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alexjuice

Feelings Towards My Doctor

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alexjuice

Curiously, I don't read too many entries expressing anger at our previous doctors. I guess, relative to the nature of the sight, I can't think of too many posters who have shared many specifics of their doctor who first prescribed for them.

 

Of course, nearly all of us have shared our experiences with doctors at large.

 

I think back to the beginning for me, as a teen, and I gave one individual too much power because I thought he could help me. Over the years, as my condition fluctuated I wasn't entirely able to understand what was happening beyond suspicions that things weren't "right". I often felt that I was being guessed at, that my doctor didn't really know what he was doing.

 

One time, almost a decade ago, I decided that my doctor had misjudged me and manuaevered to unpatient myself. Following doctors orders I stopped cold two medications and dramatically, hurriedly decreased another. I got much worse and at this time I had no counterintel to my doctor's interpretation that my terrifying symptoms only proved why I needed the meds. It's that familiar story.

 

When I think of this man, the doctor, I am sometimes very angry at him. Sometimes afraid of him. Sometimes discouraged that I can never get justice. Sometimes I have day dreams of righting this wrong.

 

I do not know what to do with the feelings I have. I brought them up with my therapist, but she is psychiatrist who mainly does psychotherapy, but still is a psychiatrist. I don't think she makes the ideal individual to process my feelings with, and I sometimes wonder if in the past she has well-meaningly poisoned an individual with pharmaceuticals. Stinks I go to a shrink to air issues with shrinks.

 

I will never be what I would have been if I hadn't gone to the psychiatrist's office as a teen in 1997. I've done a lot of things in life that others would regret, and i regret them too, but all the impulsive and self destructive stuff doesn't weigh on me so much. I was under the influence of many Drugs and hadn't shown tendency towards those behaviors before or after Drugs.

 

I choose to start on meds, I got worse and this guy got money and off scot free. More than anything in life, I regret ever meeting him. And if I told that too his face, I don't think he would care too much. I wish I could sue.

 

I wonder, to others, when you think of your doctor do you have feelings of anger or betrayal or sadness?

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compsports

Great topic Alex.

 

I think I am afraid to let myself get angry at my former psychiatrists and all the other psychiatrists I have dealt with out of fear that I will get a paralyzing depression because I feel so many productive years of my life were wasted. So I don't let myself go there.

 

Occasionally, on this board, there will be posts that remind of me of particular situations that angered me and that is ok because I think that is good for me. But on my own, I just don't think of the anger.

 

Interestingly, I am more angry at the former sleep specialist who essentially didn't want to treat my apnea and wanted to pawn me off on psychiatry. It was a horrible experience.

 

By the way, I was struck by this statement - "Over the years, as my condition fluctuated I wasn't entirely able to understand what was happening beyond suspicions that things weren't "right". "

 

Right before I started tapering off my meds, I had similar feelings. Is that due to us breaking through the spellbinding effects of the drugs to intuitively know that something isn't right but be unable to express it due to the cognitive damage the meds are causing?

 

Anyway, because I couldn't express myself very well, my concerns got blown off and the doctor deemed the meds working just fine as my functioning continued to decrease.

 

By the way, right before I quit seeing my psychiatrist, I told him that I wished I had never set forth in the area of psychiatry. Even though I chose my words very carefully, his next question was to ask how my mood was. I quickly shut up and switched the conversation.

 

So you are right, I don't think your doctor would have cared if you had said something. It probably would have proved to him that you were mentally ill.

 

CS

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Shanti

This is a good topic. It's good to express our anger. As far as the doctors that put me on these horrid meds, I've forgiven them. I can see now that they themselves were victims of corrupt Big Pharma. The doctors at the emergency room that labeled me based on my Xanax prescription and put my life in danger for it, I'm more angry at them. They caused me and my family a lot of stress and unnecessary suffering from the delay it caused. I feel like they should've known better, whereas my regular doctor was simply ignorant to the effects of the drugs and was sincerely trying to help me. I do have a personal philosophy of perpetual forgiveness. Not to condone there actions but to cut me free from the anger.

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starlitegirlx

Basically, I've dealt with one psychiatrist for the past 20 years. I liked him most of the time though I never cared for how I would tell him I didn't care if I died and he shrugged it off as if it's par for the course. Granted, I'm grateful he didn't start playing with my meds but he knew I wouldn't have any of that.

