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dunerbug: My fluoxetine nightmare


dunerbug

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Hey, here's hoping we get more rest tonight, it's definitely more wave than window for me at the moment. How was your day, did you get to do much? Love. Xxxxx

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I'm really frustrated.

 

I'm also really scared. I'm almost 14 months from my last pill. I've had tons of withdrawal symptoms with the height of it hitting at 5-6 months off the med. I've been in hell since then.

My windows are weak and never symptom free. Even all the physical stuff doesn't compare to the ocd and anxiety. The ocd doesn't seem to want to budge that much. I'm scared this is never ending. It has weaseled it's way into many aspects of my daily life. Before prozac the type of ocd I had was mostly obsessional and very manageable.

 

Now I have compulsions to go along with the fears and obsessions. I'm overwhelmed with where to start dealing with this. I have books, I've done therapy..... Since the thick of withdrawal, it's very difficult implementing things I've learned.

 

I know it sounds like an excuse but I'm so mentally and physically drained sometimes that I take the easy way out. "I'll do exposure therapy when I'm feeling better" Problem is I don't follow through.

 

I need some encouragement.

 

Do you guys think it's the neuro-emotions that's causing me such a road block in this area?

My fear of the ocd seems so real at times.

Think maybe it's the flight or fight response complicating things and making the ocd more intense?

 

Please, if there is anyone else that dealt with ocd during withdrawal ...please share your experience with me. I feel so alone and scared.

 

Also, I feel so bad for my husband and family.

Started Fluoxetine Jan. 2010

Tried to go off of it in Sept. 2010

Weaned too fast and was back on it by Nov. 2010

Didn't work as good the second time around.

Started to wean again in Nov. 2011 and was off for good by April? 2012

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Hi duner, I have been experiencing OCD for a while now in w/d, manifested in cleaning and tidying the house. I can't bear to have anything out of place, constantly tidying, even if I'm completely exhausted! It is definitely a product of w/d and it will go, before this I couldn't have cared less what the house was like and did minimal cleaning. Don't let it get to you, it won't last. Hugs. Xxxxx

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  • Administrator

Windows mean you have periods of reduced symptoms, not being symptom-free. I'd take your "weak" windows as a good sign. They're windows!

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Windows mean you have periods of reduced symptoms, not being symptom-free. I'd take your "weak" windows as a good sign. They're windows!

 

 

That's true. Thanks for the perspective.

Started Fluoxetine Jan. 2010

Tried to go off of it in Sept. 2010

Weaned too fast and was back on it by Nov. 2010

Didn't work as good the second time around.

Started to wean again in Nov. 2011 and was off for good by April? 2012

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  • 4 weeks later...

Hey guys! Just checking in.

 

I'm hanging in there. I've been puttering around the house a little more. Doing yard stuff. The weather is super nice here so I've been riding my bike a little.

 

Still trying not to over do it. If I do, I pay dearly for it. But I'm finding I can do more and more. 

 

I've had some decent windows in May and going in to June so that is good. OCD and anxiety is still a pain in the arse, but when I'm in a window I handle it a little better.

 

I'm officially pmsing so I'm trying to prepare myself for a wave. Started to get a taste of it in the last couple days. It's moment to moment, I'm finding.

 

I'm still having weird brain zaps only when trying to fall asleep. I'm noticing them more lately. Not sure what to make of that other than my brain is still trying to adjust to no prozac. 

 

Part of me feels relieved because I know that my system is still actively repairing and trying to heal. Then another part of me feels sad because here I am at, I guess, about 14 months off prozac and my body is still *having* to fight to repair and heal.  It's a weird conundrum.

 

Outside of all that, my summer is in full swing. All the kids are out on school break now......   :0

Started Fluoxetine Jan. 2010

Tried to go off of it in Sept. 2010

Weaned too fast and was back on it by Nov. 2010

Didn't work as good the second time around.

Started to wean again in Nov. 2011 and was off for good by April? 2012

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So glad to hear things are somewhat better!

1st round Prozac 1989/90, clear depression symptoms. 2nd round Prozac started 1999 when admitted to dr. I was tired. Prozac pooped out, switch to Cymbalta 3/2006. Diagnosed with bipolar disorder due to mania 6/2006--then I was taken abruptly off Cymbalta and didn't know I had SSRI withdrawal. Lots of meds for my intractable "bipolar" symptoms.

