johnson: 5htp and PSSD?

[johnson]

Hi,

 

A quick update, every day the main symptoms I go back and forth with are frequent urination/genital arousal or severe muscle tension in my neck shoulders followed by a headache. And of course PSSD all the time.

 

Aug 27, 2014 I will be 21 months off since I took my last pill of 5htp. It's very exhausting and tiring living like this day to day I am so tired. The severe muscle tension, neck shoulders problems started about 9 months ago. I went to the doctor and he couldn't find anything wrong.

 

All in all my health hasn't been really good since April 2012 when I was still on 5htp and it's around the time my health started to deteriorate. I don't know how much longer this will go on and how long I can last. I pray all the time that I will heal and recover mentally and physically. I try my best to not think about this. Sometimes I succeed but other times when the symptoms are really bad it's hard to think about anything else. I go to the gym about twice a week if possible and hang out with friends when my symptoms are somewhat bearable.

 

I feel like this is a never ending nightmare and hell that doesn't go away. I hope to wake up one day and have this nightmare finally over, that I finally wake up from this extremely bad dream and everything will be OK and back to MY normal.

I just want to live my life in peace now and get on with it! Is that too much to ask?

 

I am holding on but many days I'm barely hanging in there.

Thanks for reading and dropping by.

[Altostrata]

The symptoms go back and forth? Perhaps you should keep notes about them. They may be decreasing in frequency and intensity -- as they generally do.

[johnson]

Hey Guys,

 

Just an update. I've been off 5htp for 25 months now. I have gotten sick twice in December and currently fighting through the flu.

Every day I experience muscle tension and tension headaches. I am struggling with it daily. I still have issues with PSSD.

I don't know how long all these problems are going to last. And how much more I can take and how much fight I have left in me.

It's taken it's toll. I know everyone on this website is struggling and fighting through their own battles.

 

Life is passing me by, I hope I can catch up when all is said and done.

 

I realize that the reason I am in this mess to begin with, is because I took my health for granted long before any of this. I have no one to blame for that but myself.

 

The only thing I hope for now is to be healthy again.

 

An ex girlfriend from a long time ago used to always say "when it rains it pours" and "this too shall pass"

I want this to pass for good and never come back so I can have my life back again.

[Altostrata]

Hello, johnson.

 

Very sorry to hear you're still having problems. You might want to increase the magnesium, 50mg is quite a low dose. Also, fish oil can help healing in general, see

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/36-king-of-supplements-omega-3-fatty-acids-fish-oil/
http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1300-magnesium-natures-calcium-channel-blocker/

 

Are you noticing your headaches occur after any particular food or drink?
 

[johnson]

Thanks Alto. I'm doing a bit better now. Guess I just needed to vent my life's frustrations. Thanks for responding.

 

Sometimes I get headaches waking up first thing in the morning, or after a long day at work. I haven't pin pointed it to any particular food or drink.

Sometimes after I come home from the gym, I notice some tension/headache coming on as well. The tension is always in my shoulders and neck.

 

I'm just going to try my best to take it a day at a time and hopefully I'll get past all this once and for all.

 

thanks as always.

[johnson]

I found this from wiki regarding tension headaches, serotonin and the role of nitric oxide. Under the cause section

 

http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tension_headache

[cymbaltawithdrawal5600]

That was an interesting article on headache but disheartening that they recommend an AD for relief.

 

I started getting headaches, accompanied by a vague nausea and tension in my shoulders too. I had been doing some bead work and noticed that I could not see very well, things for my close work were blurry. I went to my eye doc's place and the tech put new nose pieces on and adjusted my frames and asked me when was the last time I had my eyes checked. He said my glasses lenses were very scratched. I told him the glasses were just hardly 1 year old and I did not notice the scratches. He said they are hard to see but my eye can see them because the light hits them and causes flashes. I don't know if this is optometric nonsense to get me to buy new ones but the headaches have ceased for now just from getting them adjusted.

