Wolfhound Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 Olivia, I have been reading your thread from time to time. I want to add one thing, the recovery isn´t a simple process. I mean, when you read the most known WD story by a Dutch? guy, his recovery took about 12 years if I am not mistaken. Don´t loose hope. Put on trazadone for 8 weeks. Psychic akathisia started on 100 mg. Not a single doctor believed me telling me it is all anxiety in my head. Terrible suicidal urges. Got voluntary hospitalised. Acknoledged adverse reaction, put me off cold turkey. Instalated mirtazapine to block the reaction of trazadone. 5 weeks on mirtazapine.acathisia worsened, suicidal, homicidal urges. Nobody believed. Finally they stopped mirtazapine cold turkey. My heighest dose of trazadone was 200 mg, of mirtazapine 30 mg. Since the c/t, suicidal, acathisia continuing. tried promethazine for sleep. Tried atarax. Currently taking klonopin for 10 days. Good for sleep, but my condition worsening. Unable to tell if it is klonopin or a bad wave. In the former hospital i took twice gabapentin. It should be all my medication. i was offered promethazin for sleep 25 mg and also small amount of quetiapine. Both are antipsychotics, even if ptomethszin very weak. Terribly afraid. Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted November 25, 2014 Administrator Share Posted November 25, 2014 It was 7 years, and he recovered completely. Olivia, we do not lock threads when people leave the site. Please follow these instructions http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/246-how-to-use-this-site-questions-and-answers/?p=63344 Good healing to you. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
Muddles Posted November 26, 2014 Share Posted November 26, 2014 Where can I find the Dutch guy story please? I need hope. 2008 - Doctors appointment with stress induced anxiety led to Citalopram prescription. Severe adverse reaction Mirtazapine prescribed - adverse reaction but told to stay on. Poop out - December 2013 15mg Currently on 13.5mg, April 12mg May 10th - 11mg June 10th - 10mg July 8th - 9mg September - 0mg Link to comment
Member cymbaltawithdrawal5600 Posted November 26, 2014 Member Share Posted November 26, 2014 Here ya go, Muddles: CG's story. What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878 July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site. Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey. Link to comment
NoMeaning25 Posted December 24, 2014 Author Share Posted December 24, 2014 Name change request to NoMeaning25 please Was on Citalopram 20mg since Feb 2008 - switched to Paxil 20mg in August 2010 Tapered way too fast in April 2012 by skipping days. Taper completed in 6 weeks Tried prozac 20mg for 3 days - felt spaced out, not better. Tried 30mg Cymbalta for 2 days. SEVERE ADVERSE REACTION Antidepressant free since 14 August 2012 Birth control on and off during this time - Last taken 18 June 2017 - Morning after pill Started mainly using 0.5mg Xanax beginning 2016 for severe panic attacks and anxiety due to trauma Xanax on and off never more than 0.5mg at a time, never taking it 3 days in a row - used sparingly 6 Years antidepressant free - Still in severe withdrawal with over 60 symptoms Severe setback started May 2018 with no let up to date. Developed many new symptoms like tremors, inner vibrations, insomnia, visual distortions and dr/dp are 100x worse, i have severe sensitivity to movement, My dizziness and vertigo got worse and it now feels like im constantly rocking on a boat, my anxiety is sky high, suicidal idiation is back, i feel extremely brain damaged Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus mammaP Posted December 24, 2014 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted December 24, 2014 Olivia, Alto is the only one who can change names and is extremely busy. You would have to send her a pm but please understand that she is going all out and has a lot of work on right now. See this post in questions. Posted 14 November 2014 - 08:11 PM About screen name changes When you register, please choose a screen name that protects your identity. Unless you want family and friends to recognize your posts, do not tell them your screen name on SurvivingAntidepressants.org. We minimize the changing of screen names - To save work for the administrators (particularly me). - To maintain a stable community, where people get to know you by your screen name and may be confused if it changes. We will change screen names primarily for privacy reasons: - If your screen name can be easily found in Google and tied to your real name. (This applies mostly to people who have used their surnames or family names as screen names.) - If your screen name is the same as the one you use on social media. Use of a first name as a screen name usually does not qualify as a privacy concern. A first name would have to be so unique it could be found quickly in Google AND related to your real name. For example, there are many, many people in the world named Sandeep. If your real name and screen name are Sandeep, it's unlikely anyone who knows you would be able to find your posts on SurvivingAntidepressants.org via Google and attribute them to who you are in real life. **I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge. Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem) 1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat 2002 effexor. Tapered March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads. Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013 Restarted taper Nov 2013 OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015 Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014 Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg July 2017 30mg. May 15 2018 25mg Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33 Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted December 24, 2014 Administrator Share Posted December 24, 2014 Name change made. Limited-time offer for former paxilprogress.org members who want to use their old screen names. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
NoMeaning25 Posted December 24, 2014 Author Share Posted December 24, 2014 Thank you. Much appreciated Was on Citalopram 20mg since Feb 2008 - switched to Paxil 20mg in August 2010 Tapered way too fast in April 2012 by skipping days. Taper completed in 6 weeks Tried prozac 20mg for 3 days - felt spaced out, not better. Tried 30mg Cymbalta for 2 days. SEVERE ADVERSE REACTION Antidepressant free since 14 August 2012 Birth control on and off during this time - Last taken 18 June 2017 - Morning after pill Started mainly using 0.5mg Xanax beginning 2016 for severe panic attacks and anxiety due to trauma Xanax on and off never more than 0.5mg at a time, never taking it 3 days in a row - used sparingly 6 Years antidepressant free - Still in severe withdrawal with over 60 symptoms Severe setback started May 2018 with no let up to date. Developed many new symptoms like tremors, inner vibrations, insomnia, visual distortions and dr/dp are 100x worse, i have severe sensitivity to movement, My dizziness and vertigo got worse and it now feels like im constantly rocking on a boat, my anxiety is sky high, suicidal idiation is back, i feel extremely brain damaged Link to comment
NoMeaning25 Posted December 25, 2014 Author Share Posted December 25, 2014 I don't know if I can still get support here, I'm in a very severe wave right now and could really do with some support right now :-( Holidays alays set me off big time. When will this get better now Was on Citalopram 20mg since Feb 2008 - switched to Paxil 20mg in August 2010 Tapered way too fast in April 2012 by skipping days. Taper completed in 6 weeks Tried prozac 20mg for 3 days - felt spaced out, not better. Tried 30mg Cymbalta for 2 days. SEVERE ADVERSE REACTION Antidepressant free since 14 August 2012 Birth control on and off during this time - Last taken 18 June 2017 - Morning after pill Started mainly using 0.5mg Xanax beginning 2016 for severe panic attacks and anxiety due to trauma Xanax on and off never more than 0.5mg at a time, never taking it 3 days in a row - used sparingly 6 Years antidepressant free - Still in severe withdrawal with over 60 symptoms Severe setback started May 2018 with no let up to date. Developed many new symptoms like tremors, inner vibrations, insomnia, visual distortions and dr/dp are 100x worse, i have severe sensitivity to movement, My dizziness and vertigo got worse and it now feels like im constantly rocking on a boat, my anxiety is sky high, suicidal idiation is back, i feel extremely brain damaged Link to comment
Muddles Posted December 25, 2014 Share Posted December 25, 2014 Holidays are the worst because they remind us of just how sick we are and how we were before the devastation hit. I'm so sorry, just know I am thinking of you and pray for better days. 2008 - Doctors appointment with stress induced anxiety led to Citalopram prescription. Severe adverse reaction Mirtazapine prescribed - adverse reaction but told to stay on. Poop out - December 2013 15mg Currently on 13.5mg, April 12mg May 10th - 11mg June 10th - 10mg July 8th - 9mg September - 0mg Link to comment
WinningThrough Posted December 25, 2014 Share Posted December 25, 2014 Thinking of you. I so hope you get a window some day soon. The only way out is through. Aug 2013 - Augmentin leading to akathisia Sept-Nov 2013 - Citalopram 20mg, severe reaction, off at 5mg. Valium 4mg, prn Oct 2013 - 5 zopiclone tablets, 7.5mg End Nov 2013-end Feb 2014, Seroquel, top dose 150mg, off at 25mg End Nov 2013-early march 2014, Zoloft 100mg top dose, off at 25mg End Dec-2013-early April 2014, lorazepam 1mg prn April 3rd 2014 zoloft 5mg for a few days. 18/4/14 - zoloft, 1mg. Came off at 0.35 mg,14th June 2014 29 June 2014 - 1mg lorazepam, last ever 29 June 2014 - med free Link to comment
