Armorall Posted June 16, 2022 Author Share Posted June 16, 2022 @Lilly998 I would say not pushing yourself would be better. You want your nervous system to calm down. You do want to do gentle activities, you can't just rot in bed all day long as much as you'd like to. Going walking in a forest is ideal- it's the right amount of visual stimulation without the stress for the most part. Yes, my memory is like a hawk- everything came back. I'm a strong mother, activist and educator as I used to be. I never really got anhedonia though, so can't speak to that. 2 3/21/19 started Bupropion XL 150 mg 3/21/19 started Risperidone 2mg 7/7/19 start Abilify half dose 5 mg. discontinue Risperidone 7/9/19 full dose Abilify 10 mg 7/29/19 discontinued Abilify due to panicky side effects 8/2/19 Began Latuda 20 mg 8/5/19 discontinued Latuda due to similar side effects 8/10/19 discontinued Bupropion after realizing it was causing the insomnia From 8/10/19 no drugs whatsoever Currently taking vitamin C, D, E, a probiotic and fish oil. Message me here if you want: https://www.facebook.com/morra.lal.3/ I've been getting a lot of fake friend requests, so please send a message before friend requesting me, thank you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rmce72a Posted June 17, 2022 Share Posted June 17, 2022 Thank you for telling your story. I am in week 4 of my tapering Effexor XR 75 after 20 years. I have been more and more depressed over the last 2 1/2 years and now have GAD, so I know Effexor 75 isn't working. I have a sweet, kind GP who is clueless when it comes to AD. I came to him after my former doctor (who put me on Effexor) retired. I see a therapist too and they are both pushing me to try other ADs, but I don't want to get on the merry-go-round. Therapy is helping some, and I just want to be drug-free. I, too, get discouraged from reading the many physical problems people have even after they are off meds. It was refreshing and encouraging to read your story. Thank you. 1 Prozac 10mg 1990-1999 -1999-2018 Effexor XR 75 mg capsules -2018 Dr direct switched me from Effexor 75XR to Cymbalta 20mg XR and 20 mg Metoprolol following irregular heartbeat incident -Late 2019 began worsening anxiety/ depression symptoms -2020 Dr direct switched back to 75 mg Effex XR Symptoms worsened -2021 Changed Dr and began therapy for GAD and Worsening physical symptoms -2022 Found this forum and began slow taper by removing beads - 6/7 - 6/10 Effexor 73.2mg 6/11-6/14 Effexor 72.9mg nightmares, tinnitus, anxiety; 6/15- Effexor XR 72.6mg 6/16 - 6/20 Effexor XR 72.8 nausea, heart palpitations, anxiety, tinnitus 6/22-7/4 hold Effexor XR 72.9-73.1 7/5-7/11 Effexor XR 72.62 7/12 - 7/15 Effexor 72.6 bad symptoms 7/16-7/17 Effexor XR upped to 72.9 7/18 Effexor XR 72.9 most symptoms gone hold at 72.9 - 73.0 8/26 - 9/6 Trying to keep dosage under 73. Holding around 72.9 sometime 72.86 due to bead count Having symptoms most days. 9/6-9/23 Holding at about 72.9-73. Still very ill. No improvement. 9/23 - 11/23 Still keeping dose around 72.9-73 11-23-Jan 14 Held until one week ago. Dropped to 72.75-72.81 terrible WD 1/14- present Worse WD symptoms. Back to 73.10. Cannot seem to stabilize. 2/2 - present Holding at about 73 hoping to stabilize 1/24 Updose to 73-73.2. Take only Clarinex 5mg for allergies and the Effexor 73 XR. I cannot take any supplements. No caffeine, sugar, soy, gluten, dairy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quittingquentiapin Posted August 18, 2022 Share Posted August 18, 2022 On 6/16/2022 at 3:08 PM, Armorall said: @Lilly998 I would say not pushing yourself would be better. You want your nervous system to calm down. You do want to do gentle activities, you can't just rot in bed all day long as much as you'd like to. Going walking in a forest is ideal- it's the right amount of visual stimulation without the stress for the most part. Yes, my memory is like a hawk- everything came back. I'm a strong mother, activist and educator as I used to be. I never really got anhedonia though, so can't speak to that. I read that your memory return. I have the feelingvthatbi develop dementia. And I only remember bad things about me. Will this pass? I don’t remember everything but I tray 2019 3-4 months citalopram (tiered from medication 2019 3-4 month Escitalopram (same as citalopram) 2019-03/2020 Effexor ( CT because I was psychotic on this medication ) 08/2020 Risperdal 4mg 1 week than taper to 2Mg 09/2020 1mg Risperdal + Effexor 37,5 till April CT in Psyward by the doctors April 2021 relapse and get 20 mg Abilify ( i think it was WD not relapse) May 2021 CT Abilify Hospital : try a lot of Medication Medication Sep2021: 150 mg sertralin and 50mg Quentiapin tapered in hospital 3 month 0 mg sertralin and 50 mg quentiapin March 2022 CT Quentiapin Current medication 0 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Armorall Posted August 31, 2022 Author Share Posted August 31, 2022 @Lilly998 All of that will pass. You probably are only remembering bad things about yourself because your anxiety is very high at times. Do not worry. It will pass and you will heal. Remember that the more confidence you have in your own healing, the easier it will be to withstand the hard parts of your journey. You will heal. 