blazesboylan: Why should I taper?

[Bridgetini]

Hi Blazes,

just saying hello from Ireland. Hang in there, you are doing great. Can you do something to distract you from the pressure in your skull - a walk in the drizzle, snapping a rubber band, doing a jigsaw, defrosting the fridge..

 

 

Happy Independence Day.

 

Bridgetini

[dowdaller]

Today I have gone to 72 mgs Effexor which is the lowest level that I have ever been at (I think, I don't have records prior to 2014) since I started on it 8 years ago.

 

I am thinking (as is often advised here) not to make any further cuts to the olanzapine for a while. I feel that it may be saving me from the full wrath of venlafaxine withdrawal. Or perhaps the mirtazapine is helping there also.

 

No other news. The pressure in my skull is pretty bad tonight though. 

 

I would sit on the olanzapine for the time being, dropping the effexor is hard enough, maybe try mindfulness to release the pressure on your skull.

[blazesboylan]

Thanks Bridgetini and Dowdaller. I am feeling remarkably well today for some reason or another. Better than usual anyway.

 

Yes, I will hold steady on the olanzapine for a while.

 

By the way, and I have said this before, but I find the site https://www.patientslikeme.com/ really good for tracking symptoms and medications etc. It's very useful for spotting patterns. I log in every day and record how I am feeling. I also update my treatments (levels of medications) as they change.

 

You might want to be careful to protect your anonymity though by not using a real profile picture and perhaps signing up with an e-mail address that isn't based on your real name.

 

All the best,

Blazes.

 

 

[blazesboylan]

Hello,

 

A happy Monday to everyone. I thought that I would post an update as I haven't been here for a while. Well, it's been about a month I suppose.

 

Anyway, I made another cut to the Effexor a week ago. Since then I haven't been feeling great. Major fatigue. I have been feeling quite low also and anxious. Irritable at times also. I suppose that I could try going back up a little but I am thinking that I will just sit it out now because in my experience it generally passes. I think that it is probably passing now anyway.

 

I was wondering if I might be experiencing some benzo withdrawal but probably not. I haven't used diazepam (valium) in over two weeks now. I had been using it occasionally since early May although I was careful not to use it too frequently or for too long. There was one point where I used it every day for a week though. However, for the rest of time I didn't use it for more days than I did. I made sure that there were periods of several successive days when I didn't take any also.

 

I was careful with the benzo as I know that dependence/tolerance can develop very quickly. I didn't find it to be of much use for anxiety anyway. Even if I took 10 mgs. I might fall asleep though. 

 

That's all really. Just checking in.

 

Blazes.

[blazesboylan]

I have had a rough 10 days so I have gone for a little reinstatement. Back up to 75 mgs Effexor. My signature has been updated accordingly. Hopefully there will be a positive effect soon.

[blazesboylan]

Hello,

 

I thought that I would post since I haven't been here in a bit. I haven't been doing remarkably well for a while now. I am suffering with a lot of anxiety and my mood can be low at times. I am surprised as I haven't made any changes in about 6 weeks now. I am thinking that I will hold steady for a while and see if things improve a little. I suppose that there have been some external factors so I'm not sure if it's really withdrawal related. That's all really.

 

Blazes.

[dowdaller]

Good stuff blazes hope you feel better soon, Im struggling myself I am putting it down to the weather, hoping this wave will pass soon.

[blazesboylan]

Hello,

 

I thought that I would check in as I haven't reported for a while. I've been busy. I made another cut to the Effexor yesterday. Since the cut prior to the one yesterday I suppose overall that I have been doing relatively ok. Some anxiety and mild depression at times. There is the constant pressure in my forehead though.

 

Anyway, I am at 65 mg venlafaxine now which is think is quite amazing given that I started at 300 mg. That's almost an 80% reduction. I never thought that it would take this long however. It's been 2 and a half years.

 

I have been busy for the last while between full-time work and postgraduate studies part time. I am generally coping well with both.

 

Happy Halloween 

[bubble]

This is really a great achievement. Both on the drugs front and how much you do in your life. I just hope you are not too hard on yourself. Full-time work and study would be draining for everyone.