 

When the withdrawal got bad around 10mg he couldn't seem to get it through his thick noggin that this can happen. Then again, he only had 1 other patient who was on imipramine for 10 yrs come off with no issues. Don't know what his dose was but that's also 6 years less than me and everyone is different. So yes, I'm enraged at him, but mostly due to a phone call I had with him (and I'm not a person who ever calls him except once for sick leave and once for a med issue) and he was rather abrupt with me and more interested in getting me into his office so he could tell me he didn't know or understand what was happening but did think it was withdrawal. Basically, he couldn't be bothered. And this was around 2 months after I stopped the meds so I was well within my right to call and be scared, concerned, etc. But he treated me pretty coldly.

 

Once thing I take away from this is that as much as for many years I hated scientologists for attacking psychiatry because I believed I was one who needed meds and believed I was benefiting from them and that it's not quack science, turns out they're dead on. Most cases docs have zero idea what the actual cause is. Few probe to see if it's situational or stress related and even fewer bother to work on helping you cope before delving out the meds. That's not medicine. They don't even know what the cause of the depression is. They don't know if the med will work. They play russian roulette trying to find one to help. Where is the science in any of that? It's dark ages BS. Labotomies without the ice pick or whatever they used. Just sort of that level of medicine.

 

Now I hate my doc and will be brief and curt like he was to me and even point out to him that his lack of knowledge on the topic has made me a borderline scientologist (which he will hate) and that I think most of it is quackery regarding medicating patients. He's a pill pusher who'd do much better for his patients if he worked on coping strategies and helping people become aware of stressors and avoid the ones they can avoid. Oh yes, that session will be fun. Who knows if I'll even make it since it's in a few months and I'm not sure where I'll be functioning wise at that point. Might have to get a ride. Might need help walking. Might have to be adamant that he take me next given the circumstances. And will refuse anything he offers as a suggestion due to the fact that he is utterly clueless about all of what I'm going through.

 

I think we're best off following our instincts and intuitions. Not logic but that sense that tells us about things because for a decade, I would have this yick feeling about taking my meds, like something in me knew not to take them so they would sit beside me until I finally forced myself to take them. Looking back, I believe I knew intuitively or on some deeper level physiologically that the pills were bad news. But I was told repeatedly I had to take them every day or it would be very, very bad. Very very bad compared to what? The crap I'm dealing with now?

 

How's that for angry? Enraged enough? Sound like I want to throttle my doc or shove him out a window or wish withdrawal on him? And I'm a very passive person. I walk away and let it go before wasting energy on someone or something like anger. But every so often there comes a person or a situation that really needs some hell to rain down on them as a teacher, you know?

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Altostrata

LOL! I also find it very uncomfortable to be in bed with Scientology (thank the deity it's a big bed), but it's true, in their wrongheaded way, they're right about psychiatry.

 

I have nothing but contempt for the various clueless psychiatrists and doctors who did not get it that I had withdrawal syndrome. Being hoodwinked by pharma is no excuse -- they go to school all those years so they can know better! And they're so pretentious about their superior knowledge -- not knowing they're ignorant fools.

 

For years, I used to fantasize about confronting each of them and telling them how wrong they were, but my condition wouldn't let me take on the stress. Now I feel I have better things to do, like exposing the fraud of psychiatric treatment.

 

Doctors have sold their birthright -- their patients' trust -- for a mess of garbage (and sometimes money) from pharma. I'm not sorry for them.

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ceej

I definitely understand the anger. I think what pisses me off the most is the poor structure of the mental health program at my ***. Being able to see a psychiatrist for a few minutes at a time and very rarely at that is no way to help people. I recently found out my psychiatrist moved to another nearby facility within my *** but they want me to get a new one at my current facility. Two things about this stinks. One, they didn't bother to tell me until I called to make an appointment. And two, consistency in care should be a higher priority.

 

This isn't the first time this program has angered me. I'm just so grateful about mental health parity laws, because through my employer I have access to other insurance with which to visit a therapist. I don't have to justify it with the insurance on an ongoing basis and it's relatively inexpensive. I would not be in the good place I am now without having had this therapy for the last 4 years.

 

After having read so much about big pharma and its partnership with psychiatry as a whole, and in some respects the media too which helps propagate the false idea of SSRI efficacy and the chemical imbalance myth, I feel mostly very betrayed.

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Altostrata

(ceej, what does *** mean?)

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starlitegirlx

LOL! I also find it very uncomfortable to be in bed with Scientology (thank the deity it's a big bed), but it's true, in their wrongheaded way, they're right about psychiatry.

 

I have nothing but contempt for the various clueless psychiatrists and doctors who did not get it that I had withdrawal syndrome. Being hoodwinked by pharma is no excuse -- they go to school all those years so they can know better! And they're so pretentious about their superior knowledge -- not knowing they're ignorant fools.

 

For years, I used to fantasize about confronting each of them and telling them how wrong they were, but my condition wouldn't let me take on the stress. Now I feel I have better things to do, like exposing the fraud of psychiatric treatment.

