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Apathy, anhedonia, emotional numbness, emotional anesthesia


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1 hour ago, 00ColdTurkey said:

Hey, I'm writing this because I'm both curious and a little desperate. Actually, very desperate. I'm scared I ruined myself. 

 

I'm curious if anyone's taken a supplement and became more numb as a result? If so, did that numbness ease off a little afterwards? 

 

You could've been numb already or someone who wasn't numb, but became numb. I just want to find out if anyone did take a supplement and it caused them to become numb, did it fade off eventually? 

 

Hope this makes sense. My head feels like it's been replaced by a robots. I feel nothing again... I was recovering as well... 😨

 

14 minutes ago, Roserdl said:

What did you take?  It may not have been the supplement,  you may just be back in a wave.  Don't freak out too much.  Just keep going and your brain will heal. I have seen this being induced by all sorts of substances besides antidepressants and yes, people report it goes away.  

 

Zoloft on an off since 30s with no issues. On and off for years  long periods 25 to 150 mg.  75 average dose.  (Current age 50).

Risperdal 1 month. 2018.  Various trials of other drugs but Never for more than couple of weeks due to poor tolerance and all over 12 years ago.  Script for seldom used klonopin.  Would take 1 month at most.  Off for years

January 2021 went off Zoloft 25 mg and supplemented with Fish Oil/L Theanine/L Tryptophan to keep up Serotonin level

zoloft taper 100 t0 25mg over one year. concerns of vision heart side effects jumped at 25

went off in january 

Off for three weeks, went back on at 25 mg after depression symptoms came back

February 12 2022- either med reaction/serotonin toxicity with Zoloft mix other serotonin natural supplements

February 16 - 21 2022 (two doses of Zoloft on advice to restart, one 25mg, one 12.5mg - nausea

Supplements. Fish oil magnesium mct oil cytokine suppress multi vitamin nac modified keto and daily walks

Over next 2 months re instated  Zoloft to 65mg with significant partial improvements steady sleep. 

June 7 Resume taper 62.5 on  6/21 60mg 7/9 57.5mg 7/24 54 mg

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I don't know what happened to the quote, as the text got deleted. But thanks so much for answering! Right now I can't stop obsessing. So any news that people have recovered from any kind of supplement is good news. 

 

It's confusing. The CBD products over here don't have THC (or barely any) in it. So I thought I would be safe. I unknowingly took 20mg CBD in these energy drinks. The first two didn't do anything. 

 

Then the third product I had did. I've been dissociated, numb, insomniac since. It's been a week. Maybe it's too soon to worry. But I just can't help it. 🥹🥹

1 hour ago, Roserdl said:

 

Riseridone (dose unknown) 2010 (no approximate end, short-term use), Aspergers. Tapered. Fluxoetine 10mg 13/14. Direct switch to -- Citalopram 2014/14. Quetiapine 2014/14. 1 week. (Cold turkey, advised by NHS). 

Risperidone, 20th March 2016, cold turkey April 10th, 2016 Zoloft, April, 2016, 25mg, increased to 50mg in May, increased to 100mg in late 2016, decreased to 50mg, September 2019(Accidentally)weaned myself off. Reinstated Zoloft 50mg for 3 days - March 23rd to 26th. Early 2021 (changed brand of Zoloft. Tapered down. Med free since 11th February. Waiting to see if any windows happen). Supplements (occasionally l theanine 300mg, trialing CBD) Took a small light dab of powder, barely a compound. Deciding to wait and see what happens afterwards, not wanting to reinstate now. 

 

Took a small dose of L-Theanine (under 20mg). Negative reaction included: sweating, mania, head pressure, head tingling, worse insomnia. Not touching anything ever again. 

 

Anhedonic since March 2020!

Using a THC free edible on the 5th June ruined everything. Insomnia, no appetite, numbness, DP/DR.

 

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I know it's scary.  It sounds like you were making progress and you will again.

 

At most you have set yourself back.  I understand the freak out but you still will heal.  I get it.  I reinstated with very mixed results and now getting ready for a microtaper.  It had really mixed results.  It's not a perfect process. Lots of people on these boards made plenty of mistakes sometimes on multiple drugs and get better.   Let it clear your system and allow time to further stabalize. You'll get there.  Remember you were getting out of it before you will again.  Hang in there and hugs.  You can pm me if you need support.

 

Reddit pot boards are full of people healed from it.  I would advise staying off forums though when you are spiraling.

Zoloft on an off since 30s with no issues. On and off for years  long periods 25 to 150 mg.  75 average dose.  (Current age 50).

