Trying Posted September 18, 2013 Share Posted September 18, 2013 Hi, i,am new here and would,t like to share my story, In dec 2012 i got started on 20 mg of citalopram because i was having pannick attack ,s out of no were, only to found out later it was due to a nicotine poissing that has been going on for a year with out me knowing. Sept 2011 i stopped smoking and used nicotine tablets to help, but i just kept taking more and more, didn,t know they were so dangerous , i was taking about 36 tablets a day at 2 mg and sometimes more. So i was taking about 80 mg of nicotine daily for 14 months......found out later that 60 mg can kill you...... I didn,t know and it,s a over the counter product here...... Juli i got pannick attack,s confusion, terrible, in dec i collapsed and got started on the citalopram 20 mg, was really sick for 2 weeks, think now the nicotine and citalopram worked againsed each other? Was still taking them, one day the 2 mg tablets ran out, and i took the 1 mg tablets....... Began shaking, really bad like a junkie( what i was with out knowing) To make a long story short, ended up a the er and they started to ask was i was taking, still didn,t think of the tablet,s.....after asking futher i told them , o i,am taking those tablets and when they found out how mutch, they didn,t could,t not believe it..... Ended up in detox for 10 days, they gave me 100 mg of oxazepam , the next day 80 and then down to 40 mg a day, that,s when the intrusive thoughts started , but i was afraid to tell. Had really bad pannick attack,s on the oxazepam and strange thought,s but i just wanted to go home, after 10 days i went home, taking 4x 10 mg oxazepam and 20 mg citalopram , I was getting sicker and sicker at home, to the point were i was a zombie, became afraid of knive,s and manny other strange stuff..... Tryed to stop the oxazepam but 2 days later ended up with suïcide thought,s and pannick , so went back on, and started to taper, from 40 to 0 in 5 weeks, never got on a steady level, was terrible..... 6 weeks after that i taperd the citalopram 20 mg - 0 in 5 weeks. I,am so sorry for the long story, and my english , i,am from the netherlands , so it,s hard to explain. I,am now 5 months benzo free, and 8 weeks ssri free. I would,t like you,r thought,s about what happend, i still think that the oxazepam made my really sick, But i would,t like to know if it,s still possible to have wd after i stopped citalopram 8 weeks ago. I feel depressed, never was to begin with, became so bad on the oxazepam ....... Still verry vivid dreams, sexual disfuntion , some intrusive thought ,s , had pins and needles really bad after restless legs, after that really bad joint and muscle pain..... Bit nervous in the morning , blurred vision...... What are you,r thought,s....... Thank you! Sandra. Dec 2012 started citalopram 20 mg , could,t handle it, went back to 10mg. One week later 10 mg in the morning ,10 mg in the evening. 8 weeks later 20 mg at once, spend 2 days sleeping( sensitieve ?) Oxazepam jan- april 2013 40 mg a day, became so ill, taperd 40- 0 in 5 weeks, jumped at 5 mg. 18 juli taperd citalopram in 5 weeks 20-0 , jumped at 5 mg...... Today still suffering, want it to end! Link to comment
Trying Posted September 18, 2013 Author Share Posted September 18, 2013 Forgot to tell, still dealing with depersonalisation , verry stiff jaws.....and anger..... The anger come,s and leave,s, been tru the crying, and manny other stuff..... Just wanna be me again, and not that dark nasty person...... Hate it! X Sandra. Dec 2012 started citalopram 20 mg , could,t handle it, went back to 10mg. One week later 10 mg in the morning ,10 mg in the evening. 8 weeks later 20 mg at once, spend 2 days sleeping( sensitieve ?) Oxazepam jan- april 2013 40 mg a day, became so ill, taperd 40- 0 in 5 weeks, jumped at 5 mg. 18 juli taperd citalopram in 5 weeks 20-0 , jumped at 5 mg...... Today still suffering, want it to end! Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Petunia Posted September 18, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted September 18, 2013 Hi Sandra, Welcome to the forum and thank you for sharing your story. You have been through a very difficult ordeal, I'm so glad you survived. I'm sorry you are still feeling unwell, but its not surprising with everything you have been through. My opinion is yes, you are experiencing effects of withdrawal from medication, especially because of the combination of drugs and the speed which you came off them. Were you on Citalopram for 8 weeks or 7 months? If you have been medication free for 8 weeks now, it may be too late to reinstate a small amount, but it might be possible, someone else with more experience will be able to advise you and provide more help. Don't worry, you will get through this and get yourself back, it might take a little time, but there is a lot of good support here. More help will be along soon. Petu. I'm not a doctor. My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one. My Introduction Thread Full Drug and Withdrawal History Brief Summary Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects 2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010 Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal) May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins. Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens. Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days. April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close. VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from? VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made? VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes? VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects? VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes Link to comment
