Sofa: Mirtazapine CT withdrawal getting worse. Reinstatement? Need help!

[Altostrata]

On 3/17/2022 at 9:22 PM, Altostrata said:

What exactly has your drug schedule been over the last week? Does zopiclone help you sleep? If it does, why do you want to stop it?

 

[Sofa]

@Altostrata

 

Took zopiclone 7.5 mg for 14 days, including small taper. Quit because sadly it was not working so well the last days. Did not sleep even when taking it. I seem to hit tolerance fast.

 

Took one valium yesterday because of really bad akathisia and a panic attack that lasted nearly the whole day.

[Altostrata]

When did you quit zopiclone?

 

Please update your signature.

[Sofa]

@Altostrata

Updated my signature now. Quit zopiclone 19. march

[ChessieCat]

Q:  What dose of Valium did you take?

 

Q:  What time did you take the Valium?

[Sofa]

@ChessieCat

Took 5 mg of valium at 9 pm g.m.t. yesterday 

It calmed down my panic and helped a little on the akathisia. It helped a lot on my head pressure and weirdly made the brain for less intense. The effect lasted 2-3 hours

[Sofa]

@ChessieCat @Altostrata

 

I am sorry, but i think i really need some help/advice.

 

My condition is getting worse, and very fast. I am bedbound, and struggle to comprehend small things and tasks. My cognition and dp/dr is really bad. Sound, vision, everything is distorted. I struggle to read and watch tv. I have to wiggle all the time because of the akathisia and i can never relax, and have panic attack lasting hours. I am exhausted already. I find it hard to eat and drink, and because of the akathisa i cant sleep. My mind is shutting more off, and i feel like the whole of me is dead already. All thought and personality gone. 
 

I no longer live hour by hour, or minute by minute. I live second by second in total mental agony and extreme physical restlessness. The suicidale thought are really scaring me, and because i struggle with feeling and expressing emotions, self harm is the only way to try to get out frustration. I feel so hollow and its just unbearable. 
 

Any suggestions as to what i can do to get through this? I have tried reading on the forum, but so much information and so little brain capacity. Writing this took a while. I struggle to hold on and see the hope.

[Altostrata]

What is your Valium schedule now?

[Sofa]

@Altostrata

I only took that one benzo. I try to stay away since i dont know for sure if my symptoms are caused by the Remeron this christmas or the benzos i took from july-october last year

[Altostrata]

Why did you not continue Valium, even at 2.5mg or a 1.25mg (a quarter of a tablet)?

 

Do you recall this:

On 3/12/2022 at 11:08 AM, Altostrata said:

You may also have withdrawal from going off Valium. It seems to me if you reinstate anything, it would be a low dose of Valium. It will also help you sleep. Sleep is important.

 

We would help you taper off later.

 

[Sofa]

@Altostrata @ChessieCat I was scared to because i was insure of wether my symptoms are Remeron withdrawal or benzowithdrawal. The valium is the first benzo i have taken since october last year, and i am afraid i might have a kindling effect if i reinstate and taper again. Have already done this once last year since i got bad akathisia first time i tried coming off the benzos.

[Sofa]

@Altostrata Is it normal for symptoms that have gone away to come back? I feel like my symptoms have progressed. Could this be a reversal process? The symptoms going backwards? Or is that just stupid?

 

I also had some days with less anxiety and was able to function a little more. But now I suddenly got way more anxiety, and the strain in the back of my head is back together with dizziness when i try to focus my eyes. 
 

My mind also feels more blank, which is scary!

[Sofa]

Is it normal for things to keep getting worse 3 months out? 
 

And i think i just got an akathisa attack. My restlessness suddenly got way worse, i cant stop wiggling my upper body. My head pressure got way worse. My anxiety and unease is really increased. 

[LostPhil]

Hi Sofa. I’ve been suffering Akathisia from mirt too, pacing my flat a lot so trying to get off it. How are you now?

[Sofa]

@LostPhil

 

Hi, my akathisia is pretty bad, but sometimes it reaches another level. Still waiting for it to go away three months out

[Altostrata]

It's typical for withdrawal symptoms to fluctuate. See 

 

The Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

 

What is withdrawal syndrome? 

 

Dr. Joseph Glenmullen's withdrawal symptom checklist

 

Dysautonomia (autonomic dysregulation)

 

and other discussions of symptoms in the Symptoms and Self-Care forum.

[Sofa]

@Altostrata @ChessieCat

 

Tried to take valium at low dosage, and now my akathisa is really bad! I cant sit still and i cant sleep. I am really tired. 
 

What should i do? Afraid i ***** up!

 

Is it possible to try some propranolol/beta blocker? Or will that just make it worse?

