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☼ Hello. mammaP checking in!


mammaP

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Hi Mamma there are plenty of reports of damage to bones from ssri... and something in beer that is suppose to help silicone but not that sort I guess ...something in Keiths pale ale :) have one for me too as I can't drink and my bone scan is not so hot.  I am surprised you have not had a bone scan yet I have been having them for years...glad you have some plants to water... hope the bp comes down.. are you taking your mag?  I think it helps my bp. 

Have a nice trip and take good care. 

peace B

WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG
Had a car accident in 85
Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89
Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year
Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above.
One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking.

As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/

There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in :)

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Hi BP, beer sounds good but I would only have to sniff it to be drunk as a skunk  :P

 

I've had heaps of bone scans, the last scan was MRI but never had a bone density scan. I don't understand why the other stuff didn't show on bone scans but maybe they only looked at what they were dealing with at the time.  I'm taking my magnesium  but ran out for a week so maybe that is why my BP went up.

It does tend to be erratic anyway, sometimes high and other times very low. The doctor said my body isn't making the hormone that regulates BP, but we know it is all down to the central nervous system. I'm glad she didn't offer me drugs. I have to go back in 2 weeks so will try and have a relaxing time before that so it isn't high again.  

 

I'm feeling fed up with this body of mine, I was hoping the new hips and knees would give me a new lease of life but there is always something else that comes along. I can't take anything for the pain that doesn't make me sick so have to put up with it and try distraction. It's a wonder I am not a pillar of salt with all the salt baths,  epsom salt and dead sea salt are amazing, I use lots of it and almost every day for the pain.  I have some body shop hemp oil hand cream and put loads of that on my hands with a pair of gloves that have magnetic dots and that helps a bit. 

 

Sleep, I am back to sleeping very little with just 30 minutes or so  at a time and waking groggy not knowing where I am. I am constantly tired but just stay asleep. I can go to bed when my eyes just wont stay open, fall asleep and wake up thinking hours have passed but it's only been 20-30 minutes. I don't stress about it and know it will pass but today I have to collect the grandkidlets and occupy them till mum finishes work, then stay over and share a room with them so wont get any sleep tonight, wedding tomorrow and stay over again so another sleepless night.  By Monday I will be utterly exhausted. Didn't sleep much last weekend because we were away, and before that I gave my bed up for my sister and had the guest bed which isn't very comfy. 

 

Writing all this down there's little wonder I'm exhausted!  It's been full on with little sleep  :blink: .  When I get back I will black out the window and sort out some music. Sadly my old clock died that had sleep sounds and dawn chorus  :( . I need to buy myself another one, yes that's what I'll do. I have my dawn simulator clock/light box but it doesn't have sleep sounds and I love those. 

 

It's lunchtime so better get a wiggle on and get dressed then go and get the boys, will be back later when I can't sleep.  ;)

Just realised not having mag for a week will have affected sleep too! 

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

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Thank you mammaP for all you do. You are a precious gem. I have been reading your thread. It amazing how you are able to cope. Glass half full! But I know why you are so strong. You have helped me in more ways you can know.

I am not a medical professional. My comments and posts are based on personal experiences. Please consult appropriate medical professionals for advice. 

I was started on psych drugs back in the late 80's. You name it. I probably was on it. Tapered off final cocktail 2013-2019. For Hashimotos and high blood pressure I take Levothyroxine. Liothyronine. Spironolactone. Hydrochlorothiazide. Losartan. B12 hydroxy. Fish oil w/D3. Bee pollen. Magnesium Glycinate.

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MammaP,

 

Sorry not to have noticed your last post.  I know it is a constant battle but nobody does it with more grace and dignity than you do.

 

You are such a strong person with such incredible insights for so many people.  Please know that the things you do for others on this site are deeply, deeply valued.

 

Best,

 

Andy

Sertraline 50mg and Clonazapam .375mg from 2000 -- symptoms of dizziness Spring 2012

increased to .5 Clonazapam and 100mg Sertraline -- no improvement

Benzo microtaper from November 2012 to November 2014 (followed benzo sites "taper benzo first")

Started Sertraline taper in December 2014 cut by 25mg to 75mg; 62.5mg 1/1/15 and 50mg on 2/1/15

Held at 50mg through April 5 to use liquid 
Reduced dosage in 10% or less drops from 50mg to 25mg -- at single tablet of 25mg on 10/5/15

Transitioned to all liquid for accuracy while tapering -- Horrible insomnia -- back to 25mg liquid and held until October 1, 2016

10/16 -- 11/18 tapered very slowly to 10.6mg.  No real improvement and never really stable so updosed to 12.5mg (1/2 a pill) for convenience and long hold.

After 8+ months of holding with no noticeable improvement decided to add .4ml of liquid Prozac (about 1.5mg) to see if that improves the situation

Supplements, Magnesium, D3, Omega 3, curcumin, Valerian, 81mg Aspirin, L-Theanine, Vit. C,

 

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I am going to try dead sea salts I bought some but did not use them yet what can I expect do you add it to the epson salt or use it alone in the bath?

 

I am at a point I can't sleep without mag.. I have it ground up 300mg ground in the coffee grinder I cover it with another lid and leave ready in the kitchen... I get up almost every night and take some as I always forget and have to get up.  My bp is irratic too has been for years now but it if gets bad enuff to cause symptoms I head for my mag lid.. that is what started me doing small top ups thru out the day... symptoms. I hope it helps your sleep to add it back in.  

 

I did some research on the beer thing and found this link

https://www.organicfacts.net/health-benefits/minerals/health-benefits-of-silicon.html

 

There are lots of foods too that have silicon here is the list they offered in case you don't want to read it all

The most important sources of silicon are apples,cereals, raw cabbage, peanuts, carrots, onions,cucumber, pumpkin, fish, unrefined grains, oats,almonds and oranges. 

 

I am sorry to hear you sleep it off again my was last wk and seems to be better this wk.. like you I no longer sweat it I have enough stress... likely why I am not sleeping. 

