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Is it always going to be like this?


Nickie

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On 4/30/2018 at 9:13 AM, mariella said:

I think I read somewhere that the withdrawal symptoms can get worse over time. I don't remember where I read it. I just want to know why I'm getting worse. 

Thank you 

I think it can for some people.  I've been getting worse for a while now.

Lexapro 1/17 - 3/17 10 mg.  Switched to Elavil 3/27/17 10 mg

Upped to 20 mg June 5, 2017 3 days, back down to 10mg June 8

Up again to 20 mg June 12, 2017 4 days, back down to 10 June 16

9/17 dropped to 9.5 mg

11/17 dropped to 9.3mg

2/18/17 dropped to 8.8 mg

February 14/2018 Adverse reaction to zofran pill at clinic

10/7/19 8.48 mg

12/22/19 7.3 mg, 2/7/20 6.5 mg, 5/23/20 5.84 mg,  5/7/23 .70 mg

 

 

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It is not inevitable that people get worse. You might get worse for a lot of different reasons; for example, drinking alcohol or staying up all night playing games on the computer.

 

Questions like this don't make sense except in the context of your very specific histories. Please post questions in your Intro topics.

 

 

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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  • 1 month later...

In 11th month after ct all meds and now going through severe panic anxiety attack.. still no motivation.. this is hell

 

Zoloft . On 10-15 years started 100 mg last dose 200mg tapered to zero in one month.. psych dr advise Last dose:  50mg Zoloft in February 2017

5mg  Olanzipine - 1 -2 yrs last dose 5 mg in Jan 2017 told to stop within a weEk

 

NOTE:  had very bad withdrawal symptoms with discontinuation of Zoloft and Olanzipine.. very very seriously suicidal... 

 

450mg Effexor XR - started at 75mg a couple of years ago, increasing every few months until I got to 450mg

beginning in February to July 22 - 450, 300, 150, 75, 37.5 , 16.5 mg

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At the timeframe of yours it is not uncommon at all to have symptoms especially not when CT.

 

Things will get easier with time and symptoms fluctuate over time.  

-2012  January started Olanzapine 5mg, 7mg, 10mg, 25mg (2 months), 10mg (long time),5mg.

-2016 June 15th quit Olanzapine from 5mg to 0mg CT.

Other drugs; Imovane,Theralene, Propavane, Stesodil, which I took when I needed to. Quit them w/o trouble late 2015.

 

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15 hours ago, Offforgood said:

In 11th month after ct all meds and now going through severe panic anxiety attack.. still no motivation.. this is hell



People who have never taken any psych drugs, i.e. no anti-depressants, no benzos, no anti-psychotics, do suffer from panic and anxiety attacks.  And everyone in their life probably at some point feels they don't have motivation.    I'm not saying that your problems are not caused by the drugs at all, but there might also be some underlying emotional/cognitive (i.e. thinking) issues that are contributing.   If you haven't yet, you might want to look into some books on cognitive behavioural therapy, motivation, etc.  You might find them helpful. Or if you can afford it, a therapist/life coach can also be helpful.

Even if a large part of what you are feeling IS caused by the cold turkey, the techniques in the books could help you deal with the withdrawal symptoms and help you motivate yourself in spite of the withdrawal systems, so a win-win. 

200 Zoloft; 10 mg Zyprexa; 4 mg valium as of May 2021;  Valium taper: July 16: 3.5 valium; July 30: 3 mg (paused valium taper); Aug. 23: 2.5 mg
Zyprexa: July 26: 8.75 mg; Aug. 9: 7.5 mg; Aug. 30: 7.1 mg

-------
Dec 1, 2016. 10 mg zyprexa for 1.5 month. Started taper mid-Jan. 2017. Cut 1.25 mg every 2 weeks; smaller cuts 2.5 mg down. Stopped at .6 mg. May 7, 2017: zyprexa free. 
Zoloft: Dec1, 2016, 200 mg. Started taper: Jun12, 2017: 197.5 mg; Jun19,:195 mg; July 2:185mg; July 9,:180 mg; July16,: 175; July 23: 170; July 30: 165; Aug6: 160; Aug13: 155; Aug. 20: 150; Aug.27: 146 mg; Sept3: 145 mg; Sept10:143 mg; Sept17:140 mg....Nov5: 122 mg...Dec3:112.5 mg; Jan14, 2018: 95 mg...Jan28: 90 mg; Feb21:80 mg; Mar11: 75 mg; May2:70 mg; May15: 68 mg; May28: 65 mg; Jun9: 62 mg;Jun25: 60 mg:July22: 55 mg; Aug25: 45 mg. Aug28: 50 mg...Oct 28: 38 mg; Dec.4: 30 mg; Jan8,2019: 25mg; Feb6: 23.5 mg; Apr1:17.5mg; May1:1 mg; May 5: 18;  May 18:15mg; June 16:12.5mg; Sept 10:11 mg; Sept.16:10 mg; Oct. 1: 9mg; Nov. 27: 8mg; Dec.5: 7mg; Jan.1,2020, 6 mg; Feb1: 5 mg; May 1: 2.5 mg; Jn 1: 2 mg; Jy 1: 1.5 mg

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9 hours ago, Madeleine said:

If you haven't yet, you might want to look into some books on cognitive behavioural therapy, motivation, etc.  You might find them helpful. Or if you can afford it, a therapist/life coach can also be helpful.

