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MadMed: please help.. thx :)


MadMed

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update: thx Narcissus for the advice, I'll go through the links at times my head lets me lol & also thx to everyone's support.. As I said, I've made the choice to stop everything, & I'm sticking by it what ever happens.. in my long expiereance with this awful ratrace I personally think it's the only way to eventually get my life, son, carear.. everything back.. it's not possible to function correctly constantly on meds.

 

Ive even managed to start a new ecommerse enterprise project at the times I've been 'better', & other projects, including related to my personal mission to get the info out there about these terrible drugs & help others to avoid going down the same road.. the FB help page has enough now to get people thinking who join / read what I've put up.. I've also managed to get some great followers already ;)

 

It would be nice to share my real identity & who I was before, during & after this nightmare, but I have to stay anonymous for my professional plans.. it would risk ruining the untarnished image my professional side has right now..

 

my deppressive (between -4 to -6, see past posts), anxiety symptoms are worsening since stopping the 'meds', including massive spontaneous panic attacks, & a plethora of withdrawal symptoms. Must mention, even at times of extreme depressive attacks I pop one of my OM3 tabs & it rises a couple of points with in 20mins..

 

it's been 3 or 4 days now since I've stopped taking anything (see past posts)..

I was expecting getting worse before getting better.. it's unsupportable, but I just need some moments feeling less bad to remind me when I'm really bad that it will pass (this of course includes puncutal suicidal idioloigy).. anxiety in any form I can handle, it's even a trip lol but deppression is not something that can be accepted easily, even with mental strength, acceptance techniques ect

 

I'm following an eBay auction to buy a MindSpa at the moment.. hope I get it :)

Like I said before, starting the eye movement therapy next week.. also found a Reiki therapist that is covered by the health system here as he's also an acupunctureist which is covered in France.. that's just so great to find that.. will post my results.

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very small post of interest, not related to symptoms, it's important to think of other things.

Ive always been interested in ground braking science / space / quantum mechanics / extraterrestrial life ect

found this post, hope it's for real & finally opens the can of worms related to on earth extraterrestrial contact.

if its real could change so many things on earth, enjoy ;)

http://youtu.be/xKQuuFsidWY

 

oops, didn't realize it would put the image up, thought it would just post the link. hope that's ok.

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  • Administrator

If you'd like, you can start a topic about this and other topics in the Controversies forum.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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If you'd like, you can start a topic about this and other topics in the Controversies forum.

thx.. you mean for Aliens or SSRI vid ?
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  • Administrator

Preferably related to psychiatric treatment and its problems.

 

If you want to discuss aliens, the place for that would be the Off-Topic forum.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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round & round, up & down we go,

where it stops nobody knows..

 

.. yesterday was bareable, today the roller coster is dipping.

but as every that goes up must come down, the only way from down is back up ..

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'guday' everyone as the aussies put it :)

It's become clear to me that the Anafranil I stopped recently is still periodically having actions in my body.. I don't know how long that will continue.. what I do know is my brains healing process won't truly start until it's totally out of my body.. this is scary for me as the results each time it 'reacts' then stops is massive depression.. suicidal thoughts come with this 'yoyo" effect.. it's incredibly vicious.

 

If anyone thinks of advising me to go back to it & 'stabilizing' I must mention this is not an option as it was way to seratonine active, & I suffered seratonine syndrome type symptoms whilst on it.. my addictologist dr who's been following me for 3 weeks now confirmed this problem with Anafranil (though I've know this for years lol) & told me he never prescribes overly seratonine type antidepressants when it is necessary to prescribe an Antidepressant to some of his drug withdrawal patients. He prefers to prescribe mirtazipine for drug related withdrawal, but really prefers not to prescribe ADs at all.. good man ;)

 

If anyone reading my posts remembers, I mentioned being interested in a mind machine type gadget (light & sound) in a last post.. I won one on an eBay auction yesterday so I hope it's ok to list my findings about it later.. I would like to hear other people's expireances related to this type of technology.. did it help anyone ?

(one of my posts on another related product was removed due to inciting people to spend their money on possibly useless stuff. I appreciate the reasoning behind that decision as I myself have tested so many 'products' in the past in an act of being desperate)..

