Ssriwarrior: My taper off of Lexapro 10mg

[Altostrata]

Ssriw, if you are getting 6 hours of sleep, if I were you, I'd focus on improving that with non-drug means while holding on tapering, to let your nervous system settle down.

[Ssriwarrior]

Thanks for the feedback. I would say I am averaging 3-4 hours of sleep, that one night of 6 was lucky.

 

I'm exhausted! And scared. Im wondering if I made a mistake by trying to taper and should have just stayed at 10 forever. Or stopped at 5mg. Part of me wants to go back but I know my nervous system is so unsteady that 5 mg would be way stimulating. I think the updose to 2.5 is what sparked the insomnia....hoping and praying things will level out as my brain adjusts to the updose...any ideas on how long that could be? It's been a week...

I've been holding off on the melatonin for past 3 nights but maybe I need to try that again.

 

I'm so tired I can't tell what is what. I'm also so fearful that I have jeporadized my role as a mother cause I don't know how I can run a household and work feeling this worn out. I feel selfish for trying to get off antidepressants if it means I can't be an attuned mother. So much is coming up and I feel like I could manage it all if sleep gets restored.

One thing is for sure I'm staying at 2.5 for awhile. No more switching and updosing is obviously not the best choice. Lesson learned.

[Frustrated]

I reinstated and it is causing me issues. Now I am stuck. I dropped the dose but I am stuck on a small dose now until I can taper because I can't just stop. I understand about feeling guilty about your mothering abilities. I have three kids at home and I am a single mom. My 4 year old is running around because Santa is coming and my legs are paining so bad I am on the couch. I am stuck riding out the storm and pray it doesn't last much longer. Btw don't feel guilty about wanting to be drug free. It doesn't make you selfish. You deserve it.

[wantrelief]

I have had the exact same problem with up dosing. I had gotten to 12.6 mg Celexa but started to have really bad anxiety that was not going away so I increased every week or two and now am at 16 mg for almost two weeks. I think I've been getting around 4 hours of sleep (and I take Klonopin too so that clearly is not helping). It has been miserable. I am still also feeling sick - lots of anxiety, trouble eating, intrusive thoughts. I am planning to stay at this dose for awhile and hope it settles down with time but it has been such a rough road for at least a month or more now. I hope you stabilize soon....I think you will as your increase was not as much as mine was.

[mammaP]

I feel for you with the insomnia, I suffer with it too and get so exhausted I can't think straight and feel sick.

I do the same as Dalsaan and go to bed to rest. I don't even think about going to sleep because the more I

think about it the harder it is so I just enjoy the rest, snuggled in my lovely comfy bed and enjoy the feeling

of being cocooned and safe. Sometimes I get a few hours, sometimes not but I don't worry about it any more

unless I go for days with no sleep at all, then I am a monster!  I don't have any children at home though and 

can understand why you are feeling rough when you have little ones to look after. 7

I agree that you would be best to hold where you are for a while to allow your nervous system to stabilise. 

It could take a while but will settle down eventually. Then you can start a micro taper from the last little bit. 

[Ssriwarrior]

Thanks everyone.

 

I'm getting a bit longer stretches of sleep now and hoping that continues. Although it is very light sleep and I'm having horrible nightmares. I wake up frequently but am able to fall back asleep and for that I am thankful.

 

I'm really struggling with regret. I go back in forth in my mind on if I should re-instate more and slowly go back to 5mg. But I know that my nervous system is so hypersensitive I fear increasing the dose could cause more insomnia/anxiety. Then I'm like maybe 5htp??? At a super small dose?

 

Had I know this would happen I don't think I ever would have tried to come off. I want to be able to be the mother my daughter deserves and tapering while mothering just feels so hard.

 

I know I need to just stay at 2.5 for a while and let things settle but part of me feels like I should find a psychiatrist and contemplate a way to get back to 5. I feel so lost and scared.

[LoveandLight]

Totally feel the same..xx

[Ssriwarrior]

I know the holidays are a hard time for most, but jeez this has been an extremely hard time! 

 

I fantasize about the days when I was on even 5 mg of lexapro and able to eat anything and drink wine and I long for those days.  But really more than anything I long for deep sleep. 

 

I keep getting this panic that I need to re-instate, but it sounds like from other folks that it's not a guarantee to bring me back to "normal".  In fact, since the insomnia started when I updosed .25 I'm thinking jumping back up 2.5mg could create even more sleepless nights.  

