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I have tinnitus and I have never found a way to diminish it, other than white noise.

 

A bite guard might help that TMJ. Quite a few of us (including me) have withdrawal-induced bruxism. This can cause all kinds of problems, including exacerbate tinnitus.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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I positively ate Richard Bach's books, and treated them as sort of metaphysical bibles. (Not the flying ones, the hugely popular ones like JLS, Illusions, Bridge Across Forever.) At a client's house during an overnight sit, he was mentioned in a magazine they had lying around that I idly flipped through, as being one of the 100 most influential people of our time. The little blurb said that he was recently injured in a plane crash and nearly died. So tonight I looked it up and find that his crash occurred the day AFTER he mailed a completed manuscript to the publisher of another flying story, about the plane he had just crashed. Spooky stuff. He was inspired, by his own story 'JLS', to complete a fourth and final part to JLS (that he had already penned some time ago but not sent to the publisher) during and as a part of his recovery.

 

I worshiped and idolized him for a long time. Passage of time, I gradually forgot about him until one day (after the internet happened) I looked him up. Huge disappointment! The woman he had written about, the fabulous love story, and he had divorced! He had a sort of placeholder website where he described what transpired along with an explanation something like "hey, this it what happens in real life" and kindly don't bother me. Death of an innocence or belief here and sad for me as I was probably in my 40's! But a growing up of sorts. Where has my life gone?

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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Just going to post this and try to avoid giving it a label such as 'weird' or ?

 

Couldn't sleep other night. Thought of something I wanted to listen to, to distract me. 'THE PROPHET By KAHLIL GIBRAN, A MUSICAL INTERPRETATION FEATURING RICHARD HARRIS'. No digital downloads. 2 used copies for sale on Amazon, $150 each. Noticed an ebay auct, starting bid $6.95. Advertised as Near Mint, no bids. Placed bid of $10. Got to sleep at 4am. Won auction Sat morn. Texted friend about it. In middle of texting, jumped up and looked in my stuff, I already HAVE it. Just assumed I didn't. Has scratches, maybe not suitable for conversion to digital via a USB turntable I still have to get, I have no turntable any more.

 

Asked mom: am I weird or just a garden variety human. She says the latter, I think so too.

 

Note to self: cleaning up my hoard may yield surprising results.

 

Anhedonia/dysthymia, in my playing out of experience, is a shifting state. Dynamic and changing.

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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Just saw your post, Alto, regarding TMJ. I have always been a bruxer (since child?) . And think the ear ringing might have always been there, can't remember when I first noticed it. And for all my medical knowledge, never put a name to it. It got really loud the other night, but I fell asleep anyway. What if our modern environment causes some sort of habituation to sound that our perceived hearing gets wrapped up in?

 

Bite blocks: The OTC ones, I have chewed thru in about 3 wks. A professional one costs bout $600. It doesn't always bother me. Haven't kept up on exercises. ?

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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For Alto if you see this. Furious Seasons blog is no longer a valid link. I think the guy might have moved on and seems to be involved with something to do with Mary Jane. Nothing for me to see there.

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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Right, I need to update those links.

 

Still, you may want to use a night guard, bruxism could be adding to your tinnitus, cutting down circulation. You might look into gentle jaw massage, too.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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I took some class in college about reason, deduction, ?. A concept I was trying to explain to myself about what actually works in recovering, treating symptoms, etc. and what to actually do/not do in any given situation, symptom. I remember a term flitting thru my mind and today, while I was trying to take a nap it came again. Sic ergo propter. Googling led me to the real term which is : ""Post hoc ergo propter hoc, Latin for "after this, therefore because of this", is a logical fallacy (of the questionable cause variety) that states "Since that event followed this one, that event must have been caused by this one."" (wikipedia). And variations therof, I think, all logical fallacies.

 

In managing symptoms with self care is where this comes in. Ooops! My mind just came to a dead stop. Had something to do with being susceptible to snake oil pitches. What works and why. Choosing a course and sticking to it. Rest, diet, reining in anxious thoughts/rumination, exercise (anything not related to my usual sitting in the chair web surfing), and the other stuff I refer to ATGS. Are they working? I don't feel particularly depressed, anhedonic, today and haven't for the past few days.

 

I was watching long island medium for a bit till it tired me. Led to me thinking about 'believing in your own hype'. I would be really embarrassed (I think) if I were a (well?)known psychic I happened to hear about in conjunction with the missing Ohio women. Don't know the whole story, not really interested in it, just what I thought I heard. I don't watch the news, Mom does.

