success ☼ Mogfish: weaning off pristiq

[Altostrata]

Sounds like a question for Dr. Google. Please let us know what you find out.

[mogfish]

Day 17 Pristiq free. The last week has been a little uncomfortable with poor concentration, unusual dreams and mild head shocks. I've also been pretty teary at night time. Its been an emotional few weeks anyway with various issues including the unexpected death of my dear friends Mum who was dear to me also so I would expect to be teary.  I am still able to function ok and am working but not as many shifts as I would normally do. I'm just taking it slowly and trying to reduce any stress as I now that I wonky deal with it well at the moment.

 

Not much info anywhere regarding pristiq and blood clots but the precautions and contraindications mention bleeding problems and I have read of 2 cases of women who developed blood clots whilst taking pristiq and also of a doctor who mentioned that they had seen incidence of blood clots in patients who were on pristiq. I do know that my specialist was quite baffled by the blood clots that I developed over a year ago on a flight home from bali as I had injected myself with blood thinning medication both before and after the flight as a preventative measure. Was probably just bad luck on my behalf but I was on Pristiq at the time so who knows? 

[Altostrata]

Those head zaps (aka brain zaps) are not good. Perhaps a crumb of Pristiq every day?

 

Interesting about the clots. Perhaps your doctor could write up a case report.

[mogfish]

The head zaps are very mild and best way to describe them would be like an intermittent heart beat in my ears. As disappointing as it was to do so, and exactly 1 year and 1 day since I began to wean off Pristiq I have reinstated the tiniest of crumbs this morning.  Thanks for the advice Alto.  

I think deep down I knew I should probably reinstate a tiny crumb again but was just hoping I wouldn't need to. I will take my little crumb for another month or so then try again. 

As disappointed as I am feeling right now, I want to do this right so although my symptoms are mild compared to so many others hopefully reinstating a tiny crumb will alleviate the symptoms and make it more likely I will succeed in the long run 

[mammaP]

Hi Mogfish, don't be disappointed, you have done great and will get there eventually. It's much better to

take that crumb and be able to go about your life comfortable than suffer withdrawal and tough it out,

however mild it might be.  I hope you can find the information you need re the blood clots. 

[Altostrata]

mogfish, others have succeeded with the occasional crumb of Pristiq at the end. Take heart.

[mogfish]

Thank you Alto and mammaP. I have taken a little nibble of an 1/8th of a tablet for the past 2 days and I feel so much better. Will definitely hold here for another month or so and might even reduce to a teeny tiny slither after this hold before jumping off.  The only thing is that the dose will be slightly different from day to day but that hasn't seemed to affect me prior but who would have thought the body/ brain would notice missing a tiny nibble. Clever little brain, I can't get one past you!!! LOL  

[mogfish]

ok  so a bit of an update. For the past 6 weeks I was taking a nibble of pristiq and was doing ok considering everything that was going on at the time. 

 

A week ago I underwent a cervical decompression and fusion of my C5 -C7 (surgery on my neck to remove 2 discs)

I was under anaesthetic for about 2 hours.

I have been experiencing horrible and unrelenting nerve pain for several weeks leading up to the surgery.

3 days prior to the surgery I was put on endone (oxycodone) as the pain was unbearable. Since the surgery the unrelenting nerve pain has all but completely gone and I am so happy about that. I have normal post op pain and some very uncomfortable back spasms which I am going to request to get some valium for a few days and see if that helps. I am taking over the counter pain medication in the morning and afternoon then 2 endone (total 10mg Oxycodone) at night if needed.

 

A week ago I also completely stopped my crumb of pristiq. my reasoning was I have the next month off work and will be feeling miserable anyway post surgery so would have another go at jumping off the pristiq.

 

I haven't really had any of the head shocks which has been good but I have been really teary especially at night and have had a couple of nights where I have felt mildly anxious. Nothing too bad just a feeling of unsettlement and very aware that I would easily snap with the slightest of provocation.

I have told my daughter when I am feeling like this that I am feeling a bit yuck and would like to be left undisturbed as I don't want to get angry at her for no reason.

The last 2 nights especially I haven't been able to sleep till about 3am and spent many an hour lying in bed crying. 