 

 

I use a lot of liniment... called absorbine it seems to be the only one where the smell does not make me sick... I have tried them all some deep cold ones are not bad either... in all of them the active ingredient is menthol ... but it seems the amount varies as do the scents... I found a spay one once that worked better it was great as I spray it on places I could not reach...but the smell made me so sick I would rather have the pain if I had to choose... so in the garbage it went... all the things I throw out cost money...but I can't tolerate them in the house ... so out they go.  I wish I could find a person to give them to so it is not a complete waste ...many things most are used once and out they go.. not good for landfill either.   It can't be helped I guess as most things you can't smell before you buy... 

I hope you sleep tonight it could happen that fast take some mag ...bam sleep. and then a nice wedding 

Wishing you peace Mamma 

WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG
Had a car accident in 85
Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89
Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year
Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above.
One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking.

As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/

There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in :)

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MammaP,

 

Sorry not to have noticed your last post.  I know it is a constant battle but nobody does it with more grace and dignity than you do.

 

You are such a strong person with such incredible insights for so many people.  Please know that the things you do for others on this site are deeply, deeply valued.

 

Best,

 

Andy

I will second that!!! :D

WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG
Had a car accident in 85
Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89
Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year
Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above.
One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking.

As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/

There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in :)

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Thank you for your lovely comments  :wub: . BT I use half dead sea salt and half epsom salt, or 4 cups of whatever if I have run out of one of them. I should order both at once but buy it in bulk and the boxes are so heavy!  

 

I am feeling really grotty and don't know if I have virus or a wave. My head hurts, eyes are swollen and I'm squinting through half closed eyes. One of them is lazy and doesn't work well, the other has a huge stye that is covering the whole lid, red and itchy. Camomile teabags helped earlier and it burst but still swollen. It's a holiday today so chemist and doctors closed too. Sinuses are painful and blocked and my head hurts. Don't try to imagine all that, it will scare you  :lol: .

 

 

On a positive note all my pots are now planted and the flowers are starting to open so it's looking good, shame I can't see them from my window, I have to go out and see them when I come back in.  It's nice to sit out there when it's sunny.  :D

I am going to make a cup of camomile tea and put the teabags on my eyes, such a good look  :P

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

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MP, you are such a trip! Maybe the teabag look will catch on?

 

So I'll ask google but I am sure you aren't celebrating Memorial Day in the UK. Have a nice holiday tho!

 

Oh hey! This sounds fun:

 

Spring Bank Holiday in United Kingdom

 

The spring bank holiday, also known as the late May bank holiday, is a time for people in the United Kingdom to have a day off work or school. It falls on the last Monday of May but it used to be on the Monday after Pentecost.

 

springbankhol.jpg?1

Many people enjoy the Spring Bank Holiday with relaxing meals.

 

What Do People Do?

 

For many people the spring bank holiday is a pleasant day off work or school. Some people choose to take a short trip or vacation. Others use the time to walk in the country, catch up with family and friends, visit garden centers or do home maintenance. However, in some parts of the United Kingdom, there are some customs associated with this day.

 

On Cooper's Hill in Brockworth, Gloucestershire, people race down a steep hill following a large round cheese. The hill is concave and has an incline of 1:1 in some places. The first person to cross the finishing line wins a Double Gloucester cheese weighing about 8lbs (around 3.5kg). The custom may have been started by the Romans or ancient Britons and be an ancient fertility rite or a way of guaranteeing the rights of the villagers to graze their livestock on the surrounding land. In some years, there have been a lot of injuries, causing the event to be cancelled a couple of times in recent years. In these years, the cheese was rolled down the hill, but nobody was allowed to chase it.

 

In Endon in Staffordshire, the villagers dress their well, hold a fayre (village celebration) and crown a girl as the Well Dressing Queen. Local men hold a competition, known as 'Tossing the Sheaf', in which they compete to see who can toss a bale of straw the highest. In other places, boats are blessed, Morris dancers put on displays and local festivals are held.

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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Hi mammaP

 

You asked in my thread about blue light.  I posted my response there. Link

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.
1997-1999 Effexor; 2002-2005 Effexor XR 37.5 mg linear taper, dropping same #beads/week with bad results

Cymbalta 60 mg 2012 - 2015; 2016: 20 mg to 7 mg exact doses and dates in this post; 2017: 6.3 mg to  0.0 mg  Aug. 12; details here


scallywag's Introduction
Online spreadsheet for dose taper calculations and nz11's THE WORKS spreadsheet

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I was given a good idea by a lady in the drug store for sinus... apple cider vinegar in a pot of water on the stove it really helped me one time.  

 

I hope your sinus and eyes are better now... could be those flowers do you think.. I had a lady post on my thread last wk saying that people who have benzo wd state that there are 4 stages of wd and the last one is sensitivities to many things... 

maybe we are both in the last stage...

 

could it be... could we be close to the end of this?  

 

What a glorious day that will be... now think on that... :) to be finally just done with it all... and do whatever we want within old lady reason that is :)

 

I so wish you peace Mamma 

WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG
Had a car accident in 85
Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89
Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year
Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above.
One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking.

As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/

There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in :)

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • Moderator Emeritus

I wanted to update with a really odd experience.  I've often said that I don't know what 'normal' feels like. After being on and off different drugs from 19 years old and now knowing the truth about drugs I don't know when I've been 'happy' or 'high', 'depressed' or just tired, lonely, sad etc. As a child I would be elated if someone was nice to me, and had a lot of trauma as a teenager so had more than my fair share of sadness. I'm sure lots of you are in the same situation now. 

 

A little bit of history, when I had breast cancer and had surgery to remove it I woke up from surgery with no pain, not even a twinge. It was a shock to me because I didn't realise how much pain I lived with all my life, until it was taken away. I had surgery before but this was the first time I had been totally pain free. It didn't last long but I never forgot that feeling. 

 

Back to the present. One day I woke up after  a 4 hour sleep ( a rarity for me to get 4 hours at once ). I was up, showered and dressed by 7.30. I felt fine, and got lots done in the house, planted some pots and changed my little fish's water. Cooked dinner and went to the shop. I wasn't elated and excited, but calm and in the moment. I cooked and didn't burn it. My body hurt but not too much. I thought I was doing ok, that this is IT, how it will be, given my age and physical health. 

It reminded me of the surgery, when I realised what it was like not to be in pain. I think I had a day of 'normal', maybe a real window. Whatever it was I've gone back through everything I did to see if there was anything different but can't pin point anything. I will be very happy if that can be my life, even with the pain it was a good day. The pain wasn't that bad, but manageable and not having me yelping when I moved. That will do for me. I wonder how long it will be before I have another, most of my windows have been very good and possibly a bit manic, I can't remember ever feeling like that day, ever and I am intrigued!

