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☼ Seer: Lexapro CT - currently in windows/waves of withdrawal


Seer

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Hello all,

 

I'll start this off with an introduction on how I got here.

 

Back in September 2020 I was driven to the ER for what I now know was a panic attack (heart racing, blurry vision, dizziness, etc.).

I saw a neurologist at the ER, whom I followed up with shortly after in October 2020. The neurologist took one look at me, told me I was anxious, and sent me out the door with a prescription for 10mg Lexapro (which is unfortunately far too common). I started taking this on 10/20/2021. The first week on this seemed to amplify all anxious symptoms, but then surprisingly made me feel great (calmer, more energized, optimistic, etc.). I didn't ask questions as I was fairly naive at the time and trusted the neurologist's decision. A few months in I started experiencing days of extreme fatigue, and random bouts of dizziness/blurred vision. I managed to ignore these and attributed them to migraines.

 

Fast forward to February 2021. The days of fatigue and random bouts of dizziness/blurred vision are still happening, yet more frequently. I also noticed a general sense of feeling numb, as if things did not matter as much. I remember one day I forgot to take my dose (for the first time) and I made it until about noon at work. Symptoms were extreme fatigue, dizziness, head pressure, racing heart and a few more that I can't remember. Once again, I was naive and still didn't consider Lexapro as the issue. The next day I took my normal dose and everything returned back to normal.

 

It's now March 2021. For some reason I decided to start questioning the efficacy of the Lexapro as I was starting to have anxious symptoms yet again. I also had a profound realization that I had become dependent on this drug to function day-to-day in order to "manage" my anxiety, and would be for the rest of my life. This is when I began my research (engineer by trade, heavily science/statistically driven), and to say I was shocked is an understatement. SSRI's are prescribed based on a theory, there is no scientific evidence that has proved SSRI's do what they are intended to do. The primary driver is anecdotal evidence, which absolutely blew my mind (once again, engineering perspective). I'm sure these drugs are helpful to some people, but oh my is this interesting. Journalist Robert Whitaker summarizes the history/efficacy of psychiatric drugs brilliantly, check him out if you haven't already.

 

I was aware of 'potential' withdrawal symptoms through brief internet research (unfortunately did not find SA until 3 months off), was willing to tough it out for a few weeks and I quit cold turkey on March 4th 2021.

 

As many of you have unfortunately experienced, nothing could have prepared me for what would happen during the coming months. The acute withdrawal phase hit almost immediately, parking me in bed for a few days followed by another week of dragging myself around. Over the next few weeks I had the typical symptoms: brain zaps, extreme fatigue, dizziness, headaches/head pressure, chest pain, muscle aches, panic attacks, and many many more. At the end of March I began to feel fairly normal and could function enough to return to daily activities. Fast forward to June 2021 and I got absolutely slammed with withdrawal symptoms. The mental/psychological symptoms were intense and frightening as the only psychological issues I have had in the past was anxiety. These consisted of: intrusive thoughts, DP/DR, OCD, insomnia, depression, extreme anxiety (way worse than pre-lexapro), anhedonia and some more I can't remember. Physical symptoms were: DIZZINESS (this was by far my worst physical symptom), tinnitus, extreme fatigue, migraines, neck stiffness, pins/needles, light sensitivity, chest pain, and just about every other symptoms you've read about. I have been to almost every doctor/specialist you could think of and according to modern medicine I was the 'healthiest person' they've seen. I had started to lose faith in modern medicine and begun to look for solutions myself.....

 

Then I found SA and everything made sense. I have been reading many of the stories here (mostly success :)) and I cannot thank the people here enough for the information/hope that is provided.

 

Anyway, here I am 7+ months after quitting Lexapro cold turkey. I have been in the windows/waves pattern for the past 4 months with noticeable improvements. I was actually debating on posting a success story last week because I had been feeling so great, but unfortunately a wave hit - although minor in comparison to the beginning. This has consisted of insomnia, intrusive thoughts, minor DP/DR, light sensitivity and generally feeling out of it.

 

So that's about it. I will continue to update this post accordingly as time goes on, and eventually will post my success story.
 

Cheers,

 

- Seer

 

 

 

 

Started Lexapro on 10/20/2020 at 10mg.

 

CT quit Lexapro on 3/04/2021.

 

Acute withdrawal hit almost immediately. Windows/wave pattern ever since.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hello, and welcome to SA.  We are a volunteer-run community of people who have been or are getting off of psychiatric drugs.  You have come to the right place!  Congratulations on quitting Lexapro!  I'm almost off of this nasty drug myself.  All the symptoms your mentioned are classic for withdrawal from SSRI drugs.  It's fantastic that you are seeing noticeable improvements!  You are well on your way to recovery.  

 

I'll give you some links to help you understand your situation.  You may have already read many of these, but SA has a huge amount of info, so I'll go ahead and give them to you just in case.  

 

Here is some information about how these drugs actually work.   This explains why we get symptoms from going off of these medications.

 

How Psychiatric Drugs Remodel Your Brain

 

 

This helps you understand what withdrawal syndrome is: 

 

Video on Recovery from Psych Drugs

 

What is Happening in Your Brain

 

Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

 

This link gives a list of many of the symptoms of withdrawal:  

 

Glenmullen Withdrawal Checklist

 

Here are some techniques to cope with symptoms: 

 

Non Drug Ways to Cope with Withdrawal Symptoms

 

 

We don't suggest many supplements, but 2 that many of us find helpful are magnesium and omega-3 fish oil. Here are the links for info about those. It is suggested to add one at a time, and start with a low dose to see how it affects you. 


Magnesium

 

Omega 3 Fish Oil

 

Please keep us posted on how you are doing.  Take care! 

Please do not private message me.  Only tag me for urgent questions about tapering and reinstating - thank you.  

 

***Please note this is not medical advice.  Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a doctor who understands psych meds and how to withdraw from them, if you can find one.