Zyprexa started about 9/06, mostly 5mg. Tapered 4/12 through12/29/12

Wellbutrin. XL 300 mg started 1/07, tapered 1/18/13 through 7/8/13

Oxazepam mostly continuously since 6/06, 30mg since 12/12, tapered 1.17.14 through 8.26.15

11/06 Lithium 600mg twice daily, 2.2.14 400mg TID DIY liquid, 2.12.14 1150mg, 3.2.14 1100mg, 3.18.14 1075mg, 4/14 updose to 1100mg, 6.1.14 900 mg capsules 7.8.14 810mg, 8.17.14 725mg, 8.24.24 700mg...10.22.14 487.5mg, 3.9.15 475mg, 4.1.15 462.5mg 4.21.15 450mg 8.11.15 375mg, 11.28.15 362.5mg, back to 375mg four days later, 3.4.16 updose to 475 (too much going on to risk trouble)

9/4/13 Toprol-XL 25mg daily for sudden hypertension, tapered 11.12.13 through 5.3.14, last 10 days or so switched to atenolol

7.4.14 Started Walsh Protocol

56 years old

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My husband told me something last night after an argument that started over my ocd.

 

I told him in so many words that I can feel him wearing thin having to deal with me and my withdrawal problems.

 

He told me it is difficult for him because he is with someone who is completely self absorbed. It was like a slap in the face.....because it's true.

 

:(

Started Fluoxetine Jan. 2010

Tried to go off of it in Sept. 2010

Weaned too fast and was back on it by Nov. 2010

Didn't work as good the second time around.

Started to wean again in Nov. 2011 and was off for good by April? 2012

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Dear Dunerbug....we discuss things like that all the time. Have you asked him what specific things make him feel most loved and cared for? At our house it is true....I have a therapist acquaintance who started an an antipsychotic for Bipolar II symptoms starting at the end of her first pregnancy (she has a brother with long-time Bipolar I symptoms). She is finished with pregnancies now and has weaned down to 1/4 tablet. But she's not going off because she wants to be able to use it if needed. She told me, "people with active mental illness just aren't able to love well." I totally see (and have lived) her point, but I think there's more we can do to heal without drugs. Do you have a "care plan" for treating yourself?

 

For what I mean, here's some of my plan:

 

Walk 30 minutes

Spend eight hours in bed at night if possible, keep alarm on for 5 a.m. ( I don't always get up right away)

Gardening barefoot (sunlight, nature, grounding)

Just started GAPS diet, but always try to be gluten- free

Reading, and eventually apply The Mind and the Brain....lots in there about OCD, but it is an overly-detailed book

10 min of very-beginner meditation

 

I am beginning to think that although it takes time to recover, it takes a lot of effort too.

 

Really, really wishing you and your family the best. One of your posts mentioned faith. You are welcome to pm me if you want to discuss that more.

1st round Prozac 1989/90, clear depression symptoms. 2nd round Prozac started 1999 when admitted to dr. I was tired. Prozac pooped out, switch to Cymbalta 3/2006. Diagnosed with bipolar disorder due to mania 6/2006--then I was taken abruptly off Cymbalta and didn't know I had SSRI withdrawal. Lots of meds for my intractable "bipolar" symptoms.

Zyprexa started about 9/06, mostly 5mg. Tapered 4/12 through12/29/12

Wellbutrin. XL 300 mg started 1/07, tapered 1/18/13 through 7/8/13

Oxazepam mostly continuously since 6/06, 30mg since 12/12, tapered 1.17.14 through 8.26.15

11/06 Lithium 600mg twice daily, 2.2.14 400mg TID DIY liquid, 2.12.14 1150mg, 3.2.14 1100mg, 3.18.14 1075mg, 4/14 updose to 1100mg, 6.1.14 900 mg capsules 7.8.14 810mg, 8.17.14 725mg, 8.24.24 700mg...10.22.14 487.5mg, 3.9.15 475mg, 4.1.15 462.5mg 4.21.15 450mg 8.11.15 375mg, 11.28.15 362.5mg, back to 375mg four days later, 3.4.16 updose to 475 (too much going on to risk trouble)

9/4/13 Toprol-XL 25mg daily for sudden hypertension, tapered 11.12.13 through 5.3.14, last 10 days or so switched to atenolol

7.4.14 Started Walsh Protocol

56 years old

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I am doing a lot more now than say 3-4 months ago. 