 

The type of frames that are "in" now are a squatty type. not tall up and downwise. There has to be a minimum height for them if you have progressive bifocals like I do. If they are too squat, the magnified area is not tall enough to hit your eye right. Mine are at the bare minimum and there is a very narrow sweet spot. They get out of adjustment easily and then I guess I must be getting eye strain which is mentioned in the wiki article. The optometrists aren't supposed to let you get ones that are too squatty but sometimes they goof up. The initial pair was a goof. I also can't wear polycarbonate lenses, the rainbow colored 'oil slicks' in them give me nausea.

 

Headaches are difficult to live with but you don't say if you are getting them daily. I hope not. I often think about you and wonder how you are doing. I missed checking in on you the last time I saw you posted. Sorry to hear that all is not good (I just looked and I see you are getting the headaches daily. Get your eyes checked?)

 

2 years is not such a long time yet but I know it seems so. I am just coming out from under protracted wd that hit 1 yr after being off meds, it lasted a year so I am starting on year 3. I never expected to feel better so soon. I don't know what to say except that I hope it happens for you too and soon.

[johnson]

Hi CW5600,

 

It's really nice to hear from you and thanks for taking the time to drop by.

 

I get the tension and headaches daily. However the headaches aren't always that bad. There are times when I can get on with my daily routine. I don't have to take advil or anything. Just magnesium and tiger balm helps me get through with out any over the counter drugs. I usually get a really bad headache about twice a month. More recently it's been getting worse and worse. It's to the point where I can barely function and really can't do much of anything.

 

I've been to two different doctors, had x-rays. Been to two physiotherapists, massage, accu and chiropractor. Changed my mattress pillows, tried to change my posture. Tried heating pads, different stretches for neck and shoulders. Have a pretty good diet with no drugs, smoking or alcohol of course. Go the gym about twice a week, usually more when I'm feeling ok. Tried drinking tons of water daily.

I also had my eyes checked a few months ago. I was told my vision is fine.

The only thing that was suggested is I get sunglasses to protect my eyes from UV. They are prescription. But that's it.

 

Thank you for being so caring. And for taking the time to think about me. It really means a lot.

 

It's amazing to hear that on year 3 you are feeling better. I really hope you continue to recover and get better.

 

thanks CW5600

[cymbaltawithdrawal5600]

Johnson,

 

Had you thought about Alto's recommendation for taking more magnesium?

 

I was reading about it again today. I'll post you some links tomorrow, if I forget you remind me, ok? I have to get off this computer, my left eye is hurting like a sty is starting. When I woke up this morning it felt like it had not shut completely in my sleep and my covers irritated it. I'll come back to this tomorrow.

[johnson]

Hi CW5600,

 

I have been feeling a bit better this week.

I did think about Alto's recommendation. I ended up buying 250mg of magnesium. I took it for a little while but haven't taken it this past week.

 

Don't worry about posting the links. But I appreciate your help.

 

I think I wrote this earlier, at this point I just want a second chance at life. If I can recover from PSSD fully, and the tension/headaches go away then it will be possible. That's all that I want. Is a second chance.

 

Thanks Alto, CW5600 for your replies and much needed caring and support.

[Altostrata]

johnson, how are you doing now?

[johnson]

Hi Alto,

 

Thanks for dropping me a line!

 

The past few days I have been doing a bit better. My PSSD had slightly improved only to have the symptoms return as usual. My neck and headaches also improved a bit as well.

But it could be just a quick window. But it's only been a few days. Nothing to get too excited about. I've done that before where I got a bit too excited because I was feeling better and then my symptoms were really bad the next day.

 

I just want to thank you and your staff for all the volunteer work you do for everyone here!

 

I really just focus on taking things one day at a time. Or one morning at a time, one hour at a time etc. Depending on how bad things get.

I still can't believe how long this has been going on though.....

[cymbaltawithdrawal5600]

But a quick window is a sign of progress, if you ask me. That fact that you were able to notice a change is huge!

