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EttaLouWho: looking for support


EttaLouWho

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Hi Everyone.  Like the title says I am new to this site and am looking for support in my withdrawal.  I was started on Prozac in 1995 at the age of 15 after experiencing a lot of trauma from an abusive childhood and multiple deaths/tragedies.  Paxil was added in the following year in 1996, followed by a switch to Celexa in 1997.  I was diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue/Fibromyalgia in 1996 and in 1998 my specialist suggested I switch to Cymbalta to help deal with the widespread pain along with the depression and anxiety.  I stayed on 120 mg of Cymbalta until 2018 at which point I told my doctor I needed to switch because I didn't even feel human anymore.  Looking back, I can see where antidepressants never really helped me--I had constant suicidal ideation, crippling depression, OCD, and intermittent panic attacks/anxiety.  I tapered down over a couple of months but when I tried to discontinue the Cymbalta completely I was thrown into a blind rage and had to go back up to 20mg.  Over the next couple of months, I broke the capsules open and removed a specific number of beads inside each week to help me taper more slowly.  Bupropion was added in and I was able to discontinue the Cymbalta in early 2019. 

 

Around 2018 I was started on 0.5mg of Clonazepam twice a day for a neurological disorder as well. In April 2019 I moved states for a new job  where I knew no one and had no support system.  The job proved to be extremely stressful and I have not adjusted well to the new location.  I began ketamine infusions which proved very successful for about 6 months before all of my symptoms returned and the treatment was discontinued. In 2020 my antidepressant was changed three times (Trintellix, Pristiq, and Fluvoxamine) resulting in me gaining a ton of weight and essentially having a nervous breakdown.  I had to take 6 weeks of leave from my job to be in an Intensive Outpatient Program at which time my doctor weaned me off the Clonazapem over 4 weeks.  I went into severe benzo withdrawal-- experiencing insomnia, night terrors, horrible benzo belly, crippling anxiety and panic attacks, rapid mood swings, nausea, and diarrhea.  I had to go back to work during this time (thankfully I work from home) but withdrawal lasted for about 5-6 months.  During this time I was started on 15mg of Buspirone three times a day for anxiety. 

 

In November of 2021, my psychiatrist told me she thought I had treatment resistant depression and encouraged me to wean off of the Fluvoxamine over a 6 week period and to begin neurofeedback.  My last dose of Fluvoxamine was on about 12/10/2021.  I started going through severe withdrawal including insomnia with horrible night terrors when I was able to sleep, severe mood swings, hysterical sobbing fits, severe suicidal ideation and depression, uncontrollable rage, uncontrollable full body tremors, nausea, diarrhea, OCD/intrusive thoughts, debilitating anxiety and panic attacks, horrible restless leg syndrome, brain zaps, widespread body pain, and tachycardia in the 130s.  In January 2022 I was started on 300mg of gabapentin for the anxiety, restless legs, and body pain. In February I started taking 2000mg of L-tryptophan to help with the withdrawal symptoms, 2400mg of n acetyl cysteine to help with the OCD, and 300mg of magnesium for the depression.  I tried l theanine for the anxiety which only made it worse. The buspirone does not seem to help the anxiety at all but I am too afraid to taper down currently. The neurofeedback was also too intense and my brain could not handle the stimulation so it was discontinued.  I began a gabapentin taper from 300mg to 200 mg on 8/5/2022 which resulted in a worsening of all symptoms.  I sleep for about 4-5 hours a night waking between 3:30-4:30am in a blind panic which lasts until about 11am.  My heart rate during this time is between 115-140 bpm and I have severe nausea and diarrhea.  I am still working Monday-Friday and I am so scared I am going to lose my job because I feel like I am barely functioning most days. 

 

I am single, 42, alone, and terrified by what I am experiencing.  I have a few close friends in other states, but they think I should be over my withdrawal by now and are incapable or unwilling to support me.  They tell me to just go back on the meds but I have read where it is unlikely to stop the withdrawal.  I have no family to lean on.  I have been doing a ton of research on my own and think the waking in the middle of the night in the panic attacks is probably due to cortisol levels.  I also experience a significant uptake in symptoms around 3:30/4pm every day which may be due to in part to circadian rhythms.  Just trying to hold on as I know I am only 8 months in. Thank you for taking the time to read this.

1995  Prozac    1996  Prozac and Paxil    1997  Celexa   1998-2018  Cymbalta 60-120mg-- failed taper and restarted at 20mg after development of intense rage--finally able to taper off in late 2018    2017-2021  Clonazepam 0.5mg BID--discontinued over 4 weeks in April 2021 resulting in severe benzo withdrawal for 5 months maybe still ongoing at time of AD rapid taper in Dec 2021

2018-2019  Bupropion    *Have been polydrugged since 1995 with a variety of benzos, sleeping pills, anxioltyics, and ADs.  Too many to list or remember. Never properly tapered by doctor before switching medicines* 2020  Started on Buspirone 15mg three times a day    2020-2021   Antidepressant was changed three times: Trintellix, Pristiq, Fluvoxamine.  Underwent 6 months of ketamine infusions. Advised to discontinue all meds due to inefficacy in November 2021.  Weaned off Fluvoxamine by psychiatrist over 6 weeks-- last dose ~December 10, 2021.  Severe ongoing withdrawal.   February 2021  Started on 300mg Gabapentin for anxiety, restless legs, insomnia, and wide spread body pain from withdrawal.  Began Gabapentin taper to 200mg on 8/5/2022. Worsened withdrawal symptoms.  Also began 2000mg of L-Tryptophan for depression/AD withdrawal, 2400mg of N Acetyl Cysteine for OCD and 300mg of Magnesium for depression.  Began L-Tryptophan taper from 2000mg to 1500mg on 8/14/2022. Completed l-tryptophan and NAC taper on 8/29/2022. 

Current Meds: 15mg of Buspirone twice a day (morning and night since 2020), 5 mg Buspirone at midday (Started taper of midday dose from 15mg to 5 mg in September 2023) , 200mg of gabapentin at night (Since August 2022), 1mg of alprazolam at night (Started at 0.25mg in Jan 2023 and gradually upped to 1-2mg three times a week until end of 11/2023--reinstated 1mg daily on 12/1/2023), 80mg propranolol in the morning, 10mg Zyrtec in the morning, birth control pills Current Supplements: 300 mg of magnesium citrate midday, 1000mg of Fish Oil in the morning, 1mg melatonin at night

 

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  • ChessieCat changed the title to EttaLouWho: looking for support
  • Administrator

Welcome, @EttaLouWho

 

You've been through a lot. Thanks for adding your signature. What times o'clock do you take your drugs, with their dosages?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

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@Altostrata

 

At 6am I take 15mg buspirone, 500mg l-tryptophan, 100mg magnesium, and 600mg N Acetyl Cysteine.  At 12:30pm I take 15mg of buspirone, 500 mg of l-tryptophan, and 1200 mg of N Acetyl Cysteine. At 8pm I take 500 mg of l-tryptophan and 600mg of N Acetyl Cysteine. At 9pm I take 15mg of buspirone, 200mg of gabapentin, and a Benadryl to help me sleep. I was taking 100mg of magnesium at 8pm but I saw on the site that it can interfere with gabapentin absorption so I stopped. 

