Skylarblue75 Posted September 14, 2014 Author Share Posted September 14, 2014 Still struggling, feel so uncomfortable in my own body, crying everyday multiple times a day, so exhausted but still having a hard time sitting still and when i do sit down it feels so uncomfortable, nothing feels real or seems real. My abdomen is constantly distended, feeling nausous, almost everyday after I eat about 10-15 minutes afterwards I get nausous and vomit a little,daily headaches, constant pain in my shoulders and lower back. I shake and twich, constant tremors, can't handle any amounts of stress, so quick to anger, so irritable. I can't be around my kids or husband they all just put me over the edge. I NEED SLEEP!!!!!!!!!!! I'm suicidal every day. I force myself out to walk and I'm barely able to do that Having problems with my speech and thought process. Freezing cold then sweating, still having horrible night sweats and chills, hair falling out. Ugh the sound and light sensitivity Everything makes me so uncomfortable and anxious. I can't live like this anymore, I miss being a human. I'm done, theres no chance for me to be well, 2 years of this madness!!!! All my symptoms point to tardive akathesis and permanent depression. I'm screwed, theres no hope for me, my brain is permantly damaged. I can't enjoy anything, I miss listening to music, watching movies with my kids on Friday night, being able to handle physical contact, driving without freaking out, going grocery shopping. I'm sorry but i can't do this for more years to come. I cant do this without support, I have no help. My kids need a mother, not a freak. Spring of 1998 place on birth control pills for irregular bleeding, high testosterone and one ovarian cyst, stayed on until April 2004, told to take hormone holiday, conceived first son 4 months later-VERY BIG SUPRISE, was told wouldn't be able to have childern or would need reproductive doctor to help. Got pregnant again 2006 with second son easily, then was on/off birthcontrol again until October 2011, concieved 3rd son in October 2011(tried many times to get pregant again when 2nd child was close to 2yrs, hormone problems started again after 2nd child, along with thyroid enlargement. Spring of 2001 celexa 10 mgs-rx'd by pcp for complaints of chronic fatigue, irritability and weight gain, stayed on until June 2005, switched to Lexapro 20mgs for PPD, stayed on Lexapro 6-7 months, couldn't afford to see psyh dr. and Lexapro, saw PCP switched back to 20mgs celexa in 2007, remained on until November 2011, was c/t off due to 3rd pregnancy, baby had umbilical cord defect, seemed ok during pregnancy, except for crying jags here and there. Our miracle baby was born July 20th 2012, healthy except with reflux. One month later the anxiety,restlessness,horrible crying, insomnia and the deepest depression ever. That started the psyh drug nightmare-benzo's,antidepressants, sleeping pills, mood stablizers. Nothing help made me worse, doctors just kept changing the meds frequently. 4 mental health hospitalizations, rapid detox off benzos Jan 2013, horrible withdrawal and still suffering withdrawal symptoms NO ONE BELIEVES ME, I feel like ive been on one consistant drug withdrawal for the past 2 years January 2014 slow titrate up of lexapro to 20 mgs-horrible side effects!!, was just rapidly taper by current pysh off to pursade me to try an MAOI-no way!!! Was told should consider ECT Link to comment
Muddles Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 Crying because I've said the exact words today - my children need a mother not a freak. I'm so sorry - I don't know what to say. 2008 - Doctors appointment with stress induced anxiety led to Citalopram prescription. Severe adverse reaction Mirtazapine prescribed - adverse reaction but told to stay on. Poop out - December 2013 15mg Currently on 13.5mg, April 12mg May 10th - 11mg June 10th - 10mg July 8th - 9mg September - 0mg Link to comment
Jen Posted September 14, 2014 Share Posted September 14, 2014 Hi Skylarblue! I just wanted to reach out to you and let you know you're not alone. I'm a mom to a 9 month old and am trying to get off ADs. I've been having a lot of the same awful symptoms and am struggling to work and take care of my baby. But we will get through this! Our brains are plastic and constantly changing (My husband is Ph.D. in neuroscience) and although 2 years feels like forever, it will get better. Your kids and family will see that you are a fighter. hugs! 2004 Started Celexa (20 mg) 2007-2008 Off Meds 2008 Zoloft (50 mg) 2011 Off Meds for 6 months 2011 Celexa (20 mg) 2012 Celexa (40 mg) 2014 Zoloft (25 mg) 7/2014 Zoloft (12.5 mg) Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Narcissus Posted September 15, 2014 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted September 15, 2014 . I'm screwed, theres no hope for me, my brain is permantly damaged. This is very unlikely Skylar. I'm so sorry things are so horrible. Remember that you're healing as you go through all of this. It sounds like you're in an especially bad place right now, which makes you feel that things are always this bad. But I'm looking back now and it seems you've had a few windows, clear signs that this is NOT permanent. You'll be in another one soon. Hang in there. 3 Years 150 mgs Effexor 2 month taper down to zero 3 terrible weeks at zero Back up to 75 mgs 2 months at 75 6 or so months back to regular dose of 150 - was able to restabilize fine. 3 month taper back to zero 1 HORRENDOUS week at zero 2 days back up to 37.5 3 days back up to 75 One week at 150 - unable to stabilize. Back down to 75 mgs At 75 mgs (half original dose) and suffering withdrawal symptoms since October 2012. "It is a radical cure for all pessimism to become ill, to remain ill for a good while, and then grow well for a still longer period." - Nietzsche Link to comment
btdt Posted September 19, 2014 Share Posted September 19, 2014 I have said those same words too and grieved for ages and now looking back I see a mixed bag of things... yes it was a rough go... not just for me but for those around me... still after you in it what else can you do but keep going. I don't know what the magic answer is I don't think there is one... I know this whatever kind of mother you are you kids are loving you... I know that This is still loaded for me and I think it always will be... but I made it thru this and I so did my kid and there is nothing special about us ... you can do it too I hope to come back later and say something wonderful but just now all I can manage is the pragmatic sense of a mother.... bare necessities... oh my what a great song.... maybe this video is my eloquence when I can' t find any hope you like it some a little watch it with the kids maybe. WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG Had a car accident in 85 Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89 Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above. One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking. As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/ There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in Link to comment