 

Would love to hear any success stories from re-instating.  

 

I came soooooooo close to scheduling an appointment with a psychiatrist today.  I'm that desperate.  Even though I know the truth about psychiatry, I feel like maybe I've been on the AD too long to come off and be able to live a normal life in this culture and that maybe I need to just go back on the AD indefinitely.  But that I've actually made my prognosis worse by trying the slow taper and now I will have to add a sleep med or benzo to get my deep sleep back.  

 

These are the darkest days of the year.  I have to keep reminding myself that.  The sun will come back, sleep will come back, and hell can't last forever, right?  Well not 100% certainly as many of the threads on here reveal.  

 

I'm contemplating adding some grains back into my diet.  I think starting with rice could help, as I just feel so so so restricted and just want to have a little more ease.  

[wantrelief]

I feel the exact same way.  As I mentioned above, I too was doing a slow taper but hit a rough patch - updosed and am trying to stabilize.  I have read a couple of success stories where it took a long time but people did stabilize eventually on a low dose.  For me it is the waiting part that is awful - and the fear that this is not going to work.  I am finding it really hard to function and have a lot of suicidal thoughts which are sometimes overwhelming.  I too feel very lost and scared.  Just wanted you to know you are not alone!  I feel like I need constant reassurance that I am on the right path, that staying at this dose will work eventually as I feel like my life is falling apart. 

[bubble]

hi Warrior,

 

I understand how you feel. A bit over a year ago Rhi wrote on my thread that we feel awful we want to do something anything to get a relief, to feel a tiny bit better.

 

But the major breakthrough in my relation to psychotropic medications was the realisation that in such situations it's best to do NOTHING.

 

It's not a particular dose that fixes things but stability over time. Fear is our worst enemy, fear that things will spiral out of control and this is a beginning of worse things to come. But it's not. It's just neuroemotions. Acceptance is our main ally. Acceptance that things are as they are AT PRESENT,only now. And if we patiently endure them, they will go away. Holding righ were we are is our best bet. Updosing is often seen to make things worse because it introduces change and changes mean more destabilisation, that is more symptoms.

 

Don't change anything and you will soon experience what I call the miracle of holding:thing getting better without changing the drugs, actually because of not changing the drugs.

 

Risking that I will sound as Jesus, all I can say is don't fear and have faith. Holds heal. I'm writing from my phone so can't post the link to neuroemotions and a post in which Rhi explained the logic behind what we witness in practice:miracle of holding.

[Tkcring]

I don't know if I can help because my withdrawl was ZOLOFT. I am now 9 weeks completely off. I tapered way too fast after being on it for 2 months. My worst symptom by far has been SEVERE INSOMNIA. I would say borderline suicidal insomnia (if that's a thing). In my personal opinion, there is no greater hell, than severe insomnia. I am finally, finally experiences windows of deeper sleep that is not fragmented. I am also and always have been very high anxiety and always on the go and my mind always moving. So I feel there is hope. I've cried myself to sleep many nights just wanting rest. There is hope. It makes me more positive for the future. I wish you rest and sleep and you're in my thoughts.

[Ssriwarrior]

thanks all!  

 

Wow, I am just so unsure of how to proceed.  It sounds like waiting to stabilize is my only option.  

 

I want to go back to 5mg very very slowly, but fear that it would increase insomnia.  

 

I have a phone consultation with Dr. Stuart Shipko today, but in reading some other threads, it sounds like he won't be able to give much hope.  

 

And that's the thing, is I just need hope!  I could get through this if I knew there was an end in sight.  I could tolerate ANY withdrawal symptom if I could rest.   This is truly hell and I am so afraid that I will lose my mind if I don't sleep well soon.  Can you die from sleep deprivation?  ha.  it feels like it.  It doesn't feel like my nervous system can ever heal unless i get some good sleep.  just venting...

[bubble]

I'm sorry things are still not better but I still feel confident they will. Lex is a nasty drug but I stabilized and you will too (and I CTed Xanax as well

 

Insomnia is awful. But here we see people who manage on very little sleep for very long. However dreadful it feels you can't die from sleep deprivation. Some people manage on even less. Lately I just repeat all the time that fear is our worst enemy. But you are thinking in the right way.

 

All I can do is try to give you some hope because there is hope. Things do get better. I can't word this any better at the moment but others will.

 

All we can do is put one foot in front of the other and then again and again. I'm sure dreariness and gloominess is not helping any of us...

