Ewa: She saved my life

[BooBoo19]

@Phoenixmama Hello Phoenix mama, I am 26 months following a cold turkey of antidepressants and I have not healed yet, far from it unfortunately.  I know the longer it goes on we start doubting ourselves but some of us just take time, a very, very  long time.😄

[Phoenixmama]

@BooBoo19 hiiii ty , idk why all the reasurrance from everyone helps me so much ty ty ty 🌞

[leahbean]

8 hours ago, Ewa said:

Hello leahbean 

Your question today made me finally called my ex doctor for my medical records so I can update my drug history here, so thank you for asking. Over 20 years I was prescribed different antidepressants (poop out/tolerance) always one at the time. On was on Cymbalta for about 4 years (I just ordered my records today, so as soon I get them I will update here) I don’t remember exactly but it was the drug I cold turkey from 60mg. 
My original condition was depression actually it was clinical depression but I was absolutely not clinically depressed however I was low in mood (homesick, new country, miss my friends and family, worked nights and went to school during day, I overextended myself) I was not sucidle at all. 
I am doing really well 😊 no trace of depression left. 
My husband did everything from shopping to preparing meals, mostly it was a lot of take outs, taking care of our daughter and me. We had cleaning lady at that time, since I was not able to do that. 
Take care 

 

Ewa

Thank you so much for responding!  I have two children at home and have run into big trouble with my taper.  How did you and your husband explain your experience to your daughter?  What advice would your husband have for other caregivers?  
 

I’m scared to emotionally damage my children and husband by continuing to try to quit Lexapro.  I feel fairly non functional as it is!  
 

thank you for any further advice…. Feels like so many people on this site going through this are either single or no children still living at home.  

[Ewa]

On 3/22/2023 at 8:11 PM, leahbean said:

Thank you so much for responding!  I have two children at home and have run into big trouble with my taper.  How did you and your husband explain your experience to your daughter?  What advice would your husband have for other caregivers?  
 

I’m scared to emotionally damage my children and husband by continuing to try to quit Lexapro.  I feel fairly non functional as it is!  
 

thank you for any further advice…. Feels like so many people on this site going through this are either single or no children still living at home.  

Hello leahbean

I asked my husband if he would write response to the question about advice for caregivers and he agreed, and what we/he said to our daughter, so I’m going to past he’s response here. 
 

“I would say the caregivers job can be broken down into three areas.

First is patience. You have to have patience with the person going through the hard time. You really have to try to understand what’s going on and how you can help if there is anything you can do because a lot of times there isn’t.  Realize that they are suffering, so try not to take things personally, though that is hard.

The second is support. You just have to support them as best you can whatever that means….  preparing meals or getting them some tea, doing laundry, or even encouraging them to take a bath. They need time to heal so you just need to give them the feeling that it’s OK for them to heal. 

And finally, I would say, the third thing is distraction. If there is anything you can do to help get their mind off of what’s happening to them that is helpful. Whether it’s re-watching an old movie they love or maybe reading a book that might be interesting.  Everyone is different and has different needs so you simply have to try to understand what they need to help get through the day.

My wife, for example, was very diligent about reading anything she could to try to understand her situation. She read many books, watched online videos of people who have experienced similar situation’s, and she also absorbed videos by professionals, who had understanding of what was really going on.

 

When it comes to kids, I would say it’s important to let them know that their parent is going through something that’s not their fault. It’s not the parents fault and it’s not the kids fault. It’s important to be honest and say that the prescription drugs which we thought would help actually ended up harming the parent. Because there are no studies about the impact of long-term use.  It’s important to say also that we don’t know how long it will take to get better or what it will be like in the meantime, 

It’s important that they know the parents are trying to find a way for the one parent to get better. It just might take time. 

I always encouraged our daughter to consistently, say good night and try to let her understand the situation without labeling it. In the meantime, understand that they might create some coping mechanisms. Maybe they will withdraw into a computer game like Minecraft and they will be very sensitive to anything the parents say. They might lock the door to the room and that might be a protective mechanism so you have to also understand the child and what support they need. So the same three things you need to do for a patient you need to do with the kid. Have patience, support them, and offer some distraction.” 
 