[Sofa]

Updated symptom list:

 

- No emotions or interests/emotional anesthesia 

- Anhedonia

- Loss of personality

- No emotional reaction to memories 

- Blank mind/no visualization or daydreaming, flow of thoughts 

- PGAD and PSSD

- Pressure in head (forehead and back of the head) that gets worse when i try to think, cry or daydream

- Tingling/itchy sensation in the back of my head and forehead when trying to think too much

- Cognitive issues and memory issues (cant do simple word gaims anymore)

- Brain fog (feels like my whole head is under water and constant cotton/brick feeling in head) 

- Unable to read or watch tv (lack of focus, cognitive abilities and bad vision)

- DP/DR (little bit better, but still total disconnect from my body)

- No concept of time 

- Akathisia (gotten so much worse - can hardly function)

- Tightness in chest 

- Extreme air hunger 

- Muscle pain and twitches 

- Tinnitus 

- Dizziness

- Insomnia 

- Bad and distorted vision and hearing 

- Reduced sense of smell

- Reduced sense of pain 

- Poor temperture regulation 

- Dry mouth and eyes

- Intense feeling of hopelessness and dread/doom (gets worse when thinking about how i used to be)

- Anxiety and panic 

- Monophobia and agarophobia 

- No appetite or thirst

- Panic when watching tv or social media (reaction i think because i feel nothing good and because i think of How my life could have been, and How everyone else have normal lives - really anything normal makes me panic)

 

New symptoms come all the time the time and old symptoms worsen, but still have some hope i will stabilize soon and start to get better. This cannot continue to get worse forever.

Last week i had hope. I managed to see friends and go hiking outside. Now i am hospitalized because my symptoms worsened so badly during the weekend that i feared i could not go on another minute because of the akathisia and extreme anxiety and hopelessness. It really changes so fast i am learning. Today i live second by second. In a month i hope to at least live hour by hour.

[LostPhil]

That sounds so tough Sofa. Hospital sounds the best place for you to be at the moment. Hope you feel a bit better soon. 

[christianjw12]

On 4/1/2022 at 9:05 PM, Sofa said:

Is it normal for things to keep getting worse 3 months out? 
 

And i think i just got an akathisa attack. My restlessness suddenly got way worse, i cant stop wiggling my upper body. My head pressure got way worse. My anxiety and unease is really increased. 

 

Hi @Sofa,

feeling bad after 3 months off antidepressants is common. I stopped Lexapro and the first 6-9 months were hard but it varies day to day. For some periods, I felt very depressed and so hopeless about my situation that what I wanted was to close my eyes and sleep until I wake up and feel recovered. Learn more about acceptance, it means to accept your symptoms as part of your recovery pattern. Most of us in this forum probably eventually recovered after all but it took a lot of times (we are talking about years, and not months). I'm currently at my 24 months off Lexapro and I'm not recovered yet but I'm functional, I still have some symptoms but they come and go. When they are here, just notice them, they are very bothering but when you accept them, you'll feel better compared to the case you reject them. When you reject them and they don't go away, you'll just feel worse.

[Altostrata]

On 4/3/2022 at 7:34 PM, Sofa said:

Tried to take valium at low dosage, and now my akathisa is really bad! I cant sit still and i cant sleep. I am really tired. 

 

If your akathisia got worse when you took Valium, don't take Valium.

 

I hope you find the treatment you seek in the hospital. If they prescribe you any drugs, please ask them how long you will need to take them and how will they help you to go off them.

[Sofa]

@Altostrata

Thank you for your reply.

 

I just wondered if you know if ginger is bad? The last two times i had a worsening, i had ginger ice tee in the same day? Do you think it controbuted? And do you think its possible to get better? The last two worsening episodes just feel so permanent. There is no fluctuation in those symptoms. 

 

I also took some paracetamol know for a headache, and not long after the akathisia  and my anxiety worsened. Could it be the paracetamol? I am really upset because the akathisia had started to lessen.

 

 

Edited April 6, 2022 by ChessieCat
Resized font

[ChessieCat]

There are many existing topics on SA.  You can use the site search function or an internet search engine and add site:survivingantidepressants.org to the search term.

 

herbal-teas-camomile-ginger-mint-etc-what-helps-you

 

This is the link to the site search for the word "ginger":

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/search/?q=ginger

[Sofa]

@Altostrata @ChessieCat

Is it normal for some symptoms to be constant and not change, and for others to fluctuate? Some of my symptoms are constant, and sometimes worsen, but never get better. While others fluctuate and can get better and worse.

[Ripley]

5 hours ago, Sofa said:

@Altostrata

Thank you for your reply.

 

I just wondered if you know if ginger is bad? The last two times i had a worsening, i had ginger ice tee in the same day? Do you think it controbuted? And do you think its possible to get better? The last two worsening episodes just feel so permanent. There is no fluctuation in those symptoms. 