1 3/21/19 started Bupropion XL 150 mg 3/21/19 started Risperidone 2mg 7/7/19 start Abilify half dose 5 mg. discontinue Risperidone 7/9/19 full dose Abilify 10 mg 7/29/19 discontinued Abilify due to panicky side effects 8/2/19 Began Latuda 20 mg 8/5/19 discontinued Latuda due to similar side effects 8/10/19 discontinued Bupropion after realizing it was causing the insomnia From 8/10/19 no drugs whatsoever Currently taking vitamin C, D, E, a probiotic and fish oil. Message me here if you want: https://www.facebook.com/morra.lal.3/ I've been getting a lot of fake friend requests, so please send a message before friend requesting me, thank you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Armorall Posted October 23, 2022 Author Share Posted October 23, 2022 @rmce72a sorry I somehow didn't see your message before. You will heal. I am glad my story helps you. I know people need confidence in their future healing as I so often did. So I'm here to tell you you will heal. @Quittingquentiapin I'm so sorry, I somehow responded to the wrong person before instead of you. Here is my response to you: All of that will pass. You probably are only remembering bad things about yourself because your anxiety is very high at times. Do not worry. It will pass and you will heal. Remember that the more confidence you have in your own healing, the easier it will be to withstand the hard parts of your journey. You will heal. Best wishes to the both of you ❤️ 1 3/21/19 started Bupropion XL 150 mg 3/21/19 started Risperidone 2mg 7/7/19 start Abilify half dose 5 mg. discontinue Risperidone 7/9/19 full dose Abilify 10 mg 7/29/19 discontinued Abilify due to panicky side effects 8/2/19 Began Latuda 20 mg 8/5/19 discontinued Latuda due to similar side effects 8/10/19 discontinued Bupropion after realizing it was causing the insomnia From 8/10/19 no drugs whatsoever Currently taking vitamin C, D, E, a probiotic and fish oil. Message me here if you want: https://www.facebook.com/morra.lal.3/ I've been getting a lot of fake friend requests, so please send a message before friend requesting me, thank you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mentor DaBro Posted October 23, 2022 Mentor Share Posted October 23, 2022 On 8/18/2022 at 8:30 PM, Quittingquentiapin said: I read that your memory return. I have the feelingvthatbi develop dementia. And I only remember bad things about me. Will this pass? I had many flashbacks @Quittingquentiapin They took me back to my childhood and 20’s a lot. I went through a lot of self criticism. After a while my windows and waves became more predictable and I noticed that flashbacks always came at the same point in a wave. I believe that the waves are the time our brains heal. Windows become better and longer after each wave. so waves are part of healing and old memories are part of waves. You are not getting dementia, you are actually healing now you are free of the meds. try not to criticise yourself or re-live the memories. See them for what they are - just thoughts. take care. 2 50 mg Sertraline Nov 2016 to Dec 2016 100 mg Sertraline Jan - March 2017 50 mg Sertraline April - June 2017 25 mg Sertraline July 2017 - Sept 2018 12.5 mg Sertraline Oct 2018 0 mg Nov 1 2018 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thorin Posted October 23, 2022 Share Posted October 23, 2022 So good to read these success stories. Sometimes they’re all that keeps me going. I admit I obsessively read peoples signatures and feel hope every time I read one where someone’s successfully recovered. I hope I get there too one day. There seem to be so many challenges between here and the point where I’m off meds and ok again. It’s terrifying at times! 2 Age 16 (1995 - 2000) -Paroxetine Age 21 (2000-2004) - Effexor 37.5mg Age 24 (2004-2012) - Lexapro (70mg), Xanax minimum 2mg Xanax a day About 32 (2012-2017?) - Every mood stabiliser under the sun (not at the same time) and minimum 2mg Xanax a day; occasional amisulpride About 35 (2017-current) - Lurasidone 80 mg, quickly titrated down to 40mg, Pristiq (50 mg), minimum of 2mg Xanax a day About 41 (2020) Switched from Xanax to clonazepam and started tapering at 0.125 mg each reduction, tapered off Pristiq with a cross taper at the end, low dose of dextroamphetamine. Age 42 (2021) Tried to taper off Lurasidone three times. Quick taper from 40mg to 0 mg over a couple of months the first time. Reinstated at 20mg. Tried twice more to taper from 20 mg to 0 mg dropping by 5 mg each reduction (about every 2 weeks). Age 42-43 (April 2022) 20mg-18mg; May 18mg-16mg; June 16-14mg; September 14-12mg; September 12-14mg reinstated. September 2022 Lurasidone just reinstated from 12mg back to 14 mg. February 2023 - hiccup with brand change, Back to Apotek brand and switch to homemade suspension. Occasional CBD oil; nightly CBD:low dose THC oil. Health regimen: walks, hot/cold showers, ice baths, breathwork, mostly healthy diet, therapy...... Open to ideas! Supplements: Milk Kefir, Mag, Omega 3, glycine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Armorall Posted October 24, 2022 Author Share Posted October 24, 2022 @Thorin you will heal, there is no doubt about that. You are doing great. 1 3/21/19 started Bupropion XL 150 mg 3/21/19 started Risperidone 2mg 7/7/19 start Abilify half dose 5 mg. discontinue Risperidone 7/9/19 full dose Abilify 10 mg 7/29/19 discontinued Abilify due to panicky side effects 8/2/19 Began Latuda 20 mg 8/5/19 discontinued Latuda due to similar side effects 8/10/19 discontinued Bupropion after realizing it was causing the insomnia From 8/10/19 no drugs whatsoever Currently taking vitamin C, D, E, a probiotic and fish oil. Message me here if you want: https://www.facebook.com/morra.lal.3/ I've been getting a lot of fake friend requests, so please send a message before friend requesting me, thank you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