Muddles Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 Hugs! How are you? 2008 - Doctors appointment with stress induced anxiety led to Citalopram prescription. Severe adverse reaction Mirtazapine prescribed - adverse reaction but told to stay on. Poop out - December 2013 15mg Currently on 13.5mg, April 12mg May 10th - 11mg June 10th - 10mg July 8th - 9mg September - 0mg Link to comment
Skylarblue75 Posted September 23, 2014 Author Share Posted September 23, 2014 Hi everyone, checking in. Not doing great, this horrid insomnia is really taking a toll on me, along with all the other symptoms I'm experiencing. I had the follow up appointment with the reproductive endo at PENN, my lab work shows that I have low ovarian reserve and Hypercortisolism, my cortisol is really high, 3 times the normal. I'm in the process of doing 2-24 hours urine cortisol tests, just started the second test this morning, been up since 3 am. I've had high cortisol in blood and urine for almost 2 years now. I see another specialist down at PENN in November who is an endochronologist who specializes with ovarian and adrenal disorders. I've had alot of symptoms related to Cushing's syndrome for years now, even before the drug nightmare. I know that some of you are going to say that this is all withdrawal related. If i get all the tests done and they come back inconclusive then I will accept that drugs have ruined my body and brain thus destroying my life and will probably proceed with ECT, because I can't live life the way that I am. If the testing reveals that I do have Cushing's syndrome then I will deal with that. I really don't know what to do or think anymore, I'm tired of suffering. Spring of 1998 place on birth control pills for irregular bleeding, high testosterone and one ovarian cyst, stayed on until April 2004, told to take hormone holiday, conceived first son 4 months later-VERY BIG SUPRISE, was told wouldn't be able to have childern or would need reproductive doctor to help. Got pregnant again 2006 with second son easily, then was on/off birthcontrol again until October 2011, concieved 3rd son in October 2011(tried many times to get pregant again when 2nd child was close to 2yrs, hormone problems started again after 2nd child, along with thyroid enlargement. Spring of 2001 celexa 10 mgs-rx'd by pcp for complaints of chronic fatigue, irritability and weight gain, stayed on until June 2005, switched to Lexapro 20mgs for PPD, stayed on Lexapro 6-7 months, couldn't afford to see psyh dr. and Lexapro, saw PCP switched back to 20mgs celexa in 2007, remained on until November 2011, was c/t off due to 3rd pregnancy, baby had umbilical cord defect, seemed ok during pregnancy, except for crying jags here and there. Our miracle baby was born July 20th 2012, healthy except with reflux. One month later the anxiety,restlessness,horrible crying, insomnia and the deepest depression ever. That started the psyh drug nightmare-benzo's,antidepressants, sleeping pills, mood stablizers. Nothing help made me worse, doctors just kept changing the meds frequently. 4 mental health hospitalizations, rapid detox off benzos Jan 2013, horrible withdrawal and still suffering withdrawal symptoms NO ONE BELIEVES ME, I feel like ive been on one consistant drug withdrawal for the past 2 years January 2014 slow titrate up of lexapro to 20 mgs-horrible side effects!!, was just rapidly taper by current pysh off to pursade me to try an MAOI-no way!!! Was told should consider ECT Link to comment
Skylarblue75 Posted September 23, 2014 Author Share Posted September 23, 2014 Hi Muddles, hope you are doing better, hugs to you too. Spring of 1998 place on birth control pills for irregular bleeding, high testosterone and one ovarian cyst, stayed on until April 2004, told to take hormone holiday, conceived first son 4 months later-VERY BIG SUPRISE, was told wouldn't be able to have childern or would need reproductive doctor to help. Got pregnant again 2006 with second son easily, then was on/off birthcontrol again until October 2011, concieved 3rd son in October 2011(tried many times to get pregant again when 2nd child was close to 2yrs, hormone problems started again after 2nd child, along with thyroid enlargement. Spring of 2001 celexa 10 mgs-rx'd by pcp for complaints of chronic fatigue, irritability and weight gain, stayed on until June 2005, switched to Lexapro 20mgs for PPD, stayed on Lexapro 6-7 months, couldn't afford to see psyh dr. and Lexapro, saw PCP switched back to 20mgs celexa in 2007, remained on until November 2011, was c/t off due to 3rd pregnancy, baby had umbilical cord defect, seemed ok during pregnancy, except for crying jags here and there. Our miracle baby was born July 20th 2012, healthy except with reflux. One month later the anxiety,restlessness,horrible crying, insomnia and the deepest depression ever. That started the psyh drug nightmare-benzo's,antidepressants, sleeping pills, mood stablizers. Nothing help made me worse, doctors just kept changing the meds frequently. 4 mental health hospitalizations, rapid detox off benzos Jan 2013, horrible withdrawal and still suffering withdrawal symptoms NO ONE BELIEVES ME, I feel like ive been on one consistant drug withdrawal for the past 2 years January 2014 slow titrate up of lexapro to 20 mgs-horrible side effects!!, was just rapidly taper by current pysh off to pursade me to try an MAOI-no way!!! Was told should consider ECT Link to comment