 

hugs

 

Bubble

[LexAnger]

Hi Worrior, it's me here to your thread. Based on my personal experience of increasing lex dose from 2.7 to 4.5 6 months ago, I don't recommend you to reinstate back to 5mg. I was almost killed by the severe drug reaction by that increase. You may think 5mg may be the right dose doing the fine job as it did before, most probably you will get different results this time. It's hard to predict what things would be like exactly with the reinstate, its possible it will fix the sleep problem but it can also bring tons of other problems you never had before. Our brains are very dynamic and can be very different and sensitive after the drug and WD history. I agree with bubble on the importance of no change as it seems that's what are causing all my problems. I also remeber another member who reinstated from 0 to 2.5 of lex who got hit even more severe and stooped updating his situation. If you feel a definite need to increase dose, I would strongly suggest to do it with a very small dose (not more than 0.25) and don't expect immediate effect (mistake I made and how I increase little by little then more little within one day).

 

I know we all all different and no one knows how each brain reacts to the same situation, but like to remind you for extra caution.

 

Hope you are feeling a bit better at this moment.

[btdt]

I'm sorry things are still not better but I still feel confident they will. Lex is a nasty drug but I stabilized and you will too (and I CTed Xanax as well

 

Insomnia is awful. But here we see people who manage on very little sleep for very long. However dreadful it feels you can't die from sleep deprivation. Some people manage on even less. Lately I just repeat all the time that fear is our worst enemy. But you are thinking in the right way.

 

All I can do is try to give you some hope because there is hope. Things do get better. I can't word this any better at the moment but others will.

 

All we can do is put one foot in front of the other and then again and again. I'm sure dreariness and gloominess is not helping any of us...

 

hugs

 

Bubble

I can say I went cold turkey from Effexor and went thru many many months of insomnia.  I could go for 3 days without sleep I would lay very still and try to rest my body but after a few days my thinking would get scary as luck would have it usually I would sleep that 3rd day.  That was the worst of it I really think 3-4 hours sleep was the break thru point for me I went a least a year getting this amount of sleep it took a year at least to reach this level of sleep.  The 3-4 hours we a blessing as long as it came each day I could keep my mind together... it came oddly either I was getting up at 4am or going to sleep at 4am... for me those were the hours.  I recall reading this has something to do with cortistol but don't recall what as I have no memory for such things.  When I really can't sleep now and I need to I  use a utube video to help me relax and sometimes  it works if it doesn't work deep relaxation is the next best thing to sleep. I have come to function ok on 4 hours any more is a bonus. Some days now I can sleep 6-8 hours it has taken a long time but it has improved greatly from where I was at the beginning of cold turkey.  

I wish you all healing sleep and peace. 

[wantrelief]

I was wondering how your consultation went with Dr. Shipko? I hope he was able to provide some guidance.

 

I was also curious if you are having any other symptoms aside from insomnia? Has your sleep improved at all while holding at your current dose? I am finding mine goes up and down but maybe some slight improvement while holding. I am hoping it improves for both of us in time.

[Ssriwarrior]

Dr Shipko was sympathetic but not much insight on the sleep piece. He advised slowly re-instating back to 5 mg at the rate I tapered. I'm going to give it one more week and try. He said if adverse reactions stop going up immediately.

Sleep has gotten worse with more frequent wakings in between. I think the melatonin isn't working anymore.

 

Has anyone tried Ambien? I'm feeling that desperate and don't want to try benzodiazepines...

[Ssriwarrior]

In terms of other symtpoms the main one is suicidal depression. I've had suicidal thoughts before but this is way more intense where I have an actual plan and have been googling it. Very very scary.

 

I feel like I'm losing everything. Don't know how long my husband will tolerate the withdrawal and I'm not able to mother how my daughter needs me. She is acting out in response to my extreme exhaustion. I fear it's just a matter of time till I'm unable to work of sleep is not restored soon. Having lots and lots of anxiety and fear and it all feels related to sleeplessness.

 

I know suicide would devastate my family even worse than me being in WD but I feel like such a burden and feel like this could go on for years and I frankly can't fathom the idea of being disabled and not working. It seems like SSRIs have a built in mechanism for self destruction.

 

I'm still working with a therapist and we are spending so much money on my healing right now I just feel so guilty. I recognize this is a part of withdrawal but truly don't know how much longer I can do this. I have 2 shamanic healing sessions next week and I'm praying for a miracle...

[LoveandLight]

I feel the same and I'm sorry.