 

Doctors have sold their birthright -- their patients' trust -- for a mess of garbage (and sometimes money) from pharma. I'm not sorry for them.

 

This site you've made here and I think the blog you made that led me here (was that you?) is a great way to get your power back and make up for not telling them off. It's actually helping people. You provide some general knowledge and a lot of support as well as a forum full of people who can find and give support. My prediction is that this site will grow. I wish more people knew about it. I'm not even sure it was up when I started my decreases. But this here, what you have done here, this matters.

 

Doctors have become about the money. Greedy pigs. Few genuinely care. I hate them all except three that I had great experiences with when I was in crisis. That's how you can tell the good ones. How they treat you when you are really in a bad spot. Do they blow you off and dismiss you are seem to genuinely care and want to help. In my life, I've seen probably 20 doctors total. 3 of them are good in my book. One is retired... he was the best family doc ever. He knew stuff way beyond what my current family doc does. I think part of it is that teaching has gone to hell as well.

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starlitegirlx

After having read so much about big pharma and its partnership with psychiatry as a whole, and in some respects the media too which helps propagate the false idea of SSRI efficacy and the chemical imbalance myth, I feel mostly very betrayed.

 

I love the 'chemical imbalance myth'. I think that was somebody's guess that they turned to science and fact because how on earth do you test such a thing. Back decades ago, I never pondered that which is rather relevant to the assumption. What if it's just as simple as people are different, unique and some lean toward depression more. And perhaps those people tend to be more sensitive to things like stress. Doesn't mean that there's anything 'wrong' with them. It's just how they are and they tend to need a bit more help from society due to this (as in financial and medical resources). But then groups call us lazy and blah, blah... sorry I'm not in a wheelchair so you can see an overtly obvious handicap I live with but that's your ignorance, not mine. LOL.

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meistersinger

 

After having read so much about big pharma and its partnership with psychiatry as a whole, and in some respects the media too which helps propagate the false idea of SSRI efficacy and the chemical imbalance myth, I feel mostly very betrayed.

 

I love the 'chemical imbalance myth'. I think that was somebody's guess that they turned to science and fact because how on earth do you test such a thing. Back decades ago, I never pondered that which is rather relevant to the assumption. What if it's just as simple as people are different, unique and some lean toward depression more. And perhaps those people tend to be more sensitive to things like stress. Doesn't mean that there's anything 'wrong' with them. It's just how they are and they tend to need a bit more help from society due to this (as in financial and medical resources). But then groups call us lazy and blah, blah... sorry I'm not in a wheelchair so you can see an overtly obvious handicap I live with but that's your ignorance, not mine. LOL.

 

I'm glad you made the lazy comment in regards to a mental handicap. I've always been anxious, let alone be a perfectionist. It is what got me tossed out of what used to be my mother's house, which my brother now owns. He's ex-Army Reserve, and does not believe in mental handicaps like depression, anxiety, etc., although he is even more bipolar and anxious than I am. In his world, might (which he considers to be confidence) makes right, everything else be damned. It is why I'm posting from behind a triple locked door at a small mom and pop motel.

 

I did speak to the secretary of the Lower Susquehanna Synod of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America this morning before church. He, his wife, and father-in-law, are pastors, and we're supply pastors when the congregation was still located downtown. I was also serving as acolyte , as well as tenor soloist at the time. I'm surprised he still remembered me. He was just as surprised when he heard of my plight. Since he is connected to the Synod office, he might be able to assist in my plight, as well as the assistant pastor's husband, who is now in the Synod office.

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starlitegirlx

 

 

After having read so much about big pharma and its partnership with psychiatry as a whole, and in some respects the media too which helps propagate the false idea of SSRI efficacy and the chemical imbalance myth, I feel mostly very betrayed.

 

I love the 'chemical imbalance myth'. I think that was somebody's guess that they turned to science and fact because how on earth do you test such a thing. Back decades ago, I never pondered that which is rather relevant to the assumption. What if it's just as simple as people are different, unique and some lean toward depression more. And perhaps those people tend to be more sensitive to things like stress. Doesn't mean that there's anything 'wrong' with them. It's just how they are and they tend to need a bit more help from society due to this (as in financial and medical resources). But then groups call us lazy and blah, blah... sorry I'm not in a wheelchair so you can see an overtly obvious handicap I live with but that's your ignorance, not mine. LOL.

 

I'm glad you made the lazy comment in regards to a mental handicap. I've always been anxious, let alone be a perfectionist. It is what got me tossed out of what used to be my mother's house, which my brother now owns. He's ex-Army Reserve, and does not believe in mental handicaps like depression, anxiety, etc., although he is even more bipolar and anxious than I am. In his world, might (which he considers to be confidence) makes right, everything else be damned. It is why I'm posting from behind a triple locked door at a small mom and pop motel.