 

I'm out in the yard a lot.

 

Spending more time with the family. (before, I would spend almost all day in my room)

 

Riding my bike.

 

The last couple days I've been drawing. I like doing abstract art. 

 

Started attending church. Have gone a couple times. Get distracted by the dumbest things while I'm there. Hearts not totally into, but I figure that should improve later on if I try.

 

I've improved.

Started Fluoxetine Jan. 2010

Tried to go off of it in Sept. 2010

Weaned too fast and was back on it by Nov. 2010

Didn't work as good the second time around.

Started to wean again in Nov. 2011 and was off for good by April? 2012

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My problems are at the forefront of my mind since the withdrawal got bad. There are times when everything revolves around it. And I've really begun to look at myself as a sickly person. It's crippling sometimes and can consume my mind. 

 

So I get why he said that....I don't like it, but I get it. I wasn't always this self absorbed.

 

I can see it even when reading my posts on this thread.

Started Fluoxetine Jan. 2010

Tried to go off of it in Sept. 2010

Weaned too fast and was back on it by Nov. 2010

Didn't work as good the second time around.

Started to wean again in Nov. 2011 and was off for good by April? 2012

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dunerbug, so thrilled you've been feeling better, I'm so happy for you! I was wondering how you'd been doing. Of course it's easy to be self absorbed when you still have symptoms and are not one hundred per cent, distraction is the key. Sending lots of healing love. Xxxxxxxx

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I am like that too. But wonderful that you are getting better! Keep up the good work!

1st round Prozac 1989/90, clear depression symptoms. 2nd round Prozac started 1999 when admitted to dr. I was tired. Prozac pooped out, switch to Cymbalta 3/2006. Diagnosed with bipolar disorder due to mania 6/2006--then I was taken abruptly off Cymbalta and didn't know I had SSRI withdrawal. Lots of meds for my intractable "bipolar" symptoms.

Zyprexa started about 9/06, mostly 5mg. Tapered 4/12 through12/29/12

Wellbutrin. XL 300 mg started 1/07, tapered 1/18/13 through 7/8/13

Oxazepam mostly continuously since 6/06, 30mg since 12/12, tapered 1.17.14 through 8.26.15

11/06 Lithium 600mg twice daily, 2.2.14 400mg TID DIY liquid, 2.12.14 1150mg, 3.2.14 1100mg, 3.18.14 1075mg, 4/14 updose to 1100mg, 6.1.14 900 mg capsules 7.8.14 810mg, 8.17.14 725mg, 8.24.24 700mg...10.22.14 487.5mg, 3.9.15 475mg, 4.1.15 462.5mg 4.21.15 450mg 8.11.15 375mg, 11.28.15 362.5mg, back to 375mg four days later, 3.4.16 updose to 475 (too much going on to risk trouble)

9/4/13 Toprol-XL 25mg daily for sudden hypertension, tapered 11.12.13 through 5.3.14, last 10 days or so switched to atenolol

7.4.14 Started Walsh Protocol

56 years old

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Thank you!

Started Fluoxetine Jan. 2010

Tried to go off of it in Sept. 2010

Weaned too fast and was back on it by Nov. 2010

Didn't work as good the second time around.

Started to wean again in Nov. 2011 and was off for good by April? 2012

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  • 2 weeks later...

In the thick of a pretty bad wave. Started several days ago. (I think 3?)

 

Achy, kind of like I'm feverish.

 

Dull headache.

 

Very emotional. depressed.

 

Anxiety and ocd through the roof.

 

Last night I wasn't able to get to sleep til close to 4 am. But I think it was more because I fell asleep at 9 something and couldn't get back to sleep when my husband came to bed.

 

What's interesting, is this wave came at the tail end of my period. Usually I feel bad before. 

 

I have also been having seasonal allergies bad in the last couple weeks. Maybe could have brought on the wave?

 

I don't know.... Whatever the reason, I haven't felt this bad in a while and it pretty devastating. I could really use some support. 