 

Is critical thinking being taught in schools at ages where it could make a great deal of difference in quality of life?

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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Alto! I see your posts AFTER I post something....

 

That dead link was actually instructive for me, an example of where some people move after 'recovery'. I only actually clicked it because I liked the term "Furious Seasons". Searching out the name (Dawdy) led me to some curious places.

 

The TMJ is not bothersome at the moment (no pain, not always there) and the tinnitus is just there when I check for it or notice it. Either are just not actionable enough for me yet, I suppose. Tinnitus is a fascination to me but not an all pervasive one. Still rolling it around in my mind. I think it is a perception that is a 'thing' (has a medical definition). And it is not known what truly causes it? Love to remember what was going on when I first noticed it years ago.

 

I cannot make it out when I am driving. I can fall asleep and I know it's there. Not driving me nuts tho I can see where it may have the potential to do so if I let it.

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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Tinnitus/TMJ surfing:

 

http://healing.about.com/cs/conditions/a/tinnitus.htm (some of these, oh really???)

 

http://www.hear-it.org/Can-tinnitus-be-cured-

 

http://ttocs.hubpages.com/hub/Exercises-to-Help-Alleviate-TMJJaw-Pain (need personal testing)

 

http://www.nidcr.nih.gov/OralHealth/Topics/TMJ/TMJDisorders.htm

 

the last is where I found the most info. And why I don't think I am going to get a professional orthotic device.

 

Combining all my limited research led me to no definitive action cept maybe kicking my butt into doing the exercises if it gets painful.

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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Something else I want to remember along the lines of thinking my way into depression, letting my thoughts spiral downward.

 

I got a postcard in the mail yest. about my 'XX' High School Reunion this fall. One of the contact persons was a gal I remembered and she has a website. O M G. She made a living out of being a '!'. And she helped people in a certain type of 'place'! And look at what I did with my life, nothing!!!!!

 

Um, so what were the 2 businesses you started up WHILE YOU WERE ON HIGH DOSES OF THERAPEUTIC DRUGS and managed to make a living doing?????? Both very helpful to people, and you STILL have a lot of those clients?????

 

Just because I don't think I am not very good at either (but I must be, they still call me), does not mean I am a failure.

 

An evenings worth of reading about her and some objective thinking nipped that spiral right in its ugly bud. Take that you bad thoughts!!!!

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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Until I figure out a better way, I want to make notes on 'how did I get there'?

 

Jeanne Safer, PhD: from a post in Barbarannamated's intro. Requested ILL 5/12/13.

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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Although I have to admit that I am feeling better emotionally, today I felt a familiar feeling of panic and despair which had me wanting to just throw in the towel and give up. I feel as though I have just awoke from a long sleep of my whole life and reality is right in my face. What have I been doing all these years????

 

Reality is this: I cannot live on my SS income in my present situation. My mother cannot live alone on hers either. Living together we manage but I still work, though at a much reduced level since the CT illness. I am 1 minute away from disaster.

 

So I got on the web, told Google my problem and came across this: no one else can live on SS either. Very depressing. Get a job? How does a depressed, panicky old woman even look for a job when she has never been able to keep one because of (insert behavioral/emotional problems here)?

 

Where's my (insert tool of life destruction here)? Nope, not the answer.

 

So I asked Google to tell me how I could live rent free. Sheesh, so totally surprised at the answers! Couchsurfing.org and a really neat one, WWOOF (http://www.wwoofinternational.org) popped up.

 

I feel better.

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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Not really feeling ok and don't really know why, maybe a neuro emotion but it has some relation to today's events. So I logged on and visited the 'magnesium' thread and saw a line that described my feelings:

 

I mainly feel anxious with those depressive feelings in the background and lots of rumination about how will i cope.

 

Yep, that's it.

 

So could the neuro-emotions appearing today be a cumulative effect of recovery backsliding? Haven't really eaten very well last few days, not drinking all of my water, slacked off on the few supplements I have been taking (but just popped an omega 3), oh who knows?

 

I have a nagging sort of feeling, a desperation, about the future. Like I can't move forward with anything until I know what is going to happen and how I will cope. My house is a mess but not the extremes as seen on the hoarders shows. But it still has to be cleaned up and I want to move but can't. Tomorrow I will tackle it again, and just turn off the computer. I have been doing some research for some projects but I have been wasting time too. Body feels like swimming in molasses. Ugh. Lots of self doubt and constantly monitoring my behavior and what effect I think I'm having on others. Now here comes the tears of self pity and helplessness, oh sheesh. At least I am sleeping pretty well. This morning something startling happened. I have been noticing my tinnitus a lot lately , it ebbs and flows. Upon awakening my mind immediately reached for the sound in my ears and it was not there! When it finally came back some moments later, it has subtly changed.

