Laineyk: back for another shot of antidepressant freedom

[Altostrata]

Mercury in your fillings is not the cause of withdrawal symptoms.

 

Let's see what happens at the lower dosage for a few days.

[laineyk]

what about B vitamins? specifically B-12..... can that cause anxiety

[Altostrata]

Yes, B12 can cause anxiety. Try only a little bit at a time.

[laineyk]

so I am going to start journaling my road to recovery

 

Today I went to 50mgs after taking 62.5 for 2 days

 

I will remain on this dose for 6-8 weeks and will see where I am at then

 

symptoms are as follows: 1. ANXIETY BAD

2. dizziness

3. headaches & neck tension

4. stomach problems

5. dry eye and blurred vision

6. head is in a fog

7. sensitive to noise & light

 

to think that a year ago I was working everyday, living life to the fullest, enjoying my grandson (have a new one coming in April) being a MOM...and completely anxiety free

 

today I can not work, am not living just watching others live, barely can be with my grandson because I feel so sick all the time, and so full of anxiety I can't think straight.

 

Please God rescue me out of this miry pit!!!!

[laineyk]

I was put on it for insomnia and mild anxiety....now my anxiety is totally consumed me...I want to believe that there is a way to do this without an SSRI

[lindamorellato]

Well my anxiety was getting to me so much. I saved for the last four months and scraped together the $450.00 and saw a hypnotherapist today. The session took about two and and a half hours. I have a cd of the session and I will listen to it 21 times over the next 30 days. I pray it helps me. It will be a lot of work but I need to do something while I am weaning off my meds. I believe in hypnosis and have wanted to do this for years. It will work if I work at it. I have to do something different now. Remember by taking psych meds we have changed our brains. It will take time to go back to before the meds. Even then i had anxiety. The difference is I feel i am learning tools to cope with my anxiety. All the best to you. Let's stick together it has to get better.

[Nikki]

LK I got off an ssri back in January 2009. It was Lexapro. It was a rough tapering process.

 

I was on Imipramine (a tricyclic) instead. I had anxiety and alot of it. I believe for myself that there was a Protracted WD from Lexapro coupled with job loss, alimony loss, etc.

 

I really don't know if I will ever be free from anxiety. I don't know if these meds set me up for more of what I bargained for.

 

I keep aiming/praying and trying to get myself to a better situation in life financially.

I own my home and do not have a mortgage. I am not in debt. After the job loss I went thru most of my savings. paid of credit cards, really don't use them. Medical bills nailed me big time. COBRA and out of pocket expenses.

 

I get anxiety over big bills. I belly-ache on here alot about that.

 

So in answer to your question it has not happened for me.

 

More people than ever before began taking anti-anxiety medication after the economy crashed in 08-09. We seem to live in an anxiety-producing environment these days.

[Altostrata]

Lainey, I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood. I suggested staying at 62.5mg and see how you do.

 

Two days at 62.5mg wasn't enough. It takes about 4 days for the decrease to register in your bloodstream. You just jumped from 75mg to 50mg, with a short hop to 62.5mg. I hope that wasn't too much of a drop.

 

Okay, I would stay at 50mg for at least 3-4 weeks.

[peggy]

anxiety is a withdrawal symptom - the aim is to taper slow enough that we avoid any withdrawal symptoms.

 

i have come off too fast in the past and have been slammed with that unrelenting gut churning anxiety. the only thing that relieved it was updosing and allowing it to stabilise - slow process, but fortunately for me i did stabilise.

[alexjuice]

Anxiety is crippling. The reason I first sought help was due to social anxiety, I was extremely withdrawn and avoidant in social situations. Unfortunately, my psychiatric treatment actually made my symptoms worse. Then I started a large benzo dose to manage the anxiety.

 

As I've reduced or stopped my medications the anxiety has come back. Sometimes it is entirely overwhelming. But I do think that today, as opposed to earlier in my life, I am better able to cope with it. Sometimes I just try to laugh and say "Withdra-wal!" to myself. Other times I think of how great this anxiety is as it's helping to regenerate my stress tolerance.

 

Often though, I forget all of this because the anxiety is too strong. Sometimes I am overcome with fear and I can't see through it.

 

I will no better as I decrease my benzo dose further and furhter. I imagine I'll always have to live with some measure of this anxiety. Accepting that is, possibly, one way to lessen its likelihood.

 

But, it's awful. Sometimes really, really bad anxiety isn't so bad because it gets to the point where I don't care if I wake up alive or not. Once I'm in that state it's hard to feel anxious about anything. It's peaceful in a way, like pure acceptance that life is over.

[strawberry17]

Totally what Peggy said (are we sisters?). I've had crippling anxiety/insomnia from too fast tapering (and c/t in the past)and still prone

[laineyk]

OH NO!!!!!! So the answer is "NO".....shall I start seeing a psycho;ogist? Because I can not function with all this anxiety. maybe I will need a benzo for life

[Skyler]

Anxiety is crippling. The reason I first sought help was due to social anxiety, I was extremely withdrawn and avoidant in social situations. Unfortunately, my psychiatric treatment actually made my symptoms worse. Then I started a large benzo dose to manage the anxiety.