 

This last year and a half has really taken a toll. I feel as though I've aged ten years. I'm so tired......

Started Fluoxetine Jan. 2010

Tried to go off of it in Sept. 2010

Weaned too fast and was back on it by Nov. 2010

Didn't work as good the second time around.

Started to wean again in Nov. 2011 and was off for good by April? 2012

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duner, so sorry you are in a wave like that. I feel really exhausted aswell at the moment so you're not alone! Just take it for what it is, try not to get upset, it will go away just like it came upon you. Thinking of you, I know you will feel better soon. Love and hugs. Xxxxxxx

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  • Moderator Emeritus

One of the side effects of SSRIs and withdrawal is swelling of the mucous membranes.  I also have seasonal allergies and I felt like I had the world's worst case of flu when I was tapering off of Lexapro (far too fast, BTW) in the fall of 2011.  At the time I thought I had horrendous hay fever, but a lot of it was withdrawal. I spent a lot of time in bed being miserable that fall.

 

Strangely, I've not had any problems with seasonal allergies since then.

Psychotropic drug history: Pristiq 50 mg. (mid-September 2010 through February 2011), Remeron (mid-September 2010 through January 2011), Lexapro 10 mg. (mid-February 2011 through mid-December 2011), Lorazepam (Ativan) 1 mg. as needed mid-September 2010 through early March 2012

"Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity." -Hanlon's Razor


Introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1588-introducing-jemima/

 

Success Story: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/6263-success-jemima-survives-lexapro-and-dr-dickhead-too/

Please note that I am not a medical professional and my advice is based on personal experience, reading, and anecdotal information posted by other sufferers.

 

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One of the side effects of SSRIs and withdrawal is swelling of the mucous membranes.  I also have seasonal allergies and I felt like I had the world's worst case of flu when I was tapering off of Lexapro (far too fast, BTW) in the fall of 2011.  At the time I thought I had horrendous hay fever, but a lot of it was withdrawal. I spent a lot of time in bed being miserable that fall.

 

Strangely, I've not had any problems with seasonal allergies since then.

 

That's interesting about the mucus membranes. I didn't know that. 

 

I have been doing A LOT of yard work lately. I have toned it way down since feeling bad. 

 

It sucks too, because I can't take a darn thing to help.

Started Fluoxetine Jan. 2010

Tried to go off of it in Sept. 2010

Weaned too fast and was back on it by Nov. 2010

Didn't work as good the second time around.

Started to wean again in Nov. 2011 and was off for good by April? 2012

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  • 2 weeks later...

Well s**t!

 

Looks like I am having a bad reaction to fish oil. 

 

So I guess now I can't fricken take anything!!! (with the exception on the homeopathic remedy)

Started Fluoxetine Jan. 2010

Tried to go off of it in Sept. 2010

Weaned too fast and was back on it by Nov. 2010

Didn't work as good the second time around.

Started to wean again in Nov. 2011 and was off for good by April? 2012

Link to comment

This sucks...It's times like this that I wish there were actually a magic pill that could make me all better. But I guess that's how I got into this mess.

Started Fluoxetine Jan. 2010

Tried to go off of it in Sept. 2010

Weaned too fast and was back on it by Nov. 2010

Didn't work as good the second time around.

Started to wean again in Nov. 2011 and was off for good by April? 2012

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  • Moderator Emeritus

This sucks...It's times like this that I wish there were actually a magic pill that could make me all better. But I guess that's how I got into this mess.

 

Wise words, Dunerbug!

Psychotropic drug history: Pristiq 50 mg. (mid-September 2010 through February 2011), Remeron (mid-September 2010 through January 2011), Lexapro 10 mg. (mid-February 2011 through mid-December 2011), Lorazepam (Ativan) 1 mg. as needed mid-September 2010 through early March 2012

"Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity." -Hanlon's Razor


Introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1588-introducing-jemima/

 

Success Story: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/6263-success-jemima-survives-lexapro-and-dr-dickhead-too/

Please note that I am not a medical professional and my advice is based on personal experience, reading, and anecdotal information posted by other sufferers.

 

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Seems like if I stop something for any length of time lately and try to start it up again, I am more sensitive to it. 

I don't remember having trouble with liquid fish oil when i was on it last. I may try it again, but I'm scared. I took two tablespoons. Maybe I'll try one next time.