Trying Posted September 18, 2013 Author Share Posted September 18, 2013 Been on citalopram for 7 months and now of 8 weeks..... Doctor told me to try 5 mg again, but just afraid of messing things up again... Sandra. Dec 2012 started citalopram 20 mg , could,t handle it, went back to 10mg. One week later 10 mg in the morning ,10 mg in the evening. 8 weeks later 20 mg at once, spend 2 days sleeping( sensitieve ?) Oxazepam jan- april 2013 40 mg a day, became so ill, taperd 40- 0 in 5 weeks, jumped at 5 mg. 18 juli taperd citalopram in 5 weeks 20-0 , jumped at 5 mg...... Today still suffering, want it to end! Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Petunia Posted September 18, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted September 18, 2013 Just a couple more questions. What was the last dose of citalopram you were taking before you stopped, what did you taper down to before jumping off? In general, over the last 8 weeks, would you say your symptoms have improved, become worse or stayed the same? I'm not a doctor. My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one. My Introduction Thread Full Drug and Withdrawal History Brief Summary Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects 2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010 Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal) May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins. Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens. Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days. April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close. VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from? VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made? VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes? VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects? VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus tezza Posted September 18, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted September 18, 2013 Welcome, I'm sorry for all you've endured. If I were you, I might try only 2mg of Citalopram. You could be having WDs from both meds but it's best to try only one at the time and start very small. You could try 2mg for four days and see if that brings you any relief (or makes things worse). http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1644-tezza-risperdal-withdrawal/ Seroquel and Mirtazipine Link to comment
Trying Posted September 18, 2013 Author Share Posted September 18, 2013 Just a couple more questions. What was the last dose of citalopram you were taking before you stopped, what did you taper down to before jumping off? In general, over the last 8 weeks, would you say your symptoms have improved, become worse or stayed the same? Just a couple more questions. What was the last dose of citalopram you were taking before you stopped, what did you taper down to before jumping off? In general, over the last 8 weeks, would you say your symptoms have improved, become worse or stayed the same? The last dose of citalopram was 8 weeks ago and was 5 mg...... i was on 20 mg to begin with....i did 20-15 stayed on for 1 week then went down to 10 and stayed there for 2 weeks, tha 5 mg for 2 weeks and than jumped.....never felt good, but i don,t know if that,s from tapering the citalopram, or the oxazepam that i finished 6 before that. Dec 2012 started citalopram 20 mg , could,t handle it, went back to 10mg. One week later 10 mg in the morning ,10 mg in the evening. 8 weeks later 20 mg at once, spend 2 days sleeping( sensitieve ?) Oxazepam jan- april 2013 40 mg a day, became so ill, taperd 40- 0 in 5 weeks, jumped at 5 mg. 18 juli taperd citalopram in 5 weeks 20-0 , jumped at 5 mg...... Today still suffering, want it to end! Link to comment
Trying Posted September 18, 2013 Author Share Posted September 18, 2013 Just a couple more questions. What was the last dose of citalopram you were taking before you stopped, what did you taper down to before jumping off? In general, over the last 8 weeks, would you say your symptoms have improved, become worse or stayed the same? Just a couple more questions. What was the last dose of citalopram you were taking before you stopped, what did you taper down to before jumping off? In general, over the last 8 weeks, would you say your symptoms have improved, become worse or stayed the same? The last dose of citalopram was 8 weeks ago and was 5 mg...... i was on 20 mg to begin with....i did 20-15 stayed on for 1 week then went down to 10 and stayed there for 2 weeks, tha 5 mg for 2 weeks and than jumped.....never felt good, but i don,t know if that,s from tapering the citalopram, or the oxazepam that i finished 6 before that. Just a couple more questions. What was the last dose of citalopram you were taking before you stopped, what did you taper down to before jumping off? In general, over the last 8 weeks, would you say your symptoms have improved, become worse or stayed the same? Just a couple more questions. What was the last dose of citalopram you were taking before you stopped, what did you taper down to before jumping off? In general, over the last 8 weeks, would you say your symptoms have improved, become worse or stayed the same? The last dose of citalopram was 8 weeks ago and was 5 mg...... i was on 20 mg to begin with....i did 20-15 stayed on for 1 week then went down to 10 and stayed there for 2 weeks, tha 5 mg for 2 weeks and than jumped.....never felt good, but i don,t know if that,s from tapering the citalopram, or the oxazepam that i finished 6 before that. i became really bad on the oxazepam, a lot of thing have improved, but a lot of things are stil here, the anger, depression, feeling i,am living in a dream,anxiety.......sexual disfunticion( had that on the cita) verry vivid dreams..... Had really bad restless legs for 3 weeks, after that pins and needles in my arms and legs, that went away and the servere muscle ace and joint pain started.........feel like a freak today, like something really bad is gonna happen, could,t that be anxiety? thank you.... Dec 2012 started citalopram 20 mg , could,t handle it, went back to 10mg. One week later 10 mg in the morning ,10 mg in the evening. 8 weeks later 20 mg at once, spend 2 days sleeping( sensitieve ?) Oxazepam jan- april 2013 40 mg a day, became so ill, taperd 40- 0 in 5 weeks, jumped at 5 mg. 18 juli taperd citalopram in 5 weeks 20-0 , jumped at 5 mg...... Today still suffering, want it to end! Link to comment