btdt Posted September 24, 2014 Share Posted September 24, 2014 Hi everyone, checking in. Not doing great, this horrid insomnia is really taking a toll on me, along with all the other symptoms I'm experiencing. I had the follow up appointment with the reproductive endo at PENN, my lab work shows that I have low ovarian reserve and Hypercortisolism, my cortisol is really high, 3 times the normal. I'm in the process of doing 2-24 hours urine cortisol tests, just started the second test this morning, been up since 3 am. I've had high cortisol in blood and urine for almost 2 years now. I see another specialist down at PENN in November who is an endochronologist who specializes with ovarian and adrenal disorders. I've had alot of symptoms related to Cushing's syndrome for years now, even before the drug nightmare. I know that some of you are going to say that this is all withdrawal related. If i get all the tests done and they come back inconclusive then I will accept that drugs have ruined my body and brain thus destroying my life and will probably proceed with ECT, because I can't live life the way that I am. If the testing reveals that I do have Cushing's syndrome then I will deal with that. I really don't know what to do or think anymore, I'm tired of suffering. If you had a cushing issue before going on the drugs and are now in withdrawal you may not react to the treatment as they expect... I hope you mention to them I am not sure it would do any good as so few doctors understand withdrawal effects. Please keep us posted. peace to you WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG Had a car accident in 85 Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89 Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above. One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking. As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/ There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in Link to comment
mlrp Posted September 25, 2014 Share Posted September 25, 2014 Dear Skylar, You were so good and generous to look in on my thread recently. I can't pretend to know the extent of the challenges you face. And I'm not smart in terms of medical issues like cushing's (or even w/d - I'm learning as I go). Just wanted to let you know that I'm concerned for you and wish there was more I could do. This might sound weird, but you can "borrow" some of my windows anytime I'm having one. I practice a similar thing with my 12-step sponsor - when I'm particularly anxious, or lacking faith, I "borrow" some of her courage and faith until mine returns. That mental practice has given me a few precious moments of relative calm at times when I was really off the rails. Wishing you peace. 04/2013 diagnoses: severe insomnia, major depressive disorder, anxiety disorder, agoraphobia. PTSD (my diagnosis) Original scripts: 30 mg mirtazapine (Remeron) (1x day), 75 mg Bupropion HCL (Wellbutrin) (2x day), and 0.5 lorazepam (1x day or as needed) 05/05/14: Onset of acute Wellbutrin withdrawal symptoms after haphazard "taper" of 6-8 wks. 05/10/14: Joined this site. 05/11/14: Reinstated approx. 25 mg Wellbutrin (1x day) 05/14/14: Switched to 12.5 mg Wellbutrin (2x day) 06/28/14: Changed lorazepam dosing to .25 mg 2x a day - seems to be reducing anxiety flare-ups 07/28/14: Dosing Wellbutrin in a (home made) solution form 12.5 mg (2x day) 08/15/14: Remeron 28 25.2 22.7 20.5 18.5 16.7 15.1 13.6 mg (home made) solution 05/16/15: Have been dosing lorazepam at .5 mg in the morning, .25 mg in the afternoon, and .25 mg at bedtime. Anxiety has increased somewhat, possibly due to tolerance. Link to comment
Skylarblue75 Posted September 26, 2014 Author Share Posted September 26, 2014 Hi everyone, im living in a constant state of being pumped full of adrenaline, feeling jittery like constant electricity going through me. Sleep is pretty much non exsistant and when I try to sleep im jolted with intense feeling of panic in my chest and the internal vibrations. The insomnia has been going on now for 25 months. I cant live in a constant state of panic and fear. Im so freakin exhausted but cant lay down to nap during the day. Walking around all day feeling disconnected, dizzy,exhausted, aggitated, irritable the list of symptoms is endless. I have no hope left in me, I keep hearing things get better, but im beginning to reallh doubt that. Imdont know who I am anymore. I cant behave or function in the world. Maybe I am really this way andnhas only gotten worse because of my age And crazy out of baalance hormones. I cant reduce stress in my life because it's constant, I cant relax and its driving me insane. Who can live with theirmmind constantly racing all the time for 2 years straight!!!!! If this crap hasn't let up in 2 years then it has to be permanent. Im tried of feeling suicidal everyday, crying, questioning what the hell is wrong with me. Everything over stimulates me, im constantly jumpy, everything looks and feels wrong to me. Why wont my cortisol levels normalize??? The levels have been high for almost 2 years now, I need peace in my mind and body. Im desperate, but I refuse to be hospitalized again, it did nothing ffor me. I dont know what to do anymore, im so scared ill never be normal. Spring of 1998 place on birth control pills for irregular bleeding, high testosterone and one ovarian cyst, stayed on until April 2004, told to take hormone holiday, conceived first son 4 months later-VERY BIG SUPRISE, was told wouldn't be able to have childern or would need reproductive doctor to help. Got pregnant again 2006 with second son easily, then was on/off birthcontrol again until October 2011, concieved 3rd son in October 2011(tried many times to get pregant again when 2nd child was close to 2yrs, hormone problems started again after 2nd child, along with thyroid enlargement. Spring of 2001 celexa 10 mgs-rx'd by pcp for complaints of chronic fatigue, irritability and weight gain, stayed on until June 2005, switched to Lexapro 20mgs for PPD, stayed on Lexapro 6-7 months, couldn't afford to see psyh dr. and Lexapro, saw PCP switched back to 20mgs celexa in 2007, remained on until November 2011, was c/t off due to 3rd pregnancy, baby had umbilical cord defect, seemed ok during pregnancy, except for crying jags here and there. Our miracle baby was born July 20th 2012, healthy except with reflux. One month later the anxiety,restlessness,horrible crying, insomnia and the deepest depression ever. That started the psyh drug nightmare-benzo's,antidepressants, sleeping pills, mood stablizers. Nothing help made me worse, doctors just kept changing the meds frequently. 4 mental health hospitalizations, rapid detox off benzos Jan 2013, horrible withdrawal and still suffering withdrawal symptoms NO ONE BELIEVES ME, I feel like ive been on one consistant drug withdrawal for the past 2 years January 2014 slow titrate up of lexapro to 20 mgs-horrible side effects!!, was just rapidly taper by current pysh off to pursade me to try an MAOI-no way!!! Was told should consider ECT Link to comment