I have nothing to add to what my husband wrote, I’m so thankful to him for doing exactly what he wrote. 
 

Take care leahbean

 

with love 

 

Ewa

[leahbean]

@Ewa Oh my goodness, thank you so much for this.  That your husband was willing to answer this directly means so much.  Thank you to both of you!  

[Ewa]

On 3/27/2023 at 9:41 AM, leahbean said:

@Ewa Oh my goodness, thank you so much for this.  That your husband was willing to answer this directly means so much.  Thank you to both of you!  

You very much welcome leahbean 😊

I just updated my drug history.

Take care 

Ewa

[Ryder]

Thanks for the writeup Ewa.

 

Ryder.

[Darabella]

Wow Ewa, woman like you so happy for you! Want to cheer you on and say hello. Big worry cycle thoughts in my head now. When feel better bit, I am happy, but then something always happen to make me worry and think, it will be ended! I very scare of sickness in all this. Did you get bugs or small sick and still get better? I am scare that if get sick, too much happen. So sad! 

 

Anyway Ewa is making me so have hope. 

[SSRIHelp]

Ewa, your post gives me hope that I may one day feel normal too. I noticed you described many gut issues that I experience as well. Did you ever have a diagnosis? I was recently diagnosed with gastroparesis and I am terrified that I am stuck with this disease forever now. However, the problems only occured after stopping Paxil and switching to Celexa, so I feel this has to be withdrawal related.

[peaceandlove]

Hello, how long did your intrusive thoughts last?
 

I’m 15 months from my adverse reaction & I still have them. It’s like my mind is obsessed with harmful, scary things. It’s my most concerning symptom. & how did you deal with them

[Gardengonewild]

Don't tell your dr or anyone else about them. I'm permanently injured bc I tried to get help for it not knowing it was wd. 

[keogh08]

On 8/18/2023 at 5:37 PM, peaceandlove said:

Hello, how long did your intrusive thoughts last?
 

I’m 15 months from my adverse reaction & I still have them. It’s like my mind is obsessed with harmful, scary things. It’s my most concerning symptom. & how did you deal with them

I’m 4 years out from my adverse reaction to a couple of doses. 
 

Believe me when I tell you this calms down. 

 

It was my most concerning symptoms also especially as a mother. 

 

The law of distraction worked best for me, if you find them bothersome do something, anything to keep busy. They can disappear as quickly as they came. 
 

 

[Ewa]

On 7/1/2023 at 5:21 PM, Darabella said:

Wow Ewa, woman like you so happy for you! Want to cheer you on and say hello. Big worry cycle thoughts in my head now. When feel better bit, I am happy, but then something always happen to make me worry and think, it will be ended! I very scare of sickness in all this. Did you get bugs or small sick and still get better? I am scare that if get sick, too much happen. So sad! 

 

Anyway Ewa is making me so have hope. 

Hello Darabella, 

I had intrusive thoughts very badly while in withdrawal but they are gone and I don’t have them anymore. Also I’m not afraid or scared of getting sick, I’m pretty healthy person now I don’t take any prescription drugs not even supplements. I had a stomach flu 2 months ago but I recovered very quickly. 
Try not to live in fear of getting sick but I know it’s hard while in withdrawal. Wish you full recovery and thank you for your kind words. 
Take care 

Ewa

[Ewa]

On 8/8/2023 at 2:45 PM, SSRIHelp said:

Ewa, your post gives me hope that I may one day feel normal too. I noticed you described many gut issues that I experience as well. Did you ever have a diagnosis? I was recently diagnosed with gastroparesis and I am terrified that I am stuck with this disease forever now. However, the problems only occured after stopping Paxil and switching to Celexa, so I feel this has to be withdrawal related.

Hello SSRIHelp,

Yes I had severe GI issues while in withdrawal for years, my gut was burning, churning, twisting, growling, no appetite I forced myself to eat. Ones I knew what happened to me that I’m in withdrawal I never once went to doctor, and I’m talking any kind of doctor. 
My gut is healthy now I have no issues with it, I eat healthy whole food diet, no fast food no processed food. 
Last year while in Mexico I did my labs (blood, urine) they are all good.

I wish you all the best and hope your gut is feeling better.