 

Thank you for the updates and good luck with the rest of your journey.

[blazesboylan]

Thanks very much Bubble. I'm feeling reasonably well as I am writing. I am confident that I will manage to wean myself of the effexor at this stage. However, there is a while to go yet and then I will have to deal with the mirtazapine and olanzapine also.

 

I might consider interleaving effexor/olanzapine cuts actually. I haven't made a cut to the olanzapine in a while now. In my experience the drops in the effexor have the most profound withdrawal effects. It is notorious in this respect I suppose.

 

I hope that you and everyone else are having a good weekend.

 

Best wishes to you also!

 

[dowdaller]

Great work blazes you are doing really well, and doing the right thing with a slow taper I am doing okay hanging tough just taking one day at a time.

[blazesboylan]

Hello everybody,

 

I hope that everyone in the US is having a pleasant holiday and have managed to get through Black Friday unscatched!

 

I don't really have much to report. I made a cut to the olanzapine on Friday though. I hadn't made any changes there in roughly 5 months.

 

I am doing well generally I suppose. I am getting on with my studies and going to work etc. I am approaching the end of my first semester now.

 

That's all really. I thought that I would check in. I hope that everyone is doing ok.

 

All the best,

Blazes.

[KarenB]

Sounds like your long hold has done you some good.  Keep taking care of yourself, and move at a careful pace.  Contented updates like these are what we like to see!

[blazesboylan]

Hello,

 

I'd just like to wish everyone a Happy Christmas and all the very best in 2017!

 

Blazes.

[blazesboylan]

Hello,

 

I thought that I would check in. Things haven't been great for the past two weeks. I've been feeling a lot of anxiety/depression. Particularly around work. To be honest, work has always been a source of stress/anxiety for me. It's possibly my own fault as I made a cut to both the Effexor and the olanzapine about 4 weeks ago. In retrospect that was probably foolish.

 

To top it all, I felt really bad leaving work on Friday and wandered into a bar. I had worked late. I ended up having many beers. Yesterday I got drunk at home. I hadn't been using antabuse regularly although I have decided now to take it regularly again now. That was my first time drinking in I don't know how long. Now that I am studying I don't have much time to get to many AA meetings either. I am disappointed in myself for drinking though but it's back on the wagon again now.

 

Well, that's all for now. I increased the olanzapine a little. Maybe it will make some difference.

 

Over and out,

Blazes.

[blazesboylan]

Hello,

 

It's me again. At the moment I have to say that I am feeling quite well. However, I fell off the wagon again about a week ago. It was a major fall. I blacked out for a few hours. I was in the horrors for most of last week. Major anxiety/paranoia and generally feeling like crap physically.

 

What led up to it was the fact that I went to a different pharmacy to get my prescription filled and they didn't actually have any antabuse in stock. As a result, I was without it for over a week so I thought that I would risk having a drink. I went on a date and ended up drinking beer. When my date went home I stayed out for 3 or 4 hours. I am not exactly sure where I was or what I was doing but I was around Dublin city centre. Presumably between bars. It frightens me not to know what I was doing though.

 

Anyway, I made it to an AA meeting last night and am hoping to get to a meeting at least once a week now. However, it's tough when I have work full-time and then college on top of that. But, I need to make the effort.

 

On the tapering front, no changes recently. I am thinking of making another cut to the Effexor in a week depending on how I am feeling. At the moment I am feeling well though thankfully.

 

I hope that everyone is doing well.

 

All the best,

Blazes.

[ChessieCat]

Just a tip for the future.  Always make sure you get your drug/s at least a few days, 1 week would be better, before you run out.

 

Put a reminder in your phone.

[Bruin]

Congrats for getting back on the wagon Blazes and so glad that you are feeling well.

[Bridgetini]

Hi Blazes, your post touched me, sorry for not responding sooner. I gave up alcohol in 2009 as I had some terrifying blackouts that people told me about afterwards. It is so scary that you can be totally awake and apparently having a whale of a time, but have no memory of it afterwards. I live in terror of a relapse if I had even that one drink.

Fair play for telling us and for going back into AA.

Sending you good vibes....