Risperdal 1 month. 2018.  Various trials of other drugs but Never for more than couple of weeks due to poor tolerance and all over 12 years ago.  Script for seldom used klonopin.  Would take 1 month at most.  Off for years

January 2021 went off Zoloft 25 mg and supplemented with Fish Oil/L Theanine/L Tryptophan to keep up Serotonin level

zoloft taper 100 t0 25mg over one year. concerns of vision heart side effects jumped at 25

went off in january 

Off for three weeks, went back on at 25 mg after depression symptoms came back

February 12 2022- either med reaction/serotonin toxicity with Zoloft mix other serotonin natural supplements

February 16 - 21 2022 (two doses of Zoloft on advice to restart, one 25mg, one 12.5mg - nausea

Supplements. Fish oil magnesium mct oil cytokine suppress multi vitamin nac modified keto and daily walks

Over next 2 months re instated  Zoloft to 65mg with significant partial improvements steady sleep. 

June 7 Resume taper 62.5 on  6/21 60mg 7/9 57.5mg 7/24 54 mg

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  • 3 weeks later...
On 6/1/2022 at 10:30 PM, Kaervin said:

Just wanted to chime in on this topic. The worst form of anhedonia I had was during my benzo usage and withdrawals. When I got a window, it went completely away and I felt connected to those I loved and even nature. Fall has always been my favorite time of year, and it was good to feel that excitement again. 

 

Unfortunately I made the mistake of starting an AD about 16 months into my recovery during a particularly brutal wave. And while I have been relatively stable these past 10 years, nothing as felt as good as those windows i had during my time med free. Especially that autumn of 2011, a memory I will forever cherish. 

 

Withdrawal anhedonia was a lot worse (for me at least) than medication induced anhedonia. That said, I feel like I missed out on truly appreciating the good things that have happened in my life these past 10 years because of the emotional numbness from ADs. I am just waiting for "autumn to return" and I know it will once I finally get off sertraline and get through withdrawal. 

 

One consideration though, it is important to always get a thorough check up by a doctor. A fellow member of my benzo forum was over 2 years into recovery and was unable to feel feelings or happiness. She was waiting for withdrawal to take its course. By some chance some a member suggested she get tested for Lymes. Sure enough she had it, got treatment and improved from there.

 

If your anhedonia is from withdrawal/med usage it will most likely go away with time. It is still important to rule out other possibilities. 

 

You stayed on for 10 years?  Why didn't you taper?

Zoloft on an off since 30s with no issues. On and off for years  long periods 25 to 150 mg.  75 average dose.  (Current age 50).

Risperdal 1 month. 2018.  Various trials of other drugs but Never for more than couple of weeks due to poor tolerance and all over 12 years ago.  Script for seldom used klonopin.  Would take 1 month at most.  Off for years

January 2021 went off Zoloft 25 mg and supplemented with Fish Oil/L Theanine/L Tryptophan to keep up Serotonin level

zoloft taper 100 t0 25mg over one year. concerns of vision heart side effects jumped at 25

went off in january 

Off for three weeks, went back on at 25 mg after depression symptoms came back

February 12 2022- either med reaction/serotonin toxicity with Zoloft mix other serotonin natural supplements

February 16 - 21 2022 (two doses of Zoloft on advice to restart, one 25mg, one 12.5mg - nausea

Supplements. Fish oil magnesium mct oil cytokine suppress multi vitamin nac modified keto and daily walks

Over next 2 months re instated  Zoloft to 65mg with significant partial improvements steady sleep. 

June 7 Resume taper 62.5 on  6/21 60mg 7/9 57.5mg 7/24 54 mg

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On 6/27/2022 at 1:16 PM, Roserdl said:

You stayed on for 10 years?  Why didn't you taper?

Short answer is that I was so exhausted from my benzo recovery that I didn't have it in me to immediately begin another withdrawal. There was a ptsd of sorts as well.

 

Unfortunately I kept putting my withdrawal off as I wasn't experiencing any unbearable side effects while on ADs. However, from 2016 onwards I could feel my detachment growing as well as more prominent side effects. As of now I am about 80% off of my max dose. Things are once again getting difficult but I am determined to see this through.

2008: March, Klonopin .5 mg to 1 mg

2009: Dec, CT Klonopin

2010: full year heavy alcohol use

2011: Jan - withdrawals start

2012: Apr- bad wave, start zoloft 50

2014 to 2020: Switch ADs

Sertraline 100mgs >Lexapro 20 mgs>Prozac 20 mgs >Lexapro 20

2021: Sertraline 25 mgs

2022: Mar. Cut dose down to 12.5

End of May, starting to crash physically/mentally.