 

Lexapro   Started Apr 15 2010 - 10 mg;  started taper August 2017, recent taper info: Apr 2 '20  0.18 mg; Jul 16  0.17 mg, Aug 23  0.16 mg, Oct 7  0.15 mg, Nov 8 - 0.14, Jan 16 '21 - 0.13, Feb 7 - 0.12, Feb 22 - 0.11, Mar 26 - 0.10, May 21 - 0.09, June 15 - 0.08 Aug 16 - 0.07, Oct 6 - 0.06, Nov 21 0.05, Dec. 17 0.04, Jan 14 '22 0.03, Feb 19 0.02, Apr 18 0.01, May 15 0.005,  Jul 8, 0.00.  Psych Drug Free as of July 8, 2022!!  Woohoo!!!

other meds: Levothyroxine 75 mg

magnesium in small amounts at 4 AM, before bed

suppl AM: fish oil, flax oil, vit C, vit E, multivitamin, zinc

suppl 8 PM: magnesium 350 mg, extended release vitamin C, melatonin 2 mg

 

Paxil 2002 - 2010, switched to Lexapro 2010 

Trazodone 50 mg. 2002 - 2019, fast tapered in 2019 

Xanax 0.5 mg as needed 2002 - 2019, up to 3x weekly 

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  • 2 weeks later...

Hello!

 

Here's an update on how this is going:

 

Over the past 10 days I've had 3 good-great days, 2 decent days and 5 bad days, with 1/5 being very bad.

 

The most troubling symptoms continue to be DP/DR, insomnia + fatigue, intrusive thoughts and light sensitivity. During the very bad day I had flu-like symptoms (this has been common during waves throughout my experience) as well as migraine symptoms. 

 

I would like to also mention I attended a wedding this past weekend (did not drink) and was able to function, hold conversations and engage for the entire 8 hours - something I didn't think would be possible. This is a big milestone :) 

 

It seems like I've hit a shorter turnaround of windows/waves, where as in the past I'd have week-month long waves and day-week windows.

 

From what I've seen here this seems to be common, but any additional comments/guidance would be appreciated!

 

- Seer

 

Started Lexapro on 10/20/2020 at 10mg.

 

CT quit Lexapro on 3/04/2021.

 

Acute withdrawal hit almost immediately. Windows/wave pattern ever since.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

It sounds as though you are having the windows and waves pattern of recovery, which is very typical of antidepressant withdrawal.  I'm glad you did not drink at the wedding.  

 

Here are some things you can do to help your nervous system to heal: 

 

1) avoid all alcohol and any other mind altering substances 

 

2) avoid intense exercise, unless it does not affect you.  Exercise stimulates adrenaline and cortisol, which activates the nervous system and creates or intensifies anxiety, sleeplessness, agitation, etc.  

 

3) avoid major stressors if possible

 

4) avoid negative, toxic, overly dramatic people 

 

5) do gentle exercise each day, such as walking 

 

6) get outside for natural light (even on cloudy days there is lots of natural light outside). 

 

7) get out in nature 

 

😎 eat healthy, natural foods.  Stay away from MSG and aspartame, which are exitotoxins for the nervous system. 

 

9) take magnesium and omega 3 supplements.  See post 1 for more details.  

 

10) have a routine - regular bedtimes, wake up time, mealtimes, etc.  

 

11) avoid catastrophic thinking, negative ruminations, forgive people who have hurt you in the past.  Try to be optimistic.  

 

12) take time to rest and recharge

 

12) never forget that in time, you will heal, even if it doesn't feel like now.  Try reading some success stories on the home page of the website. 

Please do not private message me.  Only tag me for urgent questions about tapering and reinstating - thank you.  

 

***Please note this is not medical advice.  Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a doctor who understands psych meds and how to withdraw from them, if you can find one.

 

Lexapro   Started Apr 15 2010 - 10 mg;  started taper August 2017, recent taper info: Apr 2 '20  0.18 mg; Jul 16  0.17 mg, Aug 23  0.16 mg, Oct 7  0.15 mg, Nov 8 - 0.14, Jan 16 '21 - 0.13, Feb 7 - 0.12, Feb 22 - 0.11, Mar 26 - 0.10, May 21 - 0.09, June 15 - 0.08 Aug 16 - 0.07, Oct 6 - 0.06, Nov 21 0.05, Dec. 17 0.04, Jan 14 '22 0.03, Feb 19 0.02, Apr 18 0.01, May 15 0.005,  Jul 8, 0.00.  Psych Drug Free as of July 8, 2022!!  Woohoo!!!

other meds: Levothyroxine 75 mg

magnesium in small amounts at 4 AM, before bed

suppl AM: fish oil, flax oil, vit C, vit E, multivitamin, zinc

suppl 8 PM: magnesium 350 mg, extended release vitamin C, melatonin 2 mg

 

Paxil 2002 - 2010, switched to Lexapro 2010 

Trazodone 50 mg. 2002 - 2019, fast tapered in 2019 

Xanax 0.5 mg as needed 2002 - 2019, up to 3x weekly 

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  • 2 weeks later...

@getofflex thank you for the helpful tips, it is much appreciated.

 

It's been 2 weeks since my last update, here it is:

 

Week 36:

I have been hit by a huge wave, with all 14 days being bad to very bad. The most troubling symptoms are: DP/DR, emotional numbness/apathy, irrational irritability & frustration, depression, dizziness, fatigue, intrusive thoughts.
I would say this is the 2nd most intense wave I've been hit by, the most intense was around 5 months with similar symptoms. 

 

I've been reading a lot of success stories lately (S/O @Aeroman, @KenA, @pug and more, you guys are the BEST) that have provided unmeasurable help. Each time I try to convince myself I will never heal, this is something else, I read these over and over again.

 

An open question to everyone: The most disturbing of my symptoms is the intrusive thoughts that "none of this matters" "this isn't real" "what's the point of life anyways" etc. I have never experienced these prior to w/d, yet they continue to bombard me on a daily basis. Has anyone else experienced similar thoughts? I'm optimistic they will go away with time, but any comments would be appreciated.