Member cymbaltawithdrawal5600 Posted December 25, 2014 Member Share Posted December 25, 2014 I don't know if I can still get support here, I'm in a very severe wave right now and could really do with some support right now :-( We have always attempted to support you here. Perhaps you could help us out and fill in a signature. Instructions are here: See how to create a signature here http://survivinganti...your-signature/ mammaP carries them in her signature 'pocket' everywhere she goes on this site. If you have one, that makes it so much easier for mods and members alike to know what to say to advise you. What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878 July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site. Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey. Link to comment
tgirl Posted December 25, 2014 Share Posted December 25, 2014 Hello oliva, Holidays are a rough period! You can always get support here. I'm sorry you are in a bad wave right now. It helps if you look back to your last window. I know it seams a tease, but it does help me at times. you will get through it! Good thoughts, Tina April 2014 remeron 45mg. June 2014 abilify 2.5 remeron wasn't working so abilify was then added September 2014 woke up with anxiety x 100!!!! Pdoc then took me from 45 to 7.5 within a month and took abilify from 2.5 to 0 Currently Remeron 7.5 Vitamin d 5,000 iu taking for about 3 years October 2014 added fish oil/omega 3 1000 mg per day Levothyroxitine 100 10 years or so Dec 2014 started tapering 10% every 10 days-no problems. August 2015 down to 0.1 mg Woke up with severe anxiety-sleep issues-racing thoughts-depression. 9/9/15 up dose 1 mg. Link to comment
Wildflower0214 Posted December 25, 2014 Share Posted December 25, 2014 Glad to see you back. I hope this wave passes very very very quickly. I'm so sorry for you Olivia. Hang in there. 2005-Zoloft bad reaction.....2006-Lexepro......2012-Upped Lexepro.......2013-Upped Lexepro......2/2014- Attempted Taper Lexepro...2/2014- Updosed Lexepro.......3/2014-Ativan.....5/2014- CT switch from Lexpro to Effexor..... 5/2014-7/2014-Tapered Ativan from 1mg to .25mg.....6/2014-Bad reaction to Effexor........7/2014- Rapid taper Effexor every other day......7/5/2014- Off Effexor.......7/2014-12/2014 - Ativan .25mg.......12/25/2014 -Taper Ativan by 4% due to paradoxical reaction .24mg...11/18/2015-Taper Ativan 1% CURRENTLY ON: .2376mg Ativan taken in 6 .0396mg doses. Link to comment
NoMeaning25 Posted December 31, 2014 Author Share Posted December 31, 2014 Updated my signature Cymbalthawithdrawal5600 I did not want to put up my signature, because of various factors. If you had read through my Journal you would have seen WHY i dont want to, maybe you would've not been so ugly to me. Was on Citalopram 20mg since Feb 2008 - switched to Paxil 20mg in August 2010 Tapered way too fast in April 2012 by skipping days. Taper completed in 6 weeks Tried prozac 20mg for 3 days - felt spaced out, not better. Tried 30mg Cymbalta for 2 days. SEVERE ADVERSE REACTION Antidepressant free since 14 August 2012 Birth control on and off during this time - Last taken 18 June 2017 - Morning after pill Started mainly using 0.5mg Xanax beginning 2016 for severe panic attacks and anxiety due to trauma Xanax on and off never more than 0.5mg at a time, never taking it 3 days in a row - used sparingly 6 Years antidepressant free - Still in severe withdrawal with over 60 symptoms Severe setback started May 2018 with no let up to date. Developed many new symptoms like tremors, inner vibrations, insomnia, visual distortions and dr/dp are 100x worse, i have severe sensitivity to movement, My dizziness and vertigo got worse and it now feels like im constantly rocking on a boat, my anxiety is sky high, suicidal idiation is back, i feel extremely brain damaged Link to comment
NoMeaning25 Posted December 31, 2014 Author Share Posted December 31, 2014 Hello everyone I have decided to leave the forums for good this time. I will try my best not to read this site anymore. Maybe one day I will recover. In that i case i make a promise that i will come back and let everyone know. I know everyone thinks and says this, but i am a very severe case, maybe one of the most severe cases out there. I only found a small handful of people who were as severe as me, and sadly they are not recovered yet at 10-14 years off. Maybe this year i will turn the corner, maybe not. Ive been in severe agony and despair for 28.5 months. My first and only window was in December 2012, i had a semi-window for a few days where i felt 50% better. after that it has just been pure hell on earth with SEVERE depersonalization and 60+ other symptoms non stop 24/7 without any breaks or improvements. I know there is nothing anyone on this board can say to make me feel any better and i definitely don't want to