1995  Prozac    1996  Prozac and Paxil    1997  Celexa   1998-2018  Cymbalta 60-120mg-- failed taper and restarted at 20mg after development of intense rage--finally able to taper off in late 2018    2017-2021  Clonazepam 0.5mg BID--discontinued over 4 weeks in April 2021 resulting in severe benzo withdrawal for 5 months maybe still ongoing at time of AD rapid taper in Dec 2021

2018-2019  Bupropion    *Have been polydrugged since 1995 with a variety of benzos, sleeping pills, anxioltyics, and ADs.  Too many to list or remember. Never properly tapered by doctor before switching medicines* 2020  Started on Buspirone 15mg three times a day    2020-2021   Antidepressant was changed three times: Trintellix, Pristiq, Fluvoxamine.  Underwent 6 months of ketamine infusions. Advised to discontinue all meds due to inefficacy in November 2021.  Weaned off Fluvoxamine by psychiatrist over 6 weeks-- last dose ~December 10, 2021.  Severe ongoing withdrawal.   February 2021  Started on 300mg Gabapentin for anxiety, restless legs, insomnia, and wide spread body pain from withdrawal.  Began Gabapentin taper to 200mg on 8/5/2022. Worsened withdrawal symptoms.  Also began 2000mg of L-Tryptophan for depression/AD withdrawal, 2400mg of N Acetyl Cysteine for OCD and 300mg of Magnesium for depression.  Began L-Tryptophan taper from 2000mg to 1500mg on 8/14/2022. Completed l-tryptophan and NAC taper on 8/29/2022. 

Current Meds: 15mg of Buspirone twice a day (morning and night since 2020), 5 mg Buspirone at midday (Started taper of midday dose from 15mg to 5 mg in September 2023) , 200mg of gabapentin at night (Since August 2022), 1mg of alprazolam at night (Started at 0.25mg in Jan 2023 and gradually upped to 1-2mg three times a week until end of 11/2023--reinstated 1mg daily on 12/1/2023), 80mg propranolol in the morning, 10mg Zyrtec in the morning, birth control pills Current Supplements: 300 mg of magnesium citrate midday, 1000mg of Fish Oil in the morning, 1mg melatonin at night

 

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  • Administrator

What effect do you feel from 500mg l-tryptophan and 600mg N Acetyl Cysteine? Have you always taken them with buspirone?

 

What are your most prominent current symptoms? How's your sleep?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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I think the l-tryptophan and the NAC really helped when I was in the throes of acute withdrawal. They seemed to stabilize me a bit. Im not sure if I can actually tell what they do now but I’ve been afraid to stop them. I have always taken the meds at the same time because my job is very demanding and I can be in meetings for hours at a time and forget to take them otherwise. 
 

My main symptoms for this wave have been debilitating anxiety, insomnia with severe panic attacks upon waking at about 4am that last for hours, tachycardia, nausea and diarrhea. I recognize that my symptoms seem to change a bit each wave. Miraculously today was the best day I have had in in weeks possibly months. 

1995  Prozac    1996  Prozac and Paxil    1997  Celexa   1998-2018  Cymbalta 60-120mg-- failed taper and restarted at 20mg after development of intense rage--finally able to taper off in late 2018    2017-2021  Clonazepam 0.5mg BID--discontinued over 4 weeks in April 2021 resulting in severe benzo withdrawal for 5 months maybe still ongoing at time of AD rapid taper in Dec 2021

2018-2019  Bupropion    *Have been polydrugged since 1995 with a variety of benzos, sleeping pills, anxioltyics, and ADs.  Too many to list or remember. Never properly tapered by doctor before switching medicines* 2020  Started on Buspirone 15mg three times a day    2020-2021   Antidepressant was changed three times: Trintellix, Pristiq, Fluvoxamine.  Underwent 6 months of ketamine infusions. Advised to discontinue all meds due to inefficacy in November 2021.  Weaned off Fluvoxamine by psychiatrist over 6 weeks-- last dose ~December 10, 2021.  Severe ongoing withdrawal.   February 2021  Started on 300mg Gabapentin for anxiety, restless legs, insomnia, and wide spread body pain from withdrawal.  Began Gabapentin taper to 200mg on 8/5/2022. Worsened withdrawal symptoms.  Also began 2000mg of L-Tryptophan for depression/AD withdrawal, 2400mg of N Acetyl Cysteine for OCD and 300mg of Magnesium for depression.  Began L-Tryptophan taper from 2000mg to 1500mg on 8/14/2022. Completed l-tryptophan and NAC taper on 8/29/2022. 

Current Meds: 15mg of Buspirone twice a day (morning and night since 2020), 5 mg Buspirone at midday (Started taper of midday dose from 15mg to 5 mg in September 2023) , 200mg of gabapentin at night (Since August 2022), 1mg of alprazolam at night (Started at 0.25mg in Jan 2023 and gradually upped to 1-2mg three times a week until end of 11/2023--reinstated 1mg daily on 12/1/2023), 80mg propranolol in the morning, 10mg Zyrtec in the morning, birth control pills Current Supplements: 300 mg of magnesium citrate midday, 1000mg of Fish Oil in the morning, 1mg melatonin at night

 

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  • Administrator

NAC is hard on the digestive system, suggest you gradually go off over a week.

 

Also suggest you stop 600mg of Calcium with Vitamin D QD, Liver Detox Supplement (milk thistle combination), they may also be irritating your stomach or causing other problems.

 

What is your sleep pattern?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Thank you so much! I will do that. 
 

I’ve currently been falling asleep around 11pm and waking up around 4am in a complete panic. I’m unable to go back to sleep after that. 
 

 

1995  Prozac    1996  Prozac and Paxil    1997  Celexa   1998-2018  Cymbalta 60-120mg-- failed taper and restarted at 20mg after development of intense rage--finally able to taper off in late 2018    2017-2021  Clonazepam 0.5mg BID--discontinued over 4 weeks in April 2021 resulting in severe benzo withdrawal for 5 months maybe still ongoing at time of AD rapid taper in Dec 2021

2018-2019  Bupropion    *Have been polydrugged since 1995 with a variety of benzos, sleeping pills, anxioltyics, and ADs.  Too many to list or remember. Never properly tapered by doctor before switching medicines* 2020  Started on Buspirone 15mg three times a day    2020-2021   Antidepressant was changed three times: Trintellix, Pristiq, Fluvoxamine.  Underwent 6 months of ketamine infusions. Advised to discontinue all meds due to inefficacy in November 2021.  Weaned off Fluvoxamine by psychiatrist over 6 weeks-- last dose ~December 10, 2021.  Severe ongoing withdrawal.   February 2021  Started on 300mg Gabapentin for anxiety, restless legs, insomnia, and wide spread body pain from withdrawal.  Began Gabapentin taper to 200mg on 8/5/2022. Worsened withdrawal symptoms.  Also began 2000mg of L-Tryptophan for depression/AD withdrawal, 2400mg of N Acetyl Cysteine for OCD and 300mg of Magnesium for depression.  Began L-Tryptophan taper from 2000mg to 1500mg on 8/14/2022. Completed l-tryptophan and NAC taper on 8/29/2022. 