 

Thank you all,

 

- Seer

Started Lexapro on 10/20/2020 at 10mg.

 

CT quit Lexapro on 3/04/2021.

 

Acute withdrawal hit almost immediately. Windows/wave pattern ever since.

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  • Moderator Emeritus
22 minutes ago, Seer said:

@getofflex thank you for the helpful tips, it is much appreciated.

 

It's been 2 weeks since my last update, here it is:

 

Week 36:

I have been hit by a huge wave, with all 14 days being bad to very bad. The most troubling symptoms are: DP/DR, emotional numbness/apathy, irrational irritability & frustration, depression, dizziness, fatigue, intrusive thoughts.
I would say this is the 2nd most intense wave I've been hit by, the most intense was around 5 months with similar symptoms. 

 

I've been reading a lot of success stories lately (S/O @Aeroman, @KenA, @pug and more, you guys are the BEST) that have provided unmeasurable help. Each time I try to convince myself I will never heal, this is something else, I read these over and over again.

 

An open question to everyone: The most disturbing of my symptoms is the intrusive thoughts that "none of this matters" "this isn't real" "what's the point of life anyways" etc. I have never experienced these prior to w/d, yet they continue to bombard me on a daily basis. Has anyone else experienced similar thoughts? I'm optimistic they will go away with time, but any comments would be appreciated.

 

Thank you all,

 

- Seer

Hi Seer, you are going through anxiety/panic attacks, right?  Intrusive thoughts/racing mind may be also part of the anxiety stuff.  I have had them.  The more I tried to make them stop, the more they came.  What I did was use the Dr. Claire Weekes' method and let them be.  Don't try to stop them - they are "just" thoughts.  They will snuff themselves out overtime.

Lexparo 10mg user for 2.5 years. Last dose was 2/27/2008 after a fast 1 month taper. Recovered around 2011. Had issues with depression, anxiety, akathasia, inner restlessness, vertigo, insomnia, loss of appetite, eye floaters just to name a few. Basically rode it out, employing the Dr. Claire Weekes method.

 

Took Cipro in July of 2014 and have been having set backs with nausea, vertigo, anxiety (racing thoughts), and depression the last half of 2014.

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  • Moderator Emeritus
1 hour ago, Seer said:

I've been reading a lot of success stories lately (S/O @Aeroman, @KenA, @pug and more, you guys are the BEST) that have provided unmeasurable help. Each time I try to convince myself I will never heal, this is something else, I read these over and over again.

I'm glad the success stories are so helpful.  It's easy to believe we will never heal, because when we are in a wave, our brain fools us into thinking we are in a different world from which we will never escape.  

 

1 hour ago, Seer said:

The most disturbing of my symptoms is the intrusive thoughts that "none of this matters" "this isn't real" "what's the point of life anyways" etc. I have never experienced these prior to w/d, yet they continue to bombard me on a daily basis. Has anyone else experienced similar thoughts?

Ohh, yes.  I must confess that I occasionally get these thoughts too.  It's important to realize that thoughts, especially from a WD brain on fire, are not always based on facts.  This technique may help: 

 

APPLE Technique

 

I just came across a very nice technique that really helps me.  It's called APPLE. I have printed it and have it where I can see it every day and be reminded of it so I internalize this technique. 

 

A - Acknowledge Notice and acknowledge the thought or uncertainty as it comes to mind. 

 

P - Pause Don't react as you normally do.  Don't react at all.  Just pause and breathe.   

 

P - Pull Back Tell yourself this is just the thought or worry talking, and this apparent need for worry or analysis or certainty is not helpful and not necessary.  It is only a thought or feeling.  Don't believe everything you think.  Thoughts are not statements or facts.   

 

L - Let Go Let go of the thought or feeling.  It will pass.  You don't have to respond to it.  You might imagine the thought floating away in a bubble or cloud.   

 

E - Explore Explore the present moment, because right now, in this moment, you are OK.  Notice your breathing and the sensations of your breathing.  Notice the ground beneath you.  Look around and notice what you see, what you hear, what you can touch, what you can smell.  Right now.  Then shift your focus of attention to something else - on what you need to do, on what you were doing before you noticed the thought or worry, or do something else - mindfully - with your full attention.  

Please do not private message me.  Only tag me for urgent questions about tapering and reinstating - thank you.  

 

***Please note this is not medical advice.  Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a doctor who understands psych meds and how to withdraw from them, if you can find one.

 

Lexapro   Started Apr 15 2010 - 10 mg;  started taper August 2017, recent taper info: Apr 2 '20  0.18 mg; Jul 16  0.17 mg, Aug 23  0.16 mg, Oct 7  0.15 mg, Nov 8 - 0.14, Jan 16 '21 - 0.13, Feb 7 - 0.12, Feb 22 - 0.11, Mar 26 - 0.10, May 21 - 0.09, June 15 - 0.08 Aug 16 - 0.07, Oct 6 - 0.06, Nov 21 0.05, Dec. 17 0.04, Jan 14 '22 0.03, Feb 19 0.02, Apr 18 0.01, May 15 0.005,  Jul 8, 0.00.  Psych Drug Free as of July 8, 2022!!  Woohoo!!!

other meds: Levothyroxine 75 mg

magnesium in small amounts at 4 AM, before bed

suppl AM: fish oil, flax oil, vit C, vit E, multivitamin, zinc

suppl 8 PM: magnesium 350 mg, extended release vitamin C, melatonin 2 mg

 

Paxil 2002 - 2010, switched to Lexapro 2010 

Trazodone 50 mg. 2002 - 2019, fast tapered in 2019 

Xanax 0.5 mg as needed 2002 - 2019, up to 3x weekly 

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  • 2 weeks later...