Trying Posted September 18, 2013 Author Share Posted September 18, 2013 I,am sorry.... made a mess of the tread..... Dec 2012 started citalopram 20 mg , could,t handle it, went back to 10mg. One week later 10 mg in the morning ,10 mg in the evening. 8 weeks later 20 mg at once, spend 2 days sleeping( sensitieve ?) Oxazepam jan- april 2013 40 mg a day, became so ill, taperd 40- 0 in 5 weeks, jumped at 5 mg. 18 juli taperd citalopram in 5 weeks 20-0 , jumped at 5 mg...... Today still suffering, want it to end! Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted September 18, 2013 Administrator Share Posted September 18, 2013 Not to worry! Many people make mistakes posting to begin with. It seems to me your current symptoms may be a result of all the nervous system disruption with the various drugs you've taken, beginning with the overdose of nicotine. You may be experiencing citalopram withdrawal. As tezza suggested, a very small amount might help the symptoms. See http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/2023-tips-for-tapering-off-celexa-citalopram/ for tips about taking very small doses. Or, you might be experiencing benzo withdrawal and wish to reinstate a very small dosage of oxazepam or a similar benzo, stabilize, then very gradually go off that. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Rhiannon Posted September 18, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted September 18, 2013 Trying, you are doing fine with the thread. And with your English. I think it's very probable that you are experiencing withdrawal symptoms from citalopram and oxazepam, probably made worse by the nicotine poisoning that your body may still be recovering from. As Alto says, your central nervous system has been disrupted. You tapered off the medications quite fast. I would recommend a small reinstatement of citalopram to perhaps 2-5 mg. It may help. It probably won't make all of the symptoms go away at this point but it may help ease them somewhat. Don't expect immediate improvement. You may feel better and then worse again. That is normal in withdrawal and it is normal with a reinstatement. It will probably be some time before you feel completely well again. Please read through the Symptoms and Self-Care threads to get some ideas of things that may help you through this difficult time. Welcome to the forum. You will find good support here. Started on Prozac and Xanax in 1992 for PTSD after an assault. One drug led to more, the usual story. Got sicker and sicker, but believed I needed the drugs for my "underlying disease". Long story...lost everything. Life savings, home, physical and mental health, relationships, friendships, ability to work, everything. Amitryptiline, Prozac, bupropion, buspirone, flurazepam, diazepam, alprazolam, Paxil, citalopram, lamotrigine, gabapentin...probably more I've forgotten. Started multidrug taper in Feb 2010. Doing a very slow microtaper, down to low doses now and feeling SO much better, getting my old personality and my brain back! Able to work full time, have a full social life, and cope with stress better than ever. Not perfect, but much better. After 23 lost years. Big Pharma has a lot to answer for. And "medicine for profit" is just not a great idea. Feb 15 2010: 300 mg Neurontin 200 Lamictal 10 Celexa 0.65 Xanax and 5 mg Ambien Feb 10 2014: 62 Lamictal 1.1 Celexa 0.135 Xanax 1.8 Valium Feb 10 2015: 50 Lamictal 0.875 Celexa 0.11 Xanax 1.5 Valium Feb 15 2016: 47.5 Lamictal 0.75 Celexa 0.0875 Xanax 1.42 Valium 2/12/20 12 0.045 0.007 1 May 2021 7 0.01 0.0037 1 Feb 2022 6 0!!! 0.00167 0.98 2.5 mg Ambien Oct 2022 4.5 mg Lamictal (off Celexa, off Xanax) 0.95 Valium Ambien, 1/4 to 1/2 of a 5 mg tablet I'm not a doctor. Any advice I give is just my civilian opinion. Link to comment
Trying Posted September 19, 2013 Author Share Posted September 19, 2013 Thank you..... I wil never ever take another benzo again.....they made me so sick.... What are the chance,s of the citalopram and nicotine working againsed each other? I know with the amount of nicotine i took, my dopamine levels went tru the roof, how is that connected with serotonine ? Was i fighting one thing, while feeding the other? Is that why i got so sick the first 2 weeks on the citalopram? Took 20 mg at once..... Later i took 2 x 10 and that was better, was i sensitieve to the meds? 8 weeks later when i was of the nicotine , i took 20 mg in one time again, and had to spend two days in bed , same amount.... Is that strange? Had the same dose for 8 weeks, but slept for 2 days when i took 20 mg in once..... What are the chance,s of getting wors if i take the 5 mg? At 8 weeks of? Just a bit scared to try, ...... Is the sexual disfunction a benzo or ssri wd.....had it bad on the citalopram , after 8 weeks it not back, Or am i having a hard time because coming of both meds.....do they work on the same neuron,s ? Sorry for al my qustion ,s ...... Thank you! Dec 2012 started citalopram 20 mg , could,t handle it, went back to 10mg. One week later 10 mg in the morning ,10 mg in the evening. 