 

On a positive note. I took the kids to the river today. I also brought my furry child (Sam) and threw his ball into the water for him to catch. He and the kids had a blast. 

 

It was awesome putting my feet in the water and feeling the sand in my toes. I had several moments where felt a sort of peace. Those moments help me hold on to hope. 

 

It got up to, I think, 108 degrees today!

Started Fluoxetine Jan. 2010

Tried to go off of it in Sept. 2010

Weaned too fast and was back on it by Nov. 2010

Didn't work as good the second time around.

Started to wean again in Nov. 2011 and was off for good by April? 2012

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  • Administrator

Always good to be gradual when re-introducing a supplement.

 

Good to hear of your lovely window at the river!

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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  • 1 month later...

In a hellish wave. 

 

I didn't want to post because It will be really negative.

 

I'm doing it because I need to though, so bear with me. 

 

Things have been pretty up and down. Unfortunately, the one thing that stands tough is the ocd.

 

I'm on my cycle, so I understand everything is compounded. I'm in a bad place with depression. I cried several times yesterday.

I find myself bitter with God. My husband mentioned church this weekend and I was sort of relieved when he changed his mind. I'm angry and brokenhearted by all the desperate prayers I've sent up there that I feel are unanswered. 

I do not consider myself suicidal but the thoughts are there when I feel awful. I know they are a common product of the depression. Still, it is very disheartening to be able to say that I can understand why someone would go there.

 

I open up to my husband a lot and I can see the helplessness on his face. Though my tears, yesterday, I asked, "What did I do to deserve this" I want to cry just typing it out. 

 

17 months since my last pill.

Started Fluoxetine Jan. 2010

Tried to go off of it in Sept. 2010

Weaned too fast and was back on it by Nov. 2010

Didn't work as good the second time around.

Started to wean again in Nov. 2011 and was off for good by April? 2012

Link to comment
  • Administrator

Think of it as temporary, caused by your hormonal cycle. Hang in there.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

Link to comment
  • 1 month later...

It was recommended to me to get one. 

 

There were several months where I was blacking out, pretty much every time I stood up. It has improved greatly but does still happen every now and again. The cardiologist I saw found no issues with my heart and said that I should see a neurologist. He said that the neurologist would want me to be tilt table tested before seeing him.

 

It will be two years this coming April, since stopping prozac and my quality of life is very poor. Still having a lot of weird symptoms and I'm worried that there is something more wrong.

 

None of the other professionals I've seen seem to understand or take the time to really listen. I'm hoping a neurologist will. Does anyone have experience seeing one?

 

I have a husband and three kids that I have to care for. I can barely provide basic needs now so my husband has had to take over. I cannot keep living this way. The sadness I feel when I look at how bad things are is just unbearable sometimes.

 

At this point, I need more answers. 

 

Any input?

Started Fluoxetine Jan. 2010

Tried to go off of it in Sept. 2010

Weaned too fast and was back on it by Nov. 2010

Didn't work as good the second time around.

Started to wean again in Nov. 2011 and was off for good by April? 2012

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Dunerbug, I've read your posts for so long...what a journey you've been on!

 

About the passing out...my sister was diagnosed by tilt table test with neurocardiogenic syncope, it was explained as the nervous system not regulating the blood pressure properly with position changes. But it is more complicated than just orthostatic hypotension. The natural treatment is more salt, especially sea (Himalayan is supposed to be the best) salt, about a tsp. in water. The dr. Said it will taste good if it is what your body needs. The medical treatment she uses is spironolactone, which is, of all things, an anti hypertensive.

 

It seems my family has a genetic tendency towards sleep apnea, which leads to overproduction of adrenal hormones. I think that is her real problem, causing autonomic instability. WD, through a different mechanism, can cause the same thing. Also, through yet a different mechanism, chronic fatigue syndrome also does this. An interesting ebook on that is called Unravelling CFS...it has a lot of practical advice. How is that for over-connecting the dots?

 

Also, I read a book called The Brain and the Mind that had some interesting ideas about OCD happening when two parts of the brain lock up together saying error, error, error, everything is not okay. I can really see how WD would aggregate that. The book had some fascinating concepts, but it was written in excruciating detail.