 

Appart from depressive symptoms, I'm also having spontaneous brain 'explosions' every few minutes sometimes every few seconds, like mini half second panic attacks.. I've noticed they can also be triggered when ever i move my eyes to extreme left or right.. not as difficult to deal with as DP but very hard to do anything constructive or talk to someone as it looks like I've got a mager tock :/ I suddenly jerk like a weirdo.. what a trip. I feel it's seratonine related, from stopping the Anafranil.. my hair has also started becoming brittle & falling out a bit since reducing/stopping Anaf.. this is a new, strange symptom to me.

 

ps (as if this post wasn't long enough already lol).. this 'other' product I mentioned that was removed is in sound format.. I'm trying to find it via P2P or torrent sources with out luck so far (I know the risks related to downloading stuff for free).. I use Vuze & uTorrent, but it seems finding free torrent links on Google is getting harder & harder.. anyone who can give me advise on this I would really appreciate it.. maybe by PM as publicly posting anything related to this form of file downloading might offend someone here..

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man, I can't take this.. between strong deppressive symptoms all the time (-3 to -7), the effects of the Anafranil that keeps coming back, then going, sending me to deppresive symptoms so low I start to loose contact with reality, constant states of anxiety + these explosions in my head all the time, crawling skin, electric shocks all over my body, back ache, head aches, nausea.. the list goes on & on.. I need some moments respite, but I'm not getting any..

 

I've got this sensation at the front of my head as well, like having a bag/bubble of air just behind the the scull.. it's been with me since the begining years ago, gets stronger when symptoms are stronger.. it's totally related to the brain damage these bl**dy drugs have done to my head, especially seratonine related products.. & I continue to loose weight even though I force myself to eat when ever I can, I'm down to 59kg for 1m79 tall.. it's as if the deppression symptoms are eating all the calories I take in.. I need help with some of these symptoms, especially deppression.. I hope the mind machine I won on eBay has some kind of effect..

 

I need to see a Reiki therapist to, but I'm afraid it's going to cost the kind of charges I can't afford..

€50 an hour !! do that just once a week, the math is simple, I already don't even have enough to eat properly..

.. & those black thoughts, I don't have the strength for all this..

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  • Moderator Emeritus

MM I am not sure what you're asking for. Your story is hard to follow and you don't appear to be asking for advice. 

 

Given your complicated history, I doubt that anyone here can tell you with much confidence what to do that would help; I doubt there's any doctor or expert anywhere who could fix things at this point. And it appears that you're well aware of your situation.

 

If it were me (and I do have a similar history, although not as many meds) I would probably try to hold on the 35 mg of Anafranil for a year or so, and see if I could stabilize and then taper down.  I just don't think cold turkey is ever a good idea.

 

But again, your situation is very complicated.

 

As far as what you're doing in your life, I don't think I know enough about your situation to hazard an opinion. I do think you're in a very unstable condition right now and it's probably not a great time to be taking on new projects that could be done more easily and more successfully at a better time.

Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. 

Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010.  Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea.

 

Feb 15 2010:  300 mg Neurontin  200 Lamictal   10 Celexa      0.65 Xanax   and 5 mg Ambien 

Feb 10 2014:   62 Lamictal    1.1 Celexa         0.135 Xanax    1.8 Valium

Feb 10 2015:   50 Lamictal      0.875 Celexa    0.11 Xanax      1.5 Valium

Feb 15 2016:   47.5 Lamictal   0.75 Celexa      0.0875 Xanax    1.42 Valium    

2/12/20             12                       0.045               0.007                   1 

May 2021            7                       0.01                  0.0037                1

Feb 2022            6                      0!!!                     0.00167               0.98                2.5 mg Ambien

Oct 2022       4.5 mg Lamictal    (off Celexa, off Xanax)   0.95 Valium    Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet 

 

I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion.

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thx Rhi.. your right, I do know very well my situation, and the subject in general.

I just would like what I've learned over the years to be beneficial to others instead of being waisted.

'stabilizing' for me has never worked..