8 weeks later 20 mg at once, spend 2 days sleeping( sensitieve ?) Oxazepam jan- april 2013 40 mg a day, became so ill, taperd 40- 0 in 5 weeks, jumped at 5 mg. 18 juli taperd citalopram in 5 weeks 20-0 , jumped at 5 mg...... Today still suffering, want it to end! Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Petunia Posted September 19, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted September 19, 2013 What are the chance,s of getting wors if i take the 5 mg? At 8 weeks of?Just a bit scared to try, ...... Its impossible to know because everyone is different, but as others have suggested, you could try 2mg. It may help to reduce symptoms slightly, but perhaps not right away. I know how scary it can be when we feel so unwell, but you need to read back through the suggestions here on your thread and then make your own decision about what to try, no one can give you a guarantee. The suggestions and advise given here is based on years of experience of what has generally worked for most people in similar situations. I tried to reinstate a small amount after over 2 years off and it didn't work. After 5 days I felt a lot worse and so I stopped, but you have only been off 8 weeks, so I would think there is a better chance of it helping, but the nervous system is an extremely complex system, and so little is understood about how it really works. If taking a small amount does in fact make you feel significantly worse, then you can stop taking it. Its natural to want answers about what happened, when things go wrong and life suddenly feels very much out of control. But Neurobiology is a young science, there are a lot of theories and opinions, but still not much is known for certain. You might find some of these topics from journals and scientific sources interesting: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/forum/16-from-journals-and-scientific-sources/ Please let us know what you decide to do and keep us updated so we can continue to help. I'm not a doctor. My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one. My Introduction Thread Full Drug and Withdrawal History Brief Summary Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects 2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010 Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal) May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins. Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens. Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days. April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close. VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from? VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made? VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes? VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects? VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted September 19, 2013 Administrator Share Posted September 19, 2013 The connection among all the drugs and symptoms is that they all act on the nervous system and disrupt its functioning. Allowing the nervous system to stabilize is the key to recovery. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
Trying Posted September 27, 2013 Author Share Posted September 27, 2013 The connection among all the drugs and symptoms is that they all act on the nervous system and disrupt its functioning. Allowing the nervous system to stabilize is the key to recovery.. I didn,t do it, not taking any meds again, i think i,am getting there, don,t wanna go a head on things, but i think i,am improving, stil bothering me is pssd....wil that go? Had it on the citalopram, and it,s still there, hope that is another WD, and it wil go.....Thank you for you,r kind replay,s, happy i didn,t go back on. Sandra. Dec 2012 started citalopram 20 mg , could,t handle it, went back to 10mg. One week later 10 mg in the morning ,10 mg in the evening. 8 weeks later 20 mg at once, spend 2 days sleeping( sensitieve ?) Oxazepam jan- april 2013 40 mg a day, became so ill, taperd 40- 0 in 5 weeks, jumped at 5 mg. 18 juli taperd citalopram in 5 weeks 20-0 , jumped at 5 mg...... Today still suffering, want it to end! Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Petunia Posted September 27, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted September 27, 2013 Thank you for posting an update Sandra. I'm happy to hear that you are improving. Most people do recover from pssd, so most likely you will too, just give it a bit more time. I'm not a doctor. My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one. My Introduction Thread Full Drug and Withdrawal History Brief Summary Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects 2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010 Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal) May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins. Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens. Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days. April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close. VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from? VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made? VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes? VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects? VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes Link to comment