 

Just not enough to base a life on, I should be working at a real job, now shouldn't I. I am going to die poor, and alone. And I have no one to blame but me. I have that really painful constriction in my throat, haven't felt that for years. This wave is so totally different from the one that led me to this board. And somehow I have got to find the strength to weather these waves or the rest of my life will truly be miserable and a waste.

 

Oh, wah.....

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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Just finished Jeanne Safer's book, "the Normal One". Lots of insights for me. Lots of stuff about my childhood I had not thought about in a long time. Now remembering and seeing where the person I have been and am now may have started. Insight is good, BUT knowing the answer WHY has not yet given me any clue how to proceed. Or maybe it has and it just is not time yet.

 

Very reluctant to read her book about how my Mother's death may liberate me.

 

Recalled my sister cutting her wrists one time and ended up in hosp. I feel ugly inside when I think of my growing up and my family. 5 or so years ago, as a result of something that happened after my father died (weird story), Mom and I were contacted by a sheriff from SD and told that my sister had either committed suicide or her husband murdered her. As far as I know, case may still be open. Big blank space there, her death. I had stopped all contact w/ her while I still lived there. She wrote a horrible letter to my Dad some time after I moved to this state and he never spoke to her again. My Mom still continued to send her birthday and xmas cards, she stopped writing to Mom. There is evidence that her life was miserable with the man she married, she never told any of us. She died in April, dad died in June, and we found out she died later that summer.

 

Friend told me I must read a book. Changed her life and that of her son. Gave me the book, read it all today. I've been there before: reincarnation, past life regression therapy. Brian Weiss, MD. Been exposed to lots of stuff, spent 16 yrs in California. Still ended up on AD's, feel like have wasted my life but I KNOW a lot. Now trying to grasp concept of the Descent Experience. Think I've entered one, what do I know? I feel bone dead effing tired of living, I'm burned out on insight, life, emotions, experiences, talking, thinking, everything. Not suicidal, either. Just tired.

 

Time to empty the cat boxes and take the dog out. Chop wood, carry water. I love/hate my life, what I have had of it so far. I have no clue if I have really been damaged by my childhood, if I am now a ticking time bomb as a result of psychoactive drugs and the CT experience. Garden variety neurotic or really in trouble here?

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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Ah, signed out then forgot something. People ALWAYS tell me I analyze things too much. Well, yeah I do. So what is going on? I have always been this way. I have a BSN. I was taught to analyze. I hear it ALL the time. Are they subtly trying to tell me to shut up already? Maybe I'll ask the lady who gave me the book why she told me that. When I hear that I always feel like shutting myself off from everyone and stop talking. I really get tired of hearing myself talk and I'm tired of hearing my own thoughts.

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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This is too weird for words. Healing is Sheila. GiaK is Monica. I make a flippant post about barefoot walking BEFORE finding out that Gia recommends it as a therapy. Now starting to read something from Sheila's blog about kundalini. Oh holy cr@p. Before I started on my current meds, I thought I was having a 'spiritual experience'. Later decided I was becoming psychotic, where all I had ever been was depressed (tho I had attempted many new age-y methods to bring about a 'spiritual awakening'). Got treated for depression with meds. Got off them. Always wondered what those weird states were about just before medication. I just bet I am going to discover that they most probably were some sort of spiritual awakening after all, according to some.

 

The rug has been pulled out from under me.

 

I think I should stay off the internet.

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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I'm dealing with mush brain, could not figure out where to post this so I'll put it here.

 

I came across the term 'forest bathing'. Something clicked in my mind about an odd experience I had a LONG time ago. In my early 12-step years, I visited my friend in Scotia, CA. Kept driving to the redwood forests. Felt like I was going completely crazy, couldn't figure out why, in what was supposed to be a 'healing place' (so I was told), they were having such a 'bad' effect on me. Finally asked her and she said something like the forest was cleaning me out. Oh! In a couple of days, the crazy feeling subsided and I felt 'different'. Realized that they are VERY quiet. I've always been attuned to birds, my Dad was a bird man. No bird or insect sounds! Well, some, but not like I was used to. IIRC it is because they are OLD places, no weeds and stuff popping up all of the time, stuff dropping seeds to feed the birds. Had the same odd effect years later in the Anza-Borrego desert. Startling absence of sound.

