so I don’t want to go backwards I just can’t! I just feel very very sensitive to any stress, like ridiculously, it makes me anxious and feel sick and shaking and like I just cannot handle it, is this normal and does it get better as I’m normally fine with things like stress before any AD?! It’s concerning me that this is what il be like from now on and it’s frightening! 

[getofflex]

3 hours ago, Kate2301 said:

’m afraid I am not prepared to reinstate I felt terrible on the drug too I feel like I’m making progress so I don’t want to go backwards I just can’t!

No problem.  You alone know your own body, and what is best for you.  

 

3 hours ago, Kate2301 said:

I just feel very very sensitive to any stress, like ridiculously, it makes me anxious and feel sick and shaking and like I just cannot handle it, is this normal and does it get better

Yes, this is absolutely normal, and most people in WD experience this.  It gets better, but very gradually and slowly.  Have you tried the magnesium or omega 3 fish oil yet?  These can often help to calm us down.  See my first post for links about this.  It will get better, as long as you take care of yourself, and don't jump back on the drugs.  It just takes a long time.  Here is a link about that: 

 

Are We There Yet - How Long is Withdrawal Going to Take

[Greatful]

@Kate2301  Hi, I wanted to welcome you to SA.  It looks like you are another victim of  antidepressants, and the uniformed Doctors that prescribe them.  Rest assured you are not alone.  You will find a lot of support here, so post as much as you need. 

You are doing remarkable well trying to juggle WD and raise a young family.  

4 hours ago, Kate2301 said:

I just feel very very sensitive to any stress, like ridiculously, it makes me anxious and feel sick and shaking and like I just cannot handle it, is this normal

Yes, our central nervous systems are very unstable right now.  It is very easy to get over stimulated.  I know it is really hard with young children but try to keep things slow and easy. A schedule, lot's of down time, meditation, stay away from as much added stress as you can. Learn to say no to a lot of outside requests of your time.

 

Hang in there and know you will heal.  Your brain is repairing it's self everyday.❤️

 

[Kate2301]

Thank you for the reassurance. I do look at myself a year ago when I was in WD fro sertraline and I know I am way better then I was then so I’m trying to use this as motivation to keep going, it’s just so hard! That one phone call to the doctor changed everything and I’m just hoping I’m not permanently damaged from these drugs! 
I do sometimes think I must be improving as yesterday I wanted to put nail varnish on and looked for some new clothes, things my brain would never even consider 8 months ago! I’m praying I get better, I hate living like this 🙏

[getofflex]

8 hours ago, Kate2301 said:

I do look at myself a year ago when I was in WD fro sertraline and I know I am way better then I was then so I’m trying to use this as motivation to keep going, it’s just so hard!

I'm very glad to hear that you are better now that you were then.  Good job at seeing the glass as half full and being optimistic.  That is what recovery is all about - finding new ways to cope without drugs, and new ways of looking at things.  

 

I don't believe you are permanently damaged from these drugs, although it can certainly feel that way, since it takes so long to recover. Have you tried reading some of the success stories?  

 

Success Stories

[Kate2301]

Yes I read them all day everyday it’s the only thing that’s helping me get through this. 🙏 I just hope one day I can write my own x

[getofflex]

I'm glad you are doing that.  Please just hang on, and be super patient.  If you read the link above, you see that this can take months to years, I won't lie to you.  I know that sucks, but at least it comes to an end eventually. 

[Kate2301]

So a little update….. I had my daughters birthday and as mentioned I had 3 days of feeling a lot better, I then felt worse again hence when I wrote my first post. I had a holiday planned to visit family in Spain and really felt terrible for my kids and partner as I really didn’t want to go, the dread of being with other family and them not understanding what is wrong with me when I feel dreadful was overwhelming but I pushed myself! I got on that plane and weirdly had the most relaxing journey even though I am petrified of flying?! Maybe everything I’ve been through is just so much worse then even my worst fear now? I also had my 2 year old and thought it was be so stressful but I was fine! The day after arriving I had a wave and thought oh no…. Stuck in Spain feeling doomed with anxiety and panic but it went and the rest of the holiday I felt good! Even managed to nod off laying on the sun lounger which I haven’t been able to do, also slept like a baby every night!

anyway we came home and I had a wave for a day again and that was 2 weeks ago, I had another wave last Saturday inbetween all that I don’t feel terrible but I don’t feel great? Does that make sense? Is this normal at this point? I feel quite overwhelmed with stress still, so simple things like managing my tantrum throwing 2 year old whilst cooking dinner while send me into a really anxious state when prior to the drugs I was so chilled it just wouldn’t get to me! Is this normal?