Even if a large part of what you are feeling IS caused by the cold turkey, the techniques in the books could help you deal with the withdrawal symptoms and help you motivate yourself in spite of the withdrawal systems, so a win-win. 

 

CBT is great for normal anxiety and normal lack of motivation, but the problem with suggesting CBT for withdrawal symptoms is that beyond possibly helping with acceptance, it just doesn't work and in my experience can make things worse. Most therapists don't understand withdrawal and will assume the client is doing something wrong when the methods aren't working. CBT works great for preventing any secondary anxiety or unhelpful thinking about withdrawal and its symptoms, but its not going to reduce withdrawal anxiety, withdrawal anhedonia, or any of the sensations caused by a malfunctioning nervous system. When you are not getting any positive feelings from anything, when everything seems pointless, or frightening, because of withdrawal, there's nothing you can do except be patient, accepting and wait for more time to pass.

 

I spent 2 years trying to force myself to be more active, but all I managed to achieve was increase my stress levels and feelings of failure because I couldn't fix myself by behaving differently. I think the increased stress from trying to push myself probably increased the length of my recovery and caused secondary trauma, which I'm now having to work hard at to overcome.

 

If someone has underlying issues which they want to work on through therapy, its probably better to wait until they are over the worst of withdrawal before taking on more stress, unless the therapist is experienced with dealing with clients going through withdrawal.

 

We all have different experiences of symptoms, some taper properly, some taper too fast or go CT, some have milder symptoms and are able to function fairly well, pushing through when something is a little difficult, with no negative consequences. But others have extreme, life threatening experiences, with symptoms which are almost unbearable and impossible to tolerate, causing life to be reduced to nothing but a daily struggle to survive, for a time. At 11 months off I could hardly leave my room, so I couldn't have found a therapist, and I was unable to read books, watch TV, follow a conversation or even make a simple phone call. But with nothing more than the passing of time, most of my normal functioning has returned...and amazingly, my previous issues and anxieties have disappeared after surviving through the extreme ordeal of withdrawal and recovery. 

 

Thank you for the suggestions. The work of Dr. Claire Weekes can sometimes be helpful for those of us in withdrawal.

I'm not a doctor.  My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one.

My Introduction Thread

Full Drug and Withdrawal History

Brief Summary

Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects

2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010

Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal

DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms

Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal)

May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins.

Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes

Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine

Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D

June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens.

Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered

Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days.

April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close.

VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from?



VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made?



VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes?



VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects?

VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes

 

 

 

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  • ChessieCat changed the title to Is it always going to be like this?
  • 3 weeks later...

how are you now petunia?

Took prozac 40 mg for 20 years.

January 2017 started cutting down prozac by 12.5% a week. End of February 2017 completely off prozac and withdrawals began.

Currently taking Levothyroxine 75 mcg, Magnesium citrate 200mg,Sage leaf 50mg daily

Amlodipine: October 2017 , discontinued 26 Feb 2019; Candesartan:  26 Feb 2019, 4mg.

Discontinued magnesium citrate 200mg Apr 3rd 2019

Reinstated prozac:  14 Jan 2019, 1mg; 26 Jan, 1.5mg; 4 Feb, 2mg; 16 Feb, 2.5mg; 2 Mar, 3mg; 5 Mar, 2.5mg, 23 Mar, 3 mg; 6 Apr, 3.5mg, 14 Apr 4mg, 23 Apr 5mg, 10 Jul 8mg, 1 Dec 20mg, 1 Apr 2020 40mg 

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My therapist doesn't "get" WD, and actually told me off for attributing my symptoms to it.

 

She is also fed up with the peri-meno grievances I have.

 

So, I'm now into Week 5/12 of CBT.

 

Will let you know when I finally get a grip over the health anxiety etc.,

Dose History: 19 Feb 2014 - Escitalopram 10mg daily June 2015 - Started taper, 5mg every other day July 2015 - 5mg every 2 days August 2015 - 5mg every 3 days September 2015 - 5mg every 4 days Sept 14th - Completed tapering, but at 7 weeks "drug free" I suffered serious WD symptoms as a consequence of "incorrect" tapering. Nov 25 2015 - Re-instated Cipralex @ 2.5mg daily. WD symptoms faded. Held at this dose and experienced "windows and waves". 12 Oct 2017 Reduced dose to 1.25mg. 13 Mar 2018 Reduced dose to 0.625mg (approx.). 16 April 2018 0mg. Windows and waves triggered by stress (IBS/reflux, headaches, sinus issues) Aug 2019 Mirena coil fitted 6 Jan 2020 MAJOR Wave hit 19 months following last dose (protracted WD).  Symptoms listed below Mar 2020 Mirena coil removal.