Muddles Posted September 26, 2014 Share Posted September 26, 2014 It's not who you are....you were never like this prior meds. I'm sorry - it's no life I know, but you will see some windows soon...I'm sure. Hugs 2008 - Doctors appointment with stress induced anxiety led to Citalopram prescription. Severe adverse reaction Mirtazapine prescribed - adverse reaction but told to stay on. Poop out - December 2013 15mg Currently on 13.5mg, April 12mg May 10th - 11mg June 10th - 10mg July 8th - 9mg September - 0mg Link to comment
Muddles Posted September 26, 2014 Share Posted September 26, 2014 Do you have emotions? Can you feel love for your children? 2008 - Doctors appointment with stress induced anxiety led to Citalopram prescription. Severe adverse reaction Mirtazapine prescribed - adverse reaction but told to stay on. Poop out - December 2013 15mg Currently on 13.5mg, April 12mg May 10th - 11mg June 10th - 10mg July 8th - 9mg September - 0mg Link to comment
Skylarblue75 Posted September 26, 2014 Author Share Posted September 26, 2014 Hey muddles, no I feel no love or joy,no happiness, in the rare time I do laugh it fills me with panic. I feel anger,fear,panic, anxiety,aggitated, restlessness and pure exhaustion. I over react to the littlest things, I don't know how to cope with just the everyday. This is all to much. Spring of 1998 place on birth control pills for irregular bleeding, high testosterone and one ovarian cyst, stayed on until April 2004, told to take hormone holiday, conceived first son 4 months later-VERY BIG SUPRISE, was told wouldn't be able to have childern or would need reproductive doctor to help. Got pregnant again 2006 with second son easily, then was on/off birthcontrol again until October 2011, concieved 3rd son in October 2011(tried many times to get pregant again when 2nd child was close to 2yrs, hormone problems started again after 2nd child, along with thyroid enlargement. Spring of 2001 celexa 10 mgs-rx'd by pcp for complaints of chronic fatigue, irritability and weight gain, stayed on until June 2005, switched to Lexapro 20mgs for PPD, stayed on Lexapro 6-7 months, couldn't afford to see psyh dr. and Lexapro, saw PCP switched back to 20mgs celexa in 2007, remained on until November 2011, was c/t off due to 3rd pregnancy, baby had umbilical cord defect, seemed ok during pregnancy, except for crying jags here and there. Our miracle baby was born July 20th 2012, healthy except with reflux. One month later the anxiety,restlessness,horrible crying, insomnia and the deepest depression ever. That started the psyh drug nightmare-benzo's,antidepressants, sleeping pills, mood stablizers. Nothing help made me worse, doctors just kept changing the meds frequently. 4 mental health hospitalizations, rapid detox off benzos Jan 2013, horrible withdrawal and still suffering withdrawal symptoms NO ONE BELIEVES ME, I feel like ive been on one consistant drug withdrawal for the past 2 years January 2014 slow titrate up of lexapro to 20 mgs-horrible side effects!!, was just rapidly taper by current pysh off to pursade me to try an MAOI-no way!!! Was told should consider ECT Link to comment
Muddles Posted September 26, 2014 Share Posted September 26, 2014 These drug companies have got a lot to answer for. My friend said we should get compensation....nothing could compensate what we have been left with....nothing. 2008 - Doctors appointment with stress induced anxiety led to Citalopram prescription. Severe adverse reaction Mirtazapine prescribed - adverse reaction but told to stay on. Poop out - December 2013 15mg Currently on 13.5mg, April 12mg May 10th - 11mg June 10th - 10mg July 8th - 9mg September - 0mg Link to comment
Skylarblue75 Posted September 26, 2014 Author Share Posted September 26, 2014 Yeah muddles I agree, but unfortunately once soneone takes any psych meds a stigma is placed on them. Like its our fault that we're in this place because we stopped the very poisons that didn't help to begin with. Im just so done with this wd crap Spring of 1998 place on birth control pills for irregular bleeding, high testosterone and one ovarian cyst, stayed on until April 2004, told to take hormone holiday, conceived first son 4 months later-VERY BIG SUPRISE, was told wouldn't be able to have childern or would need reproductive doctor to help. Got pregnant again 2006 with second son easily, then was on/off birthcontrol again until October 2011, concieved 3rd son in October 2011(tried many times to get pregant again when 2nd child was close to 2yrs, hormone problems started again after 2nd child, along with thyroid enlargement. Spring of 2001 celexa 10 mgs-rx'd by pcp for complaints of chronic fatigue, irritability and weight gain, stayed on until June 2005, switched to Lexapro 20mgs for PPD, stayed on Lexapro 6-7 months, couldn't afford to see psyh dr. and Lexapro, saw PCP switched back to 20mgs celexa in 2007, remained on until November 2011, was c/t off due to 3rd pregnancy, baby had umbilical cord defect, seemed ok during pregnancy, except for crying jags here and there. Our miracle baby was born July 20th 2012, healthy except with reflux. One month later the anxiety,restlessness,horrible crying, insomnia and the deepest depression ever. That started the psyh drug nightmare-benzo's,antidepressants, sleeping pills, mood stablizers. Nothing help made me worse, doctors just kept changing the meds frequently. 4 mental health hospitalizations, rapid detox off benzos Jan 2013, horrible withdrawal and still suffering withdrawal symptoms NO ONE BELIEVES ME, I feel like ive been on one consistant drug withdrawal for the past 2 years January 2014 slow titrate up of lexapro to 20 mgs-horrible side effects!!, was just rapidly taper by current pysh off to pursade me to try an MAOI-no way!!! Was told should consider ECT Link to comment
WinningThrough Posted September 26, 2014 Share Posted September 26, 2014 Oh Skylarblue I'm so sorry. I know what it's like to be pumped full of adrenaline day in day out and to be in a constant state of terror and have no good feelings, only bad ones. No one should have to live like this. I'm not sure when exactly you took your last drug.,was it January this year? I'm sure it's not permanent. You haven't been off the drugs that long. You've been suffering a long time but you've been on various drugs most of that time. It can take a ridiculously long time to recover from this. I hope one day soon you start to get windows and your nervous system starts to calm down. I'm so sorry this happened to you. The only way out is through. Aug 2013 - Augmentin leading to akathisia Sept-Nov 2013 - Citalopram 20mg, severe reaction, off at 5mg. Valium 4mg, prn Oct 2013 - 5 zopiclone tablets, 7.5mg End Nov 2013-end Feb 2014, Seroquel, top dose 150mg, off at 25mg End Nov 2013-early march 2014, Zoloft 100mg top dose, off at 25mg End Dec-2013-early April 2014, lorazepam 1mg prn April 3rd 2014 zoloft 5mg for a few days. 18/4/14 - zoloft, 1mg. Came off at 0.35 mg,14th June 2014 29 June 2014 - 1mg lorazepam, last ever 29 June 2014 - med free Link to comment