 

I spent the 1st 10 years going in & out of hospital (even after hospitals) with that same word coming from multiple doctors (usually shrinks), before I had to accept that they could not help me.. and the danger for those like me is that when a psychiatrist sees symptoms their only reaction is more drugs.. worse, if the symptoms worsen when your given these drugs they give you more, lovely !!

I see by your signature you know exactly how it is.. I'm sorry you had to follow a similar journey.

 

general practitioners are a better choice than psychiatrist when it comes to this subject, but as you pointed out no practitioner knows how to really deal with the problem.

 

As for me, I had to cold turkey benzos (see last posts for reasons why).. that was in 2004.. it took literally years before my brain healed from that.. I still sometimes get little related 'hick ups', but it's very rare now & not at all difficult to deal with anymore. How ever I was convinced all my symptoms were related to benzos until the realization that all the other drugs, especial SSRIs & antidepressants were as much to blame..

 

now I have no choice but to travel the cold turkey band wagan one more time as I know it is the only way I will truly heal & have a chance to get my life back.. I don't advise others to follow this method, but for me it is the only option left :(

This is why I continue to test and research possible ways of helping the brain to reconstruct, neuro regenerate, like OM3, mind machines, Reiki, what ever, as throwing ANYTHING psychoactive at a brain like mine only worsens the problem & slows if not stops any healing from happening..

 

If there is anything I can do or advise to help you please just ask.

I'm not a doctor but I have traveled this road a long time..

I'm also hard headed so I won't stop learning, understanding something as it's only from knowledge & understanding that evolution & advancement can be made.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

 

 

'stabilizing' for me has never worked..

 

Can you tell us more about this, like when you've attempted to stabilize and what happened as a result?

 

Also, please consider adding an outline of your drug experience to your signature.  

3 Years 150 mgs Effexor

2 month taper down to zero

3 terrible weeks at zero

Back up to 75 mgs

2 months at 75

6 or so months back to regular dose of 150 - was able to restabilize fine.

3 month taper back to zero

1 HORRENDOUS week at zero

2 days back up to 37.5

3 days back up to 75

One week at 150 - unable to stabilize.

Back down to 75 mgs

At 75 mgs (half original dose) and suffering withdrawal symptoms since October 2012.

 

"It is a radical cure for all pessimism to become ill, to remain ill for a good while, and then grow well for a still longer period." - Nietzsche

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'stabilizing' for me has never worked..

Can you tell us more about this, like when you've attempted to stabilize and what happened as a result?

Also, please consider adding an outline of your drug experience to your signature.

I am trying to put together a signature, but I'm finding it difficult to minimize / organize in a format that stays informative, but not confusing.. maybe someone can help me with that.. as for stabilizing problems I've always had, its the same answer, but I will try my best to explain in due course :) .. the short reply is, every treatment I was given made me worse & in making me worse this lead to more treatments, getting worse + in certain cases (benzos & any antideppresants for example) I was having paradoxal reactions, which ment more drug changes, but since I was also badly addicted to benzos.. you see the problem.. hence in my case 'stabilization' = many drugs at the same time, which infact left me in a state of total zombie, unable to function at any level.
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Bad post time.. sorry, but I think it's important for those that follow.

I'm defiantly doing the the 'yoyo', some periods better than others.

 

I felt a down window (deppression) start yesterday around mid-day, that continued to dissend..

so, I took more OM3 tabs than usuall, always work for me at some level depending how bad the symptoms are.

It kept me at a level that was bareable, but when I go down it's a long way down, & at that level the effect of the OM3 is a couple of hours, so I have to take another every few hours to get through.

 

This morning is around -6, I'm crying like a baby + loosing contact a bit with reality, suicidal idioloigy is inevitable at that level.. After OM3 this improved a bit, maybe -4/5 instead of -6.. in my recent expierance the bad window can last a day to 2 days before coming back up.. Anafranil is still showing it's affects sometimes, now 7 days since 'cold turkey'.. I normally like cold meat lol :/

 

I have been informed of the way to approach my posts here, the 'goal'+approach on survivingantidepressants.org & the general policies to be followed here.. I will respect & follow this for all future posts & hope that my presence here will be allowed to continue, as my wish to aid others overtakes any punctual feelings i may have to pull out due to disciplinary type correspondence.. No warning points yet, so I appreciate that :)

 

No more direct reference to any particular products will be made, if you want to ask me specific related questions that may be considered an infringement of policy here, please PM me by email, I think I mentioned the address somewhere in last posts.. you can also contact me through my Facebook page listed in my details.. be excellent to each other.