@Aeroman Thank you for the reply sir! I appreciate this advice, I read her book and thought I was accepting my situation but the more I thought about it I haven't completely accepted my symptoms. I play her audios on YouTube daily and this has been helping! I also read the book DARE by Barry McDonagh which seems to be a modern take on Dr. Weekes' methods.

 

@getofflex Thank you for the advice, much appreciated! I love this acronym, very smilier to Dr. Weekes' methodology. This experience has forced me to (try) understand our brains since knowledge has always helped me dispel fear. It's interesting, once conscious of our thoughts to realize we are NOT our thoughts. I've utilized mediation to practice this separation, which has helped!

 

Week 38 (few days early):

 

The wave from my previous post cleared up around Week 37 and I have a fantastic 6 day window where I've felt the best I have since pre-medications. Unfortunately I've got thrown into another wave as of 3 days ago, with all of the same symptoms from my previous post returning - insomnia has been the worst. I will note that although back into a wave, I'm much more capable of coping with the symptoms, albeit sometimes they get the best of me.

 

I've had a vacation planned for this week for a long time and alllllmost talked myself out of going, but here I am at the airport! Full of anxiety and DP/DR but I've decided this isn't going to continue to steal life away from me. Accept the symptoms and push through!

 

- Seer

 

Started Lexapro on 10/20/2020 at 10mg.

 

CT quit Lexapro on 3/04/2021.

 

Acute withdrawal hit almost immediately. Windows/wave pattern ever since.

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Another update,

 

This wave has increased in intensity and I was forced to head home early. Insomnia & fatigue, dizziness, intrusive thoughts, flu like symptoms, heightened anxiety.

 

It's very hard for me to believe this is still WD almost 9 months out, but I've ruled out everything else. This too shall pass....

 

- Seer

Started Lexapro on 10/20/2020 at 10mg.

 

CT quit Lexapro on 3/04/2021.

 

Acute withdrawal hit almost immediately. Windows/wave pattern ever since.

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1 hour ago, Seer said:

Another update,

 

This wave has increased in intensity and I was forced to head home early. Insomnia & fatigue, dizziness, intrusive thoughts, flu like symptoms, heightened anxiety.

 

It's very hard for me to believe this is still WD almost 9 months out, but I've ruled out everything else. This too shall pass....

 

- Seer

Have no doubt it’s withdrawl. I was on a low dose of Zoloft fir few weeks, got addicted very fast, 13 months later I am still dealing with withdrawal. The effects of these drugs are long lasting, despite doctors saying the go away in couple of weeks. But time heals everything at the end, we just don’t know how long it ll take for each person and that makes things even much more difficult.

Aug. 16-17, 2020, cipralex: went CRAZY! Recovered in 24hrs

Aug.28,2020; 3.5 weeks 25mg sertraline/4.5 weeks taper

Oct. 25: Last dose (4mg)

Symptoms while on zoloft

DPDR/out of my body/soul despair/feeling dead; tinnitus/no appetite; fear, anxiety/panics

4 months OFF: soul despair, anxiety/fear, brain disconnection/ DPDR, brain feels swollen-numb/crazy/bedridden barely functioning, tinnitus, eye lid twitches; face spasms. Feeling slightly better after 10pm.

- sleep & appetite are fine

9 months OFF: hell, no windows, same symptoms as above  (only eye and face twitches have stopped) plus intense arm/shoulder pain and visual issues. Tinnitus replaced by head buzzing. 

10 months-1 year: all above plus Insomnia (out of nowhere), depression, no peace of mind (mental Akathisia); 2.5mg melatonin

14months off: sleep resumed. All rest symptoms remain. Bedridden vegetable all day. DP is relentless. 

1.5 years off: still severely disabled, not much changed except some improvement in vision.

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  • 6 months later...

Hello friends,

I haven't updated in a while, so here it is:

 

I would like to start out by saying I have had days of feeling 100% normal, symptom free. I have also had weeks of minimum symptoms (long windows). I am feeling confident I will make a full recovery. 

 

I have kept a chart of what I am calling 'symptom score', ranging from 1-10. 1 is essential 'normal', 10 is maximum suffering from symptoms (which I haven't recorded yet). I have attached this chart below.


Recently I have been in a bigger wave with a new symptom: muscle weakness/muscle pain. This is occurring all over my body, especially in my chest, arms and legs. I had an event ~ a week ago where all of my muscles contracted/shook for 15min, like an insane form of the chills (but was not cold). Performing simple exercise results in a cramp feeling at the respective muscle. For context, I have been able to exercise intensely throughout withdrawal with little to no noticeable impact.

 

I have gotten blood tests to rule anything else out but am still concerned this may be something else. Does anyone else have a similar experience of symptoms? Does this sound like WD? Any advice would be appreciated.

 

 

Thank you

Screen Shot 2022-06-09 at 4.07.57 PM.png

Started Lexapro on 10/20/2020 at 10mg.

 

CT quit Lexapro on 3/04/2021.

 

Acute withdrawal hit almost immediately. Windows/wave pattern ever since.

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@Seer

Great to read, congratulations on your significant improvements! 

Thank you for posting your update. 

 

6 minutes ago, Seer said:

Recently I have been in a bigger wave with a new symptom: muscle weakness/muscle pain. This is occurring all over my body, especially in my chest, arms and legs. I had an event ~ a week ago where all of my muscles contracted/shook for 15min, like an insane form of the chills (but was not cold).

 

Is there any chance you may have had a virus recently or might currently have a virus? 

Did anything unusual precede the event you describe? Did you eat, drink, ingest, do anything unusual in the days/hours prior to the event?