Therapy: Nov 15th 2016 Re-started therapy Jan 19th 2017 Started CBT Dec 2017 Started listening to Hypnotherapy CD (self-esteem). Nov 2019 Started couples therapy.

Supplements: "Bioglan" Biotic Balance Ultimate Flora 10 billion CFU, live Bacteria, Probiotic, suitable for Vegetarians, with Lactobacillus Acidophilus, Lactobacillus Rhamnosus, Bifidobacterium Longum"Pukka" Vitalise a unique blend of 30 energising botanicals.

Diet: 16 April 2018 Detox cleanse / anti-candida for 90 days. Jan 2020 Started "small plate" diet (i.e child size portions).

Exercise: Stretching, Yoga, Pilates, Spinning, Elliptical/upper body workout, walking.

Medical Test Results: 4 Jan 2017 Homeopathic Treatment starts 24 Feb 2017 Started weight loss program 24 Mar 2017 Naturopathic Treatment + anti-Candida diet started due to suspected Candida Related Complex (CRC). DETOXED for 7 weeks to "re-set" gut. April 2017 "Genova Diagnostics" Comprehensive Stool Analysis NEGATIVE; Full Blood Count (Normal) / Blood Cholesterol: 5.6 (Borderline) / Blood Sugar (Normal) / 28 Jun 2017 FSH 8.2 / 14 Nov 2017 FSH 17.7 Dec 2017 Blood Cholesterol: 3.9 (Normal) / Kidney Function (Normal) / Blood Sugar (Normal). December 2017 "Genova Diagnostics" Food panel allergy (bloodwork) analysis - a few "VERY LOW/VL" allergens; Mar 2018 "Genova Diagnostics" SIBO urine analysis: High Level of Yeast/fungal markers found in small intestine but NO SIBO.  April 2018 Thyroid (Normal) / Full Blood Count (Normal) / FSH (Normal). 16 April 2018 Started anti-Candida diet - 3 month protocol.   25 March 2020 All test results "Normal". CRP" 5 mg/L (normal range to 0-5 mg/L).

Symptoms:  Flu-like symptoms, anxiety, anhedonia, sinus headaches right-side (severe), IBS issues/reflux (severe)**, tinnitus, fatigue, inner tremor, nausea, chills/hot flushes, pounding heart, muscular issues including stiff left hip flexor, intense anger, PSSD (ongoing).  **Histhamine intolerance (suspected).

Major Life Events: 

Re-located to UK from Canada: Jan 2016

My father died: 5:05pm, Monday 5 Feb 2018 Last Lexapro dose: 16 April 2018 (its now been over a year since I quit ADs)  Moved house: Friday 23rd February 2018  "Divorced" toxic Mother: Monday 26 March 2018 Starting working again: 19 November 2018  Diagnosed with: 5th August 2021 PTSD/C-PTSD Diagnosed with: March 2022 Interstitial Cystitis (IC)/Painful bladder syndrome

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i was told by 2 different doctors that withdrawals don't last longer than 6 weeks 😬

Took prozac 40 mg for 20 years.

January 2017 started cutting down prozac by 12.5% a week. End of February 2017 completely off prozac and withdrawals began.

Currently taking Levothyroxine 75 mcg, Magnesium citrate 200mg,Sage leaf 50mg daily

Amlodipine: October 2017 , discontinued 26 Feb 2019; Candesartan:  26 Feb 2019, 4mg.

Discontinued magnesium citrate 200mg Apr 3rd 2019

Reinstated prozac:  14 Jan 2019, 1mg; 26 Jan, 1.5mg; 4 Feb, 2mg; 16 Feb, 2.5mg; 2 Mar, 3mg; 5 Mar, 2.5mg, 23 Mar, 3 mg; 6 Apr, 3.5mg, 14 Apr 4mg, 23 Apr 5mg, 10 Jul 8mg, 1 Dec 20mg, 1 Apr 2020 40mg 

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  • 1 month later...
On 10/30/2018 at 8:16 AM, thecowisback said:

i was told by 2 different doctors that withdrawals don't last longer than 6 weeks

I was told the same thing too by several doctors. My psychiatrist is finally considering that I may be in PAWS.

 

Effexor 2008 - 2017 37.5 Mg . Upped to 150 mg on 2017.  November of 2017 to March 2018 went from 150 mg to 0.