[blazesboylan]

Thanks very much Bridgetini,

 

I haven't had a drink in two weeks now. I am taking antabuse every second night. I made it to a meeting at the weekend also. I would go more regularly except that I am working full-time and and studying part-time so I don't really get the chance. Yes, blackouts are really really scary. Alcohol really is a terrible drug. However, it's not going away any time soon.

 

I am reading your signature and I see that your meds quite similar to my own. I was on 300mg venlafaxine myself once. I was using lorazepam for a while also but I switched to valium a few months back. However, I really don't take it regularly. I don't actually have any right now.

 

I'm not doing great at the moment unfortunately. I have major anxiety. All of it is work-related. Things haven't been going too in there well for a while. I am not sure if I am over-sensitive due to withdrawal or if my worry is actually justified. If I lost my job I actually think that it  might be a blessing in disguise though.

 

Physically I do sort of feel withdrawal like symptoms also. But not in a major way. Just slightly odd and mild physical sensations.

 

Anyway, I remind myself that This Will Pass sooner or later. I will be taking a short break from work soon and I think that that will help!

 

I hope that you are doing ok!

 

All the best,

Blazes.

[blazesboylan]

Hello,

 

I haven't been here for a while. I am not doing great these days really. Pretty intense anxiety. I increased the olanzapine a while back and I increased the Effexor today. It's all in my signature. It feels like I may be going backwards unfortunately. I got a short-term prescription for xanax recently which I have been using. Like all benzos I feel that it has little effect. Anyway, I will have run out of the xanax soon. 

 

I will be finishing my first year in college shortly. So, I am doing exams at the moment. And working full-time on top of that. I will get back to the tapering again when I haven't so much going on. I feel in need of a holiday. 

 

That's all so over and out!

 

Blazes.

[Bridgetini]

Hi Blazes, you are doing great! You have a lot on your plate, so try not to beat yourself up.

Did you decide yourself to up your meds again or did a medic advise it? The increase will also mess with your neurotransmitter balance so you will feel awful.

Please try to live each minute one at a time and then eventually the exams will be over.

Have you managed to get some sunshine? It is gone from tomorrow so Dr. Bridgetini prescribes a walk in the sun and an ice-cream. Today. Before sunset.

 

BTW, if you can get Instagram, there are nice little pix to remind you of daily helpful tasks, tagged as #boringselfcare. <3

[blazesboylan]

Thanks Bridgetini

 

I decided to increase the Effexor myself. It wasn't medical advice. Generally when I see a doctor I don't tell them anything about the tapering. I had to try something and though and maybe it is working. I did go to a doctor for the xanax. However, I really think that benzos don't do a whole lot for me. I may have a high tolerance for them. For example, if I took 10mg of valium it would have little effect. If any. Apart from the Effexor I am taking the prescribed dose of the other drugs - the mirtazapine and olanzapine.

 

Since I have increased the Effexor I think that it is having a positive effect however in that I am definitely not feeling the intense anxiety that I was feeling there going on weeks now. However, external circumstances have may have improved also so perhaps that's a factor too.

 

I have two exams out of the way now thankfully. The worst is behind me. I really need to see about getting some time off work soon. I am very tired. I will be spending most of the weekend on college work. Anyway, I think that I will hold steady on the current doses of everything and maybe make a small cut to the Effexor in a month's time if I am feeling well enough.

 

Not great weather for getting outdoors at the moment. The weather forecast seems to be a bit mixed for the weekend. However, I will try to get out.

 

I hope that you have a good weekend yourself. And everyone else also.

 

All the best,

Blazes.

[blazesboylan]

Greetings,

 

Happy weekend everybody. I'm out of Dublin for the weekend in a very pleasant and tranquil spot. I am by myself and enjoying it.

 

I have been been suffering with major anxiety for a while now however. Well, I said this already above. Today I am feeling quite well though. However, I am not at work and most of my anxiety is work related. Which has often been an issue for me. There is a guy on my team who is pretty unpleasant to deal with. I dread him getting in touch with me or having to deal with him at all. However, I do have to deal with him regularly enough unfortunately. Never in person though. He is on a different continent. Most of our interaction is electronic. So, I have made a couple of job applications in the last few days. There's a lot I don't like about my current job.