cause a big pity party. I don't know what lies ahead this 2015. All i can hope and pray for is that God has mercy on my very frightened, damaged soul and that somehow, just somehow i can get better. Others who came off the same time as me are now doing so much better and mostly recovered. I feel left behind and this is just bringing me down and i am hurting so much. I've had to endure more than most people on these boards. My outcome isn't looking so rosy anymore. Thank you for all the support and encouragement i have received through the years. I appreciate it very much. I hope you guys dont forget about me because i sure will never forget anyone on here. Good bye and i hope 2015 brings much healing to all Was on Citalopram 20mg since Feb 2008 - switched to Paxil 20mg in August 2010 Tapered way too fast in April 2012 by skipping days. Taper completed in 6 weeks Tried prozac 20mg for 3 days - felt spaced out, not better. Tried 30mg Cymbalta for 2 days. SEVERE ADVERSE REACTION Antidepressant free since 14 August 2012 Birth control on and off during this time - Last taken 18 June 2017 - Morning after pill Started mainly using 0.5mg Xanax beginning 2016 for severe panic attacks and anxiety due to trauma Xanax on and off never more than 0.5mg at a time, never taking it 3 days in a row - used sparingly 6 Years antidepressant free - Still in severe withdrawal with over 60 symptoms Severe setback started May 2018 with no let up to date. Developed many new symptoms like tremors, inner vibrations, insomnia, visual distortions and dr/dp are 100x worse, i have severe sensitivity to movement, My dizziness and vertigo got worse and it now feels like im constantly rocking on a boat, my anxiety is sky high, suicidal idiation is back, i feel extremely brain damaged Link to comment
Muddles Posted January 14, 2015 Share Posted January 14, 2015 No meaning - I have tried to message you but cant. I wanted to ask you a few questions regarding dp/dr. 2008 - Doctors appointment with stress induced anxiety led to Citalopram prescription. Severe adverse reaction Mirtazapine prescribed - adverse reaction but told to stay on. Poop out - December 2013 15mg Currently on 13.5mg, April 12mg May 10th - 11mg June 10th - 10mg July 8th - 9mg September - 0mg Link to comment
Member cymbaltawithdrawal5600 Posted January 14, 2015 Member Share Posted January 14, 2015 Muddles, please read the message above. She does not want to visit the forum anymore though I suspect she may be following her topic anonymously. What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878 July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site. Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey. Link to comment
Muddles Posted January 14, 2015 Share Posted January 14, 2015 Ok - thanks cymbalta 2008 - Doctors appointment with stress induced anxiety led to Citalopram prescription. Severe adverse reaction Mirtazapine prescribed - adverse reaction but told to stay on. Poop out - December 2013 15mg Currently on 13.5mg, April 12mg May 10th - 11mg June 10th - 10mg July 8th - 9mg September - 0mg Link to comment
NoMeaning25 Posted January 21, 2015 Author Share Posted January 21, 2015 Sorry to disappoint you, but i haven't been following my topic anonymously Muddles, please read the message above. She does not want to visit the forum anymore though I suspect she may be following her topic anonymously. Was on Citalopram 20mg since Feb 2008 - switched to Paxil 20mg in August 2010 Tapered way too fast in April 2012 by skipping days. Taper completed in 6 weeks Tried prozac 20mg for 3 days - felt spaced out, not better. Tried 30mg Cymbalta for 2 days. SEVERE ADVERSE REACTION Antidepressant free since 14 August 2012 Birth control on and off during this time - Last taken 18 June 2017 - Morning after pill Started mainly using 0.5mg Xanax beginning 2016 for severe panic attacks and anxiety due to trauma Xanax on and off never more than 0.5mg at a time, never taking it 3 days in a row - used sparingly 6 Years antidepressant free - Still in severe withdrawal with over 60 symptoms Severe setback started May 2018 with no let up to date. Developed many new symptoms like tremors, inner vibrations, insomnia, visual distortions and dr/dp are 100x worse, i have severe sensitivity to movement, My dizziness and vertigo got worse and it now feels like im constantly rocking on a boat, my anxiety is sky high, suicidal idiation is back, i feel extremely brain damaged Link to comment