Ativan May 2018 started 1 - 2 mg daily stayed at 1mg Sept 2018. 03/9/19 .975mg, 03/16 .950mg, 04/13 .94, 04/20 .93, 04/27 .916 slowly tapered from April to  August 2019 at .77mg,  December 2020 .10mg, Jan 2021 0.0 MG 

Valium June 2018 started 10 mg currently 2.5 mg daily, September 2021 0.0 mg

Trazadone started March 2018 100 mg at night to sleep Oct 16, 2018 went to 75 mg , November 13, 2018 67.5 mg, Dec 11 60.75 mg, January 21, 2019  54 mg, 02/09 50 mg, March 2022 0.0 mg

Six Ketamine treatments September 2018.  2 treatments a week for 3 weeks

Completely drug free as of March 2022

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Rezten. What did you say to make them even consider it? 

2010 bupropion(?) approx 1 month, cold turkey

2013 Lexapro 10mg from 2013-2015. Reduced to 5mg for 2.5-3ish years. Reduced to 2.5mg for 2 months then stopped early Sept 2018
Dec 8th 2018 Lexapro reinstated 0.5mg

Link to further details 

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2 minutes ago, Dylanmatthew said:

Rezten. What did you say to make them even consider it? 

My Dr. Feels bad there's nothing he can do for me.  I emailed him a reputable article about it long term SSRI withdrawal. He said he's seen it with Benzo withdrawal, but not SSRI.  He then said just because he hasnt seen it doesn't mean it doesn't exist.  So either he's humoring me or really is considering it.  Not much he can do for me except continue to write scripts to the compounding pharmacy so I can taper slowly.

 

I believe there are some links on this site about literature to show doctors.  I had a friend who showed all kinds of literature to doctors and they wouldn't believe her 

 

Effexor 2008 - 2017 37.5 Mg . Upped to 150 mg on 2017.  November of 2017 to March 2018 went from 150 mg to 0.

Ativan May 2018 started 1 - 2 mg daily stayed at 1mg Sept 2018. 03/9/19 .975mg, 03/16 .950mg, 04/13 .94, 04/20 .93, 04/27 .916 slowly tapered from April to  August 2019 at .77mg,  December 2020 .10mg, Jan 2021 0.0 MG 

Valium June 2018 started 10 mg currently 2.5 mg daily, September 2021 0.0 mg

Trazadone started March 2018 100 mg at night to sleep Oct 16, 2018 went to 75 mg , November 13, 2018 67.5 mg, Dec 11 60.75 mg, January 21, 2019  54 mg, 02/09 50 mg, March 2022 0.0 mg

Six Ketamine treatments September 2018.  2 treatments a week for 3 weeks

Completely drug free as of March 2022

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At least your doctor doesn't try to make you feel stupid. I wouldn't even try to convince any doctor, especially a PCP about SSRI WD. They won't listen. 

 

2010 bupropion(?) approx 1 month, cold turkey

2013 Lexapro 10mg from 2013-2015. Reduced to 5mg for 2.5-3ish years. Reduced to 2.5mg for 2 months then stopped early Sept 2018
Dec 8th 2018 Lexapro reinstated 0.5mg

Link to further details 

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  • 1 month later...

I am on my 8th day off Lexapro after 6weeks of 10mg and 2weeks of 5mg.I am hopeless, having some bad withdrawal simptoms since is my 10th day off, i tappered a little fast as the drug had severe side effects for me.I am trying to cope with all of this symptoms but i find it hard to do, I can barely do something, have severe brain fog, derealization, depersonalization, and lack of focud that is really annoying, I try to hold on calm but in some waves this is just hard to do, i can barely do something and function.How much is it going to last like this? I can’t wait to be me again

Lorazepam -2 weeks-1 week 3 mg.4 days 2mg, 3 days 1mg. 13-27 November 2018

Lexapro -2 months-6 weeks of 10mg, 2 weeks of 5mg 27 November 2018-27 January 2019

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  • 1 month later...

Hey everyone,

I hope all is well. I, like many of you, am sensitized to just about everything and my delicate system can’t handle the introduction of sugary foods, alcohol, Tylenol, CBD, etc etc. I’d like to think this goes away with time and one day post-withdrawal we’ll be able to enjoy the things we once did. Anyone who has seen the other side, is it possible to reintroduce these things or will we always be this way?

 

2005- 2008: Lorazepam (max dose- 1 MG daily)

2008- 2016: Lexapro (max dose-10 MG daily)

January 2017- March 2017- Pristiq (max dose- 100 MG daily)

April 2017- June 2017: Trintellix (max dose- 10 MG)

July 2017- October 2017:  Lexapro (max dose-10 MG daily)

November 2017- April 2018- Luvox (max dose- 100 MG)

May 2018- Zoloft (max dose- 18.75)

5/28/18- 3 MG Lexapro, 6/3/18- 3 MG Lexapro, 6/7/18- 3.5 MG Lexapro, 6/13/18- 4 MG Lexapro, 6/21/18- 4.5 MG Lexapro, 6/28/18- 3/29/21- 4 MG Lexapro, 3/30/21- Present- 3.8 MG Lexapro

**Bad Wave Caused by Trileptal 150 MG (one pill) in December '20 and Low Dose Naltrexone .12 MG (one pill) in April '21**

 

"The Journey is The Reward"

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Can anhedonia or DP from ssri's be permanent in some cases?  Are there any known instances of this?  I know there are people here who have been in WD for years but has anyone heard of these two things being irreversible?  