1996-2018 - misc. polypharmacy, incl. SSRIs, SNRIs, neuroleptics, lithium, benzos, stimulants, antihistamines, etc. (approx. 30+ drugs)

2012-2018 - 10mg lexapro/escitalopram (20mg?)    Jan. 2018 - 10mg -> 5mg, then from 5mg -> 2.5mg, then 0mg  -->  July 2018 - 0mg

2017(?)-2020 - vyvanse/lisdexamfetamine 60-70mg    2020-2021 - 70mg down to 0mg  -->  July 2021 - 0mg

March-April 2021 - vortioxetine 5-10mg (approx. 7 weeks total; CT)  -->  April 28th, 2021 - 0mg

supplements: magnesium powder (dissolved in water) as needed throughout the day; 1 tsp fish oil w/ morning meal; 2mg melatonin 

August 1, 2022 - 1 mg melatonin

 

Courage is fear that has said its prayers.  - Karle Wilson Baker

love and justice are not two. without inner change, there can be no outer change; without collective change, no change matters.  - Rev. angel Kyodo williams

Holding multiple truths. Knowing that everyone has their own accurate view of the way things are.  - text on homemade banner at Afiya house

 

I am not a medical professional; this is not medical advice. 

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1996-2018 - misc. polypharmacy, incl. SSRIs, SNRIs, neuroleptics, lithium, benzos, stimulants, antihistamines, etc. (approx. 30+ drugs)

2012-2018 - 10mg lexapro/escitalopram (20mg?)    Jan. 2018 - 10mg -> 5mg, then from 5mg -> 2.5mg, then 0mg  -->  July 2018 - 0mg

2017(?)-2020 - vyvanse/lisdexamfetamine 60-70mg    2020-2021 - 70mg down to 0mg  -->  July 2021 - 0mg

March-April 2021 - vortioxetine 5-10mg (approx. 7 weeks total; CT)  -->  April 28th, 2021 - 0mg

supplements: magnesium powder (dissolved in water) as needed throughout the day; 1 tsp fish oil w/ morning meal; 2mg melatonin 

August 1, 2022 - 1 mg melatonin

 

Courage is fear that has said its prayers.  - Karle Wilson Baker

love and justice are not two. without inner change, there can be no outer change; without collective change, no change matters.  - Rev. angel Kyodo williams

Holding multiple truths. Knowing that everyone has their own accurate view of the way things are.  - text on homemade banner at Afiya house

 

I am not a medical professional; this is not medical advice. 

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Hey @Ariel thanks for checking in!

 

8 minutes ago, Ariel said:

Is there any chance you may have had a virus recently or might currently have a virus? 

Did anything unusual precede the event you describe? Did you eat, drink, ingest, do anything unusual in the days/hours prior to the event?

The only difference, which now that I think of it is a significant one, is I travelled from the east coast -->CO, so a change in ~5000ft in elevation. The 'event' happened the night I got there. Think the altitude mixed with WD could have contributed?

 

I got blood test back today and WBC count is normal, and prior to this there is nothing significant that I can think of.

 

I will check out Asthenia's thread now. Thank you!

Started Lexapro on 10/20/2020 at 10mg.

 

CT quit Lexapro on 3/04/2021.

 

Acute withdrawal hit almost immediately. Windows/wave pattern ever since.

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After reviewing the below, it seems more likely than not to be WD related. Makes sense as I currently have numerous other symptoms in this wave. I will continue to monitor progress...

 

Started Lexapro on 10/20/2020 at 10mg.

 

CT quit Lexapro on 3/04/2021.

 

Acute withdrawal hit almost immediately. Windows/wave pattern ever since.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Many members report an increase in symptoms when they do something different, eg going on a holiday.

* NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA *

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED:  (6 year taper)      0mg Pristiq  on 13th November 2021

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021   LAST DOSE 0.0025mg

Post 0 updates start here    My tapering program     My Intro (goes to tapering graph)

 VIDEO:   Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management

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Update:

 

Week 67:

 

The symptoms from above have cleared, here comes a window :) 

 

- Seer

 

Started Lexapro on 10/20/2020 at 10mg.

 

CT quit Lexapro on 3/04/2021.

 

Acute withdrawal hit almost immediately. Windows/wave pattern ever since.

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I'm in month 3 of WD CT from.2.5 mg of Lexapro. And to be honest, I'm in a really bad wave. 

 

Depression is high on the list.... fatigue...orthostatic issues and the sense of depersonalization to dread. Changes in temperature to just not feeling anything and being comatose most days since.

 

Thank you for posting your Lexapro journey...it makes me feel less alone and hopefully I will have better days ahead. I'm just overly tired and exhausted. 

 

This too shall pass. But today I just feel zonked.

Started Prozac 2013- No progress

Started Lexapro early 2014 (10MG), added Trazodone in 2015 for sleeping issues

Was on this elixir for several years until 2019. Dropped Trazodone CT'ed at 150MG Due to muscle and bone pain

Dropped Lexapro in 2020 and started Effexor (stopped after 2 months because of suicidal thoughts and severe headaches)

Started Gabapentin in July 2020, took it for 7 weeks (made me lucid and not coherent). CT'ed off at 300 MG. 

Worst withdrawl ever. 

READDED LEX at 40 MG Sept 2020, tapered to 20 in three months then 10 in another 3 months and tapered off March 2022. 

 

Currently on no antidepressants as of March 2022. 

 

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Hey @farmley0223,

 

I can offer you some reassurance in that I experienced all of the symptoms you mentioned. For me, 3 months off was when I got hit really hard and it has gradually improved since then (windows, waves). The good news is that these symptoms will eventually lessen in intensity, until they disappear entirely. There are, without a doubt, better days ahead.

 

Indeed, this too shall pass my friend.

 

Feel free to dm me anytime,

 

- Seer

 

 

 

 

Started Lexapro on 10/20/2020 at 10mg.

 

CT quit Lexapro on 3/04/2021.

 

Acute withdrawal hit almost immediately. Windows/wave pattern ever since.

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Update 

 

Week 68.5:

 

I've felt significantly better across the board these past 10 days, minor issues. I feel a full recovery coming soon :)

 

- Seer

Started Lexapro on 10/20/2020 at 10mg.

 

CT quit Lexapro on 3/04/2021.

 

Acute withdrawal hit almost immediately. Windows/wave pattern ever since.