 

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 1/12/2022 at 7:04 PM, JesusSavemefromWD said:

It’s easy for docs to claim ADs are safe cause they are not them taking these poisons. I wish I could force down their throat Zoloft and have them CT and then again …. Excuse my anger but I think it’s justified taking into account how many times I asked doctors how safe these drugs are and never ever a single warning was given to me about potential long term severe side effects. I wouldn’t have touched these poisons if I was even told there is 1% change of severe side effects. In fact I was discouraged to read the side effects in leaflet to avoid scaring myself off for no reason. I was so stupid to listen to this advice ….

There a lot of doctors who take Ads 

I don’t remember everything but I tray

2019 3-4 months citalopram (tiered from medication 

2019 3-4 month Escitalopram (same as citalopram)

2019-03/2020 Effexor ( CT because I was psychotic on this medication )

08/2020 Risperdal 4mg 1 week than taper to 2Mg 09/2020 1mg Risperdal + Effexor 37,5 till April CT in Psyward by the doctors

April 2021 relapse and get 20 mg Abilify ( i think it was WD not relapse) 

May 2021 CT Abilify 

Hospital : try a lot of Medication Medication Sep2021: 150 mg sertralin and 50mg Quentiapin 

tapered in hospital 3 month 0 mg sertralin and 50 mg quentiapin 

March 2022 CT Quentiapin 

Current medication 0

 

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6 hours ago, Quittingquentiapin said:

There a lot of doctors who take Ads 

And my one just happened to get off them safely 🤦 doesn't help the matter.

10 years on various anti-depressants

5 years Effexor xr

tappered of 150mg in 6 months

nothing for two weeks

Reinstated 15 beads for 50 days

Tappered off then clean 2-3months

gradually went back up to 13 mg 3 years

bridged fluoxetine 10mg

2 week tapper

1 year clean

reinstated 5ml dispersed fluroxatine for 6months

 

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I found these on YT the other day and found them quite interesting and useful. 

History of depression and anxiety. Symptoms of PTSD.

1998-1999 Venlafaxine 2006-2007 Prozac. 2013-15 Sertraline 50mg. 2015 cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg. 2015-2021 Citalopram 20mg (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019.

01/2021 Dropped from 20mg to 10mg, back up to 20mg til June.

25/6/21 stopped CT. Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my serotonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp.
11/7/21 Stopped 5htp with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg.  

16/7/21 Reinstated cit at 1mg.

2/8/21 Increased dose to 2mg. 
28/11/21 10% reduction to 1.8mg.

8/12/21 2mg 6/1/22 1.8mg 10/2/22 1.6mg 13/5/22 1.5mg 4/6/22 1.55mg 4/7/22 1.4mg 4/8/22 1.25mg

Multiple unsuccessful previous attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle. Other medications; kliovance (HRT) Other supplements; magnesium glycinate, calcium, B12, vitD and vegan omega3. I use valerian and lemon balm tea for anxiety relief

Completely OFF booze (since 6/11/21) and caffeine (since July 21) now. Main symptoms; crushing depression, anhedonia/emotional anesthesia, irritability, rage, anxiety/fear, cognitive fog, inability to focus, restlessness and some insomnia

 

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Is it normal to have Windows and waves with anhedonia and emotional numbness?

 

I was feeling a little better, and could to a small extent Feel a little excited and content. 
 

Not on any way like before, but it was something. 
 

Then i suddenly got really bad again. My brain feels like it is fried and not functioning at all. 
 

My anhedonia and numbness is worse that ever. 
 

Is it a wave or Did i eat or do something to make it worse? 

June-July -21 Zyprexa 2.5-7.5 mg 

July -21 Mianserin 20 mg four days

July-Aug -21 Valium 30 mg a day, tapred, return of symptoms 

Aug-Oct -21 Oxazepam Tapred from 10 mg x 3 to zero

Dec-Jan -21/22 On and off mirtazapine 15 mg. Kindling reaction?

March 8.-19. - Zopiclone 7.5 mg to combat insomnia 

March 20 - 5 mg valium because of akathisia and panic 

April 3. - 5 mg x 2

 

 
 

 

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8 hours ago, Sofa said:

Is it normal to have Windows and waves with anhedonia and emotional numbness?

 

I was feeling a little better, and could to a small extent Feel a little excited and content. 
 