 

I am glad you came back and gave us an update. Yes, this really does take far too long.

 

Did you ever submit your story (with special emphasis on using 5HTP) to rxisk?

[Altostrata]

You're welcome, johnson. You will get through this to the other side.

[johnson]

But a quick window is a sign of progress, if you ask me. That fact that you were able to notice a change is huge!

 

I am glad you came back and gave us an update. Yes, this really does take far too long.

 

Did you ever submit your story (with special emphasis on using 5HTP) to rxisk?

 

Hey CW5600 how have you been doing? I never submitted my story. Maybe I will once this is all over.

[johnson]

You're welcome, johnson. You will get through this to the other side.

 

I think I'm starting to believe I can. Thanks for your continued support.

[Nathalou]

Hi Johnson, just read thorugh your thread. I wanted to ask you if you still have the zaps, dizziness, trmors, eye twithcing, nausea etc? Or did these symptoms subside?

 

It's funny, the first time I tried to get off Zoloft I developed severe urinairy frequency (I am female) and horrendous bladder pain. I wet through all kinds of test, cystoscopies and even an MRI scan of my urinary tract. I am not kidding when I say I went to the loo roughly between 25-30 x/day. It improved once I got on the SSRI but I still get it sometimes (I'm off SSRIs now) but nowadays it last for a few hours only or a day every now a then but it's totally managable and doesn't bother me.

 

How much would you say you have recovered from all your symptoms? There really seems to be no rhyme or reason in WD, and 5htp is not as 'natural" as we are made to believe... sigh..

[cymbaltawithdrawal5600]

I am so glad to see you posting on the site, your reply to FBS was spot on. It does, however, take a great deal of time to gain the clear head needed to cut through the bs in our thinking. Lots of time grinding away at the mundane (but sometimes very frightening yand incomprehensibile) tasks of recovery we all face at one time or another as we keep at it.

[Altostrata]

Please let us be clearheaded and also express ourselves politely and compassionately.

[johnson]

Hey Everyone,

 

It's been a while since I've given an update. I've been off 5htp for 2 years and 8 months now. I'm still struggling with PSSD, headaches and PGAD daily.

 

While my PSSD hasn't really improved, my headaches/tension are now at a point where it doesn't interfere with my life all the time. I do get really bad headaches a few times a month and usually just try and sleep it off when I do get them. My PGAD, though it's still a daily problem is not interfering with my life like it used to, I still feel it daily but it's not as uncomfortable as it had been in the past. I still have to deal with the feeling of frequent urination also.

 

My PSSD on the other hand hasn't really gotten better. I'm not sure what to think of this except that it's on my mind all the time. I turned 33 years old last month.

I'm at a point now, especially this past week where i've been praying to God everyday to completely heal me right now, so I can get on with my life. I want to get past this. I want a second chance at life.

I just want this to be over right now. I want to finally start the next chapter in my life. I'm so tired of all this.

 

I would like to thank Alto, CW5600 and the other admins for your support. I also want to thank Pancho, Kaza and Jac84 for your support also. It's helped me through especially when I feel alone in my recovery. Thanks. I haven't seen any updates from FBS, I hope she's ok.

 

CW5600, I re-read my thread today. I really appreciate what you wrote about me finding a woman who is understanding, something about a woman not crossing me off their list because of my problem. It pretty much brought tears to my eyes. It's hard to admit as a man when you cry. But I did. I think I'm getting to that point that even with my current problems I feel like I'm kind of more ready to start looking for someone. I hope if i do meet someone she will accept me and also hope that I'm far enough in my recovery that it won't be too much longer perhaps another year or so until I'm healed. My gut instincts tell me at 3 years off I'll be more healed but I think by 4 years off is where I feel I'll really be healed fully. While I was taking 5htp I never listened to my gut instincts, and at that time it was telling me I should go off 5htp. I will from here on out definitely listen to my gut feelings for the rest of my life. But more importantly after all this I want to help myself and my family be successful, happy and healthy

 

Johnson

[bluebalu86]

Hi Johnson

 

The man I fell in love with has PSSD. It's not a problem for me and I wouldn't love him any less because of it. I'm sure you'll manage to find a partner who understands and accepts you as you are. You certainly deserve to be loved and cherished. I hope you find the right person to be happy with. I wish you success on your continued recovery. 