btdt Posted September 27, 2014 Share Posted September 27, 2014 Yeah muddles I agree, but unfortunately once soneone takes any psych meds a stigma is placed on them. Like its our fault that we're in this place because we stopped the very poisons that didn't help to begin with. Im just so done with this wd crap I hear that loud and clear... been there too. I can't help but think how refreshing it would be to abolish the system of insurance companies ect and have our doctors and scientists dependent on us for their income... I wonder how that would change the outcome and the advice they would give us. Sorry a bit off topic if you can't follow me here but to me it is the topic. Who the hell do they work for anyway... why are we giving them money to damage us... make us suffer ...only a mad person would do such a thing lol... over an out WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG Had a car accident in 85 Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89 Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above. One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking. As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/ There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in Link to comment
Muddles Posted September 27, 2014 Share Posted September 27, 2014 Me too...do anything to change this for us all. 2008 - Doctors appointment with stress induced anxiety led to Citalopram prescription. Severe adverse reaction Mirtazapine prescribed - adverse reaction but told to stay on. Poop out - December 2013 15mg Currently on 13.5mg, April 12mg May 10th - 11mg June 10th - 10mg July 8th - 9mg September - 0mg Link to comment
Muddles Posted September 28, 2014 Share Posted September 28, 2014 Thinking of you. X 2008 - Doctors appointment with stress induced anxiety led to Citalopram prescription. Severe adverse reaction Mirtazapine prescribed - adverse reaction but told to stay on. Poop out - December 2013 15mg Currently on 13.5mg, April 12mg May 10th - 11mg June 10th - 10mg July 8th - 9mg September - 0mg Link to comment
Meimeiquest Posted September 28, 2014 Share Posted September 28, 2014 My heart just hurts for you. I have never been anywhere near this sick, but I was kind of desperate. I got a lot of help from Mensah Medical in the Chicago area. You might want to watch their video on women and copper at mensahmedical.com. I have absolutely no idea if that is your problem, just throwing it out there. Another option is Kelly Brogan in NYC (kellybroganmd.com). We are pulling for you and the other moms of young children! 1st round Prozac 1989/90, clear depression symptoms. 2nd round Prozac started 1999 when admitted to dr. I was tired. Prozac pooped out, switch to Cymbalta 3/2006. Diagnosed with bipolar disorder due to mania 6/2006--then I was taken abruptly off Cymbalta and didn't know I had SSRI withdrawal. Lots of meds for my intractable "bipolar" symptoms. Zyprexa started about 9/06, mostly 5mg. Tapered 4/12 through12/29/12 Wellbutrin. XL 300 mg started 1/07, tapered 1/18/13 through 7/8/13 Oxazepam mostly continuously since 6/06, 30mg since 12/12, tapered 1.17.14 through 8.26.15 11/06 Lithium 600mg twice daily, 2.2.14 400mg TID DIY liquid, 2.12.14 1150mg, 3.2.14 1100mg, 3.18.14 1075mg, 4/14 updose to 1100mg, 6.1.14 900 mg capsules 7.8.14 810mg, 8.17.14 725mg, 8.24.24 700mg...10.22.14 487.5mg, 3.9.15 475mg, 4.1.15 462.5mg 4.21.15 450mg 8.11.15 375mg, 11.28.15 362.5mg, back to 375mg four days later, 3.4.16 updose to 475 (too much going on to risk trouble) 9/4/13 Toprol-XL 25mg daily for sudden hypertension, tapered 11.12.13 through 5.3.14, last 10 days or so switched to atenolol 7.4.14 Started Walsh Protocol 56 years old Link to comment
pokiok Posted September 28, 2014 Share Posted September 28, 2014 I'm sorry Skylar, I wish there was something to say. Nothing I say can ease your suffering but just know that I'm here for you as well as loads others. Please keep checking in and venting all you want. Sometimes just being able to talk helps take the edge off a bit. You can always Skype me if you want. I would listen and you could scream, cry, break things, whatever. Warm hugs... 1995-Zoloft 100mg 1996-Off Zoloft C/T 2000-Zoloft 100mg 2002-Off Zoloft after 50mg decrease then C/T 2006-Zoloft 50mg 2009- Off of everything except occasional Xanax as needed for anxiety Fall 2009-Pregnant with extreme morning sickness, doc prescribed Zoloft again 50mg Summer 2010-Zoloft and Klonopin for anxiety Fall 2011-Quite Zoloft C/T had severe withdrawal, ended up on Lexapro Fall 2011- Lexapro 20mg and Klonopin .5mg May 2014-After weaning myself down to 5mg of Lexapro,I quit. I was fine for the first month August 4th-started back on 5mg of Lexapro, hoping to do a proper taper this time. Also on .5mg of Klonopin and .25mg of Xanax as needed. Link to comment
Muddles Posted September 28, 2014 Share Posted September 28, 2014 You're all so lovely on this board...so supportive. 2008 - Doctors appointment with stress induced anxiety led to Citalopram prescription. Severe adverse reaction Mirtazapine prescribed - adverse reaction but told to stay on. Poop out - December 2013 15mg Currently on 13.5mg, April 12mg May 10th - 11mg June 10th - 10mg July 8th - 9mg September - 0mg Link to comment