Not on any way like before, but it was something. 
 

Then i suddenly got really bad again. My brain feels like it is fried and not functioning at all. 
 

My anhedonia and numbness is worse that ever. 
 

Is it a wave or Did i eat or do something to make it worse? 

HI Sofa, 

I Feel exactly as you do its like my brain is Fried or on fire and i too switch between a little normal to numb. I also sleep 8 hours but i dont sleep deep which makes it even harder. Whats normal i Our cases? Stay strong! 

Started Venlafaxine around  2007-2008  for around 4,5-5 years 70mg

                                                   ca .2012  Taper as doctors advise 2 weeks skip a day and stop

                                                   7 -8 later months total breakdown after sruggling a lot Hospitalized

                                                   and started on Cipralex.

Taper as doctors advise: Mai 2018  from 20 to 10 mg escitalopram to zero in one Month.

 

supplements

Magnesium citrate 600 mg

Omega 3  2000 mg

vitamin D3 sometimes

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Does Anyone else also else also experience this strange thing?

 

I Feel like there is no connection between my head and my body. 

I generelt am really emotionally flat, but Sometimes i can Feel hint of an emotion, but only in my body. 

 

I cant feel the same emotion in my head. My head still feels empty and dense/dark. 

 

My body shows signs of anger or annoyance f.ex., but my head is still in empty/neutral mode with no feelings/sensations. 

 

Sometimes this means i struggle to understand what the emotions in my body are. I also struggle with other sensations like hunger. 

 

There is just no connection. 

 

Has Anyone else experienced something similar? Does it get better?

June-July -21 Zyprexa 2.5-7.5 mg 

July -21 Mianserin 20 mg four days

July-Aug -21 Valium 30 mg a day, tapred, return of symptoms 

Aug-Oct -21 Oxazepam Tapred from 10 mg x 3 to zero

Dec-Jan -21/22 On and off mirtazapine 15 mg. Kindling reaction?

March 8.-19. - Zopiclone 7.5 mg to combat insomnia 

March 20 - 5 mg valium because of akathisia and panic 

April 3. - 5 mg x 2

 

 
 

 

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Hi @Sofa

 

I don't have anhedonia myself, my son does.  So, I'm aware of this condition 'from the outside' and can understand in a conceptual way how devastating it must be.  So, firstly, I just want to say that your distress is real - this is an extremely difficult situation to find yourself in and I am so sorry that you are going through this.

 

I came to this thread to post a question about whether other people with anhedonia have found that they can access the benefits of meditation practice, but I came across your post and I'd like to offer you a response. 

 

I practice Buddhist meditation and in Buddhist practice it is well known that emotions are generated/felt by the body.  In meditation we spend a lot of time tuning into what is happening in our bodies, rather than our heads.  The body-sense tells us more truthfully about what we're feeling.  If we rely only on what is going on in our head we tend to get caught up in stories (blame, shame, wishing etc).  The body-sense is thought to provide a purer and more essential view of what is going on with us.  In meditation, we sit gently with the body-feeling and hold it with care and openness and see if we can understand it.

 

So, my point is that maybe your realisation that you can feel emotions in your body may be helpful if you can find a way to relate to them gently and openly.  This is just a suggestion from my practice.  Not having anhedonia myself means that I don't know how this will work for you.  Also, be aware that, for some people, the body doesn't feel like a safe place.  If this is true for you, then a more dynamic practice like yoga may be more helpful.  But whatever you do, be gentle with yourself - you're going through a difficult time.

 

I fully acknowledge the pain of your situation.  Not being able to feel emotion in your head is sh*t and I don't mean to deny this in any way.  But, experience on this site shows that nervous systems heal.  What I'm suggesting is offered with the hope that it might help you to cope whilst your repair systems sort out the important stuff.

 

I hope this is helpful and I hope someone with direct experience of what you are describing is able to help you too.

 

Wishing you comfort.

 

Hilly x

 

 

 

My son's drug history:

  • August 2020 Citalopram 30mg
  • October 2020 suicide attempt
  • November 2020 Citalopram 60mg (suicidality increased)
  • January 2021 Duloxetine 60mg
  • May 2021 anhedonia peaked
  • August-September 2021 Duloxetine 90mg + Aripiprazole 5mg added to augment
  • End of October 2021 Duloxetine withdrawn from 90mg to 1-week on 60mg, then stopped (Aripiprazole 5mg continued)
  • November 2021 Agomelatine 25mg started + Aripiprazole 5mg
  • December 2021 Agomelatine 50mg + Aripiprazole 5mg (increasing fatigue, anxiety, depression and suicidality)
  • January 2022 Agomelatine stopped (no tapering for - clinician decision), Aripiprazole 5mg stopped (no tapering - decision made by my son)
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On 7/14/2022 at 7:03 AM, Sofa said:

Is it normal to have Windows and waves with anhedonia and emotional numbness?