NoMeaning25 Posted January 21, 2015 Author Share Posted January 21, 2015 No meaning - I have tried to message you but cant. I wanted to ask you a few questions regarding dp/dr. Send me a PM and i will forward you my email address. I wont be logging into SA again (Or following "Anonymously") Was on Citalopram 20mg since Feb 2008 - switched to Paxil 20mg in August 2010 Tapered way too fast in April 2012 by skipping days. Taper completed in 6 weeks Tried prozac 20mg for 3 days - felt spaced out, not better. Tried 30mg Cymbalta for 2 days. SEVERE ADVERSE REACTION Antidepressant free since 14 August 2012 Birth control on and off during this time - Last taken 18 June 2017 - Morning after pill Started mainly using 0.5mg Xanax beginning 2016 for severe panic attacks and anxiety due to trauma Xanax on and off never more than 0.5mg at a time, never taking it 3 days in a row - used sparingly 6 Years antidepressant free - Still in severe withdrawal with over 60 symptoms Severe setback started May 2018 with no let up to date. Developed many new symptoms like tremors, inner vibrations, insomnia, visual distortions and dr/dp are 100x worse, i have severe sensitivity to movement, My dizziness and vertigo got worse and it now feels like im constantly rocking on a boat, my anxiety is sky high, suicidal idiation is back, i feel extremely brain damaged Link to comment
NoMeaning25 Posted February 26, 2015 Author Share Posted February 26, 2015 Dear Lord, please help me. I am suffering so much 24/7 on top of life circumstances. Please. Please. Is 30 months of extreme torture not enough? Please I just want to feel better :'( I am so scared and alone. I need to help my mom because she is ill and all that I have. I can't help her because I am too ill myself. Please Lord Was on Citalopram 20mg since Feb 2008 - switched to Paxil 20mg in August 2010 Tapered way too fast in April 2012 by skipping days. Taper completed in 6 weeks Tried prozac 20mg for 3 days - felt spaced out, not better. Tried 30mg Cymbalta for 2 days. SEVERE ADVERSE REACTION Antidepressant free since 14 August 2012 Birth control on and off during this time - Last taken 18 June 2017 - Morning after pill Started mainly using 0.5mg Xanax beginning 2016 for severe panic attacks and anxiety due to trauma Xanax on and off never more than 0.5mg at a time, never taking it 3 days in a row - used sparingly 6 Years antidepressant free - Still in severe withdrawal with over 60 symptoms Severe setback started May 2018 with no let up to date. Developed many new symptoms like tremors, inner vibrations, insomnia, visual distortions and dr/dp are 100x worse, i have severe sensitivity to movement, My dizziness and vertigo got worse and it now feels like im constantly rocking on a boat, my anxiety is sky high, suicidal idiation is back, i feel extremely brain damaged Link to comment
imac Posted March 3, 2015 Share Posted March 3, 2015 Dear Lord, please help me. I am suffering so much 24/7 on top of life circumstances. Please. Please. Is 30 months of extreme torture not enough? Please I just want to feel better :'( I am so scared and alone. I need to help my mom because she is ill and all that I have. I can't help her because I am too ill myself. Please Lord I'm so sorry nomeaning! You're in my prayers. I know exactly where you are. I was there too. I pray for for relief for you!! 13 years of Ssri's - celexa, Paxil, Prozac, Zoloft 2 fast tapers and 2 cold turkeys over the years Psych med free since September 4th 2011 - fast tapered then CT'd 12.5 mg of Zoloft “Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will.” ― Mahatma Gandhi Link to comment
Wildflower0214 Posted March 3, 2015 Share Posted March 3, 2015 Praying for you. I hope you get some relief very very soon. 2005-Zoloft bad reaction.....2006-Lexepro......2012-Upped Lexepro.......2013-Upped Lexepro......2/2014- Attempted Taper Lexepro...2/2014- Updosed Lexepro.......3/2014-Ativan.....5/2014- CT switch from Lexpro to Effexor..... 5/2014-7/2014-Tapered Ativan from 1mg to .25mg.....6/2014-Bad reaction to Effexor........7/2014- Rapid taper Effexor every other day......7/5/2014- Off Effexor.......7/2014-12/2014 - Ativan .25mg.......12/25/2014 -Taper Ativan by 4% due to paradoxical reaction .24mg...11/18/2015-Taper Ativan 1% CURRENTLY ON: .2376mg Ativan taken in 6 .0396mg doses. Link to comment
NoMeaning25 Posted June 29, 2016 Author Share Posted June 29, 2016 I will be 4 years off soon - Still no improvements but actually I am worsening with more symptoms just keep adding up. I have over 60 symptoms. Over half of them in extreme severity - I live in hell everyday. I am 27 years old and taking no medication, i do not have any chronic disorders or illnesses. The last medication i took was in August 2012. Some of the symptoms i am dealing with 24/7 is: Severe DR/DP, Dizziness, vertigo, brainfog, severe visual distortions, sever anxiety panic attacks and severe depression, tremors, inner vibrations, overall sick feeling, feeling drugged up, severe ear ringing, ears blocked permanently, throat clicks and battle to swallow etc etc My life is hell. I cannot function anymore. I just cry all day. I have nothing to live for and i cannot see myself getting out of this. I am not able to take supplements of any kind or do any exercise. 4 years of this hell. Surely this cannot be normal? How long must i still "wait" put my life on hold, suffer? 