Current Meds: 15mg of Buspirone twice a day (morning and night since 2020), 5 mg Buspirone at midday (Started taper of midday dose from 15mg to 5 mg in September 2023) , 200mg of gabapentin at night (Since August 2022), 1mg of alprazolam at night (Started at 0.25mg in Jan 2023 and gradually upped to 1-2mg three times a week until end of 11/2023--reinstated 1mg daily on 12/1/2023), 80mg propranolol in the morning, 10mg Zyrtec in the morning, birth control pills Current Supplements: 300 mg of magnesium citrate midday, 1000mg of Fish Oil in the morning, 1mg melatonin at night

 

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  • Administrator

Five hours of sleep is not terrible. Please clear out those supplements and let us know how you're doing. We can address the other symptoms then.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Thank you so much. I really appreciate your help. 

1995  Prozac    1996  Prozac and Paxil    1997  Celexa   1998-2018  Cymbalta 60-120mg-- failed taper and restarted at 20mg after development of intense rage--finally able to taper off in late 2018    2017-2021  Clonazepam 0.5mg BID--discontinued over 4 weeks in April 2021 resulting in severe benzo withdrawal for 5 months maybe still ongoing at time of AD rapid taper in Dec 2021

2018-2019  Bupropion    *Have been polydrugged since 1995 with a variety of benzos, sleeping pills, anxioltyics, and ADs.  Too many to list or remember. Never properly tapered by doctor before switching medicines* 2020  Started on Buspirone 15mg three times a day    2020-2021   Antidepressant was changed three times: Trintellix, Pristiq, Fluvoxamine.  Underwent 6 months of ketamine infusions. Advised to discontinue all meds due to inefficacy in November 2021.  Weaned off Fluvoxamine by psychiatrist over 6 weeks-- last dose ~December 10, 2021.  Severe ongoing withdrawal.   February 2021  Started on 300mg Gabapentin for anxiety, restless legs, insomnia, and wide spread body pain from withdrawal.  Began Gabapentin taper to 200mg on 8/5/2022. Worsened withdrawal symptoms.  Also began 2000mg of L-Tryptophan for depression/AD withdrawal, 2400mg of N Acetyl Cysteine for OCD and 300mg of Magnesium for depression.  Began L-Tryptophan taper from 2000mg to 1500mg on 8/14/2022. Completed l-tryptophan and NAC taper on 8/29/2022. 

Current Meds: 15mg of Buspirone twice a day (morning and night since 2020), 5 mg Buspirone at midday (Started taper of midday dose from 15mg to 5 mg in September 2023) , 200mg of gabapentin at night (Since August 2022), 1mg of alprazolam at night (Started at 0.25mg in Jan 2023 and gradually upped to 1-2mg three times a week until end of 11/2023--reinstated 1mg daily on 12/1/2023), 80mg propranolol in the morning, 10mg Zyrtec in the morning, birth control pills Current Supplements: 300 mg of magnesium citrate midday, 1000mg of Fish Oil in the morning, 1mg melatonin at night

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus
4 hours ago, EttaLouWho said:

waking up around 4am in a complete panic

 

This might be from cortisol.  At least if you understand what is happening it can be less scary.  When we don't know what is going on we can end up adding fear to it.

 

early-morning-waking-managing-the-morning-cortisol-spike

 

 

* NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA *

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED:  (6 year taper)      0mg Pristiq  on 13th November 2021

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021   LAST DOSE 0.0025mg

Post 0 updates start here    My tapering program     My Intro (goes to tapering graph)

 VIDEO:   Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management

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@ChessieCat @Altostratathank you. Yes knowing what is happening does help the fear. I have pretty severe Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and I was so ill when I was diagnosed that the doctors told me I would never graduate high school much less work. I persevered and was able to graduate college and grad school. But at times I was sleeping 18- 20 hours a day and just so sick I could barely get out of bed. I’m 42 now and the disruption to my sleep cycle has really impacted my ability to work and support myself. On the weekends I would have to make up for not getting more sleep during the week even though I was sleeping around 8-9 hours a night. Reducing that to five hours a night every night, including weekends, and then waking in a panic has made me very ill. I know I am very lucky to be sleeping five hours at all but I guess I am just not starting at a normal level of need in terms of sleep. 

1995  Prozac    1996  Prozac and Paxil    1997  Celexa   1998-2018  Cymbalta 60-120mg-- failed taper and restarted at 20mg after development of intense rage--finally able to taper off in late 2018    2017-2021  Clonazepam 0.5mg BID--discontinued over 4 weeks in April 2021 resulting in severe benzo withdrawal for 5 months maybe still ongoing at time of AD rapid taper in Dec 2021

2018-2019  Bupropion    *Have been polydrugged since 1995 with a variety of benzos, sleeping pills, anxioltyics, and ADs.  Too many to list or remember. Never properly tapered by doctor before switching medicines* 2020  Started on Buspirone 15mg three times a day    2020-2021   Antidepressant was changed three times: Trintellix, Pristiq, Fluvoxamine.  Underwent 6 months of ketamine infusions. Advised to discontinue all meds due to inefficacy in November 2021.  Weaned off Fluvoxamine by psychiatrist over 6 weeks-- last dose ~December 10, 2021.  Severe ongoing withdrawal.   February 2021  Started on 300mg Gabapentin for anxiety, restless legs, insomnia, and wide spread body pain from withdrawal.  Began Gabapentin taper to 200mg on 8/5/2022. Worsened withdrawal symptoms.  Also began 2000mg of L-Tryptophan for depression/AD withdrawal, 2400mg of N Acetyl Cysteine for OCD and 300mg of Magnesium for depression.  Began L-Tryptophan taper from 2000mg to 1500mg on 8/14/2022. Completed l-tryptophan and NAC taper on 8/29/2022. 

Current Meds: 15mg of Buspirone twice a day (morning and night since 2020), 5 mg Buspirone at midday (Started taper of midday dose from 15mg to 5 mg in September 2023) , 200mg of gabapentin at night (Since August 2022), 1mg of alprazolam at night (Started at 0.25mg in Jan 2023 and gradually upped to 1-2mg three times a week until end of 11/2023--reinstated 1mg daily on 12/1/2023), 80mg propranolol in the morning, 10mg Zyrtec in the morning, birth control pills Current Supplements: 300 mg of magnesium citrate midday, 1000mg of Fish Oil in the morning, 1mg melatonin at night

 

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  • Administrator

Nobody likes the sleep deprivation associated with withdrawal syndrome, but those supplements may be contributing to it. Among all the stuff you're taking, they are the easiest to exclude.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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@Altostrata I began tapering off of the NAC today and also stopped the calcium and liver detox supplement. 