 

Often though, I forget all of this because the anxiety is too strong. Sometimes I am overcome with fear and I can't see through it.

 

I will no better as I decrease my benzo dose further and furhter. I imagine I'll always have to live with some measure of this anxiety. Accepting that is, possibly, one way to lessen its likelihood.

Hi Alex,

 

Does klonopin still reduce your anxiety (have a clinical effect), or do you medicate to keep from going into WD. Has the anxiety, for which you were originally prescribed the benzos, remained pretty much the same?

 

Skyler

[laineyk]

I can say that when I 1st started on klonopin last June, I was taking .25mg bid and it was the best...but I was on zoloft and increasing my dose. since I came off of the zoloft & then have been trtying to RI it has not been effective. I continue to take it because I can not handle to W/D at this time.

 

I should say it helps a bit but nothing like before. I have HAD to increase to 1.25mgs a day to just have some bit of calm. I take .5 am, .25mg afternoong , .5 HS every 8 hours

 

back last summer I even got by with .25 once a day often...W/D from the zoloft has sucked the life out of me

[laineyk]

Ok sorry, I keep throwing myself all over the place but now I stay put but heres a question with all the jumping around I have been doing I still have had at least 50mgs in me for at least 22 days, does that count?

 

I have a feeling that theis RI is just not going to work. should have stayed at 150mgs back last summer when at least I was having some relief...even though I went from 50 to 150 which is a big jump and my hands shook like parkinsons daily. I still didnt feel this sick

 

I appreciate all the support I am getting here please do not grow tired of my whining

[SaveMooses]

Hang in there, Laney! What you are feeing is legitimate and real, not whining. You are asking good questions, it's just hard to focus on the answers right now for you. When I go back and re-read what I was going through and getting good advice, but it wasn't sinking in, that is part of your withdrawal symptoms cuz your brain is bouncing around everywhere! I sure wish you weren't going through this. I tell people I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy! Just remember to breathe, watch some comedy quietly.... ha ha... I couldn't handle noise or light... but some soft background music or white noise might help. I will continue to pray for some quick relief. That shaking is awful! Just know we are over here rootin' for you! You CAN get through this.

[Altostrata]

Lainey, stay on 50mg for at least 3-4 weeks.

 

No, your past dosage does not "count."

 

You cannot tell if this reinstatement is going to work or not. You have to see how your symptoms change.

 

Please do not let your anxiety persuade you to jump around any more in dosage.

[laineyk]

alto thank you, I will listen to you and not the stinking Drs anymore.....its because of them that I am where I am today.

[strawberry17]

laineyk I think zoloft is pretty evil, I struggled with it for some years, but a few years down the road and I am SO much better anxiety wise than I was back then,coming off it gave me crippling anxiety/akathisia, it CAN all get better, anxiety may not totally disappear out of our lives but it can get better with time.

[laineyk]

i Pray that you are right

[Altostrata]

Anxiety is a common withdrawal symptom. We recommend people taper carefully to avoid withdrawal symptoms like anxiety.

 

That is why we advocate a slow taper. You can minimize withdrawal symptoms like anxiety by tapering more gradually.

[laineyk]

I feel like total crap today. Just fell apart crying to my husband. Stomach was REALLY off all day and my head just feels so weird, cant even describe it. This is going to be rough as if it hasnt already

 

Im finding it so hard to do anything now. I feel like I am in slow motion always

 

I need real help

[laineyk]

today has been better then yesterday. not as anxious and stomach is much better, never took any magnesium or fish oil or vit D today...wonder if that has anything to do with it?

 

going to try and be brave & go out to Walmart!!!!! Whoooopie doo...right? but right now everything seems so hard.

[Altostrata]

Vitamin D might be activating for you.

 

I suggest adding the fish oil back in, but a little bit, for a few days and see if it has any effect on your symptoms.

[peggy]

i think its a good sign that you were a little less anxious today - anxiety sucks the life force out - i try so hard to let it be in the background and focus on doing something (anything) it can be very tiring, but i think it helps.

[laineyk]

Ok I will take the fish oil tomorrow along with the Vit C

[laineyk]

so today is day 8 of being back down to 50mgs zoloft. Yesterday I fell totally apart at aroung 4:30, my head hurt so bad & my stomach was so upset & I felt so dizzy....thought I wanted my huby to take me to the hospital...crying uncontrollably.

 

he was able to calm me down & eventually my stomach settled down too.

 

I will say that I think my anxiety is starting to decrease by a smidgen...not crawling out of my skin the last couple days, but still feel really off kilter and head feels like mush.

 

this has been the worst experiance of my life and I feel so guilty because I know someone who is battling Cancer stage 4...and she seems to be able still have a life, me...I am frozen in time...when I do leave the house I have to make sure Im not feeling to dizzy or I have to have my husband drive me.