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

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MamaP I enjoyed reading your update post.  I am like you and wonder what my true "normal" is or if I even have one anymore.  Congratulations on having a good day and I hope there are many more to come very soon!

1995 - 2015 antidepressants and antianxiety medicine
Multiple failed attempts to quit/taper anti d/anti anxiety meds since 2008

June 17, 2016 began prozac bridge to get off of effexor xr, stopped effexor xr on June 24, 2016, could not tolerate prozac due to severe side effects so I had to stop it  Currently...300 mg ER of lithium, 1 mg of estradiol, 60 mg propranolol ER, Fish oil 2 x a day, Magnesium Glycinate,  zinc, vitamin c, vitamin d, NAC

 

 

 

 

 

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I'm so sorry you've gone through so much in your life but it's lovely to hear about your peaceful days. You deserve it!

2000 - sertraline for job anxiety low confidence (17 years old) ..which turned the next 16 years into nightmare!

 

On/off sertraline severe withdrawals every time. 2014 - felt better as reduced dose of sertraline no more inner restlessness. Doctor rushed off again. Hit severe withdrawal. Lost the little I had in life. Couldn't get stable again on 12.5mg. Was switched to prozac. Had severe reaction to prozac..came off in November 2015 at 6mg as felt more confused and damaged on it..Even more withdrawal ..rage, depression, dyphoria, near constant suicidal ideation, self harm impulses, doom, concrete block in head, unable to do much of anything with this feeling in head..went back on 6mg of sertraline to see if would alleviate anything. It didn't..reduced from December to June 2016 came off at 2.5mg sertraline as was hospitalised for the severe rage, suicidal impulses, and put on 50mg lofepramine which in 2nd week reduced all symptoms but gave insomnia which still have..psych stopped lofepramine cold turkey..no increased withdrawal symptoms new symptoms from lofepramine except persistant insomnia which has as side effect.

 

Taking Ativan for 8 months for the severe rage self harm impulses 1-3 times a week (mostly 2 times a week) at .5mg. Two months (I'm unsure exactly when the interdose started to happen) ago interdose withdrawal seemed to happen..2 days I think after the Ativan.

 

 

Nightmare that could have been avoided!

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MamaP I enjoyed reading your update post.  I am like you and wonder what my true "normal" is or if I even have one anymore.  Congratulations on having a good day and I hope there are many more to come very soon!

Thanks DG, it seems like such a long time ago now as the days roll by, hopefully there will be more where that one came from. :)

 

 

I'm so sorry you've gone through so much in your life but it's lovely to hear about your peaceful days. You deserve it!

Thanks LL, I've certainly been through the mill but lots have been through much worse and going through worse too, I read people's struggles here, those who are just going into the withdrawal hell and really feel for them, I am thankful that my worst days are over and I've had at least one 'normal' day but have to admit that I did enjoy the hyper ones too ;) 

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

I will be very happy if that can be my life, even with the pain it was a good day. The pain wasn't that bad, but manageable and not having me yelping when I moved. That will do for me. I wonder how long it will be before I have another, most of my windows have been very good and possibly a bit manic, I can't remember ever feeling like that day, ever and I am intrigued!

 

Good update, mammaP. I hope this window stays open for you for a good long time!

 

Best,

 

Andy

Sertraline 50mg and Clonazapam .375mg from 2000 -- symptoms of dizziness Spring 2012

increased to .5 Clonazapam and 100mg Sertraline -- no improvement

Benzo microtaper from November 2012 to November 2014 (followed benzo sites "taper benzo first")

Started Sertraline taper in December 2014 cut by 25mg to 75mg; 62.5mg 1/1/15 and 50mg on 2/1/15

Held at 50mg through April 5 to use liquid 
Reduced dosage in 10% or less drops from 50mg to 25mg -- at single tablet of 25mg on 10/5/15

Transitioned to all liquid for accuracy while tapering -- Horrible insomnia -- back to 25mg liquid and held until October 1, 2016

10/16 -- 11/18 tapered very slowly to 10.6mg.  No real improvement and never really stable so updosed to 12.5mg (1/2 a pill) for convenience and long hold.

After 8+ months of holding with no noticeable improvement decided to add .4ml of liquid Prozac (about 1.5mg) to see if that improves the situation

Supplements, Magnesium, D3, Omega 3, curcumin, Valerian, 81mg Aspirin, L-Theanine, Vit. C,

 

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • Moderator Emeritus

My one day freshly cleaned crystal clear window now seems a distant memory.  Really struggling now, after a few days away looking after my grandsons. I love being with them and hate being here on my own but am worn out. The latest cut to tramadol has hit me with withdrawal, I started  thinking that 2% per week then a hold would be ok but It's been approx 2% per month.  I don't go by a calendar or even look at when I last cut but listen to my body and cut when I've had a few weeks at being reasonably stable. It has worked ok but taken nearly 5 months to drop 18% and I thought it might be easier than effexor!  I feel very emotional and weepy, exhausted and my whole body hurts. So much that I wish I could take the 100mg I used to take for the pain, but now it would make me ill.  I know it will pass and hope it doesn't last very long. 

 

I have more news, I have signed up for an addiction counselling course. It covers drugs, alcohol, prescription drugs and gambling.  I've learned so much here and have had people ask me about opiate and narcotic addiction, but haven't a clue because it is so different to psych drugs. If I can help those in real life too it will be worth it, and also might give me more understanding here. It will be at my own pace and take as long as I need. I will get a lovely certificate at the end to wave around with pride.  :D

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

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MammaP when you ssuffer, I suffer with you. Thank you for the lovely information and your personal experience you shared on my thread. It made me think of these words that you know well. "The meditation of my heart, the thoughts I ponder through the day, may they be pleasing to you Lord, and keep me steadfast in your way, when worries weigh upon my mind. And make me

restless in the night, then may I meditate on you and things I know to be upright. " What a fine example of perseverance.

I am not a medical professional. My comments and posts are based on personal experiences. Please consult appropriate medical professionals for advice. 