1995  Prozac    1996  Prozac and Paxil    1997  Celexa   1998-2018  Cymbalta 60-120mg-- failed taper and restarted at 20mg after development of intense rage--finally able to taper off in late 2018    2017-2021  Clonazepam 0.5mg BID--discontinued over 4 weeks in April 2021 resulting in severe benzo withdrawal for 5 months maybe still ongoing at time of AD rapid taper in Dec 2021

2018-2019  Bupropion    *Have been polydrugged since 1995 with a variety of benzos, sleeping pills, anxioltyics, and ADs.  Too many to list or remember. Never properly tapered by doctor before switching medicines* 2020  Started on Buspirone 15mg three times a day    2020-2021   Antidepressant was changed three times: Trintellix, Pristiq, Fluvoxamine.  Underwent 6 months of ketamine infusions. Advised to discontinue all meds due to inefficacy in November 2021.  Weaned off Fluvoxamine by psychiatrist over 6 weeks-- last dose ~December 10, 2021.  Severe ongoing withdrawal.   February 2021  Started on 300mg Gabapentin for anxiety, restless legs, insomnia, and wide spread body pain from withdrawal.  Began Gabapentin taper to 200mg on 8/5/2022. Worsened withdrawal symptoms.  Also began 2000mg of L-Tryptophan for depression/AD withdrawal, 2400mg of N Acetyl Cysteine for OCD and 300mg of Magnesium for depression.  Began L-Tryptophan taper from 2000mg to 1500mg on 8/14/2022. Completed l-tryptophan and NAC taper on 8/29/2022. 

Current Meds: 15mg of Buspirone twice a day (morning and night since 2020), 5 mg Buspirone at midday (Started taper of midday dose from 15mg to 5 mg in September 2023) , 200mg of gabapentin at night (Since August 2022), 1mg of alprazolam at night (Started at 0.25mg in Jan 2023 and gradually upped to 1-2mg three times a week until end of 11/2023--reinstated 1mg daily on 12/1/2023), 80mg propranolol in the morning, 10mg Zyrtec in the morning, birth control pills Current Supplements: 300 mg of magnesium citrate midday, 1000mg of Fish Oil in the morning, 1mg melatonin at night

 

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  • Administrator

Please let us know of any significant changes in your symptom pattern.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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@AltostrataAre there any coping strategies for full body tremors? They can last for hours and are very debilitating. Do you recommend I stay on the l-tryptophan or slowly wean off of that? I tapered from 2000mg to 1500mg on 8/14/2022 but don’t know if I should hold or continue to taper in a week or so. So far no change in symptoms since I started that taper. 

1995  Prozac    1996  Prozac and Paxil    1997  Celexa   1998-2018  Cymbalta 60-120mg-- failed taper and restarted at 20mg after development of intense rage--finally able to taper off in late 2018    2017-2021  Clonazepam 0.5mg BID--discontinued over 4 weeks in April 2021 resulting in severe benzo withdrawal for 5 months maybe still ongoing at time of AD rapid taper in Dec 2021

2018-2019  Bupropion    *Have been polydrugged since 1995 with a variety of benzos, sleeping pills, anxioltyics, and ADs.  Too many to list or remember. Never properly tapered by doctor before switching medicines* 2020  Started on Buspirone 15mg three times a day    2020-2021   Antidepressant was changed three times: Trintellix, Pristiq, Fluvoxamine.  Underwent 6 months of ketamine infusions. Advised to discontinue all meds due to inefficacy in November 2021.  Weaned off Fluvoxamine by psychiatrist over 6 weeks-- last dose ~December 10, 2021.  Severe ongoing withdrawal.   February 2021  Started on 300mg Gabapentin for anxiety, restless legs, insomnia, and wide spread body pain from withdrawal.  Began Gabapentin taper to 200mg on 8/5/2022. Worsened withdrawal symptoms.  Also began 2000mg of L-Tryptophan for depression/AD withdrawal, 2400mg of N Acetyl Cysteine for OCD and 300mg of Magnesium for depression.  Began L-Tryptophan taper from 2000mg to 1500mg on 8/14/2022. Completed l-tryptophan and NAC taper on 8/29/2022. 

Current Meds: 15mg of Buspirone twice a day (morning and night since 2020), 5 mg Buspirone at midday (Started taper of midday dose from 15mg to 5 mg in September 2023) , 200mg of gabapentin at night (Since August 2022), 1mg of alprazolam at night (Started at 0.25mg in Jan 2023 and gradually upped to 1-2mg three times a week until end of 11/2023--reinstated 1mg daily on 12/1/2023), 80mg propranolol in the morning, 10mg Zyrtec in the morning, birth control pills Current Supplements: 300 mg of magnesium citrate midday, 1000mg of Fish Oil in the morning, 1mg melatonin at night

 

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  • Administrator

Are these tremors better or worse at any particular times of day?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Yes, they seem to start around 7am most days but sometimes that can be delayed and not start until around 10am like today. They are especially bad if I am trying to just lay down and rest. Sometimes they last for four hours or more. 

1995  Prozac    1996  Prozac and Paxil    1997  Celexa   1998-2018  Cymbalta 60-120mg-- failed taper and restarted at 20mg after development of intense rage--finally able to taper off in late 2018    2017-2021  Clonazepam 0.5mg BID--discontinued over 4 weeks in April 2021 resulting in severe benzo withdrawal for 5 months maybe still ongoing at time of AD rapid taper in Dec 2021

2018-2019  Bupropion    *Have been polydrugged since 1995 with a variety of benzos, sleeping pills, anxioltyics, and ADs.  Too many to list or remember. Never properly tapered by doctor before switching medicines* 2020  Started on Buspirone 15mg three times a day    2020-2021   Antidepressant was changed three times: Trintellix, Pristiq, Fluvoxamine.  Underwent 6 months of ketamine infusions. Advised to discontinue all meds due to inefficacy in November 2021.  Weaned off Fluvoxamine by psychiatrist over 6 weeks-- last dose ~December 10, 2021.  Severe ongoing withdrawal.   February 2021  Started on 300mg Gabapentin for anxiety, restless legs, insomnia, and wide spread body pain from withdrawal.  Began Gabapentin taper to 200mg on 8/5/2022. Worsened withdrawal symptoms.  Also began 2000mg of L-Tryptophan for depression/AD withdrawal, 2400mg of N Acetyl Cysteine for OCD and 300mg of Magnesium for depression.  Began L-Tryptophan taper from 2000mg to 1500mg on 8/14/2022. Completed l-tryptophan and NAC taper on 8/29/2022. 

Current Meds: 15mg of Buspirone twice a day (morning and night since 2020), 5 mg Buspirone at midday (Started taper of midday dose from 15mg to 5 mg in September 2023) , 200mg of gabapentin at night (Since August 2022), 1mg of alprazolam at night (Started at 0.25mg in Jan 2023 and gradually upped to 1-2mg three times a week until end of 11/2023--reinstated 1mg daily on 12/1/2023), 80mg propranolol in the morning, 10mg Zyrtec in the morning, birth control pills Current Supplements: 300 mg of magnesium citrate midday, 1000mg of Fish Oil in the morning, 1mg melatonin at night

 

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  • Administrator

This sounds like a symptom that comes in waves. What effect do you feel from the gabapentin at night?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

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I’m not sure I notice anything per se now. In the beginning it really helped with the restless leg syndrome and insomnia but the restless leg hasn’t been an issue so much lately. 