 

I was feeling a little better, and could to a small extent Feel a little excited and content. 
 

Not on any way like before, but it was something. 
 

Then i suddenly got really bad again. My brain feels like it is fried and not functioning at all. 
 

My anhedonia and numbness is worse that ever. 
 

Is it a wave or Did i eat or do something to make it worse? 

Hi @Sofa yes in my experience this is all part of WD. This happens to me all the time - sometimes a few times up and down even within one day. I also know what you mean about your brain feeling fried and not functioning at all. To be honest I've given up trying to figure out what sets it off or not. I just try to accept this is all part of WD and will get better in time.

Hang in there xx

History of depression and anxiety. Symptoms of PTSD.

1998-1999 Venlafaxine 2006-2007 Prozac. 2013-15 Sertraline 50mg. 2015 cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg. 2015-2021 Citalopram 20mg (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019.

01/2021 Dropped from 20mg to 10mg, back up to 20mg til June.

25/6/21 stopped CT. Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my serotonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp.
11/7/21 Stopped 5htp with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg.  

16/7/21 Reinstated cit at 1mg.

2/8/21 Increased dose to 2mg. 
28/11/21 10% reduction to 1.8mg.

8/12/21 2mg 6/1/22 1.8mg 10/2/22 1.6mg 13/5/22 1.5mg 4/6/22 1.55mg 4/7/22 1.4mg 4/8/22 1.25mg

Multiple unsuccessful previous attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle. Other medications; kliovance (HRT) Other supplements; magnesium glycinate, calcium, B12, vitD and vegan omega3. I use valerian and lemon balm tea for anxiety relief

Completely OFF booze (since 6/11/21) and caffeine (since July 21) now. Main symptoms; crushing depression, anhedonia/emotional anesthesia, irritability, rage, anxiety/fear, cognitive fog, inability to focus, restlessness and some insomnia

 

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At the beginning, I felt like my hands weren't attached to my wrists

My head felt like a piece of my brain was missing

  That is also gone.  I feel a slow feeling in.  Things are happening but not not proper emotion

 At least I can cry now.

On 7/16/2022 at 3:23 AM, Sofa said:

Does Anyone else also else also experience this strange thing?

 

I Feel like there is no connection between my head and my body. 

I generelt am really emotionally flat, but Sometimes i can Feel hint of an emotion, but only in my body. 

 

I cant feel the same emotion in my head. My head still feels empty and dense/dark. 

 

My body shows signs of anger or annoyance f.ex., but my head is still in empty/neutral mode with no feelings/sensations. 

 

Sometimes this means i struggle to understand what the emotions in my body are. I also struggle with other sensations like hunger. 

 

There is just no connection. 

 

Has Anyone else experienced something similar? Does it get better?

Zoloft on an off since 30s with no issues. On and off for years  long periods 25 to 150 mg.  75 average dose.  (Current age 50).

Risperdal 1 month. 2018.  Various trials of other drugs but Never for more than couple of weeks due to poor tolerance and all over 12 years ago.  Script for seldom used klonopin.  Would take 1 month at most.  Off for years

January 2021 went off Zoloft 25 mg and supplemented with Fish Oil/L Theanine/L Tryptophan to keep up Serotonin level

zoloft taper 100 t0 25mg over one year. concerns of vision heart side effects jumped at 25

went off in january 

Off for three weeks, went back on at 25 mg after depression symptoms came back

February 12 2022- either med reaction/serotonin toxicity with Zoloft mix other serotonin natural supplements

February 16 - 21 2022 (two doses of Zoloft on advice to restart, one 25mg, one 12.5mg - nausea

Supplements. Fish oil magnesium mct oil cytokine suppress multi vitamin nac modified keto and daily walks

Over next 2 months re instated  Zoloft to 65mg with significant partial improvements steady sleep. 

June 7 Resume taper 62.5 on  6/21 60mg 7/9 57.5mg 7/24 54 mg

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On 7/16/2022 at 6:27 PM, Kat66 said:

Hi @Sofa yes in my experience this is all part of WD. This happens to me all the time - sometimes a few times up and down even within one day. I also know what you mean about your brain feeling fried and not functioning at all. To be honest I've given up trying to figure out what sets it off or not. I just try to accept this is all part of WD and will get better in time.