 

I guess I am just wondering if this because I am withdrawing or if maybe it is due to some sort of "post anaesthetic depression" or maybe could it be the endone? An interesting thing I have noticed with the endone is that despite the fact that I have never taken it prior to the last 10 days I seem to have a tolerance for it anyway as I don't get particularly drowsy or that euphoric high that others speak about... In fact, all it seems to do for me is gives me the "munchies"!! lol 

 

Anyway any thoughts/ advice would be appreciated as I am feeling in a bit of a dark place at the moment and have waaay too much time on my hands to think about stuff and have even been wondering if I have done the right thing by weaning off my anti depressant. I know in my heart that it is the right thing to do…well at least I think that it is…as I said, I'm feeling pretty low and would really love some encouragement so that I know I am doing the right thing.

[Altostrata]

The anesthesia and drugs for the surgery probably have confused your system again. This is an aspect of the post-withdrawal hypersensitivity.

 

You might try a tiny crumb of Pristiq here and there, but it's hard to tell what that will do.

 

You might just have to cope and let everything settle down.

 

Good to hear you're doing as well as you are, and your cervical pain has gone.

[ktp]

I like your clever pristiq taper method.  I'm sorry to hear you're in so much pain and unable to work.  I'm willing to bet the isolation caused by your pains can easily increase the time available for rumination er stinkin thinkin, the stuff of which depresion is made.  i say don't go there, stay 'mindful'.  you've got this beat.

 

also thanks for the graphic reminder to go slow.  i was just about to make a big reduction; i will be more conservative, thank you thank you thank you.

        slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

had to read that first sentence ten times to hear it correctly.  all caps SLOW DOWN TAPER AT LOWER DOSES

i woulda copied Lesson learned too but i'm not sure i've learned.  for now i have; sticking with current program. thanks again  be well!

[mogfish]

hi there KTP!

I like the terminology "stinkin thinking!!! I'm sure that you are right in that having so much time on my hands at the moment as well as being in pain has had a negative effect on my overall thinking.

the good news is that today I have really turned the corner. I'm still pristiq free(12 days today) but am feeling a little better. The post surgey pain is now well controlled with only occasional analgesia required and I was given diazepam to take for a couple of days to help with the muscle tension and it has done the trick beautifully. I"m only taking 2 to 4 mg if needed and really only needed to take it for a few days to get my muscles to relax as I was soooo tense. 

As you may have read, I cruised through my pristiq taper relatively easily using my own version of cutting the pills up. I have however found the last little bit to be the hardest and did need to reinstate a crumb of pristiq to take away the mild head shocks that I was experiencing.

I may have been able to tolerate the mild withdrawal symptoms but I am determined to stay off antidepressants for good this time around so I will go as slow as I need to and am open to reinstating the occasional crumb if needs be. I wholeheartedly believe that previous rapid tapers done under medical advice are the reason that I rebounded time and time again back onto antidepressants and I don't want that to happen again. I do get worried when I have a down day that depression is creeping in and maybe the doctors have been right and I need anti depressants to stabilise my mood  and have been questioning myself often these past few months as I have often found myself crying myself to sleep or having negative thoughts.

I need to change my way of thinking though and acknowledge that I have had a tumultuous few months with various things happening including issues with my teenage daughter, excessive pain and surgery amongst other things so all in all I have done pretty well.

 

Good luck to you with your next phase of your taper, I'm glad you have decided NOT to make a big reduction. it is so very tempting when you are doing so well to think that we will be ok with a big drop. Everyone is different though and some people must be ok with big drops and others would need to go much slower than others. Never in a million years did I think that I would need to take more than 12 months to taper from pristiq but now that I am getting close to the end, I am glad that I have done it this way and once again I thank Alto and this site for the invaluable advice available to us.

[mammaP]

Hi Mogfish, I have found the last few beads of effexor the hardest to taper. I reduced from

4 beads to 3 and was 3 months feeling withdrawal and waited to stabilise. Eventually I gave in 

and went back to 4, and felt better very quickly.  Don't be afraid to take that tiny nibble if you feel

the need, it's much better to feel ok than suffer. You have been through a lot  and your body is

still healing from the surgery and all the drugs that go with it so there is no wonder you feel a bit

low sometimes! That doesn't mean it's a return of depression though, just a normal response 

to trauma and I am sure it will pass. 

 

I hope you start to feel better very soon. 

[mogfish]

Thank you mammaP, you always give such good advice and say such encouraging words. Both are very much appreciated

[mogfish]

Ok so time for an update on my progress and also to share with you all some very interesting information about my antidepressant journey.