1995  Prozac    1996  Prozac and Paxil    1997  Celexa   1998-2018  Cymbalta 60-120mg-- failed taper and restarted at 20mg after development of intense rage--finally able to taper off in late 2018    2017-2021  Clonazepam 0.5mg BID--discontinued over 4 weeks in April 2021 resulting in severe benzo withdrawal for 5 months maybe still ongoing at time of AD rapid taper in Dec 2021

2018-2019  Bupropion    *Have been polydrugged since 1995 with a variety of benzos, sleeping pills, anxioltyics, and ADs.  Too many to list or remember. Never properly tapered by doctor before switching medicines* 2020  Started on Buspirone 15mg three times a day    2020-2021   Antidepressant was changed three times: Trintellix, Pristiq, Fluvoxamine.  Underwent 6 months of ketamine infusions. Advised to discontinue all meds due to inefficacy in November 2021.  Weaned off Fluvoxamine by psychiatrist over 6 weeks-- last dose ~December 10, 2021.  Severe ongoing withdrawal.   February 2021  Started on 300mg Gabapentin for anxiety, restless legs, insomnia, and wide spread body pain from withdrawal.  Began Gabapentin taper to 200mg on 8/5/2022. Worsened withdrawal symptoms.  Also began 2000mg of L-Tryptophan for depression/AD withdrawal, 2400mg of N Acetyl Cysteine for OCD and 300mg of Magnesium for depression.  Began L-Tryptophan taper from 2000mg to 1500mg on 8/14/2022. Completed l-tryptophan and NAC taper on 8/29/2022. 

Current Meds: 15mg of Buspirone twice a day (morning and night since 2020), 5 mg Buspirone at midday (Started taper of midday dose from 15mg to 5 mg in September 2023) , 200mg of gabapentin at night (Since August 2022), 1mg of alprazolam at night (Started at 0.25mg in Jan 2023 and gradually upped to 1-2mg three times a week until end of 11/2023--reinstated 1mg daily on 12/1/2023), 80mg propranolol in the morning, 10mg Zyrtec in the morning, birth control pills Current Supplements: 300 mg of magnesium citrate midday, 1000mg of Fish Oil in the morning, 1mg melatonin at night

 

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  • Administrator

What exactly are you taking now, at what times o'clock and dosages? Has your symptom pattern changed?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

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Below are all of my medications and supplements:
 

6am: 50mg metoprolol ER, 15mg of buspirone, 1000 mg of fish oil, 100mg magnesium, 600mg NAC, 500 mg l-tryptophan, 500mg curcumin, 10mg Zyrtec

 

~12:30pm: 15mg buspirone, 100mg magnesium, 500mg l-tryptophan

 

7:30pm: 500mg l-tryptophan, 600 mg NAC, 1000mg fish oil

 

9:00pm: 15mg of buspirone, 25mg diphenhydramine, 200mg gabapentin, birth control pill

 

I am still experiencing full body tremors for up to 4 hours per day, anxiety, tachycardia, facial tension especially around my mouth, possible facial tic (left side of my mouth seems to pull inwards—just figuring out this could be withdrawal related), panic attacks, difficulty sleeping past 4:30am and waking in terror, diarrhea has improved but still present, frequent urination, difficulty concentrating, headaches. I’m sure I am leaving other symptoms out but this is what comes to mind right now. Symptoms have seemed to be a bit better the past three days. 

1995  Prozac    1996  Prozac and Paxil    1997  Celexa   1998-2018  Cymbalta 60-120mg-- failed taper and restarted at 20mg after development of intense rage--finally able to taper off in late 2018    2017-2021  Clonazepam 0.5mg BID--discontinued over 4 weeks in April 2021 resulting in severe benzo withdrawal for 5 months maybe still ongoing at time of AD rapid taper in Dec 2021

2018-2019  Bupropion    *Have been polydrugged since 1995 with a variety of benzos, sleeping pills, anxioltyics, and ADs.  Too many to list or remember. Never properly tapered by doctor before switching medicines* 2020  Started on Buspirone 15mg three times a day    2020-2021   Antidepressant was changed three times: Trintellix, Pristiq, Fluvoxamine.  Underwent 6 months of ketamine infusions. Advised to discontinue all meds due to inefficacy in November 2021.  Weaned off Fluvoxamine by psychiatrist over 6 weeks-- last dose ~December 10, 2021.  Severe ongoing withdrawal.   February 2021  Started on 300mg Gabapentin for anxiety, restless legs, insomnia, and wide spread body pain from withdrawal.  Began Gabapentin taper to 200mg on 8/5/2022. Worsened withdrawal symptoms.  Also began 2000mg of L-Tryptophan for depression/AD withdrawal, 2400mg of N Acetyl Cysteine for OCD and 300mg of Magnesium for depression.  Began L-Tryptophan taper from 2000mg to 1500mg on 8/14/2022. Completed l-tryptophan and NAC taper on 8/29/2022. 

Current Meds: 15mg of Buspirone twice a day (morning and night since 2020), 5 mg Buspirone at midday (Started taper of midday dose from 15mg to 5 mg in September 2023) , 200mg of gabapentin at night (Since August 2022), 1mg of alprazolam at night (Started at 0.25mg in Jan 2023 and gradually upped to 1-2mg three times a week until end of 11/2023--reinstated 1mg daily on 12/1/2023), 80mg propranolol in the morning, 10mg Zyrtec in the morning, birth control pills Current Supplements: 300 mg of magnesium citrate midday, 1000mg of Fish Oil in the morning, 1mg melatonin at night

 

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  • Administrator

I thought you were going off NAC and other supplements? You mentioned gut upset among your symptoms?

 

The NAC may be causing your diarrhea. 

 

Other than the tremors, do your symptoms occur at any particular times of day? 

 

 

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

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I am in the process of tapering off of the NAC and L-tryptophan. I should be off the NAC by the end of the week but I am tapering the l tryptophan every two weeks. I am afraid I will have a bad reaction if I stop the L-tryptophan cold turkey or taper it too quickly. I can stop the curcumin if you think I should. 


The worst of my anxiety used to be in the mornings but over the last week it has switched to the afternoons. It is always present however. The nausea comes and goes throughout the day same as the diarrhea. Just when I think my symptoms are in a stable pattern they seem to change. 
 