 

 

Ignorance is a wicked thing. Does so much damage and what is most shocking about it is how the majority of ignorance is choice. People choose to remain ignorant or choose to deny things because it does not fit with their beliefs about reality or something specific. Those people are the ones that need a reality adjustment in the form of having to live with what they choose to be ignorant about, like a problem or issue or in a situation, for several years. I say this as my uncle who was very ignorant about my depression and insulting at times or just plain insensitive implying I was a lazy failure on the rare times we visited (live 500 miles away - YAY!) was forced to endure serious depression after a car accident. It lasted many months perhaps a year. It was oh so hard for him. People fussed and I laughed. Sorry but karma in his case was the sword of justice. I never bothered to ask about why he was depressed - perhaps an injury or something. I really didn't care. Now maybe he'll reconsider his take on things though it's more likely he'd say he had a reason due to the accident where I never had one. Since I'll never see him again, I don't care, but if I did I would reply 'your reason was short term. My existence is life long. You buckled under short term. I survived longer than half your life what incapacitated you for a year. Your reason is weak.'

 

Now there are days I do truly believe in karma.

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Barbarannamated

I have so much to contribute here, but not emotionally strong enough at the moment to dig it up.

 

I was going to put this in "#$@% my doctor said", but saw the mention of the CI theory and thouggt I'd toss in a fun tidbit.

 

For those not familiar, my husband is an MD who is also very overmedicated (quick taper off Effexor in the spring, still on stims and benzos). It's been difficult for me to see through the fraud while he's still spellbound and continue to hear of him approving scripts for SS/NRIs. He works at home doing utilization review for Work Comp insurance. Most pain patients are put on SNRIs.

 

For a year, Ive been trying to talk to him about "the evidence", the tainted clinical trials, the Chemical Imbalance Myth.. I finally had to stop banging my head against the wall because every discussion ended badly. I went to the ISEPP Conference last October and talked to Bob Whitaker and several others briefly. Husband has read some of Anatomy of an Epidemic. We also watched Irving Kirsch on 60 Minutes several months ago. I wasnt aware of what's been registering.

 

Last week, husband told me of an interaction with a woman who had been taking an SSRi. My mind usually checks out early on in these misadventures, but I heard him awkwardly say "I told her there is no such thing as a chemical imbalance... there never was!"

 

It was the first hint that he's heard and believed what I've been trying to tell him for the last year. It was obviously difficult and awkward for him to utter those words for the first time. He sounded like a proud little kid.

 

Oh, for that webcam I've wished for...!

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Altostrata

See, Barb, he is listening, a little bit. It sounds like he's reaching out to you in his own incompetent way.

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dalsaan

what I find particularly insidious about the chemical imbalance myth is that it takes advantage of the stigmatization of mental health issues and

the shame that goes along with that. I bought the chemical imbalance myth. I willfully accepted it as gospel. I wanted it to be true because it

was easy to accept and made it a more 'physical' illness. My doctor wanted me to accept it because he could explain it and solve it in the 5 minute

time slot he gave me for my $63.00

 

I am angry at him because I needed him to think well about what was going on, particularly because I was in no state to do that for myself. I am also angry

with myself for giving him the benefit of any doubt.

 

Alex, perhaps you could express your feelings in a letter to your doctor. He might not listen but you may feel better just having put it to him?

 

Dalsaan

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Aria

This is something I have thought of many many times. I was scared for years he'd have me locked up because he had admitted to my face he had been completely misdiagnosed and prescribed to me. At night I would lay in bed swearing up a storm at him and his dumb ass office associates. I was consumed with hate towards him. I got furious at myself because I fell for psychiatry's BS and the rouse I was permanently damaged.

 

Now?? I still feel like there is a hole in me that time may never fill again. There are so few who can understand what I went through. The psychiatrist took years from me. How could I had gone to his office for constant Med Checks and he never just never realized the drugs were killing my soul?

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areyouthere

Doctors have sold their birthright -- their patients' trust -- for a mess of garbage (and sometimes money) from pharma. I'm not sorry for them.

 

Touche!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Good thread Alex..... it's got my heart rate up...but there is a part of me that says , wait a minute... "Don't kill the messenger"? Is there anyone who sees this ? Are some of these Docs a victim themselves by the very fact that they are trained and indoctrinated ( that word has doctor in it.... interesting) in "Western" medical facilities ?

 

From just my very little research it does seem as if the UK, Norway and even Japan are way ahead of the US in embracing the fallacy of chemical imbalance etc etc.