 

Firstly i will say that I am now just over 7 weeks completely pristiq free!! yay! I am actually doing really really well and although I don't want to tempt fate and say that I am through the worst, I think I am doing really well. I went through a few weeks of feeling teary,  irritable at times and disturbed sleep but all of that seems to have settled down. One thing I have noticed though is that I cry very easily and over the silliest of things. I have been doing this for several months but the last few weeks, although an advert on tv can bring me to tears, I don't really feel sad as such and have a bit of a laugh at myself for doing so.

 

At the time I am writing this I feel a sense of contentment and calm that I have not felt for a very very long time. It is a great way to feel and I have felt this way for several days now if not longer. 

 

For a long time now I have wondered if antidepressants were actually making me feel worse, not better. This is the main reason why I decided to wean off pristiq against my Doctors advice. As many others have experienced, I too was told on many occasions that I would need to be on antidepressants for life……….

 

 

A few weeks ago I requested my medical records from my family doctor and this is what I have discovered.

 

 

August 1997 commenced zoloft 25mg….at some point although unable to find it in my records, this was increased to 50mg.

November 1997 Zoloft ceased as I reported dizziness, flushing and headaches….possibly other complaints that weren't documented. ( doctors are notorious for poor documentation)

 

December 1998 ( 5 months pregnant in a very unstable relationship with babes father) commenced on Aurorix 300mg which was increased to 600mg within the week. Was very emotional and irritable during pregnancy but put it down to hormones.

 

May 1999 ( 5 weeks post partum and admitted to mother and baby unit with post natal depression)…my daughter was tongue tied and it wasn't diagnosed till 4+ weeks and i had been desperately trying to breast feed her unsuccessfully and she was 'starving" and extremely unsettled and I was desperately sleep deprived!!!

? Aurorix increased to 900mg then ceased as I was repeatedly telling medical staff that it wasn't working and was making me worse.

Aurorix ceased cold turkey and Zoloft 50mg commenced (Note I had had previous issues with Zoloft)

 

For what its worth, on more than one occasion it was noted and documented by psychiatrists that my depression did not appear to have a biological cause!

 

October 1999 Ceased Zoloft cold turkey and 4 days later I intentionally overdosed on panadol

 

At some stage between October 1999 and february 2000 I was commenced on Luvox 100mg. This was increased to 200mg late January.   

 

February 4th 2000, I self harmed by cutting my wrists   (this episode was managed by my GP)

 

March 2000 I report to my GP feelings of malaise,sweating,lethargy(documented in medical record) but remain on Luvox

 

May 2000 intentional overdose of multiple prescription drugs ( note 3 months post increased dose of Luvox)

 

5th December 2000 Luvox ceased cold turkey and Efexxor XR 75 mg commenced….unwell for several days but told to keep on efexxor.

17th december 2000 severe reaction to efexxor of vomiting, rapid and irregular heart rate, excessive sweating, extreme restlessness so efexxor ceased cold turkey!!

 

Early April 2001 my treating psychiatrist wanted me on antidepressants but I refused stating " they don't make any difference except make me feel worse"

 

7th April ( 3 days after my daughters second birthday) massive overdose of prescription and non prescription medication including 50 x 25mg phenergan!!! 

(again approx 3 1/2 months post AD cold turkey)

 

April 2001 commenced on cipramil 20mg

 

October 2001 documented complaints to doctors that I was feeling depressed, anxious and "moody"

 

November 2002 increased to 30mg cipramil. documented that I was feeling deeply depressed and told Doctor that I "felt meds do no good". My doctor suggested lithium. I flatly refused.

 

January 2003 still on cipramil . Documented still feeling depressed but I refused increase in dose. I was possibly only on 20mg at this stage and I probably reduced the dose myself without Doctors knowledge. I know that I further reduced the dose at some stage to 10 mg and remained on this for about a year or so.

 

September 2004. diagnosed with blood clotting disorder and had active Deep vein thrombosis in leg.I was also found to have a syndrome that affected my kidneys  Specialist suggested I increase cipramil to 20mg as he thought I seemed depressed ( i was pretty upset to find out I had dodgy kidneys and blood!! lol)

 

From what I can remember I think I stayed on low dose cipramil (10mg) for several years and was relatively stable.

 

late October to early November 2010  I ceased cipramil after reducing the dose over a few months but in hindsight was again too rapid a taper, although at least not cold turkey this time!!