westcoast Posted September 29, 2014 Share Posted September 29, 2014 Who knows? Maybe there will be compensation some day, as with asbestos.First the syndrome has to be better-studied and acknowledged and given its own, specific name, like post-psychotropic neurologic syndrome. To the rest of the world, we look like malcontent neurotics who are crazily refusing to "take our meds." Or we seem to have "gone crazy" when we "went off our meds." The second one is close to the truth for many of us, but misleads the naive into thinking the meds had been keeping terrible symptoms at bay. For most of us the meds did nothing but cause symptoms, and the removal of the meds caused a horrendous syndrome.Know what? That grandfather who killed his grandchildren and daughter very recently had been on bipolar meds and recently told his daughter he was discontinuing them because they weren't working. And the man who entered the White House with a knife had also been on psych meds for depression and anxiety (and might have just discontinued them; I forget.)Perhaps it has to happen to a famous person in a clear-cut way before the general public will embrace it as a thing. (I wonder about Charlie Sheen's odd outburst a few years ago, btw.) 2009: Cancer hospital said I had adjustment disorder because I thought they were doing it wrong. Their headshrinker prescribed Effexor, and my life set on a new course. I didn't know what was ahead, like a passenger on Disneyland's Matterhorn, smiling and waving as it climbs...clink, clink, clink. 2010: Post surgical accidental Effexor discontinuation by nurses, masked by intravenous Dilaudid. (The car is balanced at the top of the track.) I get home, pop a Vicodin, and ... Whooosh...down, down, down, down, down...goes the trajectory of my life, up goes my mood and tendency to think everything is a good idea.2012: After the bipolar jig was up, now a walking bag of unrelated symptoms, I went crazy on Daytrana (the Ritalin skin patch by Noven), because ADHD was a perfect fit for a bag of unrelated symptoms. I was prescribed Effexor for the nervousness of it, and things got neurological. An EEG showed enough activity to warrant an epilepsy diagnosis rather than non-epileptic ("psychogenic") seizures. 2013-2014: Quit everything and got worse. I probably went through DAWS: dopamine agonist withdrawal syndrome. I drank to not feel, but I felt a lot: dread, fear, regret, grief: an utter sense of total loss of everything worth breathing about, for almost two years. I was not suicidal but I wanted to be dead, at least dead to the experience of my own brain and body. 2015: I began to recover after adding virgin coconut oil and organic grass-fed fed butter to a cup of instant coffee in the morning. I did it hoping for mental acuity and better memory. After ten days of that, I was much better, mood-wise. Approximately neutral. And, I experienced drowsiness. I could sleep. Not exactly happy, I did 30 days on Wellbutrin, because it had done me no harm in the past. I don't have the DAWS mood or state of mind. It never feel like doing anything if it means standing up. In fact, I don't especially like moving. I'm a brain with a beanbag body. Link to comment
westcoast Posted September 29, 2014 Share Posted September 29, 2014 (Sorry Skylar that was kind of a thread-hijacking.) 2009: Cancer hospital said I had adjustment disorder because I thought they were doing it wrong. Their headshrinker prescribed Effexor, and my life set on a new course. I didn't know what was ahead, like a passenger on Disneyland's Matterhorn, smiling and waving as it climbs...clink, clink, clink. 2010: Post surgical accidental Effexor discontinuation by nurses, masked by intravenous Dilaudid. (The car is balanced at the top of the track.) I get home, pop a Vicodin, and ... Whooosh...down, down, down, down, down...goes the trajectory of my life, up goes my mood and tendency to think everything is a good idea.2012: After the bipolar jig was up, now a walking bag of unrelated symptoms, I went crazy on Daytrana (the Ritalin skin patch by Noven), because ADHD was a perfect fit for a bag of unrelated symptoms. I was prescribed Effexor for the nervousness of it, and things got neurological. An EEG showed enough activity to warrant an epilepsy diagnosis rather than non-epileptic ("psychogenic") seizures. 2013-2014: Quit everything and got worse. I probably went through DAWS: dopamine agonist withdrawal syndrome. I drank to not feel, but I felt a lot: dread, fear, regret, grief: an utter sense of total loss of everything worth breathing about, for almost two years. I was not suicidal but I wanted to be dead, at least dead to the experience of my own brain and body. 2015: I began to recover after adding virgin coconut oil and organic grass-fed fed butter to a cup of instant coffee in the morning. I did it hoping for mental acuity and better memory. After ten days of that, I was much better, mood-wise. Approximately neutral. And, I experienced drowsiness. I could sleep. Not exactly happy, I did 30 days on Wellbutrin, because it had done me no harm in the past. I don't have the DAWS mood or state of mind. It never feel like doing anything if it means standing up. In fact, I don't especially like moving. I'm a brain with a beanbag body. Link to comment
Muddles Posted September 30, 2014 Share Posted September 30, 2014 Dropping by - sending love 2008 - Doctors appointment with stress induced anxiety led to Citalopram prescription. Severe adverse reaction Mirtazapine prescribed - adverse reaction but told to stay on. Poop out - December 2013 15mg Currently on 13.5mg, April 12mg May 10th - 11mg June 10th - 10mg July 8th - 9mg September - 0mg Link to comment
Skylarblue75 Posted September 30, 2014 Author Share Posted September 30, 2014 Hi everyone, thanks to all for you support, no worries westcoast Still dealing with the same crap, except now for the past 3-4 days random parts of my face go numb, even my ears and tongue. A lot of tingling and numbness in my arms,hands,legs and feet with random bouts of muscle burning. Been off benzos now for 20 months and my last med Lexapro for 4 1/2 months. Got the results from the 2 urine cortisol tests from last week and my results are higher than they were a year ago. Seeing an endochronologist at PENN that specializes with adrenal/ovarian disorders on November 10th, I don't know what and if anything will come of the visit. Ugh just so tired, so sick of this chronic anxiety for no reason and everything else. Want to pass out and sleep for a year straight and wake up to all of this being a horrible nightmare. Sending lots of hugs and love to all Spring of 1998 place on birth control pills for irregular bleeding, high testosterone and one ovarian cyst, stayed on until April 2004, told to take hormone holiday, conceived first son 4 months later-VERY BIG SUPRISE, was told wouldn't be able to have childern or would need reproductive doctor to help. Got pregnant again 2006 with second son easily, then was on/off birthcontrol again until October 2011, concieved 3rd son in October 2011(tried many times to get pregant again when 2nd child was close to 2yrs, hormone problems started again after 2nd child, along with thyroid enlargement. Spring of 2001 celexa 10 mgs-rx'd by pcp for complaints of chronic fatigue, irritability and weight gain, stayed on until June 2005, switched to Lexapro 20mgs for PPD, stayed on Lexapro 6-7 months, couldn't afford to see psyh dr. and Lexapro, saw PCP switched back to 20mgs celexa in 2007, remained on until November 2011, was c/t off due to 3rd pregnancy, baby had umbilical cord defect, seemed ok during pregnancy, except for crying jags here and there. Our miracle baby was born July 20th 2012, healthy except with reflux. One month later the anxiety,restlessness,horrible crying, insomnia and the deepest depression ever. That started the psyh drug nightmare-benzo's,antidepressants, sleeping pills, mood stablizers. Nothing help made me worse, doctors just kept changing the meds frequently. 