Hang in there xx


My anhedonia was not really that bad before, i was just more numb, but now it is really bad.

 

I have no pleasurable feeling ever. 
 

Before food and drink, and watching familiar shows on tv could give me some comfort and pleasure, even though i Did not Feel interest or excitement.

 

Now i struggle to eat and drink because food makes me Feel nothing. I just Feel empty, like i Did not eat at all. I cannot enjoy food or drink, and i cannot Feel comfort from it.

 

I cant Feel music or touch at all. 

 

Absoluted nothing makes me Feel good and i dont enjoy anything. 
 

Before my anhedonia was not that bad. 
 

Anhedonia had gitter progressivly worse, and that makes me scared. 
 

It is six months since my bad reaction.

June-July -21 Zyprexa 2.5-7.5 mg 

July -21 Mianserin 20 mg four days

July-Aug -21 Valium 30 mg a day, tapred, return of symptoms 

Aug-Oct -21 Oxazepam Tapred from 10 mg x 3 to zero

Dec-Jan -21/22 On and off mirtazapine 15 mg. Kindling reaction?

March 8.-19. - Zopiclone 7.5 mg to combat insomnia 

March 20 - 5 mg valium because of akathisia and panic 

April 3. - 5 mg x 2

 

 
 

 

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I have only gotten worse the past six months sadly. 
 

I have zero emotional response to the world now. I Feel nothing when listening to music, i Feel nothing when i talk to my loved ones, i Feel nothing watching my favourite show.

 

It is not just that it is less interesting and gives me less than before, it is actually no response, just dead on the inside. I keep looking for a response that is not there. My body feels lifeless like a corpse.

 

Can emotions come back and anhedonia lift? 

 

I dont just Feel no pleasure, i Feel nothing at all. It is not just numbness anymore, but full blown anesthesia. 

June-July -21 Zyprexa 2.5-7.5 mg 

July -21 Mianserin 20 mg four days

July-Aug -21 Valium 30 mg a day, tapred, return of symptoms 

Aug-Oct -21 Oxazepam Tapred from 10 mg x 3 to zero

Dec-Jan -21/22 On and off mirtazapine 15 mg. Kindling reaction?

March 8.-19. - Zopiclone 7.5 mg to combat insomnia 

March 20 - 5 mg valium because of akathisia and panic 

April 3. - 5 mg x 2

 

 
 

 

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Hi @Sofa

I'm sorry you're struggling. 

 

Have you seen @Kat66's comment above? July 10th in this thread. 

 

You might find it helpful to watch the two videos Kat has shared. 

They offer practical strategies for how to approach healing anhedonia. 

Acceptance and patience are key -- sound familiar? ;-)

 

Linking to Kat's post here:

 

If you read the success stories in the Recovery Forum, many, many people have suffered from anhedonia and emotional anesthesia and healed. 

Hang in there, Sofa. It gets better <3

Healing is happening all the time, even when we don't consciously feel (!) it <3

 

1996-2018 - misc. polypharmacy, incl. SSRIs, SNRIs, neuroleptics, lithium, benzos, stimulants, antihistamines, etc. (approx. 30+ drugs)

2012-2018 - 10mg lexapro/escitalopram (20mg?)    Jan. 2018 - 10mg -> 5mg, then from 5mg -> 2.5mg, then 0mg  -->  July 2018 - 0mg

2017(?)-2020 - vyvanse/lisdexamfetamine 60-70mg    2020-2021 - 70mg down to 0mg  -->  July 2021 - 0mg

March-April 2021 - vortioxetine 5-10mg (approx. 7 weeks total; CT)  -->  April 28th, 2021 - 0mg

supplements: magnesium powder (dissolved in water) as needed throughout the day; 1 tsp fish oil w/ morning meal; 2mg melatonin 

August 1, 2022 - 1 mg melatonin

 

Courage is fear that has said its prayers.  - Karle Wilson Baker

love and justice are not two. without inner change, there can be no outer change; without collective change, no change matters.  - Rev. angel Kyodo williams

Holding multiple truths. Knowing that everyone has their own accurate view of the way things are.  - text on homemade banner at Afiya house

 

I am not a medical professional; this is not medical advice. 

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@Sofa I'm so sorry to hear that your anaethesia is so bad. As @Ariel has mentioned, those videos are worth a watch. I honestly didn't think there was any way to deal with anhedonia, but it seems there is!