 

You have a lot to live for it sounds like when you get through this.

[Ssriwarrior]

I appreciate everyone's support. In re-reading LexAngers response I have big hesitations about reinstating back to 5. I think I am just reaching for a magic bullet and felt like that would be something to hold on to...deep down in my gut something tells me it would be too stimulating at this point. Thanks again for your help.

[LexAnger]

Hi Worrior, I wonder why you are keep thinking 5mg? That's a big jump (more than 100%). Although each person van be very different, I still feel its Ricky to increase that much. What is the reason you don't consider smaller increase?

[wantrelief]

I am so so sorry you are feeling the way you are.  Aside from insomnia, I too have had very vivid suicidal thoughts/images that are so frightening.  There have been quite a few good posts this week from others feeling the same way (I have been reading here kind of obsessively).  I think one of the posts was in Givemepeace's thread and some very good advice was given there was to how to deal with these awful thoughts.  In my thread, Mammap posted some links to some past discussions on the subject as well which were helpful.  Maybe they would also be of some comfort to you.

 

I also have this huge fear of losing everything in my life, that I am never going to function normally again and just be a burden to those around me.  I think we forget in this state of mind (as you said, it is indeed a part of withdrawal) how much we mean to others as right now our lives don't feel like they have meaning but others don't see it that way.  We are still us, that is what they see even through our suffering.  And indeed their lives would be so irrevocably changed for the worse if we were to act on the thoughts.  

 

I know what you mean though with the thoughts of not being sure how much longer you can do this.  I think that a lot too as this is no way to live. I am trying to not think ahead too much and just do one day at a time - just get through the day.  I also have felt this horrible before and came out of it - as soon as I felt better the thoughts/fears went away.  Of course now I have this huge fear that this time I won't get better and will be stuck like this but I am writing this now when my mind is relatively calmer and I can think more rationally.  

 

I have read about others in similar situations as both of us and they did eventually stabilize.  I can only hope we will be the same.  There also have been some good responses on my thread for why it is good to stay at one dose.  I have to keep re-reading them to believe that this is the right path as it is so tempting to want to go up more - it is hard to believe we can stabilize at a lower dose but it does seem to happen.

 

I know it won't necessarily make you feel better but you are not alone out there feeling this way.  At least we have one another to support each other through this horrible time.  I will be thinking about you…...

[Ssriwarrior]

Thanks so much wantrelief.

 

I really don't want to jump straight back to 5. I have just been feeling so desperate for relief even a gradual updose back to 5 feels alluring. Truly though deep down I am pretty sure it would be too stimulating at this point. I just want to go back 6 months to how things were. No it wasn't perfect but I could function and I just fantasize about going back to how things were.

 

I don't really want to die. In reading through my journal it seems like when I take melatonin I feel more suicidal the next day. So that's an interesting insight.

 

I think the true despair comes from knowing I still have 2.5 more mg to go. If I was feeling this horrible completely off the drug Id be able to hold on to hope that this would pass....but I'm not even off yet and it feels like Hell. So that is why the draw to go back on more of the drug is so strong. I feel like it was a huge mistake to slow taper without fully knowing how disruptive this would be to my family.

[LoveandLight]

Totally feel the same I've got 12.5mg to go also and In hell but I was never very functional before anyway hehe.

 

We will get there!!

[mammaP]

I am sorry you are still feeling this way, I know how it is and have been there. I quit effexor after a too fast taper and 

crashed after a month of being off. I reinstated and felt better but that didn't last and soon I had a long drawn out

wave that seemed to go on and on. Some days I could barely move, couldn't sleep and laid in bed wondering why

I was carrying on. I felt suicidal and what stopped me was just putting it off for another day, another week.

Then the window opened and I started to feel better. I still have insomnia but it is a problem that has been with me 

for many years and I cope with about 3 hours. I went days at a time with no sleep at all and felt like I was going to

die!  I also knew instinctively that updosing would lead to more problems and couldn't take the risk.

The waves come and go but they are less intense. I still get suicidal thoughts but don't entertain them and they pass. 

You will stabilise, your brain and nervous system are working hard trying to regain your pre drug state and that takes time. 

It really will get better.   Hang in there. 

 

Here are some links to threads I started on suicidal thoughts. 

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/7619-help-for-those-who-are-feeling-desperate-or-suicidal/

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4678-suicide-ideation/?hl=%2Bsuicide+%2Bideation

[Ssriwarrior]

Thanks you guys!  