Nikki Posted September 27, 2013 Share Posted September 27, 2013 Trying you have been through alot. The nicotine is very stimulating and could bring on alot of anxiety. Citalopram can also be stimulating. You were on relatively high doses and then dropped rapidly. And the benzo was in this mix as well, so yes your system was affected very strongly. At the height of my anxiety years back I became afraid of knives. I swear. The vivid dreams and restless leg and all of the other symptoms you are describing I have had and it was all from drug withdrawal. Personally I would go back on a small dose of the citalopram, maybe 5 mgs. You may need more, but you will have to make that determination by how you feel. Hopefully this will help you feel better. I take Citalopram so I can relate to what you are saying. Glad you found the site. It's so helpful to know you are not alone. Hang in there Intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1902-nikki-hi-my-rundown-with-ads/ Paxil 1997-2004 Crossed over to Lexapro Paxil not available at Pharmacies GSK halted deliveries Lexapro 40mgs Lexapro taper (2years) Imipramine Imipramine and Celexa Now Nefazadone/Imipramine 50mgs. each 45mgs. Serzone 50mgs. Imipramine Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted September 28, 2013 Administrator Share Posted September 28, 2013 My guess is that 5mg citalopram would be too much. I'd start with a very low dose, perhaps 1mg-2mg. Many people do well with fish oil and magnesium supplements, seehttp://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/36-king-of-supplements-omega-3-fatty-acids-fish-oil/http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1300-magnesium-natures-calcium-channel-blocker/ These help the muscle pains in particular. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
Trying Posted September 30, 2013 Author Share Posted September 30, 2013 Thanks Nikki and Alto...... I made the dissision not to go back on anything, i am slowly getting there, still have the nerve and muscle pain, a bit DR and DP ..... Vivid dreams , and verry tired , but sleep really well...... I,am afraid that going back on wil mess things up again, at least i can function now, not there yet, but it,s getting better. So i,am gonna try with out....... Thanks for your kind replays...... Xxx Sandra . Dec 2012 started citalopram 20 mg , could,t handle it, went back to 10mg. One week later 10 mg in the morning ,10 mg in the evening. 8 weeks later 20 mg at once, spend 2 days sleeping( sensitieve ?) Oxazepam jan- april 2013 40 mg a day, became so ill, taperd 40- 0 in 5 weeks, jumped at 5 mg. 18 juli taperd citalopram in 5 weeks 20-0 , jumped at 5 mg...... Today still suffering, want it to end! Link to comment
Trying Posted October 14, 2013 Author Share Posted October 14, 2013 It,s been 3 months now that i,am of citalopram.... Stil having problems, at first i didn,t know what to blame, the benzo,s or the citalopram.... Now i think it,s the citalopram, i think i had wd of both, but a lot of things i had went away, And it,s so hard to tell, if it is benzo or ssri related..... The benzo is 6 months now, the ssri 3 months...... Taperd citalopram 20 mg in 5 weeks, after being of 2 weeks things became really hard. I think i sufferd from both,and i would,t like to know if it,s normal for me to feel this way at 3 months off. Panic attacks out of no where Extreme muscle pain in my legs( when i sit) Pins and needles Confusion Vivid dreams Shaky in the morning Pssd Depression Sometime,s so tired The strange thing is that symptoms are not the same every day, things go away, and return again. Had extreme nerve tingeling, and numb feelings, in my legs , arms, back and face..... Today it,s only my legs that bothering me, feels strange...... Can someone please tell me this is still normal at 3 months, and that it wil go....... Thanks so much.... X Dec 2012 started citalopram 20 mg , could,t handle it, went back to 10mg. One week later 10 mg in the morning ,10 mg in the evening. 8 weeks later 20 mg at once, spend 2 days sleeping( sensitieve ?) Oxazepam jan- april 2013 40 mg a day, became so ill, taperd 40- 0 in 5 weeks, jumped at 5 mg. 18 juli taperd citalopram in 5 weeks 20-0 , jumped at 5 mg...... Today still suffering, want it to end! Link to comment
Trying Posted October 14, 2013 Author Share Posted October 14, 2013 Somebody please.... Is it normal that my lower legs hurt so much when i sit down? Kind of a electric feeling going up and down...can feel my nerves moving????? Don,t know how to explain...... Muscle pain, knee joints hurt...... So tired today, heavy eyes...... Thank you... X Dec 2012 started citalopram 20 mg , could,t handle it, went back to 10mg. One week later 10 mg in the morning ,10 mg in the evening. 8 weeks later 20 mg at once, spend 2 days sleeping( sensitieve ?) Oxazepam jan- april 2013 40 mg a day, became so ill, taperd 40- 0 in 5 weeks, jumped at 5 mg. 18 juli taperd citalopram in 5 weeks 20-0 , jumped at 5 mg...... Today still suffering, want it to end! Link to comment
Trying Posted October 14, 2013 Author Share Posted October 14, 2013 Is is normal to have panic one day, and depression the next? Now i,am just crying for no reason, is this a bad wave? I hate it and want it to stop, bit sick to my stomach....that,s back to...... It keeps repeting.......... Should i go back on? Wil it help after 12 weeks,,, Want to be happy again, Please? Sorry for the drama, feel like ..... Dec 2012 started citalopram 20 mg , could,t handle it, went back to 10mg. One week later 10 mg in the morning ,10 mg in the evening. 8 weeks later 20 mg at once, spend 2 days sleeping( sensitieve ?) Oxazepam jan- april 2013 40 mg a day, became so ill, taperd 40- 0 in 5 weeks, jumped at 5 mg. 18 juli taperd citalopram in 5 weeks 20-0 , jumped at 5 mg...... Today still suffering, want it to end! Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Petunia Posted October 14, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted October 14, 2013 Hi Sandra, I'm sorry you are going through such a difficult time, it sounds like it's frightening and confusing. But what you describe is quite typical of the way symptoms come and go. Have a look at this topic which explains more about the windows and waves pattern of recovery: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/82-the-windows-and-waves-pattern-of-recovery/ I experience what you describe, going through periods of intense anxiety, then it will switch to depression. Sometimes it will change throughout the day. Other times I will have high anxiety for a few days and then depression for a few days. I've also experienced all kinds of changing physical symptoms. Early on I had pains in my jaw like tooth ache, it would last for a few days and then stop. A couple of months later, it came back, not quite so bad and it only lasted for one day. I get all kinds of weird pains and body sensations in various body parts. Nothing seems to last longer than a few days though. Over the weekend I had pain in my left wrist and hand, it was quite bad. It lasted approximately 18 hours and then was suddenly gone. Try not to worry, it sounds like withdrawal symptoms, maybe other members will have some suggestions. Petu. I'm not a doctor. My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one. My Introduction Thread Full Drug and Withdrawal History Brief Summary Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects 2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010 Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal) May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins. Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens. Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days. April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close. VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from? VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made? VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes? VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects? VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes Link to comment
Trying Posted October 14, 2013 Author Share Posted October 14, 2013 Thank you Petu, Sometime,s i feel i can,t take it anymore........ Is there someone else with lower leg problems, an electric feeling al the time, buzzing feeling? So hard to explain, hope there is someone who knows what i mean..... Mental things are driving me nuts...... Just want to be me again...... X Dec 2012 started citalopram 20 mg , could,t handle it, went back to 10mg. One week later 10 mg in the morning ,10 mg in the evening. 8 weeks later 20 mg at once, spend 2 days sleeping( sensitieve ?) Oxazepam jan- april 2013 40 mg a day, became so ill, taperd 40- 0 in 5 weeks, jumped at 5 mg. 18 juli taperd citalopram in 5 weeks 20-0 , jumped at 5 mg...... Today still suffering, want it to end! Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Skyler Posted October 14, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted October 14, 2013 Is there someone else with lower leg problems, an electric feeling al the time, buzzing feeling?So hard to explain, hope there is someone who knows what i mean.....Mental things are driving me nuts...... A good deal of the Sx you describe, especially the problems in your lower legs, are the result of benzo WD. Lexi is having some of the same issues in her legs.. she has an intro thread, and is on the benzo sub forum. I would suggest you make a post there as well. Maybe you could be more specific as to what the mental things are. And welcome to our corner of the web, you are among good folk! As always, LISTEN TO YOUR BODY! A proud supporter of the 10% (or slower) rule. Requip - 3/16 ZERO Total time on 25 years. Lyrica: 8/15 ZERO Total time on 7 or 8 yrs.BENZO FREE 10/13 (started tapering 7/10) Total time on 25 years. Read my intro thread here, and check the about me section. "No matter how cynical you get, it's almost impossible to keep up." Lily Tomlin Link to comment
Trying Posted October 14, 2013 Author Share Posted October 14, 2013 I,am a member of benzo buddie,s and they told me i might be ssri related.... The wd are so a like, it,s difficault to know what it,s from..... I think that,s my problem, don,t know what med. to blame... The mental things are mostly panic, but not every day. Depersonalisatie ( don,t know in english) Depression Feeling of losing it Crying today Irritable Every day is different ..... And just don,t know to do..... Thanks for responding, but guess no one can help Just have to ride it out, i think , but it,s hard..... X Dec 2012 started citalopram 20 mg , could,t handle it, went back to 10mg. One week later 10 mg in the morning ,10 mg in the evening. 8 weeks later 20 mg at once, spend 2 days sleeping( sensitieve ?) Oxazepam jan- april 2013 40 mg a day, became so ill, taperd 40- 0 in 5 weeks, jumped at 5 mg. 18 juli taperd citalopram in 5 weeks 20-0 , jumped at 5 mg...... Today still suffering, want it to end! Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Skyler Posted October 14, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted October 14, 2013 I,am a member of benzo buddie,s and they told me i might be ssri related....The wd are so a like, it,s difficault to know what it,s from.....I think that,s my problem, don,t know what med. to blame...The mental things are mostly panic, but not every day.Depersonalisatie ( don,t know in english)DepressionFeeling of losing itCrying todayIrritableEvery day is different .....And just don,t know to do..... I think the bottom line is, it does not matter which you blame.. unfortunately, it pretty much is what it is now.. That said, I think you might find some comfort in finding other folks who have similar symptoms.. Lexi, to whom I gave you the link.. cted off two different ADs a few months back is now having a real go with her benzo taper.. because the ADs have made her so sensitive and some of her symptoms resemble yours. I've read a number of accounts of those in benzo WD who are having the leg issues have. We have a term for the mental symptoms you are having. Use the forum search function and enter neuroemotion. There is also a thread in the Symptoms and Self Care sub forum called neuroemotion. We do help by sharing though, and I'm glad you are checking us out. Every day will be different while you heal.. that's part of the bodies repairing the damage from your rapid tapers... over time things will get better. Edited 11:35 EDST As always, LISTEN TO YOUR BODY! A proud supporter of the 10% (or slower) rule. Requip - 3/16 ZERO Total time on 25 years. Lyrica: 8/15 ZERO Total time on 7 or 8 yrs.BENZO FREE 10/13 (started tapering 7/10) Total time on 25 years. Read my intro thread here, and check the about me section. "No matter how cynical you get, it's almost impossible to keep up." Lily Tomlin Link to comment