You will feel normal again it is absolutely possible. 
Take care 

 

Ewa 

[Ewa]

On 8/18/2023 at 11:37 AM, peaceandlove said:

Hello, how long did your intrusive thoughts last?
 

I’m 15 months from my adverse reaction & I still have them. It’s like my mind is obsessed with harmful, scary things. It’s my most concerning symptom. & how did you deal with them

Hello peaceandlove,

About 3 years, I red and I research all subjects mentioned in my story, I had to, that was my way surviving, I had to learn so I could understand my own pain my own trauma and my mothers trauma. I was searching for the truth no matter where it led me. 
I wish you full recovery take care. 
The thoughts will pass. 
 

Ewa

[Ewa]

Hello everyone 🤗

It has been almost one year since I have posted my success story. I just want to do little update to let you know how I’m doing. 
I’m doing well, I have rich range of my emotions, I can self regulate pretty well, I use my emotions as a guide, I’m taking good care of my body as in it resides my spirit my essence. I sleep well I eat well (whole foods) I’m not following any specific diet (no fast food, no processed food). 
I have been traveling by myself for almost two months, went to Poland and Italy. In Poland I spent much of time with my family, my father had his 85 birthday I was so thankful to be there with him (5 years passed since I saw him last time). I visited with my high school friends and I did some hiking in gorgeous Tatra mountains. I visited my friend’s parents in Rzeszow and also stay few days in Kraków. I stayed in Italy for one week in beautiful seaside town Rimini. While there I attended Gregg Braden and Bruce Lipton two day event. For one day I went to San Marino. 
In the nutshell I had a wonderful time that I’m very grateful for. While in withdrawal I could not comprehend that I would be able to do all this. I want to tell you it is absolutely possible. Please give yourself time to heal, please give yourself grace if you can, I know it is so hard to do while in suffering. 
Recovery is possible, healing is possible.

With love to all of you 

 

Ewa

 

Ps. Photo taken in Rimini September 2023

[getofflex]

Thank you for your beautiful and heartfelt success story!  You had a double whammy - you were dealing with withdrawal as well as trauma.  You are a bright shining light.  

[Giuly88]

Hi Ewa, I read through your story. Well done for your strength and perseverance.

 

Did you experience muscle spasms and jerks in your upper body?

 

This is what I’m going through at the moment.

 

 

[Ewa]

On 12/12/2023 at 6:19 AM, Giuly88 said:

Hi Ewa, I read through your story. Well done for your strength and perseverance.

 

Did you experience muscle spasms and jerks in your upper body?

 

This is what I’m going through at the moment.

 

 

Hello Giuly88

Thank you for your kind words. 
I did not have spasm or jerks, my whole body was very stiff and tens. 
I’m sorry you are going through this, your body and CNS needs time to heal, we can heal and recover. 
Wishing you full recovery 💞

[Ewa]

On 11/27/2023 at 10:59 AM, getofflex said:

Thank you for your beautiful and heartfelt success story!  You had a double whammy - you were dealing with withdrawal as well as trauma.  You are a bright shining light.  

Thank you getofflex ✨💞

[Giuly88]

16 hours ago, Ewa said:

Hello Giuly88

Thank you for your kind words. 
I did not have spasm or jerks, my whole body was very stiff and tens. 
I’m sorry you are going through this, your body and CNS needs time to heal, we can heal and recover. 
Wishing you full recovery 💞

Thank you Ewa ❤️

[Ewa]

Hello everyone, just yesterday I had my first interview, about my journey of recovery, with Angie Peacock. It is posted on her Utube channel under her name. 
Wishing you all full recovery ✨💞✨

[DaBro]

Excellent podcast Ewa. Aside from being an accurate story about a journey through antidepressants and WD.

 

it also helped me shift from blaming myself for starting the journey to congratulating myself for navigating the journey to where I am now. The 

[Ewa]

1 hour ago, DaBro said:

Excellent podcast Ewa. Aside from being an accurate story about a journey through antidepressants and WD.

 

it also helped me shift from blaming myself for starting the journey to congratulating myself for navigating the journey to where I am now. The 

Thank you DaBro, 

I’m very glad you came to this realization it is very accurate one ✨💞 I blamed myself too while being in it (for many things) until I stopped. 
Wishing you full recovery my friend ✨