I also find sometimes that inbetween waves I feel no anxiety, no low mood but just “weird” but of an inner nervous feeling is this normal?

if anyone that has felt these feeling and overcome them can drop me a mention I would appreciate it.

on the positive this week in 1.5 years has been the first week I have been able to sit at my laptop and properly work, and take in information. I actually feel like a semi good manager again, 3 months ago I hid behind my screen like a zombie!

I also look back and realise things have improved without me really realising it, I guess this happens right?

[getofflex]

7 hours ago, Kate2301 said:

Maybe everything I’ve been through is just so much worse then even my worst fear now?

Yes, this withdrawal certainly changes our perspective, doesn't it.  It sounds like you are gaining inner strength from the trials of withdrawal.  I'm glad to hear that your trip to Spain went better than expected.  It's great that you slept well every night.  

 

7 hours ago, Kate2301 said:

anyway we came home and I had a wave for a day again and that was 2 weeks ago, I had another wave last Saturday inbetween all that I don’t feel terrible but I don’t feel great? Does that make sense? Is this normal at this point? I feel quite overwhelmed with stress still, so simple things like managing my tantrum throwing 2 year old whilst cooking dinner while send me into a really anxious state when prior to the drugs I was so chilled it just wouldn’t get to me! Is this normal?

Yes, this is typical for recovery from psych meds.   You are describing the windows and waves pattern we talk about so much here.  It is classic of AD WD.  Perhaps the reason you were so chilled in the past was the drugs were numbing out your emotions.  I believe when we then come off these drugs, our emotions are in an amplified state.  We call this neuro emotion.  

 

 Neuro Emotions

 

7 hours ago, Kate2301 said:

I also find sometimes that inbetween waves I feel no anxiety, no low mood but just “weird” but of an inner nervous feeling is this normal?

I believe it is.  Our nervous system tend to be activated while in WD.  I personally have found anxiety and nervousness to be one of the most common WD symptoms. 

 

7 hours ago, Kate2301 said:

on the positive this week in 1.5 years has been the first week I have been able to sit at my laptop and properly work, and take in information. I actually feel like a semi good manager again, 3 months ago I hid behind my screen like a zombie!

I also look back and realise things have improved without me really realising it, I guess this happens right?

This is wonderful!  You are definitely healing and on the right track.  Yes, improvement happens so slowly, that we don't even realize it, until we look back and say "yes, I'm better than I was a year ago".  I've done this myself.  

 

Thanks for giving us an update - I think you are doing great!  

[Kate2301]

Getofflex thank you so much for your response. I just wanted to point out that when I said “before I would be very chilled about situations” I meant before I started any AD. As soon as I started them was when the anxiousness and inability to handle stress began!

hopefully I’m on the right path now! I really really hope 

 

[getofflex]

Ah, thanks for the clarification. I believe you are on the right path!  

[Kate2301]

Can I ask any experts on here….. is it known of that stopping and AD can stop your menstural cycle? Ever since stopping Mirt 10 weeks ago I have not had a period and now it’s worrying me which I don’t need.

im not pregnant and in my thirties, I did notice whilst on AD that my periods were really messed up and caused severe PMS however literally since stopping them I haven’t had a period, is there any research or info on this that can help reassure me? 

[getofflex]

5 hours ago, Kate2301 said:

Can I ask any experts on here….. is it known of that stopping and AD can stop your menstural cycle? Ever since stopping Mirt 10 weeks ago I have not had a period and now it’s worrying me which I don’t need.

I'm certainly no expert, but I started a too fast taper of Lexapro at age 56, and my periods went from being regular to stopping completely that very month.  I've been post menopausal since.  However I realize I'm a lot older than you, but from this I suspect that being on AD's and WD seems to affect our cycles and hormones.  

 

Here is a thread about that: 

 

PMS, PMDD, and Menstrual Cycle Issues During WD

 

For the future, you can do a  google search on "survivingantidepressants.org period" or survivingantidepressants.org menstrual", etc.  

[Kate2301]

Can anybody tell me if when I’m a window (this is when I class myself in a window as I can function without insane anxiety) I still have this inner nervousness, hard to explain but just a feeling that my mind and body aren’t calm, is this normal or am I supposed to feel completely myself when I’m a window? Can anyone who has successfully been through tell me if their last symptom to go was this inner nervousness? 

[getofflex]

I have often had that inner nervousness as well.  When we are in WD, our nervous system tend to be over activated.  As our system recovers, this symptom improves.  As time goes on, this inner nervousness gradually decreases.  This will eventually go away, but it may come and go for a while before it completely disappears.  I don't know if we are supposed to feel completely like ourselves during a window.  My own inner nervousness (anxiety) has decreased a lot, and I have many days where I don't have this.  I believe you will too. 