Trying Posted October 14, 2013 Author Share Posted October 14, 2013 Thank so much Skyler, So kind of you to replay, i wil look in to that! And i wil send lexi a Message.... It,s one hell of a ride!!! Thanks again..... X Dec 2012 started citalopram 20 mg , could,t handle it, went back to 10mg. One week later 10 mg in the morning ,10 mg in the evening. 8 weeks later 20 mg at once, spend 2 days sleeping( sensitieve ?) Oxazepam jan- april 2013 40 mg a day, became so ill, taperd 40- 0 in 5 weeks, jumped at 5 mg. 18 juli taperd citalopram in 5 weeks 20-0 , jumped at 5 mg...... Today still suffering, want it to end! Link to comment
Trying Posted October 14, 2013 Author Share Posted October 14, 2013 Did i taperd to fast? I was on 20 mg to begin with a could not handle it, so after 3 days went down to 10 A week later i did 2 time,s 10 10 in the morning and 10 in the evening. Did that for 8 weeks, than my doc told me to take the 20 in once. I did , and again i could not get out of bed. Does that mean i,am super sensitieve ??? I taperd 20 - 0 in 5 weeks.... Now of for 3 months....to late to reinstate? X Dec 2012 started citalopram 20 mg , could,t handle it, went back to 10mg. One week later 10 mg in the morning ,10 mg in the evening. 8 weeks later 20 mg at once, spend 2 days sleeping( sensitieve ?) Oxazepam jan- april 2013 40 mg a day, became so ill, taperd 40- 0 in 5 weeks, jumped at 5 mg. 18 juli taperd citalopram in 5 weeks 20-0 , jumped at 5 mg...... Today still suffering, want it to end! Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Skyler Posted October 14, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted October 14, 2013 Did i taperd to fast? Does that mean i,am super sensitieve ???I taperd 20 - 0 in 5 weeks....Now of for 3 months....to late to reinstate?X Your taper was very fast... that said, would you put how long you were on each med in your sig line, the dose, and when you came off? Put the benzo in.. that's just as problematic as AD WD. You are sensitive because of your rapid tapers.. I'm not sure about other variables, but the rapid tapering would cause the problems you have without additional 'help'. I think it's too late to reinstate either the AD or the benzo.. others may be able to offer more in this regard.. thing is, after 2 months it's hard to tell if taking a very small dose would help, or cause further issues. As always, LISTEN TO YOUR BODY! A proud supporter of the 10% (or slower) rule. Requip - 3/16 ZERO Total time on 25 years. Lyrica: 8/15 ZERO Total time on 7 or 8 yrs.BENZO FREE 10/13 (started tapering 7/10) Total time on 25 years. Read my intro thread here, and check the about me section. "No matter how cynical you get, it's almost impossible to keep up." Lily Tomlin Link to comment
Trying Posted October 16, 2013 Author Share Posted October 16, 2013 Is there anybody who knows if it,s to late to reinstate ???? I,am having a hard time and feeling terrible..... Most is mental... Moodswings, anger......total despere...... Would,t i be to late? Thank you! X Dec 2012 started citalopram 20 mg , could,t handle it, went back to 10mg. One week later 10 mg in the morning ,10 mg in the evening. 8 weeks later 20 mg at once, spend 2 days sleeping( sensitieve ?) Oxazepam jan- april 2013 40 mg a day, became so ill, taperd 40- 0 in 5 weeks, jumped at 5 mg. 18 juli taperd citalopram in 5 weeks 20-0 , jumped at 5 mg...... Today still suffering, want it to end! Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Skyler Posted October 16, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted October 16, 2013 Is there anybody who knows if it,s to late to reinstate ????I,am having a hard time and feeling terrible.....Most is mental...Moodswings, anger......total despere...... It's hard to tell which is the bigger player.. you tapered both oxazepam and citalopram in 5 weeks.. close together. Wow.. no wonder you are in WD. I'm sorry you did not find your way to this forum sooner. It is possible a small dose, 5 mgs, would help, BUT as you are this far out, it would be an iffy crap shoot. And it's highly unlikely reinstating would take care of all the benzo WD, and unfortunately, you may be having WD from both citalopram and oxazepam. You might want to open a thread on the benzo sub forum for more input. As always, LISTEN TO YOUR BODY! A proud supporter of the 10% (or slower) rule. Requip - 3/16 ZERO Total time on 25 years. Lyrica: 8/15 ZERO Total time on 7 or 8 yrs.BENZO FREE 10/13 (started tapering 7/10) Total time on 25 years. Read my intro thread here, and check the about me section. "No matter how cynical you get, it's almost impossible to keep up." Lily Tomlin Link to comment