 

I have always craved silences like that. And pitch-black-can't-see-hand-in-front-of-face darkness. Used to go up to the mountains near San Diego to get this. Ear plugs and masks are not quite the same thing. And I love fires, building and tending them (campfires).

 

Earth, air, fire and water.

 

The grass in Florida here is mighty hostile, but a friend told me of a few places very close I can try.

 

Aren't I supposed to be SUFFERING from anhedonia, apathy, some awful 'descent experience'. Those are still there but the 'suffering' is weird and changing, fluid.

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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I feel really, really good.

 

Physical: Last time I did a dog groom, my back did not hurt! I am continuing to lose weight. I see it when I look at my wrists. And a look in the mirror shows I have lost nearly ALL of my back fat. I am sleeping well. I still have tinnitus.

 

Emotional: Ah, well, still having problems with anger, old ways of thinking are still there and at times it gets away from me. Mainly in the form of explosive outbursts to my mom. Plan to read at least a few pages of my CBT workbook daily and considering a few visits with a therapist.

 

Depression: Yes and no, my general mood is 'above the line'. I have to short circuit thinking about those issues that I cannot solve, such as uncertainty about the future. It has become much easier to 'change channels'.

 

Nutrition: Ooops! Falling down on that one and realized that it's a biggie for me!. Reminding myself to eat, drink water and take my few supplements.

 

The biggest change that I think has contributed to my feeling of well-being is my new windows were installed last Thursday. There is light and air circulating in my living space now and I love it!

 

I have also been doing a lot of reading on skeptic sites. Has loosened the grip on some of my (possibly non-productive) beliefs and I feel more clear-headed in my approach to life. I have also been researching some topics on PubMed.

 

My efforts to abort worry and rumination are becoming easier, pretty nearly second-nature.

 

Yeah, baby!

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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I have changed my sig to reflect what supplements and activity I am currently doing.

 

Had an odd morning, woke up feeling vaguely anxious. Not the knot in my stomach, more like non-specific unease. I had a shock yesterday when I realized I had missed one whole day of time. Bothered me greatly all evening. Added to that was some pounding in my head and palpitations this morning. The magnesium didn't really have an effect. Called off work, rescheduled it for tomorrow.

 

Felt better later in day (I knew I would). Talked to a friend and mentioned the 'missing day' and she reminded me we had a holiday last Mon. O for pete's sake, a very likely explanation for my lost hours. My body reaction was way out of line, though.

 

I have just noticed, in this last hour, that someone has turned the volume down on my tinnitus. I have to really strain to hear it now. How very weird.

 

I seem to be very sensitive to supplements. Try as I might to take a higher dose of the mag, I just can't do it. Adding in the small tab of B12 last few days seems to have done the trick regarding tiredness, though. My withdrawal and recovery period seems so very different from many who post here. I still feel really good for the most part and I am grateful for all the help I have found.

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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Sitting here reading a book, notice the tinnitus is back at normal volume. How odd that it disappeared temporarily. Oh, well. Just something to notice.....

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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  • Administrator

Well, it's good the tinnitus faded a little.

 

For a long time, I could take only 50mg magnesium at a time. Everybody is different, listen to your body.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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The tinnitus is really weird. I am so used to it being there that it was disconcerting to find it 'not there' when I searched for it yesterday. It is back today, slightly different, somehow. But at it's regular volume :)

 

Taking supplements is going to be problematic for me and I am at a loss to explain why (though it may have to do with the change in my 'biochemistry' after years of psychoactive drugs and a radical change in diet post AD's). I will just have to play it by ear and listen to my body. You are right about that, Alto.

 

I think I will keep the Mg citrate on an as-needed basis, the other stuff I seem to tolerate well. I can certainly look in the mirror and see how well I look and use how I feel as a guide when adjustments might have to be made.

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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Had a couple of upsets today and am reminded (by my internal feeling state all day) that things are different now that I am not on psychoactive drugs. I solved some problems (with my state's DMV and another with an online supplier), started the ball rolling on a project that will reduce my income slightly (it was a temp situation who's ending has now become final), and had a couple of personal interactions that were not all good but not all bad. I got agitated tho and raised my voice with a person, which left me shaking and upset (after I got home). The shaking upset is what got to me, the physical reaction was unexpected. Today is overcast and that adds to my gloomy mood. But this is the way life goes and the feelings will lift in time if I don't dwell on them.