 

November 23rd 2010 documented "is off antidepressants at the moment but has had a tough couple of months but doesn't want to start anything now" I was diagnosed with high grade abnormalities on my pap smear on September 14th 2010  and required surgery immediately to remove the cancerous cells and was also being bullied by my boss at work ( yep I was pretty stressed at the time) 

 

November 30th 2010 reported to GP feeling anxious, snappy and irritable and was therefore commenced on pristiq 50mg. 

April 2011 Documented " doesn't sleep well on pristiq and irritable so she only takes 25mg"

Around March 2012 increased to 50mg pristiq as was under stress at work. shortly after was commenced on blood pressure medication which increased to triple therapy within a few months. My GP never mentioned pristiq could cause high blood pressure. I also complained of teeth grinding and sore jaw and rash in head and upper back which was put down to allergy to shampoo. this rash remained until I reduced dose of pristiq but did return again when I was at the end of my pristiq taper. Coincidence??? hmmm..

 

I myself am a nurse so when I read back over my experience with antidepressants I was disappointed in myself for not seeing the emerging pattern between my state of mind and symptoms and what I was being prescribed or "pulled off" cold turkey. But more than anything, I am deeply disappointed in the medical profession who if taken the time may have seen the pattern and realised that perhaps I was not suicidal and depressed but I was going through horrible withdrawal symptoms and adverse reactions from the medication that I was being prescribed.

Time and time again in correspondence letters and the GP notes, it mentions me telling the Pdoc and GP that the meds aren't helping and are making me feel worse. Although I am deeply regretful for the precious time lost whilst taking these horrible meds I must also be thankful that my self preservation mechanism was hanging in there and I would refuse point blank at times to restart meds or add on other medications such as lithium. I will forever be grateful to myself for this as I cannot begin to imagine the hell I could be in now if I had of given in and followed the doctors advice at all times.

 

I know longer see my GP who has been my GP for over 17 years and was the one to prescribe me antidepressants way back in 1997 and up until the pristiq in 2010 . At my last visit with her whilst in the most difficult part of my withdrawal, I told her that I felt I may have been mismanaged as not enough time was taken to listen to what I was telling her about how the meds were making me feel. I told her that I have very little faith in the medical profession after my experiences and also things I had seen missed in my parents and other family members. She told me it was obvious to her that I was disillusioned and that I should maybe find another doctor. she then told me that I was taking up her time and she had other patients to see!!!! 

 

For years and years I have carried around a deep shame and embarrasment  that I attempted suicide more than once when I was the mother of a beautiful baby girl. My daughters younger years are a blur to me and I regret that deeply. I never truly experienced the joy of being the mother of a baby and toddler. I simply endured each day and couldn't wait for it to be over. Oh how I wish I could have that time back to enjoy the delightful little person that was  and is my daughter.I only hope and pray that I have not caused her irreversible damage. When she went through her own emotional pain a few months back I was terrified that she had inherited my "depression". She has come through those dark days now and she is once again the joyful little soul that sings to herself around the house, laughs often, engages with everyone around her and makes me smile if not laugh out loud every single day.

 

I now have 2 choices. I can continue to mourn for what could have been or should have been. I can regret things I did or didn't do and be angry for how things have turned out and for the time" lost"…..or…… I can be grateful that I have come through the other side  with a beautiful, strong young lady by my side that loves me and that brings me hope and joy every single day…even when she shits me to tears with her "normal" 15 year old girl behaviour.Lol , I can be grateful that for the most part, I have my health and I will heal. I can be grateful that I have parents who have stood by me and "held my hand" throughout the journey. I can be grateful that I have today and thousands and thousands of tomorrows  to look forward to. I am grateful that I found this site to guide me through. I am grateful that I can feel grateful again ))

F*#K YOU PRISTIQ, I WIN!!!!! 

[Altostrata]

So good to hear from you again, mogfish, and thank you for that excellent news.

 

It sounds like you have a long history of iatrogenic problems....

 

Are you still working as a nurse? Is there a way you can educate your colleagues about psych drug withdrawal?

[mogfish]

hi again Alto. yes I still work as a nurse and yes on a small scale I can and do educate colleagues re psych drug withdrawal.

 

It is not uncommon for older patient's to come into hospital with a medical condition and when the drug charts are written up their antidepressants is accidentally omitted or even intentionally ceased.