 

This follows a pattern of the US being behind as a result of arrogance.... for example using antiseptics and general sanitary practices during surgical procedures had long been practiced in Europe before the US took it up. The US medical community were well aware of the practice and the positve results/outcome but put their nose up at it..... for whatever reason.

 

Obviously we haven't learned from our mistakes.

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compsports

LOL! I also find it very uncomfortable to be in bed with Scientology (thank the deity it's a big bed), but it's true, in their wrongheaded way, they're right about psychiatry.

 

I have nothing but contempt for the various clueless psychiatrists and doctors who did not get it that I had withdrawal syndrome. Being hoodwinked by pharma is no excuse -- they go to school all those years so they can know better! And they're so pretentious about their superior knowledge -- not knowing they're ignorant fools.

 

For years, I used to fantasize about confronting each of them and telling them how wrong they were, but my condition wouldn't let me take on the stress. Now I feel I have better things to do, like exposing the fraud of psychiatric treatment.

 

Doctors have sold their birthright -- their patients' trust -- for a mess of garbage (and sometimes money) from pharma. I'm not sorry for them.

 

Alto,

 

Totally agree with you about not feeling sorry for doctors and them selling their birthright.

 

Besides psychiatry (Dr P excepted), I have contempt for the PCP I considered seeing in 2007 who when I told him I was tapering off of psych meds, said that in his experience, most people needed to be on ADs for life. Needless to say, I didn't chose him as my doctor.

 

I also have contempt for all the regular doctors who chose psych meds as the treatment of choice instead of trying to figure out what really is going on.

 

I also have contempt for all the doctors who ask about psych med history on their patient information forms not understanding that that is essentially stigmatizing patients if they honest about their history and forcing people to lie.

 

I have contempt for all the doctors who require that prospective patients fill out a mental health screening form which is another way for someone to become stigmatized and forced into the psych med h-ll.

 

I am contempt for all the doctors who are so clueless and arrogant and have sold their soul to big pharma, patient be dammed.

 

CS

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Altostrata

Good points, cs.

 

Let us not forget that, although the vast majority of psychiatrists are jerks, there is a minority that gets the problems and a few that are actively working on our side to change things.

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starlitegirlx

Good points, cs.

 

Let us not forget that, although the vast majority of psychiatrists are jerks, there is a minority that gets the problems and a few that are actively working on our side to change things.

 

Too few as far as I'm concerned and they'll be treated, for the most part, like outsiders within their own profession as is always the case when someone dares to shine light into the darkness. Psychiatry should be stripped of it's label and no longer be considered part of the medical community minus the docs that fit Altostrata's quote above.

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Altostrata

Absolutely agree, starlite!

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Barbarannamated

 

Good thread Alex..... it's got my heart rate up...but there is a part of me that says , wait a minute... "Don't kill the messenger"? Is there anyone who sees this ? Are some of these Docs a victim themselves by the very fact that they are trained and indoctrinated ( that word has doctor in it.... interesting) in "Western" medical facilities ?

 

From just my very little research it does seem as if the UK, Norway and even Japan are way ahead of the US in embracing the fallacy of chemical imbalance etc etc.

 

Yes, this is absolutely the case from all MDs that I know - most have taken the drugs themselves or recommended to family and friends. I know this is true of my psychiatrist and his family, my family, and other doctors I know.

 

This is extremely important to keep in mind because it is likely the very element that is keeping them from acknowledging our situation and the reality of the fraudulent data.

 

I think we've all come up against family and friends who doubt us because they still trust the medical system. Imagine doctors whose entire livelihood and identity are wrapped up in this, trying to wrap their heads around this paradigm shattering AND feeling (on some subconscious level) a responsibility to clean up the mess they created but have no idea how.

 

Compare this to the announcement of the Women's Health Initiative trials with hormone replacement and announcement on every news outlet that millions of women should be taken off hormones. It was medical pandemonium. I think that most women CTd or tapered rapidly (and many were put on Zoloft, but that's an entirely different discussion). Now, substitute SS/NRIs and announcement that the CI theory is bogus and there are dangers to SS/NRIs. Many people would CT without doctor involvement. I dont think it's being dramatic to say there would be mass chaos given the numbers of people taking these drugs.and the various reactions people have to withdrawal - mania, mood fluctuations, severe depression,, etc. The Women's Health Initiative would be minor in comparison.

 

The complexity of this problem is mindboggling.

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Altostrata

Right, but in contrast my gyn immediately took her patients off the HRT combo and became very, very skeptical of all chemical cures. She loved Anatomy of an Epidemic.

 

(Note to self: Get her Pharmageddon as a gift next time I see her.)

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ceej

(ceej, what does *** mean?)

 

I was hoping you knew. I typed "***" and that's how it displayed. Part of the acronym problem?