I was started on psych drugs back in the late 80's. You name it. I probably was on it. Tapered off final cocktail 2013-2019. For Hashimotos and high blood pressure I take Levothyroxine. Liothyronine. Spironolactone. Hydrochlorothiazide. Losartan. B12 hydroxy. Fish oil w/D3. Bee pollen. Magnesium Glycinate.

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Hi MammaP,

 

Wishing you well and healing.

 

Yana

2010 started 10 mg celexa, 2011 went up to 20 mg

06/2014 started tapering (20 mg,10 mg alternate days)

19/09/2014 crashed at 10 mg

20/09/2014 updosed to 20 mg to try and stabilize- Never stabilized and CNS basically plummeted

August 31 2015- Started my 5% taper anyways

May 3 2016- At 14 mg the tapering caught up with me- Withdrawal included severe anxiety, feeling like im on speed, suicidal and homicidal ideation, akathesia, feeling like I was on heroin, memory loss, PGAD, feeling like I was on an acid

May 4 2016- Updosed to 15.5 mg to try and stabilize

​June 4- Started taking 2 mg 5 times a day which adds up to 10 mg because of akathesia when taking my full dose. Akathesia symtpoms smaller

July 27th- Dropped from 15.5 mg to 10 mg because could no longer tolerate taking drug- bad side effects mainly akathesia and emotional deadness.

​Oct 11- Improved a lot since May 4th after my crash. Withdrawal symptoms still left- DR/DP, emotional anasthesia, akathesia, tingling in head, feeling like my body and face disappears, messed up sound interpretation, perception and difficulty reading social and emotional cues during DR/DP, apathy, inability to tell if I am in dream or reality, disturbed sleep. Started having few windows

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  • 1 month later...

Through your writing and attitude, you are an inspirational angel, MamaP.

Just sayin'.

 

Peace & love to you from West Lothian.

Born 1945. 

1999 - First Effexor/Venlafaxine

2016 Withdrawal research. Effexor.  13Jul - 212.5mg;  6Aug - 200.0mg;  24Aug - 187.5mg;  13Sep - 175.0mg;  3Oct - 162.5mg;  26Oct - 150mg 

2017  9Jan - 150.00mg;  23Mar - 137.50mg;  24Apr - 125.00mg;  31May - 112.50mg holding;  3Sep - 100.00mg;  20Sep - 93.75mg;  20Oct - 87.5mg;  12Nov - 81.25mg;  13 Dec - 75.00mg

2018  18Jan - 69.1mg; 16Feb - 62.5mg; 16March - 57.5mg (-8%); 22Apr - 56.3mg(-2%); CRASHED - Updose 29May - 62.5mg; Updose - 1Jul - 75.0mg. Updose - 2Aug - 87.5mg. Updose - 27Aug - 100.0mg. Updose - 11Oct 112.5mg. Updose - 6Nov 125.00mg

2019 Updoses 19 Jan - 150.0mg. 1April - 162.5mg. 24 April - Feeling better - doing tasks, getting outside.  7 May - usual depression questionnaire gives "probably no depression" result.

Supps/Vits  Omega 3;  Chelated Magnesium;  Prebiotics/Probiotics, Vit D3. 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

I just read through your entire thread. You started posting with posting several times daily, oftentimes feeling suicidal, to most recently just periodic check-ins, sharing about a window reminding you what "normal" feels like! Pretty amazing courage and progress?

My suggestions are not medical advice. They are my opinions based on my own experience, strength and hope.

You are in charge of your own medical / healing / recovery choices.

My success story |  My introduction thread

 

ZOLOFT FREE - COMPLETELY DRUG FREE 4/28/2019! - total time on 28+ years

BENZO FREE! 4/7/2018 - total time on 27+ years

REMERON FREE! 12/11/2016 - total time on 15 months

Caffeine & Nicotine Free 2014 / 2015 - smoked for 28 years

Alcohol Free 4/1/2014 - drank for 30 years

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Thank you for all your comments.  I was thinking just yesterday how I was one of those who dominated the board when I was new here. This became my world and I logged all my frustrations here. I haven't read my whole thread through and am almost scared to, it's been a roller coaster ride these last few years.  I didn't feel my last tramadol cut in any way so that is good.  Hopefully future ones will be ok too. The next one will take me to 40mg, that's 20% down from when I started at 50mg in Feb. Non addictive the doctor said, I'll never trust a doctor again when they talk about the drugs they prescribe.  Last night I saw a documentary on tv about car crash tests and it showed the rigorous tests new cars go through to get their rating. 5* are safest.  Then they went to websites and looked at reviews which contradicted those ratings. They said not to trust manufacturer reports and tests but to look at real world reports from real people.  It made me think of this site, real world experiences from real people and not the reports and trials from the drug manufacturers.  Doctors hate people looking on the internet and roll their eyes when people say they've seen reports online, but we are real people with real experiences and slowly the truth is becoming clearer. 

 

I went away to Scotland to visit family and it was amazing but came back exhausted, I never learn and always do too much and want to cram in as much as possible.  Spent a lot of ti,e with my wee great granddaughter who is a darling 4 year old. We sat under her little frozen umbrella and sang silly rain songs. Raindrops are falling on my head, it's raining it's pouring the old man is snoring....etc. It was so much fun and she was delighted. Every time I went in she brought the umbrella for 'Grammy'  :wub: .  Arrived home then next day went to my daughters for the weekend and now house/cat sitting for friends so still living out of a suitcase  :lol: .   Today I went to look at an apartment in the little village I lived in before I moved here, it's a really nice area, bustling but in a quiet kind of way. Where I live is beautiful, rural and very quiet but so isolated that I can go a week without seeing a single person. It is so far from anywhere and I aren't always up to the 30 minute drive to get anywhere. Then I don't want to go out and become phobic about driving. If I get the place I will be back among my friends,   my congregation and the little cafes and shops are in walking distance.  Isolation isn't good for anyone and leads to agoraphobia, I was housebound for years and it isn't good. 

 

People need people but not the ones who drain the life out of them. I've realised that when I talked about all things negative I attracted similar negative people and we had some real 'pity parties'.  After I learned to 'change the channel' the negative people started to drop away in the same way that the positive people dropped away when I was constantly talking about depression and my traumatic life.  I've had some major traumas and health problems but they are in the past where they belong. I can think about some of the traumas now and not feel anything, they've lost their grip. Letting go of the psychiatric trauma is harder!  I still get really bad lows,  the crippling lows that have plagued me since I was 13 or 14, very very low but they always passed and still pass. I need people at those times but tend to withdraw from them, like many others I suspect.  Just having someone close by is good, not talking just being there. 