[Kate2301]

So my windows have become a lot more “normal” the inner nervousness has subsided and I can go a few hours feeling happy and completely myself, however what I have now found is I wake in the morning and feel good then by early afternoon my mind starts to become vulnerable and I start to have anxious thoughts again, this can be anything from worrying about family, worrying about my WD then it subsides, it’s the same pattern over the last week or two is this normal? 
most great that I do feel good now in a window but I’m worrying this anxious mind in the afternoon is now me?! I’be not got anything to worry about but it just starts out of nowhere?! Can anyone tell if this happens? 

[getofflex]

22 hours ago, Kate2301 said:

So my windows have become a lot more “normal” the inner nervousness has subsided and I can go a few hours feeling happy and completely myself,

That's wonderful!  

 

22 hours ago, Kate2301 said:

however what I have now found is I wake in the morning and feel good then by early afternoon my mind starts to become vulnerable and I start to have anxious thoughts again, this can be anything from worrying about family, worrying about my WD then it subsides, it’s the same pattern over the last week or two is this normal? 

I see you are taking supplements.  Which supplements are you taking, and what time o'clock do you take each one, and what dosage?  Please put this in your drug signature.  Then I can have a better idea of what is going on for you.  

[Kate2301]

I don’t take any supplements now, I went away and forgot one day and found I felt better the next day so stopped altogether and definitely feel better for not taking anything. Just this weird anxious mind comes on out of nowhere, in fact since writing the about post I had a fairly normal and good 1.5 days then about an hour ago it came on again, sleep is a bit strange at the moment too, like I’m waking more and very vivid dreams??

[getofflex]

2 hours ago, Kate2301 said:

definitely feel better for not taking anything

That's good to know.  It's why we generally don't recommend many supplements other than magnesium and omega 3.  

 

You just need time and patience, your nervous system is still working out the kinks from getting off the psych meds.  It often takes many months, and sometimes years.  

[Daisygirlsk]

On 9/16/2021 at 12:54 AM, Kate2301 said:

Can I ask any experts on here….. is it known of that stopping and AD can stop your menstural cycle? Ever since stopping Mirt 10 weeks ago I have not had a period and now it’s worrying me which I don’t need.

im not pregnant and in my thirties, I did notice whilst on AD that my periods were really messed up and caused severe PMS however literally since stopping them I haven’t had a period, is there any research or info on this that can help reassure me? 

My period stopped for 6 months when i stopped antidepressants.

[getofflex]

My period stopped permanently the month I started my fast taper of Lexapro in 2017.  I was 56 at the time. Do a search on google “survivingantidepressants.org periods”.  You will come up with threads here that deal with these issues.  

[Kate2301]

Can anyone that is recovered help with a question?

 

So I’ve been going through windows and waves (I think) although only recently started feeling “normal” in a window but I think that is ok that it’s only every now and again.

 

im wondering if anyone who has recovered fully can help me understand if what I’m experiencing now is normal symptom of recovery? So I dont really feel good or happy just a bit of a feeling that my brain can’t relax and calm. If I’m distracted constantly like this past weekend I feel it’s at the back of my mind, then when I’m alone like today and less distracted it comes to the front of my mind again and I find myself self talking in my head all day about WD. Is this something that gradually goes or am I always going to wake and spend my days thinking about how I’m feeling? 
I have noticed improvements in terms of anxiety and vivid dreams and bad sleep etc, that’s all seems to be better but I have this constant feeling like I can’t mentally relax, physically I’m fine.

 

I also wondered if anyone that recovered finally feels like they are through it and it won’t haunt them forever? And last thing…. it it normal at 14 weeks off to be sensitive towards certain situations I.e if I see something on tv related to mental health or antidepressants etc my brain seems to feel anxious and foggy, does this get better in time? 🙏 none of these things were an issue before AD 

 

Edited April 5, 2022 by ChessieCat
added topic title before merging with intro topic and spacing

[ChessieCat]

Hi Kate,

 

Looks like you haven't seen the Success Forum.

 

success-stories-recovery-from-psychiatric-drug-withdrawal

 

I suggest you also check out the excellent information here.  See Post #1:

 

are-we-there-yet-how-long-is-withdrawal-going-to-take

 

[Kate2301]

Yes I have seen the success posts and have probably read each one 100 times over, just wondered if there was anyone that could respond to my exact symptoms at this stage? Just wondering if this is me now and would love  to be able to relate to someone who has come through what I’m experiencing now.

[Hudgens]

I thought about tapering while I was tapering most of the day. My tapering ended 7 years ago and I almost never think about any of it. When it's no longer a big deal, it's no longer a big deal.