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.. another morning in a distorted world for me (heavy deppression).

Saw my additologist doctor yesterday, he congratulated me on managing to stop the Annafranill.

I asked him if it would be possible to have a functional MRI, & was very surprised he said it could be organized.. I had one in 2004 when I was part of a protocol testing TMS (Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation) at the most famious psy hospital in France, called St Anne in Paris.. if I'd done then what I'm now having to do (stayed off antidepressants) I would quite likely be over the worsted by now.. I was going through cold turkey benzopiazapine withdrawal back then.

 

It's kind of interesting to constantly exist in a pararelle reality that is so close but totaly different to what 'normal' people take for granted. Everyone goes about their daily lives unaware of how fortunate they are.. and equally unaware of how easily that can change, how relient they are on their emotional state of mind to function & how close they are to another 'dimension' every second of every day.

They say ignorance is bliss.. People need to appreciate what they have as it is beautiful..

..the philosopher makes a guest appearance ;)

 

I spent yesterday constructing a Wordpress website/blog. I've been putting it off for months but was nessisary to advance in the 'mission' I set myself to get the info & help out there to those who may profit from it.. 3x OM3 tabs allowed me to focus a little clearer.

You can find the URL in my details.. the site is empty for now, but will slowly evolve & mentions my Facebook related page in the 'about' section. Facebook though a top social network tool can not be used in the same way as a site with menu pages ect :)

 

(I hope this isn't considered as 'promotion' :/ )

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  • 3 weeks later...

update:

due to recent events and personal discoveries I felt it was important to share these here.

- I had to stop the OM3s as they were stopping me from gaining weight, which has improved since stopping.

I was at 60kg for 1m79, and was eating like a pig to try to gain some weight.

- stopping OM3s has been / is like stopping an antidepressant, but with other biologically related kick back effects.

 

- I tried a short course of 'alpha lipoic acid' (ALP) .. Google 'alpha lipoic acid for depression' for some articles..

it had a fast effect on depressive symptoms, but caused me heightened anxiety and ultimately made me worse..

 

Side note: Stopping OM3s / ALP also seems to have the added negative result of messing up my immune system due to the multiple physical symptoms I now have which I didn't have before, at some times I have the impression I'm literally dieing since stopping these things. I hope they haven't triggered any bodily or organ disfunction... we're talking about substances here that influence all basis human biological functioning.

 

- I tried a certain sound related treatment, that induces a meditative state, that claims to boost endomophine, gaba, dhea, melatonin, seratonine, and lower cortisol levels and also claims to eradicate deppression, anxiety and addiction problems when used long term .. from personal expiereance I can confirm that it did induce a deep medatitif state and had a positive effect on me in some ways, but the effect of possibly boosting these brain chemicals actually also had a negative effect on me.. I may go back to it once my brain heals completely from psychatric drug related brain dysfunction..

 

- got a message chair that massages back, neck, head. this really helps me to relax and so much so that I can fall into a meditative state whist doing a session that when I emerge can sometimes have positive effects on my emotions.

 

- I'm having an MRI soon to confirm whether or not I've suffered front lobal brain damage from long term drug treatments. A functional MRI is also being organized, but will take longer.

 

- have managed to cut down my cigarette addiction (been a smoker 25 years) by using an electronic cig, using eliquid with nicotine inside. I've noticed many times that smoking a cig often worsens symptoms and have tried stopping before with out success..

 

Conclusions, which I suspected anyway..

- Trying to 'treat' symptoms with anything that works can be infact very dangerous, especially for those like me in a withrawal syndrome situation. The brain is so sensitive that anything you throw at it may not only slow down the healing process but the brain/body may also risk becomeing 'dependent' on what ever you take because the nervous system is weak to start with.

- When it concerns substances that are essential to correct biological functioning, this may be very dangerous indeed when you try to stop them.. this is a personal theory, some may disagree.