 

I apologize for my loads of posts here and my back and forth and uncertainty.  It's been a whirlwind.  

 

The past 2 nights i have gotten close to 7 hours of sleep (fragmented) after taking some herbs the acupuncturist gave me.  I know this is controversial, but I was desperate and I was trying to avoid a pharmaceutical sleep med.  It seems to have really helped.  It's a deeper sleep and the acupuncturist said the herbs are not psychoactive.  They don't work on any neurotransmitters in the brain but rather grounding the spirit into the body.   I continue to do the magnesium, bone broth, sleep hygiene, yoga nidra/relaxation, etc.  Maybe I'm starting to stabilize?  

 

I also had a shamanic healing session yesterday that left me feeling very relaxed.  He worked to clear out a lot of ancestral guilt/shame/worry that was not my own energy.  I realize that sounds insane, but shamanism has been a modality that has resonated with me for years.  I still believe the body/mind/spirit are connected and am holding on to this faith that the spirit can influence healing of the body/mind.  

 

I wouldn't say I'm 100% better, but getting some sleep has really helped to calm everything down, including the extreme worry and panic.  I've been able to catch up on chores around the house and errands and am feeling like life feels a bit more manageable.  Adding grains back was not a good idea, as I started to get bloating and inflammation.  So I'm sticking with the paleo for now even though it is so restrictive.  And lots of water.  

 

The part that is so hard with all this, is when I try to explain it to friends and family none of this makes sense.  No one understands how the nervous system can become hypersensitive after a slow taper and most seem to think this is all an indication that I need the meds forever. And some days I believe that too.  It is such a challenge to live in this society while going through withdrawal.  Very isolating.  So I am so thankful and grateful for this site and everyone who contributes to it.  I only wish we could all meet up for lunch and connect in person. 

[bubble]

I was hoping to read such an update so thanks for sharing!

 

Things might still be wobbly, up and down. Shamanism sounds very interesting and there are quite a few people here with experience of it. Body, mind and spirit are definitely connected.

 

Seeing that I can get better without changing the drugs despite that strong urge to go up or down to feel better was incredibly important in reclaiming control over my life.

 

I hope the same for you.

[wantrelief]

So good to hear your update - I am so glad you are feeling better!  

[Altostrata]

Very good to hear, SSRIwarrior, it sounds like you have found some ways to calm your nervous system.

[Ssriwarrior]

Areyouthere how much water did you use to dilute the liquid??

 

So after several weeks of up and down sleep/insomnia I'm truly considering another tiny tiny reinstatement. Like .50 mg using the liquid. I've held at 2.5 now for a month and feel fairly stable mood wise despite my inability to sleep and rest deeply. I know it's a crapshoot but I figure if I try it one day and makes sleep even worse I will stop immediately and stay at 2.5.

 

I'm not feeling suicidal anymore, just more like a huge sense of regret. I'm lowering my expectations of performance which is hard and doing the very best I can to be a "good enough" mother while being so tired. I feel like a walking zombie, an empty shell of the productive woman I used to be. Where so far I'm still able to play the part but feel inside that I can't go on like this much longer.

 

My naturopath thinks the insomnia and depression are caused by inflammation of the gut. He says interlukin 2 and 6 have created a virus in my gut and my immune system is attacking itself, that when the body is experiencing inflammation so will the brain and insomnia is a natural consequence of this. Makes sense. I did try adding some carbs (rice/mullet) and whey protein back into my diet and that could be what caused more inflammation. Because otherwise I eat extremely healthy and inflammation is just a part of withdrawal.

 

So as much as spiritual work/healing has been helpful, I'm leaning more and more towards a tiny tiny reinstatement.

[bubble]

I wouldn't up the dose, not even tiny. You are improving and will continue to do so. 

 

It is stability that heals. In our situation symptoms are a sign of a brain that has been distresses through too many changes, Changes mean more instability and instability means more symptoms.

 

For me it was very important to understand the basics of science behind what is happening to us on these drugs. It helped me endure and understand why changing doses and drugs is bad, why stability is good and why it takes so long to stabilise.

 

We are very lucky that our member Rhi can explain it so clearly to us. I'm coping what she wrote for another member. I just deleted things which don't relate to your situation.  

Rhi, on 16 Jan 2015 - 5:10 PM, said:

(...)  Every time we start these drugs, stop them, go up and down in dosages, whatever, our bodies struggle to reestablish homeostasis, turning genes on and off, attempting to activate and deactivate complex nanosecond feedback loops, synthesizing proteins, breaking down proteins, and that's just the little bit that I've learned about it; there's much, much more.