 

1995  Prozac    1996  Prozac and Paxil    1997  Celexa   1998-2018  Cymbalta 60-120mg-- failed taper and restarted at 20mg after development of intense rage--finally able to taper off in late 2018    2017-2021  Clonazepam 0.5mg BID--discontinued over 4 weeks in April 2021 resulting in severe benzo withdrawal for 5 months maybe still ongoing at time of AD rapid taper in Dec 2021

2018-2019  Bupropion    *Have been polydrugged since 1995 with a variety of benzos, sleeping pills, anxioltyics, and ADs.  Too many to list or remember. Never properly tapered by doctor before switching medicines* 2020  Started on Buspirone 15mg three times a day    2020-2021   Antidepressant was changed three times: Trintellix, Pristiq, Fluvoxamine.  Underwent 6 months of ketamine infusions. Advised to discontinue all meds due to inefficacy in November 2021.  Weaned off Fluvoxamine by psychiatrist over 6 weeks-- last dose ~December 10, 2021.  Severe ongoing withdrawal.   February 2021  Started on 300mg Gabapentin for anxiety, restless legs, insomnia, and wide spread body pain from withdrawal.  Began Gabapentin taper to 200mg on 8/5/2022. Worsened withdrawal symptoms.  Also began 2000mg of L-Tryptophan for depression/AD withdrawal, 2400mg of N Acetyl Cysteine for OCD and 300mg of Magnesium for depression.  Began L-Tryptophan taper from 2000mg to 1500mg on 8/14/2022. Completed l-tryptophan and NAC taper on 8/29/2022. 

Current Meds: 15mg of Buspirone twice a day (morning and night since 2020), 5 mg Buspirone at midday (Started taper of midday dose from 15mg to 5 mg in September 2023) , 200mg of gabapentin at night (Since August 2022), 1mg of alprazolam at night (Started at 0.25mg in Jan 2023 and gradually upped to 1-2mg three times a week until end of 11/2023--reinstated 1mg daily on 12/1/2023), 80mg propranolol in the morning, 10mg Zyrtec in the morning, birth control pills Current Supplements: 300 mg of magnesium citrate midday, 1000mg of Fish Oil in the morning, 1mg melatonin at night

 

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  • Administrator

You do need to taper tryptophan, but you can do it faster than psychiatric drugs, such as a reduction every few days. We're not going to be able to look at your symptom pattern until you're off those supplements, including Liver Detox, which could be causing some of your complaints.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

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Ok. I am completely off the liver detox supplement and will speed up the l-tryptophan taper. I forgot to update my signature to reflect this but will do so now. 

1995  Prozac    1996  Prozac and Paxil    1997  Celexa   1998-2018  Cymbalta 60-120mg-- failed taper and restarted at 20mg after development of intense rage--finally able to taper off in late 2018    2017-2021  Clonazepam 0.5mg BID--discontinued over 4 weeks in April 2021 resulting in severe benzo withdrawal for 5 months maybe still ongoing at time of AD rapid taper in Dec 2021

2018-2019  Bupropion    *Have been polydrugged since 1995 with a variety of benzos, sleeping pills, anxioltyics, and ADs.  Too many to list or remember. Never properly tapered by doctor before switching medicines* 2020  Started on Buspirone 15mg three times a day    2020-2021   Antidepressant was changed three times: Trintellix, Pristiq, Fluvoxamine.  Underwent 6 months of ketamine infusions. Advised to discontinue all meds due to inefficacy in November 2021.  Weaned off Fluvoxamine by psychiatrist over 6 weeks-- last dose ~December 10, 2021.  Severe ongoing withdrawal.   February 2021  Started on 300mg Gabapentin for anxiety, restless legs, insomnia, and wide spread body pain from withdrawal.  Began Gabapentin taper to 200mg on 8/5/2022. Worsened withdrawal symptoms.  Also began 2000mg of L-Tryptophan for depression/AD withdrawal, 2400mg of N Acetyl Cysteine for OCD and 300mg of Magnesium for depression.  Began L-Tryptophan taper from 2000mg to 1500mg on 8/14/2022. Completed l-tryptophan and NAC taper on 8/29/2022. 

Current Meds: 15mg of Buspirone twice a day (morning and night since 2020), 5 mg Buspirone at midday (Started taper of midday dose from 15mg to 5 mg in September 2023) , 200mg of gabapentin at night (Since August 2022), 1mg of alprazolam at night (Started at 0.25mg in Jan 2023 and gradually upped to 1-2mg three times a week until end of 11/2023--reinstated 1mg daily on 12/1/2023), 80mg propranolol in the morning, 10mg Zyrtec in the morning, birth control pills Current Supplements: 300 mg of magnesium citrate midday, 1000mg of Fish Oil in the morning, 1mg melatonin at night

 

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@Altostrata I am down to 600mg of NAC at 6am and 500mg of L-tryptophan at 6am and 7:30pm. I have had a significant increase  in OCD thoughts and anxiety and don’t know if I should stop tapering these down or reinstate to a previous dose. 

1995  Prozac    1996  Prozac and Paxil    1997  Celexa   1998-2018  Cymbalta 60-120mg-- failed taper and restarted at 20mg after development of intense rage--finally able to taper off in late 2018    2017-2021  Clonazepam 0.5mg BID--discontinued over 4 weeks in April 2021 resulting in severe benzo withdrawal for 5 months maybe still ongoing at time of AD rapid taper in Dec 2021

2018-2019  Bupropion    *Have been polydrugged since 1995 with a variety of benzos, sleeping pills, anxioltyics, and ADs.  Too many to list or remember. Never properly tapered by doctor before switching medicines* 2020  Started on Buspirone 15mg three times a day    2020-2021   Antidepressant was changed three times: Trintellix, Pristiq, Fluvoxamine.  Underwent 6 months of ketamine infusions. Advised to discontinue all meds due to inefficacy in November 2021.  Weaned off Fluvoxamine by psychiatrist over 6 weeks-- last dose ~December 10, 2021.  Severe ongoing withdrawal.   February 2021  Started on 300mg Gabapentin for anxiety, restless legs, insomnia, and wide spread body pain from withdrawal.  Began Gabapentin taper to 200mg on 8/5/2022. Worsened withdrawal symptoms.  Also began 2000mg of L-Tryptophan for depression/AD withdrawal, 2400mg of N Acetyl Cysteine for OCD and 300mg of Magnesium for depression.  Began L-Tryptophan taper from 2000mg to 1500mg on 8/14/2022. Completed l-tryptophan and NAC taper on 8/29/2022. 

Current Meds: 15mg of Buspirone twice a day (morning and night since 2020), 5 mg Buspirone at midday (Started taper of midday dose from 15mg to 5 mg in September 2023) , 200mg of gabapentin at night (Since August 2022), 1mg of alprazolam at night (Started at 0.25mg in Jan 2023 and gradually upped to 1-2mg three times a week until end of 11/2023--reinstated 1mg daily on 12/1/2023), 80mg propranolol in the morning, 10mg Zyrtec in the morning, birth control pills Current Supplements: 300 mg of magnesium citrate midday, 1000mg of Fish Oil in the morning, 1mg melatonin at night

 

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  • Administrator

What about your gut symptoms?

 

What do you mean by "OCD thoughts and anxiety"? What kinds of thoughts? What are you anxious about?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

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The diarrhea has improved significantly. 
 

I struggle with body dysmorphia and the mirror checking and anxiety have increased significantly. I am also having an increase in intrusive thoughts. 