- The very fact that something works should infact be considered a warning...

 

I'm suffering much worse depressive / anxiety bouts since stopping the OM3s & ALP..

Regularly fighting with suicidal ideology when symptoms are particularly bad which is around 75% of the time, to the point, as I mentioned above, I get the impression sometimes I'm about to 'kick the bucket', so I actually had to go through the mental process a few days ago of accepting the possibility of dieing so as to not worsen anxiety and psychological thoughts created by that possibility.

 

Let me tell you, accepting death is a profound and liberating expiereance that has changed the way I look at everything and will stick with me for the rest of my life, how ever long that may be...

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  • Administrator

Perhaps you can take a much lower amount of omega-3 and avoid whatever adverse effects it had?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Not only was the Omega3 making me loose weight, but I was also starting to bleed easily..

And just 2 doses of the ALP I mentioned before, is still leaving very unpleasant side effects, like crawling skin, pins & needles, muscle cramps, head aches, weakness, metallic teeth sensations etc.. 2x 500mg tabs over 2 days did that, & that was days ago..

Like I've mentioned before, I am hyper sensitive to everything.

 

Unfortunatly the deppression, anxiety is so bad again, I'm throwing the towel in.. I've had enough, I'm done. My capacity to deal with this level of pain has reached it's limit.. everyone has a limit, & mine has been reached.

No one in France even knows about Tardive Dyphoria or possible brain damage caused by long term psychatric drug use, & even if they did there is no cure, and no way out, no substitute for Antideppresants, exept more antideppresants, be that chemical ones or by using alternative stuff, and even 'alternatives' seem to have bad effect on me.

 

Under normal circumstances anyone in as much pain as me would have been hospitalized weeks ago, but since I'm at home, seeing a doctor once a week, everything I ask him to do takes so long.. I wanted to have an MRI weeks ago, & every week he would say yes, but do nothing.. after forcing him today he finally gave me a prescrition for one, but even that will take ages, and as for a functional MRI, it will probably be xmas by the time i get one, anything I ask is the same.. I need help, now, everyday, suffering at this level is hell every second, let alone hours, days, weeks..

What am I supposed to do to make things happen, go on a stravation diet or something ? It seems it takes an extreme act to make people move, it's ridiculous..

 

If I am suffering brain damage, which I strongly suspect, I've done my research, it can be irreversible.. that's why I wanted an MRI to verify.. also, Tardive Dysphoria can also take a very, very long time to heal from, and by the very reason for it, is by definition untreatable by drugs.. I'm in a very dark place, with it seems no exit.. the only time I feel any some relief is when the anafranil punctually comes back up again, & it still does occationally a month after stopping.

 

I accepted the possibility of death a few days ago, so it doesn't scare me anymore, but the thought of living another day in deep depressive, chest crippling anxiety symptoms, mixed the multitude of psychical pains.. that scares me more..

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I'm sorry to everyone here to have brought my case to this site as most people here I get the impression, are following the 10% a month reduction, or come off & traveling the yoyo / windows ride.. I would be able to as well, if I had any windows, as it's the windows that give one the strength to get through the bad times.. my case falls into serious, long term, if not permanent suffering, that would take possibly years more to come back from.. benzos took me 7 years to get over after stopping, that's why I was put on ADs.. if ADs take that long as well to get over... just the thought of it markes me want to be sick.

 

It's now almost 01h in the morning here, I'm going to try to sleep.. that is my only escape at the moment..

Take care everyone, and as I always say.. be excellent to each other.

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If I may ask, how much benzo were you taking back then?

4 years aprox. on 150mgs.Effexor for situational major depression.No AD before.
Tapered 150-0mgs in 3 months.

Tapered Quetiapine,Xanax in the last 18 months.NO med of any kind anymore.
First 3 months off acute w/d
Protracted w/d ever since.
Symptoms:Anxiety,anhedonia,insomnia,tinnitus,PSSD

04/13/2014 Awful Relapse.Recovered fairly fast.

3 years and 4 months off.

waves and windows.Very much recovered.

November 2015,health issue.Setback.
 