 

Neurophysiology is incredibly complex (a couple of orders of magnitude more complex than even the most exquisite device ever created by humans)(amazing what nature can do with four billion years of tweaking time). And as organisms, we have never before encountered anything anywhere close to what these drugs do to disrupt neurochemistry and the endocrine system. Evolution hasn't had the chance to develop ways to adjust, heal, tweak and adapt to these drugs. Our brains are accustomed to much more subtle and gradual variations in neurotransmitters (caused by things like hormonal changes of puberty, seasonal changes in day length, aging, etc.) and even those can mess us up. 

 

And the drugs affect more than just neurotransmitters. 

 

(...) The brain and body are not, not, NOT machines. We have this unconscious bias in Western science, due to human arrogance or what-have-you, that makes us think we humans are smarter than nature, and we talk about bodies as if they were like cars, just an assemblage of parts, easily understood. Not, sadly, true. Biochemistry is amazingly, incredibly, unbelievably complex, and nowhere more complex than in the nervous system. Far, far beyond anything humans can even imagine creating. Not mechanical in function. And much more poorly understood than anyone wants to admit.

 

 

That's why I stick with stability. Whenever we change something we annul all the hard work on this molecular levels that our brain has done. 

[Ssriwarrior]

Thanks again everyone. I've been re-reading my posts and realize I may sound "bipolar" with all this ambivalence I've been going back and forth so much on this idea of reinstatement.

 

It's just that I feel so desperate and most of my old coping vices are not an option in withdrawal...

 

I would like to express how thankful I am for all of your insights.

 

I would also like to try and put into words how devastating withdrawal is even if I am preaching to the choir. The extreme fear of loss of function of feeling like an outsider looking in and seeing others going on with their life while if feels like I'm losing my existence is truly terrifying. Even if this is all a neuroemotion it doesn't negate how difficult it is to feel and experience it. And to think that the pharmaceutical companies have this built in taboo about mental suffering in our culture so that no one speaks about being on antidepressants in the first place, much less withdrawing from them. So that we can get labeled as having psychosomatic symtpoms and that this is all in our head. Everyone on this board is truly a pioneer in the uncovering of a huge lie of the chemical imbalance theory....if only the general public would believe us!!

 

Scared, isolated, but not giving up hope.

[bubble]

Don't feel bad about anything, especially not with us. We've all been there: thinking about reinstating and doing something, just anything to end this horror that is taking soooo long.

 

Unfortunately nobody can believe it until they feel it themselves and then it's too late. 

 

We are not giving hope

[LexAnger]

I was there in your situation last 2013 August down to 2.5 from 10 in 5 months and hit the wall. I backed up to 2.7 withing couple of weeks then things got lots better with ery bad jaw pain only. My increase again to 4.5 2013 June caused the most severe reaction. You have been for 5 months since 2.5. It can be still ok to increase just a tiny bit like 0.1 or 0.2 gradually if you are still suffering a lot. You may still feel a bit reaction to the increase but if it help with a quicker stabilization, you can start a slow taper from there. I feel I'm close to a stable point now after 5 month horrible suffering tapering down from 4.5 to the current 3.8 in 5 months.

[Ssriwarrior]

Thanks lexanger.  

 

I don't know what I'm going to do.  I think after the end of this week, I may try .25 increase to see if that helps.  

 

Just wanted to share this headband for anyone who struggles with insomnia; it has helped me to fall back asleep when I wake up: 

http://www.sleepphones.com

 

not a miracle, but a helpful tool.  

[Ssriwarrior]

Alright yall, so I caved and made an appointment with a "functional medicine" psychiatrist. She specializes in trancranial magnetic stimulation and again I'm reaching of some sort of magic bullet to save me.

 

I searched the board and only found one success story from TMS. A mad in America article compared it to watered down ECT...I'm skeptical.

 

I'm also extremely extremely skeptical of psychiatry but feel that desparate for something to help pull me out of this misery. Even knowing how damaging these drugs are I feel willing to take a risk and try updosing or adding another because I just want my life back.

 

I wake up at midnight, 3am, and then 5am like clock work the past week. I practice extreme sleep hygiene and just don't feel like I can survive with disrupted sleep for much longer. Not trying to discount those who have been struggling for longer with insomnia but it's really created a sense of desperation and panic I'm not used to...