[johnson]

Hi All,

 

It's been a while since I've written an update. I still struggle daily with sexual dysfunction, frequent urination, tension and headaches. It's hard to say how much everything has improved or if I am recovering. I guess after 3 years I had hoped to be fully recovered or at least close to it.

 

Sometimes I feel as though i'm getting better. So I don't really know for sure. I'm getting tired of this though. It's been 3 years and 1 month since I last took 5thp. I am not taking any pills or supplements or anti-biotics or herbal crap. Just magnesium to help with my headaches and advil when I need it. That's it.

 

I believe 5htp is main the reason my life went downhill but not the only reason. I think taking wellbutrin, paxil, accutane in the past is also part of the reason I'm still struggling today.

 

In spite of all this, this coming new year I am planning to get out and will try my best to get on with my life and accomplish my goals.

I guess what keeps me going is my family, the hope that I will recover and hopefully meet someone nice.

 

I wish you all the best for the new year.

[johnson]

Hi,

 

It's been a while since I've posted an update. I stopped taking 5HTP over 3.5 years ago. I haven't taken anything else since except magnesium and Tylenol when I get headaches.

 

My main issues are still sexual dysfunction, muscle tension and headaches. To be honest I don't know if it's stress or 5HTP or other factors(past history) that's caused me to still have these problems after all these years. But I've been tested by my doctors and never found anything wrong with me.

 

If I fully recover I'll definitely post back. But I just wanted to say if anyone decides to take 5htp, st.john's wort or SAM-E and end up having similar issues like I did than you may know what caused it.

 

thanks and take care.

 

And one other thing, thanks to Alto for letting me post my story here. Even though I didn't end up here because of taking Anti-Depressants.

thanks.

[cathyfrench]

Hi Johnson,

 

I hope you don't mind me contacting you. I read your story and saw that like me you suffered from PGAD and tinnitus while withdrawing. I took Sertraline for only 3 weeks this year and after bringing down the drug from a 50 mg dose to a 25mg dose, I started suffering from a heavy and painful bladder, constant arousal, need to urinate all the time,, tingling sensations etc.At first my doctor thought it was  UTI but my urine came clear, a cystoscopy was done and I was told it isn't an interstitial cysticis either. I found this site and realised that a lot of members have been suffering from PGAD and had the same symptoms as me. My psychiatrist made me stop Sertraline in a week to replace it with anafranil. It was 1 month ago. My tinnitus got worse and I kept the PGAD.I saw you also had tinnitus while withdrawing. I have very very loud tinnitus since stopping Sertraline and since stopping several benzos that I took for only 4 months from January to February before stopping them cold turkey as advised by my psychiatrist. Iam now off Sertraline and anafranil but I still have PGAD and a high-pitched tinnitus. My life is awful and I spend my days on my bed praying that the PGAD and the tinnitus stop. As I am desperate, I am contacting people who had a similar Journey to find reassurance. My tinnitus is very loud. Was yours very loud also and did it went away ? Do you still have PGAD ? How long did it take for it to quiet down ? How are you doing now ? Did you succeed to bring back your life together ?

 

I hope you are doing well now and that you can reassure me that these symptoms will go and that there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

 

Thanks a lot

Cathy

 

 

 

[johnson]

Hi All, 

 

I haven't posted any updates in a while. It's been over 5 years and unfortunately I'm still struggling daily with sexual dysfunction, tension and headaches.

 

The good news is that my frequent urination and pgad have improved a lot and calmed down and I don't think about as much anymore. Though its still there. The tension in my neck head and shoulders has improved as well(though not as much as I had hoped). Using magnesium lotion daily has helped reduce the tension.  