Trying Posted October 16, 2013 Author Share Posted October 16, 2013 Thank you....it,s difficault to tell because they are so a like..... I think that the way it is now , i can handle it, but i,am scared that things are going to be even harder, That,s my big fear, that i wil go further down....... And that it wil last forever.... Is it normal to be still in withdrawal for 13 weeks? Things change al the time....is that healing??? I hope it is...... Thanks Skyler, for being there.... X Dec 2012 started citalopram 20 mg , could,t handle it, went back to 10mg. One week later 10 mg in the morning ,10 mg in the evening. 8 weeks later 20 mg at once, spend 2 days sleeping( sensitieve ?) Oxazepam jan- april 2013 40 mg a day, became so ill, taperd 40- 0 in 5 weeks, jumped at 5 mg. 18 juli taperd citalopram in 5 weeks 20-0 , jumped at 5 mg...... Today still suffering, want it to end! Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Skyler Posted October 16, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted October 16, 2013 And that it wil last forever....Is it normal to be still in withdrawal for 13 weeks?Things change al the time....is that healing??? Unfortunately it is all to common, as you will find as you explore this site. No, it will not last forever. Things change.. yes, I've experienced this. Symptoms shift, seem to involve one system, then another, sometimes separately, sometimes together. It's the way our neuroreceptors reset. Have you had any improvement thus far or have things been pretty much the same. As always, LISTEN TO YOUR BODY! A proud supporter of the 10% (or slower) rule. Requip - 3/16 ZERO Total time on 25 years. Lyrica: 8/15 ZERO Total time on 7 or 8 yrs.BENZO FREE 10/13 (started tapering 7/10) Total time on 25 years. Read my intro thread here, and check the about me section. "No matter how cynical you get, it's almost impossible to keep up." Lily Tomlin Link to comment
Trying Posted October 17, 2013 Author Share Posted October 17, 2013 Things have changed, but it,s hard to explain, because i have to do it in english, so i wil try the best i can. When on the oxazepam i had intrusive thought,s for the first time, after 2 months on i was afraid of knive,s , walking by water, looking in the mirror was unplesent and manny other strange things happend.... 3 months on and i was a zombie, didn,t feel anything and did,nt care, no feelings at al. Wanted to get of, it was the oxazepam that was making me sicker.... Tapering was not fun, the nasty thought,s stayed and i feld terrible, did,t trust my doc so did it on my own. In 5 weeks i was off, really don,t remember how i feld, but 6 weeks later i taperd the citalopram...... it,s been a merry go round of symptoms...... but i got hit hard at 2 weeks off, got the flu like symptoms, every morning i was sick, trowing up, dizzy, ...... After 5 weeks of i got restless legs, pretty bad, like i had to kick al the time, strange sensation going up and down my underlegs.... that became less and than the pins and needles started, became really bad in my arms and legs, along with some tingeling in my face. That became less, my legs started again, but differant, like nerve pain, like my nerves were twitching inside my lower legs, moving under my skin, stinging and my knee,s becan to hurt bad, muscle pain in my upper legs....tingeling down my spine..... Al verry strange feelings, still feel it on my calfs.... In the mean time i,f been angry, really angry, having intrusive thought,s , not happy at all, panic. Still have pssd, verry vivid dreams, intrusive thought,s, anger......stiff jaw, and every morning a song going over and over in my head. can be normal one hour, and a dark nasty person the next, feels like there is a kind of dr jekkel and mr hyde thing going on and i hate it. It,s a feeling inside me that is making me scared sometime,s, like i,am going crazy, that i wil do something, this morning i was standing in front of a window and thought,,,what if i put my head tru it....i feel the urge to do it, but i don,t...... A,m i going crazy, i hate it so much, it,s so not me......is this al really normal. Want it to end. x Dec 2012 started citalopram 20 mg , could,t handle it, went back to 10mg. One week later 10 mg in the morning ,10 mg in the evening. 8 weeks later 20 mg at once, spend 2 days sleeping( sensitieve ?) Oxazepam jan- april 2013 40 mg a day, became so ill, taperd 40- 0 in 5 weeks, jumped at 5 mg. 18 juli taperd citalopram in 5 weeks 20-0 , jumped at 5 mg...... Today still suffering, want it to end! Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Skyler Posted October 17, 2013 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted October 17, 2013 Hi Trying.. What you describe so ably are WD symptoms.. again, they will pass but it may be some months yet before you feel any real improvement. Unfortunately your nervous system has been destabilized by the quick tapers and needs time to reset the neuroreceptors. From your description, you were having an iatrongenic response to oxazepam, so your decision to quickly reduce the dose was understandable. Unfortunately we are sold psychotropics as a solution to our problems, when often they are a only gateway to the sorts of issues you find yourself with now. I'm sorry to hear you feel so miserable, scared and alone. Magnesium can help with the restless legs you are having. I had that symptom and would not have slept without it. The feelings 'inside' that are so distressing are called akathisia, and the feelings of being unreal are called depersonalization. You might want to use the search function and in the upper right hand of the screen.. just set it to forums. Skyler As always, LISTEN TO YOUR BODY! A proud supporter of the 10% (or slower) rule. Requip - 3/16 ZERO Total time on 25 years. Lyrica: 8/15 ZERO Total time on 7 or 8 yrs.BENZO FREE 10/13 (started tapering 7/10) Total time on 25 years. Read my intro thread here, and check the about me section. "No matter how cynical you get, it's almost impossible to keep up." Lily Tomlin Link to comment
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