10 years? 20 years? Im not being negative or wallowing in my sorrows, but surely 4 years is long enough??? Im really beginning to loose hope and i am desperate for relief. Ive had no windows or feeling even 1% better in 4 years. Why? Is there something wrong with me? Am i being punished? If anyone has any recommendations i would really appreciate My history: 02/2008-10/2010 - Citalopram 20mg Sometime in 2009 - Doctor switched to 40mg for around 4/5 months - Side effects, went back down to 20mg10/2010-05/2012 - Paxil 20mg 6 Week taper22-24/11/2011 - Valium for sleep paralysis caused by chemist dispensing different brand of Paxil 15-18/07/2012 - Prozac 20mg 21-22/07/2012 - Cymbalta 30mg SEVERE ADVERSE REACTION Xanax 0.25mg for 4 days for extreme akathisia caused by the adverse reaction27/07/2012-13/08/2012 - Reinstate Paxil 5mg14/08/2012 - Psychotropic Drug Free Was on Citalopram 20mg since Feb 2008 - switched to Paxil 20mg in August 2010 Tapered way too fast in April 2012 by skipping days. Taper completed in 6 weeks Tried prozac 20mg for 3 days - felt spaced out, not better. Tried 30mg Cymbalta for 2 days. SEVERE ADVERSE REACTION Antidepressant free since 14 August 2012 Birth control on and off during this time - Last taken 18 June 2017 - Morning after pill Started mainly using 0.5mg Xanax beginning 2016 for severe panic attacks and anxiety due to trauma Xanax on and off never more than 0.5mg at a time, never taking it 3 days in a row - used sparingly 6 Years antidepressant free - Still in severe withdrawal with over 60 symptoms Severe setback started May 2018 with no let up to date. Developed many new symptoms like tremors, inner vibrations, insomnia, visual distortions and dr/dp are 100x worse, i have severe sensitivity to movement, My dizziness and vertigo got worse and it now feels like im constantly rocking on a boat, my anxiety is sky high, suicidal idiation is back, i feel extremely brain damaged Link to comment
NoMeaning25 Posted December 21, 2019 Author Share Posted December 21, 2019 I am one of the few people that has been suffering quite severe protracted withdrawal. During the years ive had many testing done and nothing could be found. Until now. The prolonged withdrawal and trauma of it all caused my adrenal glands to stop functioning optimally. I now suffer from end stage adrenal fatigue or HPA Axis dysfunction. My 4 point cortisol is all super low. The severe gut issues caused malabsorption of nutrients and now im severely B12 deficient. And unable to tlerate b12 supplementation. The prolonged suffering and the fatigued adrenals caused my hormones to get imbalanced and so now im suffering from estrogen dominance. I think its important to note the impact of protracted withdrawal in some individuals and the auto immune diseases that can prevail in some during protracted withdrawal. Through my 7 year journey i have found that length of time on medication doesnt matter, age doesnt matter. I dont know if i was just predisponed to develop PAWS or if trauma from other sources had an impact. Was on Citalopram 20mg since Feb 2008 - switched to Paxil 20mg in August 2010 Tapered way too fast in April 2012 by skipping days. Taper completed in 6 weeks Tried prozac 20mg for 3 days - felt spaced out, not better. Tried 30mg Cymbalta for 2 days. SEVERE ADVERSE REACTION Antidepressant free since 14 August 2012 Birth control on and off during this time - Last taken 18 June 2017 - Morning after pill Started mainly using 0.5mg Xanax beginning 2016 for severe panic attacks and anxiety due to trauma Xanax on and off never more than 0.5mg at a time, never taking it 3 days in a row - used sparingly 6 Years antidepressant free - Still in severe withdrawal with over 60 symptoms Severe setback started May 2018 with no let up to date. Developed many new symptoms like tremors, inner vibrations, insomnia, visual distortions and dr/dp are 100x worse, i have severe sensitivity to movement, My dizziness and vertigo got worse and it now feels like im constantly rocking on a boat, my anxiety is sky high, suicidal idiation is back, i feel extremely brain damaged Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted December 21, 2019 Administrator Share Posted December 21, 2019 Nomeaning, as you have not been posting in your Intro topic, we don't have any background on what happened over the last few years. Vitamin B12 deficiency can be a serious condition. You can build up tolerance for B12 supplementation: Get 500mcg sublingual methylcobalamin tablets, take a tiny chip of one every day, gradually build up to larger chips. Over time, you will be able to take 1000mcg per day, which is the usual supplementation dosage. Some of your symptoms may not be due to prolonged withdrawal syndrome (PAWS). Vitamin B12 deficiency is not related. Your description of your symptoms indicates you are getting naturopathic diagnoses and, supposedly, treatment. You may in fact be suffering medical conditions such as gut erosion, food intolerance, h. pylori infection, etc. You may be experiencing some kind of adrenal condition, such as Cushing's or Addison's. Our ability to counsel about medical conditions is very limited here. Please seek medical help for what may be your medical conditions. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