 

I still can't believe I'm going through this after 5 years and would have thought that I could have written my success story but I'm not there yet. I really hope for real my next update will be my success story. For anyone currently struggling you have to keep fighting and take things one day at a time. There are a few good recovery stories as well to cheer you up when you are feeling down. I hope that when I write my recovery story soon that it can also help cheer people up and be more positive. Keep fighting. 

[Gridley]

Thanks for checking back in.  I'm glad you're having improvements in at least some areas, which does show that healing is occurring.  Please keep up undated when you can.  I found this post by apace, one of our moderators, to be encouraging, especially for those in the long haul:

 

“Over time the brain will return to homeostasis and healing will occur.  How long that will take  and what that means when taking a healing brain along with the passage of time and mixing it all up is anyone's guess.  The success stories, while they did take more time (in most cases) than any of us would like, seem to indicate that there is substantial healing and a lot of people come out "on the other side" feeling better about life and themselves than they did either before or during the use of the drugs.

 

"It would be misleading and, frankly, unethical for me to tell you "don't worry -- you'll be fine in x months."  The reality, as you already know, is frequently different.  But, at the end of the day, the people who have been doing this for a long time tell us that healing will happen and we have no reason to doubt that.  The Success Stories bear that out as well and they also indicate that even those among us who are really sick and dealing with hellacious symptoms will, in the long run, see healing and recover."

 

 

 

[johnson]

Thanks for your encouraging message Gridley. And thanks Alto for giving me a place to share my story.

 

Today is 5.5 years off 5htp. My daily symptoms are tension in neck/shoulders, headaches and sexual dysfunction and slight dizziness. 

 

I don't take any pills or supplements at all. I don't drink alcohol or smoke cigarettes or weed. No fastfood, processed foods, canned foods etc. I do eat a little junkfood(cake) but not a lot as it contains too much sugar. 
I've cut out dairy completely and it has helped with my allergies quite a bit. I've reduced meat quite a bit, but still eat meat on a daily basis just not as much. That's helped with my energy and feeling less tired and bloated overall. I've increased my intake of fresh fruits and veggies. I get about 7 hours of sleep each night. I sleep a little more on the weekend and take a lot of naps on the weekends. I don't work a stressful job thankfully. The most stressful part of it is the drive. But it's not too bad. I go for walks to a close nearby park when I can. 

 

I've been to my doctor multiple times over the years, had bloodwork, x-rays mri's. Seen physio, massage therapists, chiro, acupuncture. But the doctor couldn't find anything wrong with me. And none of those therapies help with my symptoms they only make it worse. 

 

I'm turning 36 soon. This mess started just before my 30th birthday. I feel like i'm just wasting a lot of good years and losing time. And it's not like my life was that great before my 30th birthday either. I work full-time job but when I get home from work I don't have energy to do anything else and the tension/headaches seem to make sure of that unfortunately. I still live at home with my parents. I'm not sure what else to do or think at this point. I never thought my life would have turned out like this(though I don't think this current situation in my life is permanent. But I worry). I still have hope that one day i'll be back to 'my normal' again and feel better then even before I ever started taking anything. But after 5.5 years I just don't know. For anyone who read this sorry if it's not encouraging. I hope to write an encouraging message someday soon I hope. Though I've probably been saying that for a while. I will say i've learned a lot about myself and practicing good health over the years and especially these past 6. I've learned how to cope and deal with my anxiety/depression/ocd etc all without taking any meds or supplements. So I guess all is not completely lost. 

Timeline of everything so far below.