 

Have rambled again, I'm good at rambling and now it's time for bed. Goodnight my SA friends  :wub:

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

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  • 3 weeks later...

Hi mammaP. How is your taper going?

I am not a medical professional. My comments and posts are based on personal experiences. Please consult appropriate medical professionals for advice. 

I was started on psych drugs back in the late 80's. You name it. I probably was on it. Tapered off final cocktail 2013-2019. For Hashimotos and high blood pressure I take Levothyroxine. Liothyronine. Spironolactone. Hydrochlorothiazide. Losartan. B12 hydroxy. Fish oil w/D3. Bee pollen. Magnesium Glycinate.

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  • 5 months later...
  • Moderator Emeritus

Can't believe it's been so long since I updated here!  I moved into the place I looked at in my last post and since then life has been moving so fast. Was oiffline for  a while, then my laptop gave up, bought a chromebook which promptly died after an hour, got that sorted out a week later then the intenet went down! All this would have driven me insane a few months ago but moving here has been great because I can go out most days so the internet isn't my life. I have friends who I call on, some disabled ones and 2 that I meet up with for lunch regularly. An advantage of being retired is that some of the restaurants have pensioner special days and good discounts. Its worth getting old for those lunches  ;) .  I am just yards from the high street with lots of independent shops, there is a salon next door where I get regular back massages which make a huge difference.   I see my little grandsons and love looking after them (in small doses)! They came yesterday and we went swimming, then swimming again today. It was lovely, no effort needed, they love being in the water and I can just bob up and down while watching them have fun. Then to the park where they ran around and I sat and watched.  When I brought them home they told Mum they had the best day ever with grandma  :wub: .   It has been a good move, the last place was very isolated, beautiful surroundings but couldn't get out much so was very isolated and stressed. There was a lot of family trauma that was hard to cope with but that is all settled now and everyone doing ok here. 

 

My taper is going very slowly and the slightest blip causes awful waves that have me back to aquare one. Even knowing all about withdrawal doesn't lessen the awful symptoms and  then I really need to be here to remind myself that it doesn't last. I went to my daughters for a one night stay and didn't realise that the strip I carry in my bag was empty. ( I have a strip in every bag I have to be sure!)  I missed one dose and was plunged into withdrawal, brain zaps, dizziness, akathisia, pain and brain fog that goes with SNRI withdrawal. Also the diarrhoea, sweating, vomiting and shaking that comes from the opiate withdrawal.  Thankfully it has now subsided and I feel so glad that I can get my scripts and carry on tapering. It is slow going but will get there in the end. 

I am feeling the side effects again, they lessened for a while but are back but they will get less again. Cog fog, memory is failing again after improving when I finally got off the effexor. It takes forever to type and the back key gets more use then any other! I can't remember what I have read and have to read things over and over again to get the sense of it. Sleep is just the same as ever, with many sleepless nights and only a few hours broken sleep at best. Another side effect listed. It did improve a bit, but has gone downhill again despite being more active. I forgot to check I had enough tramadol when I went away overnight, these side effects ramped up before I missed the dose. I'm going to have a good long hold before another drop and just ride the side effects. Its not forever and I know that withdrawal can be much worse so a hold will be best after my mishap. 

 

Unfortunately I don't have a bath at the new place and REALLY miss my epsom salt baths, when I go to my daughters I love climbing into the bath with lots of epsom salts and eucalyptus. I have a foot bath at home but it isn't the same as a deep tub, warm water and candles  :wub: . I hate being indoors now and like to be out and about, when I'm up to driving there are some lovely drives in the countryside, and I take some elderly ladies for their doctor and hospital appointments which makes me feel useful again and I love their company. They are grateful for the lifts and we go for coffee too. I usually suffer after and can be wiped out for days but it is much better than being housebound, isolation is a killer! When I am not up to driving I go to the bistro across the street and just sit awhile watching people.  I love people watching it is fascinating. I would encourage everyone to go outside and watch some people, animals, birds or just sit and feel what is going on. I live just off the high street in a quiet little lane that is quite secluded so have peace and quiet but just yards away have interesting things to see, and a mile away is the country.  If I looked at the negatives it would be depressing, I cant see anything from my windows except other windows, can't see the sun or any trees but if I open a window can hear the birds singing and I love to hear birdsong. The aparment is very old and draughty. It was built in 1735 and has rotting windows and ancient heaters that are innefficient but has lovely oak beams and wonky floors which are quirky and so me. At the back I have a balcony that overlooks a car park but I have lots of pots to plant up so it will become my little oasis. I feel rotten a lot of the time but also have some really good days, and go out. I have to stop every few yards and sit on a bench or in a cafe for a cuppa, because my legs are wobbly and my back is not good but I do it anyway because it is better than sitting at home just focussing on the pain and negatives. 

 

I looked in my diary and it said that I was changing the toilet seat on 2nd Dec. That thing would not budge! It was Feb 12 before I finally screwed the new one in place. Every day I had to do a few cuts with a hack saw to get the fittings off, they were so badly corroded. Years ago it would have taken me an hour but now, just a few strokes back and forth when I went to the loo was the most I could muster  . But I DID ITand now have a lovely shiny loo seat to show off. 

I had offers of help from people who would have taken 10 minutes but I am a DIY kind of supergran  :ph34r:  :D . 

 

I am at my daughters now and its time for me to sink into that huge tub.   :wub:

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

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Hi MammaP. So happy to see your post.

I am not a medical professional. My comments and posts are based on personal experiences. Please consult appropriate medical professionals for advice. 

I was started on psych drugs back in the late 80's. You name it. I probably was on it. Tapered off final cocktail 2013-2019. For Hashimotos and high blood pressure I take Levothyroxine. Liothyronine. Spironolactone. Hydrochlorothiazide. Losartan. B12 hydroxy. Fish oil w/D3. Bee pollen. Magnesium Glycinate.

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Hi MammaP. Thinking of you today. Hope you had a better day today. You are always in my thoughts MammaP. It will be be okay dear friend.