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Update

 

16 Months off:

 

Significant improvements have remained. I had an extremely busy holiday weekend, was able to fully socialize, have a few drinks, workout, play golf, and most importantly enjoy myself!

 

Future positive updates coming...

 

- Seer

Started Lexapro on 10/20/2020 at 10mg.

 

CT quit Lexapro on 3/04/2021.

 

Acute withdrawal hit almost immediately. Windows/wave pattern ever since.

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Update

 

Week 71:

 

The significant improvements have remained. Note small occurrences (1-3hrs) of symptoms returning, but disappearing completely.

 

For anyone reading this, my journey has not always been this positive. I've attached a picture below of the symptoms I experienced along the way. 

 

ALL of these have gone away completely at one point, with a few coming back in minor intensities nowadays.

 

Future positive updates coming...

 

- Seer

image.thumb.png.4aa9fe250e5b24c2a2393c88e459f03a.png

Started Lexapro on 10/20/2020 at 10mg.

 

CT quit Lexapro on 3/04/2021.

 

Acute withdrawal hit almost immediately. Windows/wave pattern ever since.

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@rebeccaannxo You will absolutely heal one day. That is the non-negotiable outcome of this process. Keep holding on, moving forward one step at a time and improvements will come!! 

Started Lexapro on 10/20/2020 at 10mg.

 

CT quit Lexapro on 3/04/2021.

 

Acute withdrawal hit almost immediately. Windows/wave pattern ever since.

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I would like to share another positive update:

 

Week 72:

 

Today marks the 34th day in a row of feeling significantly better. I can feel my mind and body functioning on a much smoother, coherent level. My cognition has drastically increased, to a point where I believe I am better than I was prior to any drugs. I am exercising 6 days a week, socializing, golfing, reading, writing, working, and most of all enjoying life!!! Something I never thought would happen - my sleep has continued to improve and I am feeling rested upon waking. I feel more connected to people, nature, and myself. 

 

A principle that I apply to every day life is this:

 

                        It is not about what happens to you, it's about how you respond to what happens. Control what you can control.

 

The best place to approach any situation (especially withdrawal) is in between the past and the future: the present moment. Train your mind to focus on the task at hand, the present, take it one step at a time and before you know it you'll have walked 100 miles.

 

Below I've shown the same chart from above, updated to reflect the recent weeks.

 

- Seer

 

 

688807166_ScreenShot2022-07-18at10_32_40AM.thumb.png.600c802b6cc00358f6fbea67a7a188d9.png

Started Lexapro on 10/20/2020 at 10mg.

 

CT quit Lexapro on 3/04/2021.

 

Acute withdrawal hit almost immediately. Windows/wave pattern ever since.

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Hi @Seer

Wow, thank you so much for sharing this amazing, positive update!

Very generous of you to post on your progress. It's encouraging and uplifting to read. 

Congratulations on your remarkable improvements! 

Wishing you continued healing, and well done on how far you've come.

 

1996-2018 - misc. polypharmacy, incl. SSRIs, SNRIs, neuroleptics, lithium, benzos, stimulants, antihistamines, etc. (approx. 30+ drugs)

2012-2018 - 10mg lexapro/escitalopram (20mg?)    Jan. 2018 - 10mg -> 5mg, then from 5mg -> 2.5mg, then 0mg  -->  July 2018 - 0mg

2017(?)-2020 - vyvanse/lisdexamfetamine 60-70mg    2020-2021 - 70mg down to 0mg  -->  July 2021 - 0mg

March-April 2021 - vortioxetine 5-10mg (approx. 7 weeks total; CT)  -->  April 28th, 2021 - 0mg

supplements: magnesium powder (dissolved in water) as needed throughout the day; 1 tsp fish oil w/ morning meal; 2mg melatonin 

August 1, 2022 - 1 mg melatonin

 

Courage is fear that has said its prayers.  - Karle Wilson Baker

love and justice are not two. without inner change, there can be no outer change; without collective change, no change matters.  - Rev. angel Kyodo williams

Holding multiple truths. Knowing that everyone has their own accurate view of the way things are.  - text on homemade banner at Afiya house

 

I am not a medical professional; this is not medical advice. 

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Hey @Ariel,

 

Thank you for the encouragement!

 

I noticed you dropping notes of positivity, hope and healing on many members' posts. That is no small feat, and the impact you are making on people is tremendous. Thank you for spreading the light that you do!

 

I wish you continued healing along your journey.

 

- Seer

Started Lexapro on 10/20/2020 at 10mg.

 

CT quit Lexapro on 3/04/2021.

 

Acute withdrawal hit almost immediately. Windows/wave pattern ever since.

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Thank you for your kind words @Seer

We're in this together <3

1996-2018 - misc. polypharmacy, incl. SSRIs, SNRIs, neuroleptics, lithium, benzos, stimulants, antihistamines, etc. (approx. 30+ drugs)

2012-2018 - 10mg lexapro/escitalopram (20mg?)    Jan. 2018 - 10mg -> 5mg, then from 5mg -> 2.5mg, then 0mg  -->  July 2018 - 0mg

2017(?)-2020 - vyvanse/lisdexamfetamine 60-70mg    2020-2021 - 70mg down to 0mg  -->  July 2021 - 0mg

March-April 2021 - vortioxetine 5-10mg (approx. 7 weeks total; CT)  -->  April 28th, 2021 - 0mg

supplements: magnesium powder (dissolved in water) as needed throughout the day; 1 tsp fish oil w/ morning meal; 2mg melatonin 

August 1, 2022 - 1 mg melatonin

 

Courage is fear that has said its prayers.  - Karle Wilson Baker

love and justice are not two. without inner change, there can be no outer change; without collective change, no change matters.  - Rev. angel Kyodo williams

Holding multiple truths. Knowing that everyone has their own accurate view of the way things are.  - text on homemade banner at Afiya house

 

I am not a medical professional; this is not medical advice. 