 

I wonder if acupuncture and CBT might help, especially since I'm sure you have unlimited funds.

 

I'm wishing you the best!

1st round Prozac 1989/90, clear depression symptoms. 2nd round Prozac started 1999 when admitted to dr. I was tired. Prozac pooped out, switch to Cymbalta 3/2006. Diagnosed with bipolar disorder due to mania 6/2006--then I was taken abruptly off Cymbalta and didn't know I had SSRI withdrawal. Lots of meds for my intractable "bipolar" symptoms.

Zyprexa started about 9/06, mostly 5mg. Tapered 4/12 through12/29/12

Wellbutrin. XL 300 mg started 1/07, tapered 1/18/13 through 7/8/13

Oxazepam mostly continuously since 6/06, 30mg since 12/12, tapered 1.17.14 through 8.26.15

11/06 Lithium 600mg twice daily, 2.2.14 400mg TID DIY liquid, 2.12.14 1150mg, 3.2.14 1100mg, 3.18.14 1075mg, 4/14 updose to 1100mg, 6.1.14 900 mg capsules 7.8.14 810mg, 8.17.14 725mg, 8.24.24 700mg...10.22.14 487.5mg, 3.9.15 475mg, 4.1.15 462.5mg 4.21.15 450mg 8.11.15 375mg, 11.28.15 362.5mg, back to 375mg four days later, 3.4.16 updose to 475 (too much going on to risk trouble)

9/4/13 Toprol-XL 25mg daily for sudden hypertension, tapered 11.12.13 through 5.3.14, last 10 days or so switched to atenolol

7.4.14 Started Walsh Protocol

56 years old

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Meim-  Thanks for the response and the book recommendation!

 

I really like acupuncture and want to go back. I had to stop due to finances. But I found another lady out here who does it for, I think, $35 a session. The other guy was $75, which I now know is kinda high.

 

I really want to try cranial sacral therapy.

 

I was seeing someone for my OCD before moving out here. I tend to have trouble doing cbt on my own. I need to work harder at it for sure.

Started Fluoxetine Jan. 2010

Tried to go off of it in Sept. 2010

Weaned too fast and was back on it by Nov. 2010

Didn't work as good the second time around.

Started to wean again in Nov. 2011 and was off for good by April? 2012

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  • 5 weeks later...

Looking back on this thread I had a pretty decent latter half of may, june and july.

 

I've gone way down hill since then. It's hard to find any rhyme or reason for it.

 

It's good to have a, sort of journal, for it though.

Started Fluoxetine Jan. 2010

Tried to go off of it in Sept. 2010

Weaned too fast and was back on it by Nov. 2010

Didn't work as good the second time around.

Started to wean again in Nov. 2011 and was off for good by April? 2012

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

That's why I'm always telling people to journal...in withdrawal our minds can mess with us and we can lose track of the pattern of good times and bad times, and just think it's all been bad and it never gets better and it's hopeless. I'm glad you've had the chance to see that it can be better.

 

Have you ever tried using one of those therapy lamps they use for seasonal depression? This time of year can be hard, with our bodies and minds thinking it's time to hibernate but our society and our lives insisting we be as "up" and busy as ever.

 

It's also harder to get out for those walks when the weather's not good. And then when you're feeling terrible it's so hard to do the things you know are good for you.

 

Just try to tweak your life as much as you can, to do the little things, like exercise and light exposure, and maybe the acupuncture that you've found helpful. Sometimes all I can do is just one little thing a day, or even just every few days, but I try to forgive myself and yet sort of push myself to do those little things. Those little things can add up.

 

Good luck. My heart goes out to you.

Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. 

Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010.  Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea.

 

Feb 15 2010:  300 mg Neurontin  200 Lamictal   10 Celexa      0.65 Xanax   and 5 mg Ambien 

Feb 10 2014:   62 Lamictal    1.1 Celexa         0.135 Xanax    1.8 Valium

Feb 10 2015:   50 Lamictal      0.875 Celexa    0.11 Xanax      1.5 Valium

Feb 15 2016:   47.5 Lamictal   0.75 Celexa      0.0875 Xanax    1.42 Valium    

2/12/20             12                       0.045               0.007                   1 

May 2021            7                       0.01                  0.0037                1

Feb 2022            6                      0!!!                     0.00167               0.98                2.5 mg Ambien

Oct 2022       4.5 mg Lamictal    (off Celexa, off Xanax)   0.95 Valium    Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet 

 

I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi Dunerbug, sorry you are still feeling bad. It is good to look back and see that we do have some windows

now and again. It's easy to forget them when the waves come because they are so powerful. I'm glad I have

this forum and my own thread that I can look back on and see that there have been times when I felt good.