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

MadMed,

 

Please put your drug history in your signature, like this:

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/893-please-put-your-withdrawal-history-in-your-signature/

 

It's very difficult to give advice without that and most of us staff don't have the time to read through your entire thread and figure it out every time you post.  Thanks.

Psychotropic drug history: Pristiq 50 mg. (mid-September 2010 through February 2011), Remeron (mid-September 2010 through January 2011), Lexapro 10 mg. (mid-February 2011 through mid-December 2011), Lorazepam (Ativan) 1 mg. as needed mid-September 2010 through early March 2012

"Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity." -Hanlon's Razor


Introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1588-introducing-jemima/

 

Success Story: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/6263-success-jemima-survives-lexapro-and-dr-dickhead-too/

Please note that I am not a medical professional and my advice is based on personal experience, reading, and anecdotal information posted by other sufferers.

 

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  • 4 years later...

Hello.. my name is Jason.. I’m in hospital. I posted here a few years ago when I was suffering withdrawals. I spent the past few years repeatedly trying to get off different medications without success.. have been hospitalized numerous times.. drugs of all catagories have been started & stopped at various times. I even went through ect 4 years ago. I’m back in hospital & things r going very badly. Last November I was on a cocktail at low dose of medications & was stable for 4 years. I was smoking to much cannabis which triggered a small depression. I came into hospital on 5mg Ability, 200mg Lamicdal & 150mg Mocobamide. The mocobamide & Ability was stopped no problem.. for a few days was ok on just Lamicdal. They put me on Mianserine 30.. was bad a week then ok. They upped to 60mg & everything has gone bad since. About 3 months ago I was still on Mianserine 60mg & Lamicdal.. was not depressed but was suffering anxiety. They stopped everything brutally. I went into heavy depression, anxiety & agitation. They put me on Seraquel 100mg & Annafranil 75mg. I got much worse. They continued  both for some time & upped the Annafranil to 15mg.. but after 3 weeks I stopped the Seroquel as it was giving me the impression of being dead in my head. Then suddenly the Annafranil kicked in & I became very agitated. I’m begged them to stop, which they did. I went through severe wds.. became delirious, depressed, panic attack, every psychotic symptom that exists. I have now been put in a locked ward. They put me on 45mg Mirtazapine which I’ve been on for about a month. They also added Buspar 25mg which I keep for about 10 days but I felt so bad on it I stopped about a week ago. Withdrawals of that r killing me, & the mirtazapine has turned me into a Zombie & is making me aggressive with horrendous side effects (weak muscles, back pains, confusion, cramps in muscles, joint pains ect) & is neighter helping my apparent depressive/vegetative state or my anxiety (powerful chest pains). I’m desperate as they refuse to change or lower the mirtazapine or make any other changes.. I literally feel like I’m dying. I don’t know what to ask for here except support & any advise possible. Please help, I don’t know what to do.

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An admin will respond soon be strong brother

 

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  14. corrent dose 0.25 devided in 4 parts 
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Thank you Miguel.. tonight feeling terrible.. my chest is pounding & I’m always feeling aggressive..  am seriously thinking about ect to help the symptoms & get off drugs. Saw a thread hear about someone who did that.

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  • Administrator

MadMed, have you been angry, aggressive, shouting, etc.?

 

If you can, you need to seem calm. Emotional outbursts and agitation confuse doctors, they can't hear what you're saying.

 

You need to calmly tell your doctors you are suffering withdrawal symptoms or some other adverse drug effect. You need someone to pay attention to this.

 

Your history is so complicated, I can't tell what drug might be a proper reinstatement. The error doctors make is that they make you take too high a dosage of drugs. They think that because your symptoms are big, the dosage has to be big, too. But less might be better, if the drug is hurting you.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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I talked to a dr today.. he was very unpleasant.. I tried to explain calmly that the mirtazapine is making me aggressive & that my original symptoms r still there & that I’m suffering wds as well.. he refused to make any changes & was quite confrontational.. I explained calmly that I would like to consider ect as an option.. he said if you want to do that to go to another clinic as they want to try the medication way 1st. The thing is I’ve been doing this since November (hell I’ve been doing this for years) with no improvement. I’m beginning to think I’m truly ill, by that I mean that I have permanent brain damage. Dr Breggin who u might have heard of in earlier posts did mention that some people suffer perminant damage. I must mention that at this point I have smuggled in some supplements that I ordered from Truehope.com