Hang in there xx

History of depression and anxiety. Symptoms of PTSD.

1998-1999 Venlafaxine 2006-2007 Prozac. 2013-15 Sertraline 50mg. 2015 cross-tapered to citalopram 20mg. 2015-2021 Citalopram 20mg (brief increase to 30mg for 2/3 months in 2019.

01/2021 Dropped from 20mg to 10mg, back up to 20mg til June.

25/6/21 stopped CT. Started 50mg 5htp after a week without citalopram in the hope this would balance out my serotonin levels. After 3 days increased to 100mg 5htp.
11/7/21 Stopped 5htp with the intention of reinstating citalopram at 1mg.  

16/7/21 Reinstated cit at 1mg.

2/8/21 Increased dose to 2mg. 
28/11/21 10% reduction to 1.8mg.

8/12/21 2mg 6/1/22 1.8mg 10/2/22 1.6mg 13/5/22 1.5mg 4/6/22 1.55mg 4/7/22 1.4mg 4/8/22 1.25mg

Multiple unsuccessful previous attempts to taper off citalopram. Vegan, otherwise healthy lifestyle. Other medications; kliovance (HRT) Other supplements; magnesium glycinate, calcium, B12, vitD and vegan omega3. I use valerian and lemon balm tea for anxiety relief

Completely OFF booze (since 6/11/21) and caffeine (since July 21) now. Main symptoms; crushing depression, anhedonia/emotional anesthesia, irritability, rage, anxiety/fear, cognitive fog, inability to focus, restlessness and some insomnia

 

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@Sofa, I believe we explained to you before that emotional anesthesia was a common post-discontinuation symptom after people have been on psychiatric drugs. We see it very, very gradually go away. If you are still taking a benzodiazepine, this can be contributing to it.

 

For further discussion about your particular situation, please post in your Introductions topic.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

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On 7/14/2022 at 8:03 AM, Sofa said:

Is it normal to have Windows and waves with anhedonia and emotional numbness?

 

I was feeling a little better, and could to a small extent Feel a little excited and content. 
 

Not on any way like before, but it was something. 
 

Then i suddenly got really bad again. My brain feels like it is fried and not functioning at all. 
 

My anhedonia and numbness is worse that ever. 
 

Is it a wave or Did i eat or do something to make it worse? 

Hi Sofa, I experience the same. I couldn’t name it till I found this. How are you feeling now? If I like u can send me a massage 

I don’t remember everything but I tray

2019 3-4 months citalopram (tiered from medication 

2019 3-4 month Escitalopram (same as citalopram)

2019-03/2020 Effexor ( CT because I was psychotic on this medication )

08/2020 Risperdal 4mg 1 week than taper to 2Mg 09/2020 1mg Risperdal + Effexor 37,5 till April CT in Psyward by the doctors

April 2021 relapse and get 20 mg Abilify ( i think it was WD not relapse) 

May 2021 CT Abilify 

Hospital : try a lot of Medication Medication Sep2021: 150 mg sertralin and 50mg Quentiapin 

tapered in hospital 3 month 0 mg sertralin and 50 mg quentiapin 

March 2022 CT Quentiapin 

Current medication 0

 

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Any recovery stories of shrinking genital, body numbness, severe emotional blunting and total blank mind? My brain feels changed!

June-July -21 Zyprexa 2.5-7.5 mg 

July -21 Mianserin 20 mg four days

July-Aug -21 Valium 30 mg a day, tapred, return of symptoms 

Aug-Oct -21 Oxazepam Tapred from 10 mg x 3 to zero

Dec-Jan -21/22 On and off mirtazapine 15 mg. Kindling reaction?

March 8.-19. - Zopiclone 7.5 mg to combat insomnia 

March 20 - 5 mg valium because of akathisia and panic 

April 3. - 5 mg x 2

 

 
 

 

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1 hour ago, Sofa said:

Any recovery stories of shrinking genital, body numbness, severe emotional blunting and total blank mind? My brain feels changed!

 

Venlafaxine 75mg, 150mg, 225mg December 2020 - March 2021

Zoloft 50mg, 100mg March 2021 - April 2021

Cipralex 10mg, 20 mg April 2021 - May 2021

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3 hours ago, Fairsome said:

 


I am not connected to my body, and my mind feels to blank. Like i get not thougts or associations at all. I have no emotions at all 

 

my body does not react to stimulus and i cant Feel emotions in my body

June-July -21 Zyprexa 2.5-7.5 mg 

July -21 Mianserin 20 mg four days

July-Aug -21 Valium 30 mg a day, tapred, return of symptoms 

Aug-Oct -21 Oxazepam Tapred from 10 mg x 3 to zero

Dec-Jan -21/22 On and off mirtazapine 15 mg. Kindling reaction?