 

1994-2009 benzos from age 20 to 36.  Added Cymbalta 60mg in 2007.

2008-2009 tapered benzos to zero and quit Cymbalta Cold turkey.  WD HELL for two years

2011 started on Lexapro to combat the withdrawal and it worked.  

2015 switched to Prozac as Lexapro was not working as well

2017 quit Prozac cold turkey November and crashed into WD.  Reinstated Prozac In December with no benefit. 

2018 Switched back to Lexapro in January and it took most of the issues away in around 2-3 weeks

2019 In February Lexapro has pooped out and WD feelings back.  Tolerance WD I'm sure.

           March 12th Upped my dose to 30 mgs per doctor's advice to see if Tolerance WD goes away but have had worsening sleep issues with limbs jerking and less sleep.

           March 17th dropped back down to 20 mgs and had less limb jerking last night but sleep no better.  

           April 20th cut to 18mg.            

 

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I am sure dp or anhedonia is not permanent.They may be linked not only to withdrawal, but to depression aswell.You have to target every posibility in order to “find yourself”

Lorazepam -2 weeks-1 week 3 mg.4 days 2mg, 3 days 1mg. 13-27 November 2018

Lexapro -2 months-6 weeks of 10mg, 2 weeks of 5mg 27 November 2018-27 January 2019

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I've been worried about this issue of lasting damage caused by SSRI's, which is one of the many reasons I am trying to stop taking AD drugs. I read a book about this by Robert Whitaker "Anatomy of an Epidemic" in which he discusses how long term use causes damage that may be lasting.  A frightening topic for certain. I'd love to hear some feedback from those who have been taking AD for 10 or more years, have stopped, and are now "in recovery".   

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  • Altostrata changed the title to Can SSRIs Cause Permanent Anhedonia or DP?
  • Administrator

The nervous system is always changing and adapting. Nothing is permanent.

 

Any drug you take is going to change your body. Some aftereffects go away rather quickly while others linger in various forms. Life experiences and aging cause these changes as well. Time flows on, you can never step in the same river twice.

 

Consider whether questions that ask about "permanent" damage of one type or another might not indicate an inner belief that no matter what you do, you're doomed. That belief is stronger than any aftereffect of a drug and can very well be permanent, meaning held by you to your dying day.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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  • Administrator

Merged similar topics. Before starting a new topic in the Symptoms forum, look at the pinned topics at the top of the forum. If none address your question, please use search in this forum to see if there already is a topic about it. If there is no existing topic, you may start a new one.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Sorry about that Alto. Completely my fault. I appreciate the feedback nonetheless. 

2005- 2008: Lorazepam (max dose- 1 MG daily)

2008- 2016: Lexapro (max dose-10 MG daily)

January 2017- March 2017- Pristiq (max dose- 100 MG daily)

April 2017- June 2017: Trintellix (max dose- 10 MG)

July 2017- October 2017:  Lexapro (max dose-10 MG daily)

November 2017- April 2018- Luvox (max dose- 100 MG)

May 2018- Zoloft (max dose- 18.75)

5/28/18- 3 MG Lexapro, 6/3/18- 3 MG Lexapro, 6/7/18- 3.5 MG Lexapro, 6/13/18- 4 MG Lexapro, 6/21/18- 4.5 MG Lexapro, 6/28/18- 3/29/21- 4 MG Lexapro, 3/30/21- Present- 3.8 MG Lexapro

**Bad Wave Caused by Trileptal 150 MG (one pill) in December '20 and Low Dose Naltrexone .12 MG (one pill) in April '21**

 

"The Journey is The Reward"

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The thing that's so scary is how many different experiences there are.  You have people who seem not to recover, people who recover after 9 years, 5 years, 2 years even after a few months.  Then their doses, meds and time on them vary.  There are cases where people's issues started when they started the pills and continued after they stopped in like a month or so and claim they never have felt the same, and some do finally feel well  There are so many variables and outcomes in a situation that so desperately needs answers.  There is just no knowing.  We have all been very mistreated is the only sure thing.  

 

 

 

1994-2009 benzos from age 20 to 36.  Added Cymbalta 60mg in 2007.

2008-2009 tapered benzos to zero and quit Cymbalta Cold turkey.  WD HELL for two years

2011 started on Lexapro to combat the withdrawal and it worked.  

2015 switched to Prozac as Lexapro was not working as well

2017 quit Prozac cold turkey November and crashed into WD.  Reinstated Prozac In December with no benefit. 