I am not a medical professional. My comments and posts are based on personal experiences. Please consult appropriate medical professionals for advice. 

I was started on psych drugs back in the late 80's. You name it. I probably was on it. Tapered off final cocktail 2013-2019. For Hashimotos and high blood pressure I take Levothyroxine. Liothyronine. Spironolactone. Hydrochlorothiazide. Losartan. B12 hydroxy. Fish oil w/D3. Bee pollen. Magnesium Glycinate.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hello Marsha, thank you for stopping by. I think of you often and will catch up on your threads, I hope you are doing as well as can be.  It's been stressful and tiring but staying positive. Well, some of the time! There was a wave when I was considering going to the doctor for a 'diagnosis', fibromyalgia or cfs or even both. Feeling so tired and quickly exhausted but wanting to do things. For years I had no inclination to do anything at all and just getting a shower was too much effort. There was no motivation whatsoever and all the docs said was that it was depression and part of my 'bi-polar'.  Now I WANT to do things, go places and fix up my flat, plant up my pots and make my balcony beautiful but don't have any energy left after the things I do get on with. I had my little grandsons on Sunday and they were a delight, I drove them home Monday, drove back Tuesday and yesterday took a friend to the hospital. Only an hours drive each day but today I am wiped out and can't do anything.

 

This is the way things are and being away from here is not good! Coming back here reminded me that this is a result of 23 years of drugs and operations, and there is no point going to the doctor! I can't believe now that I was even considering it, I know what they would say!!  I am healing and when this awful tramadol is gone things will be much better.  I have to set reasonable goals, and not expect too much from myself. I have to remember too that I'm getting older! I have to keep focussing on what I am achieving because thinking about what I can't do just makes me sad, mad and frustrated. I can do more than I could when I started tapering drugs. Before psychiatry I was always one who would have a go at anything and if there was something needed done I would go to the library and get a book, then do it myself. Plumbing, rewiring, decorating I did the lot, now it took 9 weeks to change a toilet seat, but I smile when I look at it because I DID IT, that just made me laugh as I typed it, all it takes to make me smile is a toilet seat.  :lol:  The stupid thing is that it was doing all those things that helped them give me the bipolar label. If I was a man it would have been ok but women weren't supposed to do plumbing, and I was very careful to get a real plumber or electrician friend to check out my work. They were very impressed! 

 

I am now down to 32 mg of tramadol,its going the right way but slowly. Each drop is tiny, and when I log it in my sig it is 1mg at a time but that is acieved by 3 tiny drops, I only record when the total is 1mg. I need to buy more small syringes now its getting lower, or make up a weaker solution. If I do that I will probably forget and get confused. My memory is getting worse and almost back to where it was when I started tapering effexor 5 years ago! I'm hoping it will improve again when the tramadol gets lower. Or maybe its just lack of sleep and sunshine, I'm always worse in winter. I have my light box beside my bed and use it every day but always start to flag by January and sometimes go abroad for some sun to get me through the last leg of winter. This year my daughter has been waiting for major surgery so didn't want to go away in case she was called for the op.  She was called in for surgery tomorrow, but it has been changed to March so could have gone away after all! I'll be going to Scotland to be with her and her family, looking forward to seeing them all and hope her op goes well, she's been ill for a long time and is skin and bone :(

 

I have loads to catch up on here, it's good to be back. The internet is still a bit iffy and goes off but not for long these days.  :)

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • Moderator Emeritus

Another update.  I am feeling much better the last few days, not sure why, a nice window maybe, hopefully it will last a while. I have changed a couple of things, one is that I have stopped walking so far. I have been walking to visit a friend and going home was hard work, I often had to stop at the cafe before attempting the last leg then crashing on the sofa. I thought walking would be good for me and I actually enjoy it, even when it is raining. I also walked to the supermarket for groceries with my little trolley. Again had to stop on the way back. Both places were once a week and the furthest that I walk. I am exhausted the next day and can't do anything. It is so frustrating there is so much to do indoors but I am so whacked after going out the previous day that I can't get on with anything and the chores pile up.  I started to drive instead of walk so I'm not so exhausted, it's only around 200-300 yards away, no distance really but really does wear me out, I can barely move by the time I get home, my back is in spasm and my pelvis gets so tight my legs will barely move, I walk like a penguin!  :lol:

 

I still go for walks, but places where I can rest in stages and I am not in so much pain when I get back. Another thing is that I started to take curcumin, I had read good reviews so decided to try it. I feel more alert and not sure yet if it is responsible but it is good to feel my brain wake up a bit and I feel some motivation to get on with unpacking and sorting things, haven't done any more yet but feeling the urge to is good. I looked in the spare room and imagined where to put everything then shut the door, baby steps , can't do too much at once, looking is enough for now  ;)  :lol:

 

My internet is down, and that is a pain in the rear. I get fleeting flashes of blue on the router, pick up the lappy, and off it goes. Some days there isn't even a flicker and can't do anything. I get online in the cafe across the road so go there for a cuppa to check emails and stuff.  They are supposed to be fixing it by 5.30pm yesterday but still isn't fixed. I am going to visit my daughter who is having major surgery tomorrow and I am staying in a hotel at the airport ready for the early morning flight. There is free wifi and I am like a kid in a candy store.  I was at the hairdressers a few days ago and I got their wifi code on my tablet. They are just across the street from me and I discovered I can access their wifi in my bedroom sp tried it and it is so slow  that little circle thing goes round and round which soon quashed my excitement at piggy backing their wifi  :D

 

Sleep, I have an app that tracks sleep, I've had it for a couple of years but didn't get on with it. I decided to try it again and updated it.  Sleep has always been a huge problem for me and I have tried everything. I just put up with it and if I can get a couple of hours in a stretch that is great. 

The app showed that I have been averaging  5-8 'sleeps' that total an average of 3 hours with no distinctive pattern. I knew I was awake a lot but didn't realise I fell asleep and woke up 8 times with just 30 mins sleep at a time at most. I have no idea why I wake up so often, not a clue. There is very little noise outside, no neighbours, just the wine bar at weekends which can get a bit noisy but not all night.  I don't worry about it I have a comfy bed in a nice room and have learned to meditate on positive things.  I enjoy being in bed and if I fall asleep it's a bonus. 

 

Time to put down the lappy and settle down, time has flown!  Night everyone. 