 

I see my med doc on Wed (I asked if she could monitor me for a bit post AD's), this is 3 mos. since my last visit. I still do not want to go back on meds and I think she will agree.

 

It is really funny how the lack of sunshine affects my overall mood. We're in for a few days of rain and of course 6-1 was the start of hurricane season. Always in the back of my mind every summer.

 

Not really anything I can do today to SOLVE anything, guess I'll just have to keep on keeping on......

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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I always feel so much better in the evenings, especially after I have finished the rest of my water and the last of my supplements. And this is currently my favorite night of TV (I actually watch very little of it). 'Brain Games' followed by 'Going Ape'. I love the brain and behavior stuff. And NCIS reruns on U$A network, that show soothes me for some reason, must be because I like all the characters..... It's a bonus when it is on at bedtime, I can set the timer for 30" and fall asleep (bad habit I know, but I am sleeping so well lately!). A far cry from my angst earlier today....

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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I always feel so much better in the evenings, especially after I have finished the rest of my water and the last of my supplements. And this is currently my favorite night of TV (I actually watch very little of it). 'Brain Games' followed by 'Going Ape'. I love the brain and behavior stuff. And NCIS reruns on U$A network, that show soothes me for some reason, must be because I like all the characters..... It's a bonus when it is on at bedtime, I can set the timer for 30" and fall asleep (bad habit I know, but I am sleeping so well lately!). A far cry from my angst earlier today....

 

When I'm having withdrawal spells (after cuts) and having cortisol symptoms, I have always felt better in the evenings too. It's my favorite time of day. Sometimes I hate to go to bed knowing I'll feel worse again in the morning.

 

This is the case even when "morning" is 5 pm because of my graveyard shift and sleeping days. Reading on the Internet about circadian rhythms, it appears that cortisol is one of the quickest things to adjust to a change in the light/dark day schedule. (Unfortunately there are other things--mostly digestive/liver stuff--that don't switch back and forth so easily, and it shows. Sigh...)

Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. 

Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010.  Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea.

 

Feb 15 2010:  300 mg Neurontin  200 Lamictal   10 Celexa      0.65 Xanax   and 5 mg Ambien 

Feb 10 2014:   62 Lamictal    1.1 Celexa         0.135 Xanax    1.8 Valium

Feb 10 2015:   50 Lamictal      0.875 Celexa    0.11 Xanax      1.5 Valium

Feb 15 2016:   47.5 Lamictal   0.75 Celexa      0.0875 Xanax    1.42 Valium    

2/12/20             12                       0.045               0.007                   1 

May 2021            7                       0.01                  0.0037                1

Feb 2022            6                      0!!!                     0.00167               0.98                2.5 mg Ambien

Oct 2022       4.5 mg Lamictal    (off Celexa, off Xanax)   0.95 Valium    Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet 

 

I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion.

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Oh thank goodness I don't have that one on my plate, graveyard! When I worked in hospitals YEARS back, it was he11 when one place made us cycle through all 3 shifts every month. My best shift was always swing.  Even now, when I am naturally waking up at around 6:30a, I don't feel my day really has legs under it till about 10 a.m. Never have been one to jump out of bed and jump right into things. Need coffee, computer time, reading, playing sol (tho not very often lately), staring out the window, before I get into the day.

 

Thanks for the note, Rhi!

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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I have been exploring the new site layout and right after I logged out I happened to notice a grey circle with a light grey triangle in it at the bottom center of the page. A mouse roll-over lit it up, yayyyyy! My back to top button! Now the only thing I find that I really had become accustomed to is the TIME of a posting next to the date posted. Now, I know that when I set the filter (on the left page side) to anything other than it's default of 'posts I have not read', posts will show up, but I find myself clicking repeatedly on posts I have already read (if I don't mess up and click the poster's NAME). I am sure that there are infinite ways users orient themslves to the flow of the group. How weird that my 'flow' has been stopped just by the removal of one item of info (time of posting). Way too many mouse clicks for me to regain it so I will just have to find myself a new way or just quietly mourn the loss.

 

A really interesting thing I found this morn is what comes up when you click on 'see full list' at the bottom of the forum main page. You see all the guests and what topic they are currently viewing. A shock when I saw someone viewing my intro topic!

 

I have not found the graphic that shows the status of forums and topics yet. I had to do a screen cap and crop it into a little thumb on my desktop for quick reference:

 

 

 

Oh well cr@p, don't know how to insert an image into my post..... grrrr.