 

still can not handle being around alot of ppl. I can go in and out of a store quickly because I dont have to talk to anyone, but to go to church or any thing that remotely would have me have to be socialble...FORGET IT!!!!!

 

Since Novemeber I have changed my doses 10 times!!!!! Thats right you heard me, 10 times

 

Nov 17 started Lexapro 5 mgs

 

Nov 24 10 mg lexapro

 

Nov 27 started back on 25mg zoloft

 

Dec 26 37mgs zoloft

 

Jan 2 50 mg zoloft

 

Jan 13 75 mg zoloft

 

,Jan 23 100 mgs zoloft only 2 days

 

Jan 25 50 mg zoloft

 

Feb 5 75 mgs zoloft

 

Feb 13 62.5 mgs zoloft

 

Feb 15 50 mgs zoloft which brings me to today

 

my CNS is so disturbed at this point that I can only pray that I will get well sooner or later. right now it doesnt even seem possible

[Meimeiquest]

Hugs! This is a time to just hold on...just staying alive is success. I went off Cymbalta c/t and didn't even know it (long story). On my worst days, my husband drove me around the countryside to get out of the house but not have to relate to anyone outside the family. It ended up becoming a family tradition, in a good way. I also had hot tea at 4 p.m. as my girls were coming home from school and I was terrified I couldn't handle them. Good luck! Meimeiquest

[laineyk]

another day down....started out kinda bad but I went out to Library and walmart (forced myself) after taking afternoon dose of klonopin I have been more relaxed

[Wingbatty]

Just keep counting them down. That is what it will take.

 

Your husband sounds like a really good guy, so supportive. My husband would be pulling his hair out & yelling, "take a higher dose! take a higher dose!"

 

Are you able to sleep at night? Are you doing anything for exercise? I am finding that exercise, especially walking, is saving me. I live in a very hot climate so I am sunburning and sweating while walking outside now in February but if it isn't a blizzard where you are, walking outside does so much for a body. I see a HUGE difference in my anxiety when I do this.

[laineyk]

today I took only .25mgs klonopin this morning and for whatever reason I have been calmer then when I take .5mgs

 

I am going to go ahead and take the other doses the same & hope I do ok

 

I usually take .5mg 6:00am .25mg 2:00pm .5mg 10:00pm

[laineyk]

today is day 16 on 50mg zoloft and I tried taking .25mg of the klonopin this morning instead of .5 mgs since the 5 does NOTHING at all...well its a crap shoot cuz I still feel like crap.

 

 

I know I have to give this more time but do any of you think that the klonopin might be making it worse?

 

I will not increase the dose , have already done that from 1mg a day to 1.25mgs a day...really feel no effect from it in the morning whatsoever...sometimes I think it makes me more anxious if that could be possible which the Dr says "NO"...its the zoloft and all the changes Ive made

 

 

this is the longest hardest time I have ever had with this and its so discouraging because I feel as if I will never be the same again

[Altostrata]

Benzos can have paradoxical effects, doing the opposite of calming.

 

You will have to give your reinstatement more time, Lainey. Be patient. Let your nervous system settle down.

 

Don't jump around in dosage of the benzo, either.

[Sparrow]

I've been where you're at right now with multiple meds and frequent dose changes. It's horrible and crazy-making and scary.

 

The most important thing I've learned -- and it took a long time for the lesson to really sink in -- is that often the best thing you can do is NOTHING. Hit the pause button, hold everything where it is right now. And then just stay there for as long as needed. That's the hard part. You feel terrible and are desperate for something, anything that will make it better. But the only thing that's going to help is time. Your nervous system needs time to catch its breath, so to speak.

 

Hang on, Lainey. This is a long, hard road with no shortcuts, but we're all slogging along it with you. Please take Alto's advice to heart and give this more time.

 

Hugs,

Sparrow

[laineyk]

Sparrow & alto and all, I can not express the gratitude I have for having pp who actually been there and know what its like.

 

I am staying put for now...dr will see me in 4 weeks and we will see whats up then. I guess your right Alto, that I need to just plug along with the klonopin and not mess with that either.

 

as you all can tell I am desperate for relief...and am so impatient. I have NEVER been one to sit around and not be busy constantly, so being unable to do things raises my anxiety even more.

 

I find it hard to watch tv, or talk and socialize with ANYONE...very sound sensitive. I can read a bit but cant keep my mind focused, I started knitting again that helps a bit...but even getting on the computer will become over stimulating to me at times...so I sit and stare at the walls

 

Im increasing my magnesium in hopes that it will help with this horrible akathasia....I have to be moving some part of my body constantly and its nerve wracking

 

today is day 17 on 50 mgs and no change whatsoever yet.

 

please oh please do not tire of my whining

[Altostrata]

You may be light-sensitive and want to cut down on that type of stimulation for a while. See http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/304-light-sensitive-try-blocking-out-blue-light/ and other topics on light sensitivity in the Symptoms and Self-care forum.