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

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Hi MammaP. Good update. It is good to focus on positive upbuilding things isn't it. What is a trolly and a lappy? Laptop? Remember, "Don't give up."

I am not a medical professional. My comments and posts are based on personal experiences. Please consult appropriate medical professionals for advice. 

I was started on psych drugs back in the late 80's. You name it. I probably was on it. Tapered off final cocktail 2013-2019. For Hashimotos and high blood pressure I take Levothyroxine. Liothyronine. Spironolactone. Hydrochlorothiazide. Losartan. B12 hydroxy. Fish oil w/D3. Bee pollen. Magnesium Glycinate.

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always enjoy reading your interesting posts,MammaP.

 

your strength and determination through all this is an inspiration for sure.

 

hugs from ds

went on Prozac 1994-99,60mg.poopout ct  back on 2001-2002,prozac weekly 2002,not working,Effexor 75 mg.?2003-mar.2004 gaining weight 8wk. taper,wellbutrin 150 mg.mar. -may 2004 ctmedfree til july 2005 back to Prozac gaining weight again,back on wellbutrin jan.2006150-300 mg.bad constipation.also was taking aygestin(hormone)perimenopausal irregular bleeding.back on Prozac around sept,?2006,hysterectomy jan30.2007(adenomyosis)off&on Prozac til 2009,citalopram about 1 mo, April 2010 no effect,Effexor again may -mar, 2011.ct,Prozac aug,-dec, 2011 &sept-nov 2012,paroxetine oct,23 2013-may 4 2014 20 mgs.tapered 6 wks.-failed RI in Oct.2014-in protracted WD.started 10 mgs. Fluoxetine May 25 2021 .Stopped fluoxetine May 2022 at 5 mgs.

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  • 4 months later...
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I haven't updated for a while, nothing to report really, holding and carrying on. Waves and windows but nothing too bad. Until recently. 

There's a lot going on where I live and it can be hard to cope with but I like my place and where it is so will wait patiently until the issues have been resolved by the relevent authorities who are working on things.  I also had a weekend with a very old friend which triggered the PTSD. Then a family problem came up that needs addressing and will be could be a long hard road. 

 

I have chronic insomnia and the problems in the neighbourhood have meant that I have only been sleeping for 3-4 nights a week and with only 3 hours a night It's really been a struggle.  Without boring you all with the details I am exhausted.Last night I went to bed at 9pm hoping to get some sleep before the  commotion started. 

I went to sleep quite quickly and suddenly woke up at 11 feeling strange because it was quiet. It was weird, it is NEVER quiet on Fridays. Looked out of the window and all was silent, no one around. Went back to bed and woke again, and again. Still quiet but I felt out of it and confused. Went back to sleep and kept waking up like I had a massive hangover and couldn't wake up properly. When I got up at 9 I couldn't find my glasses. Felt drunk and lost my balance,also my face was tingling with pins and needles on one side Had coffee and breakfast but felt ill and went back to sleep till 11.then got up again.  Same again felt drunk and went back to bed again ad slept till 2pm. Slept on and off for 17 hours! About an hour ago I found an empty tramadol capsule on the coffee table. I think I might have been sleep walking and took some tramadol. It would explain the drunk feelings. I can't imagine making a liquid in my sleep but that is how I take it. I never, ever empty a capsule in the living room.  I feel much better now but nauseous and exhausted  so heading back to bed but wanted to record this. 

I don't think I have sleep walked for 40 years. Maybe I am wrong, but i still can't find my glasses and must have put them somewhere.

 

Guess where they are and the winner will get a gold star sticker :lol:

Edited by mammaP

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

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Best wishes, mammaP.

xo

Born 1945. 

1999 - First Effexor/Venlafaxine

2016 Withdrawal research. Effexor.  13Jul - 212.5mg;  6Aug - 200.0mg;  24Aug - 187.5mg;  13Sep - 175.0mg;  3Oct - 162.5mg;  26Oct - 150mg 

2017  9Jan - 150.00mg;  23Mar - 137.50mg;  24Apr - 125.00mg;  31May - 112.50mg holding;  3Sep - 100.00mg;  20Sep - 93.75mg;  20Oct - 87.5mg;  12Nov - 81.25mg;  13 Dec - 75.00mg

2018  18Jan - 69.1mg; 16Feb - 62.5mg; 16March - 57.5mg (-8%); 22Apr - 56.3mg(-2%); CRASHED - Updose 29May - 62.5mg; Updose - 1Jul - 75.0mg. Updose - 2Aug - 87.5mg. Updose - 27Aug - 100.0mg. Updose - 11Oct 112.5mg. Updose - 6Nov 125.00mg

2019 Updoses 19 Jan - 150.0mg. 1April - 162.5mg. 24 April - Feeling better - doing tasks, getting outside.  7 May - usual depression questionnaire gives "probably no depression" result.

Supps/Vits  Omega 3;  Chelated Magnesium;  Prebiotics/Probiotics, Vit D3. 

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Thanks Peng, hope you are doing ok.  I found my glasses in the drawer where cables and chargers are kept, it's like a box of black spaghetti. I must have thought they were wire and put them away, they do look like wire!  

 

Been a bad few days but today was a better day, not great but better.  :)

Edited by mammaP

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

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I am going go go a little into the PM conversation mammaP and I had about this subject,t (sleeping 17 hours, taking a med and having no recall of it, running into walls, tingling face, misplacing her eyeglasses, etc), with MammaP's permission.  This does not appear to be related with withdrawal, but it could be helpful to someone else down the line.