 

Edit: Oh now I know, I have to use the 'full editor' to get the 'attach files' box. The 'fast post' is not the full editor. And after a 2nd try at this I finally got the file attached.

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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I guess the 'forum legend' thing is not being used by this iteration of 'Community Forum Software by IP.Board'

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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My Avatar (I think it's called) is my cat Mac. (Bought the sunglasses and visor for a previous cat who I trained to walk on a leash. I had taken him to a St. Francis 'Blessing of the Animals' day at a local church and the local paper snapped a photo of him and printed it.) Haven't worked with Mac and the leash much, but he has been wearing a harness from since day one when I had to take him back after his 1st home didn't work out.

 

Training a cat to walk on a leash is a misnomer, kinda, because I start by attaching a leash and just follow them around. I also have a basket on the back of my bike to take them for rides. I am starting to feel well enough to get back to that stuff.

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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Early mornings are a great time for me to explore this site.  Found this in the Off Topic area:

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4002-the-cat-gif-guide-to-withdrawal/

 

LMAO!

 

Should be required reading to start every day!

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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I want to research this more when I get back from the med doc today:

 

http://www.mc.vanderbilt.edu/reporter/index.html?ID=3990

 

Study finds brain chemical cycles get ‘stuck’ in depression

BY: CLINTON COLMENARES

5/27/2005

 

It's the cycle thing that is of interest. Relates to my pre- post med and AD withdrawal symptoms.

 

The end of the article:

 

"The oscillation viewpoint also suggests that when talk therapists recognize those “stuck” periods of sadness, their therapeutic suggestions for changes in a patient's routine can steer them out of a rut.

 

Salomon is currently working on a replication study."

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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I want to research this more when I get back from the med doc today:

 

http://www.mc.vanderbilt.edu/reporter/index.html?ID=3990

 

Study finds brain chemical cycles get ‘stuck’ in depression

BY: CLINTON COLMENARES

5/27/2005

 

It's the cycle thing that is of interest. Relates to my pre- post med and AD withdrawal symptoms.

 

The end of the article:

 

"The oscillation viewpoint also suggests that when talk therapists recognize those “stuck” periods of sadness, their therapeutic suggestions for changes in a patient's routine can steer them out of a rut.

 

Salomon is currently working on a replication study."

Another name for this might be "change the channel." It has nothing to do with brain chemicals getting stuck. That's ridiculous.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Good thing I forgot to ask my doc what she meant when she told me something related to my post above. Duly noted, Alto. I'll keep my research private.

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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Another topic for me to research:

 

http://www.roylretreat.com/articles/b12.html

 

what interesting stuff comes up in searches. Have no idea yet if this person is froot loops but the false sense of energy thing is interesting. Got lots of questions for the GP when I see him.

 

Ah, posted to soon:

 

http://jacknorrisrd.com/safety-of-cyanide-in-cyanocobalamin/#comment-16998

 

oh, hey! Something on a SCIENCE site:

 

http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0308814601003132

 

See you later, I've got lots to read!

 

Another edit:  Forgot to tell you not to read anything into the links, this is my journal stuff to keep track of what I am interested in and when it occurs.....

Edited by cymbaltawithdrawal5600

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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Rats, the article I want to read above about further studies by Salomon was just published in Apr 2013 'Synapse'. Unless I pay I can only read the abstract. I have to be in the mood to read technical stuff, it takes a lot of concentration for comprehension. So this is a note for later.

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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Just a little simple search for B12 stuff and I find this:

 

http://www.living-foods.com/articles/b12article.html

 

this is way too complicated and technical but thought provoking. I don't like it when the info has no date of posting.

 

The B12 caps I bought are now in the trash....... definitely need further research. The cyano form of cobalamin is not the problem, its the vit itself and what it is needed for in the body. I had no idea that this 'B' was so complicated. I really have to have the GP check out my heart. Meds, diet, lifestyle and age are creeping up on me.....

What happened and how I arrived here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4243-cymbaltawithdrawal5600-introduction/#entry50878

 

July 2016 I have decided to leave my story here at SA unfinished. I have left my contact information in my profile for anyone who wishes to talk to me. I have a posting history spanning nearly 4 years and 3000+ posts all over the site.

 

Thank you to all who participated in my recovery. I'll miss talking to you but know that I'll be cheering you on from the sidelines, suffering and rejoicing with you in spirit, as you go on in your journey.

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