In case it does it again in this post, it is the acronym for Health Maintenance Organization.

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Altostrata

LOL! The system has a British bad word checker. The oddest things end up being ***.

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peggy

I have thought about this a lot and am on the fence about being angry with psychiatrists. Maybe many of us here have been to bad ones, but there ARE a lot of good ones out there that don't prescribe liberally. They are TAUGHT the chemical myth, as being truth - the published research backs it up. Most of the research being undertaken is somehow linked to pharma so there should be no surprise that treatment is pharmacologically biased.

 

I used to think if only i hadn't taken effexor or if only i hadn't done XYZ...there is really no point in thinking that because I don't know what would happened - I was creating an idea that everything would have been rosy when i have no idea how my life may have unfolded...it may have been different, but not necessarily better.

 

I think the tide may change in the future, more and more doctors are becoming aware of AD's - the new local doctor i went to recently told me she rarely prescribes AD's anymore because of the problems people have coming off them - i was very encouraged to hear that.

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Jemima

Curiously, I don't read too many entries expressing anger at our previous doctors. I guess, relative to the nature of the sight, I can't think of too many posters who have shared many specifics of their doctor who first prescribed for them....

 

I wonder, to others, when you think of your doctor do you have feelings of anger or betrayal or sadness?

 

My predominant feeling is fear rather than anger, for three reasons:

 

1) Over the past two years, I've been misdiagnosed three times by three different doctors, two of them specialists, in the context of three serious conditions;

 

2) The off-label prescribing of antidepressants, antipsychotics, et cetera means that I'm going to have to second-guess every medication prescribed for me until the day I die. What if I'm unconscious or otherwise incapable or saying "NO!" at the time? Will I have to go through withdrawal hell again?; and

 

3) Given that I may need a diagnosis and medication at some future date, to whom do I turn? I no longer trust mainstream medicine, and while I've turned out to be talented at self-diagnosis I often take a long time to figure out what's wrong. Do I just lay down and die? I tend toward choosing this last option rather than receive inappropriate and likely painful or sickening treatment.

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Jemima

LOL! The system has a British bad word checker. The oddest things end up being ***.

 

Okay, I'm dying of curiosity. Could someone spell it out with maybe dashes in between the letters or something that can dodge the naughty word checker?

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jr1985

I'm mostly angry at the idiot doctor, who I rang in desperation, when I was going through acute withdrawal. I been to see a doctor from the same surgery that day, who prescribed citalopram. After taking it I felt MUCH worse, so I rang their office to ask for help because I didn't know what else to do, I was hoping they'd give me a benzo or something to take for a week or two while the side effects settled down. Anyway, he immediately had this really nasty tone and said I can't just keep calling here every 2 hours, even though I'd never called their emergency line before, and it had been 6 hours since I'd spoken to the other doctor and I felt a lot worse since then. I tried to explain the citalopram made me worse, but he kept saying "uh huh" in this sarcastic tone and basically told me to "man up", and that I should know these drugs make you feel worse since I always research everything. Well I did know that can make you feel worse but this was absolutely intolerable.

 

I suppose he did me a favour by not prescribing a benzo but he didn't have to be so nasty about it. I felt guilty, like I'd wasted his precious time.

 

As for it not being the doctors fault, sorry but they're supposed to keep up to date with the latest medical knowledge, they should know better. As far as I'm concerned, they're pharma's little puppets, prescribing whatever the sexy blonde drug rep tells them too.

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meistersinger

1346709655[/url]' post='31312']

I'm mostly angry at the idiot doctor, who I rang in desperation, when I was going through acute withdrawal. I been to see a doctor from the same surgery that day, who prescribed citalopram. After taking it I felt MUCH worse, so I rang their office to ask for help because I didn't know what else to do, I was hoping they'd give me a benzo or something to take for a week or two while the side effects settled down. Anyway, he immediately had this really nasty tone and said I can't just keep calling here every 2 hours, even though I'd never called their emergency line before, and it had been 6 hours since I'd spoken to the other doctor and I felt a lot worse since then. I tried to explain the citalopram made me worse, but he kept saying "uh huh" in this sarcastic tone and basically told me to "man up", and that I should know these drugs make you feel worse since I always research everything. Well I did know that can make you feel worse but this was absolutely intolerable.

 

I suppose he did me a favour by not prescribing a benzo but he didn't have to be so nasty about it. I felt guilty, like I'd wasted his precious time.

 

As for it not being the doctors fault, sorry but they're supposed to keep up to date with the latest medical knowledge, they should know better. As far as I'm concerned, they're pharma's little puppets, prescribing whatever the sexy blonde drug rep tells them too.