Link to comment
9 hours ago, Seer said:

 

 

688807166_ScreenShot2022-07-18at10_32_40AM.thumb.png.600c802b6cc00358f6fbea67a7a188d9.png

You encouraged me a lot, thank you and I am very very happy that you are cured 😌 I just want to ask you how I can get this chart I want to write down all the observations and symptoms that I go through daily and thank you

I don't speak English fluently but I speak to you with google translator

2005-2006:Diversity in taking medications
 2006-2019 Seroxat 20 mg
 2020-2021 Cipralex 15 mg
 Mar 2021 it has decreased from 15 mg to 12.5 mg/Aug 2021 9mg/Sep 12, 2021 8mg/Oct 12, 2021 7mg / Nov 12, 2021 6mg / Dec 12, 2021 5mg / Jan 12, 2022 4.5mg /Feb 12, 2022 4mg/Mar-Apr 3.5mg/May 3mg The beginning of severe withdrawal

/sep 23, 2022 2.5mg

On March 19, 2023, I ended up in the emergency room, with severe palpitations, panic, and severe mental and physical fatigue, then I went back to a dose of 20 milligrams of Seroxat to this day.

 

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On 7/18/2022 at 10:46 AM, Seer said:

I would like to share another positive update:

 

Week 72:

 

Today marks the 34th day in a row of feeling significantly better. I can feel my mind and body functioning on a much smoother, coherent level. My cognition has drastically increased, to a point where I believe I am better than I was prior to any drugs. I am exercising 6 days a week, socializing, golfing, reading, writing, working, and most of all enjoying life!!! Something I never thought would happen - my sleep has continued to improve and I am feeling rested upon waking. I feel more connected to people, nature, and myself. 

 

A principle that I apply to every day life is this:

 

                        It is not about what happens to you, it's about how you respond to what happens. Control what you can control.

 

The best place to approach any situation (especially withdrawal) is in between the past and the future: the present moment. Train your mind to focus on the task at hand, the present, take it one step at a time and before you know it you'll have walked 100 miles.

 

Below I've shown the same chart from above, updated to reflect the recent weeks.

 

- Seer

 

 

688807166_ScreenShot2022-07-18at10_32_40AM.thumb.png.600c802b6cc00358f6fbea67a7a188d9.png

 

I love this chart Seer, especially the right part of it. Thank you for posting your observations, they may save lives! I am having a bad wave today and getting much needed hopeful vibes!

 

Lexapro started 2006, 10 mg 2007 tapered to 0 over a month. Felt poorly, got wd but did not know

2008  Put back on L, 20 mg 

2015-16 tapered to 0 over several months. Severe Discontinuation symptoms several days after.

2016: 20 mg, 2016-April 2018 slow taper to 0. 

2018 April: Drug - free!!! June: Withdrawal started 🤯 July: Back on Escitalopram, 10 mg, Nov: 15 mg,

2019: Feb 15 13.75 mg, Feb 23 updose to 15 mg, Sep 6  13.75 mg, Sep 16 12.5 mg, Oct 5 11.25 mg, Oct 23 updose 12 mg

2020: Jan 13 11.5 mg Jan 16 updose 11.9 mg, Feb-Dec  slowly tapered from 11.6 to 6.6 mg. 

2021: Oct 5 mg

2022: Jul 3.8 mg

Holding due to bad symptoms of tiredness, brain fog, depression. 

Bupropion trial sep- nov 2019 no relief from wd. 100, 150, 100, 75, 50, 0 mg

Testosterone Aug 2019-April 2021 - injections, stopped abruptly, experienced wd from T discontinuation . Nov 2021 - current - topical. Massive wave from T re-introduction

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Hey @Mutfael, I am happy that my journey has provided some encouragement!!

 

I see we both walk the same path of withdrawal, keep going my friend, your healing is coming!! One step at a time.

 

I have attached a template version of the chart I use. The W/W column will populate "Window" or "Wave" based on your score for that day. I set window at 1-4 and wave at 5-10.

 

Symptom Tracker Template.xlsx

 

Started Lexapro on 10/20/2020 at 10mg.

 

CT quit Lexapro on 3/04/2021.

 

Acute withdrawal hit almost immediately. Windows/wave pattern ever since.

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Hey @LeoD, thanks for stopping by!

 

I am sorry to hear you're in a bad wave, unfortunately I have been there as well. I encourage you to keep moving forward, one day, one hour, one minute at a time. This wave will end!

 

The good news is, every one of my bad waves has been followed by a wonderful window, and with an improved baseline!!

 

You will fully heal, your future self is already enjoying life again :)

Started Lexapro on 10/20/2020 at 10mg.

 

CT quit Lexapro on 3/04/2021.

 

Acute withdrawal hit almost immediately. Windows/wave pattern ever since.

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3 minutes ago, Seer said:

Hey @LeoD, thanks for stopping by!

 

I am sorry to hear you're in a bad wave, unfortunately I have been there as well. I encourage you to keep moving forward, one day, one hour, one minute at a time. This wave will end!

 

The good news is, every one of my bad waves has been followed by a wonderful window, and with an improved baseline!!

 

You will fully heal, your future self is already enjoying life again :)

Thanks Seer! Unfortunately this is my 4th taper and I still have 3.8 mg to go! I am determined to make it my last one, but the brain fog and depression are excruciating at this point, so looking for positive stories instead of working -:)).

 

Lexapro started 2006, 10 mg 2007 tapered to 0 over a month. Felt poorly, got wd but did not know

2008  Put back on L, 20 mg 

2015-16 tapered to 0 over several months. Severe Discontinuation symptoms several days after.

2016: 20 mg, 2016-April 2018 slow taper to 0. 

2018 April: Drug - free!!! June: Withdrawal started 🤯 July: Back on Escitalopram, 10 mg, Nov: 15 mg,

2019: Feb 15 13.75 mg, Feb 23 updose to 15 mg, Sep 6  13.75 mg, Sep 16 12.5 mg, Oct 5 11.25 mg, Oct 23 updose 12 mg

2020: Jan 13 11.5 mg Jan 16 updose 11.9 mg, Feb-Dec  slowly tapered from 11.6 to 6.6 mg. 