1995  Prozac    1996  Prozac and Paxil    1997  Celexa   1998-2018  Cymbalta 60-120mg-- failed taper and restarted at 20mg after development of intense rage--finally able to taper off in late 2018    2017-2021  Clonazepam 0.5mg BID--discontinued over 4 weeks in April 2021 resulting in severe benzo withdrawal for 5 months maybe still ongoing at time of AD rapid taper in Dec 2021

2018-2019  Bupropion    *Have been polydrugged since 1995 with a variety of benzos, sleeping pills, anxioltyics, and ADs.  Too many to list or remember. Never properly tapered by doctor before switching medicines* 2020  Started on Buspirone 15mg three times a day    2020-2021   Antidepressant was changed three times: Trintellix, Pristiq, Fluvoxamine.  Underwent 6 months of ketamine infusions. Advised to discontinue all meds due to inefficacy in November 2021.  Weaned off Fluvoxamine by psychiatrist over 6 weeks-- last dose ~December 10, 2021.  Severe ongoing withdrawal.   February 2021  Started on 300mg Gabapentin for anxiety, restless legs, insomnia, and wide spread body pain from withdrawal.  Began Gabapentin taper to 200mg on 8/5/2022. Worsened withdrawal symptoms.  Also began 2000mg of L-Tryptophan for depression/AD withdrawal, 2400mg of N Acetyl Cysteine for OCD and 300mg of Magnesium for depression.  Began L-Tryptophan taper from 2000mg to 1500mg on 8/14/2022. Completed l-tryptophan and NAC taper on 8/29/2022. 

Current Meds: 15mg of Buspirone twice a day (morning and night since 2020), 5 mg Buspirone at midday (Started taper of midday dose from 15mg to 5 mg in September 2023) , 200mg of gabapentin at night (Since August 2022), 1mg of alprazolam at night (Started at 0.25mg in Jan 2023 and gradually upped to 1-2mg three times a week until end of 11/2023--reinstated 1mg daily on 12/1/2023), 80mg propranolol in the morning, 10mg Zyrtec in the morning, birth control pills Current Supplements: 300 mg of magnesium citrate midday, 1000mg of Fish Oil in the morning, 1mg melatonin at night

 

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  • Administrator

The NAC and possibly other supplements were irritating your gut.

 

You will need to find ways to manage these habits of mind, we're not in a position to suggest drugs or supplements for them. Do you have a therapist?

 

Please let us know when you have stopped taking everything but

 

~12:30pm: 15mg buspirone, 100mg magnesium

 

7:30pm: 1000mg fish oil

 

9:00pm: 15mg of buspirone, 25mg diphenhydramine, 200mg gabapentin, birth control pill

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

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Ok. Yes I have a therapist. 
 

 

1995  Prozac    1996  Prozac and Paxil    1997  Celexa   1998-2018  Cymbalta 60-120mg-- failed taper and restarted at 20mg after development of intense rage--finally able to taper off in late 2018    2017-2021  Clonazepam 0.5mg BID--discontinued over 4 weeks in April 2021 resulting in severe benzo withdrawal for 5 months maybe still ongoing at time of AD rapid taper in Dec 2021

2018-2019  Bupropion    *Have been polydrugged since 1995 with a variety of benzos, sleeping pills, anxioltyics, and ADs.  Too many to list or remember. Never properly tapered by doctor before switching medicines* 2020  Started on Buspirone 15mg three times a day    2020-2021   Antidepressant was changed three times: Trintellix, Pristiq, Fluvoxamine.  Underwent 6 months of ketamine infusions. Advised to discontinue all meds due to inefficacy in November 2021.  Weaned off Fluvoxamine by psychiatrist over 6 weeks-- last dose ~December 10, 2021.  Severe ongoing withdrawal.   February 2021  Started on 300mg Gabapentin for anxiety, restless legs, insomnia, and wide spread body pain from withdrawal.  Began Gabapentin taper to 200mg on 8/5/2022. Worsened withdrawal symptoms.  Also began 2000mg of L-Tryptophan for depression/AD withdrawal, 2400mg of N Acetyl Cysteine for OCD and 300mg of Magnesium for depression.  Began L-Tryptophan taper from 2000mg to 1500mg on 8/14/2022. Completed l-tryptophan and NAC taper on 8/29/2022. 

Current Meds: 15mg of Buspirone twice a day (morning and night since 2020), 5 mg Buspirone at midday (Started taper of midday dose from 15mg to 5 mg in September 2023) , 200mg of gabapentin at night (Since August 2022), 1mg of alprazolam at night (Started at 0.25mg in Jan 2023 and gradually upped to 1-2mg three times a week until end of 11/2023--reinstated 1mg daily on 12/1/2023), 80mg propranolol in the morning, 10mg Zyrtec in the morning, birth control pills Current Supplements: 300 mg of magnesium citrate midday, 1000mg of Fish Oil in the morning, 1mg melatonin at night

 

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  • Administrator

Please work with your therapist on techniques to manage your troubling thoughts, if you do not want to rely on drugs. 

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

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  • 2 weeks later...

@Altostrata I have been off all supplements except for the magnesium, fish oil, and a probiotic for about eight days. Felt slightly better until I hit a major wave yesterday. Have not slept in over 36 hours and am consumed with panic, anxiety, and intrusive thoughts. The full body shaking still happens every morning between 1.5 and four hours after eating breakfast and is accompanied by heart palpitations and my body turning ice cold. This morning at 4am my heart rate was 132bpm. I made an appointment with an Endocrinologist on 9/27 to be tested for reactive hypoglycemia. I can barely tolerate food and the diarrhea has returned. Whenever I try to rest and start to drift off I am jolted awake in absolute terror. Tomorrow marks nine months in withdrawal. 

1995  Prozac    1996  Prozac and Paxil    1997  Celexa   1998-2018  Cymbalta 60-120mg-- failed taper and restarted at 20mg after development of intense rage--finally able to taper off in late 2018    2017-2021  Clonazepam 0.5mg BID--discontinued over 4 weeks in April 2021 resulting in severe benzo withdrawal for 5 months maybe still ongoing at time of AD rapid taper in Dec 2021

2018-2019  Bupropion    *Have been polydrugged since 1995 with a variety of benzos, sleeping pills, anxioltyics, and ADs.  Too many to list or remember. Never properly tapered by doctor before switching medicines* 2020  Started on Buspirone 15mg three times a day    2020-2021   Antidepressant was changed three times: Trintellix, Pristiq, Fluvoxamine.  Underwent 6 months of ketamine infusions. Advised to discontinue all meds due to inefficacy in November 2021.  Weaned off Fluvoxamine by psychiatrist over 6 weeks-- last dose ~December 10, 2021.  Severe ongoing withdrawal.   February 2021  Started on 300mg Gabapentin for anxiety, restless legs, insomnia, and wide spread body pain from withdrawal.  Began Gabapentin taper to 200mg on 8/5/2022. Worsened withdrawal symptoms.  Also began 2000mg of L-Tryptophan for depression/AD withdrawal, 2400mg of N Acetyl Cysteine for OCD and 300mg of Magnesium for depression.  Began L-Tryptophan taper from 2000mg to 1500mg on 8/14/2022. Completed l-tryptophan and NAC taper on 8/29/2022. 