NoMeaning25 Posted December 22, 2019 Author Share Posted December 22, 2019 Im not on any treatment, as i have never been able to tolerate a single supplement since i stopped paxil. My intro is still hidden, you may unhide it if you wish. I got symptoms as soon as i stopped antidepressants. Which has never left me. I thought that would indicate protracted withdrawal. I dont have addisons or cushing syndrome. My lab work and all testing is normal except b12 is low and my cortisol is low which might be indirectly related. I have had the same gut issues since the moment i stopped paxil. No infections or problems can be found. Was on Citalopram 20mg since Feb 2008 - switched to Paxil 20mg in August 2010 Tapered way too fast in April 2012 by skipping days. Taper completed in 6 weeks Tried prozac 20mg for 3 days - felt spaced out, not better. Tried 30mg Cymbalta for 2 days. SEVERE ADVERSE REACTION Antidepressant free since 14 August 2012 Birth control on and off during this time - Last taken 18 June 2017 - Morning after pill Started mainly using 0.5mg Xanax beginning 2016 for severe panic attacks and anxiety due to trauma Xanax on and off never more than 0.5mg at a time, never taking it 3 days in a row - used sparingly 6 Years antidepressant free - Still in severe withdrawal with over 60 symptoms Severe setback started May 2018 with no let up to date. Developed many new symptoms like tremors, inner vibrations, insomnia, visual distortions and dr/dp are 100x worse, i have severe sensitivity to movement, My dizziness and vertigo got worse and it now feels like im constantly rocking on a boat, my anxiety is sky high, suicidal idiation is back, i feel extremely brain damaged Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted December 22, 2019 Administrator Share Posted December 22, 2019 You might have post-acute withdrawal syndrome, but vitamin B12 deficiency is a medical condition not related to PAWS. It can have far-ranging neurological symptoms. If I were you, I'd try tiny chips of a B12 supplement and build up. Cortisol measurement is not a common medical test. Did you have a 24-hour urine test? If it shows your cortisol level is low, you need to talk to an endocrinologist. If you did not have a 24-hour urine test but a saliva test or something, it's not valid. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus arbor Posted September 5, 2021 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted September 5, 2021 Hi @NoMeaning25 How are you doing? I hope things are improving for you. Best wishes, Arbor Zoloft: 1995 - 2015 Prozac: 2015 - 2018 (tapered from 40mg x day on July 31 to 30mg on August 31 to 20mg on September 31 to 10mg October 31 to 0mg on December 15, 2018 Gabapentin: 2016 to 2019 (tapered from 300mg x day to 150mg on August 31, 2019 to 75mg on September 15 to 50mg on September 31 to 25ishmg on October 15 to 0mg on December 1, 2019 Enalapril: 2010 - 2019 Lipitor: 2017 -2017 Metformin: 2000 - 2020 Liothyronine: 2007 - 2019 Levothyroxine: 2000 - 2022 Link to comment
NoMeaning25 Posted April 25, 2023 Author Share Posted April 25, 2023 On 9/5/2021 at 9:21 PM, arbor said: Hi @NoMeaning25 How are you doing? I hope things are improving for you. Best wishes, Arbor Hi, still not improved. Idk why. Ive had extensive testing done recently and every single test came back normal. My b12 is back to normal, cortisol back to normal. Everything is fine but i still feel like im dying. Since the first day i stopped paxil. I dont know how this is possible 🤷🏼♀️ hopefully ill eventually get better, and ill report here. Waiting and praying for a miracle. 2 Was on Citalopram 20mg since Feb 2008 - switched to Paxil 20mg in August 2010 Tapered way too fast in April 2012 by skipping days. Taper completed in 6 weeks Tried prozac 20mg for 3 days - felt spaced out, not better. Tried 30mg Cymbalta for 2 days. SEVERE ADVERSE REACTION Antidepressant free since 14 August 2012 Birth control on and off during this time - Last taken 18 June 2017 - Morning after pill Started mainly using 0.5mg Xanax beginning 2016 for severe panic attacks and anxiety due to trauma Xanax on and off never more than 0.5mg at a time, never taking it 3 days in a row - used sparingly 6 Years antidepressant free - Still in severe withdrawal with over 60 symptoms Severe setback started May 2018 with no let up to date. Developed many new symptoms like tremors, inner vibrations, insomnia, visual distortions and dr/dp are 100x worse, i have severe sensitivity to movement, My dizziness and vertigo got worse and it now feels like im constantly rocking on a boat, my anxiety is sky high, suicidal idiation is back, i feel extremely brain damaged Link to comment