2018 Switched back to Lexapro in January and it took most of the issues away in around 2-3 weeks

2019 In February Lexapro has pooped out and WD feelings back.  Tolerance WD I'm sure.

           March 12th Upped my dose to 30 mgs per doctor's advice to see if Tolerance WD goes away but have had worsening sleep issues with limbs jerking and less sleep.

           March 17th dropped back down to 20 mgs and had less limb jerking last night but sleep no better.  

           April 20th cut to 18mg.            

 

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How do you know when withdrawal is over with? 

Originally at 100 mg Zoloft and 150 mg xl Wellbutrin for ten years. 

Abruptly dropped 50 mg of Zoloft April 2018.

Cut Wellbutrin in half (75 mg) for a month in December 2018.

Cold turkeyed Wellbutrin January 2019.

Reinstated Wellbutrin half of 150 xl (75 mg) in January 2019 and added Xanax.

ER visit iv of 5 mg Haloperidol.

Finished Xanax taper, cold turkeyed Wellbutrin February 2019 and added 10 mg buspar twice daily.

Tapering buspar

 

50 mg Zoloft at 10:00 am

 

2.5 mg buspar at 9:00 pm 

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You wont feel like your mind has been hijacked by pirates or that you have been hit by a bus would be my guess. 

May 2016 - Aug 2016 - Prozac 20mg

 

March 2017 - June 2017 - Sertraline 100mg. Horrific withdrawal 5 m onths.

 

July 2017 - Aug 2017 - Mirtazapine 15mg. Horrific.

 

August 2017 - December 2017 Fluoxetine 10mg for 2 weeks ghen Escitalopram 20mg for 12 weeks. Never felt normal since this. Or baseline.

 

March 2018 - June 2018 - Escitalopram 5mg for 12 weeks. Stopped and here i am full of symptoms i never had.

 

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I think it feel like you getting back your freedom again to do whatever you want.😁( sorry for my English)

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4 hours ago, Leo1983 said:

You wont feel like your mind has been hijacked by pirates or that you have been hit by a bus would be my guess. 

Haha. I had to laugh at the dark humour of this. Basically this Hannah.

1999:  Paroxetine (20mg). Age 16. 2007-2008: Fluoxetine (Prozac) for 1.5 years (age 25) Citalopram 20mg 2002-2005, 2009: Escitalopram (20mg), 2 weeks, (age 26) (adverse  reaction)/*Valium 5mg/Temazepam 10mg 2010: Mirtazipine (Remeron)( do not remember dosage) 2010, 5 months.                     2010-2017: Citalopram (20mg) (age 27 to 34) 2016: i.1st Sept- 31st Oct Citalopram 10mg , ii.1st November 2017-30th November 2017, Citalopram 5mg iii.1st December 2017- 4th February 2018, Citalopram 0mg, iv.5th February 2018- March 2018 Citalopram 5mg (10mg every other day) 28th February- tried titration of 5mg ( some adverse effects)

2018: 1st March 2018- 1st June Citalopram 10 mg (tablet form) /started titration 8mg , then 7 mg.2018: June 15th- 10th July Citalopram 10 mg pill every other day 2018: 10th July - 13th Sept Citalopram- 0mg  (CBD oil first month of 0mg, passiflora on and off) 2018 13th Sept Citalopram  2mg ,  approx 16th Sept 4mg , approx 25th Sept 6mg held.  2019: 11 Feb 19: 7mg (instant bad rxn) 12 Feb 19 6mg held 1 May 19 5.4mg held 5 Oct 19 5.36mg 22 Oct 19 5.29mg 30 Oct 19 5.23mg 4/NOV/19 5.18mg 12 Nov 19 5.08mg 20 Nov 19 4.77mg 7 May 22 2.31mg 17/09/2023 0.8mg

(Herbal/Supplements since 1st September: Omega Fish Oil 1200mg, 663mg of EPA- 2 tablets a day, magnesium and magnesium bath salts)

I did not die, and yet I lost life’s breath
- Dante
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Lol. I keep saying there is nothing funny about this. 

 

Its barbaric.

May 2016 - Aug 2016 - Prozac 20mg

 

March 2017 - June 2017 - Sertraline 100mg. Horrific withdrawal 5 m onths.

 

July 2017 - Aug 2017 - Mirtazapine 15mg. Horrific.

 

August 2017 - December 2017 Fluoxetine 10mg for 2 weeks ghen Escitalopram 20mg for 12 weeks. Never felt normal since this. Or baseline.

 

March 2018 - June 2018 - Escitalopram 5mg for 12 weeks. Stopped and here i am full of symptoms i never had.

 

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14 hours ago, Leo1983 said:

Lol. I keep saying there is nothing funny about this. 

 

Its barbaric.

Of course it is. It’s hell. The British in me looks for the black humour. 

I described it to a friend as having your hands tied behind your back and being pushed over a cliff. Make it a plank and the  pirate metaphors reign. 