[JustaGirl]

Hey Kate, how are you feeling now? Your story sounds quite similar to mine but you're a few months ahead of me... I was put on Zoloft a few weeks after having a new baby because I was really emotional and obsessing about his name. Looking back I think it was just my postnatal hormones taking a while to settle and I just needed time, I was so happy with everything in my life! It was such a huge mistake taking those tablets and didn't think it seemed right to take antidepressants when I wasn't depressed but I blindly trusted the doctors. Anyway Zoloft made me feel bad from day 1 but the doctors told me to keep taking it, eventually it sent me to terrifying places I didn't know existed, made me feel completely not like myself and have scary suicidal thoughts. After 6 weeks I got switched to Effexor so I'm on that now and feel okay but very emotionally numb. I just want to get off these awful drugs and feel fully like myself again and have my full feelings back but I'm also terrified of withdrawal sending me back to the places Zoloft did. How did you taper the Mitrazapine?

[Kate2301]

Hey!

thanks for reaching out, I’m blown away by how similar our stories are, do you mind me asking how old your baby was when first put on an AD?

I had a traumatic pregnancy and labour and after she was born I began being anxious of her or me being ill, I don’t normally worry about that but I think my hormones were crazy and unsettled and I’d been through a rough time, instead of therapy or support I was plonked straight in AD and felt like I was about to die. Obviously then I was in WD and put on another one I’m now 4 months off and feeling closer to my old self then ever over the last 2 years so I know it was th WD rugs making me so ill and so much worse, it does take time though I’m slowly slowly seeing my emotions and normal feelings coming back but in windows at the moment not all the time but I’m so glad I’m off! How old is your baby now? I found it extra hard having a baby as I couldn’t feel all the emotions I should be, I was never relaxed, now I have windows of feeling a lot better but not quite there yet!

i tapered off mirtazapane but realistically too fast! I did it with liquid over about 4 months but I’m glad I’m off now. Let me know if you ever want to chat x

[JustaGirl]

Hey @Kate2301 I've messaged you so I don't hijack your story thread 

[Kate2301]

Anyone who has healed can you help advise?

 

Hello everyone!

 

I haven’t wrote on here for a while and have been considering it, I felt weird I suppose almost like I’m going backwards by writing a post because I haven’t for so long but then I thought sod it, we are here to help each other right?

 

so I am 9 month post AD I won’t go into too much detail but I was put on after a bad reaction to a contraceptive pill, a pill that contained only one synthetic hormone and I had never had before. This pill has since had a warning added to the leaflet due to the world health organisation recognising it causes severe mental health issues in a large number of of women. Anyway…… I was put on an AD as my doctor didn’t recognise this at the time and I then decided to come off the AD after feeling even worst on it.

 

I am now 9 months post AD and I know I feel better then I did months ago, I can eat and sleep etc but I just really wanted to reach out to those that have healed to ask them how they felt at this stage? 

I often feel it’s “hard” to explain how I feel now? I’m not anxious I’m not depressed I just have this horrible feeling within me?? I have the windows and waves and they do seem to not be as extreme as they once were, my days seem to flow onto one another and I don’t really know if I’m in a window or a wave I just feel “meh” I can’t enjoy life yet, I can’t have a lot of fun unless I’m really distracted, if I’m distracted I do seem to be able to feel good again but my motivation to be around people and get dressed up really nice and go out and have fun and even go to the gym and work out just isn’t there? I also sometimes have this inner restlessness mentally like this uncomfortable mental feeling?

did anyone that healed feel this way and did this improve? I just don’t know how to explain it, I feel a bit low I suppose and unmotivated and not myself still, is this normal? 

 

Edited April 5, 2022 by ChessieCat
added topic title before merging with intro topic & spacing

[ChessieCat]

I've merged all 3 your topics.  Your Introduction topic is the best place to ask questions and journal your progress.  This keeps your history in one place and means you do not have the repeat your story.

 

On 10/25/2021 at 10:44 PM, Kate2301 said:

just wondered if there was anyone that could respond to my exact symptoms at this stage

 

There are many existing topics where members discuss various symptoms.  You could try doing a site search or using an internet search engine and add site:survivingantidepressants.org to the search term.

 

10 hours ago, Kate2301 said:

I am now 9 months post AD and I know I feel better then I did months ago, I can eat and sleep etc but I just really wanted to reach out to those that have healed to ask them how they felt at this stage?

 

Being able to sleep and eat are good signs.  Recovery is happening.

 

It is better to compare how you feel now with how you felt at your worse, not how you felt at your best or how you want to feel.

 

Video:  Healing From Antidepressants - Patterns of Recovery

 

Brain Remodelling

What is Happening in Your Brain

 

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