4 mental health hospitalizations, rapid detox off benzos Jan 2013, horrible withdrawal and still suffering withdrawal symptoms NO ONE BELIEVES ME, I feel like ive been on one consistant drug withdrawal for the past 2 years January 2014 slow titrate up of lexapro to 20 mgs-horrible side effects!!, was just rapidly taper by current pysh off to pursade me to try an MAOI-no way!!! Was told should consider ECT Link to comment
WinningThrough Posted September 30, 2014 Share Posted September 30, 2014 So sorry SB. I hope the endocrinologist is able to help you in some way. Sending hugs to you x The only way out is through. Aug 2013 - Augmentin leading to akathisia Sept-Nov 2013 - Citalopram 20mg, severe reaction, off at 5mg. Valium 4mg, prn Oct 2013 - 5 zopiclone tablets, 7.5mg End Nov 2013-end Feb 2014, Seroquel, top dose 150mg, off at 25mg End Nov 2013-early march 2014, Zoloft 100mg top dose, off at 25mg End Dec-2013-early April 2014, lorazepam 1mg prn April 3rd 2014 zoloft 5mg for a few days. 18/4/14 - zoloft, 1mg. Came off at 0.35 mg,14th June 2014 29 June 2014 - 1mg lorazepam, last ever 29 June 2014 - med free Link to comment
westcoast Posted September 30, 2014 Share Posted September 30, 2014 Keep us posted! And as for sleeping for a year, it might be the real cure for what ails us... 2009: Cancer hospital said I had adjustment disorder because I thought they were doing it wrong. Their headshrinker prescribed Effexor, and my life set on a new course. I didn't know what was ahead, like a passenger on Disneyland's Matterhorn, smiling and waving as it climbs...clink, clink, clink. 2010: Post surgical accidental Effexor discontinuation by nurses, masked by intravenous Dilaudid. (The car is balanced at the top of the track.) I get home, pop a Vicodin, and ... Whooosh...down, down, down, down, down...goes the trajectory of my life, up goes my mood and tendency to think everything is a good idea.2012: After the bipolar jig was up, now a walking bag of unrelated symptoms, I went crazy on Daytrana (the Ritalin skin patch by Noven), because ADHD was a perfect fit for a bag of unrelated symptoms. I was prescribed Effexor for the nervousness of it, and things got neurological. An EEG showed enough activity to warrant an epilepsy diagnosis rather than non-epileptic ("psychogenic") seizures. 2013-2014: Quit everything and got worse. I probably went through DAWS: dopamine agonist withdrawal syndrome. I drank to not feel, but I felt a lot: dread, fear, regret, grief: an utter sense of total loss of everything worth breathing about, for almost two years. I was not suicidal but I wanted to be dead, at least dead to the experience of my own brain and body. 2015: I began to recover after adding virgin coconut oil and organic grass-fed fed butter to a cup of instant coffee in the morning. I did it hoping for mental acuity and better memory. After ten days of that, I was much better, mood-wise. Approximately neutral. And, I experienced drowsiness. I could sleep. Not exactly happy, I did 30 days on Wellbutrin, because it had done me no harm in the past. I don't have the DAWS mood or state of mind. It never feel like doing anything if it means standing up. In fact, I don't especially like moving. I'm a brain with a beanbag body. Link to comment
btdt Posted October 1, 2014 Share Posted October 1, 2014 Hi everyone, thanks to all for you support, no worries westcoast Still dealing with the same crap, except now for the past 3-4 days random parts of my face go numb, even my ears and tongue. A lot of tingling and numbness in my arms,hands,legs and feet with random bouts of muscle burning. Been off benzos now for 20 months and my last med Lexapro for 4 1/2 months. Got the results from the 2 urine cortisol tests from last week and my results are higher than they were a year ago. Seeing an endochronologist at PENN that specializes with adrenal/ovarian disorders on November 10th, I don't know what and if anything will come of the visit. Ugh just so tired, so sick of this chronic anxiety for no reason and everything else. Want to pass out and sleep for a year straight and wake up to all of this being a horrible nightmare. Sending lots of hugs and love to all Not sure if this is reassuring or not it is meant to be I have had all these new symptoms that you have it could all still be withdrawal ...hope your getting thru your days ok peace WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG Had a car accident in 85 Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89 Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above. One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking. As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/ There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in Link to comment