 

Anyway, as regards the tapering, I am thinking that I will try to taper the olanzapine and leave the Effexor along for a while. That is if the anxious mood lifts. I won't make any changes before then. Would anyone have any advice for me? I worry about tardive dyskenesia. Especially as I am in my 40s. I actually know an old guy who has been on anti-psychotics for years and his jaw trembles. Probably a TD symptom. I know that it is advised to taper SSRIs and SNRIs first. But, I think that I might have more success getting off the olanzapine. Well, we will see.

 

That's all for now.

 

All the best,

Blazes.

[Altostrata]

Good to hear from you, Blazes.

 

Interesting experiment, there. Seems you have isolated the source of your anxiety. Have you considered going to a counselor specifically for coping with stress at work? That could relieve you from having to take drugs.

 

You are correct that long-term olanzapine carries the risk of movement disorder.

[blazesboylan]

Hello @Altostrata. Thanks for your reply. As it so happens I have organised a few sessions with a therapist soon. We will see if it helps or not. Hopefully it will.

 

As regards the drugs, I don't feel that they are helping now and I am not sure if they ever did really.

[Altostrata]

Since you've identified work as the source of your distress, I strongly recommend that be the focus of your sessions with the therapist.

[blazesboylan]

Hello,

 

I see that SA has got a new look since I was last here! I like it 

 

Thankfully the anxiety seems to have settled a little. At long last and may it last long!

 

So, as I was saying above I have decided to maybe focus on reducing the olanzapine for a while. I have made very good progress on the Effexor. When I started I was taking 300mgs per day.

 

No news really. A lot of rain in Dublin over the last few days. A typical Irish summer.

 

All the best,

Blazes.

 

 

[blazesboylan]

Hello,

 

Happy weekend everybody  I thought that I would check in as I haven't been here for a while. 

 

I have made another cut to the olanzapine. So far so good although my sleep is slightly disturbed. I tend to dream intensely and then wake up before the alarm clock. I can normally get back to sleep for a while though so it's not too bad. It will probably settle in a while.

 

My mood has been pretty good for the last while actually. Very little anxiety. Long may it last. I am going to the U2 concert in Dublin this evening. Something that I am looking forward to. I am very lucky to be going actually. It was almost impossible to get tickets!

 

All the best,

Blazes.

[Laura1981]

Hi all,

 

with a very heavy heart I have to announce that blazesboylan has passed away.

 

I have just come back from his funeral. We lived in the same city and have become very good friends over the last 2.5 years.

 

He was a kind-hearted, funny and intelligent man. The world really lost someone very special. Despite what you would think from reading his thread, he was suffering a lot.  It must have become unbearable for him.

 

I'm at a loss for words. Yet another precious life taken absolutely unnecessarily.

 

Please join me in remembering the kind, positive, optimistic, good hearted man he was.

 

Laura

 

 

 

[Bridgetini]

Dear Laura,

I am really sorry for your loss. Thank you for letting us know. I will miss him here checking in and updating us - it was great support to know that there are others going through similar trials in life. 

Not sure what to say...

I hope that you are doing okay, and everyone else affected by his loss.

Bridgetini

 

 

[Laura1981]

Thank you for your kind words Bridgetini!

 

I wish you lots of success with your taper and hope you're doing well.

[powerback]

Sad to hear, respect to to he's soul ,I'm not far from Dublin myself .

Peace to him .

PB

[apace41]

This is very, very sad to read.  

 

I did not know him, Laura, but knowing you I'm sure he was a great guy. I am sorry for you and his family.  It's all so sad and needless.

 

To honor you and him:

 

 

May the road rise up to meet you.
May the wind always be at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
and rains fall soft upon your fields.
And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of His hand.

 

Best,

 

Andy

[direstraits]

so sorry to read of another senseless loss on here....my condolences to you,Laura and his family and friends.

 

when will the madness end.

[Laura1981]

Thanks so much everyone for the good wishes! His family is devastated obviously. I don't think they understood the role the drugs played though.