conkaia Posted October 24, 2022 Share Posted October 24, 2022 On 10/23/2022 at 7:50 AM, DaBro said: I had many flashbacks @Quittingquentiapin They took me back to my childhood and 20’s a lot. I went through a lot of self criticism. After a while my windows and waves became more predictable and I noticed that flashbacks always came at the same point in a wave. I believe that the waves are the time our brains heal. Windows become better and longer after each wave. so waves are part of healing and old memories are part of waves. You are not getting dementia, you are actually healing now you are free of the meds. try not to criticise yourself or re-live the memories. See them for what they are - just thoughts. take care. Thanks for this. I'm really struggling with flashbacks, intrusive memories and intrusive thoughts right now. Your post is very reassuring. 1 August 2004: Citalopram 20mg for "postnatal anxiety". May-Sept 2011: Adverse reaction to the contraceptive pill, causing severe anxiety and panic. Was switched from 7 years on Citalopram to Lofepramine briefly, then Mirtazapine 30mg. Was an anxious, depressed, suicidal wreck and got misdiagnosed with GAD by a psychiatrist. I now realise my symptoms were all medication related, as opposed to so-called psychiatric diagnosis. October 2011: Pregabalin 450mg and propranolol 40mg TID added by psychiatrist. Feb 2013: Tapered off pregabalin 450mg; stopped propranolol. July 2013: Switched from Mirtazapine 30mg to Cipralex 10mg in a two-week cross titration, which caused horrific withdrawal symptoms lasting months. April 2015: Increased to 15mg Cipralex. 2017: Was treated by a clinical psychologist for medication-related trauma and slowly tapered down to 2mg Cipralex over the next four years. December 2021: Switched from Cipralex tablets to drops to facilitate further tapering; this caused withdrawal reaction lasting approx 6 weeks. May 2022: Experienced severe withdrawal reaction after inadvertently taking expired drops. 3rd June 2022: Reinstated 2mg Cipralex drops. Stabilisation hindered by drinking alcohol socially; didn't realise impact of this. Nil alcohol since September 2022. Supplements: Cycling Magnesium, Omega 3, Evening Primrose, Vitamin D3, Vitamin C, Vitamin B Complex, Zinc, Ashwagandha, Sage. Had been taking these prior to withdrawal incident. Feb 2023: Relatively stable and aiming to hold on 2mg Cipralex and with a view to tapering down in 2024. Tapering off Ashwagandha. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Armorall Posted Sunday at 06:40 PM Author Share Posted Sunday at 06:40 PM Welp, just wanted to post an update. It has been 4 years since I was hospitalized and coaxed into taking the AD cocktail that disabled me for some time. I'm doing extremely well and doing all the things that I used to do- teaching in person, going to shows and going out dancing, exercising as much as I want and doing activism and being a parent and a wife. I continue to not be able to drink coffee or sugary drinks, but I think that that is a benefit now that I am in perimenopause and feeling the signs of aging. In retrospect, coffee didn't really help me perform very well. I wake up refreshed every morning from sleep and don't get as irritable or tired through the day. I've taken on intermittent fasting to help with those things too and I'm glad that my nervous system can handle it. I got some anxiety the first few days of only eating 5-6 hours a day, but that resolved itself after a week at most. I still want to do some activism around ADs, there's just so much going on right now. Just a reminder if you are reading this and in WD, you will heal. If you need someone to remind you that you will heal when you're feeling down, please send a message to my FB account and I can remind you when you need it, provided it isn't several times a week. I wish you all the best and thank you for reading. 4 3/21/19 started Bupropion XL 150 mg 3/21/19 started Risperidone 2mg 7/7/19 start Abilify half dose 5 mg. discontinue Risperidone 7/9/19 full dose Abilify 10 mg 7/29/19 discontinued Abilify due to panicky side effects 8/2/19 Began Latuda 20 mg 8/5/19 discontinued Latuda due to similar side effects 8/10/19 discontinued Bupropion after realizing it was causing the insomnia From 8/10/19 no drugs whatsoever Currently taking vitamin C, D, E, a probiotic and fish oil. Message me here if you want: https://www.facebook.com/morra.lal.3/ I've been getting a lot of fake friend requests, so please send a message before friend requesting me, thank you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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