If I know of a patient who has had a change in personality or acute confusion, the first question I always ask is were they on any medications at home that they are not getting whilst in hospital. Anti depressants and sometimes alcohol and cigarettes are the usual suspects. I always pass this information on to the treating Doctor and depending on the Doctor they will either take note of what I have said and make changes or dismiss my suggestions as unimportant. I have been known to mention to concerned family members that abrupt cessation of antidepressants could be a contributing factor to their loved ones mental state and an upset family member sometimes has more luck than "just a nurse" making the suggestion. 

 

I also teach nurses and training nurses so when we go through the patient meds and why they are on them and possible side effects etc I will certainly drop in a few hard facts about antidepressants.

 

For me I very much believe that the early years of motherhood were deeply affected by the antidepressants I was put on and pulled off with in hindsight very little knowledge of the damage that was doing for me. I don't believe I would have been so self destructive if I wasn't in a constant state of acute withdrawal and adverse reactions to antidepressants. 

 

I have had other medical issues that were caused by genetics and probably just plain bad luck. At the time they caused me stress which is a normal reaction to finding out your body doesn't work as it should but because of my "history" I think the doctors thought it was easier just to put me back on or increase the antidepressants to cushion the stress rather than take the time to councel me through the rough patches and leave off the medications and just accept that I was just upset within context.

 

Even when I presented to emergency years ago with severe side effects to efexxor, I was just brushed aside offered a valium tablet and told that I was just having an anxiety attack. It wasn't until my Mum bailed up the doctor and told him that I was not normally an anxious person and to come and listen to me and what I was trying to tell them that I thought i was reacting to the efexxor that the doctor then begrudgingly checked my symptoms against the MIMS and yes agreed that I was in fact having a severe reaction to the efexxor.

 

I have learnt some valuable life lessons over the years, the main ones being to trust your own instincts and to never judge, generalise or stigmatise. 

[Altostrata]

Yes, adverse effects from psychiatric drugs are very frequently not recognized. Clinicians need a lot more training to prescribe them safely -- and to far fewer people.

[mogfish]

Just thought I would check in to update on my progress. I'm 2 and a half months completely pristiq free and doing well. I have not experienced any obvious withdrawal symptoms for many many weeks now. I still have days where I am cranky and irritable or even a little "blue" but these are very few and far between and more likely due to hormones or a busy long day at work. I no longer get disheartened when I have a day like this though as i remind myself that it is "just a bad day" or even a "wave" and things will probably be better the next day.

My home life is going great and my relationship with my daughter is strong and we are getting along really well which is such a blessing especially as she is at the tender and somewhat difficult age of 15. My Mum asked me the other day if I "was still off the pills" and she commented that I seemed to be doing really well and seemed happy. 

 

I am cautiously optimistic that I have successfully weaned  off antidepressant medication for good but at the same time am just taking each day one at a time and will feel much more confident once I get past the 6 month mark which I have read can be a common time for people to "relapse"

 

Thank you again to everyone for their help and encouragement. I will check in again in a few weeks to update and hopefully I am still doing well.

[Petunia]

Hi Mogfish,

I'm happy to hear you are doing so well and thank you for letting us know, its encouraging to read examples of recovery.  You will soon be able to write your story in our success section.

 

When you get a chance, please would you add the details of your taper to your signature.

 

Petu.

[mogfish]

Thanks Petu,

 

Have added details

[Altostrata]

Hurray! In a bit, please pay it forward with a success story!

[mogfish]

I will for sure Alto! I'm just a little cautious to do it just yet  in case the wheels fall off in the next few months. The 26th of this month will be exactly 3 months pristiq  free and I am counting that as a major milestone. I think I will post in success stories then

 

Thank you thank you thank you

[Altostrata]

You are very welcome, Mogfish.

[Fireball2014]

Just want to congratulate you on your continued success with being Pristiq free!  And also with having the fortitude to stand up to doctors who do not have the ability to listen enough to "get it".  I am a nurse as well who tapered off of Pristiq too quickly recently and can't believe I didn't have more common sense about the process.  But I was hurting as you were, trying to get help from medical professionals who should know better as far as I'm concerned.  Now that I have more of a clue and conscience, I try in my professional practice to educate patients, families, coworkers, etc., about the pitfalls of AD's.

KUDOS TO YOU!

[Altostrata]

Mogfish's success story is here: Mogfish: successful taper directly off Pristiq using cutting up method