Skylarblue75 Posted October 7, 2014 Author Share Posted October 7, 2014 This is all too much for me to indure, I think im psychotic or have a psychotic break down. I see no hope for recovery, I so exhausted, I cant take not sleeping. Mh family is destroyed. My mind and body wont stop torturing me, I have no interest in life and feel nothing positive. Was given an ultimatum, get better because this is not working or go back in the hospital. I cant function and care for my kids the way a mother should. Please lord just take me, ivr lost hope Spring of 1998 place on birth control pills for irregular bleeding, high testosterone and one ovarian cyst, stayed on until April 2004, told to take hormone holiday, conceived first son 4 months later-VERY BIG SUPRISE, was told wouldn't be able to have childern or would need reproductive doctor to help. Got pregnant again 2006 with second son easily, then was on/off birthcontrol again until October 2011, concieved 3rd son in October 2011(tried many times to get pregant again when 2nd child was close to 2yrs, hormone problems started again after 2nd child, along with thyroid enlargement. Spring of 2001 celexa 10 mgs-rx'd by pcp for complaints of chronic fatigue, irritability and weight gain, stayed on until June 2005, switched to Lexapro 20mgs for PPD, stayed on Lexapro 6-7 months, couldn't afford to see psyh dr. and Lexapro, saw PCP switched back to 20mgs celexa in 2007, remained on until November 2011, was c/t off due to 3rd pregnancy, baby had umbilical cord defect, seemed ok during pregnancy, except for crying jags here and there. Our miracle baby was born July 20th 2012, healthy except with reflux. One month later the anxiety,restlessness,horrible crying, insomnia and the deepest depression ever. That started the psyh drug nightmare-benzo's,antidepressants, sleeping pills, mood stablizers. Nothing help made me worse, doctors just kept changing the meds frequently. 4 mental health hospitalizations, rapid detox off benzos Jan 2013, horrible withdrawal and still suffering withdrawal symptoms NO ONE BELIEVES ME, I feel like ive been on one consistant drug withdrawal for the past 2 years January 2014 slow titrate up of lexapro to 20 mgs-horrible side effects!!, was just rapidly taper by current pysh off to pursade me to try an MAOI-no way!!! Was told should consider ECT Link to comment
Skylarblue75 Posted October 7, 2014 Author Share Posted October 7, 2014 No more, please god no more Spring of 1998 place on birth control pills for irregular bleeding, high testosterone and one ovarian cyst, stayed on until April 2004, told to take hormone holiday, conceived first son 4 months later-VERY BIG SUPRISE, was told wouldn't be able to have childern or would need reproductive doctor to help. Got pregnant again 2006 with second son easily, then was on/off birthcontrol again until October 2011, concieved 3rd son in October 2011(tried many times to get pregant again when 2nd child was close to 2yrs, hormone problems started again after 2nd child, along with thyroid enlargement. Spring of 2001 celexa 10 mgs-rx'd by pcp for complaints of chronic fatigue, irritability and weight gain, stayed on until June 2005, switched to Lexapro 20mgs for PPD, stayed on Lexapro 6-7 months, couldn't afford to see psyh dr. and Lexapro, saw PCP switched back to 20mgs celexa in 2007, remained on until November 2011, was c/t off due to 3rd pregnancy, baby had umbilical cord defect, seemed ok during pregnancy, except for crying jags here and there. Our miracle baby was born July 20th 2012, healthy except with reflux. One month later the anxiety,restlessness,horrible crying, insomnia and the deepest depression ever. That started the psyh drug nightmare-benzo's,antidepressants, sleeping pills, mood stablizers. Nothing help made me worse, doctors just kept changing the meds frequently. 4 mental health hospitalizations, rapid detox off benzos Jan 2013, horrible withdrawal and still suffering withdrawal symptoms NO ONE BELIEVES ME, I feel like ive been on one consistant drug withdrawal for the past 2 years January 2014 slow titrate up of lexapro to 20 mgs-horrible side effects!!, was just rapidly taper by current pysh off to pursade me to try an MAOI-no way!!! Was told should consider ECT Link to comment
Muddles Posted October 7, 2014 Share Posted October 7, 2014 My heart breaks for you. For our children....these drugs have destroyed us and destroyed our families....I hate these drugs...I hate them. 2008 - Doctors appointment with stress induced anxiety led to Citalopram prescription. Severe adverse reaction Mirtazapine prescribed - adverse reaction but told to stay on. Poop out - December 2013 15mg Currently on 13.5mg, April 12mg May 10th - 11mg June 10th - 10mg July 8th - 9mg September - 0mg Link to comment
Muddles Posted October 7, 2014 Share Posted October 7, 2014 Is there no-where you could go for a bit of rest-bite? 2008 - Doctors appointment with stress induced anxiety led to Citalopram prescription. Severe adverse reaction Mirtazapine prescribed - adverse reaction but told to stay on. Poop out - December 2013 15mg Currently on 13.5mg, April 12mg May 10th - 11mg June 10th - 10mg July 8th - 9mg September - 0mg Link to comment
LexAnger Posted October 7, 2014 Share Posted October 7, 2014 this is so heart breaking! I am so sorry am praying to GOD for you. I always wonder we should do something together like a class lawsuit to get some justice for our suffering and damage, and for the hope to stop more victims being thrown into this hell. I dont know how, but I believe everyone here will be supportive and each case is a bloody proof of how much damages these drugs have made to thousands and hundrends! Drug free Sep. 23 2017 2009 Mar.: lexapro 10mg for headache for 2 weeks. 2009-2012: on and off 1/4 to 1/3 of 10mg 2012 June--2013 Jan,: 1/4-1/3 of 10mg generic, bad jaw pain 2013 Jan-Mar: 10 mg generic. severe jaw and head pain; 2013 Mar--Aug. started tapering (liquid ever since) from 10 to 5 (one step) then gradually down to 2.25 mg by July. first ever panic attack, severe head/jaw pain 2013 Aug.: back to 2.75 mg; Nov: back to Brand Lex. 2.75mg -- 3mg, 2014 June: stopped PPI, head pressure/numbness. up-dosed 4.5mg, severe reaction mental symptoms added on 2014 Aug--2015 Aug: Micro taper down to 3.2mg, .025mg (<1%) cut holding 2-3 weeks. 2015 Aug 15th, Accidental one dose of 4.2mg. worsening brain non-functional, swollen head, body, coma like, DR 2016 Feb., started dosing 10am through 11 pm everyday 2/13--3.2mg, 3/15-- 2.9mg, 4/19-- 2.6mg, 6/26--2.2mg, 7/22 --1.9mg, 8/16--1.8mg，8/31--1.7m g, 9/13--1.6mg, 9/27--1.5mg, 10/8--1.4mg, 10/14--1.3mg， 11/1--1.2mg, 11/29--1.1mg, 12/12--1mg, 12/22--0.9mg 2017: 1/7--0.8mg, 1/15--0.7mg, 1/17--0.6mg, 1/20--0.52, 1/21--0.4mg, 1/22--0.26, 1/23--0.2, 2/13--0.13mg, 2/20--0.06mg, 3/18--0.13mg, 6/1--0.12mg, 7/6--0.1mg, 7/14--0.08mg, 8/17--0.04mg, 8/20--0.03mg, 8/28--0.02mg, 9/6--0.0205mg, 9/8--0.02mg, 9/17--0.015mg, 9/20--0.01mg, 9/21--0.0048mg, 9/22--0.0001mg, Link to comment
Muddles Posted October 7, 2014 Share Posted October 7, 2014 I'm in on that one. 2008 - Doctors appointment with stress induced anxiety led to Citalopram prescription. Severe adverse reaction Mirtazapine prescribed - adverse reaction but told to stay on. Poop out - December 2013 15mg Currently on 13.5mg, April 12mg May 10th - 11mg June 10th - 10mg July 8th - 9mg September - 0mg Link to comment
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