1999:  Paroxetine (20mg). Age 16. 2007-2008: Fluoxetine (Prozac) for 1.5 years (age 25) Citalopram 20mg 2002-2005, 2009: Escitalopram (20mg), 2 weeks, (age 26) (adverse  reaction)/*Valium 5mg/Temazepam 10mg 2010: Mirtazipine (Remeron)( do not remember dosage) 2010, 5 months.                     2010-2017: Citalopram (20mg) (age 27 to 34) 2016: i.1st Sept- 31st Oct Citalopram 10mg , ii.1st November 2017-30th November 2017, Citalopram 5mg iii.1st December 2017- 4th February 2018, Citalopram 0mg, iv.5th February 2018- March 2018 Citalopram 5mg (10mg every other day) 28th February- tried titration of 5mg ( some adverse effects)

2018: 1st March 2018- 1st June Citalopram 10 mg (tablet form) /started titration 8mg , then 7 mg.2018: June 15th- 10th July Citalopram 10 mg pill every other day 2018: 10th July - 13th Sept Citalopram- 0mg  (CBD oil first month of 0mg, passiflora on and off) 2018 13th Sept Citalopram  2mg ,  approx 16th Sept 4mg , approx 25th Sept 6mg held.  2019: 11 Feb 19: 7mg (instant bad rxn) 12 Feb 19 6mg held 1 May 19 5.4mg held 5 Oct 19 5.36mg 22 Oct 19 5.29mg 30 Oct 19 5.23mg 4/NOV/19 5.18mg 12 Nov 19 5.08mg 20 Nov 19 4.77mg 7 May 22 2.31mg 17/09/2023 0.8mg

(Herbal/Supplements since 1st September: Omega Fish Oil 1200mg, 663mg of EPA- 2 tablets a day, magnesium and magnesium bath salts)

I did not die, and yet I lost life’s breath
- Dante
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I often ask myself this. 

Not when it's over. But how to tell it is. 

The not knowing is scary... 

Escitalopram August 2015 - 20mg

Some time in winter 2017 down to 10mg with no problems

May 21 2018 5mg, June 4 2018 2.5mg, June 18 2018 0mg 

October 2 2018 arriving in hell

Reinstated 0.25mg

October 27 2018 0.35mg, November 23 2018 0.5mg, November 24 2018 0.6mg

November 28 2018 0.5mg and holding since 

June 2019 Finally stable at 0.5mg

January 2020 - Dezember 2023 tapered to 0 without many issues, jumped from 0.02mg 

January 3 2024 crash

Taking fish oil and magnesium 

L-Thyroxin 75 for Hashimoto's

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I think we will know. 

 

I think about how i feel in a window. Its the old me. Only anxious when i have to be. Not depressed. No head pressure. 

 

Like i used to be....... 

 

 

May 2016 - Aug 2016 - Prozac 20mg

 

March 2017 - June 2017 - Sertraline 100mg. Horrific withdrawal 5 m onths.

 

July 2017 - Aug 2017 - Mirtazapine 15mg. Horrific.

 

August 2017 - December 2017 Fluoxetine 10mg for 2 weeks ghen Escitalopram 20mg for 12 weeks. Never felt normal since this. Or baseline.

 

March 2018 - June 2018 - Escitalopram 5mg for 12 weeks. Stopped and here i am full of symptoms i never had.

 

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It’s frightening. I don’t know if it’s getting better to get bad again or what 

Originally at 100 mg Zoloft and 150 mg xl Wellbutrin for ten years. 

Abruptly dropped 50 mg of Zoloft April 2018.

Cut Wellbutrin in half (75 mg) for a month in December 2018.

Cold turkeyed Wellbutrin January 2019.

Reinstated Wellbutrin half of 150 xl (75 mg) in January 2019 and added Xanax.

ER visit iv of 5 mg Haloperidol.

Finished Xanax taper, cold turkeyed Wellbutrin February 2019 and added 10 mg buspar twice daily.

Tapering buspar

 

50 mg Zoloft at 10:00 am

 

2.5 mg buspar at 9:00 pm 

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This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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15 years with two windows lasting about ten minutes. The flu like symptoms and the itching got a bit better for a while a few years back but came back and again and have been permanent for years now. The only symptom that has been a bit better for a few years ia the involuntary movent problem. I  spoke to someone the other week who still has permanent muscle spasms after twenty years off Paxil.

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  • 4 years later...
On 3/29/2019 at 1:23 AM, Hannahe said:

How do you know when withdrawal is over with? 

 

Sorry for being pessimistic, but I am thinking if is being in WD process just a myth?

 

Think about it. How can someone be in healing process if after 5, 10, 12 years ia still having for instance permanet sexual dysfunction and/or akathisia and/or sensitivities and/or memory issues and so on.

 

I read story of J.A. Carter-Winward. She said that she has been having akathisia for 25 years and it's still there.

 

So???

 

And another example. One healing coach on youtube (can't say who) said recently (maybe 1 year ago) that he/she is 80% healed. Then I watched his/her 6 years old video saying he/she is 75% healed. LOL!