I don’t know if your aware of thier products.. take a look at the site, it’s interesting. I currently have their empowerplus & amino acid products in my bedroom but don’t know if I should risk taking any. Look up the ingredients & tell me what u think. Have just taken my 45mg mirtazapine which means I will fall asleep any moment & tomorrow another day of being an aggressive Zombie. Thank you so much for coming back to help me, I really appreciate it as I feel very alone against the drs here. I know thier intentions r good.

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  • Administrator

ECT will not fix withdrawal.

 

Dr. Breggin has contributed some valuable observations but is not nearly as versed in withdrawal syndrome as we are on this Web site.

 

Use search in the Symptoms forum to see our discussions about Truehope.

 

The best you can do is stop confronting them and get out of the hospital, where you can take charge of your situation.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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I don’t understand what is happening to me.. since being in a locked ward they have put me on 45mg of mirtazapine for 4 weeks but my depressive states are worse than when I came in.. I’ve been on it for over a month. Is it tollerance wds or because i stopped Buspar? I had to stop it as every time i took it I would get terrible heart pains with racking heart beat, then become massively sedated, then massively impulsive & a 3 hours later much more depressed with panic attacks & fits in the middle of the night. I feel like I’m dying here. I’ve got like a sensation of having a ball at the front of my head. I’m really scared.

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Just a short one tonight. I know I should be posting to help people but I’m alone here, so if anyone can chat I’d appreciate it. I’m spiraling down.

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Hi, MadMed this is favorite quote from the film Rocky, that i'm remembering every time when i'm down. I hope this will help you.

 

Quote

Rocky Balboa: Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It is a very mean and nasty place and it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't how hard you hit; it's about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward. How much you can take, and keep moving forward. 

 

9 Years of Deanxit use 1 pill (10mg) a day.

17.01.2018 stopped cold turkey.

Current: 20/20 pulset (pantoprazole), 1 motilium (domperidon)

 

Rocky Balboa: Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It is a very mean and nasty place and it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't how hard you hit; it's about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward. How much you can take, and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done. Now, if you know what you're worth, then go out and get what you're worth. But you gotta be willing to take the hit, and not pointing fingers saying you ain't where you are because of him, or her, or anybody. Cowards do that and that ain't you. You're better than that.

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Thank you.. I have a question, can taking high doses of mirtazapine actually make depression worse? When I came in this ward I was not good but now I’m worse 😔

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  • 1 month later...

Hello everyone.. I’m writing because I desperately need your support.. I’ve spent the last few months in hospital being tried on various drugs.. all made me worse + with horrendous side effects. They have cold turkied me from multiple meds 2 months ago & I feel litteraly like I’m dying.. I don’t know whether I’m suffering a permanent mental illness or permanent brain damage from years of meds or very protracted wds .. is there anyway to tell ?

 

My symptoms now are massive depression fluctuations all day from moment I wake to moment I sleep.. when I say fluctuations it’s literally every 30sec to a minute from bad to very bad.. bad chest, abdomen, lower abdomen pains, back ache, spinal pains running from base of head all the way down my spine, sensations like dead areas in my head, + a bar all around from one temple to the other, the sensation that the whole front of my brain has gone numb, massive anxiety, sevear waves of fatigue, cramps in my arms, legs & loss of sensation in my fingers (totally numb).. regular nausea & cold type symptoms.. often when I stand up feel like I’m going to faint & regular ringing in my ears. Also having bad mood changes & periodic confusion bouts with occasional migraines.. there are other symptoms but I’ll stop there.

 

The last drugs stopped were 45mg of mirtazapine, 40mg of Buspar.. I was on mirtazapine 7 or 8 weeks, Buspar 2 weeks.. other meds have also been started & stopped since November last year when I came into hospital.. I was stable for 4 years on 200mg Lamicdal & 5mg Abilify at that time, which they cold turkied me back in march. I can list the other drugs they tried if anyone wants to know them. ADs made me aggressive, Neuroleptics made me brain dead.. 