Current Meds: 15mg of Buspirone twice a day (morning and night since 2020), 5 mg Buspirone at midday (Started taper of midday dose from 15mg to 5 mg in September 2023) , 200mg of gabapentin at night (Since August 2022), 1mg of alprazolam at night (Started at 0.25mg in Jan 2023 and gradually upped to 1-2mg three times a week until end of 11/2023--reinstated 1mg daily on 12/1/2023), 80mg propranolol in the morning, 10mg Zyrtec in the morning, birth control pills Current Supplements: 300 mg of magnesium citrate midday, 1000mg of Fish Oil in the morning, 1mg melatonin at night

 

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  • Administrator

What times o'clock do you take your drugs, with their dosages? Have you changed your drug schedule lately, or skipped any doses?

 

8 hours ago, EttaLouWho said:

The full body shaking still happens every morning between 1.5 and four hours after eating breakfast and is accompanied by heart palpitations and my body turning ice cold. This morning at 4am my heart rate was 132bpm.

 

Does this occur before or after you take your drugs?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

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6:00am: 50mg metoprolol ER, 15mg of buspirone, 1000 mg of fish oil, 100mg magnesium, probiotic, 10mg Zyrtec

 

~12:30pm: 15mg buspirone, 100mg magnesium

 

9:00pm: 15mg of buspirone, 25mg diphenhydramine, 200mg gabapentin, birth control pill, 1000 mg fish oil

 

I have not skipped any doses or changed my drug schedule in any way. The shaking episodes occur 1.5-4 hours after taking my morning meds and eating breakfast and have been happening for several months. 

1995  Prozac    1996  Prozac and Paxil    1997  Celexa   1998-2018  Cymbalta 60-120mg-- failed taper and restarted at 20mg after development of intense rage--finally able to taper off in late 2018    2017-2021  Clonazepam 0.5mg BID--discontinued over 4 weeks in April 2021 resulting in severe benzo withdrawal for 5 months maybe still ongoing at time of AD rapid taper in Dec 2021

2018-2019  Bupropion    *Have been polydrugged since 1995 with a variety of benzos, sleeping pills, anxioltyics, and ADs.  Too many to list or remember. Never properly tapered by doctor before switching medicines* 2020  Started on Buspirone 15mg three times a day    2020-2021   Antidepressant was changed three times: Trintellix, Pristiq, Fluvoxamine.  Underwent 6 months of ketamine infusions. Advised to discontinue all meds due to inefficacy in November 2021.  Weaned off Fluvoxamine by psychiatrist over 6 weeks-- last dose ~December 10, 2021.  Severe ongoing withdrawal.   February 2021  Started on 300mg Gabapentin for anxiety, restless legs, insomnia, and wide spread body pain from withdrawal.  Began Gabapentin taper to 200mg on 8/5/2022. Worsened withdrawal symptoms.  Also began 2000mg of L-Tryptophan for depression/AD withdrawal, 2400mg of N Acetyl Cysteine for OCD and 300mg of Magnesium for depression.  Began L-Tryptophan taper from 2000mg to 1500mg on 8/14/2022. Completed l-tryptophan and NAC taper on 8/29/2022. 

Current Meds: 15mg of Buspirone twice a day (morning and night since 2020), 5 mg Buspirone at midday (Started taper of midday dose from 15mg to 5 mg in September 2023) , 200mg of gabapentin at night (Since August 2022), 1mg of alprazolam at night (Started at 0.25mg in Jan 2023 and gradually upped to 1-2mg three times a week until end of 11/2023--reinstated 1mg daily on 12/1/2023), 80mg propranolol in the morning, 10mg Zyrtec in the morning, birth control pills Current Supplements: 300 mg of magnesium citrate midday, 1000mg of Fish Oil in the morning, 1mg melatonin at night

 

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  • Administrator
7 minutes ago, EttaLouWho said:

6:00am: 50mg metoprolol ER, 15mg of buspirone, 1000 mg of fish oil, 100mg magnesium, probiotic, 10mg Zyrtec

 

~12:30pm: 15mg buspirone, 100mg magnesium

 

9:00pm: 15mg of buspirone, 25mg diphenhydramine, 200mg gabapentin, birth control pill, 1000 mg fish oil

 

Why are you taking metoprolol, when did you start it? Why do you take it in the morning? How long have you been taking diphenhydramine?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

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I take the metoprolol because I have had sinus tachycardia with palpitations my whole life. Usually not to the extent that I am experiencing it now. On bad days now my heart rate gets to over 130 while resting. I take it in the morning because my symptoms usually show up during the day and that was how I was instructed to take it. I have been on some sort of a beta blocker for this issue since about 2012. 
 

I have taken diphenhydramine at night for upwards of a decade. 

1995  Prozac    1996  Prozac and Paxil    1997  Celexa   1998-2018  Cymbalta 60-120mg-- failed taper and restarted at 20mg after development of intense rage--finally able to taper off in late 2018    2017-2021  Clonazepam 0.5mg BID--discontinued over 4 weeks in April 2021 resulting in severe benzo withdrawal for 5 months maybe still ongoing at time of AD rapid taper in Dec 2021

2018-2019  Bupropion    *Have been polydrugged since 1995 with a variety of benzos, sleeping pills, anxioltyics, and ADs.  Too many to list or remember. Never properly tapered by doctor before switching medicines* 2020  Started on Buspirone 15mg three times a day    2020-2021   Antidepressant was changed three times: Trintellix, Pristiq, Fluvoxamine.  Underwent 6 months of ketamine infusions. Advised to discontinue all meds due to inefficacy in November 2021.  Weaned off Fluvoxamine by psychiatrist over 6 weeks-- last dose ~December 10, 2021.  Severe ongoing withdrawal.   February 2021  Started on 300mg Gabapentin for anxiety, restless legs, insomnia, and wide spread body pain from withdrawal.  Began Gabapentin taper to 200mg on 8/5/2022. Worsened withdrawal symptoms.  Also began 2000mg of L-Tryptophan for depression/AD withdrawal, 2400mg of N Acetyl Cysteine for OCD and 300mg of Magnesium for depression.  Began L-Tryptophan taper from 2000mg to 1500mg on 8/14/2022. Completed l-tryptophan and NAC taper on 8/29/2022. 

Current Meds: 15mg of Buspirone twice a day (morning and night since 2020), 5 mg Buspirone at midday (Started taper of midday dose from 15mg to 5 mg in September 2023) , 200mg of gabapentin at night (Since August 2022), 1mg of alprazolam at night (Started at 0.25mg in Jan 2023 and gradually upped to 1-2mg three times a week until end of 11/2023--reinstated 1mg daily on 12/1/2023), 80mg propranolol in the morning, 10mg Zyrtec in the morning, birth control pills Current Supplements: 300 mg of magnesium citrate midday, 1000mg of Fish Oil in the morning, 1mg melatonin at night

 

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