 

Maybe we don't heal, but just find the way to cope better with our damage... If we...

2009-2010: Asentra (50 mg)

2011: Cipralex (10 mg)

2009-2011: tried Zyprexa (5/2.5mg), Kventiax  (50/25mg) and Abilify (low dosage) (started refusing it - being zombie)

CT Cipralex, being free for several moths

2012-2016: Prozac (60 mg)

2016-2017: Alventa (75 mg)

2016: just tried Cymbalta and Ludiomil

2017-2018: Mirtazapine (30/45mg)

2012-2018: Wellbutrine (300 mg)

2014-2018: Lamotrigine (50/100/150 mg) CT Wellbutrin, tapering lamitrogine and mirtazapine too fast

Supplements: B12, D, Mg, trying B3, B1

I know I wrote a lot of nonsense here. I'm sorry, I feel shamed!

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 2/13/2024 at 7:24 AM, Prozack said:

Think about it. How can someone be in healing process if after 5, 10, 12 years ia still having for instance permanet sexual dysfunction and/or akathisia and/or sensitivities and/or memory issues and so on.


It is somewhat akin to toxic encephalitis, there is an acute stage and then a very protracted recovery. If this recovery process includes numerous setbacks it can extend in time substantially.

 

 

On 2/13/2024 at 7:24 AM, Prozack said:

I read story of J.A. Carter-Winward. She said that she has been having akathisia for 25 years and it's still there.



If you read her story, then you will know that 1) she believes in recovery , 2) she has gotten better, 3) her case is very complicated due to physical brain trauma she suffered way back.

 

On 2/13/2024 at 7:24 AM, Prozack said:

And another example. One healing coach on youtube (can't say who) said recently (maybe 1 year ago) that he/she is 80% healed. Then I watched his/her 6 years old video saying he/she is 75% healed. LOL!



It could be bull, it also happens that when you get back to functioning the last symptoms really stretch out. My own coach healed steadily from year 4 to 7, and then she plateaued. Her healing has continued but at a much slower pace. She is fully functional now.

I have had akathisia for over two years now, so I will tell how the latter years work urgh... 

December 2021 - Metoclopramide started. Akathisia symptoms start; Metoclopramide gets changed to PRN.

March 2022 - Akathisia diagnosed; Metoclopramide stopped; Propranolol 10mg x twice a day. Biperiden PRN (0.5mg to 1mg).

April 2022 - Tandospirone 30mg (10mg 3x day), Quetiapine 25mg (only taken once, immediate adr). Mirtazapine 7.5mg. . Discontinued Propranolol.

May 2022 - Mirtazapine upped to 15mg. Tandospirone cut to 2x 10mg. Low dose Depakote for the month; 100 to 200 to 100 to 0. Mirtazapine cut back to 11.75mg (3/4 of a 15mg pill).
June 2022 - Mirtazapine updose to 15mg. Tandospirone, Biperiden discontinued. Klonopin started PRN (0.5mg). 
September 2022 - Akathisia slowly starts improving, WD/ADR normal sets in in mid September. Hold for 4 months.
March 2023 - Off mirtazapine; no Klonopin for 5 months either! Started quercetin (250mg x 2) to soften the histamine rebound.

May 2023 - Stopped quercetin and changed from magnesium carbonate to oxide - reacted badly. Reverted back to carbonate. 
June 2023 - Added fish oil.
Current regimen: CALM Magnesium (Carbonate into Citrate) 175mg x2; Vitamin E 268mg x2; Fish oil (100mg Omega3; EPA 30mg; DHA 37mg)x2
Intro thread: 
https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/27095-portuguesesea-metoclopramide-akathisia-and-mirtazapine/

 

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@PortugueseSea Even if her story is complex, there are so many stories where people conclude in a way like: "I am healed, but still have..." For instance Laura Delano said that after 12 years off still has IBS and MCS.

 

Or lets say PSSD is permanent for many people.

 

We can conclude that recovery is possible maybe if we are alive for 300 years. Seems that recovery is to slow to be (completely) possible.

 

 

2009-2010: Asentra (50 mg)

2011: Cipralex (10 mg)

2009-2011: tried Zyprexa (5/2.5mg), Kventiax  (50/25mg) and Abilify (low dosage) (started refusing it - being zombie)

CT Cipralex, being free for several moths

2012-2016: Prozac (60 mg)

2016-2017: Alventa (75 mg)

2016: just tried Cymbalta and Ludiomil

2017-2018: Mirtazapine (30/45mg)

2012-2018: Wellbutrine (300 mg)

2014-2018: Lamotrigine (50/100/150 mg) CT Wellbutrin, tapering lamitrogine and mirtazapine too fast

Supplements: B12, D, Mg, trying B3, B1

I know I wrote a lot of nonsense here. I'm sorry, I feel shamed!

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