 

Upon further questioning, it first appeared that she could have been sleepwalking, as people have been known to do very elaborate work while sleepwalking, including making gourmet meals (and eating the whole thing, or just throwing it away!), so for this instance, I went step through step with her, and what struck me as not figgint in with sleepwalking was the tingling in her face, the length of time she felt "hungover", and I also asked her how she usually felt after taking a full dose of the medication she mixed and presumably took.  Sleeping 17 hours or feeling hungover is NOT part of how she normally feels after takin a full dose of Tramadol.  I then remembered with a TIA (transient Ischemic Attack, aka "mini stroke"- stroke -like symptoms that go away usually due to a loss of blood flow (AND OXYGEN) to a portion of the brain that goes away vs. stroke symptoms which do not go away).  I remembered that there can be a loss of memory with a TIA.  Upon further questioning, she admitted to remembering not being able to open the eye on the same side of her face that was tingling.  That set off alarm bells for me.  She does have some stressors that are not normal for her going on right now, and that in itself can cause sleepwalking, but with sleeping on and off for 17 hours when one is getting only a few hours a night for quite a while warned me tht this could be much more serious.  Upon asking about her BP, very recently it had been very nearly 200/90 (it was close to that within 2 points on each side).  If you know anything about BP, that should raise your eyebrows!  At the time we were chatting, her BP was very good.  Despite the fact that it was normal now, I still suggested that she go to the clinic as soon as possible for evaluation.  At worst, they will say she is fine, and she wasted a little time to make sure of that.  Her safety is important to me, so I am looking forward to the update.

 

To explain something, people having a stroke or TIA will generally have weakness on one side of the body, so the tingling on the same side of the face she could not open her eye on if the first things they warn us about, and that is why I was alarmed.  Add the high BP, another hallmark of a stroke, and we are entering dangerous territory.

 

This is all from memory and just my opinion, and MammaP understood that.

Be well MammaP!

Skeeter

Edited by Skeeter

Current meds: Lexapro 20mg, Valium 6.25mg
Current status: September 2018 forced to go down to 10mg of Valium/Diazepam from around 15mg, with the plan to have me totally of in 2 more months. I was not given a chance to give input at tapering at this speed, please go much, much slower. Luckily I found a new doctor, but was thrown off course by my rapid taper, as of 2/19 am down to 6.25mg, and am stable. Will update with dates of taper ASAP.
Read my history here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/12819-skeeters-journey/

   
I am NOT a doctor. My opinions are just that- MY opinions, based on my personal experiences and research, but your experience and reactions may differ greatly, we are all different! I maintain that a doctor educated in withdrawal is the best place to get info or to get the "go ahead" before changing your medications in any way!

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2 hours ago, Skeeter said:

Despite the fact that it was normal now, I still suggested that she go to the clinic as soon as possible for evaluation.  At worst, they will say she is fine, and she wasted a little time to make sure of that.  Her safety is important to me, so I am looking forward to the update.

 

Good call, Skeeter.  Her safety is very important to all of us.  As we all know, every one of those symptoms could very well be simple manifestations of withdrawal, however, the cluster of them together in something of an "event' makes it worth checking out.  

 

Keep us posted, MammaP.

 

Best,

 

Andy

Sertraline 50mg and Clonazapam .375mg from 2000 -- symptoms of dizziness Spring 2012

increased to .5 Clonazapam and 100mg Sertraline -- no improvement

Benzo microtaper from November 2012 to November 2014 (followed benzo sites "taper benzo first")

Started Sertraline taper in December 2014 cut by 25mg to 75mg; 62.5mg 1/1/15 and 50mg on 2/1/15

Held at 50mg through April 5 to use liquid 
Reduced dosage in 10% or less drops from 50mg to 25mg -- at single tablet of 25mg on 10/5/15

Transitioned to all liquid for accuracy while tapering -- Horrible insomnia -- back to 25mg liquid and held until October 1, 2016

10/16 -- 11/18 tapered very slowly to 10.6mg.  No real improvement and never really stable so updosed to 12.5mg (1/2 a pill) for convenience and long hold.

After 8+ months of holding with no noticeable improvement decided to add .4ml of liquid Prozac (about 1.5mg) to see if that improves the situation

Supplements, Magnesium, D3, Omega 3, curcumin, Valerian, 81mg Aspirin, L-Theanine, Vit. C,

 

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Thank you Skeeter and Andy, especially Skeeter who kicked my butt to the health centre! The doctor agreed that the cluster of symptoms together was worrying and the clincher was the facial weakness and droopy eyelid. She also thinks my falling could have been due to weakness in my leg on the same side as the facial weakness. I hadn't thought of that. I just felt very drunk! I feel 'normal' now, or withdrawal normal which makes it difficult to seperate symptoms.  

 

I've been referred to the TMI clinic and will be seen within a week. I've been arranging a support system so that if there is any sign of a stroke help will be here in minutes. The girls are going to call me every day and I am going to send messages too, just so they can hear me and see me typing They don't live nearby but friends live close and they can be here in minutes. I've registered with emergency services so I can text if I can't talk. They already have details so if my number appears they have my GPS at home. The text can specify which service. I have very low dose enteric coated aspirin. 

 

I blame everything on drugs and withdrawal, which is why I thought I must have taken tramadol and would probably have thought that even if I didn't find an empty capsule. 

 

The advertising campaign here says to look for 

Face,  one sided weakness

Arms, lift arms to see if one arm can't lift.

Smile, is it lopsided

Time, it is essential to get help in time

 

I didn't check any of these just noticed what I thought was pins and needles from how I was sleeping and waited 4 days to go to the doctor. :unsure:

Watch this space! 

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

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Love & best wishes, mammaP!

Born 1945. 

1999 - First Effexor/Venlafaxine

2016 Withdrawal research. Effexor.  13Jul - 212.5mg;  6Aug - 200.0mg;  24Aug - 187.5mg;  13Sep - 175.0mg;  3Oct - 162.5mg;  26Oct - 150mg 

2017  9Jan - 150.00mg;  23Mar - 137.50mg;  24Apr - 125.00mg;  31May - 112.50mg holding;  3Sep - 100.00mg;  20Sep - 93.75mg;  20Oct - 87.5mg;  12Nov - 81.25mg;  13 Dec - 75.00mg

2018  18Jan - 69.1mg; 16Feb - 62.5mg; 16March - 57.5mg (-8%); 22Apr - 56.3mg(-2%); CRASHED - Updose 29May - 62.5mg; Updose - 1Jul - 75.0mg. Updose - 2Aug - 87.5mg. Updose - 27Aug - 100.0mg. Updose - 11Oct 112.5mg. Updose - 6Nov 125.00mg

2019 Updoses 19 Jan - 150.0mg. 1April - 162.5mg. 24 April - Feeling better - doing tasks, getting outside.  7 May - usual depression questionnaire gives "probably no depression" result.

Supps/Vits  Omega 3;  Chelated Magnesium;  Prebiotics/Probiotics, Vit D3. 

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