 

I really need your help & support as I’ve got no where else to go & no family or friends to turn too.. at the hospital they are talking about putting me into protective care but for some reason are refusing to allow me to try TMS to try and help a bit.. I have ordered a good rTDCS machine from New York (I live in France).. do you think it could help me through the worsed parts of wds ? Also thinking about taking small doses of Lithium Orotate like 5mg a day.. what are your thoughts ? I also have some empowerplus & some amino acids that I have not taken yet as I’m not sure if it’s a good idea.. I know you guys don’t have a good opinion of Truehope products.

 

Ive never managed to be off meds for longer than 6 months & I know some people can suffer protracted wds from meds for years.. 

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  • ChessieCat changed the title to MadMed: please help.. thx :)
  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi MadMed,

 

I've asked the other mods for their thoughts.

* NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA *

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED:  (6 year taper)      0mg Pristiq  on 13th November 2021

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021   LAST DOSE 0.0025mg

Post 0 updates start here    My tapering program     My Intro (goes to tapering graph)

 VIDEO:   Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management

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  • Administrator

MadMed, are you still in hospital?

 

It is possible your nervous system has been destabilized by going on and off drugs so many times. When this happens, you can become very sensitive to ordinary dosages of all kinds of drugs, and get bad reactions from psychiatric drugs.

 

You've been on and off so many drugs, it's impossible to tell what's caused your nervous system to be in an uproar. A very low dose of lamotrigine, even 5mg, might help settle it. Lamotrigine calms nervous system signalling.

 

Even if you get a good result from a little lamotrigine, it may take time for your nervous system to settle down, it's very jumpy. You will need to be patient and let it work.

 

I see you might have already experienced some good from lamotrigine

On 4/17/2018 at 2:55 AM, MadMed said:

for a few days was ok on just Lamicdal

 

Do you have any left? If not can you ask your doctor to prescribe lamotrigine 5mg? You might cut the tablet in half to start at 2.5mg. Let us know how you're doing.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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I’m seeing a dr today.. the problem I’ve found in this hospital is that 1st they like to give drugs.. a lot of drugs & at high doses.. they give Neuroleptics to everyone for everything including as sleeping tablets.. multipal med classes at the same time is normal here. 

 

They also have very minimal understanding of withdrawal protocol or protracted withdrawal senarios.. if your symptoms after stopping are still there after a month then you have a mental illness which = more drugs.

 

Ive tried asking for small doses of drugs before & they literally laugh in my face. I asked many times to go back on Lamicdal in the past few months & they refused. Will try to explain today but they keep saying, we are the experts not you & it’s not up to you to decide what to take.

 

What are your thoughts of using rTDCS or TMS to help symptoms? As I mentioned some of my symptoms would be classified as mood disturbances ie aggessive urges though I’m not sure if that’s because of depressive fluctuations or anxiety.. anyway, will try to pursuade the dr today to try 5mg or less of Lamicdal.. I must mention that I do sleep but have crippling fatigue during the day but can’t sleep during the day. Would other gaba drugs at low dose be a advisable like gabapeptine or prigabalin?

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  • Administrator

Most people here have not found any understanding about tapering or withdrawal from doctors.

 

Rather than argue with them, it might be best to change tactics. You might say you want to start lamotrigine again. You might request 5mg to start -- say you want to start low because you've had trouble with other drugs before and you're worried about the Stevens-Johnson allergic reaction. They'll know what that is.

 

Most likely, even if you request a prescription of 5mg lamotrigine, they will insist that 25mg is the lowest possible dose. Agree to take that to start, indicate you're willing to go higher. You will be able to make a liquid yourself from the 25mg tablet and take a low dose, 2.5mg to start. This topic explains how to do this:

 

Tips for tapering off Lamictal (lamotrigine)

 

Also see How do you talk to a doctor about tapering and withdrawal?
 
What should I expect from my doctor about withdrawal symptoms?

 

You're not likely to find any physicians who can solve your problem for you, you'll have to take responsibility for this yourself. This might require careful measuring and regular dosing -- do not skip any doses. Please let us know how you are doing.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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