2021: Oct 5 mg

2022: Jul 3.8 mg

Holding due to bad symptoms of tiredness, brain fog, depression. 

Bupropion trial sep- nov 2019 no relief from wd. 100, 150, 100, 75, 50, 0 mg

Testosterone Aug 2019-April 2021 - injections, stopped abruptly, experienced wd from T discontinuation . Nov 2021 - current - topical. Massive wave from T re-introduction

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  • 1 month later...

18 Months off:

 

I feel basically healed. Normal ~90-95% of the time, few symptoms pop up here and there. Will be back to write a success story in the future.

 

Until then..... best wishes to everyone!!

 

- Seer

Started Lexapro on 10/20/2020 at 10mg.

 

CT quit Lexapro on 3/04/2021.

 

Acute withdrawal hit almost immediately. Windows/wave pattern ever since.

Link to comment
On 7/12/2022 at 9:51 AM, Seer said:

Update

 

Week 71:

 

The significant improvements have remained. Note small occurrences (1-3hrs) of symptoms returning, but disappearing completely.

 

For anyone reading this, my journey has not always been this positive. I've attached a picture below of the symptoms I experienced along the way. 

 

ALL of these have gone away completely at one point, with a few coming back in minor intensities nowadays.

 

Future positive updates coming...

 

- Seer

image.thumb.png.4aa9fe250e5b24c2a2393c88e459f03a.png

Glad you are getting better. Your posts give hope to others going through the process. I found this symptom list to be very helpful. I have experienced most of it coming down off of Seroquel and seeing this list from this point forward will help to remind me that it's just withdrawal and it will pass.

Current Psychiatric Medications

  1. Paxil 10mg daily (a.m.) 2017 - Present
  2. Carbamazepine IR  190 mg twice daily (380mg Daily) 2011 - Present (Currently Tapering)

Past Psychiatric Medications From 1994 to August 2021   Seroquel (in Recovery since August 2021 final dose 6.25mg), Depakote, Lithium, Risperidone, Xanax, Lamotrigene, Olanzapine, Lorazepam, Welbutrin, Trazodone, Oxazepam, Gabapentin, Abilify, Topiramate, Prazosin, Ambien (See Attached Spreadsheet And Seroquel Tapering And WIthdrawal Summary)

Current Non Psychiatric Medications Levothyroxine 88mcg (a.m.)-Vitamin D3 1000 IU (p.m.)-Fexofenadine 180 mg twice daily -Clonidine 0.1 mg (p.m.)-Azelastine Nasal Spray

Other - Fish Oil Twice Daily-Multi-Vitamin (a.m.)-Vitamin C 1000mg Daily (a.m.)-Saline Nasal Spray-Salsalate 750mg twice daily PRN, Diclofenac Gel on affected joint PRN-Magnesium Citrate 250mg twice daily, Betaine HCL & Digestine Enzymes With Meals

Quitting Seroquel_A Vacation In Hell_Redacted.pdf

Other Documents https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/26099-feralcatman-recovering-from-seroquel/?do=findComment&comment=633907

 

 

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  • 3 weeks later...

@Seer So glad I found your thread today, super encouraging :) Please do come back and write a success story 

Sept 2021 - CT sertraline 25mg. told it was a 'placebo dose', knew nothing about the dangers or mechanism of these drugs

Nov 2021 - Jan 2022 - failed reinstatement attempt which exacerbated symptoms as it gave me severe serotonin syndrome, unrecognised by doctors who told me to double my dose (!!!!). this was a very awful period, was still trying to work and go to uni, eventually had to quit everything & move back in with family. horrific 'altered reality' symptoms of dissociation, hallucinations, insomnia, chemical dread, racing heart, agitation, nausea, burning & more 

Jan 14th 2022 - 0mg SSRI

Currently, 2023: in recovery from drug-induced neurological dysfunction/PAWS. only meds- 10mg amitriptyline at night.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Hi @Seer, also wanted to say hi and thank you for sharing your journey. It truly does give one hope!

2017 Oct sertraline | Nov switched to escitalopram 10mg | 2018 Apr escitalopram fast taper (4-8 weeks) to zero/off

2018 Nov restarted escitalopram, increased to 20mg | 2020 Jan escitalopram fast taper (2-3 months) to zero/off

2020 Aug 27 restarted escitalopram 10mg tablet, came across SA.org

2021 Feb 27 complete switch to liquid 9.8mg | Mar 7 decreased to 9.5mg | Mar 14 decreased to 9.3mg | Mar 21 decreased to 9.0mg | Apr 11 decreased to 8.8mg | Apr 18 decreased to 8.6mg | May 9 decreased to 8.3mg | May 16 decreased to 8.1mg | Jun 6 increased to 9.0mg | July 18 decreased to 8.6mg | Aug 15 decreased to 8.2mg | Sept 19 decreased to 8.0mg | Oct 21 decreased to 7.6mg | Nov 18 decreased to 7.2mg | Dec 16 decreased to 6.9mg

2022 Feb 27 decreased to 6.8mg | Mar 31 decreased to 6.4mg | Jul 5 decreased to 6.1mg | Jul 23 decreased to 5.8mg | Aug 10 increased to 6.0mg | Nov 24 decreased to 5.4mg | Dec 31 decreased to 4.8mg

2023 Feb 1 decreased to 4.4mg | May 17 decreased to 4mg | Jul 6 decreased to 3.8mg | Jul 19 decreased to 3.6 | Aug 11 decreased to 3.2mg | Sept 9 decreased to 3.0mg | Sept 22 decreased to 2.7mg | Oct 24 increased to 2.775mg | Nov 12 decreased to 2.7mg | Dec 20 increased to 3.0mg

 

I hold for longer periods of time when life gets stressful, usually work related.

 

Supplements: currently none

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