 

You ever try keeping up to date on anything? I have, and it's one of the reasons I went "crazy." Even in the fine arts, there's too much data (and there is a difference between data and information) to 1) keep up with it, and 2) discern what is fact and what is bull****. My very last assignment before I left the contract job at the Pentagon was to track ALL fixes and workarounds for Windows NT 4. THAT was definitely a 24/7/365 job, and most of the fixes were to applied if the system you were using exhibited those "bugs." When I tried to explain that to my supervisor, her response was it doesn't matter, because the brass is going to say apply the fixes regardless.

While I agree that a good many doctors shouldn't even be breathing, let alone practice medicine, a lot of them that could be excellent practicioners given the proper guidance, never get the chance because "the bean counters" that run everything nowadays, whether it be Pharma, the medical systems themselves, or even academia, only see $$$. Walt Kelly's cartoon character Pogo said it best: "We have met the enemy, and he is us." I can tell you truthfully, I am my own worst enemy most of the time. Why dto you think I ended up on antidepressants?

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Barbarannamated

Right, but in contrast my gyn immediately took her patients off the HRT combo and became very, very skeptical of all chemical cures. She loved Anatomy of an Epidemic.

 

I'm thinking of the complexity of tapering and withdrawal of hormones in comparison to SS/NRIs. I recall the announcement about the WHI being halted on the news, morning shows, etc, but dont know the exact advice on tapering. I suspect many cold-turkeyed or perhaps a few week taper. If they took similar action with SS/NRIs and advised according to current medical literature, it would be disastrous. The withdrawal from estrogen is not easy, either. I've been hit with withdrawal when a day or 2 late in changing a patch.

 

Your doc was smart. So many switched patients right to SSRIs at that time. Sickening.

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starlitegirlx

Doctors and big pharma are the problem. The only way to beat this is to come at it head on with you tube videos of people sharing their experiences, even if that means forgoing their privacy. Especially the ones with long term damages and withdrawal. Also, class action suits though I'm not sure if the HIPPA or what every it's called this days would block such a thing. Funny thing is I don't think it was created to protect us. I think it was created so big pharma could hide behind patient confidentiality.

 

Who cares about labels and what other people think if people who have gone through this can share their experiences enough to begin the ending of needlessly drugging people into more suffering and a premium price. These drugs aren't cheap! It really is time for a revolution and it has to begin with people who know the truth. Right now there are enough people who have gone through withdrawal to attest to it and I'm not talking about this site. I'm talking across the country. But people need to stop thinking that these meds are a cure all revolutionary thing and see them as dark ages medicine. Unfortunately, for a few decades now, drugging people has become the accepted norm and considered the enlightened. However, most don't know the damages done by them. You tube is great for getting the info out there. I know people don't want their privacy broken especially on this topic of all things, but big picture folks. Also, class action suits would be wise. If enough people come forward then it makes a difference. The only problem is the medical privacy acts which as one can see, are truly built to protect pharma more so than people. We're just numbers to them - $$$ to them. Remember the silicone implants that were killing women? Those women came forward. I'm sure they were ashamed for vanity costing them their health, but because of that, changes were made, as is the case with all things where changes are needed. People have to be willing to take a stand. Granted, most in withdrawal don't have the ability to deal with such things now, but it should be something considered at some point. Getting out there and putting yourself on youtube or writing blogs and starting a website gets to the top of engines is the only way to begin spreading the word. Then it will get picked up by the media at some point and that's where more people become aware. Right now, scientologists are the only group saying this and that is more damaging to us and our cause/plight than anything I could imagine as they're considered cult members who have been brainwashed by the majority of people who know about then and anyone on meds would immediately dismiss them. I know I did. Matt Lauer went after Tom Cruise in an interview and made him look nuts. But there is truth in the dangers of psychiatry and medicating people who would do better to learn coping tools to deal with depression and anxiety. Is there not one person on this site who wishes someone had worked with them to cope without the meds? I'm guess not!

 

A site like this is great for helping people, but if you want to stop more people from going through what we have and help more people who are going through withdrawal now or who want to get off their meds but every time they try, symptoms return because of withdrawal so they are convinced they need the meds, then we need to think bigger. The only way big change happens is from big actions. History attests to this fact. Right now, for those in withdrawal, big actions aren't possible, but at some point the big picture has to come into the scenario or this will continue due to ignorance, denial and greed.

 

If I had the kind of money to start this on a grand level, I would. I wish I did have that kind of money. What better to dedicate a fortune to than to save millions of people from suffering while flanking big pharma and making psychiatrists rethink their current way of practicing medicine (I use that term loosely).