 

I also took some paracetamol know for a headache, and not long after the akathisia  and my anxiety worsened. Could it be the paracetamol? I am really upset because the akathisia had started to lessen.

 

 

Hi @sofa

 

I also had a worsening of symptoms after I had ginger in a drink or food. I found it hard to believe at first and most discussions on here seemed to say it's generally soothing. 

 

However, I did find someone else who said the same thing and when I looked into it there are studies looking at how successfully ginger compares with diazapam in reducing anxiety. It's a medicinal plant and obviously has effects on the system so it's something I avoid.

 

Your system and symptoms will settle down with time and avoiding triggers. (I also avoid dark chocolate and obviously caffeine and alcohol and too much physical activity.)

 

I hope things improve for you soon.

[Altostrata]

On 4/3/2022 at 2:53 PM, Altostrata said:

It's typical for withdrawal symptoms to fluctuate. See 

 

The Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

 

What is withdrawal syndrome? 

 

Dr. Joseph Glenmullen's withdrawal symptom checklist

 

Dysautonomia (autonomic dysregulation)

 

and other discussions of symptoms in the Symptoms and Self-Care forum.

 

[Sofa]

My cognition is even worse now, and my brain fog is intense. Cant visualize or daydream at all. My anxiety is constant and my depression and hoplesssness is so bad. Still no good emotions and very few bad emotions. Dont Feel sorrow, just despair. 
 

Tinnitus and headpressure is also worse. 
 

Hit my head the other day and felt a worsening, also felt worsening after going to the message therapist. Could this have an impact on my symptoms, or could it be the tea i drak those days? Not reacted to tea before.
 

Think i ***** up a long time ago. My worsening symptoms are probably because of food or supplements i did not think would have any effect. 
 

And then the benzo and zopiclone just made it worse. I am sensitive to everything now it seems. Can even take paracetamol. 
 

Just really hope i can heal from this and find myself back. 
 

 

[Sofa]

@rebeccaannxo

I still have vision problems. Its more like i cant process what i see, snd things look strange in a weird way. Also sometimes have blurry vision.

[Sofa]

@rebeccaannxo My withdrawal from Remeron started in january, while my withdrawal from benzo started in october -21, and zyprexa july -21. 
 

Symptoms now i think are mostly Remeron, but also some benzo.

 

I have been getting steadily worse since january. Cant pinpoint the exact trigger for all of the worsenings. But some may be due to zopiclone and benzo, which i started the last month (mostly zopiclone, only 15 mg valium), and Maybe ginger, which i had in a tea last friday before suddenly getting worse the same day. Now everything seems to set me off. 

[LostPhil]

23 hours ago, rebeccaannxo said:

@Sofa

 

Are you still having vision problems? 
I’m suffering from distorted vision, dizziness, blurriness, almost a static like vision. 

My eyes definitely seem blurry on mirt. Hoping they get better when I’m off it

[LostPhil]

20 minutes ago, rebeccaannxo said:

I’m 6 months after an adverse reaction to 3 pills of Lexapro and suffering so bad with vision and balance problems  

So sorry to hear that. And you’ve had everything else checked? Balance can be due to ear problems

[LostPhil]

12 hours ago, Sofa said:

@rebeccaannxo My withdrawal from Remeron started in january, while my withdrawal from benzo started in october -21, and zyprexa july -21. 
 

Symptoms now i think are mostly Remeron, but also some benzo.

 

I have been getting steadily worse since january. Cant pinpoint the exact trigger for all of the worsenings. But some may be due to zopiclone and benzo, which i started the last month (mostly zopiclone, only 15 mg valium), and Maybe ginger, which i had in a tea last friday before suddenly getting worse the same day. Now everything seems to set me off. 

 

My gut says as we get older we get more sensitive to medications as we dont have that “rude health” that can cope with nearly everything when we are young and vital. 

[Sofa]

@Altostrata @ChessieCat

 

My head pressure is getting worse. Its spread to my whole brain, and it gets worse when i try to think. Just writing this hurts because the pressure in my brain is building up. Is this normal to have pressure when trying to think or visualize?

[Altostrata]

What happened in the hospital?

[Sofa]

@Altostrata

Nothing special happend. No more medication or anything except paracetamol for the head pressure. 
 

Its more because i cant take care of myself very well, and have panic attacks because of the akathisia that last really long. Its more to try and stabilize the anxiety, but its not really working. Starting to think some if my anxiety might be because of withdrawal

[Altostrata]

22 minutes ago, Sofa said:

Starting to think some if my anxiety might be because of withdrawal

 

Please review this topic from the beginning to see staff comments about this.