It's good to go back when I feel bad too because I can see that it has been much much worse! 

 

I'm with Rhi on the light therapy, I've used a light box for years and don't think I would get through a winter

without it! I would end up in hospital every winter until I got the light box, it really does make a tremendous

difference to me. I hope you feel better very soon. 

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

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Rhi and MammaP-

 

I have a light box in the garage. I used it a lot before I moved because I lived in the pacific nw.

 

Didn't even occur to me to use it out here because there is more sunshine. When I'm feeling bad I don't go out a lot though so ....maybe I should dust the ol happy light off!

Started Fluoxetine Jan. 2010

Tried to go off of it in Sept. 2010

Weaned too fast and was back on it by Nov. 2010

Didn't work as good the second time around.

Started to wean again in Nov. 2011 and was off for good by April? 2012

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Ok, this is mostly for journaling purposes but I've compiled a list of symptoms to share with the neurologist. Some of the symptoms have changed, but I wanted to put down everything I've experienced going through this process.

 

Bladder control issues/frequent urination

dizziness, feeling faint, blacking out upon standing

cognetive impairment, mermory loss, confusion, difficulty concentrating

Multiple substance sensitivities

gas, bloating (sometimes) slight swelling.

fatigue

Dramatic changes in personality

Lack of thirst

Depression, anxiety, OCD

Severe PMS, Heavy period

Hypothyroid symptoms, hair loss/thinning, cold feet, shivers

Tinnitus

Weird flash type sound/feeling in my head/behind my eyes when trying to fall asleep (difficult to describe)

Achy neck and upper back

Dull headaches

Low pulse? (past)

Hypoglycemia symptoms

 

I'm also bringing him all my lab tests.

Started Fluoxetine Jan. 2010

Tried to go off of it in Sept. 2010

Weaned too fast and was back on it by Nov. 2010

Didn't work as good the second time around.

Started to wean again in Nov. 2011 and was off for good by April? 2012

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Many of the symptoms you list, sound like hypothyroid! You can be within the normal range and still be hypo. You can read more about it at www.stopthethyroidmadness.com or buy the book on amazon. ( Stop The Thyroid Madness)

 

http://www.facebook.com/notes/thyroid-sexy/hypothyroid-symptoms/375387382480223

I am on 2.0 mg abilify for 2 yrs now.  I tired to taper every month 2.0....1.5....1.0....0.5....off.  I was fine until I jumped off at the end.  I will need to slow the taper down after 0.5.  Maybe try 0.5, 0.4, 0.3, 0.2, 0.1, 0.05, 0.025...off.

 

8/2/17. Abilify  2.0 mg

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Wow thanks! That was very informative.

 

I suspect this as well.

I've had three different thyroid tests done and they were in the normal range so the providers I saw would not give me thyroid meds. It's very frustrating.

My tests did show that I was on the high end of normal though.

 

I'm going to request another detailed thyroid test with this new doc because of all the continued problems.

Started Fluoxetine Jan. 2010

Tried to go off of it in Sept. 2010

Weaned too fast and was back on it by Nov. 2010

Didn't work as good the second time around.

Started to wean again in Nov. 2011 and was off for good by April? 2012

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Your Free T3 and Free T4 should both be in the upper part of their ranges. The middle is not good enough. I had to go to 6 doctors before I found one who would treat me because my values were so called "normal".

 

My doctor!!

http://charlesbrummer.squarespace.com/blog/2010/10/1/hypothyroidism-with-normal-blood-tests.html

I am on 2.0 mg abilify for 2 yrs now.  I tired to taper every month 2.0....1.5....1.0....0.5....off.  I was fine until I jumped off at the end.  I will need to slow the taper down after 0.5.  Maybe try 0.5, 0.4, 0.3, 0.2, 0.1, 0.05, 0.025...off.

 

8/2/17. Abilify  2.0 mg

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