 

Timeline 2001 – accutane for acne(later found out all the side effects including suicide)

2001 - 2002 – first started taking paxil, used it infrequently on and off, became severely suicidal and extremely depressed no motivation, lots of fear of the world/people/everything

2003 - 2005 – allergy shots once a month, took recreational drugs and binge drinking a lot

2006 - 2008 – wellbutrin/bupropion on and off 

2009 – 2012 - Took 5htp. 2012 just turned 30 sleep issues, weight loss, stomach issues and severe pssd. Stopped taking 5htp in nov of 2012 for good. Also stopped all supplments(sage, multivita, b12, protein powder, amino acids, apple cider vinegar, fish oil. Continued magnesium supplement though)

2013 – frequent urination, severe pgad and depression

2014 - tension/headaches

2015 – lower back problems

2016- problems with headaches/tension/pssd/pgad continue

2017- turned 35, concerned about life passing me by and still being stuck and fallen behind everyone. End of the year got major vertigo

2018 – veritgo continues though not as bad, tension/headaches and pssd still continues and still a struggle and affecting daily life. Pgad has subsided quite a bit. Stopped dairy, reduced meat intake. Allergies improve. Really desperate for this to end and get my life back and feel better than I ever have in my life!

[johnson]

Topic title:  Question to those that have recovered....

 

Hi, 

 

I Hope this is the right place to post this question. I'm looking for some encouragement as I've been struggling for a really long time now. 

 

My question is for those of you that have recovered from withdrawal, how did recovery happen for you? Was it gradual over time or did you suddenly wake up one day and instantly feel better? Did you feel like the light at the end of the tunnel was near? Did your gut(voice inside) give you a good felling like this nightmare would be over? 

 

I know people say recovery isn't linear but I was just curious as to how your recovery happened for you. 

 

Thanks for your time. 

 

Edited March 19, 2019 by ChessieCat
added topic title

[Liamb123456]

How long are you off meds now?? 

[ChessieCat]

Many of the members who have posted success stories are no longer visiting SA.  I suggest that you check out their stories yourself.  You can always post questions directly to the member in their topic.  If you hover over their avatar you can see when they lasted visited the site.

 

Success stories: Recovery from withdrawal

[johnson]

Thanks chessie. That's a good idea. 

I don't blame them for not coming back! 

[puthappinessfirst]

Hi J,

 

You've gotten some great advice so I don't have much to add on that front, but just want to say that I a rooting for you! You have been so patient through this whole ordeal for a long time now. You're doing awesome. 35 is still so young. You've got this! 

[johnson]

1 hour ago, puthappinessfirst said:

Hi J,

 

You've gotten some great advice so I don't have much to add on that front, but just want to say that I a rooting for you! You have been so patient through this whole ordeal for a long time now. You're doing awesome. 35 is still so young. You've got this! 

Thank you so much for your encouragement! I really need it right now. It's so hard to be patient because this has lasted so long and I think I'm doing almost everything I possibly could to make sure I recover. 

 

I wish you all the best. 

[Guest]

Are you saying you experienced 5 years withdrawal from 5htp? That’s not an antidepressants it’s just an amino acid isn’t it? 

[Guest]

as far as i know, SSRIS down regulate receptors by inhibiting reuptake and because those receptors are essentially not functioning when you come off, your ability to absorb serotonin is gone and excitatory transmitters turn on which leads to high norepinephrine, and low nutrient levels.....however 5htp doesn't down regulate receptors, it just makes serotonin more bioavailable, which leads to strengthening receptors because they have more of the stuff then need to get back to working again....ive heard that serotonin syndrome can lead to sexual dysfunction....and protracted withdrawal from SSRIS, but im pretty sure the 5htp is not what did it because only if you overdose on the 5htp you will begin to see problems with erections, because you are overflowing the receptors with serotonin and they begin to get worn out and actually stop taking in as much , its like overdoing a muscle, eventually it will actually backfire because you aren't giving it the opportunity to grow , but sexual dysunfction from SSRIS can last as long as a decade , ive had it for 7 years, and immediately after i took 5htp i noticed improvements....so thats why im saying all of this....however it does not mean im correct, ive never heard of PSSD from 5htp, not once, but ive heard COUNTLESS stories of PSSD from SSRIS , that go on for as long as a decade.....so im going to conclude that its not the 5htp, however im not necessarily correct 

[IWantToHeal]

How are you getting on now johnson?