direstraits Posted April 25, 2023 Share Posted April 25, 2023 I'm sorry you're still suffering... I am too 😔 Paxil is evil 😖 1 went on Prozac 1994-99,60mg.poopout ct back on 2001-2002,prozac weekly 2002,not working,Effexor 75 mg.?2003-mar.2004 gaining weight 8wk. taper,wellbutrin 150 mg.mar. -may 2004 ctmedfree til july 2005 back to Prozac gaining weight again,back on wellbutrin jan.2006150-300 mg.bad constipation.also was taking aygestin(hormone)perimenopausal irregular bleeding.back on Prozac around sept,?2006,hysterectomy jan30.2007(adenomyosis)off&on Prozac til 2009,citalopram about 1 mo, April 2010 no effect,Effexor again may -mar, 2011.ct,Prozac aug,-dec, 2011 &sept-nov 2012,paroxetine oct,23 2013-may 4 2014 20 mgs.tapered 6 wks.-failed RI in Oct.2014-in protracted WD.started 10 mgs. Fluoxetine May 25 2021 .Stopped fluoxetine May 2022 at 5 mgs. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus arbor Posted April 26, 2023 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted April 26, 2023 Dear @NoMeaning25 It's good to hear from you. Recovery can take such an awfully long time. It's in you though--hang in there. In the meantime. I'm sorry you're having to go through this. @direstraitsis right--these drugs are evil I send you healing wishes, Arbor 1 Zoloft: 1995 - 2015 Prozac: 2015 - 2018 (tapered from 40mg x day on July 31 to 30mg on August 31 to 20mg on September 31 to 10mg October 31 to 0mg on December 15, 2018 Gabapentin: 2016 to 2019 (tapered from 300mg x day to 150mg on August 31, 2019 to 75mg on September 15 to 50mg on September 31 to 25ishmg on October 15 to 0mg on December 1, 2019 Enalapril: 2010 - 2019 Lipitor: 2017 -2017 Metformin: 2000 - 2020 Liothyronine: 2007 - 2019 Levothyroxine: 2000 - 2022 Link to comment
18yoldoffZoloft Posted May 17, 2023 Share Posted May 17, 2023 On 4/25/2023 at 10:55 AM, NoMeaning25 said: Hi, still not improved. Idk why. Ive had extensive testing done recently and every single test came back normal. My b12 is back to normal, cortisol back to normal. Everything is fine but i still feel like im dying. Since the first day i stopped paxil. I dont know how this is possible 🤷🏼♀️ hopefully ill eventually get better, and ill report here. Waiting and praying for a miracle. Im sorry you're still suffering I read your entire thread :(( Has anything at all improved for you? 2021 Apr: zoloft 50mg eventually up to 200mg 2022 Oct: zoloft quick taper down to 50 mg (Nov) quit at 50mg mid-Nov 2022 late Dec - Feb 15 '23: ativan 0.5 mg-1mg on and off 2022 Dec 30 - Jan 20: zoloft 75mg for 3-ish weeks 2023 Jan 24: prozac 20mg taken 4 days (bad reaction) 2023 Jan 27: mirtazipine 15mg | (TRIED SWITCHING TO 25mg or 50mg ZOLOFT FROM FEB 12-13 WHILE ON MIRTAZIPINE, bad reaction) | Feb 13-15 '23: 30 mg | Feb 16-18: 15 mg, Feb 19 - current: 7.5mg -Since mid-Jan have taken a number of sleep pills only once and Gabapentin (200-600 mg) taken as needed, have tried CBD on and off, fish oil, antibiotics for UTI -Since Feb 19 I have taken only 7.5mg Mirtazipine and the occasional fish oil, nothing else Link to comment
Soup Posted May 17, 2023 Share Posted May 17, 2023 @NoMeaning25 do you still take Xanax ? On Prozac 20 mg from 1996 to 2012 started for post partum depression ? Pooped out 2012 - Switched to 1.25 mg Klonopin ( tapered off last dose march 6 th / 2017 ( 14 month taper) 2012-15 mg lexapro came off nov.4 th /17 2012- 150 mg Wellbutrin xl ( still on ) 2019- Stabilized to be functional after coming off lex and klon waiting to get healthy to taper Wellbutrin 2021 Dec - Suprax and macrobid for UTI 2022 Jan - withdrawal symptoms came back with a vengeance ( antibiotics and uti only change ) 2022 June - still in full withdrawal Link to comment
CloudyToday Posted May 19, 2023 Share Posted May 19, 2023 Hi @NoMeaning25, You mentioned you had a setback on May 2018. Were you gradually getting better before this setback? 2017 - 2018 Lexapro (CT, no withdrawals) 2018 - 2019 Zoloft (CT, no withdrawals) 2/15/21 - paxil 20mg 5/1/22 - started fast tapter, 10mg 3 weeks, 5mg 3 weeks, 0mg 2 days. 7/1/22 - start of withdrawals, dizziness, nausea, loss of appetite, shaky. Reinstated 10mg 8/1/22 - 9mg - anxiety, panic attacks, sleep disorders (4-6 hours) 9/1/22 - 8mg - anxiety, panic attacks are gone. Sleep back to normal. Still struggling with appetite. Sporadic abdominal cramps 10/10/22 - 7.2 mg 11/10/22 - 6.6 mg - Tinnitus started after 2 weeks. Nausea is gone and appetite is slowly returning. 12/12/22 - 6 mg 1/11/23- 5.4 mg 1/13/23- 6 mg (up dosed) nausea is back in full force 5/9/23 - changed to home made liquid (dissolves 20mg in 20ml) - 5.9ml supplements: magnesium 300mg, taurine 2g, fish oil, vitamin E, probiotics, bioactive milk peptides, L-theanine Link to comment
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