March 8.-19. - Zopiclone 7.5 mg to combat insomnia 

March 20 - 5 mg valium because of akathisia and panic 

April 3. - 5 mg x 2

 

 
 

 

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4 hours ago, Sofa said:


I am not connected to my body, and my mind feels to blank. Like i get not thougts or associations at all. I have no emotions at all 

 

my body does not react to stimulus and i cant Feel emotions in my body

I really think that you are overthinking too much... My advice is to take some time off from the forums, don't experiment with random supplements and just relax. It is very likely that things will get better given some time.

Venlafaxine 75mg, 150mg, 225mg December 2020 - March 2021

Zoloft 50mg, 100mg March 2021 - April 2021

Cipralex 10mg, 20 mg April 2021 - May 2021

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Anyone else who has completely lost anxiety? I cant Feel anxiety at all? 
 

Are there recovery stories of people who also lost anxiety? 

June-July -21 Zyprexa 2.5-7.5 mg 

July -21 Mianserin 20 mg four days

July-Aug -21 Valium 30 mg a day, tapred, return of symptoms 

Aug-Oct -21 Oxazepam Tapred from 10 mg x 3 to zero

Dec-Jan -21/22 On and off mirtazapine 15 mg. Kindling reaction?

March 8.-19. - Zopiclone 7.5 mg to combat insomnia 

March 20 - 5 mg valium because of akathisia and panic 

April 3. - 5 mg x 2

 

 
 

 

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1 hour ago, Sofa said:

Anyone else who has completely lost anxiety? I cant Feel anxiety at all? 
 

Are there recovery stories of people who also lost anxiety? 

How did you mean that lost? Lost of fear? Yes I experience this! And loss of personality 

I don’t remember everything but I tray

2019 3-4 months citalopram (tiered from medication 

2019 3-4 month Escitalopram (same as citalopram)

2019-03/2020 Effexor ( CT because I was psychotic on this medication )

08/2020 Risperdal 4mg 1 week than taper to 2Mg 09/2020 1mg Risperdal + Effexor 37,5 till April CT in Psyward by the doctors

April 2021 relapse and get 20 mg Abilify ( i think it was WD not relapse) 

May 2021 CT Abilify 

Hospital : try a lot of Medication Medication Sep2021: 150 mg sertralin and 50mg Quentiapin 

tapered in hospital 3 month 0 mg sertralin and 50 mg quentiapin 

March 2022 CT Quentiapin 

Current medication 0

 

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26 minutes ago, Quittingquentiapin said:

How did you mean that lost? Lost of fear? Yes I experience this! And loss of personality 

I cant feel fear either. But i also dont feel stresse or anxious at all. 
 

Like i am completely blank with no emotiosn what so ever. 

June-July -21 Zyprexa 2.5-7.5 mg 

July -21 Mianserin 20 mg four days

July-Aug -21 Valium 30 mg a day, tapred, return of symptoms 

Aug-Oct -21 Oxazepam Tapred from 10 mg x 3 to zero

Dec-Jan -21/22 On and off mirtazapine 15 mg. Kindling reaction?

March 8.-19. - Zopiclone 7.5 mg to combat insomnia 

March 20 - 5 mg valium because of akathisia and panic 

April 3. - 5 mg x 2

 

 
 

 

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2 hours ago, Sofa said:

I cant feel fear either. But i also dont feel stresse or anxious at all. 
 

Like i am completely blank with no emotiosn what so ever. 

Me too. But I think a lot. Iam the hole time in my head thinking. But yes no emotions no fear etc.

I don’t remember everything but I tray

2019 3-4 months citalopram (tiered from medication 

2019 3-4 month Escitalopram (same as citalopram)

2019-03/2020 Effexor ( CT because I was psychotic on this medication )

08/2020 Risperdal 4mg 1 week than taper to 2Mg 09/2020 1mg Risperdal + Effexor 37,5 till April CT in Psyward by the doctors

April 2021 relapse and get 20 mg Abilify ( i think it was WD not relapse) 

May 2021 CT Abilify 

Hospital : try a lot of Medication Medication Sep2021: 150 mg sertralin and 50mg Quentiapin 

tapered in hospital 3 month 0 mg sertralin and 50 mg quentiapin 

March 2022 CT Quentiapin 

Current medication 0

 

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