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Shanti

All true. I think the best way is to always arm yourself with a lot of papers written by other doctors, as many as you can find. Credible ones. Doctors block this out more when it comes just from patients or if there aren't enough supporting reports from credible doctors. The reason is like what I said in the legalities of withholding treatment. Since these SSRIs are standard treatment for depression and anxiety, these doctors can literally be sued for malpractice if they don't prescribe them. For instance, if a patient tells a doctor they are depressed and the doctor refuses to give them the standard antidepressant for depression, and then that person either suicides or commits an act of violence, the family can sue the doctor for Malpractice or even wrongful death. Doctors are evens subject to involuntary manslaughter in withholding standard treatment. They are truly in a bind, so I can understand why many are afraid to see what their patients are saying. They need the information from many doctors. A good doctor will write papers about what they are observing and see what other doctors are writing about it. They have to take some action. But in the meantime, they are certainly liable for not prescribing these meds. But even with these reports from other doctors, firstly the doctor has to adhere to the stadards of treatment put out by agencies such as the AMA. It's a long and tricky process to get these things corrected, and as long as the FDA is corrupt, then it's hard to change the standard of treatment guides in other medical regulutory associations.

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Shanti

What is really biting me is how antidepressants are now the frontline standard for pain management. If I go to a doctor for pain, and he puts me on Vicodin instead of antidepressants, then he puts himself at great risk for losing his license or being sued. If I were to overdose on those opiates and my family sued the doctor, he'd have to answer the question "why didn't you stick to the standard of treatment by giving her antidepressants?" and he could lose it all. This is infuriating. I've had to really fight to get past the frontline treatment of antidepressants and into the older courses of treatment for pain management. Doctors don't like that.

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Barbarannamated

What is really biting me is how antidepressants are now the frontline standard for pain management. If I go to a doctor for pain, and he puts me on Vicodin instead of antidepressants, then he puts himself at great risk for losing his license or being sued. If I were to overdose on those opiates and my family sued the doctor, he'd have to answer the question "why didn't you stick to the standard of treatment by giving her antidepressants?" and he could lose it all. This is infuriating. I've had to really fight to get past the frontline treatment of antidepressants and into the older courses of treatment for pain management. Doctors don't like that.

 

Shanti,

 

You hit on my hot topic with this. I was treated succeszfully for years with opiates for chronic pain that also helped significantly for mood independent of pain. Then treatment changed with scare tactics concerning opiates and in support of SNRIs for pain.

 

I know what has helped me and when I was functional. I also know what was far easier to withdraw from: opiates. I believe the "war on drugs" is benefitting pharma and through use of more profitable, daily maintenance therapies.

 

Thank you for your input on the legalities of these issues, Shanti. Very enlightening.

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starlitegirlx

 

What is really biting me is how antidepressants are now the frontline standard for pain management. If I go to a doctor for pain, and he puts me on Vicodin instead of antidepressants, then he puts himself at great risk for losing his license or being sued. If I were to overdose on those opiates and my family sued the doctor, he'd have to answer the question "why didn't you stick to the standard of treatment by giving her antidepressants?" and he could lose it all. This is infuriating. I've had to really fight to get past the frontline treatment of antidepressants and into the older courses of treatment for pain management. Doctors don't like that.

 

Shanti,

 

You hit on my hot topic with this. I was treated succeszfully for years with opiates for chronic pain that also helped significantly for mood independent of pain. Then treatment changed with scare tactics concerning opiates and in support of SNRIs for pain.

 

I know what has helped me and when I was functional. I also know what was far easier to withdraw from: opiates. I believe the "war on drugs" is benefitting pharma and through use of more profitable, daily maintenance therapies.

 

Thank you for your input on the legalities of these issues, Shanti. Very enlightening.

 

I think big pharma is banking on what tobacco did. Addiction and changes to the system. Tobacco put additives into the mix. Pharma is using the SSRIs to pull people in and then when they try to go off, they experience withdrawal and stay on thinking they are experiencing the problem they thought or were told they had. Their depression could have been gone in weeks or months, but due to that SSRI addiction factor and the fact that few docs only prescribe them for months, you've not got yourself a nice little golden egg. And so of course now they're looking to expand beyond depression into other territories. Pretty soon we'll see SSRIs treating things that are absolutely unrelated.

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Shanti

Exactly! The whole system is corrupt at the roots, and I think what must be done is a huge doctor revolution. They'll all have to get together to take a stand and make changes getting the proffesion out of the hands of Big Pharma. It's totally corrupted. I do feel for many doctors, like my own, that does take a stand and refuses to prescribe Paxil and Effexor. I know it can't be easy. My last doctor was stressed. She also told me that they could get into a lot of trouble not following standards. I didn't know how serious it was until I took the Medical Law course. My new doctor is braver.

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